Dean looked around the cemetery he and his little brother were walking through, spotting someone else out for a casual looking stroll.  With it being midnight, and this cemetery supposedly being haunted by demons....  Probably not what it seemed.  "Do we know him?" he asked with a subtle point.

Sam Winchester looked, pushing some hair out of his eyes.  "I've seen him at the kids' school."  They shared a look and walked casually that way.  "Hey, I didn't know we had a school field trip out here."

The other guy jumped but they saw they had snuck up on him from his blind side.  He was wearing an eye patch on the side they were standing on.  "Oh, hey.  No, not a field trip."  He stared at them for a moment.  "Hunters too?" he asked dryly.

"Yeah," Dean said.  "I'm Dean, this is Sam.  You?"

"Xander Harris."  He held out a hand.  "I know you two from somewhere."

"Do you work at a school by any chance?" Sam asked.

Xander grinned.  "No, I run a bookstore with an extras room in the back.  But I have kids that go to a local elementary school.  You probably saw me picking up one of them."

"Probably," Dean agreed.  "Mine's in kindergarten this year.  Sammy's is in the same class."

"I've got one that they skipped to first grade and one that decided she didn't want to skip and threw a fit when we talked about it so she's still in kindergarten.  Bri's mine."

"We're Bobby and Missy's parents," Sam said with a grin.

"Ah!  Bri's talked about your two little pouncing heathens who helped her get the bullies from her sister's class last week.  Nice work you taught them."  They grinned.  "So, work or pleasure bring you out tonight?"

"Work," Dean said, shifting to glance around.  "We've been tracking some rumors of a large, horned demon that keeps scaring the crap out of people out here.  He's been said to be causing some chaos."

"Horned... slime?"  They shook their heads.  "Huh.  That'd probably be D'Hoffryn then.  He's the head over all the vengeance demons."

"How do you know that?" Sam asked.

"I dated one of his when she was fired."  He grinned.  "She's the reason I have kids.  After she was killed, we found out she left a time delayed curse on me to give me a family.  She knew I wanted one but I wouldn't make her give birth or help me raise one so she set it to go off once I got over my grief from losing her and was in a stable place.  I get back from Africa and found out I had twins thanks to D'Hoffryn, who giggled his horns nearly loose because of it."  He grinned.  "Winchester.....  If I remember right, aren't you guys traveling hunters?"

"Sammy caught mono," Dean said dryly.  "We're stuck while he's sick, tired, and weak."

He nodded.  "I can understand that fully.  We had a few slayers with it."  They looked confused.  Xander grinned.  "I work with the Watchers Council.  The old Sunnydale group I was part of is now the head of it."  They both took a step back.  "Willow's back to normal, guys.  Really.  She's over her grief and all that stuff."  He leaned against a headstone, looking around.  "I can feel you, D'Hoffryn."  He appeared, looking amused.  "Long time no see.  You haven't even checked on the twins recently.  Something horrible going on that we need to tell a slayer about?"

"No, I needed you both here because we have a problem like your curse going on."  Xander smirked at him, shaking his head slightly.  "We have three souls that have to come back.  It's very important that they come back."

"Like prophecy important, slayer or chosen one important, or they're annoying the crap outta you guys so you want them gone important?" Xander asked.

"Do we know how to kill this thing if it ends up being dangerous?" Sam whispered to Xander.

Xander grinned.  "Anya did tell me how, yeah.  She had PMS and was really pissed at him."  He looked at the head demon again.  "Which is it?"

"Two of them are annoying everyone in hell and beyond," he admitted.  "The other is important in the future.  Once all the slayers fall, she'll be the one to revive them, though we're not sure she'll come back as a female.  That's roulette you know."

Xander stared at him.  "What do you mean the slayers are going to fall?" he asked with fake casualness.  They could hear the ice under the words.

D'Hoffryn took a step back before answering.  "The one who wanted the one there," he said with a point at Sam, "has a new plan.  She's mad at Summers for stopping her plans with the First."

"Uh-huh," Xander said dryly.

"Lilith's back?" Dean demanded.

D'Hoffryn nodded with an evil smirk.  "She is.  She's not the usual Sunnydale style apocalypse.  She's much more modern."

"So were the Bringers that blew up the old Council," Xander said impatiently, standing upright again.  "When?  If you tell me and give me more info so we can stop the bitch, we'll see what we can do about getting them good parents.  Dawn's a good age and she knows what it's like to be chosen thanks to her sister."

"It took three demons to mark them as rebirths, Harris."

He burst out laughing.  "Hallie, Anya, and who?" he demanded with a smirk.

"Mestistopoles.  They're *really* upsetting parts of hell."

Dean blinked a few times, looking at his brother then at him.  "Is one our father, dude?"

"Yes," he said grimly.  "And if he doesn't quit pissing me off he's coming back as a girl."  He glared at them.  "There's a movement to make you both immortal so we never have to see any of you again.  Especially not after Lilith's last fiasco."

"Heard about that but I was in Africa at the time," Xander admitted, looking at Sam.  "I thought it was just me that drew demons that bad onto their heads for no reason other than being born."

"No, Sammy does it all the time," Dean said sarcastically.

D'Hoffryn shook his head.  "He has nothing on this one.  This one ended up dating an enslaved soul that was reanimated and killing people.  Then made her want him enough that she gave up and went back to being a mummy.  And that was probably the nicer one."

"You know, Cordy didn't try to kill me physically.  Neither did Anya.  They're probably the nicest of my former girls," Xander pointed out.

"Anyanka wanted to curse you so bad she managed to screw up your life in the guise of giving you what you wanted.  Or else you'd have a new girlfriend, Harris."

"I do have a new girlfriend.  She loves the girls and the mini-slayers I have staying with us.  She thinks they're little heathens and going to go to hell for their pranks but she loves 'em anyway."  He grinned sweetly.  "And she knows about hunting since she's a As'Watna assassin demon who retired last year."

Dean whimpered, staring at Xander in horror.  "You're dating a what?"

Xander grinned but shrugged one-sidedly.  "She's nice.  She's sweet to me and the girls.  She's great in bed and she doesn't mind when I burn toast some mornings.  She understands about apocalypse duties.  She helps in the bookstore."  He beamed at Sam.  "You'd really like her.  She's very nice and only tries to kill the occasional mouse that sneaks into the bookstore.  Or the witch that tried to sneak in as a mouse and scared Bri."  He looked at D'Hoffryn again.  "You're here to deliver, aren't you?" he sighed.

"I am," he said, looking very smug.

"Uh-huh.  I want dossiers on who they were, why they're being sent back, and if there's any future prophecies or anything about them.  I also don't want them to be newborns.  I can't handle that again."

"We remember you accidentally casting chaos spells when the twins wouldn't let you sleep.  It was amusing when hell went fuschia because Briony thought it'd be a good color but you hated it."

Xander grinned.  "That was before or after the teething?"

"After, Harris.  Teething made us all take a year-long vacation to other planes because we had to stabilize ours.  You nearly ruined it for us."

"You're welcome," he said cheerfully.

D'Hoffryn glared.  "So I'm allowed to age them to around two or three if you want."

"Three, preferably potty trained," Xander said firmly.  The demon looked so confused.  "I had a hard enough time potty training the Bride of Frankenstein and the Dracula twins, D'Hoffryn.  Remember, people use toilets, babies use diapers."

"Oh, that.  That's a boon I can give you and the dossiers but I can't tell you more than there are prophecies about one of them."

"Can you name the prophecy or an approximate age?"

"That I may be able to do."

"Why call us here?" Dean asked.  It seemed those two were so chummy so why have them involved?  Even if one was their father.

"Because your father annoys me to no end," he growled.  "He's going to be a little girl who loves ponies and flowers very shortly.  I thought you might want to take him in.  If not, I can easily give her to Harris too."

Xander shrugged.  "I've got my two and the three mini-mites of terror," he said dryly.  "Is three more really going to make much of a difference?"

"Probably not with how horrible and chaotic your children already are.  You do know that Ethan Rayne is looking forward to the time when he can ask Amanda to join him?"

"I'll do what Ripper has so much fun doing and beat his ever-Janus-loving ass," he said impatiently.  "If she wants to do chaos magic, she can learn the same way Willow did.  Hopefully without the screw ups though."  He blinked a few times.  "Boys?  I get a boy?"

"It's a roulette.  We don't get to decide that," he said, looking impatient.

"I'd like a son," he said with a slight pout.  "I'm surrounded by girls.  Still.  And hey, a boy could be me the next generation.  Or maybe Andrew, not real sure yet."

D'Hoffryn shuddered.  "That's a horrible thought."  He snapped his fingers, handing over a sealed packet.  "That's what you wanted.  Are you ready for them now?"

"I don't know about them but I do have carseats in the van," Xander admitted.  "We can do that.  Let me call home."  He pulled out his phone, dialing one handed.  "Bri, why aren't you in bed?  No, bored isn't a good reason to be up this late on a school night.  It's a good reason to be on your bed working on a workbook.  Not up answering the phone.  Oh, your aunt is in a pissy mood and wouldn't let you read.  Okay.  Well, you know what?  You get to make her life.  Tell her D'Hoffryn is sending back three kids for you to have younger siblings."

His daughter, bless her little lungs, let out a shriek of joy that brought everyone in the house running to see what was going on.  He grinned at Dean.  "Bri's excited and she wants a brother too."  She handed the phone to Dawn.  "It's me.  D'Hoffryn's found another three that need to be brought back before they annoy hell more than I did when they were teething.  He's said one's going to be a girl.  I'm hoping for one to be a boy.  About three, hopefully potty trained.  I didn't have to get through the twins, Dawnster.  Willow had them that weekend while I was off hunting something and she did it.

"I'm not sure if she did it by magic or not, but if I found out for sure she did it by magic because she was disgusted with diapers I'd beat her ass.  She knows that so she only bragged that they were potty trained.  I did the three in Africa because diapers are kinda scarce in the middle of the desert."  He listened.  "Three.  Yup.  Please do."  He hung up.  "They'll pull out some cots for tonight.  Any other cheery news?  Like I won the lottery or something?  Because Bri eats like a full-grown slayer."

"Anya's will is about to be probated," he complained.

"She left me more than a curse in it?"

"Probably.  The other one it went to was Halfrek and she's dead too."

"Good point."  He shrugged.  "If so, I'll be happy with pictures or whatever."  He looked at the guys then at the demon.  "Any other reason you brought them out of bed tonight?  It's going to make Sam get sicker."

"It won't.  They needed warned about Lilith anyway, Harris."  He snapped his fingers and three little tykes appeared.  "There, even two boys," he said with an evil smirk.

Xander looked.  "I see Faith, I see a girl who's probably their dad, and I see....  Is that Joyce?"

"No.  She's quiet when she complains."  He disappeared.  "Have a good life."

"Yuppers.  Always do."  He felt the magic leave the kids, squatting down to look at them.  "Hey, guys, let's hit the cars?"

The little girl looked at him.  "The big idiot with the horns said you were our dad."

"Yup.  I'm Xander.  He chose me to be the dad of you three.  I've got three girls who live with me and my twins so you won't be alone, sweetie.  Okay?"  They all nodded.  "Good.  Let's hit the cars.  We'll head home, get a snack, have a nap, then we'll figure things out tomorrow."  They nodded, trooping that way.  He looked at the horrified brothers.  "If I had complained he'd have made them all infants," he said quietly.  "Or they'd be going to Buffy and that's not a good thing.  Coming with us?"  He followed the kids.  "Left."  They all went left, heading out to his van.  At least they could all fit in there.  Some little voice in the back of his head had told him to get a huge van so he had.  Fortunately.  He got them strapped in and closed the back door, looking at the brothers.  "C'mon, might as well."

"He turned our dad into a girl," Sam said.  They were too stunned to protest anything at the moment.  Freaked out too.  Their dad was now a little girl who had been wearing a flowered sundress and had her hair in pigtails.

Xander smirked.  "He's perverse that way.  D'Hoffryn isn't the nicest of demon lords but he's usually fair within his own boundaries of ethics.  They're a lot looser than anyone else's, even some other demon's, since he's over all the vengeance demons, but what he does hold as honorable he does follow."  He shrugged.  "If we're lucky, they won't have any former memories."

He walked around to get in.  "You guys can come back if you want.  If not, pop over to the bookstore after school."  He got in to drive, heading home.  The kids were drifting off in the backseat, so that was a good thing.  The dossiers he'd go over after they were magically and physically checked over by Dawn and then put to bed.  Though, he could tell Dean wanted to have a hissy fit over his dad.  They'd work that out later.  Even if she did end up being an extra scruffy biker chick some day.

***

Xander opened the back door, holding a finger against his lips.  "Napping," he said quietly.  Dawn nodded, coming out to help him get the kids inside.  Willow and Buffy were waiting.  Xander flopped down in his usual chair while Dawn looked them over by tucking them into bed.  He opened the dossiers, looking at them.  "Huh, some noisy guy that was bothering all of hell that we weren't related to.  Faith.  And a pair of hunters I met earlier's father."  He put it down.  "She's the girl because he annoyed D'Hoffryn that much," he said blandly, putting his feet up.

"Xander, that's eight kids," Willow pointed out.  He nodded slowly, making get to the point motions with his hand.  "That's way too much for anyone, especially a single parent.  Let us take the baby slayers?"

"No.  Because Lilith, who did that bad thing while I was in Africa to the pair of hunters I met earlier, is pissed at you two for the First Slayer taking down."  Buffy moaned, flopping onto the couch.  "D'Hoffryn said she's a bit modern and wants to bring down the Council.  Completely.  One of them is going to be the harbinger of future chosen ones after she tries her hand."  Two guys knocked.  "Go let Dean and Sam in."  Willow went to do that.  Sam walked in with his laptop.  "Hey."

"Hey.  They in bed?" Dean asked.

"Yup, sure are," Dawn said, bringing in a pot of coffee and a stack of cups.  "If you want sugar or milk, I'll have to find some."  She sat down once they were on the table.  "More from Anya's curse?"

"D'Hoffryn said three demons had to mark each one to have them brought back," he told her, letting her see the dossier.   "How's the research team?"

"Slow at the moment.  Why?"

"Lilith is pissed at you guys for the First Slayer thing.  She's the one that nearly got Sammy and did send me to hell," Dean told her.

"That's fucking wonderful," Dawn said, getting a swat from Willow.  "I'm old enough to swear if I'm old enough to be in medical school, Willow.  Get over it."  She went over the information they had, letting them see it and pass it to Xander.  "Okay, so now we have eight kids in the house."  Xander nodded once.  "Bri's very excited by the siblings.  She's looking forward to fussing over someone."

"If their last lives come out, Dad's seriously going to hate that," Dean told her.

Sam grinned.  "But she was so cute in her flowered sundress, Dean."

"Yeah, but if he knows, he's going to throw fits, Sammy."

Xander grinned.  "If you guys want, I can share custody of her with you.  That's not an issue.  She'll be safe here but I know that's a relation thing."  They shrugged.  "We'll work that out this weekend, especially once we see if they're going to shine through."

"No true memories, but some traits might," Dawn said.  "I checked.  Faith had none of hers that I saw.  She's stubborn though.  You could already tell he's going to be a stubborn one."

"As long as they're potty trained," Xander said dryly, cracking Buffy up.  "I ended up letting the Dracula twins bite me as a reward, Buffy.  That's how they ended up with their nickname of terror.  Oh, Ethan's looking forward to Amanda's future."

"Fat chance," Willow snorted.  "I'll trap him in a shrinking plane if I have to."

"I said I'd beat his ass," Xander told her.  "You don't have to go all magicky to solve that one."  He grinned.  She glared.  He stared her down until she wilted.  "No magic around the kids."  He looked at Dawn.  "Any other good news?"

"We need groceries?" she suggested.  "We're nearly out of cereal?"

"I noticed that.  I picked up some earlier."

"No, Bri and Amanda snuck down to get bowls when they didn't want to sleep," Willow told him.  "You're nearly out of cereal again, Xander."

"I can fix that too," he sighed.  "Guys, do we have any intel to share?"

"We have a full diary from the Lilith stuff," Sam said, handing him the laptop, open to the right file already.  Xander skimmed it then patted the nearest table until he found something and copied it off.  "Are you all right?"

"It's been a long day.  Adanne woke me up at six to make her breakfast because her stomach was growling and she had some nightmares."

"Slayer dreams?" Buffy asked.

"Nope.   Her village."

"How did you get the three mini slayers?" Dean asked.

Xander grinned.  "I was finding missing called slayers across Africa when I ran into their mothers.  Adanne and Paka's moms both died due to attacks.  Adanne's mom was a slayer who died protecting her village from some civil unrest.  Paka's mom was sent away from her village because the shaman knew there was a demon hunting baby slayers.  She died right after I killed the demon.  Adanne's mom's tribe gave me Adanne because her mother said to do that if she died protecting them.  That I'd protect them both.  Halla's village was attacked.  Her mom was a former Peace Corps member who decided to stay in the village when she fell in love with Halla's daddy.

"They defeated the inter-clan warfare going on then Halla was handed to me by her mom, right before she led the village off to find somewhere safer to live.  She told me I could train her for her destiny better and keep her safe, then didn't look back.  I had the other two with me plus an older one I found for training.  I got Halla right before I got back.  I got back and found social workers looking for me about my six-month old twin girls, Briony and Amanda."  Dean winced.  "The two older ones are seven, Halla's five.  Bri and Am are both six.  It's been wild so three more won't be much different even if two are boys."

"My son's mom kinda up and left him," Sam told him.  "Sent him to me via another hunter, who was amused to say the least.  Told us Dad would've been pissed.  Bobby's pretty cool though.  He never asked more than once.   He asked Dean and Dean told him how his mom had sent him to us to be safer."

Dean nodded.  "We have no clue how my daughter Missy came to be, but Sammy thinks she's evil incarnate now and then."

"She's a little girl.  They all are," Xander assured him.  "I can't even count how many times I've walked in to interrupt the girls from doing something that would make others scream in fear."  Dean grinned at that.  "No mom either?"

"She just appeared one night.  No idea beyond what we found as a birth certificate that listed me and no mom."

Xander smirked at him.  "That means D'Hoffyn's people were involved, Dean.  Dawn, can you check to make sure his daughter isn't a reincarnated one too?"

"Sure I can," she agreed with a smile for him.  "Usually that means someone over Lost Childhoods or something stepped in.  Or like me, they were made magically somehow."  Dean's mouth flopped open.  She gave him a smug look.  "It's not bad.  Kinda freaky at first but you get used to the idea that someone made you for a reason."

Xander nodded.  "Took us a bit but then we just shrugged it off and decided I somehow tainted her essence and that's why people want to keep her when she doesn't want to be kept."

"I haven't been kidnaped in months," she snorted, sticking her tongue out at him.

"Weeks," he countered.  "I stopped the stupid football player from taking you out and using you as a panty trophy and then probably killing you.  You do know that the cops arrested him for doing that?" he asked a bit smugly.

"I heard about that.  I gave a statement and told them you had scared him off as a good almost big brother should.  They said I was really lucky."  Her sister whimpered, covering her face with her hands.  "Cheer up, Buffy, I'm not dating anyone you would have."

"Not cute," Buffy growled at her.

"Yes I am.  All the perverts say so," she quipped back, cracking Dean up.  "See?"

Buffy looked at him.  "Want my little sister?  She's a cheap date since she doesn't drink and she doesn't eat a whole lot.  She's even house trained."

"We can't have pets," Sam said dryly.  "Motels won't let us and she'd have a hell of a time doing her education from the backseat with the kids."

"Be honest, those terrors of ours would make her read them all her assignments," Dean said dryly.   "Your son's a book nerd too, Sammy."

Sam rolled his eyes.  "He's not.  He's pretending so you don't go scare any more bullies for him, Dean."

Xander snickered quietly.  "My girls all ganged up on me and found Dawn's playcuffs the last time I broke bad on someone coming near them the wrong way.  I woke up cuffed to the bed with Bri on my chest staring at me going 'daddy, you can't get free until you quit growling at the bad men.  You're not Auntie Buffy'."  Buffy burst out cackling.  "I pointed out it was a dad's duty, not an aunt's.  She said that was fine, some day she'd make a good dad since she could growl nearly as well as Paka can.  But until then I could hit them with the taser instead of growling.  Growling made the other mommies at the park nervous."  Sam and Dean both burst out cackling at that.

Willow groaned, shaking her head.  "Your daughter's warped, Xander."

"She's my little girl," he quipped.

"So some day she'll date an Incan mummy too?" Dawn asked.

Xander shrugged.  "Don't know.  If so, we'll be ready for it."

Sam shook his head.  "You guys are so bad."

"It's experience," Willow said dryly, giving him a dirty look.  "After Sunnydale, it's all downhill from there."  She took the laptop to look over.  "I'll get the research council onto her, guys.  Plus we'll start calling around to see if anyone knows anything about her plans yet.  Maybe Lorne's heard something."  She copied it onto her own USB keydrive then left still shaking her head.

"You've got to forgive Willow.  She's a bit uptight sometimes," Dawn said with a grin.  She saw a little bit of white hair.  "Halla, I could've sworn you were in bed," she noted.

Xander leaned back to look out there.  "Come sit."  She came running out to crawl into his lap.  He grinned.  "This is Halla.  Yes, the white hair is natural.  No one's sure why but she was born with it and it doesn't like to grow longer than her ears."  He gave her a hug.  "Why're you up, sprout?"

"Wanted to see siblings," she said, looking up at him.

"They're in bed too," he told her.  "You can see them at breakfast once Auntie Dawn runs out for more cereal."

"Oooooh.  Did Bri eat like a giraffe again?"

"Yup, both twins did," Dawn assured her.  "I'll pick up some before I go to bed.  Why else are you up, Halla?"

"I wanted to make sure we weren't going to have to go live with the bigger slayers since they're all nasty and do things that make us not like them."

"What did they do this time?" Buffy asked patiently.

"Ter said my hair was  unnatural and it meant I was demonic.  Then she went to make out with her boyfriend in front of us.  It was gross, Auntie Buffy."

"I'll beat her butt tomorrow in sparring practice for you."

Halla snorted.  "It's not hard.  She trips all the time because she doesn't pay attention to her feet.  Dad taught us better already."

"He did.  I'm proud of how good you girls are," she assured her, getting a happy, beaming girl in return.  "But you should still be in bed."

"I'm not tired."

Xander poked her on the back.  "You have class tomorrow."

"Can't we stay home?" she whined.  "We need to get to know the new siblings D'Hoffryn gave us."

"How did you know about that?" Buffy asked.

"He popped in and told Adanne so she wouldn't freak out at the magic traces just after Dad left to go cemetery strolling."  She wiggled down, staring at Dean and Sam.  "I've seen you at the school.  I'm in Pre-K because of the birthday rules."

"That happens to the best of us," Dean said.  "We're Bobby and Missy's dads, Halla."

"Bri's told us about them.  She says they're pretty cool.  Even if Missy does wear really huge clothes sometimes and she pouts a lot about her hair.  Good job!"  She ran off, going back up to her room.

Xander shook his head.  "Sorry, tact isn't one of my strong points either.  Can't teach what I don't know."

Dean waved a hand.  "She's in the middle of a growth spurt so I got her bigger stuff.  Some of it is still too big on her but she wanted to wear that one.  She's always fussing with her pigtails too."

Xander nodded.  "I know that talk very well some days.  Amanda's a bit more goth than her sister but Bri's a fashionista wanna-be.  She's never satisfied if she's got any wisps of hair free."

Buffy smirked.  "We did good teaching the girls what fashion was so they don't end up wearing ugly shirts like you do."  She stood up.  "Heading home since it's not a problem.  We'll call this weekend about the Lilith thing.  Give us time to look things up and talk to people?"  They all nodded.  "Cool.  See you guys Sunday evening."  She left, going back to the center too.

Dawn shook her head.  "Sometimes Buffy's kinda clueless.  That's why she didn't realize you were watching her, Dean."  She grinned at him.  "Please hit on my sister if you want to.  She could use a good guy who wasn't afraid of demons."  Xander nodded quickly at that.  She stood up.  "Let me hit an all night grocery store for cereal and the rest of the necessary things they'll fuss for tomorrow.  Are they going to school?"

Xander considered it.  "Probably not. It's Thursday.  I'll let them go back on Monday, once we're settled again."  Dawn nodded, going to get stuff to eat for lunch too since they'd be home again.  "She moved in because she said I wouldn't turn them into Cordelia, my ex girlfriend, with her here."

"Bobby says nice things about Bri," Dean told him with a grin.  "He hates all girls but he said she was only slightly icky."

"She said he was all right for a boy thing," Xander told him, getting a laugh from Sam.  "She thinks boys are aliens for some reason.  Amanda knows that they're not, they're just strange and like mud a lot more than anyone but Adanne."

"Gardening?" Sam guessed.  "I saw the flowers."

"She and Dawn do that every single weekend," he agreed.  "Paka says it makes her nails too dirty.  Buffy tried to tell her about demon goo and slime but my poor little girls nearly passed out at the very thought of getting that messy.  They went on an 'eww' fit for over an hour and then demanded gellato to take the nasty thoughts away."  Dean was snickering quietly but shaking his head.  "Boys are so much easier."

"Trust us, we know," Sam assured him.  "Bobby's a saint compared to Missy."

"She's not that bad," Dean complained.

Xander laughed.  "Bri did say Missy was a hellion and wanted a motorcycle when she got older."

"Not while I'm around," Dean told him.  He stood up.  "Let us hit home for the night to let our sitter go to her own home?"

"Sure.  Bring the kids over tomorrow to be bored with mine if they don't make it to class."

"We can do that," Sam agreed cheerfully.  "If not, after school."  They shook hands and left him alone to check over the kids.  It was nearly midnight and he probably still had to get up in the morning to go to work.  "He seems pretty nice and decent," Sam said once they were in the Impala.

"He does.  Still freaked out about Dad?"

"Yup.  You?"

"Very.  Man, if he realizes, he's going to throw fits."  He started the engine and pulled away from the curb.  It was nice that Xander understood hunting and wasn't being pushy about stuff.  He seemed very nice and decent, but a bit wacky and warped by the hunting, the same as they were.  "Do a background on him later so we can decide about dad's custody?"

"Already started," Sam promised.  "When he had the laptop he copied a file onto it that holds a dossier from a former military project."

"Huh.  He was?  He doesn't seem former military."

"No.  It says they were studying him.  He was against their unit."

Dean tapped the steering wheel a few times.  "I heard something about a military unit being brought down for torturing demons but nothing more than rumors."

"This would be them," Sam agreed.  "I knew one of the guys in it.  I tutored him after their unit got disbanded and he took the GI Bill out."  Dean nodded once at that.  "He was really sucky in English Lit.  He got drunk one night and told me *all* about his former job and why he couldn't sleep anymore."

"He deserve it?"

"And worse."

"Where is he now?"

"He was going to be a psychology major and do therapy."

Dean shook his head quickly at that thought.  "So anything good?"

"Hunting since sixteen.  Mix of skills but they didn't know why.  Not seen as very good but always in the right spot at the right time.  Some minor planning abilities.  Have you heard anything about their group?"

"Their witch going rogue a few years back, before the town got sunk.  Rumors mostly about a hunting team that had a lot of personal stress but they still did the job.  That their slayer was dating a vamp or two.  Nothing too concrete."

"Huh."  Sam went deeper into the group's background once they got home and he could get online.   He figured they were probably doing the same thing about them.  After all, you couldn't just trust intel from any person that showed up with it.

***

Xander woke up at the sound of little footsteps in the hall, getting up to see who it was.  He smiled when he saw the confused look.  "Sauda, is there a problem?"  She jumped, turning to look at him, looking very confused.  "C'mon, we'll talk."  He let her into his room, settling them on the couch in there.  "What's up?"

"Where are we?" she asked quietly, looking around.  "I don't remember this but I seem to for some reason."

Xander petted over her dark hair.  "I'm Xander."  She nodded she knew that.  "D'Hoffryn made sure you came to me."

She blinked at him.  "I remember something about being John."

"That happens sometimes.  Dean and Sam will be in tomorrow but I can tell you that D'Hoffryn decided you needed to be reborn.  Since one of my girlfriends was his and she laid a curse to give me a family, you came to me."

"That kind of explains why I remember being John."  She looked at herself then at him.  "Now I'm a girl?"

Xander smirked at him.  "He said you're a bit stubborn and girls are always more stubborn."

"Oh."  She stared at him.  "There's other kids here."

"Yup.  Three slayers I have custody of and my twins.  Plus now you, Everett Skylar and Caleb Dillan.  You three came together."

"Wow."  She considered it.  "So what do I do with these old memories?"

"It's up to you.  You can forget some of it or not.  I'm not going to do more than help you work through any nightmares and those problems."  She relaxed.  "I'm here to be your new dad, Sauda."

"What does that mean?  I don't recognize the name."

"D'Hoffryn decided to name you an African name because I spent a good bit of time there.  It means dark beauty.  Your middle name Patrice means of noble descent.  He left clues to who you were in your names I think."

"We weren't noble."

"I think that's because something thinks Sam was."

"I almost remember that."  She scrunched up her face then let it clear up.  "Dean and Sammy are okay?"

"They're fine.  Them and their kids will be over sometime tomorrow.  Sammy's got mono so no kissing him.  Okay?"

"Eww."  She shook her head.  "This is really strange."

Xander stroked over her head again.  "It can be.  You have the chance to do what you want with this life.  While I work with slayers and the Watchers Council, I also run a bookstore.   You're more than welcome to forget that part of your past and just have a normal life this time.  That's fully up to you as you grow up."

"The memories are screaming at me about a demon.  I don't know why."

"By the rumors I've heard, they took care of the one that went after your last family.  Then another higher one came after them.  They defeated her plans but she might be back after the slayers.  You'd still be protected.  Because we have major wicca on our side.  And Dawn."

"Really?"

He nodded.  "Really.  You can ask them tomorrow.  They wanted to see if you had full memories or not."

"I don't think so.  I guess we'll see."  She yawned.  "Being little sucks."

Xander laughed.  "It gets better.  Go back to bed.  We've got to get up at eight to be at the store to open it.  You guys can hang out in the back area tomorrow with the new siblings."  She nodded, sliding off the couch and heading back to her bed.  He got up to check on the others.  Everett was having some nightmares so he stroked over his hair and whispered in his ear until he calmed down.  He smiled when the boy woke up.  "Hey.  None of those."

"What's going on?" he asked.

"Remembering things?"

"Yeah, but not many.  A redhead, sunglasses, a hummer, a gun.  How do I even know these things?"

"That's what happened before.  We'll work on those in the future.  For now, just relax and sleep."  He nodded, yawning and letting himself be tucked back in so he could go back to sleep.  He looked at the one spread out on his bed, smiling at him.  He poked Caleb on the side since it was clear he was awake.  "Same goes for you.  We've got to leave at eight to get to the store in time.  We'll talk about that stuff tomorrow night."  He nodded, blinking up at him.  "We missed you while you were gone, sweetheart."

"Xander?" he asked quietly.  He smiled and nodded.  "Why?"

"D'Hoffryn and Anya's curse."

"B know?"

"Kinda.  Not that it's you."  She relaxed.  "You're my son now.   We'll work all that out and keep the girls from pouncing you two too much.  Bri likes to sneak attack."  He tucked him back in.  "Sleep.  We'll go over this tomorrow night."  He nodded, snuggling back in to sleep.  Xander checked on the girls then went back to his own room.  He'd call the school in the morning.   Those three could be triplets.  So maybe that's the cover story he'd use for them.  That part hadn't come with the paperwork.

***

Xander walked into the school.  Dawn had the kids at the store this morning.  "Sorry, I need them at home to acclimate the new ones."

"You have a new child, Mr. Harris?" the principal asked.  "I didn't know you were dating."

He grinned.  "My ex just died and left me her trio.  Two boys and a girl."

"Are they yours?  Because that means you now have eight."

He nodded.  "I know that."

"Have you considered a vasectomy so you don't end up with more from suddenly disappearing girlfriends?"

"Only the twins are biologically mine," he said dryly.  "The other three their mothers gave me custody because they knew I'd love their daughters and protect them since their villages were attacked while I was local.  You asked that when you saw them."

"I did," she agreed.  She stared at him.  "What happened to this one's mother?"

"She died.  Car accident.  I just got them last night and was told.  So the girls are pouncing their new brothers and sister.  Bri's even gotten over her distaste of boys to pounce them.  She thinks it's good that she'll learn how to get around boys before they start trying to pick on her."

"If you say so.  Do we need to enroll them in Pre-K?"

"They're three.  They're going to start head start next week when we get all the paperwork worked out."  He grinned.  "Will the girls have any homework?  If so I need to know so I can make them do it on Sunday."

"I'll ask and fax it to the store," she promised.  He smiled and left.  "There is something odd about that family," she muttered, calling a friend in social services who could look them up for her.  Just in case her instincts weren't wrong.

***

Xander looked up as a social worker walked into the store.  "I got the new three last night."

"New slayers, Mr. Harris?" she asked with a smile.

"No.  Actually, Anya's curse.  Thankfully above potty training age."  He beamed.  "The principal asked me if I had thought about a vasectomy too."  She cackled, shaking her head.  "So anyway, need to see them?"

"Are they all right?"

"All three have some residual memories but nothing too horrible."  He pointed.  "They're being read to by Am."

"That's wonderful."  She went back there to talk to them.  She was the witch on staff and worked with the Council.  Her boss knew what the council did and why.  They knew all about the slayers being called.  She was assigned to handle any irregularities that cropped up or in case something did happen and she had to step in for one of the girls.  Though, she had never had a problem out of Harris.  He was a fussy, bouncy, hyper father that was highly overprotective and seriously scary when bad people or things came near his kids.  "Hi, girls, and boys."

"Miss Heller," Paka said with a smile.  "Look, new nail polish."  She showed off her nails.

"That's a very pretty color, Paka."  She smiled and patted the girl on the head.  "Someone asked me to come check on the three new kids to make sure they're all right with their new home."  She sat down, looking at them.  "I'm Miss Heller.  I'm a social worker but I handle whatever happens at the Council, kids.  So if you have problems you can talk to me."

Xander leaned in.  "She knows, guys.  She's seen the senior slayers in action."  Caleb stiffened.  He grinned.  "She ran into Buffy on patrol.  That's Caleb, Everett, and Sauda."

"That's a beautiful name."  She smiled at the little girl, who was staring back.  "I'm not a mean one.  I'm not scary.  I'm not here to cause problems.  The state said we had to look in on this issue when so many girls from outside the country ended up in the same building."  She nodded at that.  "That's why I'm here.  That and the school's principal was being a bit paranoid."

"Suddenly appearing kids can do that," Halla agreed calmly.  "Does she know?"

"I told her those three were triplets and their mom had a car accident," Xander told them.  That got a mass nod.  They could go with that story.  "That she was my ex.  There's been any number of those and it's good enough."  He helped the social worker up.  "Any problems you see?"

"Get the boys their own clothes?" she told him.

"Going to tonight.  For today they can wear hand-me-down shirts.  Dawn's handling that."

"That's fine."  She pinched him on the cheek, earning a smile.  "You'll do your ususal wonderful job, Xander.  I know you will."  She left, going to make notes.  They were adorable!  Very healthy looking too.

He looked down at them.  "The Watchers Council is well known by some who need to," he admitted at the curious looks.  "It's cool.  The principal doesn't think that men should be single dads.  Go back to the books and I'll be out here doing the monthly receipts."

"Homework?" Paka asked.

"You're the only kid I know who looks forward to homework," Adanne complained.

Xander looked at the girls.  "It's people like her who keep the store in business and you guys in cereal.  Quit picking on your sister because she likes to study.  She can be as brilliant as she wants to be.  The same as you can."  He stared her down.  "And I would suggest that you do spend some time.  Remember, report cards come soon, guys."  They groaned.  "And I do give treats for good grades."  They pulled out their school books, reading them to the new kids instead.  He grinned, going back to the register.  A new customer came in.  "Welcome to the Dimension of Books.  Let me know if you need help finding anything."

"Romances?" the older woman asked.  He pointed.  "Thank you."  She went to browse.

Xander went back to his receipts.  He'd had a pretty good month.  Dean and Sam walked in with their two kids in tow.  He pointed at the back room.  "They're doing homework because I give treats for good grades and it's nearly report card time," he said with a manic grin.

Dean looked around then grinned back when he spotted the customer.  "That's always a nice thing.  We take the kids out to the circus pizza place for good grades."

Xander pointed behind him where the last ones were hung.  "C's get a candy bar.  B's get a special dinner.  A's get a small mall certificate so they can pick up something they want at the toy store or somewhere."

"You're much more liberal than we are," Sam said with a grin.  "Hi, kids.  We didn't get to see most of you guys last night.  I'm Sam, this is Dean.  We're Bobby and Missy's dads."

"We know Bobby and Missy," Bri said, making room for them.  "Dad's bribing us soon," she said with a grin.

"Report cards come out in three weeks," Sam told her.

She stuck her tongue out.  "We've got to go shopping."  She gave him an evil smirk.  The other girls cackled at that.

Xander looked that way.  "You guys can be babysat while I take the younger three," he called.  That stopped that joy.  He smirked at Dean.  "It's the torture of having so many girls."

Dean snickered.  "Probably, yeah."

"Daddy, since the stuff we outgrew went to AnnaBeth, does that mean you need to go to Baby Gap?" Adanne called.

"You know very well I only go into the Gap when your Aunt Buffy drags me, Adanne.   Hopefully she's hitting there today so I don't have to.  That way I can hit the other place that I like better."  Dean shuddered.  "That's how I feel.  But they have five or six shopping aunties so I don't have to buy too much for them."  The customer giggled at that.  He grinned.  "They do.  It's good.  Oh, boys, if Buffy say she's going to turn you into a gay shopping buddy, just tell her clothes are evil and watch her turn purple.  She'll try to pick on you about that at least once.  She did me."

Dean shook his head.  "You're insane," he said dryly.

"Now and then," he said with a manic grin.  "It's being surrounded by girls."

Dean patted him on the back.  "Let us look at kid books for our two heathens."  Xander pointed at the shelves and rack of used books.  "Thanks, dude."

"Welcome."  He went back to his receipts while Sam went in to read to the kids.

"Wow, a boy thing that likes books," Amanda said in awe.  Dean burst out giggling at that pronouncement.  "He is!" she defended, huffing at him.

"He is, princess.  He was reading Lord of the Rings at about your age."

"You did good teaching me to read so I'd quit asking you what things were," Sam said with a grin.

"Then Dad got pissed because the back of the car looked like a library had exploded some days."

"Did not," he complained.

"Did so," he shot back.  "When you got into it, you had six and seven books all around you and on the floor of the car.  He hated library trips, Sammy.  Said it gave him his weight lifting for the week."

"At least I always returned mine," Sam defended.

"Even if Dad did have to mail a few back because you weren't done with them," he shot back.  "Remember, you're not too old for me to toss over my lap and spank, Sammy."

"Yes I am.  I'm taller than you are, Dean."

"Guys, no spanking in here.  Spanking is done about three blocks to the left and up one to the north," Xander said dryly.  "Let's not scare off my customers."

The older woman giggled.  "They're adorable and it's nice that they can still play with each other."

Dean grinned.  "Thank you."  He winked and she blushed, tittering some as she picked out some books.

"School holiday?"

"A free day due to appointments and stuff."  He smiled.  "Needed anything you couldn't find?  We do order for our good customers."

"I found enough for the next month.  Then I'll be back for more."  She paid and let him bag them up, sliding a new bookmark into each.  She smiled at that and left the store.  She could tell all her friends about the cute children the nice guy at the bookstore had.  They were adorable.

Xander looked around then at Dean.  "Back that way and to the right is the supply and research room," he said quietly.  "I keep it locked but the key's under the register."  That got a nod.  "In case it's needed.  Small herb stash for rituals and things."

"Gotcha.  That's good to know.  Used books are expensive."

Xander looked.  "That's original price, Dean.  The used price is the bottom one."  Dean nodded, letting his little girl come out to make sure he was getting good ones.

"Daddy, I want one on horses," she pouted.  She blinked her big blue eyes at him.  "Please, Daddy?"

"There's a kick ass older series about a pony club," Xander told her.  "But you've got to prove you can read it for me to show your dad where it is."  She glared at him.  He grinned.  "There's like ten of them.  They're older girl books."

She considered it.  "Are they cheap?  Daddy doesn't like spending too much money."

Xander nodded.  "They're not bad.  About the same price."  He walked her back to the right rack, letting her see.  "All this series is pony club girls.  That one's babysitting girls.  That one's vampire girls.  And that one's scary books."  He looked at her.  She gave him an amused look.  "The vampire and scary ones aren't bad for being completely wrong but they're a decent read.  I don't let books I wouldn't read to my kids in here."

She looked at the first pony club book.  "It's got some bigger words."

"But learning bigger words means you're smarter.  Prove you can read the first page to your dad and I'll let him have that one for the same price as a used one."

She bounced back to her dad, making him sit down by pushing him down.  Then she climbed into his lap to read him the first page.  She wanted to be a big girl.  She was a big girl now, she should have big girl books.  Dean listened, helping with a few words when she got stuck.  "Good job, princess.  You can have that one."  She beamed at him.  "We'll work on it at bedtime."  She squealed and hugged him, taking it up to the counter.  Dean got a few others that Bobby might like, letting Sammy see and nod his approval.  Xander handed him another one.  "Boy book?"

"Yup.  About dinosaur hunters.  It's a local favorite but a bit higher so he can have a big boy book too."

"That's pretty cool."  He put it in the stack.  Xander rang it up and let him pay.  "Need any help around here?  Sammy's starting to get better."

"Dawn's had to pull back some of her hours thanks to medical school.  I could work out with some part time help."  That got a nod.  "I know you guys travel a lot."

"Yeah, but like Dad did, we'll have to stay around now and then for school stuff.  It sucked always being the new kid every few months."

"So hunt outside of the area and move every few years," Xander suggested.  "With the hellmouth here, it's not like we don't have plenty to do.  Plus most of the current slayers are heading off to oversea assignments in the next few months."

"That could help.  Thanks, Xander."

"Welcome, Dean.  I'm a nice guy."  He leaned on the counter.  "They have a few bleed through memories but not that many," he said quietly.  "She was a bit confused last night but something was prompting a worry about the demon that was originally after you guys.  I told her you two got it and she went back to bed."

"I'll talk to her later," he promised.  "You're pretty good at this."

"I need to be for mine.  I've got three slayers I've got to get ready.  Oh, girls, weapons safety lessons this weekend.  So we'll be at the Council."

"Yes, Dad," they all sighed.

"Can Bobby and Missy come?" Bri called.

"That's up to their daddies," Xander called back.  He shrugged at Dean.  "I've got to go over sharp and pointy lessons and weapons safety with the girls.  I do it once a month in case they forget.  Because they sometimes do.  Plus some hunting drills and things."

"We might show up for that.  Right now I think we've got a ghost to deal with on Sunday night."

Xander leaned closer.  "Some of the shopping aunties are slayers who babysit cheaply, Dean."  He grinned at that.  Xander leaned back with a grin of his own.  "I nearly never have to shop for anything except food and new shoes for them.  All their school shopping was done by the aunties who wanted a vacation in the mall."

"That's gotta help."

Paka came out with a huff.  "Daddy, I messed up my nails."

He looked at it.  "We'll redo them tonight."  She pouted.  He stared back.  "Instantly being redone can't happen.  We don't have any polish remover.  Ask your aunts when they show up later.  They might have some."  She nodded, picking at the stuff that had gotten messed up before going back in there.  "It's amazing how girly they can be sometimes."

"It means they're normal girls I guess.  Missy wanted nail polish but we had to talk her out of it."

"Oh, I'm sure they'll fix that sometime soon," Xander said dryly.  "My little fashion plates won't let any girl go if they think she needs it.  They started to help another girl in the class who didn't like doing her hair and things recently.  Bri sat her down on the playground to brush and braid it for her."  Dean laughed.  "Seriously.  The teacher sent home a note that they were torturing the other girl by doing her hair for her.  I think your two made sure she stayed still."

"Kids, are we torturing the others with makeovers?" Dean called.  Sam gave him an odd look.

"She needed to learn how good having her hair done felt, Daddy," Missy called.  "Bri braids really well."

Sam moaned, shaking his head.  "Ask, don't force things on others."  They all sighed but nodded.  Sometimes he had funny ideas, Missy had told them that.

"I'm not sure if they're the bad influence or it's someone else," Dean decided.

"Our kids are badasses because we are, Dean," Xander assured him with a pat on the shoulder.  "They'll have to take over our callings some year and by then the demons will fear them like they're worse than we ever could be."

"True.  We can train them in all the little things we had to learn on the job," Dean agreed.

Sam looked at him.  "Hunting training after puberty, guys."

Halla poked him on the arm and smiled.  "Does that mean they can't come have handling sharp and pointy thing lessons with us this weekend?  The bigger girls never spar with us because they're afraid we'll whoop their butts because they're not paying enough attention. It'd be nice to spar with someone our own age.  Even if Dad can't go out to find more young slayers anymore."

"We'll see," Sam told her.  "If they want to."  She beamed and hugged his arm then went back to her homework and teaching Bobby how to multiply.  He and Dean shared a look.  The young slayers were seriously strange but it was good that they were being trained already.

"Ladies," Xander called.  "And boys.  I can see Auntie Buffy coming up the street."  The older girls all squealed and put up their books to go pounce her.  She came in with them chattering around her.

"I found the absolute most cute outfits," she said proudly, pulling one out.

"Um, Buffy?  Boys?" he suggested.

She waved a hand.  "I didn't know what sizes they wore so I'll take them later."  She beamed.  "That way I can make sure they don't like fashion disasters like their new daddy does."  She walked into the back, looking at the two new kids.  "Are you two Xander's too?  I didn't know he snuck in a few more."

"They're ours," Sam said with a smile.

"Oh, hi.  Didn't notice you lounging there looking kinda adorable with a kid's book, Sam."  She patted him on the head before stepping over him and plopping herself down. "What're we doing today, kids?"

"Homework.  It's nearly time for bribes," Adanne said happily.

"I wish my mom had been so generous with our bribes for good work.  I might've tried harder."

"So I take it you ignored your job interview today?" Xander called from the counter.

"No!  I went but it wasn't good."  She shrugged at the hugs the girls gave her.  "Paka, what did you do to your nails?"  She picked up her hand to look at the ruined polish job.  "Hmm, still wet?"

"No, the book gave it a papercut.  Daddy doesn't have any polish remover."

She checked her purse.  "Me either.  Just the emergency polish pen for touch ups before my interview."  She got up to look in the bathroom.  The girls had all put a basket of necessary girl stuff in there.  "Ah-ha!  One of us did put a small jar of polish remover in here."  She brought it back.  "This works by sticking your finger in there and rubbing it against the sponges."

Paka did that, wincing some.  "It stings too."

"It can on the paper cuts.  That's why we use the cotton ball method most of the time."  She let her undo all her nails since her polish pen wouldn't match what she was wearing.  Then she dried them off and started on the clean fingernails.  "You do very good not biting them, Paka."

"I try really hard even if now and then they do sneak into my mouth," she said with a sheepish grin.

Halla patted her on the back.  "We remind you when we catch you."

Adanne nodded.  "We do.  Can you do mine too, Auntie Buffy?  And Missy's?  She's never had hers done because she only has a dad and he doesn't understand girl things are necessary for girls."

"Sure, I can do that," she said happily, getting back to work on their nails.  Missy wiggled until she gave her a grin.  "Sit still.  Don't want me to paint the fingers too, Missy."  She sat still, watching what she did very carefully.

Bobby got up with a huff of noise.  "C'mon, Caleb and Everett.  We'll do boy things.  Girl things are nasty unless you like smelling nail polish."  They got up to follow him out into the main store.  Dean gave him a one-armed hug from where he was reading a new paranormal journal.  "Are there any guy things to do?"

"Only if you want to go polish swords and the girls might want to help," Xander said, turning the page on his own book.  "Unless you want to help me unpack and tag the new box of books I've been ignoring because they're all romances?"

"I can help with that.  Dean's the weapons nut in the family," Sam offered.  Xander tossed Dean a key, letting him catch it with the magazine.  "Thanks, guys."

"Welcome.  Never too early to start these lessons for safety reasons."  He led them back to the supply room, unlocking the door and finding the light switch before letting them inside.  He closed the door behind them, looking at the very plain room with only a table.  "Huh."  He checked around again, finding another light switch.  He flipped it and the illusion fell, making them all moan in pleasure.

"He has more books than Uncle Bobby does," Bobby said in awe.

"He does," Dean agreed.  "And in more languages too," he said, spotting a whole shelf next to him in other languages he couldn't read.  "Weapons are where?"

"There's a trunk there," Caleb said with a point.  "And there's another thingy in the back."  He walked that way, opening the small hidden door.  "This is so the girls couldn't get into it."  He grinned.

"Memories of before?" Dean guessed.  She beamed and nodded.  "That's cool.  How about you, Everett?"

"I don't think I remember anything like this."  He looked at the books.  "I have no idea why it's got a tentacle wrapped around it."

Caleb shrugged.  "Who knows."  He crawled into the small space, opening the bigger door.  Dean walked in and moaned, nearly falling to his knees.  "See?"

"Wow."  He walked over to check out what was hidden back there.  "This is so awesome."

Xander strolled in and leaned over his shoulder.  "Caleb!"

"What?" he defended, starting to pout.

"Show off the more mundane weapons, dear.  The ones behind the bookcases."  He came out to move them on their tracks, showing the swords and other weapons that they usually used.  "Sorry, apocalypse vault," he said with a sheepish grin.

"I totally understand that need after the background check we did on your group, dude," Dean assured him.   He came out to look them over.  "This one has some rust, Xander."

"That one was on the bottom of a lake until about three weeks ago.  I've been slowly getting it clean.  It's time for another steel wool treatment if you wanted to.  If not, the others could use cleaned.  Stuff's in the trunk."  He closed that one door and then left them alone.  He had heard the door bell's jingle.  "Hi, welcome to Dimension of Books," he said with a smile.  "Sorry, I was in the back.  What can I do for you two today?  Sci-fi?  Horror?"

"Money," one said, pulling a knife.  Xander sighed and put his gun on the counter, under his hand.  He was a bit unnerved by the one-eyed stare he was getting.  He slowly started to back up.  "Yo, just a prank, dude.  Really!"  They turned and fled.

"Oooh, can we hunt?" Adanne asked, bouncing up and down.

"You'll mess up your nails," Missy said primly.

"Pounce and tie up only, with Buffy supervising," he ordered.  They ran out, Buffy behind them.  "Before they really hurt someone."  Sam gave him an odd look.  "The neighborhood cops know the girls.  They pounced someone trying to rob the bakery a few months back.  Then Halla asked one of the guys if she could help him type his reports.  They adore my girls."  He grinned when they all came back in and Buffy had to redo a few nails.  "They that tough?"

Buffy snorted.  "Hell no, got scared of little girls.  You've got a good avenging army, Xan."  She beamed at the girls.  "We should go over how to pounce again this weekend."  They all nodded at that.  Missy pouted at her.  "If your dads let you, sweetheart."  She gave her a quick hug.

Missy pouted at her uncle.  "Can we go take pouncing lessons, Uncle Sam?  Please?" she begged.

"Your dad and I will talk about it later," he said firmly, not looking at her.  She had learned Dean's begging looks all too well.  She came over to hug him around the waist, staring up at him, eyes moist and lips sticking out.  "Don't do that," he complained.  "That's worse than me pouting at Dean when we were younger."

"Daddy said I pout so good so I can be payback for all the ice cream you stole off him that way," she said with a slight grin.  "Can we please go with them?"

"We'll talk about it later."

"Fine.  You don't love me."

Sam glared at her, making her shrink down some.  "If I didn't, I wouldn't give you anything when you beg, Missy, and I'd make you wear scratchy clothes instead of washing them, plus I wouldn't feed you.  So don't start that.  Ever.  Am I clear?"

"Yes, Uncle Sam.  I'm sorry."  She gave him another hug then went back to learn more about being a real girl who was a bit naughty and could kick butt like her daddy did from this nice blonde lady who apparently did the same thing her dad and uncle did.  "Can Mr. Xander hunt?" she asked.  "I've never seen another hunter with an eye patch."

"Just because he only has one eye doesn't mean he's helpless, Missy.  It means he's got a weakness on that side, but Xander's not like everyone else.  See, Xander's really able to do more than we let him do, but we don't want him to be hurt so we don't let him.  It's a complicated thing."

"But can he hunt?"

"He can," Halla agreed.  "He's the one who teaches us slayers how to hunt."  Buffy nodded.  "He's very good at hunting things."  She smiled.  "Only having one eye means that he pays more attention to that side.  We know it's been a long night if we can sneak up on him on that side and he doesn't catch us.  Usually he does."

Missy smiled at Xander then at them.  "Are there other hunters who're hurt like him?"

"I don't know much about your daddy's type of hunters, but there is one slayer who's now in a wheelchair.   She kinda hurt her back a lot last year.  We don't let her hunt but we do let her use her skills in other ways and she's retraining to help us by doing other necessary things for us.  It all depends on how hurt and what they used to do.  Just because they have a weakness doesn't mean they can't do stuff.  It took me a long time to learn that one and Xander kicking my butt a few times too."

"Wow.  Do you think he can beat Daddy?"

"I don't know.  I've never seen him fight," Buffy said honestly.  "Maybe we'll invite your daddies over to spar this weekend.  The girls could use new sparring partners too."

"That would mean we'd get to have sharp and pointy lectures too?" Missy asked, pouting at her.  Pouting usually got her what she wanted.

"You're damn good at that," Buffy said dryly.  "Nearly as good as Xander is at pouting."

"Missy, no pouting or you're grounded all weekend," Sam called.

"Sorry," she said with a grin.

"We'll ask and nag your daddies into it, princess.  Every girl should be able to kick butt.  If only so she can shoo boys off her when she's older."  She got up and went to talk to Dean.  "Missy wants you guys to come spar with the slayers this weekend so she can have sharp and pointy lessons.  Can they?"

Dean looked at her.  "We'll think about it.  We'd like to keep the kids from hunting until they're older."

"Something we had to learn the hard way, Dean.  Things come for the families very easily."  Dean nodded once at that.  "I don't know how many times things came for Dawn because of me.  Xander was teaching her self defense behind my back because he knew but couldn't make me see it.  I was in my butthead phase."

Dean snickered quietly.  "Can't imagine that one, Buffy.  I think weapons safety is good at their present ages but I think it'd be more handy to have more defense and running away than pouncing and fighting lessons."

"Sure, we can do that.  That's what Xander gives his girls anyway.  None of us want the mites of terror out there in a real battle unless we're all dead and it's coming after them.  We just have to plan in case it does happen."

"I get that.  Things have come after all of us over the years."  He looked up at her, grinning some.  "It'll be okay.  We can come help."

She beamed.  "Thanks, Dean."  She gave him a hug.  "You're not bad for being older and so damn tall."  She bounced out to talk to Sam, who was even taller.

Dean shook his head.  "Some of the other hunters would be very amused by her," he told Bobby, who nodded.

"Uncle Bobby would think she was too tiny but I'm sure she's really good at it since she's lasted this long."

"Slayers are special," Caleb told him.  "They have special skills and stuff.  Halla explained that to us earlier when she lifted the end of my bed up to show off."

"Interesting to know," Dean agreed.  He patted them all on the head.  "Finish up and we'll hit lunch, kids.  You can help me pick up some."  They cheered and got back to work.  There was a burger place up the street that would do.  They came out, relocking the door once everything was closed up and rehidden.  He handed Xander the keys.  "Lunch?"

Xander winced.  "Let me get the girls'.  They eat like wild animals at times," he said quietly.  He handed him a fifty from the drawer.  "The grocery place on the next corner up has a good deli.  Tell them you're feeding my girls and they'll give you what they usually give us.  Get you guys something and it'll be good."  Dean nodded, walking out with the guys.  The girls were back to doing scary girl things with their hair.  They didn't want to interrupt it.

Sam grinned.  "We could have."

"The mini slayers in there can eat more than their fair share.  I've seen Buffy close down buffets, Sam.  There's a reason the Council has a really high food budget."

"I heard that," Buffy complained.

"Dean's going to the grocery store for food, guys."

The girls all cheered.  They were getting hungry too.

***

Dean sat down, watching the slayers warm up.  It was truly an army of tiny girls who looked so innocent and delicate.  Until the first one got a split lip and then tackled the pouncer while pulling her hair.  Cat fights had nothing on those two.  And Xander calmly walked out and pushed them apart, glaring at them until they apologized and got back to their warming up routine.  "Fighting over a boy?" he teased when Xander came closer.

"Xanria took the last twinkie in the building and she has PMS.  All it takes is a funny look," he said dryly.  "Girls, we have visitors as I'm sure you've noticed.  These are Dean and Sam Winchester.  They hunt demons too," he announced.  They all stared and a few started to drool.  "They're here to spar with you ladies, and I do expect you to be ladies," he said, glaring at the droolers.  "They have two mini-terrors of their own in Bri's class.  Do not damage them but they can probably give as good as you can.  Fair warning."  He got out of the way.  "Free for all!"  The girls pounced the new guys to test them out.  Just because they were sitting down didn't put them at too much of a disadvantage.  Sam was quickly out of his chair and battling against two of the girls, yelping when one pinched him.  "Do it again, Mel.  Watch me spank," Xander warned.

"Sorry," she said cheerfully, smiling at him and then trying to knock him down with her usual teammate.

Dean was surrounded but the girls were playing nice.  He looked at Xander who only smirked and waved a hand.  "You sure?"

"They'll face tougher vamps than you, Dean.  Don't do permanent damage."  He nodded and took a swing at one.  She squealed as she ducked and they fought harder.  Dean and Sam ended up against each other but a few of the slayers had been pulled out for being down too long.  Xander watched.  The girls weren't great.  This was the younger class anyway.  Barely cleared for field duties.  Dean got knocked down by one and sat on until Xander declared him out.  Sam decked one of the girls and the last two girls knocked him down with a tackle, holding him down too.  "Hold," Xander called.  He grinned at them.  "They're not bad for barely being out of training.  This is the lighter class by the way."  He helped the last few up, checking for injuries.  "Not bad.  Not great, but not bad.  Went half an hour."  He considered it.  "Shower, change, do katas before the ice cream and no hitting on Dean or Sam unless you're over the age of consent and reason."  They pouted but did as he said.

"They're how old?" Dean asked, watching them all leave.

"All under seventeen," he said with a grin.  "They're the junior class of terrors of the underworld.  The upper one is Buffy's job to spar with unless I feel they're slacking off, which they haven't been this week.  I think one's nearly seventeen so she might try to come back and hit on you guys."

Dean gaped.  "How on earth?"

"Slayers are chosen and given gifts, Dean.  The ability and knowledge of how to fight, strength, speed, faster healing, all that stuff.  That's so they can do their jobs.  When Willow opened the calling up to all of them for the First Evil battle, every one of them down to my girls got gifted.  They have to train it.  Or else they're in danger.  There were plenty of them hunting the girls that didn't make it to Sunnydale while we were searching for them.  That's how I got Paka."  He shrugged.  "They have to be trained as soon as possible and given ethics lectures so they know it's not a 'kill anything that looks creepy' duty."

"They're really good," Sam said, rubbing at his split lip.  "Ice packs?"

"Freezer there," he said with a point at the built-in mini fridge.  Sam got them both ice packs.  "I don't spar with this group because I will trash them if they try me like they did you.  I learned the hard way, by having it attack me.  They're learning better by training."

"Not bad," Dean agreed.  "Probably could've lasted longer and worked closer together."

"The problem is that slayers are meant to be single girls out fighting so they don't always work well with others helping.  We found that out with Buffy.  The slayer essence that activates them leads them to want to hunt alone.  Buffy can turn into a real bitch when it starts poking her now and then.  Some of them have been in training by the old Council since they were little but most of them didn't start training until Sunnydale fell in.  I'm proud of the girls.  They're doing better.  They're learning what teamwork is too.  It'll save them more than any other gift they have."

Dean nodded.  "It can.  The older ones?"

"All vicious when it comes to it.  Most of them are overly trained or have been in combat for years now.  Senior team girls go out in pairs on nightly patrols.  The younger crew adds a member or two each night to back them up and to get some on-the-job training from their experience once they're passed into the field.  All of the senior girls would have pinched you to distract you and then beaten your ass until you were staring up at them sitting on your chest with a wicked smirk.  That's why I let the younger ones have you."

"Sensible and saving Sammy's butt," Dean agreed.  "They're good."

"They still need experience and weapons work.  But they're not bad.  Some day my terrors will be in that group too."  He led them off to the range.  "That's our present weapons master.  He's a douche," he said quietly.  "But he knows what he's doing with them."  They nodded at that.  "We agreed that the girls would be exposed to every single weapon but he's an ancient weapons specialist since we use them most often.  Can you guys teach guns?"

"I can," Dean agreed.  "I'm damn good at it actually."

Xander whistled, drawing attention.  "Peter, this is Dean and Sam Winchester.  They're demon hunters.  They're more shotgun and handgun oriented.  Let Dean teach the girls."

"Sure, Xander.  Show your stuff, Winchester.  Our guns are in the blue cabinet.  I stocked easy to carry, conceal in skimpy clothes, and lightweight ones."  He sat down, letting Dean look over the weapons then stand in front of the girls.

Dean stared at them, then looked at Sammy.  Then back at them.  "Our family started hunting when I was four and Sammy was six months old," he said calmly.  "Our dad taught us and then we learned more on the job and from other hunters."  They nodded.  "We can help you learn what we have."  He smiled, pulling out a gun.  "This isn't a bad model of gun.  Fairly light for a guy my size but since most of you girls are smaller it should be good in your hand.  How many have practiced in the last month on the range?"  A few raised their hands.  He looked at the weapons master.  "No drills?"

"Supposedly.  Most of the girls don't understand guns.  We're more used to swords and crossbows."

Dean nodded once at that.  "I can get that."  He moved up to put the gun in the overhead projector that would show what he was doing.  He went over each part, how to break it down and clean it.  He ignored the two girls in the front who were wiggling as he talked about the proper method to clean the inside of the barrel.   If they got wet over guns, he wouldn't mind.  It'd be good for them.  Then he took them to the range, helping each one learn where her center of gravity for firing was at and how to best aim around their breasts since they did get in the way on girls.  Thankfully he knew how Ellen and other females hunted.  Sam  pulled a few out to go over what he was with the rest of the group.  They needed more help.  And a few were drooling on his baby brother but it was good for his ego.

***

Dean and Sam collapsed at Xander's later that night, staring at the younger guy.  He was Sammy's age but it seemed like today had been another day at the store for him.  The kids were all in bed, worn out beyond any nightmares that might come.  Dean was ready to collapse.  He had spent the time before dinner sparring with the younger crew again.  They were good but he had made a few fight together instead of their usual ones.  It got them thinking more strategically about who they'd want at their back in various situations.  Sammy had went over the Lilith information with the research council.  It wasn't looking good.  "So now what?" Dean asked finally.

Xander shrugged.  "We can wait for her plan to manifest.  We know what she's planning basically.  One of her minions likes to drink at a bar where one of the older girls temps as a bartender.  We know she's in town.  The whole Council is behind taking her out."

"Small problem, we don't have a weapon that can."

"The slayer scythe can," Xander told him simply.  Dean and Sam had both been shown it and told about the battle with the First when they had asked.  Buffy had told them.  "I think we need to small team it but Buffy wants to go in en masse.  We're having a present disagreement about that.  I do know that Dawn found a mention of innocent's blood being needed for some reason.  I think that's part of another prophecy though.  Not real sure and neither was she.  She was decoding it earlier."

Sam leaned forward.  "It's a later prophecy and it looks like it's about Caleb regaining his memories.  I was helping her with it before the information meeting."

"What happens if she does take down this Council?" Dean asked.

"Not everyone's here this time.  We're warned so we've taken the precautions we put into place after the First blew up the old council.  We already have girls overseas and in a lot of troubled areas here in the US.  The younger girls are here for training until we farm them off to another site."  That got a slow nod from Sam.  "Technically you just saw about ten percent of our people, guys.  Even if she takes out the building and goes after us, we've got alert systems ready.  There's plenty of things that come after slayers.  All but my three because they're protected by D'Hoffryn."

Dean licked his lips.  "Why?  I remember you said your ex was one of his, but was he hers too?"

"No.  D'Hoffryn and I made a deal when we had Anya as a human.  I'd quit trying to hurt them for hurting her.  He'd leave me alone and make sure I wasn't as...attuned to demons as before.  See, I'm a medium," he said, shifting some.  "I've been possessed a few times and kept the memories of them."

"I've been possessed but didn't keep any memories," Sam admitted.

"I kept skills and memories, plus I'm also fairly filled with former hellmouth energy.  Which freaked everyone out when we got to Cleveland and the thing tried to open to hug me on my first patrol next to it.  Caused no ends of fits until Dawn finally figured out it was an energy signature.  I sucked up so much of the old hellmouth's energy that it's tainted me to the point where I feel like Sunnydale to everything that can read it."  They both nodded more slowly, paying a lot of attention.  "Which is how I kinda almost destroyed a few demon realms during colic and teething times."

"I nearly destroyed a few demon realms.  If you've got magic or something I'm sure it was worse," Sam admitted.

"Oh, I don't have it, it just kinda loves me and likes to snuggle up around me.  I draw in energy like I do spirits.  So while Willow has some energy, I have a lot more than all the others who lived there do.  It tends to come out in wacky ways.  D'Hoffryn made a deal that I'd quit doing things that would upset the whole demon hierarchy before bigger demons came to take us out for upsetting them and he'd mask my signature a bit.  Then with Anya's curse enacted it made him responsible for overseeing my kids' upbringing to make sure I wouldn't warp them too far against all demons."

He grinned sweetly.  "Anya knew my kids would be given a choice but they'd see the hunting and might take it too far.  This way they got a more balanced view.  Which means that all my kids look like they're protected by D'Hoffryn.  Even the mini slayers upstairs.  I can't usually use it to any advantage but it means nothing short of Lucifer is going to attack this house.  Lilith trying would get D'Hoffryn in her face and he's the Lord of many higher demons.  And a lot more owe him favors.  I'm strategically unsound to attack."

"But the main building isn't."

"Slayers are a target.  We all know this.  Watchers are a target too.  All Lilith could do to me is take out the store.  And if she tries, the apocalypse vault I have for my own fun will take half the block if not more of it."  Dean nodded quickly at that.  "Again, strategically unsound since all demons know I'm the slayers' gear guy.  I have been since I hit a military base to get Buffy something she needed way back when for her seventeenth."

"Wow.  I thought that was a rumor," Dean said.

"Nope.  It was a nice date though," he offered with a grin.  "One of my better ones."  A woman appeared in a flowing blue cloak.  She landed on the floor with a soft thump and moved the hood out of her way, showing her light blue antennas and pale green skin.  "Hey, sweetie.  These are Dean and Sam.  Bri's talked about her friends Missy and Bobby, they're their dads."

She looked at Sam, bowing slightly.  "I heard."

"She's back," he said grimly.  "Mad at the slayers."

She looked at Xander.  "She is?"

"Got a head's up from the big guy.  We know, we're working on it."

"Huh.  Any other news?"

"D'Hoffryn sent back three more souls that needed to be reborn, mostly to make them quit tearing up hell with their complaining.  We finally have sons, dear," he finished with a grin.

She shuddered.  "You know there's a prophecy about you being freed of your enslavement by the girls who surround you, right?"

"No, I hadn't.  Good or bad?"

"Massive attack that can take down the slayer line."

"Huh.  Maybe that's what's going on then.  Got any idea where we can find a copy?"

She sighed.  "I'll find one for Dawn.  Is she back?  I need a cut looked at."

"Not yet.  She's in happy researcher mode.  Want me to?"

"You pull too tightly when you do stitches, Xander.  Hell no."

Dean coughed.  "Sammy and I can both stitch, ma'am."

"Guys, this is B'letta.  She's my lady."

"Charmed."  She looked at them.  "Do you pull very hard?  We have very sensitive skin."

"I don't," Sam said.  "Dean says I make mine too loose."

"Please do then."  She took off her cloak and halter top to show off her sports bra and a long cut down her back.  They all hissed.

Xander looked then at her face.  "Fistion demons again?"

"They're still pissing off my clan in that trade dispute.  Pity."

He shrugged.  "They're slime suckers and not really nice.  Plus they don't read.  I don't like demons that don't read books."

She patted him on the face.  "You don't like them if they don't read comics either, dear.  Get me some ice?"  He nodded, going to do that.  She looked at Sam.  "Don't you dare bring more danger to him and our children."

"I'm not trying to.  Unless they catch the mono I'm getting over.  D'Hoffryn told us both about Lilith at the same time.  When he decided our dad had to come back as a girl."

She burst out laughing.  "He is?"

Xander came back.  "Sauda is very nice but very stubborn already.  She didn't want Buffy to put her in a dress," Xander said, handing over the ice pack.  "She has funny ideas of cute too according to our shopping aunties.  But she relented and got her jeans and stuff so she's comfy.  They have very few memory spikes.  Caleb seems to have more from his time as Faith."

"The slayer Faith?" she asked impatiently.  He grinned and nodded.  "Who else?"

"A guy who needed a second chance and was kicking himself.  He's kinda important in the future so D'Hoffryn threw him in too."

"Wonderful!"

"He's a sweet boy," he said firmly.  "Leave them alone so they quit remembering so  hard."

"I will, Xander."  She stroked his cheek.  "Any other good news beyond my clan has grown?"

"Just that," he said with a grin.  "Dean and Sam have kids in Bri's class so we gave them safety lectures earlier.  I let the barely cleared ones pounce them for fun."

"I taught some gun lessons," Dean agreed.  "Handgun and shotgun."  He helped Sammy stitch her back, not noticing she didn't hiss or flinch at any of them.  Maybe it was her species or because she was an assassin.  Some sort of training.  "Xander, if things hit south of the border here, what's going to happen?"

"Cleveland's the hellmouth.  Buffy gets it with a few of the senior girls.  The rest are magically airlifted to a mentor somewhere safer while I take the tots and head south.  We have a small field office I can take over in Houston and one in Miami.  I'm welcome to take over either and make sure my girls will survive and any others I can teach to hunt."

Dean nodded.  "Decent.  Which way are you heading?"

"Probably Miami.  It's the safer town.  It's got some decent guardians already.  A lot more crime but I know people from down there and I had to do some scouting when we took Carma from her mom's new friends in the gang she was sleeping with."  He sighed a bit.  "Their local PD was very proactive when I brought her to them to make the report.  Then we disappeared and very few tried to follow up where I had her hidden."

"Probably thought it'd protect her so it's all good," Dean agreed.  Xander nodded.  "Okay, so Dawn?"

"Coming with us.  She'll do her internship wherever I end up.  She's already decided that."  B'letta nodded at that.  "The clan and I will have it, Dean.  You guys can follow if you want.  It'd give you two some protection from her too."

"That's what I was thinking," Dean admitted, looking at Sam, who shrugged a bit as he was taking off the gloves he had put on to do the stitches.

She looked back at him.  "Very gentle, thank you, Samuel."  She kissed him on the cheek then laid one on Xander that made him moan.  "I'm for a bubble bath."

"Kids are all in bed," he promised with a grin.  She strolled off.  He winked at Dean.  "She's very deadly to my self control too."

"I can see that," he joked back.  "So we're set on emergency plans?"

"Yup, and we're set on how to take her out if we have to.  You guys don't have to go on that.  She wants slayers and she'll get them in her face."

Dean nodded.  "If you need us though...."

"Of course and if you need our help on a hunt, you'll ask.  It's all good and you guys can brag about my back room and reasonable prices too," he offered with a grin.

"Cool.  We can do that," Dean agreed.  "We'll be here through the holidays probably."

"That's cool.  The kids need more friends.  We all know the secrets separate them out."

"You know, there's a girls' religious boarding school that a lot of hunters' kids go to," Sam offered.

"We heard but I don't think they need that sort of stress yet.  We're pretty inclusive no matter what your religion.  Halla's mom was borderline cannibal for the dead so you kept a part of them with you if I remember right.  Willow's Wiccan.  Buffy's not really.  Neither am I really, leaning kinda toward generalized pagan than not.  Dawn's got her thing going too with some of the Druid ways."

"It's still a thought if you need it," Sam offered.

"Oh, some of the slayers could definitely use it and it'd help protect the school and the other kids.  When we heard, Willow suggested we do send a few of the girls who are catholic there once they're trained if they're young enough.  I think she picked out two and she's talking them into it."  He sat down again.  "So anyway, welcome to our whacked out reality problem.  If you guys want help with stuff, let us know.  We will help even with the little things.  Buffy will take any reason to go shopping, including your future fashion plate."

Dean grinned.  "I might take her up on that.  Missy would love to go with the other girls.  She's been afraid to make friends because we had to leave so many places."

"But now she can write and you can teach her how to email," Xander reminded him with a grin.  "I had to teach mine to email with Dawn when she's sucked into her schooling or research.  They usually try to get her to come cook on the nights I'm making stuff they hate.  That's how she knows to eat with friends."

Sam snickered.  "Bobby would do the same thing."

"Missy too," Dean agreed with a grin.  "See you at school tomorrow?"

"Sure will.  All the brood has to go.  I want them to be smarter than I was."

"Cool beans."  They left, heading to take their two sleepy ones home.  Bobby tried to protest it but he was fully asleep on Caleb's bed anyway.

Xander leaned back, getting comfortable while he made emergency plans.  At least until he heard the water upstairs shut off.  Then he decided he could think just as well from his girl's bubble bath.  Plus get some cuddling and groping time in.

***

Xander looked up from his reading in his van, listening to the news report going on the radio.  "Huh.  We made it to January."  He called the base.  "It's Xander.  We had an attack on the hellmouth?"  He listened to the preliminary intel.  "Scatter.  Have Buffy sound the command."  He hung up and got out, going over the shiny black Impala Dean was leaning against.  "Heard the radio?"

"Not yet.  Why?" he asked, grinning at him.  It was a pretty day in Cleveland.  No snow today.  The last stuff had melted so he had gotten the road salt off his baby.

"Attack on the park."  Dean stiffened.  "Took out the grandstand," he finished quietly.  "I ordered a scatter."

"We'll follow.  We found someone sniffing around Bobby the other day."

"Bobby has some magic.  Dawn pointed it out."  He looked around, spotting someone.  "Aww, look, it's a demon child," he said just loudly enough to be heard.  "You wanted something?"

"She'll still get you, Harris.  You're a worthy target."

He leaned down with a grin on his face, looking like he was giving a compliment to the other parents.  "I know what you are and how to dust you, little geekling.  And I'll enjoy calling the hellmouth open to eat you and your realm.  Remember, I can do that," he hissed with a wink.  The demon disappeared.  Xander stood up, giving Dean an interested look.  "So we're probably going to be heading later."  He patted him on the arm.  "South side.  Avenue K.  Blue building that looks like a bank."  He walked inside, going to the principal's office.  "Bad news."  She glared at him.

"My teaching duties are taking me out of the area for a bit so I've got to move the kids to the south.  Sorry.  We'll be heading this weekend.  I just got the call."  He waved.  "We'll write for records, dear."  He strolled out.  She hated him and he didn't really like her all that much either.  On the way back to the car, his kids ran out.  "Into the van," he called.  "Bobby, your parents need you home tonight."  He pointed at Dean.  "Go there, little fella.  We'll see you in a few days."  He smiled and patted him on the head.  "Remember, you're protected.  Paka likes you."  He shuddered but went to pounce his uncle.  His cousin was hugging her dad too.  "Into the van."

They climbed in and did up their own belts, letting him get in to drive and call around at the same time.  "It's me.  Scatter," he told Dawn's phone.  Then he hung up and called another contact out of LA.  "Henry," he said dryly.  "Small issue.  No, bigger issue.  Lilith sort of issue.  I know I warned you, dude, but now we've got to pull a move.  Yes, that's what I mean.  Tonight.  Tomorrow at the latest.  And I do need top dollar.  After all, my girls have learned shopping from Buffy."  He hung up and took them to the store.  "Guys, gotta work in the special room.  Come with me," he said, gathering the other three.

Dawn gave him a scared look.  "Chill, it's only the beginning," he said calmly.  "It just started.  We're moving the most vulnerable."  She nodded, relaxing some.  "Arrange things however and find all those special orders to go out tonight."  She nodded, going to do that.  He could lose the store.  He had insurance if she attacked it.  He didn't want to endanger anyone else with the weapons though.  Dawn came back an hour later while he was packing boxes, muttering a packing spell.  Everything was packed into the trunk in there.  "Weapons in the vault?" he asked.

"Both vaults.  Including the one at the house.  It's all packed and ready for us, Xander."  She gave him a hug then the others.  "Buffy said we're overreacting to that one attack."

He smiled.  "No I'm not.  Her minions have been spotted that way.  She knows that."

"I know.  She said they're moving tonight anyway."  He nodded.  "The store?"

"Pick what we really want to bring to read."  She went to do that, packing up the kids books section for their clan and the sci-fi fantasy section for him and Dawn, plus some romance and the how-to manuals for them.  The last customer finally picked up their order and they closed the store for a few weeks by the sign.  Then they headed off into the night with a stop for burgers and to pick up the stuff at the house.  Thankfully her packing spell packed everything into some very compact containers so it all fit in the van.

***

Xander looked up as a person he didn't expect to see showed up.  "Finn," he said patiently.  "You don't look like my ususal contact."

"You're selling your vault?  Are you retiring, Harris?  We need to know if we need to move operatives into Cleveland."

"Lilith's trying to take down the Council.  The First was a protégé of hers."  Riley Finn shuddered in horror.  "Exactly.  And I have kids.  We're pulling the emergency plans and I've got to move the mini-terrors somewhere safer.  So not really retiring, forming a secondary younger group in a safe locale for training purposes to put it into government speak."

"I can understand that.  I'm authorized to take over your primary vault for you if you'll accept.  One of the UN teams is being moved into town."

"Buffy won't like that."

"They're former Watcher trained."

"She really won't like that."

"They're good people.  She won't mind them if she survives.  We'll pay going black market rate for it."

Xander considered it.  "Fine."  They shook hands.  He got the box Dawn had packed them into, peeking then handing it over.  "Pay my account by Friday.  I'm closing it then."

"Deal.  Anyone else going?"

"Of course.  But they have kids too."  He grinned.  "Be safe.  She's tried an apocalypse before."

"You too.  The kids are too precious to risk.  Even my wife likes Paka."  He walked off with the box.  When he got back to the office, their witch on staff unpacked it.  Weapons shot out all over the room they were in.  "Jesus," he said in awe.  "How did Harris find all this?  I expected a lot less.  Maybe a few missiles or something."

"There goes our budget," his wife agreed, checking on them.  "Clean, labeled correctly, loaded and ready to be used if necessary."  She looked at him.  "Pay the man."  He nodded, moving to do that while she called the new team to Cleveland.  "It's Sam Finn.  Cleveland's Council is pulling a scatter move.  Lilith is after some of them.  Move in, we have an apocalypse vault for you to use if necessary.  Get with Summers as soon as you can."  She hung up.  Riley finished the stuff that would pay Xander.  It was a practical move and Xander was a practical man no matter how much he hated Riley.

***

Xander looked at their new building, leading the kids inside.  The receptionist gave him a horrified look.  "Hi, Beth.  We're here and yet not here."

"Oh, no.  Cleveland?"

"Buffy went against Lilith for the first time last night.  It wasn't pretty but they're all alive.  Some barely but they're there.  Finn's people are adding to her.  Is our apartment ready?"

"Yes, Xander.  Rooms are all set up for you.  The three slayers in residence are staying or not?  We didn't have orders."

"Depending on who."

"Cara, Cho, and Rona."

"I thought Rona was in Cleveland last night," he admitted, looking confused.  "Dawn?"  She went to check the girls, banishing the demons pretending to be slayers.  Then they took over the building.  He gave Beth a copy of the picture he carried of Dean and Sam plus their kids.  "Expect them soon.  They're allowed anywhere.  They're hunters."  She nodded at that, making a note.  "Find them a school.  Call for records.  Let Dawn unpack.  We'll be up there."  He walked off again.  He hated that the Council devolved to him if Giles was injured.  Since he was presently knocked into goofy land from the battle last night, he was it.  And he loathed this job.  Beth came up an hour later with reports.  "Around here?"

"Sixteen problem areas, three ghosts we didn't know how to handle, a request from the local crime lab to talk to you about this building, and a few other things, Xander.  Is Mr. Giles going to be all right?"

He shrugged.  "He was only knocked out and came up goofy.  We think so but it's better to have it out of Cleveland right now."  She nodded.  "Okay, arrange my schedule tomorrow.  As long as they're not stressful we can talk then.  Dean and Sam's type handle ghosts and things.  Hand that to them when they get in.  They should be here in a few weeks if it's not critical."

"One's banging around in a group home."

Xander found the fax machine and took that report from her, glancing over it before faxing it to a number Dean had said was their emergency contact number.  He added a note at the bottom saying Dean and Sam were headed their way but it'd be days if not weeks before they got here.  Then he sat back down, looking at her.  "Any other good news?"

"Grandson of a watcher in the lab.  Or two possibly."  She handed that over.

"Decent.  For, against, or unknowing?"

"Probably not knowing."

"Even better.  Why do they want to chat?"

"They heard strange things."

Xander grimaced.  "See if the officers I had help her are still around?  See if they'll talk to them first?"  She nodded, making a note of it.  "Any other cheery news?"

"Your bank account went up by a lot last night," she said, giving him a stare.

"We didn't need all my vaults but Riley's secondary team might.  It's practical in case we need to find us a house."

"I noticed the two boys."

"D'Hoffryn," he said.

"Ah."  She made another note.  "Any particular school?"

"Good school, non religious, can probably fit another boy and girl Bri's age.  In her class."

"Done."  She walked off to make those calls.  She loved being the secretary.

Xander called his contacts.  "We're here.  We're fine so far.  Dawn's unpacking tonight.  The kids crashed for a nap.  We've got meetings set up with the locals.  Did the B team show up?"  He smiled.  "Even better, Willow.  Yeah I did.  My backup one.  Not my primary one with the babies but the one at the store.  It should be more than enough if they need it.  Let me know when I can go back to being my goofy, loveable self."  He hung up and went to check on the kids.  Dawn was asleep on the couch.  Everett was staring out the window so he picked him up with a groan.  "Too heavy," he complained lightly.

"Am not," he complained.  He looked at him.  "Why are we here?"

"A bigger bad thing wants Buffy."

"Are we in trouble?"

"Nope.  That's why we moved so suddenly, Everett."  He gave him a squeeze.  "I know you still get some bleed through from your last life.  Tell me if it gets too intense and we'll try to fix it, all right?"  He nodded.  "Good.  Now go nap.  We've got a long week finding a new school for you guys."  He put him down with a pat on the head.  "I'll call out for pizza soon."  He went to bed for a while.  So did Xander.  He was exhausted from all the driving.

***

Xander looked up as the redheaded man was shown into the office.  "Lieutenant, I'm shocked to see it's you that wanted to talk to us.  What's happened?"

"Word was sent to us by some unusual sources that your organization tends to harbor a certain...shady element, Mr. Harris."

Xander grinned.  "You and I both know what the Council does, Horatio Caine.  You also know why we do it and why you can't live in the total light or the darkness to do it."

"I do but I've also heard some very impressive words about certain arsenals....."  He let it trail off into a question.

"I sold my backup vault to a military group that was helping out up there.  I won't lie and say I'm not prepared if we have to use it but I will assure you that we don't use it unless absolutely necessary.  Even most of the other hunters are that way."

"That is good to know but what you consider necessary and we do could be different."

Xander leaned on the desk, staring at him.  "Lieutenant, I'm in your city for good right now because a very high demon named Lilith is trying to take us all down.  We've decentralized again."  He shuddered.  "Exactly.  I came here with my kids.  They're safer down here.  I won't lie and say I won't be conversing or conferencing in with other slayers or hunters.  I have a good bit of respect for others who jumped into the battle.  I will assure you that if we have an apocalypse centered down here, you'll hear it from me or one of mine as soon as I know so you can warn others.  Especially if we think it's a real threat to the populace.

"I am *not* like the old council.  We can't operate in the same paranoid, shadowy way that they did for centuries because they built the system that way as it was growing up.  They influenced whole governments to not look at us.  We're the nicer, kinder, more thoughtful version of them.  The girls are treated a whole lot better.  The people in command have common and uncommon sense.  Actually, until he regains sense, I'm in command."

"What sort of dangers did you bring with you?" he asked.

"The current problem has a very small chance of coming back to threaten me or hurt my kids.   Yes I was there, I did help in the battle she's trying to get back at us for winning.   Another of her former targets is also probably going to be down here for a bit.  We will keep it to ourselves unless something is absolutely necessary.  You should have no fears about your city."

"I do know that we do have a small demon population," he offered.  "Are they safe as well?"

"As long as they're peaceful we are not kill them all types.  If they act, then they'd better be ready for the fight they started, but not to just outright attack, no."

"That's reassuring.  Where is Carma McKensie anyway?"

"Right now I think she's in England for a few weeks and then she's going to be training with a mentor in Thailand.  With her past, she'll know how to avoid some of the worst elements that're preying on the population and her mentor will guide her in helping stop the demons who're adding to that problem."

"Good."  He relaxed slightly.  "You have children?"

"I have eight wonderful kids," he offered with a grin, showing him the latest picture.  "The twins are Briony and Amanda.  They're mine naturally.  The others were given to me to raise.  The three oldest are the youngest slayers that I picked up in Africa.  The other three are ones that're important and given into my care."

Horatio handed back the picture.  "They're a good looking family."

"Half the slayers shop for stress relief.  It means I don't have to do it as often."  Horatio let out a small laugh at that.   "We're doing the normal new resident things.  School finding, seeing if we need to restart the bookstore down here since I heard late last night that she had it blown up on me.  Finding the grocery stores and all that stuff."

"Then I won't worry and I'll come to you if I hear of a problem."

"Please do.  Especially if you find more demon and vampire-caused deaths.  I know they'd hit your team first."  He held out a hand, getting it shaken.  "I hope Miami has an easy year, Lieutenant."

"From your mouth to God's ear, Mr. Harris."

"Well, maybe the Powers', but possibly not that high up," he offered with a grin, making Horatio laugh again as he walked off.  He relaxed, looking outside.  Beth gave him an awed look.  "He helped when I had to come get Carma."

"I remember that but you made him laugh.  That's almost unheard of these days."  She came in with a few information packets.  "Six good non-religious schools.  All private academies.  All with good records, good security, and don't do background checks on the parents."

"All expensive?"

"Two aren't that bad.  If they sign on they do get tuition help," she reminded him, going back to her desk.

"Thank you.  When do I see them in person?"

"Next week."

"Decent."  He settled in to look over the information.  He weeded out three almost immediately but one kept drawing him back.  "Is Clayson magically related?"

"Magically protected," she corrected, looking at him.  "A gift from an alumni a few years ago.  It seems nice.  I go past there when I head to Wal-Mart."

"Huh.  I'll look.  It might be."  He put it aside to share with the guys when they got there.   He had other formal matters to handle for the moment and they had to be done.  Decentralizing did screw things up in some of the administration areas.  Paychecks couldn't be late but timecards had to be sent longer distances.  So he authorized them to move into an electronic one.  Something Giles hated but oh well!  He looked up at the cough.  "Problems?" he asked.

"Some scrungy looking guy is here to see you, Xander."

"Show him in."  It was either a witch of some sort, a demon in human disguise, or a hunter.  He smiled when he saw it was a hunter.  "Hi, Xander Harris, Watchers Council."

"How did you get his number?"

"Dean and Sam's kids went to the same kindergarten my daughter Bri did.  Plus the new council doesn't discriminate.  We're thankful guys like you exist so we're not stuck doing it all on our own."

"You suck up pretty well.  Government service?" he guessed.

"Girls.  I'm always surrounded by girls."  The guy laughed.  "Seriously.  First a slayer and her witch and then my girls.  It's nice I have two sons to blunt some of that with some guy time with Dean and Sam now and then to remind myself I'm an adult guy."

The hunter laughed harder.  "Dean said you were a pisser."

"Very muchly so but ghosts aren't our thing.  Plus most of the slayers are out of the city except some very young ones.  We'll get an older one sometime soon but not yet."

"Why?"

"Heard about the problem Sam and Dean ended up in?"

"Yeah, and I nearly died.  Why?"

"The First, who brought down Sunnydale, was her protégé.  She's mad at our senior slayer."

"Aw, crap, kid."

"Which is why we decentralized and I'm in charge until Giles wakes back up.  So, can you handle that ghost in the group home for us and would you need any support we can offer?"

"I can handle it.  Not an issue there.  Sammy said they'd see you in a few weeks."

"That's about what I expected.  They have to be more careful.  Their kids have more danger than mine do."

"You have kids?"  Xander showed him the picture.  "Large brood.  No wife?"

"Present girlfriend."  He grinned and put it back onto the desk.  "Three are very young slayers."

"Understood.  I'll handle that soon enough.  Do you know anything?"

"I haven't been researching into it.  We've been unpacking.  Beth, do we have anything more on that ghost in the group home?" he called.

"No, Xander.  Not yet.  We do have an online subscription to the newspapers' archives if they need to look through it.  Plus our research center."

"If we can help you, ask," Xander told him.  The hunter nodded, going to get online in their research center so he could look up who had died there and why.  It'd help to find the ghost so he could salt and burn them.  Xander went back to the unamusing task of paperwork.  He really hated being in charge.  Everett ran in and pounced.  "Good pounce, little guy.  Is Bri trying to do your hair again?"

"She wants to dye it, Dad."

He snorted.  "Bri's too young for hair dye.  You can tell her hair dye rots brains and all that good stuff and tell her I said to stop it.  I'll be up in about an hour once I get all this crap straightened out."  He nodded and ran back that way.  He knew in an hour one of the kids would be pouncing him.  Halla would be timing it in case he got caught up.  He took the information packets up there when he got done, a whole five minutes before he'd get pounced again.  "Guys, we need to talk about the new school."  They booed.  "Sorry but unless Sam does it, we can't home school you terrors."  He sat down with them at the coffee table so they could all see the pictures.   "We'll look in person next week."

Bri looked over them.  "I don't like their uniforms.  They're yucky, Daddy."

Xander shrugged.  "Sometimes that happens, dear.  Judge it on more than yucky uniforms.  Remember, you can wear play clothes afterward."

She pouted.  "I don't like uniforms."

"I don't care and if you whine, you don't get dessert," he told her.

"Why can't we go home?" she complained, trying not to whine.  "I miss my friends."

"Because the bad things were coming for Auntie Buffy and we had to get you eight to safety.   Didn't we have this talk?"

"It still sucks."

"Yes it does," he agreed.  "But dying would suck more.  Right?"  She nodded, still pouting.  He gave her a hug.  "You'll get to see Missy and Bobby pretty soon I think.  You'll make new friends too.  We Harris' are likeable and easy to get along with so we'll make plenty of new friends.  You can still write your ones up there if you want."

"Won't that put them in danger?" Dean asked as he walked in carrying Missy, who was struggling.

Xander looked at him.  "Put her down."  He put her down and she ran behind him.  "Missy, where's Bobby?"

"Car," she whined.  "Uncle Sam's going to be *so* pissed."

Xander nodded.  "Probably."  Xander activated the wards, trapping the demon.  "Nice try but Dean has more scars."  He went back to going over the stuff, finding his phone in Amanda's hands.  She was trying to dial but couldn't remember the area code.  He hit the speed dial button, getting a frantic Sam.  "I've got Missy and the demon that stole her who was pretending to be Dean."  He hung up and cuddled her until she wiggled free.  "We're looking at schools you guys might like down here."

"Are they 'spensive?  You know daddy doesn't like to spend money.  He fussed at the price of candy yesterday."

He grinned.  "I think we can help a bit with that," he offered.  She beamed.  "Dawn even packed all the kids' section of the bookstore if you wanted to read for a while or take a nap.  Bri's exhausted anyway."

"No I'm not," she said with a sulk, arms crossed over her chest.  "That's mean, Daddy."

"Missy could probably use cuddled until her dad and Uncle can come get her."

"I can cuddle without needing a nap and I make a good pillow because I'm soft and smooshy like you are.  B'letta said so."  She pulled Missy over, cuddling her.  "There, you can nap on me if you need to."  She nodded to seal that statement and went back to looking.  "It still has yucky uniforms, Daddy."

"Fine.  We'll look anyway.  The school might be nicer than the uniforms, dear."

"Fine."

"Thank you."  He looked at the demon.  "Got any input?"

"It won't save them from us," he sneered.  "We'll still get the young slayers."

Xander snickered.  "Sure you will.  Because I'm so sure you want Sunnydale to come open."  The demon paused, then went back to sneering.  "No one told you that I'm the new source of the Sunnydale taint?  That the Cleveland hellmouth tried to hug me?"  The demon tried to back away from him.  "Or that I nearly destroyed demon realms when they were teething?"  He smiled sweetly.  "You don't wanna fuck with my clan.  You want Buffy, you go after Buffy.  Not Dawn, not me, Buffy.  You touch my kids and that draws me back into the fight and then you're fucked."

The demon tried to disappear but still couldn't.  "Like 'em?  Willow created those," he said with an evil smirk.  The more he fought, the weaker the demon became.  His phone rang.  "Harris."  He smiled.  "She's here and fine, Dean.  She's cuddled up to Bri because Bri said she was as soft and snuggly as I am.  She's fine and the demon's trapped.  Sure, we're here.  No, he walked in carrying her.  She's fine.  I promise.  Dawn'll be back soon and she'll make sure for you.  You know I'd tell you if she was scratched or anything.  Sure, we're here.  Beth knows to expect you.  Looking at schools.  By the way, don't worry about tuition right now."

He hung up and grinned at the demon.  "Dean wants to talk to you."  The demon tried to remove himself again but the wards were still leeching off him.  He lost his illusion power.  "Huh, my girlfriend's one of you.  B'letta?" he called.  She appeared so he pointed.  "Tried to hurt Missy Winchester.  Your clan elder said he didn't want to see me again so have some fun with him," he finished with a grin.  "Do it out of sight with the kids please if you play with him."

"Of course I will.  Missy, did he hurt you?"

"Just snatched me at a rest stop when I was going potty," she said tiredly.  "I'm fine.  He didn't try to touch me like some skanky perv or anything."

"Good.  Then I won't have to hurt him.  Much."  She felt the wards release and took him with her to have some fun.  No one touched her kids.  Even if she broke up with Xander she'd still be protecting those kids.

Xander winked at her.  "Your dad's in a Sammy style fuss according to what Bobby yelled from the back seat.  They should be here in about a day.  You can borrow some clothes and stuff too, Princess Winchester."

She beamed.  "Thanks, Uncle Xander."  She looked at Bri.  "We should match."

"We should," she agreed.  They went to play in her closet.  It was so much better than *school*.

Xander went to start dinner.  The kids would be hungry soon; since Adanne and Paka bit he wanted to feed them something other than his hand.

***

Dean stormed in.  Beth smiled.  "Good afternoon, Mr. Winchester.  You made good time.  The girls are upstairs in the apartment watching Superman with Mr. Harris.  The boys are presently trying to play fort to keep the girls out of their hair.  Go up the elevator to the top floor once your brother and nephew get here."

He paused to look at her.  "He has a secretary?"

"I was already here and until Mr. Giles can function he's in charge," she said cheerfully.  "It means those who like computers aren't forced to hide in the shadows to do their jobs."

"Huh."  He pushed the button.  Sam and Bobby walked in with their bags.  "They're upstairs watching cartoons.  The boys are playing, Bobby."

"Cool.  I need some play time.  I hate all days in the car."  He got down in the elevator, running off once they got up there to pounce Caleb.  "I'm here!  Finally no more driving!"  They dragged him into the fort.  He was older and taller so he could build their walls higher to keep the girls out.

Xander grinned at them.  "The girls are doing good together.  They match today."

"They do," Dean agreed, staring at his daughter.  His little girl was wearing a plaid skirt and a navy blue t-shirt, tights, and shoes.  Bri was wearing another plaid skirt with different colors and a green t-shirt, tights, and shoes.  "Is that their school stuff?"

"I'd never decide on schools without input," he said dryly.  "But I will help with tuition."  Dean grimaced.  "That way the kids won't pout us to death.  It's that or home schooling them.  Sam, up for that?"

"I do a lot of their home training anyway," he admitted.  He sat down, smiling at the girls.  "Have a good sleepover, Missy?"

"I did," she said happily.  "We even talked Auntie Dawn into streaking our hair with Sun In."

"That's wetting it, spraying it on, and using a hair dryer," Xander told them.  "I woke up to the sound of the hair dryer.  I nearly spanked Dawn too."  Dean relaxed, sitting down once he had picked up his girl to put in his lap.  "She's cool, Dean.  She had a few nightmares but she's good.  The demon didn't touch her.  B'letta got him for her when he showed up pretending to be you.  The girls have been complaining about school stuff for the last week.  I had them all do workbooks for the last week too.  Including her so she's not missing any lessons."  They shared a look.  "The scrungy guy as Beth called him got the ghost at the group home that was worrying people.  They think Giles will be back to normal tomorrow so I can revert control again.  We're looking at schools next week if you wanted to come with the clan.  There's a small apartment here in the building if you wanted as well."

"You sure?"

"I need someone to help me if shit hits the fan and it's a fully warded building, Dean.  We're safer here than anywhere else.  Plus it means no more pouting kids.  I'm tired of pouting kids."

"Yeah, ours pouted too," Sam agreed.  "Did they write their friends?"

"Yup," Xander agreed.  "Sent their teacher an email too.  Bri only mentioned that Missy and Bobby were okay but traveling right now.  If they could you'd let them write their friends themselves."

"That's cool," Dean agreed.  "We can let that happen.  Any new news from up there?"

"She's sneaky but Buffy has PMS and so does Willow.  The whole hellmouth is presently clearing out.  Especially since the UN's B-team for demon hunting just showed up last night with my backup closet from the store."  He gave him an insane grin.  "Which means if I have to I can help with tuition.  That way we have less pouting.  Quit pouting, Missy."

"You said we could have pizza tonight, Uncle Xander."

"You can but your dad can order yours.  That way you can eat and cuddle with him."

"Plus we can come eat with you so daddy can have stinky onions again," Paka said happily.

"I remember grinding up fried grub worms to feed you," he shot back with a dirty look.

"Grub worms are still less gross than onions," she retorted with an evil look.  "They stink and they taste bad too."

"I like onions," Dean told her.  Missy grimaced but nodded.  "So you'll have to steal from Sammy's stuff if you don't want any."

"Shoot.  Uncle Sammy, can I eat with you so I don't have stinky onions?"

"Sure, Paka.  We can all eat together so you guys can play for a few more hours."  She cheered and the girls went back to their cartoon watching.

"Superman?" Dean asked quietly.

"My kids will be geeks just like their daddy," Xander said firmly.  "This is where I started.  This and Super Friends."  He grinned.  "They know they can have anime when they get older.  That way they can pick their own version of geek."

"It won't keep the boys from hitting on them when they're teenagers."

"No but it means they'll date a geek instead of a jock, which is always better.  Geeks need more hot chicks who're nice and sweet.  Plus can shoo off bullies."

"Good point.  Sammy could've used a few more at that age too."

"Dean!" he complained.

"You could've.  I got all the chicks back then.  They thought you were too geeky and gangly."

"I grew into my height.  You never grew into your mouth," he shot back.

Halla looked at them.  "You two should kiss like on the soaps and be nicer to each other.  That way there wouldn't be any more fighting."  She beamed.  "It always works on Auntie Buffy's soaps," she said at the horrified, yet amused look Sam was giving her.

Xander poked her gently on the side with a finger.  "No more watching soaps, Halla.  That's not real life.  That's a fake life where everyone's pretty and shallow.  Though, Miami has plenty of that sort.  You're not allowed to turn into that sort.  None of you are."

"They get all the nice boys though.  And the occasional bad boy according to Auntie Buffy."

"You'll get plenty without watching soaps because you're too young," he said more firmly.  "No more soaps, Halla."

"Yes, Daddy," she sighed, pouting some.  "It's very educational."

"No it's not and if you're learning tricks like that I'm putting you in a convent school with mean nuns."

"Yes, Daddy," she complained, looking at Dean.  "He's being mean again.  Maybe you should kiss him instead."

"Uncle Sammy said Daddy only likes skanky hos," Missy said, looking very serious.  "Uncle Xander would need huge breasts and booty shorts like them.  Maybe even roller skates too."

Sam groaned, shaking his head.  "I did not say that!"

"Yes you did!  You were complaining at Daddy about staring at women like that, Uncle Sam."  She blew a kiss with a smile.  "Some day I'll pick up smart boys instead of boys like Daddy."

"You do that, princess.  If I let you date,  you can do that."

She looked back at him.  "Of course you'll let me date.  It's a girl's job to date and drive her daddy nuts then eventually give him grandchildren."

"Not before you're thirty," he ordered.  "And no dating before you're fifty."

"Shouldn't that be in the other order?" Sam teased with a grin.

"Nope.  That way I don't ever have to be a Grandpa."

Xander laughed.  "I know that feeling.  Paka once told me she'd give me many grandsons to honor the family."  Paka blushed, ducking her head.  "I think that's the last time the villagers gave me liquor."  Paka nodded.  "They told me not to worry, girls didn't want that many babies after the first one."

"Good to know."  He gave his daughter a squeeze.  "Is this other apartment big enough for us?"

"No clue," Xander admitted.  "Haven't been in it yet."

"We'll look later then."

"Beth has the keys."  He paged down there.  "Beth, keys to the other place?"

She came off the elevator with a stack of papers to make him sigh and a set of keys.  "We have a parking garage too so you don't have to worry about parking meters, Mr. Winchester."

"Daddy, you can't date Beth," Missy said.  "She's not busty enough for you and she's way too nice."  Dean blushed, moaning into his daughter's hair.

Beth smiled.  "It's okay.  I'm already married, Missy.  My wife might mind."

"Oooh.  Okay.  Sorry."

"It's all right.  I understand."  She looked at Xander.  "Sign and date please.  Before he finishes coming around."

He looked, taking the pen she held to sign what needed to be signed.  He handed back one.  "I'll be lynched if you take out the slayer shopping trips."  He finished up and let her leave to fax them around.  "There, all set up so even Giles can't fix things back to the pre-computer age.  Missy, why don't you have a potty break and get your book to work on with your dad?"

"Because it's cartoon time," she told him.  "We'll read later.  I'm enjoying being cuddled."  She snuggled in better.

"Love you too, Missy," Dean assured her, giving her a squeeze.  She might be the only non-skanky ho he'd ever love.  Even when she realized a daddy couldn't fix every little problem for her and became more independent.  Sam grinned at him, taking a picture with his phone.  "Thanks, geek boy."

"Welcome.  We need more family photos."  He went back to playing with the boys.  Dean was enjoying his daughter being back with him.  He wouldn't bother them anytime soon.  He would have been just as frantic if the demon had taken Bobby from him.

Xander put in an order for pizzas, including two without onions or mushrooms for the kids.  It was going to be a good night.

***

Dawn came out of her last day of real classes, planning a small party with her buddies before she went to do her hours in Miami.  She was needed down there.  She saw someone with black eyes coming her way and zapped her friend's phone to ring and summon her off to answer it in private.  The demon sneered, moving closer.  "Hi, are you lost?' she asked kindly.  "I can show you where to go if you need me to."

"I know exactly where to go, Miss Summers.  Someone wants to talk with you."

"Leave Dawn alone," one of her buddies said.  "I don't know who you are but buzz off, man."

Dawn got between the two when the demon tried to hex him. "No, not cool."  The demon stared at her.  "You can't have me.  You can't handle me either.  Tyler, take the others and I'll try to meet you for pizza later.  'Kay?"

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I don't want you guys hurt if this one tries something dumb."  He nodded, dragging the others off to the local pizza joint they hung out at.  "So, what did you want to talk about, little one?"

"We know what you are," he sneered.  He moved closer, trying to menace her.  "We know you will serve Lilith."

"Nope, sorry.  The only one I serve is Xander."  The demon sneered so she leveled a spell at him, making him shriek as the demon was forcefully sent out of his body.  The body flopped down.  She checked for a pulse then called campus security.  "This guy collapsed at my feet after making some threats against me.  I didn't touch him but he's unconscious.  No, I checked for a pulse.  In front of the science building.  Thank you."  She hung up and waited.  The guards came to get him.  Both had black eyes.  She zapped them with the same spell.  One of their coworkers came running up, seeing the demons floating out.  She smiled.  "I don't know what sort of epidemic that is.  I'm not that far into my medical courses and I didn't have to take virology.  It was optional."

"What are you?" he asked.

"Pissed that they came to kidnap me."

"Why?"

"I work with people on the old Brown Primary School campus."  A few other slayers were on campus and had been caught patrolling by the campus cops.

"Oh, them.  Okay.  So this is...."

"Their crap, yeah.  They wanted me because my sister's there.  And I'm going to Miami."  He nodded quickly, letting her walk around them.  "They should be fine, have massive hangovers later, but they all should be healthy.  I'd suggest a priest but that's up to them."  She headed for her car, getting in to magically move herself to the building in Miami.  She'd call her friends in a few minutes, once she finished shaking and reacting to nearly being taken again.

***

Xander looked up as the wards went off, frowning some.  "Dawn's here."  Dean looked over from his book with Missy and Bobby.  "She is."  She walked in looking confident but he knew.  "Vampires or otherwise, Dawnie?"

"Possessed people.  By the way, that spell Sammy found works *really* well.  All three of them went down but they'll be fine."  She sat down next to Dean, taking Bobby to hug.  He grimaced but let her for a minute before wiggling away.  "Anyway, I'm all arranged for hours down here.  I start in two weeks so I have a bit of a break."  She smiled.  "And they're going to get my foot up their asses."

"That's my job.  Yours is to protect the kids and the home base," Xander reminded her firmly.  "I will handle it, Dawn."

"Yes, Xander," she sighed.  She looked at Dean.  "Are you that sort of overprotective big brother too?"

"Yup.  Even worse at times.  I drove off some of Sammy's skankier dates all the time when he was younger."

"Damn, you are worse."  She stood up.  "Where am I bunking, X-man?"

"We can split my room since you'll be working funny hours and Giles doesn't think it's a good idea to have administrative oversight up there until this is done with."

"Oooh, yay.  He hates doing paperwork."

"He hates it more since I gave his secretary permission to accept emailed things and print them for him."  She snickered, walking upstairs to get something to eat and take a nap.

"Plans?" Dean asked.

"Some.  Still percolating.  We'll see very shortly."  He looked around, frowning.  "The wards just went off.  Beth?" he called.  She leaned in.  "The wards just went off why?"

"I don't know, Xander.  I'll check with building security."  She went to do that.  She came back a minute later.  "The research center has someone in holding."

He got up and headed that way, nodding at the higher demon.  "Yes, oh great supposed one, what did you want this time?" he asked dryly.

"Your mouth will get you in trouble, Harris," she sneered.

Xander smirked.  "Maybe, but my kids are worse.  I taught them all I know."  He looked her over.  "Huh, didn't change."  He stared at her.  "How did you get out?"

"I didn't.  I'm not the one you think.  Release me?"

"Fat chance.  I know very well you're not the person who owns the face you're wearing."  He pulled out a chair and sat down, looking this demon over.  "So, you wanted a chat.  Talk.  I might listen."

"Buffy will be destroyed.  She's very upset with her."

"Buffy's a slayer.  She's got a lot of them at her back and a military unit to help.  If she wants mine all she has to do is ask."

"She won't though.  You know she won't."

Xander nodded.  "So I've heard in the past but she's finally gotten past that.  She's already asked for some advice and I gave it to her.  We'll come out of this apocalypse sane and mostly whole.  Even if she does return.  Though this time Willow won't be allowed to bring her back."

"That's probably a good thing."  The demon shifted.  "You could let me out."

"I could give birth to live sea monkeys too, but I'm not going to."  He crossed his feet after they were in the chair across from him.  "Any other good advice?  Because I'm keeping the kids out of the thing with Lilith."

"You were there.  She wants you too."

"Yes but I'm not the easy target the slayers are."  She gave him a horrified look.  "Slayers are tainted by the slayer essence.  Anyone can find a slayer with the same spell Willow did if they want to.  Not like it's not written down in a few places.  Finding one man is always harder, even if he is tainted."

"She knows you're here."

"Yes, but attacking me still isn't strategically sound.  Unless she's insane?"  She slowly shook her head.  "Then trying me and the mini-slayers or the kids gets her nothing but one really pissed off person with explosives, weapons, tactics, and combat knowledge.  Because I will use everything I have, every contact I have ever gotten, everything I can beg, borrow, steal, or magic away, to ruin her if she comes after my family.  She wants the slayers for that battle.  Let her fight them.  Me and mine are staying out of this one.  They're too young and weren't there."

"You were."

"I was," he agreed.  "I was injured and still helped kick ass."  He stood up, looking at her.  "If I could do that then, imagine what I can do now.  With some retraining to compensate for my eye being gone.  With some extra combat training since then.  With a lot of training from some shaman along the way of picking up the girls.  With a whole host of magical information I had downloaded into me during that last minor possessions," he hissed, leaning closer.  "I'm not the universe's bitch this time.  Go hunt someone else.  Because I won't start it but I will end it and it will be messy.  Now, anything else?" he asked with a smile.  "If not, begone Cordy impersonator.  Before I call upon her to come down as the Messenger for the Powers That Be."  The demon gave him a scared look as a twinkling started and the real Cordy appeared.  "Am I in trouble for stepping out?"

"No, they *love* you stepping out.  Some day, Caleb will be you and start the great resurrection when the next really bad fan starts to blow evil winds."  She looked at the demon, snorting.  "I never would've worn that top.  It's ugly and makes me look flat chested."  The demon huffed but couldn't disappear.  "Nice wards."

"Yes they are."  He grinned.  "Any other good news?"

"Not yet.  They said to stay out of it this time.  Before they were pissed.  This time, it will end all the lines if you're involved.  Because there's no last one called now."

"Yes there is.  He's upstairs."  She gaped.  The other demon stared too.  He smirked.  "Didn't hear that part?"  He walked off.  "Have it, Cordy.  I don't want it here.  It might teach the girls bad habits like you would."

"Thank you."  She took it with her, back to her masters.  They'd have some fun pumping it for information that was blocked from their view.

Xander walked into the apartment again.  "Cordy has the demon well in tentacle."  He flopped down, taking Bobby to cuddle until he wiggled free then he snatched Caleb before he could sneak away.  "Ha, caught you," he said happily.

"Daaaaaaddddddddddd!"

"Tough, suck it up, son.  Some day you'll feel too old to be cuddled.  You'll be wrong and I'll pout you into it that day but you'll try really hard."  He gave him a squeeze then let him go.  "Cordy said something interesting.  They didn't know about the last delivery of D'Hoffryn's," he told Sam quietly.

"Very interesting.  Ours or yours?"  Xander nodded at Caleb.  "What happened?"

"Someone came to warn me that she was going to try to attack here.  Pity but Cordy has him well in tentacle."  Sam gave him a confused look.  "The Powers gave her visions but they were killing her.  She ended up going squid girl as their messenger."

"Eww but okay I guess.  Reasonable.  I'm glad mine aren't like that."

"Me too.  I'd miss having guy friends.  Hey, Dawn?" he called, bringing her out of her reading.  "Someone told me a prophecy about me not being surrounded by girls.  Have you ever seen it?"

"Yup, it's a minor attack, Xander.  Don't worry about it."  He pointed at the boys and then Sam.  "Ummmmm....  Well, it's not an attack here at least.  Let me tell Buffy the bad news that you being surrounded by girls to warp you had a reason."  She called up there.  "Um, phone's out."

"Crap," Xander said, calling Willow's cellphone.  If she was alive, she'd answer it somehow.  She was out of breath.  "Phones are down?"  He listened.  "Have fun, Wills.  You know the plans as well as I do.  She tried some intimidation but nothing too concrete yet.  Be safe."  He hung up.  "Blew up the campus.  Everyone's okay.  Someone was taking a nap and had a slayer dream about the old one blowing up so they evacuated."  Dawn let out a breath and relaxed, flopping back down again.  "They're going again tonight."

"Do they need me?"

"Willow said to stay here.  She's got part of the Devon Coven with her."

"Okay I can do that."  She went back to her studying.  Medical school didn't take into account apocalypse time.

Sam and Xander shared a look then Sam went to warn Dean and Xander went to check his weapons.  Just in case.  It was nerve wracking to sit out of the battle this time but he knew he had made the right choice.  He had to protect the kids and the Winchesters.  Funny how packs worked that way.

***

D'Hoffryn appeared to Xander, staring at what he was drawing on the ground of the park they were in.  "You're giving away all that protects your children for her?" he asked calmly.

Xander looked up then went back to drawing.  "It won't take all of it and other people can tell where I'm from.  It'll mask me better yet be useful at the same time."

"Are you sure of your choice?  In the past you've made bad ones.  Including sending a soul to hell."

Xander glared at him.  "It was the right choice at the right time.  Buffy couldn't fight him.  Willow wouldn't have been able to do that spell if she wasn't possessed.  I'm sorry I got in something's way that time but we'd have been without Buffy totally at that point and you know Faith wouldn't have lasted that long.  Seeing the ones after her?  We wouldn't have won the ascension.  Kennedy certainly wouldn't have been able to think outside the box well enough to deal with the issue."

"Good point," he admitted.  "Plus it taught that one humility and more about why he repents."

"I'm glad he's settled down in a life he likes, but I don't really care about Angel or Angelus, D'Hoffryn.  Why are you trying to stop me from draining some of the energy?"

"It can draw things here, Harris."

Xander snorted.  "Things are already here.  That's why I had a power hound come looking for me."  The demon grimaced, shaking his head.  "The same one that usually goes after Willow actually.  We tagged it you see."

"I had noticed that.  Very amusing."  He watched him.  "You forgot a line."

"You can't do that one until you step in.  I did learn enough ritual magic to know that."  He stepped into the figure and closed it, concentrating on letting some of the taint flow out of him while he made a heavy-handed wish.

"That's not a good idea," D'Hoffryn warned.  "All wishes are blessings and curses, boy.  You know that."

Xander grinned at him.  "That's what I'm counting on, D'Hoffryn."

He stared at the boy.  "You can't be hoping for the negative outcome."

He smirked.  "You're so sure about that?  It's gestalt, D'Hoffryn."  The demon gave him a horrified look, stepping back.  "But if you won't there's higher that will."

He stared at him.  "Fine but they'll know what you cast."

"She knows.  Willow asked me to."

"You do what that tainted one wants suddenly?"

"Only within reason."  He added the last sentence to his wish, making D'Hoffryn shudder but cast it since he had agreed.  He felt it take hold and glared at the boy.  "You made her impotent and unable to possess people?"

"Of course.  Like the First, half of her power is mind fucking."  He released more energy then sighed and got out of the figure once he had opened it.  "The energy flowing into me is so much nicer.  Now I can feel it again."

"It wasn't wise."

"I'm not wise and I probably won't make it to a wise old man, D'Hoffryn.  But I do know what I'm doing most of the time.  Even when you don't think I do.  That nice blessing of giving her back her own body means that she's trapped in it.  And she's ancient.  A more corporeal target that won't make Buffy kill an innocent."  He stepped closer.  "By the way, how did *they* not know about her?"

"I don't think they were paying attention.  Train him well in how to train, Harris."  He disappeared to watch this new interesting twist happen.

Xander grinned, nearly skipping off to his van so he could go home and relieve Sam from babysitting duties.

***

Buffy looked up as D'Hoffryn appeared.  "I heard about Willow's insane plan already and I was against it but I guess he did it anyway?"

"He did.  She was granted her own body back."

"Since she's so ancient, does that mean she's crumbling and dying?" she asked, scrunching her face up.

"No, but it does mean she can't possess people."

"Even better."  She gathered the scythe and her slayers, heading out to handle this last battle.  The military guys had been watching her place for them.   Now it was time for a final battle situation.  She did almost wish she had Xander with her but she'd handle it without her usual backup.  The girls were good.  Trained by the both of them good.  Dean and Sam had helped too.  Even the ones Faith had trained with Xander were good and waiting to help.  They'd be okay.

She hoped.

***

Xander looked up as a demon appeared, already smirking.  So he shot it.  "I can already smell the lies.  Hyena senses, you remember?"  The demon wailed as it died.  "Good."  He put the gun back down beside him and resisted the urge to call.  It was not a good time for a phone call.  It'd only interrupt the fight.  Dean patted him on the back as he walked behind him to clean up the mess.  "How much longer should it last?"

"No clue," Sam admitted.  "Hopefully not too long."  He and Dean shared a look.  "Dean?"

"No idea, Sammy.  However long it does it will.  No idea if we'll get real updates or not."

Xander looked at him.  "You guys signed up for a messenger service from Cleveland?"

"We've run into some less than evil mystical beings over the years."

"Good point.  Hey, Cordelia?" he called.  She growled as she appeared.  "Do they need weapons?  Because I can have Dawnie send some up."

"Won't help.  Unfortunately.  I'm cheerleading in finest Sunnydale fashion.  You mind?"

"I want updates," he told her.  "Because if they lose I'm next and I will be blowing all expectations and betting pools away."

She nodded.  "Good to know.  Thanks for the warning."  She disappeared, going back to watching the battle.  It was pretty even at the moment.  Hopefully something would turn the tide soon.  Which....  Huh, that was the original protégé of Xander who just appeared.  "You go girl," she said quietly.  She was almost praying that it would work.  Whatever insane plan Xander had come up with out of his belly button lint or his butt crack had to work this time.  Or else they were all doomed.

Dawn appeared and coughed, then opened the case in her hands, taking aim to blow out Lilith's altar.  The battle nearly stopped to stare at her.  She grinned and dropped the tube.  "Hi.  Did we forget that she has other backup?"  The demons tried to get her but she formed a wall between them.  It gave the slayer teams a bit of a rest break to catch their breath.  "Hey, sis."

"Dawn, you shouldn't be here."

"Shut up, Buffy.  I'm your sister, not your dog.  You can't tell me to sit and stay."  She looked around.  "Besides, there's... some fun coming."  She raised both hands, magically cutting the palms, spraying the blood on the demons before she hissed a few words.  They went up in flames.  Holy flames.  "Huh.  It did work.  The guy with the wings was right.  Oh, Buffy, she's corporeal.  She's got her own body back now.  She's fully killable."

"Wonderful.  Pull it down and let's go."  Dawn let the wall down and they attacked.  "Get the head one.  It's her real body!" she shouted.  Willow started to cast spells that way.  Dawn was focusing on the foot soldiers.  There were a hell of a lot of them and they were possessed so killing them would probably be wrong.

Dawn nearly got knocked down but got back up dusting her pants off.  "No groping," she ordered, kicking it on the head.  "Stupid demon."  She banished the demon then did a general banishing on the room.  More of the possessed ones fell to the spell.  They'd be out for a while.  She did it again until the troops were nearly a third of what they were before.  Buffy shot her a grin so she smirked back.  "Duck!" she called.  Willow fired a flame spell at the demon trying to pounce.   Dawn did the same thing.  Green fire came out, touching all the demons, making them all scream in misery and agony.  Except Lilith.  She was pissed.  Beyond livid really.  She was watching it all and unable to do much about anything.

Willow pulled Dawn closer.  "We can banish her too."

"We can't, Willow.  She's in her body.  We've got to kill it or trap it," she argued.  Willow gave her a horrified look.  "That's the original demon."

"The scythe should kill it."

"The scythe's only one weapon.  And it's a slayer weapon.  There's stronger.  Or we can bless it."

Willow nodded, sending a blessing at the blade.  Dawn did the same then created a wall between the rest of the troops and everyone else.  Now it was just them, Lilith, and the slayers.   "Good morning!" Dawn said cheerfully.  "How are you liking having your body back?"

"I'll destroy you for this," she sneered, standing up.

"I didn't wish it back, baby, but I can make sure it goes back to hell.  By the way, Dean said hi."  She pulled out a gun and shot her, making her scream when it hit her shoulder.  "Now, Buffy.  She's vulnerable."  Buffy lunged and got the demon at the same time Dawn shot a second shot.  Lilith fell with a wave of powerful magic knocking most everyone down.  She and Willow were grounded so they got to stay standing up.  She petted the colt.  "Good colt.  Very good baby."  She walked over to the demon queen, staring down at her.  "Pitiful, really pitiful.  Slayers with ordinary weapons and hunters without special skills took you down by thinking outside the box.  Truly pitiful.  But good for the light I guess since you're so pathetic."  She walked away.  Buffy was groaning but being helped up.  She helped steady her, giving her a pointed look.  "You need a bath.  You're nasty.  The girls would be horrified."

"I know."  She looked at herself then grimaced.  "I seriously need a good loofah."  She looked around.  "We good?" she called.

"Everyone's accounted for.  Two deaths," one of the military guys called.  "Both slayers protecting our people."

She nodded, swallowing hard.  "We'll bring them with us, guys.  They deserve it."  They walked out.  Buffy looked at the house.  "We should make sure."

"Buffy, there's innocents who didn't choose to be there," Dawn told her, getting her attention.  "They were possessed.  They had no idea.  If you burn them alive, you turn just as dark as what you've fought.  Get them help."

She stared at her little sister.  "Why are you so wise?"

"I got some advice from someone who came to Sam and Dean once about her last plans."  She winked.  "Almost cute and has really soft looking wings."  Buffy swallowed.  "Castliel said hi by the way."  She blipped off to take her own shower.  She did look nasty.

Buffy held back her tears, looking up then at the building.  "Clear it, let the military guys handle it," she told Willow.

"You can't...."

"I remember him, Willow.  From *then*.  If he says no, then I won't."  She walked away, going to think and maybe he might visit her too?  Maybe?  She felt the feeling of being hugged and looked back but no one was there.  "I guess that's kinda like a visit," she sighed.  "Some day soon though, I'll be back and you will be beaten at arm wrestling this time, mister."  She heard a quiet laugh and was cheered up again.  She went to shower and change.  She was the senior slayer.  She had to make a good impression on the girls.  They needed her to be strong since this was the second time they had lost slayers since the full calling and things weren't good right now.  Maybe he'd help by advising her what to do now.  Because she was kinda lost.  Last time Giles had arranged things.  This time, Giles was knocked back out and Xander was in charge but letting her handle stuff.  She was *so* lost.

"You'll do fine.  Like before," the voice whispered.  "Remember that you're not alone and slayers can work as a team, no matter what your instincts say.  What saved you is what you teach them so they learn the right ways to be warriors for the light.  Hopefully with a better dating record," he finished.

She looked up.  "It's not my fault I only like bad boys," she muttered.  "If I could draw good boys I would.  You know that."  She went back to her scrubbing.  "You really talked to Dean and Sam?  They seemed kinda nice and decent when they were up here.  So can you maybe make them want to have Xander and guard each other?"

"Relax, it will all work out as it should, Buffy."

"Yes, Castiel."  She felt another hug.  "But you're still losing our next arm wrestling match.  Slayer skills not following me into death or not."  Yeah, it'd be okay now.

***

Dean blinked as Dawn appeared, grimacing.  "Bad?"

"Done with.  Passed on the info and advice I was given for Buffy.  It's all solved."  She smiled.  "I need a good scrub."

"You're too young for me," he quipped back.  "Even if I can scrub very well."

"I'm not skanky enough for you according to your daughter, Dean.  Besides, I'm over my crush on bad boys like you and Xander.  Now, Sammy...."  She strolled off, acting like nothing was wrong.

"Eww!  Don't you dare make me messy!" Amanda complained.  "Ewwwww!  Daddy!"

"Welcome to slaying," Dawn said cheerfully, hitting them all with some slime on the way to her bath.  The girls deserved it.  It was breaking up their current evil planning session.

Xander shook his head.  "We've all been covered with worse but I think we could take a bath."  They ran for the bathroom.  For the first time in history, the kids wanted to take a bath so badly that they didn't fight, whine, or fuss about getting into the tub. They even tried to *share* it, even with the *boys*.  Xander and Dean shared a smirk but went to help them scrub off the slime.  That took experience.

***

Missy looked at her cohorts.  She loved having friends.  It was so cool when they liked her evil plans.  This one had even been from the nice guy.  She smugly walked up to her daddy and pushed him back into the room they had set up earlier with twinkies, sodas, M&M's, and some tacos Beth had gotten them.  It was all their favorite food so they wouldn't pout.  "Daddy, we need to talk."

"About what?"  He sat down, letting her stand on her own this time.

"I'm getting bigger."

"You can't have a sibling and I'll still fuss over you when you're twenty.  Like I do your uncle."

"Not the point, Daddy, you need more people to fuss over.  Whole lots more.  Plus, hyenas run in packs.  So we like the pack."  She walked off and the plan went off.  Bobby had found the sleeping gas canisters when Xander had let him into the armory to help him clean weapons.  Stealing one hadn't been that hard.  Stealing three wasn't that hard really.   Her cousin agreed that her daddy needed someone new to fuss over and turn from being girly girls.  Otherwise he'd pout that she was getting older.  Xander was led in there by Paka, who left and locked the door behind her.  Then she broke the lock with her slayer strength and stranded them in there.  Xander was now out thanks to the sleeping gas.  They'd wake up soon and fuss but they'd work it out eventually.  Then she'd have a non-skanky daddy and the other girls would have a human step-daddy.  Though they might still call them a mom now and then to make them splutter.  It was fun when they got frustrated.

***

Dean snapped awake, looking around.  "I'm going to paddle her until she's black and blue," he announced.

Xander moaned, lifting his head to blink at him.  "Make more sense.  Head fuzzy.  No thoughts."  His head thumped back down.

Dean smacked him on it.  "My daughter set us up.  This is her idea of us learning to get along so I'd give her you as a step-mother, Xander."

Xander snorted.  "Sam said she was evil."

"Yes she is," he said, appreciating it even if he was caught in the trap.  "How do we get out of here?"  He tested the door.  Stuck and locked.  Plus there seemed to be a padlock or something on it.  He checked the windows.  They were on the fifth story.  "Think she left us rope?"  He noticed the food.  "My girl's brilliant but too evil for a Winchester.  I'll have to spank that out of her."

Xander finally got up to come over and look then burst out laughing.  "Our favorite junk food, semi-real food, and sodas.  She expects us to be in here for a while I take it?"

"She expects us to do nasty things to each other so I have a wife," Dean corrected.

Xander shrugged.  "My hyena remains thinks of you guys like the pack already."  He laid down on the bed.  "My head still hurts.  Give me an hour?"

"Fine.  Where did they get the sleep gas?"

"Bobby was in the armory the last time I was in there."

"They're so paddled.  Sammy!" he bellowed.  Xander moaned and covered his head with a pillow.  "Sorry, Xander.  Sammy!"  He heard him come near the door.  "Sammy, our spawn locked me and Xander in here."

"I can see that.  His must've helped since the doorknob's broken and smashed a bit."  The door rattled.  "I can't get it open, Dean.  Even if I could pick the padlock.  Though I can't find my lock pick kit right now."

"They planned this, Sammy.  Missy got me in here and there's food and sodas in here."

"A bathroom?" Sam called.

"Yeah."

"I'll ground them until you can come out and spank them.  His too?"

"If they bent the knob, yeah," Xander called.  "Please ground mine too.  And Dawn if you can."  He put the pillow back over his face.

"I'll try, guys."  He went to find the girls and boys while the two adults fussed and fumed into better punishments than grounding, spanking, or KP duty.  He found the girls watching cartoons.  "Ladies," he said patiently.

Missy smiled up at him.  "Hi, Uncle Sam."

"Your innocent look isn't nearly as good as your dad's.  Wanna tell me what you were thinking?"

"I don't want a skanky ho with big breasts to be my stepmommy.  We like Uncle Xander for that and they needed a human step-mommy too.  It's for the best because we like being a pack.  This way nothing can tear the pack apart, even if we do have to go back on the road sometime."

"Your dad wants to beat you to death.  You know this, right?"

"He'll like Uncle Xander once he decides he doesn't need breasts.  They're a lot alike, Uncle Sam,"  Paka said with a beaming smile.

Adanne nodded to show her support.  "They are, even if Uncle Dean doesn't have a hyena cackling in his head now and then.  Plus we need more sisters to offset the evilness that's the brothers."

"Did Dawn help you guys?"

"Beth didn't know why she got us tacos but we're very lucky she did," Halla said with a happy grin for him.  "Now I've got you as a real uncle."

"Having them locked in the room isn't the same as a marriage, guys."

"It was in my tribe," Halla said firmly.  "Adanne's too.  We talked to people and they said it was usual when you got married."

"Usually the people want to be married.  I don't think Dean's wanting boys that way, girls."  He sat down, blocking the tv.  They all scowled.  He glared back.  "You're already grounded.  Let's not make it worse."

"I don't care if Daddy does send us to school with the mean nuns.  We need a human step-mommy who can help when the demons come after the older three," Bri told him firmly.  "B'letta's cool but even she said that sometime in the future she'll have to choose her clan over us.  We can't let that happen.  It's not right."  She smiled at their brilliance.  "Therefore we decided you were too nice and should have Auntie Dawn instead.  Do you want tacos too?"

"Locking adults in a room doesn't mean they're married or together.  Right now the dads are fussing and complaining, not getting together."

"So?" Adanne said with a small shrug.  "According to my tribe, they're still married.  I called the local consulate and asked about wedding rituals.  They told me all about it."

"How did you get that information?" he asked.

"I said it was for a school paper.  He said I'm very smart so I told him Daddy had adopted me from my tribe when it was attacked to keep me safe.  They said I sounded very smart and I would do great things."  She smiled.  "Don't you think I will?"

"Yes you will, Adanne, but right now you're still so very grounded for months."

She shrugged.  "We'll have homework again soon.  So?"

He flipped off the tv.  "That means no cartoons too."  They all sighed and went to find a book.  They knew Xander's rules about what to do when they were bored.  "Start on the workbooks again."

"We're out of them," Amanda said cheerfully.  "So we have to read."

"Then I want you guys to write me a report on what your books were about."  They pouted but went to do that.  He went to talk to the other guys.  "Guys?"

"Yeah, Sammy?" came through the door.  "Any luck getting us out?"

"You might have to take off the hinges.  Adanne and Halla decided that this is how their tribes consecrated and celebrated marriages, guys.  They've decided you're now married.  Adanne even called the local consulate to get info on tribal marriage customs, supposedly for a paper."

"They are so paddled for this," Xander assured him.  Then it sounded like he yawned.  "Sorry, sleeping gas was pretty strong."

"It's all right," Sam assured him.  "I did ground them.  They're working on book reports since they're out of workbook sheets to do.  Are the hinges in there and easy to knock out?"

Xander looked then made a disgusted noise.  "Recessed into the door.  Can't be removed from this side, Sam."

"This side either."

Xander looked at Dean then sighed.  "Move."  Sam moved out of the way, letting him and Dean kick the door out of the frame.  They came out after a few kicks, staring at his girls.  "I'd run and hide," he vowed.  They all squealed and ran.  "And not in the fun way either."

"Auntie Buffy will save us!" Adanne called, snatching Dawn's cellphone on her way to hide so she could call in some help.  "Daddy's so very pissed because we married him and Uncle Dean off," she babbled when it was answered.  "He's going to spank us, Auntie Buffy.  Help?"  She found a good hiding spot and hung up, making sure the phone wouldn't ring to show where she was.  Not that her father wouldn't find her.  He was a very good tracker.

Xander and Dean shared a look, then shook their heads, going to their own rooms.  They would deal with the evil little shits when they came out for dinner.

Sam shook his head on the way to warn Dawn.  "Adanne or someone grabbed your phone."

"Why?"

"Because they wanted reinforcements to save them from the fathers they locked in a room.  They decided that their tribes married people off that way so they're now married."

"Ahhhhhh," she said, looking confused.  "Whose bright idea was that?"

"The girls."

"Are they still able to walk?"

"So far.  Dean and Xander had to kick the door down."

"Sure.  That'll work.  Xander's going to get them so badly, Sam."

He smirked.  "They're grounded and supposed to be doing book reports."

"That's an evil punishment for those who like to read."  She summoned her phone magically, looking at it.  "Huh, she did call Buffy."  She put it into her pocket.  "Let them hide and get complacent then get them before dinner."

"Sure.  Are the boys in here?"

"I think they went to hide down in the office.  That way they could steal Beth's lifesavers."

"Good.  Glad they weren't in on it."  He went to check on the boys while she went to find all the girls and check on Xander.  "Boys."  They gave him guilty looks.  "Were you in on the girls' plans?"

"Plans?" Beth asked from her desk.

"They called the consulate after deciding to get Dean and Xander together.  They locked them in a room, Beth, and declared them married."

She burst out cackling.  "That's so evil."

"Missy and the mini-terrors planned it."  He looked at the boys.  "Head upstairs, do not help the girls get out of trouble or hide, and do not get in the way when the fathers spank later."  They nodded, going up there.   He and Beth shared a look.  "He'll get them."

"Xander's going to make them sorry in whole new ways, Sam."  She went back to her paperwork, spreading that rumor around.  The other secretaries and slayers who filled in would adore that story.

***

Xander walked his mini-terrors into the local Namibian consulate, nodding politely at the secretary.  "These are my daughters I adopted during my trip in Africa."  She smiled at them.  "We need someone to make sure they understand that locking someone in a room doesn't equal a real marriage.  This one called to see if it would," he said, patting her on the head.

"They're obviously very smart," she said.  "We have a priest in here visiting."

"Please," he agreed with a grin.  She got the visiting priest out and Xander pulled him aside to tell him what they had done and why.

The priest sat down with the girls to go over what marriage was and why you locked the new couple in a room by themselves, without going into detail.  They all pouted but they understood that it was wrong to try to force couples together.  Even if they did make a case that sounded like they suited each other.   He let Xander have them again, getting a handshake from the parent.  "They're very bright."

"Yes they are," he agreed, smiling at his girls.  "And very grounded.  For a very long time."  They all grimaced but nodded, looking down.  He looked at the priest.  "Are there any native style celebrations coming up that I can bring them to?  I think they'd like that once they're not grounded."

"We have a dinner and storytelling on International Day coming up," the secretary offered.  "That way more can learn about the tribes we have in our lands.  Many children like it.  Some natives who've moved come to cook as well."

"I might be able to help with that.  I spent months with each girl's family before we had to leave."  He patted them on the heads again.  "When is it?"

"In about three weeks."

"If they're good we can bring them that day and they can still be grounded."  She smiled at that.  "They deserve it this time.  They went evil."  He stared at them.  They slunk back some.  "Thank you."  He took that information flier and shook their hands again, walking them off.

"He's very odd," the priest said.  "But those girls are clearly stronger with him."  He looked at her.  "He's a watcher."

She nodded.  She knew what that meant.  "Are they?"  He nodded.  "So he's correcting evil thoughts."

"They did reason it out.  Provided enough food for a day or so.  They're very bright but very warped."  She laughed, nodding a bit.  "Thank you for getting them here.  It'll do good for them to go over their own history."

"There were rumors of a watcher traveling around helping villages," she reminded him.  "After the main council got destroyed."

"True, there was.  They still speak their native languages too.  I'm very impressed with how he's done that."  He went back to make notes for future teaching.  He was sure some other child would come up with that idea sometime.  Plus the other priests would love that story.

***

Xander looked at the newest set of forms.  "Beth, why isn't Giles doing these?"

"He's *recuperating*," she said blandly.

He looked up at her.  "Want a promotion?"

"No."  She smiled.  "I hate paperwork as much as you do.  Now sign those like a good boy so we cen let the other secretaries know."

He looked them over.  "Scouting reports?" he asked, looking over the largest stack clipped together.

"Yes, Xander.  From all the main branches."

He looked through them.  "Send those to the others so they know."

She gave him a look.  "The faxing is going to leave us a huge phone bill."

"Well, you could conference call and read it to them," he suggested dryly.  "I don't want anyone not informed of what's going on.  Since half the slayers think that computers are evil beings meant to ruin their nails and tempers and all the older watchers think that computers are worse than Satan, we can't email it."

"Good point.  Fine, I'll do what I can to track down their numbers and fax it to them somehow.  Do all the ones in the field have faxes?"

"Send it to the regional offices if you have one and make them responsible for passing it on," Dean said as he walked in.

Xander beamed at him.  "Want a fifty grand a year paycheck for you and Sam?  Paid health, dental, and tuition reimbursement for you guys and the kids?"

"Hell no," he said with a grin.  "We like traveling most of the time, Xander.  Sammy might like to settle down sometime soon but I'd kick his ass."

"We don't think the kids know that, right?" Beth asked him.

"Missy knows that if she did something to keep us from traveling, like popping the tires with one of our knives, she'd be in the deepest shit ever and she'd better start praying for divine intervention.  She knows the car was my first baby and she's the second.  She even used to get jealous when I'd pat the car."

"I'll make sure building security knows to watch out for them going after the car.  Just in case since the girls are so sneaky."

Sam leaned in.  "Is that why I took the hose they managed to get off the engine back earlier?" he asked with a grin.

"Excuse me?" Dean demanded, looking at his little brother.  Xander was laughing.  "It's not funny.  They probably talked yours into it."

"No probably about it.  The arms master out of Cleveland was showing all the kids how to make sure their engines were cleaned one day when he was changing his oil.  That's how they knew how to pop the hood, Dean.  Is she all right?"

"She's fine.  They managed to get a hose out of the clamps."  He looked at Dean.  "Your daughter's presently sitting in the corner in time out."  He grinned.  "She's pouting, got her arms crossed over her chest, and said that we were not moving away from her friends and pack members.  Since you're still married in their eyes, it won't happen."  He left so Dean could throw a fit.

"Excuse me, I think I need to beat my daughter senseless," Dean complained, heading up to yell at her.

Beth looked up as 'what were you thinking' floated down through the floor.  "They could use a mother figure, Xander."

"I had a girlfriend.  B'letta's very nice."

"She's demonic," she pointed out.  "Some of the old-line watchers hate that and want you quarantined."

"They can kiss my ass.  If we had more people I'd let her go talk with them."  She shuddered because she knew what his girlfriend was.  "By the way, she heard about their plan and came down to pout at them.  They explained it to her.  She was kind of amused at them and their mental skills."  He went back to signing.  "Giles will kill you when I make him take his job back," he said, handing over a few more.  "Anything else?"

"Just the school visits tomorrow."

"Thanks, Beth.  Have a good night once that's sent off.  I'm going to try to unwarp my own girls."  He got up and went upstairs, scowling at his kids.  "We do not touch Dean's car without him asking or suggesting, ladies.  It's wrong.  Dean's family has had that car since before he was your age.  Am I clear?"  They pouted but nodded.  "Right now no one's moving.  So quit your campaign before I find a boarding school."  They pouted but settled in to plan less evil things.

"I'm wondering if this new stubbornness was inherited or always there," Dean said, glaring at his daughter.

"She's always had it," Sam said, grinning at him.  "She's found a better target than denying the existence of green vegetables and getting her way about her hair."

"She doesn't fight against me that way usually."

"That's because she's got you wrapped around her finger," Sam said sarcastically.  "As proven by how she sucks up to you."

"Do not," Missy complained.  "He's my daddy!  He's supposed to be mine and I'm supposed to be spoiled by him."

"Little girls in time out do not speak," Sam said firmly.  She stuck her tongue out.  "Want another half an hour over there?"  She turned back around, still scowling.  "See," he told his brother.

"Yeah, I'm starting to see why you complained she's so evil too.  Missy, you knew better than to touch the car."

"We're not leaving the pack," she said.

"Missy."

"We're not leaving the pack!" she said more loudly.  Now she was really starting to get huffy.

"Melissa Mary Winchester," he said firmly.

"WE'RE NOT LEAVING THE PACK!" she shouted, turning to glare at him.  "You're married, you don't need to give me a skanky ho as a stepmommy!  We'll destroy her if you do so no one will want her anymore!"  She turned back around, starting to sniffle.

Xander looked at her.  "Who told you about the pack?"

"Bri," she sniffled.  "She said you'd adopt us into the pack so we could have two parents and do normal kid things too.  I don't like traveling."  She pouted at him.  "Won't you, Uncle Xander?"

"That's up to me, not him," Dean told her.

"Nah-uh.  The shaman told Adanne that he had the hyena mommy that made the pack.  That's why he took such good care of her."  She pouted at him.  "I hate traveling, Daddy.  There's never any friends and we never get to stay anywhere once we like it.  We like the pack."

Dean stared down at his little girl, sighing mentally.  "I hated it at your age too, Missy.  For right now we're not leaving Miami or the family here, but you still did the bad thing touching the car and trying to get me and Xander together against our wills.  We will be talking about this  later tonight."  She nodded, still pouting, looking miserable.  He gave her a short hug.  "Go back to your time out and then we'll talk about this stuff."

"Yes, Daddy.  I love you."

"Love you too, munchkin, but you're going a bit too nasty for my tastes."  He gave her a look then went to sit down by Sam.  Sam shrugged slightly.  "I know, we both felt the same way," he said quietly.

Xander stood up.  "All mine, c'mon.  We'll go down to the library."  They trooped after him.  All their books were down there.  He looked at Bobby, who was coming, then at Sam, who shook his head.  "Bobby, this is a Winchester talk.  You're one of them."

He pouted.  "I want a new book."

"We can pick a new book after we talk, son," Sam said.  His son beamed, coming over to hug him.  "Let me and Dean talk then we'll talk to you two."  He nodded, moving to straighten up the kid mess they had already made today.  "You don't have to do that."

"Yes I do.  Everett gets fussy if we leave things out too long.  He's against messy rooms."

"Is he OCD?" Dean asked Sam.

"No, he's just a bit cleaner than average.  He doesn't want to step on and break toys."  He leaned on the table.  "I wouldn't mind settling down semi-permanently, Dean," he said quietly, glancing at the kids trying not to listen in.  "I know we need to hunt but we can hunt out an area before moving on.  Miami has a good count of ghosts, poltergeists, and problems."

"I know.  I've been looking around.  I was thinking we needed to move into our own place now that the threat's gone."

"The threat's never gone," Sam reminded him.

"Yeah, but the bigger threat's gone, Sammy."

"True."  He considered it, looking at the kids, then at him.  "But I think they'd tie us up and move back."

"Could be," he admitted with a slight grin.  "She's definitely got more backbone than I had.  Dad would've killed our asses if we had pulled some of her recent stunts."

"Yeah, and then sent us to Bobby until his temper calmed down again."

"Yup."  He looked at the kids then at him.  "The other apartment is kinda small."

"Yeah, but we're used to sharing a room.  They're too old to share one now."

"So maybe finding our own apartment off-site?"

"Could," Sam agreed.

Beth came off the elevator with something.  "The school visit schedule tomorrow."

"No public ones?" Dean asked, looking at the list.

"Overcrowded, poorly funded, and overstressed teachers.  Missy needs someone who'll work her brilliant little mind in less evil directions instead of having to let her do a lot of her studying on her own."

"Xander did say he'd help us with tuition costs," Sam reminded him.

"I don't like sponging.  Having to do what we did on the road was one thing."

"Then let one of you sign on," she said dryly.  "We offer tuition reimbursement for the kids and you guys."  She patted them both on the cheeks.  "Because right now, we're the head office.  We have no researchers.  No one to handle problems if necessary.  No one to help Xander if we crop up a problem."

"What about Mr. Giles?" Sam asked dryly.

"He's off in la-la land rebuilding the building again.  He told us earlier he's concentrating on that and making sure all the girls are doing all right after this last attack.  The hellmouth was left more active than usual and they've got the UN's B-team helping.  Still.  They need all ten of their slayers up there to handle it.  He doesn't have time to do admin stuff.  Xander's his second.  Willow's head of the research council.  She said to hire you if possible so Xander has a researcher down here who can help him if the Southeast hits a problem."

"Is it likely?" Dean asked.

"There's a small hellmouth, very tiny compared to either Sunnydale or Cleveland, down in the Keys."

"We should probably be closer than Miami," Sam said, starting to frown.

"We can't be closer.  It's privately owned.  Miami has a demon community but it's small and patient.  Very quiet usually.  Orlando's is worse.  They've had a few vampire attacks recently but you have one girl there working at Universal Studios in some restaurant in her non-hunting hours."

"So we'd be responsible for Florida's problems?" Dean asked.

"Houston takes over to Mississippi.  We get New Orleans since there's some ties there.  Especially after Katrina.  Half of it split and went to Texas, half came this way."  They both nodded at that.  "So we get all the bayou problems too.  Up to about North Carolina."

"There's some hunters in those areas," Dean admitted.

"Which you can easily send stuff to," she reminded him.  "Before you got here, Xander sent on a ghost that was bothering a group home to one.  He was amused when Xander said he had tact from being surrounded by all the girls."

"So still some traveling but within about a day's drive, two at the most," Sam said.

"Which is better in case something serious starts.  New Orleans has something there that draws weird things.  Not a hellmouth and the Council never figured it out.  South Carolina has a small spot of it in Charleston."

"Which is why there's a hunter who lives about ten miles from there," Dean told her.  He looked at Sam.  "Temporary work?"

"I can like that idea.  Until something too big happens and we have to fade into the shadows to cover our butts."

"Dear, we're the Watchers Council.  Don't be stupid.  No one questions us when these things happen.  You'd have a nifty ID and almost every single department knows and hates us.  We were here as the US was building its government so they know to step out of our way unless we're doing things very wrongly.  That's why no one busts Xander for his weapons addiction."  She pinched them both on the cheeks.  "I can get the standard contracts for you guys to talk over."

"Please," Sam agreed.  "I probably will even if Dean doesn't.  Research can be done anywhere."

"Good point."  She went to dig one up and brought it back.  "Here you go.  Standard field watcher and standard researcher.  Now, if we lose the Cleveland team and full control comes down here, that would make you secondary head researcher.  The present secondary head is still in England cleaning up all the messes of the wills to get the stuff that should still be hidden back into our hands."  She left them alone.

Sam looked it over.  "Dental, eye care, nice salary.  Tuition reimbursement because the English system has a lot of private schools and they probably expected their people to use one if they didn't have their own specialized school."  He turned the page.  "Silence clause to keep us from talking about council business after we leave or during it.  Clause saying we won't use black magic while employed.  That's an interesting clause.  Wonder why."

"Probably some of the bad ones back in the day," Dean admitted.  He was reading over his. Sam snorted at something so he turned to the same page, skimming until he came to it.  "I wonder if they wrote an out for Xander's dating habits."

"No telling."   They held a silent conversation then took out pens and signed them.  They'd give them to Xander later.  "So," Sam said.

"Yeah."  He looked at the kids.  "She's still in deep shit for touching the Impala.  Dad would have killed me.  He nearly did the first time I tried to help him with the car and messed something up."

"I kinda remember him yelling at you for messing up the car.  Then getting a lot of lessons in how to take care of her."  Dean nodded.  "So what do we do?"

"I'll talk with her tonight," he assured him.  "You talk to your spawn?"

"My boy's okay but we can talk later on too."  That got a nod.  "Staying here?"

"We need more room, Sammy."

"Good point.  We'll start looking.  Maybe Dawn can ward it for us."

"Maybe.  If she's not too busy at the hospital with her hours."  He looked at the kids again.  "Missy, I doubt your time out is done with."

She shifted again.  "Have to use the bathroom, Daddy."

"Go and come right back," Sam ordered.  She nodded, going to do that.  He looked at his big brother.  "She has another hour."

"Good.  Gives me time to finish calming down my temper.  Did you put the hose back on?"  Sam pointed at it.  "I'll do it later with her.  That way I don't beat her.  Any other damage?"

"Not that I saw.  Since the hood pull's so hard one of the others probably helped."

"Xander's good at yelling at his own spawns of evil thoughts."

"True.  I'm sure they're having a talk in the library."  Someone came off the elevator.  "Hey, Henry.  We heard you were taking care of that ghost for us.  Thank you."

"Welcome, boys.  What's going on?"  Missy came out and sat back down in the corner.  "She in trouble?"

"Much trouble," Dean told him.  "What's going on?  New hunt?"

"Slight one.  You guys staying local for a bit?"

"It looks that way," Sam agreed.  "I signed on to do research for Xander and this group."

"That's good.   Bobby said you're a great researcher, Sam."  He smiled.  "Any other good news?"

"I guess I'll hunt with the team here," Dean told him.  "That way the kids can have some years in the same spot and quit fussing."  Missy cheered.  "Time outs are silent," he reminded her.  She shut up.  He looked at the hunter again.  "How bad's the new hunt?  Need help?"

"No.  Werewolf problems.  We heard there's a small preserve down here."

"You'd have to ask Beth or Xander," Dean told him.  "We're still learning the local areas."  He pulled out his phone to text Xander, getting one back.  "It's a safe, protected preserve for their nights changed."  He looked up.  "He said they don't get out to hurt others."

"Still not right to let them run free."

"I doubt you'd get Xander's help to stop that," Dean told him.  "From what we learned, Xander worked with one who tied himself up on those nights.  They were friends."

"Still wrong to let them go."  He stared the boys down.  "Your daddy would hate that you were going to stick up for that."

"No.  Dad left them alone unless they were actively hurting someone.  Dad hated pelt hunters, Henry.  He smacked a few around at the Roadhouse if I heard right."  Henry grimaced.  "We can't help you with that.  And I'd be very sorry if you did it.  Xander's going to protect any that are harmless and not doing anything."

"There's no such thing."

Bobby looked over from his playing quietly.  "Yes there are.  The Council's worked with a few demons over the years who're not only peaceful but have been very helpful.  Like during the  invasion in LA.  A lot of demons helped with that.  Halla told me so.  Buffy told her about it."

"Buffy?" he asked, almost sneering.

"The senior slayer," Sam said.  "Don't sneer at my kid, Henry.  I have Dad's temper, not Dean."  He backed up at that.  He stared at him.  "We won't help you take down things that aren't causing a problem.  If they're not out hunting or ripping up people, dogs, cats, alligators, or livestock, then they're clearly in control of it."

"Fine.  I'll be sure to let the others know."

"You do that," Dean agreed.  "Be damned if most of them would stick up for you anyway, Henry."  Xander came off the elevator.  "The preserve here good at keeping them out of trouble?"

"They have about five acres of woods.  They're open to any werewolf or other shape changer during their changes.  They have guards armed with tranqs in case one gets out.  When I was down getting that one slayer out of her mother's grasp, they had to get one that managed to get past the guards.  Got him less than a mile away before he attacked anything."

"You took one from her mother?" Dean asked.

"And the gang her mother was sleeping with and trying to offer her daughter to, yeah."

"Oh, good reason."  Xander grinned at that.  "You hear things about the old council."

"I know.  We hate them for that very reason.  Travers was on our 'kick ass first and then shoot in non-lethal ways' list while he was alive."  He looked at the hunter.  "Thank you for handling that ghost, but the Council is very firm on this.  If they're peaceful, more power to 'em as long as they're not causing strife within the demon community that would cause others to act in ways that would get human notice."  He stomped off in a huff.  He looked at them.  "Sorry if he was a friend," he said more quietly.

"It's cool.  We don't hunt things that aren't causing problems."

"We heard about pelt hunters back in Sunnydale.  One came after Oz."  He sat down.  "Did Beth talk you guys into it?"

"For now," Dean said.  "As a trial."

Xander squealed and hugged them both.  "Thank you!  It takes some of the job off my shoulders."  He straightened up.  "As a matter of respect, there's a lot we'll get but you guys might want to let the others know that the Council of old died thanks to the Bringers.  We're different now."

"I'll let the ones we work with know," Dean promised.

"Did you know there was a no dating demons clause?" Sam asked him.

Xander looked at it then shrugged.  "No one says anything to me, Sam.  If they did, I'd show them my last human date, Cordelia."  He gave him an evil smirk.  "I'm sure she'd agree that dating demons is better for everyone."

"You married Daddy," Missy reminded him.

"Being locked in a room is not a marriage, Missy.  Even if we had done what you guys wanted it still isn't a marriage.  Marriages come after dating and things.  In Africa they're sponsored by the parents of the person being married and the whole village.  Kids can't set up marriages for their parents.  I can marry off my girls... but I'm not that mean usually."  He grinned at Sam.  "Do you maybe like Dawn?  She's been moping that you're not reacting to her flirting."

"I do like her but I'm not sure if she's flirting or not."

"I'll tell her to be less subtle then."  He stood up.  "Any other decisions reached?"

"The place downstairs is really too small for us," Dean said.

"This one is for us too," Xander admitted.  "Which is why we were going to take over the old regional head's house very shortly."  He grinned.  "Once I get it cleaned out and rewarded by Dawn."  He walked off.  "It's huge and has a small guest house out back that would probably fit you guys.  Let me look it over for building problems."  He went to his room and came out with something.  "The girls think they're getting cookies tonight from Beth.  I have no idea why but what am I cooking for dinner?"

"Hamburger and stuff?" Sam suggested.  "It should go pretty far."  Xander nodded, going to handle that.  "How did the regional head's house survive the bringers?"

"It's owned by the Council and the things never came after him," Xander said, finding the hamburger and boxes of helper in the proper places, then moving them to the counter so he could get to work.  "The guy ended up dying when he heard the building in England got blown up.  Heart attack.  He was high on Travers' like list before you ask.  That's how he got to semi-retire to Florida on the Council's dime.  He bought the house, set up this building for slayers and visiting watchers.  Set up another couple of safe houses I still have to check out, and supposedly a vault for emergencies somewhere that I might have to argue with the police over.  He died so it left Beth in charge down here.  She started sending messages around to the others until she finally found Wesley in LA and told him what had happened.  Giles told her to hold on, once we solved this apocalypse we'd have new orders and probably a new head."  He looked back at them.  "Then surprise, he got named.  Which he doesn't really like but oh well."

"What sort of vault?" Dean asked.  "Weapons?"

"No clue.  I know he was embezzling some cash somewhere.  He had three extra employees who never existed.  Plus some contracting work that doesn't go back to any known company.  There's no telling what I'll find there."  He emptied the hamburger into the pan and got to work browning it.  "Bobby, Paka picked you out the next book in your series.  She'll bring it up when they've finally conned Beth into making them cookies tomorrow."  The boy laughed at that.  "Other than that, we know that Travers knew he was sponging off the Council to supposedly set up a new regional center.  He claimed the single slayer down here needed it.  Plus there were a few that could be brought here until their new watchers were chosen.  Since Carma's now in Thailand...."  He glanced back at them again with a grin.  "Beth pulled up everything so we can look it over after schools.  Is that schedule going to work for you guys?  It's in order of her preference."

"It should," Dean agreed, looking it over.  "Two hours, an hour for lunch.  Should it take that long to look over a school?"

"You'll want to look at their facilities, the classroom, maybe talk to the teacher, plus expect some time for the headmistress to grill you," Sam said.

"Beth said that's how long it took when she put her kid into a catholic school locally.  I have no idea.  I knew I wasn't going to permanently be in Cleveland so I didn't set up anything too permanent.  The bookstore could've went to one of the girls that wanted to escape the main building when I left.  The house was a rental too."

"Why not?" Sam asked.

"Because after so long together, we start to grate on each others' nerves.  Plus with the mini slayers I'd be going wherever they were stationed to learn from a more senior girl.  Plus me.  That means I'd be put back out as a field watcher eventually.  Not for the mini-terrors but for the senior girl.  You can't be a watcher to your own girls."

"That makes sense," Sam agreed.

"Yeah, it does," Dean agreed.  "So where were they talking about you going?"

"Here originally.  Or possibly to Germany.  Maybe to the one that's in Egypt but we couldn't be sure about that one with the state of things going on in central Africa.  All the wars and famines."

"Would the girls like to go back?"

"I think they would but they'd miss cartoons horribly," Xander said dryly.  "I've tried not to spoil them too much but I got overruled a lot by the older slayers who did spoil.  That's how all my girls learned about fashion, nail polish, and those things."

Dean laughed quietly.  "Figures.  Could they live in the field?"

"Yeah.  Even in Cleveland I took the whole horde out camping a lot.  That way the slayers remembered and the younger ones could handle it if something happened to me.  Because I know I'm a target now and then.  What protects them doesn't really fully protect me.  I'm just not sensible to attack for most people trying.  So I knew we'd be reassigned eventually."  He drained the grease out, adding the water and other stuff that went into it.  The girls trooped off the elevator.  Paka handed Bobby his book with a grin and sat down with her own.  "We all remember we have to do the school tours tomorrow?" he asked.

"Beth said we could stay," Halla pouted.  "That way you didn't have to drag us around."

"No, I'm dragging you guys with me.  That way we can make sure you like your new teachers."

"The uniforms are still icky, Daddy," Bri told him.

Xander gave her a dirty look.  "Tough."  She wilted.  He went back to cooking.  "Make sure you have something to wear tomorrow.  If not, I need to do laundry tonight."  They went to check, Bri laying out something for the older girls and Missy as well.

Dean gave her an amused look when she handed him the stack of clothes.  "Thank you, Bri."

"Welcome, Uncle Dean."  She smiled and went back to her book.  "Daddy, what're we going to whine to Auntie Dawn about you making us eat this time?"

"Hamburger helper.  The lasagna stuff."

She considered it.  "No veggies?"

He gave her a dirty look.  "For that, no dessert and you're definitely having vegetables.  That way you're not as short as Buffy is."  He went back to cooking, opening up a few cans of vegetables as well while the to her adults snickered.  Sometimes parenthood drove him nuts.  His girls were so spoiled.

"When did you want to look at that house and the vault?" Sam asked him, still grinning.

"I figure after the tours if we're not too tired.  Before then if we are."

"What about Henry?" Dean asked.

Xander smirked.  "The preserve has a seer on site."  They smirked back.  "They told me he was coming last night.  That's what that call was."

"Ah," Dean said.  "Any other news?"

"They said Bri's going to hate her uniform no matter which school we pick."

"Probably," Dean agreed.  "I don't much like uniforms either."

"It's that or a class with thirty other students," Xander told him.  "At the minimum, Dean.  My girls are too smart and they'll end up getting in trouble if their teachers can't pay attention and divert them when they start going into evil girl mode again.  I don't want to be a grandfather in ten years."

"Good point.  I'd better never be a grandfather," Sam said, looking at his son.  "You don't want to be a dad, right?"

"If I say no, can we not travel for a bit?"

Sam gave him a hug.  "We'll be talking about that later but for right now we're not traveling for a bit."  Bobby grinned at him.  "We'll email your Godfather tonight."  He nodded, going back to his book.

"Nerds," Dean muttered, shaking his head.  "Our kids were never book hounds before they met Xander."

Xander grinned.  "I'm so happy to corrupt them.  I wasn't a big reader either but I want my kids to be smarter than I was with less problems in high school."

"I can agree to that," Dean said.  He looked at the kids.  They weren't watching tv.  They were all reading books.  It was nearly unnatural.  Even Sammy had watched more tv than these kids did.

Xander pulled stuff off the stove, bowling up the vegetables.  "Guys, set the table."  They set things around the table once they had put all the leaves into it.  He brought out food, going back to make more.  Then he came back.  "Wash up."  They trooped into the bathrooms to wash up then came out to eat.  Even Missy.  She could go back to her time out after dinner.

***

Xander groaned when he saw someone waiting at the bunker's entrance.  "Lieutenant."

"Mr. Harris.  We heard that you found out about this."

"You could've told me."

"I had no idea that the old head didn't own it."

"Nope.  The Council does.  So now I've got to see how bad and what he embezzled for."

"He did?"

"He did.  Three extra employees worth."  Horatio winced.  "We have no idea what's in here."

"I'd prefer if it's something like drugs or higher weapons, that it be handed over."

"I can see drugs.  We can negotiate about the weapons," he told him, staring him down.  "Because there is that small spot in the Keys."  Horatio shuddered.  He found the keys Beth had found for him, opening the door and pressing in the code she had given him.  He opened and sniffed.  "Shit."  Horatio reached for his gun.  "There's at least one dead thing in here.  I can smell decomp."  He found the overhead lights and turned on the first one, looking at the small sealing hallway.  Horatio followed, hand still on his gun.  Xander opened the other door and found the light switch.  He flipped it on and paused, staring at it.  "Huh."  He stared at the piles then at Horatio.  "We had no idea.  He died before Sunnydale fell."

"I remember.  We've been waiting for someone to probate his will so we could get a legal search warrant to come in here and his house."

"I'm checking his house tomorrow.  Plus the other two safe areas he set up."  He walked around the bodies slumped over the table, clearly dead.  Clearly shot too.  He moved to look at the other things stacked around the room.  "Survival supplies are weak and really not what I'd expect."  He looked at the few weapons then found the cabinets.  "Ancient technology for weapons.  Some books.  Looks like a watcher built it," he said dryly.

"Did they tend to play with drugs?" Horatio asked, looking at the stack of blocks of cocaine.

"No, but he was an asshole.  We all knew he was an asshole.  Beth nearly hugged me when I came down and wasn't one of the old assholes."  Horatio smiled.  "So, what do we do?"

"The cash and things that aren't drugs would belong to the Council since you have proof he embezzled?"  Xander nodded.  "Then we can't confiscate it.  We would be confiscating the drugs and the bodies."

"Please do.  I don't want anything like that around mine."  He heard footsteps.  "Dean, there's bodies."

Dean leaned in.  "I smelled, dude.  That's sad."

"Very," Xander agreed.  "Let's move the cash, the weapons, and the books.  Then we'll let the nice lieutenant call his people to get the bodies and the drugs."

"Sure," Dean agreed, coming in to help him carefully move things under Horatio's watch.  "How much coke is that?"

"Probably close to a few million," Xander said.  Horatio gave him an odd look.  "I had to get the slayers some weapons on the underground, Lieutenant.  I'm not that naive."  He grinned.  "Some of the people I've dealt with in the past know about that too."  He finished carrying out books.  They came back for the cash and then locked the van up.  Dean could drive it back later.  "Okay, call your people.  We'll stay in case something comes in to eat them or something's hidden and activated by one of them."

"Thank you.  Do we think there might be?"  Xander shrugged.  "Good point."  He called dispatch to route some of his team and the ME to  his current location, then waited. The first one walked in.  "Calleigh, this is Xander Harris.  He's the new regional head of the Watchers Council."

Xander shook her hand.  "I've heard about your work on bullet identification, Miss Duquesne."

"You know weapons?"

He smiled.  "I'm the gear person the senior slayer used to lean on.  Now I'm the regional head of this office due to my kids."

"Good to know.  Are we going to have a problem with you and your weapons like we did with him buying some illegal things?"

"I have mine stored very carefully in case of apocalypse, I'm fully qualified to use anything I need to, and I'll give you fair warning first.  Where was he storing them since none were here?"

"I don't know."

"If you find out, I'd like to know, but we'll be searching them out.  I've already made arrangements with Lieutenant Caine about anything that should need to happen that we'd have to deal with."

"Good.  I like people with sense."  He pulled out a picture and showed it to her.  "They're adorable."

"They're evil little brats who think fashion is all that's important in the world," he said dryly.  "Who drive us nuts daily making up little evil plans to get me and my people together."  She burst out laughing.  He smirked.  "This is Dean.  He's signed on to be on our hunting staff."

"Nice to meet you," she said, shaking his hand.  "I hope you have sense too?"

"I do, and a daughter in his daughter's class.  She's being corrupted to the evil side by the other girls."

"Ah."  She smiled, walking over to the bodies.  "This is pretty.  I wonder which one shot the others."

Xander looked.  "None of those are at the angle to be self-inflicted."  They stared at him.  "Before rejoining the group in Cleveland I spent nine months traveling in Africa to rescue some of our girls.  I saw some of both and helped defend a few villages."

She nodded.  "You're right, none do look self-inflicted right off."  She looked around.  "What was removed?"

"Mystical books, the money he embezzled before he died, and the less than technological weapons.  We're staying in case he hid anything else that might bite you."

"Good.  I hate that stuff."  She looked up as the ME came in.  "Very nicely done, Alexx.  Very neat."

"I can see that.  Almost no blood."  She looked them over.  "It looks like the body's dehydrated."

"The vault wasn't airlocked," Xander told her.  "If that helps."

"It might.  The new owner who just found it?"

"Xander Harris, this used to belong to our former regional head."  She blinked a few times.  "I'm the regional head of the Watchers Council, ma'am."

"Oh."  She winced.  "So these guys?"  He shrugged.  "No idea?"

"No.  The last head died a few years ago."

"Interesting.  These aren't that old."

Xander smirked at her.  "As far as we know, no one was in the vault after he died.  Now, if he had a helper locally... who knows."

"Good."  She got to work making her preliminary notes.  The body haulers got them out of there, letting Calleigh and Horatio bag up the drugs while she followed the bodies.  She stopped in front of Xander.  "I've seen one of your people recently."  He quirked up an eyebrow.  "Simmons."

"David Simmons?"  She nodded.  "Huh.  We thought he went back to Bermuda and his retirement.  I'll let Giles know.  He's the full head.  Did anyone claim him?  I can have them do that."

"Please do.  He's taking up room for the next week then we'll release him to the county to bury."

"Yes, ma'am."  She nodded, leaving them alone.  He called.  "Giles, Xander.  David Simmons is in the Miami-Dade morgue.  I just opened the vault and found bodies so we had a short talk."  He listened.  "Yes, him.  I thought he went back to Bermuda.  No, not that I'm aware of.  Who did I miss?"  He nodded once.  "Okay.  I'll look into that.  Thank you."  He hung up.  "Miss Duquesne, do you have a mole on your left shoulder by chance?"

She stiffened.  "I was never called."

"When Willow activated all the slayers, you should have been."

"I wasn't."

"Can we check?  That way we make sure you're able to handle things if they come for you?  We're realistic.  Even if you don't take up the job, things can still feel you."  He stared at her until she nodded.  "Good.  Come to the office tomorrow?  There's a strength test that can tell and one drop of blood test.  If either register we'll hand over a training and information packet and let you come when you want or need training and help."

"You're not going to be pushy like the one that came for me when I was ten?"

He snorted.  "I found three in Africa that I'm raising, ma'am.  They're pre-teens."  She winced.  "There's over sixty of you.  If you don't want to take up the duty, that's your decision because you're reasonable enough to make it.  We will make sure you know how to take care of yourself in case you are jumped.  We will be there if you need us because something's been hunting you.  We won't make you go on patrols though."

"Thank you."  She gave him a slight smile.  "It's nice when people have sense."

"Isn't it though?" he said dryly.  "We'd like some of the old-liners to have some too."  She laughed.  "If I'm not at the office, have Beth call me.  I'll introduce you to my girls later."  She nodded.  He looked at Dean.  "He came back to hunt her down and have her told."

"Interesting.  Any others that got missed by Willow?"

"I think she intentionally didn't look for anyone over a certain age.  I'm not sure why though.  Giles is asking her.  If so she'll redo it and we'll see."

"Decent.  More students?"

"Only if they need and want it.  I'm sure her academy training will cover some of it."  She nodded at that.  So did Horatio.  "Plus I've heard and seen that she has a highly overprotective group around her."

"Very," Horatio agreed smugly.  "If something's hunting her, we'll get her to you."

"Of course.  And if someone else needs trained as a pro-tem watcher in case something happens, you can send them to us too."

"I can do that."  Xander smiled, pulling a gun and shooting the thing coming for Horatio's back.  He looked then at him.  "Thank you.  Warn me next time?"

"It would've went invisible."

"Ah."  He got back to work, letting them protect them.  Some very strange things happened around watchers so they knew not to expect normal occurrences.

***

Xander looked up as Beth put a call on speaker for him.  "What's up?" he asked.

"Xander, why didn't you go to New York?" Giles asked.

"Because the plan was for me to take over Miami or Houston, Giles.  My girls aren't old enough to handle New York.  Why would I go up to the International Flavors of  Hell city?"

"There's been a problem up there.  Simmons was right.  Willow missed some slayers that were older.  Three are up there and in danger."  He sighed, sounding frustrated.  "If Faith were still alive, I'd have sent her up there to talk to them and help them."

Xander looked at the phone.  "My girls are still too young for New York, Giles, but I can suggest that you send Willow up there.  A bit of a light show should prove it to them if they don't know it already exists."

"That's not a terrible idea.  Why am I getting printed reports?"

"Because not everyone wants to handwrite things.  Also, some people's scrawls are unreadable.  Typed is much neater and you can spell check it."

"Yes, but it costs us more when my assistant prints things out."

Xander glared at the phone.  "I'd rather have it printed from an email than miss a warning.  Have you gotten the last few scouting reports?  One of them listed something coming your way."

"Oh, dear Lord.  Abigail, where are the recent scouting reports?" he called.  Apparently she brought them because he hummed and you could hear pages turning on the other end of the line.  "I do see that.  Thank you."

"Not a problem.  I told Beth to make sure all scouting reports hit all slayer teams somehow.  Regional people passing them out or whatever.  That way no one's surprised when the Irish gypsy clan that wants to kill slayers for mystical rites shows up in Cleveland or New York.  But I can have a word with the police officer I worked with before to call up there.  That way they can subtly warn their own people."

"That would be nice.  I'll have Miss Chester send it to you immediately."  He cleared his throat.  "You did hire those two boys?"

"Yes I did.  Did you get my report this morning about the old regional head's emergency vault?"

"He had one?"

"Not only was he embezzling, he had some.  You'll want rolaids."

"I seem to live on them some days."  That report apparently got handed to him because he spluttered while turning pages this time.  "Cocaine?" he demanded.

"Oooh, yeah.  A good pile of bricks of white powder.  The local crime lab is very nice and I met them when I came down to get Carma."

"Wonderful.  Are we in trouble?"

"He's dead.  I'm just the new regional head guy.  They know this.  Found the one Simmons came looking for.  She's in the lab.  We talked last night for a bit while they were removing the drugs and bodies."

"Interesting.  Is she fully called?"

"She hasn't come in yet for the blood test or that strength test.  I'm assuming she will sometime today."

"Good."  Xander smiled at the sound of rubbing going on.  "Anything else I should know about that former person's problems?"

"I did a drive-by of the house.  Smelled more decomp so I'm going over there later with Dean and the crime lab.  Then the two safe houses.  If we find he had more areas, we'll call them too."

"They don't mind this?"

"No.  He's dead so they can't charge him with anything.  I didn't do it so they can't charge me.  They don't want the drugs or the bodies to sit there so it's all good.  They have some easy cases solved.  It looks like he shot the ones in the vault. They called earlier to ask Beth if he could use a gun.  Seems he could and he was very good at it.  Three of the four in the vault were known drug people too.  So yeah, they're not unhappy to gather the bodies for us."

"I can see that works for you.  Are you going to go to that mansion he bought?"

"We are.  My apartment only has four bedrooms.  Dean and Sam's only has three.  I figure the guest house out there has more than three so they can do that and we'll take the main house.  Dawn can go over the wards when she's got a free weekend."

"That's a sensible plan."  He cleared his throat again.  "Anything else I should know?"

"If you die I'm going to resurrect you so I don't have to do all your paperwork.  The First be damned."  He hung up on that cheerful note, hearing Beth laugh.  "I will.  I'm not becoming the full head of the Council.  Fuck that."

"Good.  I'd hate to be the top secretary.  She spends a lot of time forwarding things or dealing with twittering new people."  He grinned at her.  They understood each other perfectly on that point.  She brought in the fax when it showed up.  "New slayers called?"

"Willow never looked over the age of twenty."  She walked off groaning.  "Yeah, so that's why Simmons was in town when he died.  By the way, we can nag Duquesne at the crime lab if she doesn't come in."  She nodded, making a note she was due in for testing.  Xander got up.  "The tots from hellish boredom are with Dean.  Let me go talk to Horatio about the main house and this.  I'm sure he knows someone since he's from up there."  He left, taking the van to the crime lab.  Which made his poor van look like a trashy, ancient car.  It was but the lab was sparkly, shiny, and had that 'we're better than you'll ever be' air about it.   It had to be a remodel since the last time he was in it wasn't that bad.  He walked in and up to the receptionist.  "Hi, is Lieutenant Caine in?"

"College student thinking about being a CSI?" she asked with a smile.

"Regional head of the Watchers Council."  She blinked a few times.  "I know, we're all young now."  He grinned.  "It keeps us hip enough to hunt with the slayers."  She shuddered.  "I found some info he needs to tell someone up north about."

"I'll see if he's busy, sir."

"Thank you."  He went to sit down by one of the windows.  He saw Calleigh come in and scowl when she saw him.  "Not here for you today."

"Why are you here?"

"You weren't the only one she missed."  She rolled her eyes.  "Some are in New York and there's a nice clan of people who want to kill them.  I figured he'd know someone up there to tell."

"Probably.  None of you?"

"On maternity leave in New Hampshire at the moment.  She's with her mom until after she delivers."

"Pity."  She looked at him.  "Blood test?"

"One drop onto a special pad."  He patted himself down.  "If I had thought about it I'd have brought one.  I really didn't come to nag though," he offered with a grin.  "Are you coming tonight to see why the old guy's main house smells like decomp too?"

"Probably.  I think I'm on tonight."  She walked off shaking her head to talk to Horatio.  He was on a call so she waited.  He mouthed 'I heard'.  She shook her head so he finished up quickly.  "Not only was I not the only one missed, there's some in New York in danger but they don't have anyone up there.  They're on maternity leave out of the city.  He needs to know who to contact and who's coming tonight to help with the main house."

"You and Eric.  There's no telling how many bodies he left when he died."  She nodded at that.  He went to talk to him.  "Mr. Harris."

"Xander, please.  I'm not old enough to be a Mr. anything, Lieutenant."  He held up the list.  "Willow found them last night when she looked at the girls who didn't get poked with the crossbow of destiny."

"I know some of these names."  He looked at the note on the next page about what was going on up there.  "Where is your person up there?"

"New Hampshire until she delivers."

"I suppose that's a problem."

"Willow's on her way up, possibly with a few of the more junior girls.  We need to warn them to be more careful anyway."

"I can call the one I know.  I know the NYPD knows about the Council."  Xander nodded he knew that.  "Do we have anyone that can protect them if something should happen?"

"She's in Boston this week.  Her sister's being married."

"That could be a problem."

"Last time I heard, New York had a few officers who *knew*.  If they can help until someone gets up there it should be enough."

"Two are officers.  I'll talk to them as well.  Thank you for bringing this to my attention."

"I figured you'd know someone to call who'd at least know someone to call."  That got a smile.  "The house tonight?  When did you want to do it?"

"After our regular shift. That way my people won't be worried and overstressed."

"Sure.  The more the merrier."  He stood up.  "I have no idea how bad it is.  I didn't get past the secondary gate when I smelled it.  I have the feeling febreeze and a cleaning team isn't going to be good enough to fix it however."

"Probably not," he agreed.  "If it's that strong, there's no way it's a dead animal."

Xander grimaced.  "I'd like to beat his ass for this."  Horatio smiled.  "You have my number.  Call me and I'll meet you there when you're ready."

"I can do that."  He shook his hand, watching the young man walk off.   He looked at the receptionist.  "Did he tell you who he was?" he asked her.  She nodded quickly.  "If it's a problem, even if I'm not here, he is to find me.  If it's something less than a problem, decide and let me know when you can."

"Yes, sir.  Should we expect problems?"

"The last person who had his job had a bunker with drugs and dead bodies."  She shuddered.  "Apparently so does his main house."

"I'll let you know as soon as I can, Lieutenant.  He seems too nice to be one of them."

"The new Council has sense according to him.  He also has children."  She smiled.  "Eight children."  She shuddered again.  He smiled.  "Mostly girls even."  He walked off, going back to his office to find his personal phone book.  "The lovely Stella Bonasera.  Yes it is Horatio.  No, I need to talk to you and it's going to sound a bit odd.  Have you heard about the Watchers Council?"  He listened to her go off on them.  "Well, it seems that a few years back something happened that activated all the girls they missed."  She said something sarcastic.

"No, that same problem blew up the old building.  Very few of the old ones exist.  The new one is made up of people who were in the actual field.  When they went looking for women who were called over the age of twenty, a few interesting names came up.  Including yours."  She said something in Greek.  He smiled because he knew that swear word.  "I'm told that there's a problem near you.  I can send it up to you along with a list of people that need to know.  That way you can protect yourselves until someone gets up there to help you handle it.  She's on maternity leave."

He laughed.  "I'm told Miss Rosenburg is heading up.  That's on the note.  Let me fax it to you.  Where would you like it sent to?"  He put in that number and sent it off.  "There, it's sent."  He leaned back, listening to her go over it.  "I do know the local regional head down here.  He's very young but has a lot of sense and weapons skills.  We've had to talk a few times.  He's very intense but very good at what he does apparently.  Yes, Xander Harris.  How did you know?"  He listened to how she had run into him once while he was retrieving one girl from their area.  "That's about how I met him.  We had one down here in danger because of her mother.  He rescued her and got the whole situation cleared up legally and in jail."

Calleigh leaned in.  "Is that the lab up there?  Ask them if they got the results from that one bullet for me please?  I haven't gotten an email back yet on that crossover gun case."  She walked off again.

"Calleigh wanted to know if you had the crossover ballistics report done yet."  He smiled, making a note.  "I'll let her know it's on its way down via fax.  I don't know if Mac does know, Stella.  I know he suggested that there's some officers who deal with those issues when they occur and he suggested that you get in touch with them until someone can get up there."  He nodded once.  "That's true.  Mac is scarier than any of them.  If you wish.  I'll let him know.  We're going to be checking over the former regional head's house for the cause of the decomp smells.  No, there's a good reason."  He grimaced but let it clear up.  "Let me know if you need more help, Stella.  I can ask him.  Cleveland now.  A Mr. Giles is in charge.  Of course, let me know.  Have a better day, Stella."  He hung up, tipping his head back.  "Calleigh, expect a fax later this afternoon," he called.

"Thank you."

"You and Eric are going with me to the house."

"That's fine."

Horatio smiled.  She was taking the news fairly well.  He'd have thrown fits.  Of course, he was male so being called as a slayer was nearly impossible.  He hoped.

***

Calleigh got there first, finding Xander and a young girl standing there when she got out of the crime lab hummer.  She had long, straight, dark hair, skin that clearly said she was not Xander's biological daughter since it was closer to caramel or bronze than his own pale tones of white, and green eyes when she looked up at her.  "We needed a child?"

"Beth found something of his in the file archives.  He set the wards to slayer blood."  He pointed at her.  "This is Adanne.  One of the mini-terrors I'm raising."

"I could have...."

"In case you're not, she can.  Plus he said he put something in there that would be repelled by slayers.  She's been good.  She won't go near the bodies if there are any, and she'll sit quietly on the porch with me once we let you guys in."  She nodded at that.  "Are we waiting?"

"Horatio and Eric got stopped by a few lights behind me.  Let's go ahead and open the house up so they can jump right in.  That way she gets to bed on time."

Adanne pouted.  "I never get to see hell beasts anymore.  Not since Auntie Dawn quit sleepwalking around the house during finals."

Calleigh laughed.  "I'm hoping that they're wrong and there's none in there, Adanne."

"Me too but Daddy can slay anything.  He even got the tiger that tried to nibble on us one night while we were in Africa."

"That was good of him."  She looked at him.  "You're her watcher?"

"No, I'm her father.  Her and the other kids.  Her mother gave me custody of her."

"Why?"

"Because she was a slayer but she died in a battle to save our village.  They gave me to Daddy when he showed up to tell us why she got called suddenly."

"Why did we all get called?" Calleigh asked.

"During the battle against the First Evil, Willow activated all the slayers.  Locking her back inside the seal needed the blood of seven slayers."  Calleigh shuddered.  "There's over sixty of you now.  We had fifteen at the battle and lost four.  Plus a few others that weren't slayers."

"She's awfully young."

"I know that bad things come for slayers.  That's why I train and some day Daddy will fuss and whine and throw a fit when I have to start hunting.  But he'll trail me to make sure I'm okay my first few times.  After he scares my watcher to death to make sure he knows he's going into the field as my backup."

"That's right, I am," Xander agreed.  "Once you're out of high school, unless there's an emergency locally."  He smiled at the worried blonde woman.  "I'm truthful with them.  They have to know in case something comes up or something comes after them.  I'm very good at making sure she's training her butt as much as she can since she's already active."  Calleigh shuddered.  "The same things that come after you older ones can come after her and I can't be with her twenty-four/seven.  Most of the time, but not in school.  So she's training.  She knows she's not old enough yet to handle anything.  It's probably stealing some of her innocence but better that than to have her attacked at school by something that she didn't realize was out there."

"That's a good point.  How long has she been active?"

"Almost four years now," he said.  He gave her a slight smile.  "You probably had some dreams about the battle.  Most of the ones that weren't there did."

"I did have some shadowy dream with a scythe for some reason back that year."

"The slayer scythe is the special weapon of the line.  It was needed and what calls the next one in line."  He looked at the house.  "Okay, Adanne.  What did I tell you about blood magic?"

"Never do it unless it's absolutely necessary, make sure it's not chaos or black magic, and if you see it, start with holy water to make it stop and then move to fire if necessary."  She gave Calleigh a proud look.  "I only got those lessons last month from Auntie Dawn."

"That's good, sweetheart.  What do we need to do?"

Xander handed her his pocket knife.  "On the top and next step down.  A few drops."  She pricked her thumb, going to drip it there, then the next step down.  Then on the spot she could feel lower.  Then she came back to let her daddy kiss it once he had picked her up.  "Good girl.  Thank you."

"You're welcome.  There was a lower spot."

"I saw."

"It felt like the scythe."

"Interesting.  We'll have to have Auntie Dawn look at that."  She nodded, resting against his shoulder.  "Go ahead.  We'll be on the porch until you clear the entry.  Then she'll be on the porch and I'll make sure nothing attacks."  She nodded, heading up there with her case.  She carefully opened the door and looked inside with her flashlight shining around.  He looked over her shoulder.  "That's fresh blood," he muttered, putting her on the porch swing.  "Stay."  She nodded, curling up.  He grabbed his hunting pack from the van and came up behind Calleigh.  "There's got to be a decomp beast in here somewhere."

He moved carefully with her following.  He found the beast in the kitchen and pulled his knife, getting a direct hit when the thing turned to growl at him.  Another few came running in, but he had time to get out his crossbow and get them.  They moved upstairs, nothing but an altar that he'd have to have Dawn help with.  The half-basement reeked of blood once they opened the door to it.  "Guess it's a storage area," he said grimly.  He took her flashlight and squatted down to look through the hatch.  "Eww.  I can see bones sticking up."  He handed it back and went to look at a few walls that looked squishy to him.  He pressed on one.  Nasty smelling fluid that looked like old blood came up.  "I think we're going to need some renovations.  What the hell was he doing?"

Horatio walked in.  "You came in with her I hope?"

"She's staring in horror at the half-basement storage area.  Look at this."  He pressed, getting more fluid.

"That is not a good sign, no."  Horatio looked at him.  "The little girl?"

"Adanne is a fully active slayer.  He had the wards set to eat anyone that didn't drip some slayer blood on them first.  It also listed some things that would be coming for anyone who stepped in that a slayer could shoo off."  Horatio nodded once at that.  "I've already kissed her thumb better.  We'll be on the porch for a while in case something shows up after sundown."

"That would be helpful."

"Altar on the second floor that I'm not sure anyone should touch.  I need Dawn or Willow to look at it."  That got another nod.  He left them to it, going to sit beside his little girl.  "You did good, squirt."

"Thank you, Daddy.  Do we really have to go to the school with the nasty lady?"

"I thought we were going to Clayson."

"Their second grade teacher seemed mean to me."

"If she's mean to you I'll kick her ass, you know that."  She beamed at him.  "Do the best you can.  That's all I expect."

"Yes, Daddy.  Oooooooh, look."  She pointed.  "A swamp thingy."

Xander looked, then blinked a few times before getting off the porch and walking over there.  "Peace," he said in the demon language he had learned off Spike and Anya.  The demon hesitated.  "I'm the new regional watcher."  The demon bowed, keeping his eyes on him.  Xander bowed back.  "Do you protect here or did the last one have you linked here?"

"He had us moved here, Watcher."

Xander nodded.  "If you want to, you and any others are free to go.  My children and a few other hunters will be living here with us. We mean you no harm unless you're harmful to us, but I'm not going to keep you bound to the land."  The demon nodded, backing up a few steps.  "Are there more bodies buried anywhere?"

"No, Watcher.  Not here.  He had somewhere closer to my natural home for that."

"Can you tell me where?  The ones inside wish to have them buried properly."

The demon nodded, drawing with his finger in the dirt.  "There is where I live.  Here is where he was working rituals."

"Do we know what he was doing?"  He shook his head.  "Then I thank you for your service; I wish you a happy, peaceful life."  The demon nodded, bowing again before backing off then running.  Xander looked around.  "Hey, Horatio?"  Calleigh came off the porch where she had been watching.  "Cramps?"

She grimaced but nodded.  "I get them now and then.  All women do, Xander."

"Slayers get them when certain types of demons are around."  She moaned.  "Sorry.  The demon that I just freed from his slavery to the lands said he lives here, and the asshole who tied him here was working black magic there," he said with a point at the map.  "If it helps, he's naturally from a salty swamp area."

She squatted down to look at it.  "I know that area of the county.  We had a body found there a few months back but no idea why."

"I'm guessing whatever sort of magic he was working required a shitload of blood spilled."  She nodded.  "So let me know if you find something out there that needs to be handled."

"I will."  She stood up.  "You can go."

"No I can't.  Anything that'll show up will probably be about dark."  She grimaced but nodded.  "Besides, I need to check the guest house for Dean and Sam."  He grinned and they split up.  He took Adanne with him to check the other houses.  She took pictures of the map then went to tell Horatio.  He came out to make sure of where it was.  They had wondered about that body.

***

Xander walked in that night, putting Adanne down in her bed before coming out to join the other adults.  "He had demons enslaved to protect the grounds."  Sam grimaced.  "They found parts for over sixteen bodies.  An altar that has some scary shit on it that they won't touch until Dawn clears it, and some in the walls.  We're going to have to destroy the main house.  Fortunately there's the carriage house, a gardener's cottage, and the guest house.  The guest house has five bedrooms.  The carriage house has stairs, a huge garage, and four bedrooms.  The cottage has one bedroom and three rooms total."  Dean grinned at that.  "Neither one had magic taint that I could tell.  The carriage house is also where he was storing his apocalypse vault.  Mostly older weapons.  Some older guns.  One muzzle loader for some reason."  Dean grimaced but nodded.  "So up to you two."

"Carriage house," they said in unison.

"Does it have a kitchen?" Sam asked.

"Yeah, fully set up.  Some narrowish stairs to get up there from the garage but not too horrible and an external set of stairs that're better."

"That sounds decent.  How soon before they clear it of bodies?"

"They're going to demolish the house.  I pressed on a wall that was bowed out and it squished in that bad, looked like ancient blood way.  They're going to be there for days."

"So when do you think we can move in?" Sam asked.

"Dawn has this weekend off.  If she can go over it, both houses are out of the way of the main house."  That got a nod.  "So probably within the next week.  I did release all the slaves he had on the grounds.  Two told Horatio about where he was doing black magic."

"So he's spilled a lot of blood," Dean said.  Xander nodded.  "Anything else of note?"

"I got scowled at until Adanne told Horatio to quit scowling, that's what she did.  That she had begged and tied up her sisters so she could help tonight instead of them.  Calleigh asked her why so she told her.  They all were very impressed with her logical, reasonable points about needing to know and it not being dangerous with me there to protect her.  That if it needed slayer blood a small ouchie would only get her fussed over and cuddled.  She made some other good points about the training being good for her and made sure all her siblings would be safe.  She's finally decided having brothers is neat.  She told Eric all about her siblings.  He said Bri sounds like two of his sisters.  She's still calling them boy-things but he understood because he only grinned at that name."

"That's good then," Sam agreed.  "Any idea if his magic is going to come back and bite us on the ass?"

"Not yet.  I'm still trying to figure out what he was doing.  Horatio is bringing pictures of the altar tomorrow for Dawn to look at in case she needs to bring anything with her."

"Interesting."  He looked toward the shared adult room.  "She's down for a nap."

"She's working damn hard to keep good grades during her internship.  I'm proud of her and her mom would be too."  He smiled, shifting some.  "I guess I'm sleeping on the couch.  Thanks for babysitting, guys."

"Not a problem.  We couldn't get Bobby away from the other boys anyway," Dean told him.  Xander grinned at that.  "Let us head back to our own beds.  See you in the morning, Xander."

"Sure.  He took over the couch once they were gone, turning the tv on quietly so he could fall asleep to some noise.  Noise was always good to him anymore.

***

Horatio walked into the research center three days later, clearing his throat to get Sam's attention.  "I wanted to know if you could find out what he was supposedly trying to do magically."

"I need to know how they were killed, about when in case it corresponds to a certain calendar, and if anything specific was done, like marking, oiling, that stuff."

"I have that," he said, handing it over.  He sat down across from him. "I'm very worried that we'll find more spots."

Sam looked at the graphic pictures of what they had, getting up to get a few books to compare it to.  He found what he wanted, going over the ritual.  "Not quite it.  It deviates."  He went looking online for it.  That had it.  He pushed his laptop over so he could see it.

Horatio read over the reason behind the rite, then looked at him.  "Can he do that?"

"Probably not since it didn't fully work.  I have no idea why he was doing blood magic for protection rites.  It's an odd way of going about it and clearly not that reasonable in this case."

"Anyone who can kill over fifty people isn't usually reasonable, Sam."

"Good point."  He smiled some.  "I can look and see if there's any lingering things going on.  Make sure there's no spirits.  Dawn's going to look over the houses this weekend to make sure we can move in next week.  If I find that there's any hint of something else going on beyond this, I will let you know, Lieutenant."

"Thank you, Sam."  He stood up, taking the folder back.  "By the way, tell Xander that the ones in New York did become a problem but Stella found it and dealt with it in usual NYPD fashion.  They're not pleased but in custody."

"I can do that."  Horatio nodded, slipping into his sunglasses again before leaving the building.  He emailed that up to Xander since he was at his desk.  Then he got back to researching that rite.  Something had seemed screwy about it.  Black, blood magic didn't usually lead to protections.

***

Xander walked up to where Horatio was working, coughing and holding out something.  "His contact list," he said at the stare he got.  "All his buddies that he had on his email address book and his physical one he tried to hide.   I figure since one's the dealer you guys busted last night...."

Horatio took it with a smirk, looking it over.  "We really should find where he's hiding the rest of his weapons.  Three of these are weapons dealers."

Xander looked, then pointed.  "That one would've gotten him the archaic weapons.  That's who the Council buys the multi-tension, multi-shot crossbows from.  This one's into heavier weapons the last I heard and this one's the guy my contact in LA gave me."  He stepped back.  "He does gun and only guns.  Rifles, shotguns, handguns."

"That's very interesting.  Are you turning them over?"

"I can't help it if you're going to bust them on something you already have.  I'm not asking for special privileges.  If I need to buy for *our* armory, I go back to LA."

"That's good to know.  I haven't seen yours yet."

"Nor will you be.  If I die, Dean handles it, Lieutenant."  That got a single nod.  "Otherwise, half of those are girls.  Since Beth told me he was getting monthly 'scrips for Viagra that he got delivered to the office, maybe strippers, maybe pros.  Not real sure.  If any are pretty, let me know?"  He grinned.  "The girls are still trying to set me up with Dean."

Horatio smothered a smile.  "Your girls are very stubborn."

"Yes they are but you haven't seen Dean's daughter.  She's worse."  Horatio did laugh at that.  "Seriously.  Though, mine are smart enough to back up their trouble with facts.  Called the Namibian embassy to get facts on how to get us married by tribal customs."

"Your oldest is nearly eight, right?" Horatio asked.  Xander smirked and nodded.  "You've made them very smart."

"Thank you but I think they went past smart all the way to smart ass."  Horatio nodded he was probably right.  He grinned back.  "Anyway, the last sheet is his hidden bank account information and the information on what he stole from us.  Since we could account for that much in the first vault.....  Maybe that hidden vault out by his working area in the Everglades has something that he was dealing."

"I'll definitely look into it.  Thank you, Xander."  He looked around then at him.  "The markings on this one?"

Xander looked then at him.  "Wanna-be black mage.  Andrew's brother tried it a few times but if you've got power to back up the magic summoning he was doing you'd have been picking up demon dog refuse with parts instead of a whole body."

"So they're delusional and think they can use this body as a sacrifice to call something?" Horatio guessed.

"And they were probably alive when he did it," Xander agreed.  "If I had to guess, the person got frustrated and killed them for being unworthy since nothing happened.  I'd say seriously delusional.  Unfortunately I don't know all of your occult bookstores to find out where they got it from.  Sam would know which online sites they might've hit.  Though...  I'm going to say a teenage guy did it."

"Why would you say that?" Horatio asked.

"First, she's not too heavy for a lighter guy to do it, but she's clearly fashionable by her clothes.  She's got larger breasts, which guys would drool over.  She clearly didn't put on that outfit herself since the pushup bra is put on wrong.  Living surrounded by girls means I know this stuff.  She reminds me of my ex, Cordelia.  She was the head cheerleader and all that.  Kinda shallow when she wanted to be."  Horatio nodded.  "Most college aged guys and lesbians wouldn't go for her.  Someone who'd use her like a sugar daddy would wouldn't be involved in failed black magic.  By that age they know whether or not they have any gifts in that area.  They're more secure and would've killed her in a less messy way since it looks like multiple stab wounds, which would lead me back to anger at her being unworthy.  I'd also say teenage guy because even the slutty girls don't wear shoes like that," he said with a point.  "Those are stripper shoes.  Ones that don't fit her so he probably bought them for her.  Maybe the whole outfit since it's tacky and slutty."

"They are," Horatio said, looking at her from that point of view.

"Plus it's usually teens that play around with magic to see if they have any skills.  Usually they're looking for something to get them the girl that they want, attention, or something like that.  Those who're seriously interested start with regular Wicca or Druid studies and then move on.  Those who know that they have power and families run that way would've wiped her memory and let her loose somehow.  Maybe to embarrass her, maybe not."

"We have seen one girl that claimed she didn't know how she got into the outfit we found her in, that she didn't own it and hadn't been anywhere near that neighborhood.  We were thinking she was drugged but it was too late to tell the most common sources."

"It could've been but the traces would be long gone by then.  Unless it happened again or he put in the equivalent of a post-hypnotic suggestion that she go out like that now and then."

"No, not that she's said.  It was only last week."

Xander smirked.  "Who did she turn down to go to the prom?"  Horatio gave him an odd look.  "It's time for girls to be asked.  Some girls are brutal when they turn you down.  If she's in that age range, I'm betting she disappointed the guy.  Or some girl thought she stole hers."

"I'll definitely inquire along those lines."  He looked at the body.  "You may be right.  Would they need anything specific for that ritual?"

"Red crayon sorta thing to draw on her with.  Could've used a lip pencil.  Could've used a nail polish pen.  From here I can't see how precise their drawing was but that could've been a factor if he did have power but botched it."  Horatio shuddered.  "Be thankful you're not cleaning up the aftermath of the meal, Lieutenant.  It sucks worse."  He looked at the body.  "Thinking about it, check her school.  Someone there will definitely know who's been showing an interest in magic."  He looked at him again.  "Schools are great gossip factories."

"I'll do that later on.  Thank you for your help and this new information."

"Welcome.  The destruction crew we hired will be doing the house next week.  We'll call if we find more bodies he hid."

"Wonderful."  Xander grinned then left him alone to work.  He walked over, putting the information in his inner jacket pocket.  "Mr. Harris was dropping off some information on the former head person's contacts."  Eric grimaced.  He didn't really like Xander all that much.  "He pointed out that the probable doer in this case is probably a teenage male and probably someone she turned down or who wanted her but knew he couldn't have her."

"So he resorted to wanna-be black magic and stabbing?"

"He identified some of the marks.  They would've gotten her eaten if they had worked, Eric.  He said the stabbing was probably in frustration for it not working."

"Of course it didn't work.  Magic's not real," he pointed out.

Horatio looked at him.  "You'd have to take that up with him.  Not me, Eric."

"Whatever."  He went back to gathering information from around the body. Someone was sick and needed to be put down.  That was his opinion and he was sticking to it.

***

Xander looked at the hummer that was pulling into the grounds, waving at it.  Then he looked at the house.  Dawn was concentrating.  "I don't want you to wear yourself out."

"Then let me suck at your energy, Xander."  He shrugged, letting her have his hand.  He waved Eric back.  "Make sure the kids are out of the way."  Dean and Sam both nodded that they had the kids corralled inside a building.  She let out a deep breath and muttered something, raising a hand.  The former main building fell in as the walls collapsed.  She looked out.  "Not bad."

"Very.  Feel less stressed?" he teased.

"Much."  She gave him a hug then looked at Eric.  "Problems the Council can help you guys with?"

"Explosives?" he guessed.  He hadn't heard any explosions but you never knew with some plastique.

"No, magic."  She smiled.  "I just learned that spell last week.  It saves a lot on the destruction crew's costs."  She bounced off to play with the kids.

Xander grinned.  "The crew that'll be cleaning it up will be starting Monday.  They know to call you guys if they find hints of more bodies or parts."

"Thanks.  Did he have any files that might've led to some ID's?"

Xander shook his head.  "I looked over all the stuff he hid in our file archive.  Nothing like a victim list.  That contact list I gave Horatio was as close as we found."  He held his head as a vision started.

"Xander?" Dean asked.  He knew that sudden headache look.  "Sammy, help me sit him down."

"Guys, it's cool.  He has them," Dawn told him.  "He doesn't let anyone fuss."  They sat him down anyway.  She handed down her bottle of water when he came back.  "Good, bad?  Apocalypse?"

"Bad."  He blinked up at Eric, wiping the tears off.  "He has three more spots.  The files you want are in his hidden play area.  We got told about his minor working areas, not his major one.  Find me a map and mark their spots on it."  Eric nodded, going to do that.  He looked at Sam, smiling some.  "Pentacle.  Not protection for anyone but him.  Spilling blood to raise him to the level of power so he could fight the First if she showed up."

"How many more bodies?" Dean asked.

"There's at least seventy more I think.  Most in his major working area.  He was a meticulous note keeper it seemed."  He took the map with the new pen marks.  Sam handed him a pencil and a piece of paper to make straight lines with.  Xander traced it out with the three known points.  Then he drew the circle around it.  "That was the radius of the power.  It tied him to here but he thought it'd give him enough power in case he had to take out the reason that sank all his buddies in England."  He handed it back.  "Each of those points has another one.  His major working area is here," he said with a point.  "He chose to come south because he identified with the ideals of the south used in magical working."  He stood up with a groan.  "There's at least seventy more bodies.  I'm sorry."

"How do you know this?"

Xander shrugged.  "Ever since the insane preacher popped my eye, I've gotten visions."  Eric gave him a disbelieving look.  "It's real.  It's saved more than one life, including theirs."  He pointed at the kids trying to get past Dawn.  "I'm fine, girls.  Just a minor thing."

"Bullsnot," Paka said, knocking Dawn down so she could run out and hug him.  "Visions hurt, Daddy.  We know that."  She gave his waist a squeeze.  "Are you okay?  Do you need to lay down?  I know they can give you a headache."

"I'm good, sweetheart.  Thank you."  He grinned and she beamed back.  "Now go apologize to Dawn for knocking her down."

"Yes, Daddy."  She ran back to hug her auntie.  "Sorry.  I was worried.  I shouldn't have knocked you down."

"It's all right.  I did it a few times when he started to have them."  She gave her a hug. "Go back inside where it's safe.  Help Missy and Bobby decorate their rooms so their dads know what to buy them."  They ran back upstairs to play and talk about that.  She dusted herself off.  "We did a good job turning your girls into girly girls," she said with a grin for her buddy and big brother.

"You did.  That's why you get to take them *all* shopping."  He smirked at her groan.  "No shopping aunties down here except you."

"Yay.  We'll go shopping the next time I have a weekend off."

"We have to pick up uniforms later."

"Oooh.  But I guess I can help with that."  She looked at Eric.  He was still looking unhappy.  "We're the Watchers Council, what did you expect other than strange crap?"

He sighed, going to tell that to Horatio.  They'd have to check it, just in case he was right but he didn't want to believe in that stuff.

Xander looked up at the window, waving Everett down.  He needed a hug by the look on his face.  "We confused him with the vision and the magic."

"I guess it happens."  He looked up at him.  "Do they know?"

"Dean, Sam, and Dawn do," he said.  "No one else."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome."  He gave him a squeeze.  "Go play for now."  He nodded, heading up there.  "So," he said, looking at the guys.  "Furniture so we don't have to move out of the emergency apartments, uniforms, food.  Am I forgetting anything on our task list today?"

"Moving in," Dean said.   "That shouldn't take us too long as long as we can get furniture today."

"We should, it's before noon," Dawn said.  "So let's go there first since the kids won't start school for another week."  They nodded. "By the way, I can hear the word purple being argued over up there."

Dean moaned.  "My poor daughter is being warped."

"Bri was the one complaining about the purple," she told him.  "Missy's clearly doing the warping this time, Dean."  She smiled at Sam.  "Want them to pick out furniture and us pick out sheets, towels, that stuff?"

"We can do it all at the same place," he told her.  "That way we only have to make one trip."

"Good point.  Xander?"

He looked at her.  "I heard."

"Keys.  You're fuzzy headed after visions."  He sighed, handing them over.  "Thank you.  Shopping!" she bellowed.  The kids ran out, running for their respective booster seats.  She made sure all theirs were buckled up then slid in to drive while Xander got into the passenger's seat.  "The list goes furniture so we have something to sleep on, food, coming back here to put things up, then uniforms if they're open.  If not we'll go later this week."  The kids all nodded.  "You guys can argue over cute things while we do furniture."  She backed the van out of the driveway to the turn-around, heading off to downtown Miami.  Surely there was a decent, lower priced furniture store somewhere around here.

***

Bri ran for the pet store when they got out to get groceries.  "Daddy!" she squealed, bouncing up and down.

"No," he called.  "If you want to eat this week, get back here."

"They have puppies!" she told him.  "Cute puppies!"

He looked at her.  "No.  Come on."  She pouted.  He stared.  She trudged over.  "We'll talk about a pet later on.  Not when we've just moved in."  He got the kids arranged how he wanted them.  "Fruits, veggies, meats, milk, cheese, bread, eggs, frozen stuff."  They all nodded that they'd remember it for him.  He walked them inside, taking them that way.  They kept him out of the twinkie and chip aisle and he kept them out of the ice cream.  It worked well that way.

"Chicken wings!" Everett called with a point.  "All natural, free range ones, Daddy."

Xander patted him on the head.  "Expensive."

"You're not usually like Uncle Dean," he said with a scowl.  "It's better for you.  They said so."

Xander sighed, looking at them.  "There's only sixteen in the package, Everett.  You can eat that many by yourself.  It makes more sense to buy the big bag."

"But you don't know what the chickens had.  They could have that coughing, flu thingy they talk about on tv."  A nearby mother laughed so he scowled.  "They could!"

Xander looked at him.  "How about this.  There's some local chicken that's sold here.   It's halfway in-between McDonald's chicken and the expensive yuppie food.  Would that work?"  They all cheered at that so he got some of those in wings.  It was slightly more expensive but if he didn't, Everett and therefore Bri wouldn't eat.  She'd stick up for his food boycott again.  "Yogurt?"

"Not on the list," Bri said.  "We don't like it, Daddy."

"It goes in that sauce you like on goat," he said patiently.  She sighed.  He got some and some goat.  They had that there.   Long live yuppie food marts!  They finished up, getting a smile from the cashier.  "Yes, all mine."

"Their mother taking the day off?"

"No, we want him to marry Uncle Dean," Amanda said.

"Am," Xander complained.  The cashier just laughed, smiling and patting her on the head.  "Thanks."  He handed over his coupons and didn't quite wince at the total.  His kids were expensive pets to keep sometimes.  He took the groceries out to the van, letting the kids get themselves in.  "Bri, I see you sneaking off.  Grounded and in the corner for an hour tonight, young lady.  That's dangerous.  Get your butt back in the van."  She slunk back, making him stare at the pouting slayer.  "No, Halla.  In the van.  Grounded too."  She stomped that way, pouting the whole time.  "You know better than to walk off.  Tough."  He made sure they were all buckled in then locked them in so he could load the groceries into the back.  He put the cart back and got in to drive, looking at them.  "Do it again, watch me spank.  You don't know what could happen."  They all nodded.  "We've had the talk about strangers and bad people, guys."  He backed out, heading back to the house.   He handed both of those to Dawn.  "An hour in the corner.  They tried to wander off at the store."

"Guys, that's dangerous," she complained, taking them up to sit them in the corner.  She came back down.  "Beds are here but not the second load."

"It happens."  He handed the kids the lighter stuff to carry for him, letting him and Dawn get the rest.  Same came bouncing up a few minutes later.  "Hey."

"Hey."  He looked at what they were unpacking.  "Goat?"

Xander nodded.  "I make an excellent goat dish."  He smiled.  "The kids all love it and so did Dean when I made it last week."  Sam beamed at that.  "He thought it was lamb."  He put that into the freezer.  "I'll do that next weekend since it has to marinade."  He put the chicken wings into the fridge.  "Everett begged."  Dawn smiled.  "Okay, did I forget anything?"

"Nope," she assured him.  Someone knocked.  Caleb went running.  "If it's the furniture guys, let them in.  No one else but family."

"It's the furniture guys," he called a minute later.  "I asked first."  He came running back to them to get a hug.  "I asked and asked for ID."

"Good boy," Xander praised, getting a grin and him running off to find his toys.  "Did we get the apartment cleared up?"

"Not yet, I've been waiting on furniture for you."

"Let me do that while you arrange this?"

She snorted.  "Packing takes me less time than it does you, Xander.  Even the books."  She waved at the furniture guys.  "Hey, guys."

"We have stuff for the other family out here, and a second truck waiting for your stuff," he told her.

"I'm here for that," Sam told him, taking him over there.  He had to frown at a few things.  Somehow Missy had snuck in a furry lamp?  And Bobby had snuck in two beanbag chairs?  Interesting choices their kids made.  Dean got back with their stuff and groceries, taking the time to shrug at his daughter's room.  If she wanted a purple fuzzy lamp and it was on sale, so be it.  This time.  "Bri and Halla are in corners."

"What did they do?"

"Didn't hear that part.  Probably went to look at something."  That got a nod.  "Dawn said she'd pack their stuff."

"That packing spell is really handy," Dean agreed.  "Any other good news?"

"Beanbag chairs?"

"So he can sit and read in them.  Or so he said."

"Ah."  Sam nodded.  "He's using logic at least."

"He was," Dean agreed.  "Any other surprises?"

"Not yet."

"Did anything in Xander's background say that he had visions?"

"Something or someone called him The One Who Sees."

"So we weren't sure?"

"Nope.  Apparently his are less intense than some of mine were.  I'd still be on the ground with the migraine."

"True."  He gave his brother a pat on the arm.  "I got beers for later."

"That'll work."  They went to put up their kids' clothes.  He could hear Missy being fussy with how things were hung up but that was her being a girl Sam guessed.  Bobby wasn't that picky as long as they weren't too smelly and dirty.  Sometimes Sam didn't understand girls at all.

Xander tapped before walking in.  "It's me," he called.  He came up the stairs, handing over keys and a folded note.  "We're changing the gate lock in a minute and the code.  That's the new ones."  That got a grin from Dean.  Missy was still huffing.  "Nap time?"

"Possibly.  Your head okay?"

"Fine.  I had to learn to do without anything to help ease it.  Tylenol sure doesn't work on them."  He grinned.  "Missy, why are you fussing?"

"They're not in color wheel order," she called.  "Can Bri help?"

"Bri's grounded for the rest of the day because she tried to sneak off."  Dean winced.  "A pet store had puppies."

"I've spanked for wandering off in the past," he admitted.  "Right into the road to pet a stray dog."

"Oh, yeah, been there," Xander agreed, nodding some.  "Adanne is the worst about it usually."  He looked around.  "Color wheel is rainbow order, Dean.  It'll make her quit fussing."

"I told her to arrange things to her heart's content since I wasn't doing it right.  Is she the bad influence on Bri or is Bri the bad influence?"

"I think it's the shopping aunties' fault."  Dean burst out laughing.  "Clearly it had to be.  They're the ones who taught my girls about nail polish, the Gap, Victoria's Secret.  Which made for an interesting conversation with a three-year-old who wanted a push up bra.   They spread it to your girl because Bri's going to make a cult of fashion some year soon."  He walked off while Dean cackled.  It was good to spread cheer.

Dean walked into his daughter's room, finding her on a chair rearranging the top of her closet.  He put her back onto the floor.  "It's fine."

"It's messy."

"It's fine."  He stared her down.  "We aren't leaving for a while.  At least until the end of the school year.  Calm down."  She nodded, going to lay on her bed.  He gave her a hug.  "I remember how hard traveling and hunting was on us when we were your age, Missy.  So calm down and talk to me about this stuff instead of breaking out in fussing.  Or if you want to have a good cry, go to your Uncle.  He's used to emo stuff."

She gave him a better hug.  "We can stay for a long time?"

"I'm not sure how long but so far it seems okay."  She nodded, smiling at him.  "Now, take a nap.  You've worn yourself out fussing."

"Have not."

"Have too.  Take a nap or lay there and read for a bit."  She sighed but nodded, getting her littler books that she could read on her own.  Dean walked out, going to find Sam.  "Bobby fussing things into place?"

"Yup, but we had a talk about this being for a long time and he calmed down."

"That was why she was fussing too."  They each got a beer and went to straighten out their own stuff.  They didn't care if it was messy or not but the Missy would try to rearrange things on them if it was too messy.

***

The kids' new kindergarten teacher smiled as Xander came in, shocked that he was white.  "Mr. Harris?"  He nodded, shaking her hand.  "Your girls had an interesting first day so I thought we should talk."

"Big problems or little ones?"

"Well, one bigger one but a few questions were asked by other parents because they don't want to seem rude and ask the children themselves yet they don't want to embarrass anyone either.  Were the older three girls you have from a different relationship than your twins?"

Xander smiled.  "No.  I was traveling around Africa for nine months and helped their villages out with some attacks.  Their mothers gave me custody so I could protect the girls."

"Oh, I see.  Peace Corps?"

"No, I was there technically on work matters but I was also there working out some grief issues.  I had just lost my last fiancée before that trip."

"I'm sorry.  Um, so they're not mixed racially?  Some parents are very sensitive and worried that they'd upset the children's parentage by guessing."

"Well Halla's mom was a Peace Corps member that fell in love and stayed over there with her new spouse.  We have no idea where the white hair comes from since her mom's a brunette.  The other two girls, as far as I know, have black fathers as well as mothers."

"That's wonderful.  I can let that be known.  Are any...sensitive about those things?  I know adoption cases can sometimes be very sensitive about their real families."

"I've had those three since they were all very young.  I got Halla at a later age than the other two.  You haven't had fun until you've tried to potty train a child in the middle of a desert."

She gave a delicate shudder.  "My own was bad enough here where I could bribe him."

"Adanne and Paka like to bite when they're frustrated.  They spent a lot of time biting me in those days for fun and a reward."  He grinned.  "They're a bit strange now and then but all kids are strange at that age."

"Their villages participated in some form of cannibalism?"

"No, they thought blood tasted good.  Adanne's village does usually eat its meat fire-baked to rare instead of stewed or anything.  Personally I think she taught Paka to bite.  Paka was barely weaned when I was given her by her mom."

"Interesting."  She made another note.  "I'm sure you know we have parent days when parents come in to tell the students about things in their lives.  Would you come in to tell the children about some of your travels?  They'd probably find it fascinating and we could use it to talk a bit about other cultures and Africa."

He winced.  "I'm not sure what I'd be able to tame down to tell them about.  I was traveling around looking over students for the group I work with.  I helped their villages when they were attacked.  Usually by some sort of civil or clan issue that was going to spread into a war.  It was a lot of thin rations, dirty days of walking in the dust, and getting to know the girls.  I did spend some time in a few villages so I could probably tell them about the daily life stuff but I'm not sure I can tame down some things like hunting down your own food.  If parents are sensitive enough to be worried about insulting my girls because they're African, telling them about hunting down gazelles for dinner might send them into a stroke."

"True.  We'll see if we can work out something, like about village life?"  He nodded at that.  "Do you have any pictures?"

"I have a lot of pictures.  I'll have to weed out a few where I had obvious injuries but I do have some.  We kinda had to hunt a tiger that kept attacking Paka's village."

"Ow.  Badly injured?  I noticed your eye patch but I wasn't going to ask."

"That happened before I left for Africa, but no.  I had a lot of very deep cuts.  The thing made it into the hut we were in that night."  She gave him a horrified look.  "I had a hunting knife on me and I'm actually a fairly decent hunter.  Not like goes for deer or gators because I only hunt for food, but I can when necessary."

"That's interesting.  There is a group of parents who do hunt."

"I only hunt for food if I go.  I'd probably say something to insult those who go for heads on the wall.  I learned to respect the lands and what they hold."

"We had noticed the girls seem to be moderately pagan in religious things.  Briony muttered 'Goddess protect my eyes from the paisley' at one teacher's outfit before lunch."

"I technically am.  Their favorite aunt is too.  We don't actually teach them but them calling out to the Goddess for patience and things comes from watching us do it."  She smiled and nodded.  He grinned back.  "If any parents get huffy, you can tell them I adopted African children before it became popular if you want.  I'll try to keep my girls from snarking back at them in Swahili.  Because they can and will if someone starts to annoy them."

She nodded.  "One child got it today when they picked on Briony.  You taught the others?"

"Of course.  Latin, Ancient Greek, Swahili, English, and I was learning some Russian in Cleveland due to some new research materials we were working with."

"What do you do anyway?"

"I work with a multi-national, research-oriented council.  I'm the regional head in case something new comes up in a dig or something."

"Will you be going on any?"

"Not usually though all my girls do know how to camp.  I made sure of it in case it became necessary.  They're spoiled but not that spoiled."

"I noticed Briony was very fashionably turned out today."

"She was warped by all the shopping aunties up in Cleveland."

"She was well read too."

He smiled.  "Thank you.  I was running a bookstore when I wasn't teaching self defense and helping up in the Cleveland branch.  My kids all know how to read, even the youngest three."

"You have three more?" she asked.  He had eight?  She could barely handle one.

He nodded.  "Their mother died in a car crash and left me her triplets.  I was her ex.  My only boys and another girl."  He pulled out a picture to show her.

"They're adorable."  She handed it back.  "Did Briony pick out clothes for everyone?"

"She fussed for hours," he admitted dryly.  "She's got imperfect hair fussing too."

"She took down her ponytail earlier after lunch to brush it out again.  She fussed until all the little strands were back in it.  Amanda and Missy rolled their eyes at her fussing."

"Bri's warping Missy into a girly girl too.  Her and Bobby's dads work with me.  We live on the old head's estate right now in different houses."

"I had heard that."  She handed over a letter.  "Is Mr. Winchester available?  I know I called for him as well about the bigger problem."

"He'll be back after he takes my horde home."  He texted him, getting an ETA back.  "He said it'll be about five more minutes."

"That's fine.  Really, the bigger problems weren't that bad.  They were trying to be good and it got a bit frustrating earlier for another child."

"How would it get frustrating for another child?"  Dean and Missy walked in.  "Made good time."

"Sped up the last few blocks."  He sat down with her in his lap.  "So, what happened today that we get called in a parent-teacher conference already?"

"As I was telling Mr. Harris, it's not really a *problem* but it is in a few ways.  You see, they won't say another child's name."

"Daddy said it's a bad thing to say that word," Missy said firmly. "I'm not going to be grounded for saying that word, Mrs. Perkins."

Dean gave her a look then the teacher.  "Someone named their kid a swear word?"

"She claims it's French.  She named him Azholee, as she pronounced it."

Xander shook his head.  "So she named her kid asshole?" he guessed.

"Indeed."

"Yeah, Bri knows she'd get grounded and without cartoons for saying that word."

Dean barely kept from laughing.  "I thought parents doing that was an urban legend.  Like parents naming their kids after what they were craving during their pregnancy."

"No, she's the second we've had."

"Yuppie scum with delusions of being cool?" Dean guessed.  The teacher tried not to laugh.  Xander nodded though.  He looked at Missy.  "You're right, I don't want you saying that word.  We'll figure something out so you don't have to."  He looked at the teacher.  "Any nicknames by chance?"

"No and the mother's highly against them."

"What she doesn't know will save her kid from being picked on later by bullies," Xander said dryly.

"We thought so too but she is quite huffy."

"If you want, you can tell her I gave my kid permission to call her kid Big A or something instead so they don't get in trouble for swearing and then refer her to me so I can bust her bubble about the world caring," Dean offered.  He looked at his daughter.  "Would that work for you kids?  Calling that one Big A or some other name you guys work out with him?"

She nodded.  "We talked to him at lunch.  He knows that not everyone likes his name.  He didn't know why until Bri told him it was a swear word and not French but then he understood.  He said he pouted at his mom in the past for it."

"He can change it when he's older," Xander assured her.  "Did you guys work that out between yourselves?"

"No.  We told him why we wouldn't say his name and he understood after we told him why.  Amanda even hugged him.  Adanne told a bully to leave him alone on the playground too, Uncle Xander."

"That's very cool of her.  Did she get into a fight?"

"No, she glared until he walked off laughing.  Then she swore at him in Swahili until he looked very confused.  She walked off looking smug after she called him elephant turds."  She beamed.  "One of the teachers was laughing her butt off about that."

"We do have one teacher that does speak Swahili.  She adopted a child from upper Africa a few years back and had to learn to communicate with him," the teacher agreed. "Is that what she called him?"

"Among other things," Missy said dryly.  "Paka translated for Bobby and I because they haven't taught us that many words yet."

"I'll talk with her later," Xander told her.  He patted her on the head. "Report bullies.  The school has a no tolerance policy on bullying."

"Yes, Uncle Xander."  She smiled at the teacher then at her father.  "Daddy, why don't we drive cars like some of the other kids?"

"Because the Impala's been in the family since my dad got her.  She's special and a classic.  Some of the modern cars are expensive pieces of trash that aren't fit for recycling.  None of them will last as long or as good as she has."

"Okay, I'll tell that to someone who asked earlier."  She snuggled in.  "She really didn't like the van but Adanne told her 'how else do you carry eight kids' so she shut up."

Miss Perkins nodded.  "That was the earlier recess's topic of contention."

"My girls will firmly stick up for themselves and I have taught the girls how to defend themselves in case someone comes up to them," Xander told her.  "They know they're not to fight but if someone attacks them physically they know how to get away and go for help."

Dean nodded.  "Missy and Bobby do too.  We spent their early years doing a lot of traveling."

Missy nodded.  "A lot of traveling around the US."

The teacher smiled.  "That's good for you though.  It means you learn more about people and places.  It'll help you in geography classes."

"Most of the time we didn't know where we were," she admitted.  "We were too little and not driving."

Mrs. Perkins nodded.  "That's fine, Missy."  She smiled at the parents.  "As long as they don't call him that in front of his mother it should be fine.  We did talk to the mother about her child's name being uncomfortable for some other students at the start of the year so she knows some will have a problem.  I think that's the most workable solution we've come to yet."

"Sometimes common sense is better than higher sense," Xander said dryly.  "We saw one parent this morning who had no sense."

"Yes, we know her.  She has three children by her current trophy husband."

Xander shook his head.  "Thankfully I don't date women like her."

"Uncle Xander, we still want you to marry Daddy.  Even if we like B'letta, she agreed that you should marry Daddy so there's no inter-racial problems some year soon."

He gave her a dirty look.  "If your daddy was a girl I might hit on him.  Until then, it's probably not going to happen so you guys need to move to another track in your minds."

"Whatever but we're still cheering for it."

Dean poked her.  "You have manners."

"Sorry, Daddy."  She smiled and snuggled into his chest.  "We love you and we think it'd make you happier too."  She smiled at the teacher.  "Were we good today?"

"You were very good today, Missy.  Thank you for that."

"You're welcome.  We only turn into hellish children when we're cranky."  The teacher laughed.  "We can but we apologize later."

"Yes they do," Xander said dryly.  "From their corners usually."  Missy just grinned sweetly at him.  Dean poked her again.  "Does the horde have homework tonight?"

"I think the two older girls do.  I know the ones in my class don't.  They're ahead of where we are at the moment."

"We had them doing workbooks while we moved," Dean told her.

"They're doing very good academically.  They're all looking to be very smart children.  A bit strong willed but that's normal in some children."

"Our children make water buffalo look easy some days," Xander agreed dryly.  "They can out-stubborn many people."

"Especially when we're fighting over the last popsicle," Missy agreed.  "I won," she said happily.

"I'll pick up more on the way home," Xander said dryly.  The teacher laughed.  "Any other concerns?"

"No, they were very good today beyond that one small problem and those questions the other parents and teachers had.  We do have a weekly reading program that some parents come in on.  Would you like to come to that?"

"I don't read that well out loud," Xander told her.  She nodded, looking like she understood.  "I'll gladly let them bring in books for it.  Dean?"

"I can do that.  Sammy would probably love to.  He's a big book nerd too."

"Sammy?" she asked.

"My brother.  Bobby's dad."

"Oh, him.  That would be wonderful."  She dug out a calendar.  "This is the schedule we have set up for it.  We do ask that you bring something that's about their age range."

"I'm reading Pony Club books," Missy told her.

"Those are a bit above the age range of the average child here."

"We have some longer, simpler books.  I brought down a good portion of the stock from the old store," Xander assured her, getting a smile back.  "We'll have the kids help him pick out something to bring.  Like I said, I'd love to help with that but I really do read sucky out loud."

"It happens to the best of us, Mr. Harris."  She smiled and shook their hands.  "Thank you for giving us such wonderful students to nurture.  I'm sure we'll have a lot of fun with them."

"You're welcome," Missy said happily.  She slid to the floor and pushed her skirt down.  "You have a good afternoon too, Mrs. Perkins."

"Thank you, Missy."  She smiled as the little girl walked her uncle and father out.  "She's very polite when she wants to be."  She went to tell that one teacher about how the children had learned Swahili.  It could only help her own son.  He didn't like to read yet.

Dean looked at Xander once they were in the Impala.  "Yuppie scum," he said dryly.

"Very but yuppie scum schools get them a better chance of doing something beyond hunting if they want to.  Plus it can help them with the research stuff later if they do decide to hunt.  It'll also teach them how to deal with higher class people and work their way around them without arousing any suspicion."  They shared a look.  "Plus it's a really good school.  I'd hate for my girls to be stupid and me be a grandfather too soon."

"Me too."  He started the car, heading back toward the houses.  "Popsicle shopping?"

"Apparently we need to."  Dean snorted, shaking his head but giving him a fond look.  He looked back.  "Were you guys good today?"

"Mostly.  The one bully who tried us is really dumb.  He barely speaks his own language.  Much less any other one.  He's big and dumb.  He'll play football probably."  Xander nodded at that.  "The other kids were nice enough.  A few were kinda snotty but we ignored them back.  One was bouncy and hyper so we talked with him and let him play with us.  Even after the teacher gave him something that made him sleepy.  We read to the other kids when she asked us to read out loud to show how good we did.  She didn't like Amanda's pronunciation of some words but otherwise it went okay.  Amanda told her it was how she had learned to say it in Cleveland from the stuffy, British guy who ran the Council."

"It probably was.  I had to work on her spelling Brit too for a while."  He looked at Dean.  "Giles was a bad influence.  He had the girls calling fries chips and things.  He's the reason Amanda can read Latin."

"She can?"

"Yeah, all the girls now can.  Ancient Greek too thanks to him and Dawn."  Dean shook his head.  "Missy, have the kids been teaching you Swahili and other languages?"

"Yup, sure have," she said happily.  She said something in Swahili.

Dean glanced back.  "That had better not have been swearing, young lady."  He turned a corner.

"It was asking for cold, sweet things," Xander told him.  "They don't have a native word for popsicle."

Dean snorted.  "My girls are learning a lot from yours.  Including bad fingernail polish rules."

"Sorry.  I didn't do any last night.  Dawn did when she got home."

"She helped us do a lot of stuff last night," Missy said happily.  "Including how to lotion our feet.  She said she saw someone who had a really bad foot infection yesterday.  They were dia...diabetic?"  Xander nodded.  "And they had bad infections."

"That can happen but it's not something you need to worry about happening," Xander told her.  "Mine either."  She smiled at that.  "You can tell them that."  She nodded.  Dean pulled into the store so he ran in to get them both some popsicles for the kids.  They deserved a treat.  He came out and they went home.  "We're back," Xander called as he walked into his house.

Sam looked over from reading to the kids.  "Were they that bad on their first day?"

"Some yuppie bastard parent named their kid asshole.  Our kids were firm in not saying it since they knew better," Dean told him.  Sam smiled at his son for that.  "Adanne did good running off a bully on the schoolyard by swearing at him in Swahili."

"Some of the parents were worried that we'd be insulted because they thought the older three were biracial," Xander added.  "We got invited to read to the class.  Nothing as high as the girls are reading after hours but around their age sort of books."

"I'd gladly do that," Sam agreed with a smile.  "Anything else good?"

"I was invited to talk about our travels in Africa but I told her I wasn't sure I could tame them down any.  Parents who would freak out at talking to kids of another race because they didn't want to insult them accidentally did not want their kids to hear about hunting for food or civil wars.  I did tell her if we could find some stories that were tame enough I'd gladly tell them about it.  I offered you all the books you wanted for the reading program, Sam."

"That's cool."  He went back to reading to the kids out of the bigger kid book.  "Did we get more popsicles?"

"They're getting cold now," Xander told him.  "Missy told us she had won the stubborn contest to get the last one."

"She's got her daddy's pigheadedness," Sam agreed dryly, patting her on the head.  "Amanda, what did the bully want?"

"To pick on us for being littler.  Pity."

Xander looked at her.  "Really?"

"Well.....  Kinda?" she guessed.

Adanne nodded.  "He wanted to pick on Bri for being pretty and cute today.  So I told him what I thought of his ugly, expensive clothes and watch that he couldn't tell the time on anyway, and his manners.  He ran off after me telling him what I thought of him, Daddy."

"I'm glad you didn't get into a fight.  One of the teachers there does speak Swahili.  She adopted overseas too."  They nodded at that.  "She was the one giggling at what you called him."  He stared his daughter down.  "They have a no bullying rule, girls, and boys.  Tell the teachers instead of getting into a fight.  That way we don't have to pay hospital bills."  They all sighed but nodded.  "Unless you have to protect yourself from an actual attack snark back like Aunt Buffy taught you."

"Yes, Daddy."

"Yes,  Uncle Xander."

"Good.  Who has homework?"

"Me," Adanne said, grimacing.  "It's easy stuff.  I did it during lunch."

"Let me check it over before dinner."  She nodded, snuggling back into Bri's side for their story.  Sam and Dean crashed, letting Sam finish the story.  "Say thank you," Xander ordered.

"Thank you, Uncle Sam," the girls said, piling on to hug him.

"You're welcome."  They smiled and ran to do other things.

"Thanks, Sam," Xander said.

"Not a problem.  I like reading to the kids."  He heaved himself onto the couch.  "Amanda asked about foot infections so I told them it was very rare and not a problem they had to worry about."

"Dawn had a diabetic with foot problems yesterday," Dean told him.

"That makes more sense.  Someone actually named their kids asshole?"

"She claims it's French," Dean said grimly.  "The kids refused to say it so they wouldn't get in trouble.  We told Missy to call him Big A or something."

"That'll be better," Sam agreed.  "Plus a nickname to help later students too."

"We were warned his mom won't like it but yay," Xander added.  He yawned.  "Am I making everyone dinner tonight?"

"If you want," Dean agreed.  "Keeps us from doing it."

"Cool."  He went to see what they wanted, deciding and starting on it.

"Daddy, can we have that stuff you told us was stuff we thought we wouldn't eat?  We still like it anyway," Adanne called.

"I'll make it tomorrow night, Adanne.  It takes all day to marinate."

"Okay."  She went back to her shared room.

Xander shook his head but it was fine.  Eight kids.  He was insane.  Dean gave him a smirk.  "She was amazed that I could potty train in the desert."

"Maybe she should've let her kid bite her like you did the girls."

"Maybe," Xander agreed.  "Seemed to work for them."  He put stuff in the oven then came out to sit down.  "Anything good happen in the research center?"

"Beth said we couldn't pack up all the books in the center to bring back," Sam told him.

"If we had the money to rebuild the main building, I'd move the headquarters out here.  It'd be nice to be able to train them outside."  Dean nodded at that.  "But Beth would probably hate it.  It'd make her commute longer."  He shifted, getting comfortable.  He yawned a bit.  "It's been a long day.  They had to get up at five so Bri could fuss over her clothes.  Her alarm woke me."

"I'll wake you up in about twenty if you want," Dean offered.  Xander yawned, putting his feet up so he wouldn't have to move.

Paka sauntered out, looking at her father with an evil grin.  "No," Sam ordered.  "You guys woke him up really early this morning."  She sat down between them, giving them happy looks.  "You look like you're about to get into trouble.  Why?" Sam asked patiently.

"I'm being good."

"Who isn't?" Dean asked.

"The kitty in the tree.  Missy spotted it."

Dean groaned, going to talk his daughter out of wanting a pet.  They'd be back on the road some day.  They couldn't leave a pet behind because their kids would wail in misery if they tried to.  There were no cats allowed in the Impala.  Besides, Winchesters weren't really cat people.  Fortunately he found that Bri had adopted it and had talked it in out of the tree outside her shared room.  Dean went back to the couch, letting himself feel comfortable again too.  It had been a long day.

Sam gave both napping guys a smile, getting up to check on dinner when he started to smell it.  It looked done so he took it out quietly and got the kids cleaned up so he could warm up some vegetables for them.  They were kids, they needed vegetables.

***

Dean came down the next morning, finding a smugly napping cat on his hood.  He picked it up by the back of the neck, carrying it to Xander's house.  He held it up when Xander opened the door with a confused look.  "I think this pussy's yours?" he asked dryly, handing it over.

"Where was it?"

"The hood of my car."

"Any scratches I'll have to help you fix?"

"Not that I saw.  Thankfully.  Or I'd have made Missy mittens."  He walked off.  The kids had to go to school.

Xander looked at the cat.  "Don't mess with his car, cat.  He's overprotective of it."  He petted it, letting Bri have it since she was finished with breakfast and ready to go.  "Ten minutes," he announced.

"Daddy, I just started to eat," Paka complained.

He shrugged.  "You can finish in that time."

"I have to finish getting ready!" she complained, shoveling food in her mouth.

"Then next time, get up on time, Paka."

"I had to shower."

"Take one at night."  He sighed, sitting down to wait on the kids.  They could leave a few minutes later.  He looked at the boys.  "When it's your turn to do the mad dash to school in the morning I'm sure you'll be getting organizing help from the older girls.  By then they'll hopefully have it down."

"Organizing?" Amanda asked, looking confused.  "What can be organized for school, Daddy?  We weren't before."

"You can shower the night before.  You can make sure all your books are where you need them, you can pick out your clothes.  That'd leave getting up and eating, then actually getting dressed as the only things that had to be done."

Bri grimaced.  "I sweat all night, Daddy.  I need my morning baths."

"Then you can do that but all of you taking them at the same time is insane.  Today, decide who gets the night showers and who gets the morning showers.  Baths are for days off and weekends."  They nodded at that wisdom.  Even Bri could do her hair in the shower on weekdays so they wouldn't take so long.  "We'll decide where books go once you've done your homework so it's all waiting on you.  Then I'll start to make lunches the night before too."  He got up to do that, realizing they had no sandwich stuff.  He sighed and pulled out a twenty, handing it to Adanne.  "For you and your sisters for lunch."  She beamed.  "Eat healthy like I would want."  She nodded.  "Good girl."  He sat down again.  "I'll grocery shop for lunch stuff tonight."  They all nodded and finished up, those that still needed it going to get dressed and find their things.  Xander got them to school, barely.  He waved at the monitoring teacher.  "Morning insanity."

"With that many, I'm sure it is," she agreed.  She followed the last few kids into the school, closing the doors behind her.

Xander drove to the Council, heading up to his office.  Sam and Dean were already there.  "I need to pick up lunch stuff for the girls."  He flopped down.  "We've got to get organized."

"Sammy did that already for us," Dean admitted.  "He even nags like a mother."

Sam stuck his tongue out.  "At least Missy's getting some softer influences.  Or else she'd be a biker chick already, Dean."

"Not my baby girl."

"She does like motorcycles," Xander reminded him.  "What's up today?"

"The girl in Orlando's having issues," Beth said as she walked in.  "Mostly spoiled girl issues.  The one in Texas is bored out of her skull and wants to trade out.  She said it's not 'sneaking across the border' season so she doesn't have anything to do right now."

"What's up with Orlando?" Xander asked.  "Spoiled  how?"

Beth gave him a dirty look.  "Boyfriend broke up with her, she got reprimanded on the job for pouting, hunting's getting annoying but she was taking out her frustration on the vamps.  If she had vacation time I'd suggest the girls switch."

"The one in Texas lives at home," Xander admitted.  "Where is she working now?  I thought she worked at Universal Studios in a restaurant."

"Telemarketing."

Xander rolled his eyes.  "Couldn't she find a better job?"

"Apparently not."

He sighed.  "I'll call and talk to her."

"Thank you.  I wanted to spank her."

"I might do that too," Xander admitted dryly.  "I need time to go grocery shopping before picking up the kids at their after school thing.  The boys are in the library."

"I saw."  She put down the daily memo flood.  "From: Japan, England, Rome, Egypt, and Thailand."

Xander found that one first, smiling at it.  "Carma's doing good.  She said she got three slavers last week."

"Mr. Giles wasn't sure why she was bothering until she had the witch they work with send the corpse of one of the demons to him.  Then he said it was all right," Beth said dryly.  "Told her to be careful of the human ones."

"I'm sure she'll do what she can to put them out of business too," he said dryly.  "That's why she went to Thailand.  She'd be able to handle the puss sucking assholes of the universe."  She nodded she understood that.  He looked over the others.  Egypt's watcher in charge wanted him back.  He smiled at that.  He went through the others.  "So, Japan's about situation normal.  England and Rome too.  Egypt has some whiny people who don't understand but the government people do. Thailand's doing good at her appointed task.  Any bad news today?"

"Only that.  Egypt did send a supplemental report."  She handed it over.  "I didn't know you had dealt with some tomb living demons."

Xander nodded.  "I ran into a few of those in some native shrines."  He frowned as he read it over.  "That doesn't look good and those aren't easy.  Who's over there?"

"I don't know," she admitted.  "Mr. Giles told him to let him know how it went.  He had heard those demons weren't particularly easy to kill."

Xander looked at her.  "One of them is the reason I know Jon out of Morocco.  I needed artillery."

"You're not a slayer," she pointed out gently.

"Plain old guns didn't work," he said blandly.  She shuddered.  "I'll call.  Tell him about the one I did, see if this one's as big and nasty.  Any other bad news?"  She shook her head.  He looked at Sam.  "Any upcoming things you've seen?"

"The major prophecy books are saying India's going to have one soon, I sent that to the Japanese office so they could look it over.  Is Thailand closer?"

"Yes, but she's just handling that area since it's so overcrowded with demons.  Including some that do beneficial things around shrines."  He picked up the phone, calling Egypt first.  "Upton, my man."  He listened to him complain about some of the locals.  "We know.  That's why I decided to put your building there.  The locals do know.  They've had two slayers come from that particular city.  Since they know they're worried you'll bring something.  I ignored them.  You can do the same or have a talk with the head matron to look over your girls."  He smiled, leaning back.  "That's why I'm calling.  Want my contact in Morocco?"  He listened.

"Guns didn't work against it, Upton.  I did try that.  Um, no.  I worked with the cultural ministry since they caught me trying to deal with it the first time.  They're the ones who put me in touch with the guy.  Yes, him."  He nodded that the guy had complained about this new one and the damage the last one had caused.  "Okay, so what's your plan?  They have impervious-to-sharp-pointy-thing skin, Upton.  It takes a lot of pressure to pierce them.  I'm thinking short range, but high yield.  No, guns didn't work.  I tried.  You know I had real weapons with me by then.  Exactly.  No, not a single one went through anywhere but the toe and it nearly got me pounded into a wall.  That doesn't have enough force.

"Think of it like needing the same force to push an elephant through a Nile reed, Upton.  If fifty caliber rounds didn't work, crossbows certainly won't.  Yes I did."  He rubbed his head.  "I filed mine with Faith.  She was the one who called to check on me.  You might talk with Cera since she was Faith's second but she's probably been up all night since it's vamp party time in England with schools restarting.  That's where she is, yes.  Until then, maybe a trap?  I'm not sure if poisons work on it or not.  You might be able to trap it but it's pretty strong so you'd have to use metal cages.  No idea.  Ask the ministry guy, Upton.  He'd be able to get you access when you needed it with where they like to nest.  You might also ask your witch if they're susceptible or easily knocked out that way.  Also if there's any magical artifacts.

"If I remember right the one I dealt with liked to rest on them."  He knew the guy was rolling his eyes.  "It let him find a whole new cache of artifacts, Upton.  Seriously.  Half of which Giles had to ask someone from Devon to clean."  He smirked at the boys.  "Good.  Let me know, get my report from Cera if you think it'll help.  I tried a few things.  Easier days, my man."  He hung up.  "We might need a new girl soon," he muttered, calling Giles.  "It's Xander.  Upton's problem demon isn't going to be easy to kill, Giles.  I had to go to that guy in Morocco to get something because even fifty caliber shells didn't dent it other than on the foot.  Exactly.  I filed it with Faith and I told him that.

"Yeah, I called and told him why we had put the building there.  Namely two girls had come from the city, they all knew and were slightly worried but they'd deal with it.  I did suggest a witch and some trapping.  Maybe a poisoning, I'm not sure if it'd work or not on those.  So be ready to get him some backup.  Please?"  He hung up, rubbing his forehead again.  "That's going to be fun.  Not."

"Any other problem areas?" Dean asked.

"I've been looking over the local ghost and problem populations," Sam said.  "We do have a small demon community in town."

"As long as they're peaceful we're fine with it," Xander assured him.  They both nodded.  "I do know that the small place in the keys is like a ritual dying place recently.  I don't know why.  I know that a few of the higher demons have been in town over the last few years.  One was trying to get Carma from me.  He had an officer possessed.  We know that there's some ghosts.  I don't know how many beyond the ones Beth gave you guys."

"We're looking into those," Dean promised.  "Any new deaths that might've caused problems, Sammy?"

"One and I'm not sure it won't be returning to get vengeance."

"Can we handle it without a slayer?" Xander asked.

"We usually do," Dean said with a smirk.  "Not that hard."

"Good."  He handed over something.  "The station has a spirit hanging around that's not dangerous or damaging, but he's scared a few perps.  They want him to move on without causing a problem."

"Peaceful but annoying?" Dean asked.  Xander nodded.  "Any idea who?"

"A former officer out of patrol.  He's been helping but it's creeping out some of the guys.  They wanted to know if we could talk to the ghost, see if it'd be less obvious.  They don't care if it stays, but they want him to be less creepy."

"I'll see if we can do that tonight," Sam offered.  "Can you babysit?"

"Of course.  Like I have so much to do outside of getting them ready for the next day of school."

"When are the three mini-terrors to chocolate going to start training again?" Dean asked.

Xander shrugged.  "Probably this weekend."

"I'll help if we're local."  That got a nod.  "So we've got a few to research, Sammy's got his weekly check of the major and minor prophecy books.  Cleveland?"

"Starting to stand again.  They've found a new building to renovate."

"Decent," Dean said, standing up.  "Have fun talking the girl in Orlando out of her sulk."

"Oh, she's going to be spanked," Xander said dryly.  "She let three very harmful demons go the other night by the reports I got from their PD."  He held them up.  Dean groaned, shaking his head.  "So there might be spanking."  He grinned.  They left him alone to call Carma in Thailand to check on her then Orlando.  That one did need her head pulled out of her ass.  If he couldn't do it, he'd suggest Cera take a vacation to Disney, mostly to watch her freak out at the happy patrol but she'd come straighten the girl out.

***

Dean walked the cat over the next morning too.  "Back on the hood.  I had it inside the garage with all the doors and windows closed."

"Cats are mystical that way," he said, glaring at the cat.  It only gave him a smug look.  "No being on his car, kitty cat.  Or you're going to the pound."  He put it down.  "I'll try to keep it inside tonight, Dean.  The girls are amazed that cats will sit on your lap and let you spoil them."

Dean snorted, walking off shaking his head.  "Winchesters don't do fuzzy kitties, Xander."

"Want Bri?" he called after him.

"No thanks.  She'll give Missy more fashion advice."  He went to put warding symbols around the garage and building.  That way the cat couldn't get in.  Then he added a nice salt ring around the garage to keep other spirits out.  Hopefully that would help.  Maybe?  He didn't want his paint job scratched.

Sam came out to look, adding a few more symbols.  Dean gave him an odd look.  "To Bast," he explained.  "She was over cats."  He walked back inside.

Dean sighed, looking up. "Why do I have a nerd for a brother?" he muttered.

"I don't want a haircut!" Bobby yelled.

Dean walked into their house, staring at his nephew.  "It's not too long but if it gets much longer you'll look like one of those guys on the cover of girl books."

"They seem to be liked," he pouted.

"Son," Sam said patiently.  "I'm not going to shave you or anything.  I'm going to trim around your ears and tidy up the back a little bit."

"No!"  He ran off, going to hide in his closet.

"Your girlfriend will like it," Missy called after him.

"She's not my girlfriend!  Girls are all evil and icky, like you!" he shouted back, then slammed his door.

"Thank you," she called after him.  "Because boys are gross and need to be kept like kitty cats."

"Girlfriend?" Dean asked dryly.

"Paka likes him," she said with a grin.  "But she's denying it."

"Uh-huh.  That's usual kid stuff," Dean assured her.

"Remember, daddies are boys," Sam said patiently.

She shrugged.  "Then maybe having kids means that you got enough kitty cat training."  She walked off before her dad could swat her.

Dean and Sam shared a look.  Dean took the scissors to Bobby's room.  Sam went to correct his niece about boys again.  He walked in and opened the closet door, finding the boy hiding inside a bunched up blanket.  "Good hiding job, Bobby."  The boy moaned.  He pulled him out.  "Everyone needs a trim.  I'll do it so Sammy won't make you too bald."

"Can't we go see a barber?" he begged.  "You guys make it uneven and the other kids will laugh.  They think we're poor and charity cases, Uncle Dean."

"They're wrong.  Ignore them."

"But it's a lot of the kids."

"Ignore them anyway," Dean told him. "You have friends, it shouldn't matter what the other kids think."

"Fine, but they don't want to talk to us anymore.  I hate school."  He pouted, crossing his arms over his chest.

Dean stared at him.  "We can switch you two out of there to somewhere less preppie."

"If you do we won't see the girls as much.  Then we won't have any friends," he said, giving him a pitiful look.

"So choose.  The school with the snobs who think shopping is a gift from God, even if you know better, or somewhere with less of them."

Sam walked in.  "Miami's full of people like that, Dean.  Even Beth was wearing designer clothes."  He sat down in front of his son.  "We can go to the barber shop if you want."

"You too?  You need a trim too, Dad."

"We three guys can go.  Missy doesn't need more than new hair things."

"Please?  And maybe some new t-shirts that aren't too big?"

"That we'll see about," Dean ordered.  Bobby nodded at that.  "We get paid this weekend. We'll go Saturday?"  His nephew gave him a hug.  "You can talk to us about this stuff."

"Missy's liked because she's fashionable.  Bri too.  The other girls basically sneer back at the snobs."

"Does Xander know that his kids are having problems?"

"Don't know," Bobby admitted quietly.

"I'll let him know so he can talk to them about it."  Bobby nodded, giving him another hug.  "We'll get a copy of the dress code for the school tomorrow.  For now, ignore the snobs.  They're stupid, shallow, and won't do anything important with their lives unless their daddies buy them a real job," Dean told him.  "Okay?"  He nodded.  "Good.  Now, homework?"

"Done."

"Good."  He patted him on the head, handing Sam the scissors.  "Let me tell Xander."  He walked out, heading over there.  He stopped the cat trying to sneak in to visit his daughter on the way.  Some holy water from the kitchen helped with that.  It ran off again.  He nodded Xander outside when he answered the door.  "The snobs are starting on the kids about their clothes."

"When the teacher and I had a talk, I made sure she knew I wasn't going to hang with the snobs who hunt for trophies, but I could hunt.  That I did have money but my girls also knew how to camp, and that all my kids are tougher than average.  They have to be.  Now, there's a way to help them if you'll agree.  Did you know the school had a self-defense club?"

"I didn't."

"Which does take kids in kindergarten.  It teaches three different forms of martial arts.  I'm thinking of letting the girls go in and show their asses and have the instructor help train them."

"That's not a bad idea.  Bobby would like that.  Missy might."

"And it would make sure the other kids knew that picking on ours was a bad idea.  The teacher knows I'm a practical person, not an idealist and not a snob with money.  I have money and my kids are practical people."

"Bobby said some got onto him about big clothes since he's growing."

Xander nodded.  "There's always someone like Cordelia in each school.  This time they're all in fourth grade.  Adanne ran into one.  She asked her why she wasn't wearing a grass skirt.  Adanne calmly told her that her native people wore much prettier clothes that were better in the heat, had prettier colors, and were more comfortable than anything the girl thought was fashionable.  Because fashion only got you dumbed down so you couldn't read."

"So they'll be seen as geeks?"

"Probably.  Geeks have more room in the clothing sneering rules but it happens."

"True.  All schools have kids like that.  One got onto Missy at the old one."

"Yup, and Paka.  Who nearly sneered herself into suspension.  Especially since she pointed out she was smarter and read better than the other girl, who was two years older than she was.  I agreed when the principal told me but reminded her not to pick on kids over a weakness like a learning disability."  He smirked.  "Her mother hit the roof.  Claimed her daughter was just as smart.  So Paka kindly told her what she had read the night before, which the mother spluttered about because it was something she couldn't read.  The principal reminded the mother that they were there for knowledge, not fashion, and her daughter's attitude had become atrocious recently.  Paka got detention."

"Is there anywhere they're not?"

"Some hippie schools.  There's a few good ones spread around here and there."

"No thanks.  I don't want Missy to embrace free love techniques until she's married."

"Me either."  He smirked.  "It'll happen.  We'll handle it as it does.  Let's start with showing that our girls do have sense, practical and otherwise, and that those other girls are useless wastes of trophy sperm."

"Sure, we'll talk with the self-defense guy tomorrow?"

"Sure."  They went to talk to their own kids.  Xander looked at the slayers.  "We're going to cause some preemptive gossip stopping."  They all stared at him.  "Tomorrow, we are enrolling all of you in the self-defense club."  The older girls smirked.  "No going full out, slayer mode on the other kids," he warned.

"Yes, Daddy," Halla said quietly.  "Why?"

"The same sort of snobs that worry about you girls not being dumb future trophy wives."

"They're stupid," Paka agreed.  "I haven't had any problems yet."

"I have," Halla admitted.  "One remarked on my hair.  I told her it was because of a lion attack."

Xander smirked.  "You had white hair when you came out according to your mom."  He ruffled it.  "It could use styled some."

"I know I need a trim."

"We'll go this weekend.  It's payday."  They smirked and nodded.  "Good.  Homework?"  They went back to it.  He settled in to help the younger three learn to read better.  They would be just as smart as his older ones.

***

Xander nodded at the defense instructor.  "My girls have had some training from me.  Mine's from combat.  The oldest three know to pull their punches," he warned.

"That's reasonable.  I heard you've been in some dangerous places over the years, Mr. Harris.  Also that you were making sure your girls could handle anything that came after you or them."

"They are."  He waved them forward.  "These are Bobby and Missy Winchester.  Their fathers work with me.  They're cousins."  He nodded at that.  "Missy and Bobby have some beginning, get away from the bad guy, training."

"Reasonable at their ages.  How far up do you intend them to go?"

"All the way that they want.  The older three need the training more in case they join my business.  The others have that choice, they'll probably be there."

"I can handle that."  He led them out to the mat to test them.  "I want you older girls to show me how you'd get away from someone trying to grab you."  He waved one of the oldest kids out.  "The older three have had some training.  The younger are more avoidance."  He nodded, moving to attack Adanne.  She ducked the grab and spun, kicking his leg to make him move back.  He groaned and reached for her again.  This time she got him down and stood in a 'ready' stance.  "Hold."  Adanne stepped back.  He smiled.  "Okay, I want you three oldest ones to attack me as a group.  Like I'm a bad guy who broke in."

Adanne lead, Halla and Paka right behind her.  Adanne tackled, which he tried to avoid but it still tangled his feet.  The other two  made sure he went down and sat on him.  He smiled.  "Good job," Xander called.  "Spar with each other for a few, girls.  Bri, Amanda."  They nodded and the teacher got up, attacking him in what they knew.

The teacher stopped Amanda.  "You're over extending.  That means you fall over."  He showed her how to do it, getting a grin.  Missy attacked next and it was good.  Straight out street brawling but decent for her age.  Bobby was backing her up by blocking him from moving away.  Paka *accidentally* ran into him so he tripped again.  That gave Missy the chance to stand on him.  "We can work on those skills," he told her.

She smirked.  "That's fine.  Will we need special clothes?  That way Daddy can buy us some when he takes us shopping this weekend."

"Maybe something to work out in.  I don't demand formal gi's.  Can you get off me?"  She hopped off him.  He watched the other three.  They were seriously trying to hurt each other.  He looked at Xander, who waved it off.  "Fighting over lack of chores?"

"Who gets the first shower once we get home," Xander admitted.  "We need another two bathrooms but I don't want to put up with renovations at the moment."  That got a nod.   "Good, girls.  Hold."  They backed off.  "Who won?"

"I scored on Halla the most," Paka said proudly.  "But Adanne knocked us both down."

"Then we'll work on Halla's blocking abilities and you two can wrestle later for the first shower," Xander told them.  They smirked and nodded.  He looked at the teacher.  "If I'm called back to active field duty for the people I work for, I need them able to protect themselves.  Things like to come for the older three."

"Agreed.  How are they on survival skills?  We have a hunting team in case you didn't know."

"They can all camp.  I got the younger three while I was on duty in Africa.  I trekked across the continent with all three of them."  That got a nod and a smile.  "The others can camp.  Missy and Bobby too."

"Good.  We can work on their skills.  They're sweet seeming girls."

"They're evil," Xander assured him with a smirk.  "Missy and Bri especially."  He walked off.  "I'll be back in an hour.  Let me grocery shop, girls."  They all waved and got back to it.  Dean and Sam were watching.

The teacher got the rest of the students out there to work with them in their groups.  The oldest three got put into the top group so they could move onto new skills and work on older ones.  The others got put into the mid group.  They had most of the first group's skills already.  Plus most of the snobs in the first group would be more likely to rely on pepper spray than not.  These kids needed to be able to defend themselves if necessary.  It was a good first practice and the girls all minded him very well.  They were polite.  They were using hand signals like most siblings did.  Missy and Bobby knew most of the other girls' signals.  They knew most of the cousins' signals.  It was going to be fun to teach them.

***

Dean smirked at a parent coming over to him the next morning.  "Morning."  He looked Missy over, helping her with her hair.  Her hairband had snapped in the car when she had played with it.  "Her hair came down."

"That happens to little girls now and then," she agreed with a smile.  "What grade are yours in?"

"Kindergarten.  Her and her cousin Bobby.  My brother's son."  He smiled at the boy waiting impatiently.  "You can go play."  He ran inside.  He finished brushing it.  "No other bands?"

"No, Daddy."

"You can have it down today.  Try not to play with it too much."  He put it into a loose braid when she pouted.  "See if Bri has a spare one."  She ran inside.  He grinned at the parent again.  "Minor traumas but at her age they're all important."

"We noticed that your children aren't like most of the others that go here."

"No, mine have common sense.  Many of them don't."

She snickered.  "Some don't," she agreed.  "What do you and your brother do?  I notice you didn't go for a flashy car like most of the other parents."

Dean stroked his hood.  "She's been in the family since my dad got her as a teenager.  She's served the family well and she's a member of it.  I'd never get rid of her."

"She's beautifully maintained," she assured him.  "I've heard you work with that one with all the children?"

"Sammy and I both work with Harris at the Watchers Council."  She went pale.  He smirked.  "He's the regional head," he said quietly.

"Oh, I see.  Like Preston was before?"

"Only with less death since the guy killed a bunch of people."

"Oh, dear.  I hadn't heard that."  Dean nodded.  "So he's taken over from England?  He didn't seem British."

"He's from California.  One of the ones in the field out there."

"Interesting.  I know you're all very young."

"Yes, but we've got field experience."

"That's reasonable."  She moved closer.  "Preston said something about a house in the Grove that was a problem.  Have you taken a look at it yet?"

"Not yet.  No one's told us anything about it.  If they do we'll gladly look to see what sort of problem is it," he assured her.  She smiled and nodded, writing down an address.  "Thank you."

"You're welcome.  Your daughter is adorably fashionable."

"I'd rather she have sense.  Fashion makes her look less realistic.  I couldn't stand having Barbie as a daughter."

She giggled.  "Some are but not here.  Those sort have special schools they recruit from.  Only a few of ours were eligible but their parents wanted them to actually learn something.  I'll tell a few of the other parents who knew Preston that Mr. Harris took over for him.  His girls seem sweet."

"They are until they start making evil plans with mine," he admitted dryly.  "Let us know if there's more problems we should hear about as well."

"I shall."  She shook his hand and walked off to gossip with those who should hear.  She had more tact so they had sent her.  "That is one of the people who works with the same group Preston used to.  Harris, the one with all the children, took over his spot.  That one and his little brother also work there."  They gave him appreciative looks.  That did explain why their children were practical instead of finding a niche quickly.  "I gave him the address of Adalaide's old house.  In case they wanted to look it over."  They smiled at that tidbit.

***

Dean strolled into the Watcher library.  "House with something going on."  He handed over the address.  "Beth was right.  They sent an emissary to question me.  She knew Preston, the old head."

"Eww."

"I told her we did the same thing but with less death."  He smirked.  "She said the kids were good."

"Good.  Hopefully some of them stop their kids."

"Some of them belong at the rich snob school of future rich skanky hos she said.  Their parents wanted them to learn something."

Sam looked at him.  "Not all heiresses are like that.  We had a few decent ones at Stanford, Dean.  They actually studied and wanted to do things with their lives."

"Most of these only want to get laid and party, Sammy."

"Good point.  Miami does have the same people that LA and New York does."

"Which is another good reason the girls aren't going to New York," Xander said as he walked past the doorway.  "Small glitch with one of your ghosts, guys.  It's drug dealers."

"We'll look into that," Sam called after him.  He and Dean shared a look before he gave Dean what he already had on the local problem areas.  That way they could start handling issues.  They saw a youngish looking girl go running past the doorway crying.  "Slayer?"

"Probably," Dean agreed.  He went to check.  Xander was giving her a hug.  "Problems?"

"Guy issues."

"It happens to all girls sometimes," he pointed out.  "Which ghost is drug dealers?"

"The one by the civic center."

"I'll look into that one first then so we can turn it in."  He closed the door, running into Beth on his way back to the library.  "Sobbing slayer of misery."

She sighed.  "That girl needs to straighten out," she muttered.

"Maybe she's got a reason this time," he offered.

"Excuse me, you're what?" Xander shouted.

"That's probably a good reason to cry," Dean decided, going to hide from the emo slayer.  He didn't want to know what she was, because he might start to think about his daughter coming home with similar news some year.

***

Xander came back to the office, flopping down between the brothers at the table.  "Why do I have to fly coach?" he mimicked.  "Faith wouldn't have to."

"Spoiled or is she pregnant?" Dean asked, going back to his reading.

"Her boyfriend dumped her, she came up positive for an STD but isn't sure who she got it from, oh, and she's complaining that we don't pay her rent for her.  I reminded her there was a housing allowance.  She hadn't filed for it because she was supposed to live with her mother.  Apparently her mother had a boyfriend."

"Had?" Sam asked, giving him a look.

"Step-daddy-wannabe decided he liked them young and redhead while drunk.  She moved out to a place she shared with two other girls and had a decent job.  Unfortunately she was saying the normal things were hard to deal with.  That she was always too tired to patrol.  She works telemarketing.  Yeah, it's soul sucking.  Been there for a few weeks at one point in time.  I still managed to patrol and I had Anya then.  So she's going to get the shit smacked out of her by Cera for a few weeks.  The girl in Texas will be in to cover for her.   I put her and Chris' mom on together so they could make some plans.  The moms decided to talk a bit too.  Talia is not a happy camper at what her sister slayer pulled.  She's vowed to call her roommates too to make sure her stuff doesn't disappear to more than a storage area.  So we'll see."

"How much does the council pay for housing allotments?" Dean asked.  "Enough to get one on her own?"

"Probably not somewhere as expensive as Miami or Orlando are but somewhere not in a slum.  Somewhere with probably one roommate, who might be another slayer or the watcher for the area.  That'd be up to them to find.  We give them a food allowance too so they don't have to get full time jobs.  Quite a few of the girls do have less than demanding real jobs.  All but a few of the spoiled ones.  Chris, Maize, and Mary Elizabeth."

"Maize?" Dean snorted.

"Her mom's very hippie.  I gathered her for training.  Her mother was trying to get her to see how the non-violent approach would work for slaying.  She was complaining so I took her and her mom on a light patrol.  Even her mom staked the vampire then sighed and said a prayer over their ashes.  She looked at her daughter and told her she'd do what she had to but she was not allowed to live the life of total violence.  Defense is one thing, fun is another.  Her daughter nodded and promptly had to get some birth control issues straightened out once she got to Cleveland after she miscarried."  Sam shuddered.  "So she's a bit spoiled.  She's with Buffy in Rome.  Her mother wants her to picket the church now and then on some rights they think are wrong."

"Interesting," Sam decided.

"Her mom's really nice.  She sends her daughter extra cookies for the girls in the house, she sends a lot of pictures and things from home.  The girls love her mom but they could do without Maize now and then.  Buffy threatened to put her in a convent where they had a vow of silence if she didn't quit being such a slut."

Dean snickered.  "Dad thought about that with us once."

"You," Sam corrected.  "I'm more discriminating, Dean."

"Uh-huh."

Xander grinned.  "I like how you two handle things when I get upset."  He stood up, heading back up to his office.  "Hey, Beth.  She's on her way to Cera.  Talia's coming from Texas.  Any new news?"

"Not yet."  She looked at him.  "Xander, you are aware that Miami is a very...fashionable and slightly uptight city?" she asked finally.

He stared at her.  "Why would it matter?"

"Your kids aren't really going to fit in all that well down here.  Practical is very... Midwestern, not Miami.  Hardly any of us do practical things."

"I've seen that.  That's why there's such a high drug rate," he said dryly.  "We could've went to Houston."  She gave him a horrified look.  "Exactly.  That's why I'm here.  Houston's absolutely boring.  Beyond that, I do have two very fashion conscious girls.  They even pick out my clothes for me."

"Yes but you're not really up to Miami standards," she said, looking over his current loose t-shirt and jeans.  "Preston was in higher society."  Xander shuddered.  "A lot of the old Council was."

"I figured as much since Giles had an estate with horses to ride around on.  Still not my thing.  None of the current ones are."

"It does make us beneficial contacts.  That way they donate things to us instead of making us ask them for their possessed and magical items."

"It'll be fine, Beth.  No one's said anything beyond sniping at the kids for being younger and having brains.  Miami may be the east coast society ho city but not everyone is that way.  That's about two percent of the population.  We can ignore each other."

"Yes, but the job does bring some attention now and then."

He shook his head.  "Not unless there's an invasion."

"Preston told many people what we do."

"That was his screw up," he said firmly.  "Not mine.  My kids are in a socially acceptable school so they learn things like how to get around the rich folks if they have to hunt near them.  Everyone there knows that we're practical people because we do things like read."

"It's not really a Miami standard trait either," she agreed.  "I'm more worried that the kids will get picked on and so will you when you go out."

"Why would I go out?  I'm not going to society events, Beth.  I refuse and not even Giles can make me."

She gave him a horrified look.  "But you have to."

"No, I don't.  If Preston did, that was his problem.  Not mine.  I don't do social sniping and snubbing.  I could care less about high society things unless something comes for them.  Dean, Sam, and I are all agreed we're not society sorts.  We're hunters."

"There are hunters in society."

"Who do it for the trophies.  If I'm hunting animals, I do it for food.  The same as my older girls know how to skin and clean food."  She shuddered.  "No one's said anything except for a few snobby kids at the school and we've handled that.  Relax, Beth.  I'm not the social butterfly he was."  He went to his office, sending Giles' secretary an email so she could pass that information on.  In case it became a problem that Preston had been hob-knobbing with the elite.  He went back to his paperwork.  It was a never-ending task to go over some issues it seemed like.

"Travers would've wanted all his upper people to be well-educated and socially capable," she said, following him into the office a minute later with some coffee.

"Good thing he died, huh?" he asked blandly, looking up at her.  He got back a reply and smiled, showing it to her.  "I told Giles that Preston had been in society.  He's appalled.  The Council is supposed to be working in the shadows.  I don't think those two go together too well."

"It's beneficial and the way Miami operates.  Not everywhere operates like Sunnydale, Xander."

Xander shrugged.  "We had our share of snobs.  Cordelia's family comes to mind."  She snorted.  "Bottom line, Beth.  No society events for me, Dean, or Sam.  Or the kids.  No galas, no premieres, no events.  We're not here to play nice.  We're here to stop problems and make sure the girls in our region are handling their duties all right plus make things easier on them.  If we go to the museum, it'll be with the kids.  Probably as school trip chaperones.  We're not going to dress up unless it's absolutely necessary to save everyone in the city.  Possibly the whole world.  I'm not the girls.  I don't shop for a hobby."

"If you don't then you won't really fit into Miami."

"Miami's fitting just fine so far," he assured her.  "Without the social obligations.  So if anyone asks you, tell them I don't do society events somehow.  You can be as polite as you want.  I tend to be blunt."

"You'll never find them a good stepmother that way."

"We had a good stepmother candidate but the girls ran her off."  He stared her down.  "Nor do I want some society trained woman to be my children's stepmother, Beth.  That sort would drive me nuts.  Then I'd repay it by taking her camping and things."

"There are people who hunt."

"They'd be horrified that vampires used to be people," he said bluntly.  "They hunt for heads on the wall.  Not for defense, not for food, and not for any good reason that I could support.  I also wouldn't put up with brainless bimbos near my girls.  They might teach them bad habits."  He stared up at her.  "Really.  We're doing fine.  Thank you for the concern."

"Travers' rules...." she started firmly.

"Travers died in the explosion, Beth."

"You can't be sure of that!" she said.

"I can be.  You can ask Giles.  He had to identify people after the explosion."  She went pale.  "We don't go on Travers' rules because Travers was a dick.  He tried to have me killed for helping the slayers.  He tried to have the slayers killed and treated as disposable weapons.  They're not.  Travers was a power-hungry dick who did things the wrong way.  Giles is now in charge.  Not only does he have sense, he has the ability to look at the slayers as individual and necessary.  We don't go by Travers' rules because he screwed what the Council was so it was his personal playground and path to power.

"The Council is supposed to be shadowy and dealing with things that people don't want to acknowledge.  We can't do that while we're at a party.  So please, if any invites come in, you can be as polite as you want when you turn them down.  Giles doesn't go into society and he's the head of the Council.  I sure as hell don't.  Even if I was trained to do that, I'd end up sniping at some of the shallow people whose only worries are how much plastic surgery they're going to need to look less than thirty next year.  I may have money but I don't feel the need to join society because of that fact.  Am I clear?"  She stomped off.  He sighed, leaning back and taking some tylenol.  He saw someone come off the elevator and waved his kids his way.  "Have a good nap?"

"Yup," Everett said happily.  "Are you okay?  You look upset."

"Yeah, just had to bust some fantasy bubbles."  He gave them all hugs.  "What did we plan to do this afternoon?"

"Reading," Caleb said.

"Good.  I like that answer."  He gave them all kisses on the head.  "I have lunch somewhere around here."

"Uncle Sam fed us since you were at the airport," Sauda said, climbing into his lap.  "Where are they now?"

"The research center.  You can't go bother them for more than a break, guys.  Okay?"  They nodded, trooping that way.

"Xander, should I cancel your personalized stationary order?" Beth called.

"Why would I need any?"

"For personal letters."

"That's why you sign your name, Beth."

"That's not acceptable down here.  You have to learn to get along in Miami, Xander, not Cleveland and not Africa."  He stared until she looked away.  "It's necessary for every executive."

Xander asked Giles that question, getting back a shrug.  He asked the secretary up there about Beth's former job details.  What he got back was amusing.  "Giles said it's fine if it comes but I don't expect to need too much of it so don't order too much," he called.  He got up to chase down the kids so Sam and Dean could get back to work.  He found Sam reading to them in Latin.  "You've got better pronunciation than I do," he told him, sitting down and pulling Everett into his lap.

The boy smiled at him.  "No more paperwork?"

"Nope.  A bit of stress but no more paperwork for a while."  He gave him a squeeze.  The boys both clapped and Sauda cheered when Sam finished his story in Latin.  "That sounds better in Latin," Xander told him.

"It does.  Less dumb too," Dean said.  He looked at the kids.  "Now what?"

"Now, we go back to the office while Daddy gets over the shudders from the idea of him in polite society Beth had," Xander said quietly.  Dean and Sam both shuddered.  "How I feel too, guys."  He got up.  "C'mon, grab three books each."  They did that and followed him up to the office.

"When will you be finding them a daycare or nanny?" Beth asked when they walked in front of her desk.

"We're not.  Maybe a daycare for some longer hunts but Dawn'll watch them for me on her off hours."  He looked at her.  "I had them with me at the store too, Beth.  I don't need some surrogate Xander to take care of my kids.  The Winchesters and I share babysitting duties when necessary."

She grimaced.  "It can't be good for them."

"It's very good for them.  That's why they'll test out of kindergarten and right into first grade," Xander said proudly.  He closed his office door, sitting down with the kids to read to them for the next few hours.  Then it'd be mid-afternoon nap time.

Beth grimaced at the door, sending her superiors a message.  This couldn't be good for the Council.  Her superiors said he was right so she complained.

Xander came to the door a few minutes later.  "If you're that unhappy that I'm not a society sort, you can transfer up to New York or one of the other regional offices, Beth," he said quietly.  She glared at him.  He stared back.  "We're hunters, not socialites.  I can't hunt demons while being gooed over by some brainless bimbo with fake breasts and teeth.  That's not the man I am even if I could pull it off.  I can't, I won't, and the offer stands to get you to Rome if you want.  Buffy could use someone who does paperwork."

"You're ruining the Council!" she said hotly, standing up.

"No I'm not.  This is the Council's job, Beth.  Not to be in society.  Travers was an attention whore.  The rest of us do the real work of the Council.  If you don't like that, I'm sorry.  I don't care, but I'm sorry.  The Council is here to support the slayers and help them when they hunt.  That's all our job is.  To research, help hunt, and to keep it out of the regular person's view.  Prestons broke those rules and so did Travers.  That's one reason why it was so easy to take down the Council when the First came."  She stomped off.  "If you want the Rome job, let me know by four," he called after her.  He walked down to security, seeing the unhappy looks.  "Be damned if I'm going to be told I have to change who I am to fit into some shallow mold that's not something we're supposed to be doing anyway," he told them.

"Was she fired?" the head of security asked.

"That's up to her.  I offered her a spot in Rome's region.  If she wants it she has to let me know by four.  If not, she stomped off so she quit."  They nodded, moving to take her ID out of the recognition system.  He went back upstairs.  "Guys, Beth quit."

"We heard," Sam admitted, smiling at him.  "Good luck finding another one."

"Giles has three that say they're bored."  He smirked, going to call him back.  "Cynthia, Xander.  Beth just huffed off because I won't go into society and I told her that's one of the reasons that was warping the Council before.  No, I need one but I need one who can handle hunting duties and that my younger kids do hit the office with me on paperwork days.  Thank you.  That would be fine.  I told her to let me know by four if she wanted to go help Buffy in Rome.  You did?  That's cool.  No, I kinda doubt it.  She kinda liked Travers ideals about everyone being in society.  Said we were the reason the Council was going to hell.  That's what I thought," he said at her smart remark.  He smiled at the curious looking kids.  "Thanks, Cynthia.  Tell Giles Talia is coming from Texas to cover Orlando for a few days while Chris is getting straightened out by Cera.  Yeah, complained totally.  Thank you."  He hung up and went to look over Beth's desk.  He groaned, finding a few invitations on her desk.  "Crap, she was going to accept some of those," he muttered.

Dean came out to look over his arm.  "Party invitations?"  Xander grimaced but nodded. "We can turn them down politely.  Sammy knew some heirs at Stanford and got manners classes I'd assume.  Lawyers need them."

"Maybe."  He sat down to go over his scheduling book.  "Shit, she had me scheduled for one last night.  Nice of her to let me know."  He found that one's invitation filed and sent her a very nice letter explaining why he hadn't been there, including that his assistant had agreed he'd go without checking with him first.  He did politely tell her that he wasn't the 'society sort' and that he doubted he'd be able to go to any events as it could bother his current job.  Dean nodded that it sounded good when he let him see it.  They looked up as someone stomped in.  "Prentis."

"Harris?" he demanded.  Xander grinned and nodded.  "Where's Preston?"

"Did you not hear about the First?" he asked patiently.

"Well, yes, but Preston said that he had protections."

"He was trying really hard by killing about seventy people to drain them for the spell," Xander told him.  The other watcher shuddered.  "We spent my first few weeks as regional head here cleaning up his mess.  Did you know he was in society?"

"I'd assume so.  Travers did like it that way."

"Travers was an attention whore and it's hard to hunt when you have attention put on you."

"None of the regional heads would've hunted, Harris," he said dryly.

"The Council had more people then," Dean pointed out.  "Now you don't."

"Are you a Watcher?" Prentis asked.

"Dean Winchester, this is Prentis Hall.  He's the guy who's handling the regional problems in England for Cera.  Prentis, this is Dean.  He and his brother are both hunters who signed on.  They have kids in my twins' year at school.  He's my hunter on staff and Sam's my head of research locally."

"That's beneficial I suppose.  I heard from Beth.  I was coming down to check on the problems in Orlando."

"I sent Chris to Cera to get her straightened out."  He grimaced.  "She's been dumped, was complaining that she had to work to pay her rent, got an STD, all that great stuff."

Prentis grimaced.  "Yes, Cera would smack her around greatly," he decided.

Xander grinned and nodded.  "You'll find most of us go on the practical principle anymore, Prentis.  What else is up?  I don't see it mentioned that you were coming this way."

"I thought I'd pop in on Preston for lunch.  I didn't schedule with Beth.  Her day off?"

"She stomped off in a snit," Dean told him.  "We're not society hos."

"Oh, dear.  Yes, she was going in his place I'd assume."  Xander shrugged.  "Good point.  Any good news?"

"Talia, from Texas, is coming to cover Orlando.  Chris complained that her telephone job was making her too tired to hunt.  Talia said it's her off season."

"So you're the regional head?" he made sure.  Xander nodded.  "That is very interesting.  Do the others know?"

"I called Egypt about their current issue.  Thailand knows because I was handling that."

"You do realize he's Giles' second-in-command too?" Dean asked.

Prentis gave him a horrified look.  "You are?" he demanded.  Xander nodded.  "We never heard that!"

Xander dialed Giles' cellphone, a present from Buffy.  "Giles, it's Xander.  Prentis is here to go over some problems he's heard about."

"Rupert, good to hear from you again," Prentis said.

"Prentis Hall, I haven't heard from you in ages.  How is England doing?"

"Quite good but some demons had given Cera some news about the regional office down here that were disturbing her.  I thought I'd take a break to snoop and check in with Preston."

"Unfortunately he didn't last much beyond the building blowing in England," Giles admitted.  "Caused quite a mess as well from what I understand."

"Xander told me that."

"Xander, are you still there?" he asked.

"I am.  Who's Cynthia sending me?"

"Cynthia, who are you sending to Xander for support staff?"  She said something that wasn't really audible.  "Xander, what was her problem with you being the head?"

"I'm not in society, she wanted things the way they were under Travers, and I'll be damned if I'm going to hang out with rich people who have no sense.  She wanted me to change into a mindless mimbo who shops for pleasure."

"Ah.  That's reasonable.  We do have a young, bouncy woman up here in training if you'd like to finish it."

"I do bring the kids to the office, Giles."

"I'm aware of that.  I'll make sure before I let Cynthia send Etta."

"That's fine.  Anything coming our way?"

"Not at the moment.  Prentis, are we having other problems that you've heard?"

"Only the problem in Egypt."

"I told him to get my report from Cera where I took one out," Xander said.

"She got that request and looked it up for him.  He was apparently not impressed.  Then again, you're not one of the girls, Harris."

"I know that.  Even if I was, it's still got nearly unbreakable skin.  That's why I had to use artillery."

"Bullets?" Dean asked.

"Didn't pierce anything.  I used fifty caliber rounds and it didn't pierce anything but a toe."

"I do loathe those demons," Giles agreed.  "Xander, does your researcher have anything more on the opening attempt coming up?"  Dean texted that to his brother.

Sam came out with a book, copying and faxing the pages to him.  "I sent it via fax, Mr. Giles."

"Thank you, Samuel.  You're better than half of my own staff.  They looked at it and were confused."

"Sammy's a great researcher," Dean told him.

"He was on-the-fly translating a kiddy book to latin for the littler trio," Xander said with a grin for Sam.

"That's impressive.  Those children of yours are quite particular about their books."

"It was fun," Sam told him.  "The kids asked."  He leaned on the desk.  "That's all I've found down here."

"We may have more references in the back corridors," Prentis offered.  "Which opening attempt?"  Sam showed him the book, letting him read it over.  "We heard about this one but we thought it happened last century.  Back in Harris' time in high school helping Buffy."

Xander looked then shook his head.  "Nope.  That wasn't us.  That's the Cleveland hellmouth."  He pointed.  "That's the word they use for Cleveland in most prophecies I've seen.  Sunnydale is the Dark One in anything by that seer."

"I forgot that only some knew that there were multiple ones," he admitted, handing the book back.  "So everything's handled locally?"

"You did get the news that Willow's finding spell didn't look at women of all ages?" Xander asked.  Prentis shuddered.  "We've found a few that got missed by it originally.  I'm trying really hard not to nag the one in the local police department.  She's good with a lot of things already.  She's from New Orleans."

"Then she's got some idea probably," Prentis agreed.  "I still thought he would've lived with what he said he had."

"He was also embezzling funds," Dean told him.  The other watcher glared at him.

"Truth.  We found his emergency bunker with the money he was paying people who didn't exist, some dead bodies, and some drugs."  Prentis gaped in horror.  "Then we had to destroy the main house here to find all the bodies he hid.  Plus his other working areas.  The local crime lab was not amused at all the bodies he had done."

"Oh, Dear Lord," Prentis muttered.  "Yes, I suppose that's bad.  Did we get the money back?"

"We took what was in the vault," Xander assured him.  "That covered it.  Then I gave them his hidden accounts so they could trace back some of his supply chain.  They'd like Miami without drug dealers some year."

"I think we all would," Prentis agreed.  "London could do with a few less as well."  He shifted.  "Rupert, did you have anything coming our way?"

"Not at the moment," Rupert said.  "There's been no prophecies or anything.  Though, Xander, we did find one that dealt with the small start of a hellmouth you have down in your areas."

"It's on a privately owned Key," Xander told him.  "We know where it is though."

"Any idea if we can buy it?" Prentis suggested.

"I doubt the convent overtop of it would like that," Dean told him.  "They have a retreat there."

Prentis sighed, shaking his head.  "That's probably a good thing at least.  The white light energy might help keep it shut."

"Not that others won't try to open it anyway," Rupert told him.  "We seem to have someone trying, Xander.  It looks like it's in about three weeks."

"I'll look into it.  Send me the notes, G-man."

"Xander," he said, sounding exasperated.  "What have I told you about using that horrid nickname?"

Xander grinned at the phone.  "You needed the blood pressure relief anyway, Giles."  He hung up, looking at him.  "If you want we can have dinner.  I don't discriminate against other watchers."

"No, that's all right.  I'm sure your children will want you to have someone cook for them."

"He does," Dean told him.  "He's a pretty good parent to all eight of them."

"Eight?" he asked, looking alarmed.

"Three very young slayers, my twins, and the three youngest," Xander agreed.  He pulled out a picture to show him.  "I adopted all that aren't biologically mine."

Prentis stared for a moment.  "I would have run from that many children," he said honestly.  "I can barely stand my two some days."

"Dawn lives with us," he said with a manic grin.  "She's doing internship hours right now for medical school."

Dean nodded.  "She teaches them all sorts of bad things about being a girl like makeup and fashionable clothes."

"Your daughter still wanted a touring bike the other day," Xander pointed out.

"Not a roadster?" Sam asked with a grin.  "I've seen her pet one in the past."

"Nope.  She said a touring bike had storage so she could have weapons.  Just like you guys' trunk."

"At least she's being logical," Dean decided.  "She still can't ride a hog."  He looked at the stunned Watcher.  "Sammy and I both have a baby in kindergarten this year.  They're in his daughter Bri's class."

"That's wonderful.  That way the children can have friends who know about the life so they don't have to gloss over stories."  He checked the clock.  "Not home yet?"

"Martial arts club today," Xander said with a grin.

"Wonderful.  I'm sure they'll make splendid watchers some year."

"If they want," Xander agreed.  "I won't make them pick a career until they're old enough."

"I know you Americans are like that," he agreed.  "Well, if there's nothing going on, then I'll partake of some of your city's highlights and then go back to watching Cera try to be as tough as Faith was."

"Cera is as tough as Faith was," Xander assured him.  "They got along so well because they had similar pasts and they thought a lot alike.  Faith saw her as a little sister."

"We do miss her," Prentis said with a sad smile.  "We know she died saving Cera from the demon who was on a drug-induced rampage but it was a shame."

"I'm sure the Powers have a special job they'll be sending her back for," Xander said, staring him down.

"You've had a vision of this?" he asked calmly.

"Not fully but I've got news that she's earned a better job this time."

Prentis smiled.  "That's good.  She did deserve it.  No matter how often we fought because she was less uptight than everyone else.  Not to mention her funny slang issues."  He left, going out to find a hooker in a decent club for the night.

Dean looked in the office then at him.  "He's not asleep."

"Caleb?"  He peeked around the door.  "We good?"

"Yeah, we're good," he said with a grin.  He went back to his coloring.  It was good that his last life was still missed.  It meant he had been liked.

Xander looked at the boys.  "Sam...."

"Getting onto that hellmouth issue," he agreed, going to look it up.

Xander looked at Dean.  "That drug dealer thing?"

"Called Eric Delko earlier about it after cruising by there.  There is a ghost, he's been preying on the dealers.  They're going to clean out the dealers and we'll get the ghost later on.  Personally I don't care if he does smack drug dealers into walls.  Saves me from having to kick their asses."  He walked off to check on the kids.

Xander went back over all the stuff Beth had been hiding from him.  He hoped Etta was a nice young woman.  It would be nice if they could get along, plus if she liked the kids.  He checked the time and got his keys, heading out to pick up all the little heathen future hunters.  It was his turn.

***

Xander looked over as Dean walked the cat into the house once again and handed him to Bri this time.  "How did she get past the wards?" he asked with a grin.

"No damn clue," Dean admitted.  "I even put up cameras.  She suddenly climbed up onto the hood without seeming to be there before."

Xander looked at the cat then at Dawn, who had her nose in a book.  "Dawnster," he started.

"I already checked, she's not magical," she said, turning a page.  "She's sneaky.  Like you getting chocolate, Xander."  She looked up at him with a grin.  "I remember you doing pretty good with that task."

"Now and then," he agreed, staring at the cat his daughter was cooing at.  "Is she pregnant?"

Dean shrugged.  "How would I know?"

"Bri, is she pregnant?"

Caleb looked over then shrugged.  "No.  She's getting chubby off the squirrels.  She'll be going into heat soon."

"How do you know this?" Dawn asked.

"She told me."  He smirked at her.  "She's a familiar."

"Huh," Xander said, looking at the cat.  "Familiar for who?"  The cat stared at him.   "One of the Winchesters?  If not, stay off the car.  Dean will shoot you with rock salt.  He says it hurts like hell, cat."  She licked her paw and cleaned her ears.  "Good, you did hear."  He smirked.  "Stay off the cars.  Find somewhere else to piss them off."  He looked at Dean.  "Familiars are generally smart enough to listen.  Sometimes."

"When they want to?" Dean joked.

"Yup."  He grinned back.  "Cynthia said that Etta's very bouncy and young.  A bit green.  Has some skill gaps we can fix."

"Like typing or like Latin?"

"No clue but she'll be here tomorrow."

"I'll warn Sam.  Are we bringing the tots in?"

"We probably should since I still don't like that preschool."

"It's good for them to socialize," Dawn reminded him patiently.

Everett snorted.  "They're stupid."

"No name calling," Dean ordered.

Sauda shrugged.  "They don't like books and say we're stupid for liking books."

"Shouldn't they be teaching you guys stuff?" Dawn asked.

"Yeah," Xander said dryly.  "So I think we're going to be talking to the preschool people tomorrow."  She smirked at him.  "What?  I'll be fine without backup."

"I'll start looking for a better one."  She got up to start that search, making Dean snicker.  She grinned back at him.  "I've seen Xander rip into someone until they were ready to kill themselves.  I'm sure they'll be sorry."

"Quite probably," Dean agreed.  "I'd do the same thing."  He patted Xander on the shoulder.  "Thanks for sending dinner."

"Not a problem."  He grinned.  "I made too much."

"It was good."  He walked off, heading back to the house.  Sammy should hear about the preschool problem so they could both laugh tomorrow when someone called to complain about Xander's mouth.

***

Dean wandered into the kitchen to start breakfast the next morning, finding the little beast on top of the coffee maker.  "If I have to clean cat fur out of there, you're being shaved," he warned.  The cat stretched but didn't move.  Dean picked her up and dropped her onto the floor.  "Go wake up the kids and Sammy."  She stared up at him.  "You're not my cat.  I'm not feeding you."  He blew out the coffee pot to make sure there weren't any stray cat hairs then started his morning coffee.  "Sammy!" he bellowed.

Sam stumbled into the kitchen in his boxers and t-shirt, his hair sticking up in all directions as he stared at the cat.  "What are you doing in here?"

"She was on top of the coffee maker."

Sam grunted, picking it up to look at.  "Go home," he snarled.  "Bobby isn't allowed to be a witch."  The cat gave him a silent meow.  "I don't care if any of my gifts did pass on, the kids can't do magic.  Go bother Amanda since she can."  He put her down with a pat on the head.  "Don't bother us before coffee.  We tend to be grumpy and mean."  She strolled off, going to check on the kids for them.  Sam picked her up and dropped her outside the door.  "I told you no."  He slammed the door and went back to his get morning coffee.

"Nightmares?" Dean asked dryly.

"Few.   My son dating a girl who acts like you."  He walked off sipping his coffee.  "It's going to be a long day, I'd get up now," he called into the kids' rooms.

"I'm up, Uncle Sam," Missy called.  "I'm picking out my clothes."

Sam looked in at his son, the lump of blanket monster.  "Bobby."  He took another sip, leaning on the door frame.  "Bobby!" he called louder.  His son grunted.  "Robert James Winchester!" he bellowed.  His son jumped and looked around.  He took another sip.  "It's six-thirty.  Time to bathe, eat, get ready for school, all that stuff."

He glared at his father.  "Dad, you're mean.  Have more coffee."  He put the cover back over his head.  "I took a bath last night."

"You can still get up and eat," Dean called as he walked behind Sam.

"I'm tired!  I had nightmares all night!"

Dean backtracked to look at the lump under the blankets.  "Nightmares for what reason?" he asked patiently.  Bobby snored at him.  He rolled his eyes, going in to uncover him and wake him up again.  "Nightmares?" he asked.  "About what?"

"Evil shits who do bad things to kids."

"Shit, he did inherit my visions," Sam muttered.  He finished his coffee, going to call Xander.  "We're keeping Bobby out of school today.  We think he's having visions.  Won't wake up fully either.  Thanks.  Sure, you can take Missy for us."  He hung up.  "Missy, you're riding in with the others."

"Yes, Uncle Sam."  She went to the kitchen to put some microwave bacon into the microwave and make herself a bowl of cereal.  She looked up as her father came in, staring at her breakfast.  "Is he getting the creepy mind powers Uncle Sammy has?" she asked, taking a bite of her cereal.  The microwave beeped so she got out her bacon, blowing on it before eating.

"It looks like he's got visions.  You haven't had any, right?"

She shook her head.  "No, Daddy.   If I did, I might have to beat someone up.  I don't want to be creepy that way.  Evil but not creepy."  He gave her a hug and a smile, going back to helping her cousin.  So she got the door when it was knocked on.  "Hi, Paka.  Bobby's still in bed."

"He's still not my boyfriend."  She jogged up the stairs, nudging Sam so he'd look down.  She handed him an envelope.  "Daddy said that helped Aunt Cordy when she was alive.  He also said that there's different types of visions and seers.  He's not sure if he's got the same sort you do or if it was gifted like hers.  He said if it was gifted he had a present for the Powers as he walked off muttering about his artillery babies."  She grinned.  Then she bounced off again.

Sam looked in the envelope.  "I think this is for a tea."  He went to make some, following half-dose directions on the front.  He brought in a mug.  "It smells foul but your uncle says it works on other seers."

"Eww.  Sugar?" he begged.

"We don't know if it'll hurt it," he said.  "Sorry.  We'll ask later."  Bobby gulped it, making a disgusted face.  But the tension lines around his forehead eased.  "No more headache?"

"Less of one.  Now I feel like I have a cold."  He handed back the mug, covering his head again.  "Do I have to go to school?" he whined.

"No," Sam said.  "You can write out what you saw though."  He smirked.  "Then you can babysit the younger kids for a few hours."  Bobby sighed but nodded, getting up to go eat.  He looked at Dean.  "I needed that stuff."

"We need the recipe," Dean agreed.  Missy heard the honk and looked.  "They're early."

Paka ran into the house, grabbing Missy and her backpack.  "Daddy's too tired to cook.  We're having pancakes."  Bobby turned green, running to get sick.  "We'll get her to class on time."  She dragged her buddy off to the van.  "C'mon, Daddy found IHOP."

"Cool!  It's unlimited pancakes."

"Exactly," Xander agreed dryly.  He made sure she was hitched in then headed off with the kids to eat.  It was expensive but necessary.  He really didn't feel like cooking today.

***

Dawn looked Bobby over then came out to talk with the worried Winchesters.  "He's not having real visions.  He's more far-viewing than anything."  Sam gave her a confused look.  "Visions predict the future.  Far-viewing tells you what's going on now."  He slumped, shaking his head.  "It's not a problem and I went over the mental shielding lessons with him.  I'm guessing that his sudden onset is because the hellmouth is being a butt at the moment.  It looks like the shielding exercises are working.  The headache tea is for once a day.  It's pretty common herbs.  He shouldn't need it again but he does need help going through the exercises."  She looked at Dean.  "By the way you look, did you get some too?"

"I had a strange dream about nuns."

She smirked.  "There's a convent retreat on top of the hellmouth down here, Dean."  He groaned.  She strolled off to report to Xander.  "Far-viewing."

"Excellent.  Much nicer than visions.  It can be blocked out," Xander said.  He looked up.  "Etta's going to be here after lunch."

"I heard.  The kids are planning on greeting her with a plea for cookies."  She smirked.  "They're being butts today.  Again."

"They're kids.  We all were, Dawn."

"All but me."

"Well, I'm sure you would have if you had been alive," he said dryly.

"True."  She bounced off again.  "Going to be a nerd."

"Go for it."  He went back to the paperwork of the day.  He hated paperwork.  Dean strolled in.  "He napping?"

"Watching cartoons with the younger set."  He took Xander's pen, making him look at him.  "Far-viewing?"

"It's like seeing it happen somewhere else.  It can be blocked off.  I don't know if it can be trained.  You'd need to ask someone like Wes, who knows demons who have that gift."

"Could it have been gifted?"

"Dean, why would the demon choose Sam?" he asked.

"Because he had the ability to have the gifts but it was latent," he said.  "I already figured that part out."

"And you're pretty perceptive.  You said your dad was too."  Dean shook his head slowly.  Xander nodded.  "Like higher magic gifts, they tend to run in families.  Wesley, out in LA, has studied more of that than we have.  I doubt a demon got him. You guys are hyper vigilant about that stuff.  Be thankful it's not visions.  This can be blocked out and maybe trained to be used on cue.  Visions killed Cordelia."

Dean nodded once.  "So, not a bad thing as creepy powers go."

"As Dawn was told, the more normal you see your powers as, the easier you get control of them.  The more you think it's freaky, the harder it is because you fight against being labeled a freak."

"I know but if we don't make them seem a bit odd, they'll let them out in public more often.  We don't want the kids to talk about it.  Beyond that, it is kinda creepy."

Xander nodded.  "It can be.  Be damned if I wanted visions."

Dean stared at him oddly.  "The one who did that is dead, right?"

"Yup."

"Good."

"He won't tell anyone, Dean.  Make him see it's the way he was born.  Like being born a brunette."

"I'll try but things  like that do tend to creep most hunters out."

Xander shrugged.  "He could be a full blown witch.  Then what would you do?"

"Sammy would probably cry," he admitted.  "Then find him a very good white magic teacher."

Xander pointed at the ocean.  "Devon, England.  They got Willow straightened out."

Dean nodded once at that information.  "We heard she had issues once."

"Magic addiction and then grief," Xander said, looking at him.  That just got another nod.  "She's better now."

"Good.  We like that answer.  Anything else we need to talk about with his funky abilities?"

"Call Wes out in LA, see if he can get you some tips for training it if it can be trained.  He works with some seers and others out there."

"I can do that.  Do we think it could be trained?"

Xander shrugged.  "I have no idea, Dean.  That's not something I've ever really looked into.   When I started having visions I knew I couldn't block them out, make them stop, or do anything to help them hurt less.  No need to research anything beyond swearing at the Powers."

"That's reasonable."  He went to look up Wesley's number in the internal phone book, finding it easily enough.  He called.  "Is Wesley there please?  Xander told me to call him for some information he might have.  Dean Winchester.  We signed on to help Xander in Miami."  The phone was handed over after a few quiet words on their end.  "Wesley?"  He smiled at that information.  "That's fine, miss.  It seems my nephew has broken out in something Dawn Summers and Xander called far-viewing?"  She repeated that and read what he was apparently writing.  "That's why he wanted me to call you.  To see if it could be trained and if so, did you know how to do that."  He took notes on what he was given.

"Do you think the same thing could help seers if their visions weren't gifted to them by a higher power?  We have a family friend who has visions thanks to a demon tainting them in the past.  No, they were a child.  Long story but the demon's dead and the visions remain, along with a few other creepy mind powers."  He winced at that information.  "Basically, yeah.  I take it you heard about Azazel and all that shit?  One of them."  He made a new note under a line he drew.  "That's good to know.  So those exercises will help and we can work on both of them?"  He nodded.  "Thank you for that help.  Miami.  Xander's the regional head."

He heard the squeaky sounding laughter and smiled.  "He's not doing too bad so far.  No, I met him because our kids are in the same class as his twins."  He nodded at her babbling about the girls.  "They're presently being warped, yeah.  Thank you.  Let us know if you hear anything going on down here please.  My brother's head researcher of this branch at the moment.  Thanks, dude."  He hung up and went to tell Sammy.  "Both of yours can be trained.  That's the book on how the taint works and what you can do to train it to react normally so you don't step over the line.  That's the stuff on how to train Bobby.  Wesley had to write it down since his throat was cut late last year."

Sam looked it over.  "We have two of those books but not the one on the taint that I've seen."  He looked it up.  "Bobby doesn't have it listed in his collection either."  He bit his lip, doing an online search for it.  "Hmm.  Looks like there's a few copies out of England."

"Hey, Xander?" Dean called.  "What happens if we need a book to help Bobby and Sammy?"

Xander strolled in.  "You call the head researcher up in Cleveland and see if we have a copy she can send down."  He smiled.  "If she doesn't, she'll call the secondary guy in England and have him find one in all the former watchers' libraries."  He looked at the list.  "I've seen it around Cleveland.  Willow was looking at it to see if the information had anything on how hellmouths can taint powers."  He looked at Sam.  "Need her address?"

"She sent it to me."  He grinned.  "Thanks."

"You can't be any stranger than the lounge singing demon seer that Angel works with, Sam."

"There is one?" Dean asked, looking confused.

"An Anagogic demon I think they said.  He sees your future when you sing for him.  He runs a karaoke bar.  A demon one with non-violence charms, but yeah, a demonic karaoke bar."

Dean shook his head quickly.  "You're right, he's not any stranger than that."

"Thank you, God," Sam added.

Xander grinned.  "Lorne's a nice guy.  Dresses a bit louder than I do, but a nice guy."

"We need to go over the classification manuals," Dean decided, looking at Sam, who nodded quickly.  Xander got down the first few and handed them over.  "All of them?"

"The beginning set.  The girls already know those and are working on the individual classes."  He pointed at that shelf.  "That's individual cases, clans, and other problem things that people have done in-depth studies on."  He walked off after finding his own book.  "Etta's here in an hour."

"Sure," Dean agreed, waving limply after him.  He sat down to go over those books.  There were whole types of demons they hadn't heard of.  Sam sent that message to Willow, nearly getting brained by a book.  Not the right book so he sent why he needed that one.  She said to keep that one, it was frustrating her anyway, and sent the one they needed.  It was something for him to go over.  He didn't want his son to be cursed like he was.  Dean looked over in the middle of reading.  "There's a flesh eating species that's considered on the side of good.  They only eat bad guys."

"Interesting but gross," Sam decided.  He took the books, switching off with Dean.  "Definitely gross."

Dean nodded, going over how to train people with various sight gifts.

***

Xander looked at his new secretary.  "Etta, welcome to Miami."

"Thank you, Mr. Harris."

"Xander."

"Xander then."  She smiled, bouncing until she realized it then she stopped herself.  "I heard you had a problem with your last secretary?"

"She decided the last guy being in society was a role model I should follow.  I disagreed.  I'm a practical sort not a fanciful, society sort.  Our hunters on staff are as well.  So are our kids."

"I got told you had children.  I'm not any good with them but I'll try not to scare them."

Xander nodded.  "That'll work.  They might try to con you into baking for them.  If so, tell them no."

"I can't cook so I'll make sure they realize that."  She smiled.  "Were there other conflicts or just that one?"

"She thought Travers was the be all and end all of the universe.  I knew what an asshat he was."

"My mother used to be his personal assistant so I heard."

"Good.  Your desk is out there.  The two tall guys are our staff hunter and head researcher for the local office.  Dean's the hunter and shorter one.  They have two of their own, Missy and Bobby."

"I can remember that."

Xander smiled.  "We're looking for anything else the last guy, Preston, hid among our files.  He killed a good number of people and we might need to hand over that information to the crime lab."

"Yes, sir."

"Sam tries to live in the library.  Dean and the kids try to make him take breaks now and then.  Half the time my kids are upstairs in one of the emergency apartments watching cartoons or playing if they're not in here with me.  The rest are in school."

"Should I go pick them up?"

"They won't let you.  The school is picky about that."  She nodded at that.  "Some day I might add you to that list but I'll wait to see if we click first."

"That's only reasonable, Xander."

"Good.  Otherwise, you do secretarial things for us.  Make sure I see incoming information.  Make sure anything going on with the girls is taken down.  We have four girls in our region, one who's very much above the usual age.  She hasn't come in to get tested or training but I know she is.  She admitted one came looking for her when she was ten."  Etta nodded at that.  "It's not a hard job.  I'm not mean unless the kids kept me up all night or someone does something totally stupid."

"Dress code?"

"Comfy.  Reasonable if outsiders come in.  The basic 'don't look like a ho' command.  I'm not Giles.  If you wanna wear heels, that's your thing, not mine."

"Understood."  She smiled and relaxed some.  "Coffee and those things?"

"Miami's incredibly hot," he reminded her.  "We tend to drink a lot of soda."  She nodded at that.  "Beyond that, I can run out and get my own.  I don't need a slave, Etta, just a helper."

"I'll do what I can.  I hope I live up to expectations."

"I hope you don't try to ambush me like she did.  She actually signed me up for a social event then didn't tell me."

"Oh, dear."

"You sound a lot like Giles when you say that," he teased with a smile.

"I should.  I'm distantly related to him."  She walked out to check her desk over.  "There's no pens."

"I don't mind computers, but there's a storage area behind you."

She went to get herself some.  Then sat down to restraighten the desk out for her use.  Someone was messy.  She found all the day's paperwork waiting in the fax machine, bringing it to him, making him groan.  "Paperwork makes every company and business go 'round," she said cheerfully.

"Doesn't mean I can't hate it," he shot back with a weak smile.  "I hate being Giles' second some days."  She gave him an awed look.  "I'm the same Xander, yeah."  She nodded, going back there.  That apparently explained enough to her that she could do her job well enough.  Xander got back to the dreaded paperwork that Giles had foisted off on him yet again.  Some day soon he'd have to retire and make Giles do his own paperwork.

***

Missy cornered Bri on the playground to hiss in her ear.  "We need to help Auntie Dawn and Uncle Sam."

Bri looked at her.  "They'll be even more mad than our dads were."

"Not that sort of help, Bri.  We need to put our girl powers to one of them so they notice the others."

"I don't think Auntie Dawn needs that help.  She's very shopping and fashionable when she's not so tired from work."

"But Uncle Sam isn't."

"True.  Your uncle can wear the same sort of ugly shirts my dad can."  The teacher looked over.  "We're plotting how to get our families joined so the pack's the strongest it can be," she offered with a grin.

The teacher stared for a moment.  "Do your parents realize you're plotting?"

"Daddy's ignoring the fact that it is so a marriage when you lock him in a room with someone else," Missy told her.

"How about we talk to your parents for you?"

"That probably won't help," Bri told her, looking totally serious.  "They're being stubborn and even more girlish than we are."  The teacher snickered at that, walking off shaking her head to warn those poor parents.  She looked at her best friend and grinned.  "How should we start with Uncle Sam?"

"His hair or his clothes?  I don't think nail polish will help him very much.  Maybe some lipstick though.  The tv said that lipstick makes people want to kiss you.  All the girls who wear it get kissed.  Daddy said that's why I can't even wear lip gloss."

Bri considered it then smiled.  "We'll need some help since we're locked out of the armory."

"B'letta might help," Bobby suggested.  They stared at him.  "I'd like to see Dad happy and Auntie Dawn seems nice.  Not like your dad's usual girlfriends, Missy."

"True.  She's not a skanky ho."  She looked at her partner in mischief.  "Think she might?"

"I think she might if we ask really nicely.  But we'll have to be away from the daddies to ask.  They'll hear otherwise."

"We can do that."  Missy smirked evilly.  "Am, me, and Bobby all have to go shoe shopping later with Auntie Dawn."

"That may work," Bri agreed, looking around for her twin.  She waved her over, making her trudge over.  "We've got to work on Uncle Sam and Auntie Dawn."

Amanda looked at her.  "I don't want spanked."

"All you have to do is ask B'letta to help us," Missy told her.  "That way we get what we need to help them.  I'd like to see them happy."

"So would I but Auntie Dawn will spank."

"Not if we make it subtle," Bri told her.

Amanda sighed.  "I'll see if she'll come down to talk to us later when we're shoe shopping."  She went to make her own plans so she could avoid being spanked this time.  Daddy had gotten really mad the last time.  Auntie Dawn would be worse since she was sleepy and grumpy recently.

***

Dawn looked at Sam as he wandered into the kitchen.  "What are you doing over here, Sam?"

Sam blinked.  "This isn't home."

"No, it's not," she said dryly.  She stared at his face, then his hair, and then his nails.  "Damn they're good.  They got the good points of subtle makeup to highlight down very well from me."

Sam gave her a confused look.  "Huh?"

Xander came out, giving Sam's back a funny look.  "Why are you here....  Sam, have you looked in a mirror?" he asked when the other guy turned to look at him.  He walked Sam to the bathroom and shut the door.  "Tell Dean he's here?"

"Sure."  She called over there.  "Dean, Sam's here.  The girls struck."  She hung up.  Dean walked in a few minutes later.  She pointed at the bathroom.  "He's been in there for ten minutes.  They did really good highlighting his bone structure and his eyes."

Dean gave her a confused look, heading for the bathroom.  "Sam?" he called.  The door opened and he looked at his brother.   His hair had been cut so it was short, spiky, and messy.  Clearly they had tried really hard to make it cute.  His eyes were lined with green eyeliner.  His cheekbones had a hint of blush to highlight the structure of the bones.  His lips had a nice red tinge to them.  He looked at his nails, Missy's recent speciality.  They were clear polished and cleaned up.  "I'll go find Missy while Dawn finds Bri."

Sam looked at him.  "Can you....."

"Yeah, I'll beat her so you don't beat her to death, Sammy."  He walked off shaking his head.  The cat got shoved off the car's roof as he walked past it.  "Not on the car, cat.  If you scratch it I'm using your tail to buff out the problems."  He walked into the house.  "Melissa Mary Winchester, I'd fucking hide," he shouted.  He heard a male squeak, going to look at his nephew.  "Did you have something to do with your father's new look?"

"Daddy needed a haircut?" he guessed.

Dean nodded.  "Let's get you two breakfast out and a quick run to school so I don't have to see Sammy commit infanticide."

"What's that?" Bobby asked.

"That's where your dad is going to kill you.  Maybe by the time the school day's done, he'll be calm enough to beat you without killing you both."

"It's club day, Uncle Dean."

"That might save you for a few more hours.  I don't suggest you try to get away though.  Get dressed, hit the car.  Melissa, hit the car.  Before your uncle finds you."  She ran for the car in her pajamas.  Dean got her the clothes she had laid out, handing them over.  "Change quickly.  Your aunt said you guys did a nice job on the makeup though."

"I did the nails," she said proudly.

"Don't worry, Bri's hiding too."  She changed and got into the back.  Bobby came out with their backpacks and climbed into the back too.  Dean took them both to school via IHOP.  It was safer to be away from Sammy right now.  They met Xander's kids there too so he knew it was bad.  Sammy would normally let Xander beat his own kids.  "Sammy screaming?"

"No, he's very calm."

"That's a bad sign," Bobby agreed.  "How did his hair turn out?"

"It looked really good," Adanne told him.  "Spiky and cute."

"Thank you," he said, grinning at her.

"It won't save you from your dad killing you," Dean assured him.  "Or Bri or Missy."

Xander looked at his daughter.  "Nice makeup job on Sam's face, dear."

"Thank you.  Auntie's magazines were very helpful."

"Maybe she should be grounded from anything but Shakespeare?" Dean suggested.

"If she could read it, I'd make her read all the old English authors that used to put us to sleep in school."  He ate a bite then checked his watch.  "Twenty minutes."  They went back to eating.  He looked at Dean.  "Found Dawn's camera phone.  They took multiple pictures."

"Think I can get one for later taunting?" he asked hopefully.  Xander handed over her phone.  "Won't she miss it?"

"She's off today and they know to call the house when she's off."

Dean looked at the pictures.  Sam really did look good in the makeup.  "Did you guys shave him too?  I don't see any stubble."

"I used Auntie Dawn's electric razor," Missy said proudly.

"How did you keep him asleep?" Xander asked.  "I know you guys didn't get into the sleeping gas again."  A nearby table gave him a horrified look with their gasp.  "Security system in case of intruders."  He looked at them again.  "Well?"

"B'letta helped," Bri said.  "She thinks they'd be cute together too."

"She didn't seem evil when we met her," Dean quipped.

"I'll let Dawn talk to her," Xander said dryly.  "Hurry up."  They inhaled the rest of breakfast and headed for the school.   He saw the concerned looking teacher.  Missy and Bri didn't have their hair done and they were sloppily dressed.  "We had to evacuate.  They gave Bobby's dad a makeover while he slept."

"That bad?" she asked with a small smile.  He showed her the picture, making her gape.  "Oh, dear."

"Oh, yeah.  We had breakfast out so he could scrub."  He waved at the kids.  "Be safe until Uncle Sam gets you guys."  They all hurried inside.  He couldn't get to them at school.  "I know they have martial arts club today.  I'll see them then."

"Of course, Mr. Harris.  Oh, thank you for those books."

"Not a problem.  My kids have outgrown them.  Even the younger three."  He smiled and walked off, heading to the office.  He walked past his secretary's desk.  "Etta, Sam's going to be late.  If you need him badly, call him at home."

"I can do that."  She made that note, getting back to the paperwork that had come from all over the globe.  When Sam came in she smiled.  "I didn't know you were getting a haircut.  It looks nice, Sam."

"I'll remember not to cut my son's fingers off for doing it while I slept.  Xander in?"

"Yes he is."  She smiled once he was gone.  His son had good ideas.  The shorter hair looked nice on him.

Xander looked up.  "Missed some of the lipstick."

"It won't come off."  He leaned down.  "Did you beat them yet?"

"No.  We're letting you beat them after martial arts today."

"Pictures?"

"They used Dawn's phone.  Dean has one, I have one.  I haven't sent it on but I did tell Buffy to yell at her minion for the makeover idea.  Bri did do a very good job on your makeup."

"She did.  Bobby did my hair?"  Xander grinned but nodded.  "Think it'd be okay if we did a seance upstairs?"

"Sure, go ahead," he said with a grin.  "I'm sure your mom would love to yell at him."

"No, this requires lack of tact.  Dad can yell at them.  Thanks."  He went up to set things up.  When it was time, he went to pick the kids up too.  They tried to run back inside.  "I will kill you all even if you didn't help them.  Into the van."  They fled for the van.  The three who were in trouble got into the very last seat.  They thought it'd save them but they were wrong.  He walked them all up to their former apartment, setting off the summoning circle.  His father slowly faded in, looking confused.  "Dad, these are your grandchildren," he said, pushing them forward.  "And their best friend."  He pushed her forward to.  "The rest of you scram if you didn't help."  They fled.  They knew Sam would kill them.  Sam showed him the picture he had taken earlier.  "While I was sleeping to set me up with Briony's aunt."

"I was going to tell you I liked the new haircut.  A bit fussy but cute," John said, looking at the guilty looking children.  "Whose bright idea was this?"  Missy slowly raised her hand.  He looked at the picture then at his granddaughter.  "Didn't your father have you baptized?"  She nodded.  "Are you possessed?"

"No, Grandad."

He smirked.  "Being cute won't help you any.  Dean tried that too.  It usually meant he got spanked for longer."  She shrank back.  "That won't save you either, Melissa."

"You've been watching over us, Grandfather?" Bobby asked.

He nodded.  "I've seen you both grow into good children.  Even when Melissa is a bit evil."  He looked at Bri.  "I've seen you recently.  Usually you're not that mean."

"The pack needs to be stronger," Missy told him, looking totally convinced.  "We married Daddy and Uncle Xander together by locking them in a room.  They're ignoring it but we did."

"They even slept together because we used sleeping gas," Bri added.

John looked at Sam.   "You tried, son."

"If you can't straighten them out, I'm going to wear their asses out worse than you did when you caught me and my friends using paintballs on your truck."

"Trying to kill your children isn't really permitted unless you're switching sides, son," John told him.

"I don't care right now.  We've tried everything else.  You're the last resort before I beat the living shit out of them."

"Why do I suddenly feel like the good cop?" John asked.

Sam just smirked.  "Dean and Xander evacuated them so I'd have time to calm down."

Dean came off the elevator, nodding at his father.  "Missy, homework?"

"It won't matter," Sam told him with an evil grin.  "She won't be alive for class tomorrow anyway if Dad can't stop them."

"Sam, I don't want to have to knock up some beach ho to get a new daughter.  I doubt she could be nearly as evil as this one is."

"Hey!" Missy complained, stomping a foot.

Bri looked at him.  "You're married to my daddy.  If you do that, that's cheating and wrong," she told him, looking totally serious.

"I'm starting to see the problem," John said.  "They're more stubborn than you both were combined."

"Think they'll give them to Mom?" Sam asked him.

John nodded.  "Possibly."  He sighed.  "Boys, let me talk to them?"  They went to sit on the couch.   He had managed to out-stubborn and straighten out his boys.  He could hopefully do it to his grandchildren.  Before some demon thought they were related and tried to claim them.  He carefully countered each argument the kids made.  He had learned to reason with Sammy's stubborn nature.  But when it got to the point of mule-headedness he looked at his sons.  "Sammy, you're wearing a belt, right?"

"I won't stop, Dad.  That's why you're here."

"I'm sure you will," John complained.

Sam shook his head.  "No I won't.  I won't have my son going that evil.  Or my niece.  Xander's going to beat his own for me later."

"Now I see why you called Dad," Dean said.

"He should have called your mother.  She might be able to get through to the girls.  It seems that your son was only helping them, Sammy.  Plus the haircut does look nice."

"Doesn't mean he should talk to a demon to get help knocking me out so he could do it."

"No, that part he does deserve punishment for.  Even if she's a nice demon."  He glared at Bobby, who shrugged and pointed at Missy.  "You two are nearly as much trouble as your fathers."

"My daddy's perfect," Bobby complained.  "If he's not it's because you weren't good to him."

"Hey!" Dean shouted.

"It is!"

"I can see that infamous Winchester stubbornness got passed on undiluted," John said dryly.  "No, Bobby, I didn't screw up.  All humans are imperfect.  Not that you should have to realize that about your father already but he's human so therefore he has failings.  One of his was his mule-headedness."  Bobby glared at him.  "I definitely need Mary for this talk."  He was having the same urge to beat the kids his son was.  "She spanked your daddies first.  She should get the first real beating of the grandchildren."

"She did?" Sam asked.

"You tried to eat an ant trap, son.  It was only a swat."  He looked at his grandchildren again.  He could definitely see why his son had called him back to talk to them.

Xander came off the elevator, tossing a picture into the same summoning circle, bringing back two females.  "Ladies, your daughter and friend has warped these kids.  First my daughter and then she warped these two other children," he told the older woman and young adult.  "It's gotten down to the point of beating them senseless and I don't want to turn into my family."

Joyce Summers looked at the kids then at him.  "It looks like they're just as stubborn as you are, Xander."  She smiled.

"Apparently they're worse."

Tara nodded.  "We've seen.  We were giggling over the marriage thing."

Xander smirked.  "Now they're working on Dawn and this one's daddy," he said, pointing at Bobby's head.  "By giving him a very good makeover.  I need experienced parent advice.  Before I start wailing on their asses."

Joyce smiled then nodded.  "We can talk to them, Xander.  First these three then the others of yours."  She beamed at the little girl.  "I'm Buffy's mother, dear."

"Auntie Buffy taught me many important girl things you taught her," Bri said happily.

"I noticed that.  You dress like her."  She floated closer, pulling the children over to talk to them.  Clearly the grandfather wasn't getting it done well enough.  Tara helped by backing her up.  Bobby sighed at the girl discussion but Joyce drew him back in and helped him see that they were making the adults more stubborn so it'd never happen.  Then they went over the concept of subtlety.

John looked at his boys.  "She's good."

"Her daughter's the senior slayer that was a shopping auntie for my girls," Xander said smugly.  "She's the good parental role model I had."

"So they should meet anyway so the future in-laws can meet," Missy said happily.

John burst out laughing.  "Melissa, you're very stubborn.  Even more so than your father at your age."

She beamed.  "Thank you."

"You're also grounded.  No tv, no playing."

"So?  I can read.  Uncle Xander showed us what fun books are."

"And no fun books either.  Only homework, young lady."  She huffed.

"Oh, don't worry, some of mine will have that same restriction," Xander promised.  "Or maybe I'll let them work their way through lesser classical literature."

"Your children already read a lot," Joyce told him.  "You did good with them, Xander."  He beamed.  "This.... this is clearly worse than my girls were."  She looked at Bri.  "Dear, even if they did sleep next to each other, it's not the same as sleeping together.  That's an adult activity that takes longer than a few minutes."

"Not on the soaps Adanne and Buffy watch," Bri pouted.

"Clearly she taught you some bad girl habits too," Tara quipped.  "Soaps aren't real, Briony."

She sighed.  "Still, it doesn't take that long."

"It does when you're married and like it," Joyce said dryly. "If they were really married then they'd be in the same house as well."

The girls both pouted.  "Marriage is too important to rush," Tara chided.  "It should be built on love, not on the pack.  The pack can expand and still keep you two and your parents.  Xander needs more pack members."

"But if they're married then we won't have to leave them and we'll always be pack even if the daddies do take us hunting again," Missy told him.

"Dear, you'll be part of the pack even then," Xander assured her.  "Even if your dads totally piss me off, you'll still be pack members."

Missy looked at him.  "Promise?"

"Yup."  He gave her a hug.  "It doesn't mean I don't want to beat you but now and then I want to beat my own kids for doing stupid things too."

She beamed at her grandfather.  "See, he's good."

"Uh-huh.  Your daddy should still spank some of the evilness out of you, Melissa."

She pouted.  "I'm not that bad."

"Even the most evil of Winchesters never plotted to get his relatives married off," Dean told her.

"I tried to set Dad up once but you caught me and stopped me," Sam reminded him.  "She was a nice librarian."

"They're more sneaky than you two were," John told him.  "They have backup."

Xander smirked.  "My girls are very sneaky and have learned my planning skills."

Bri nodded.  "Someone has to make plans around the house so the kids don't overrun daddy.  That's one reason why we need a step-parent.  Even though B'letta's nice some day she'll have to pick her people over her family so we don't want that.  It would hurt daddy if he had to kill her.  We love her as an auntie anyway.  That's why Uncle Dean would make the perfect stepmommy.  They like the same things.  They both hunt bad things.  They like guns."

"Plus then I'd have a non-skanky ho stepmommy," Missy added. "Because one would teach me how to be one too.  I don't think I can roller skate."

"You can roller blade already," Xander reminded her.

"Yes but Bri's kept me from the booty shorts so I can't turn into a girl that daddy would like," she said firmly.  "She's saved me from a lifetime of booty shorts and tight shirts."

Dean groaned, covering his face with his hands.  "Missy," he whined.  Sam patted him on the back with a smirk.  "She learned that from you, Sammy.  Quit smirking," he said without having to look.

"I'd offer you Dawn but she's not that much into roller skates," Joyce joked.

"No, she fits very well with Uncle Sam," Bri told her.  "They're both very smart and do researchy stuff plus they like to work on computers and those things.  They fit very well.  That's why we gave Uncle Sam the makeover.  So Auntie Dawn would notice him more."

"She does notice him.  Sam doesn't realize when she's flirting," Xander told her.  "She needs to be less subtle on her days off."  He looked at her.  "She's doing very good but they work hellish hours."

"I know."  She looked at Bri.  "They're not a bad match.  It's still wrong to force them together, dear.  They'll get together if they're meant to be together."

"Parents always need help.  The movies Auntie Dawn watched with us had kids who helped their parents get together."

"You won't be seeing tv for nearly a year so don't worry about it," Xander said dryly.

Joyce laughed.  "That's mean, Xander."

He shrugged.  "I can't figure out anything short of beating them, Joyce."

"I know, dear."  She looked at John, who was shooting amused looks at his boys.  "They do have good taste."

"If my boys want to settle down with hunters, that's up to them."

"You do realize that the old Council died and the new Council is much nicer?" Xander said dryly.  John glared at him.  "We are.  And more practical.  Most of us were actually in the field."  He smirked.  "We're mostly the remains of the Sunnydale crew."

"You're a watcher?"

"I'm second in command," he said dryly.  "And I used to back up the slayers in Sunnydale."

"At least you hunted," he said dryly.  "You don't dismiss other hunters, right?"

"Nope.  If they want to take some of the burden more power to them.  If they need help learning stuff or researching stuff I'm all for it."

"We signed on while we're in Miami, Dad.  That way they pay tuition for a good school," Sam told them.  "Plus a paycheck and free housing."

"That'll be handy when you go back on the road," he said dryly.

Bobby glared.  "No more traveling for a while.  We need friends to grow up good people instead of bastards."

"Language," Sam snapped.

Bobby looked at him.  "I could've said miserable, friendless, homicidal bastards."

"And that added another two weeks to whatever grounding you have, son."

John looked at Sam.  "He's like your clone."

Sam grimaced.  "Often."

"Xander even turned the kids into book nerds," Dean agreed.  "My daughter read a book instead of watching tv with me last night, Dad."

He looked at her.  "Good.  That'll make you smarter when it's your turn."

She grimaced.  "Hunting means slime and other gross stuff, Granddaddy.  Eww."

Xander snorted.  "It can, yeah," he agreed at Joyce's dirty look.

"More often than not," she agreed dryly.  "You would not believe some of the stuff I managed to get out of my daughter's laundry."

"We had more blood than slime," John told her.

"Buffy always seemed to have slime from slaying."

Xander nodded.  "Thankfully you left notes for Dawn so we could teach the mini slayers."

Joyce smiled.  "You've done a good job, Xander."  He smiled.  "But I'm about to suggest spanking too."

Xander nodded.  "Which is what I've been trying to avoid.  Is it just being in Miami?  I know a good portion of the city can be shallow now and then.  Is it some sort of localized radiation?"

"No.  It's all the expectations of being pretty all the time," Tara told him.

Xander sighed.  "Maybe I should've taken over Houston then."

"You'd die in that heat," Joyce told him.  "Plus I don't think you want the girls to have a truck with a gun rack eventually?"

Xander shrugged.  "If they have to."

John huffed.  "Not everyone from Texas has a pickup truck," he said dryly.  "Dallas is the most hip city in the south."

"It's the New York of the South with Atlanta," Dean agreed.

Joyce smiled.  "Xander likes country music.  The girls would have a pickup with a gun rack.  So would he."

"You can't fit eight kids in one," Xander said dryly.

"Eight?" Joyce demanded.

"You guys didn't see the youngest three either?" he asked with a grin.

She sighed.  "Good point.  I'm sorry they're driving you insane, Xander."

Tara giggled.  "They're good kids most of the time."

Xander nodded.  "Thankfully."

Joyce sighed.  "I'd give you a hug but I can't.  You might suck me in too," she teased.

He smirked.  "Buffy would be very pissed at me if you possessed me, Joyce."

"Dawn might tear you apart trying to get her out," Dean countered.

"Possibly," Joyce agreed, looking at the two little girls again.  Clearly the Winchesters had no idea what to do about willful girls.  Xander was used to spoiled girls, and had prevented his from being spoiled, but they were so warped from it.  She sighed and moved closer to look at both girls, drawing them off to the side to talk to just them while John got Bobby.  Though Tara scowled at one thing and took over for him.  Clearly the boy needed a maternal influence.  Her daughter would do good at that.

Dawn came off the elevator, staring at her for a moment.  "Did they lock Xander and Dean in a room again?"

"They're keeping me from beating the kids over their plan to hitch us together the same way," Sam said with a grin.  "That's my dad."

"That's my mom."  She looked at Xander.  "Why call Mom back?"

"Because two of them are spoiled girls?  She's kinda used to girls."

"Yeah, if she could pull Buffy's head out of her ass, she could probably handle Missy and Bri."  Xander just grinned.  "Anyway," she decided.  "Etta's worried that we're doing black magic up here.  Let me reassure her and let Adanne know."  She went to do that before her mother got mushy and the girls talked her into their insane plans too.  Not that she didn't like Sam....  She walked off the elevator.  "They did a summoning circle to get some more experienced parents to talk to the kids, Etta."

"Who?"

"Sam and Dean's father, my mother, and Tara."

Etta whimpered.  "So magic?"

"Just a seance.  Mom's trying to convince the girls I can do my own wooing."  She looked up.  "I'm perfectly capable of tying him down if I want to, Mom," she called.  "Remind them of that.  All strong women can.  I was trying for subtle."  She looked at Adanne.  "My mom and Tara are talking to them."  The other girls squealed and headed up there.  "Caleb, Everett, so's Sam and Dean's daddy."  They went up to talk to them too.  It was pretty cool to talk to the ghosts.  She looked at Etta.  "Thanks."

"Welcome.  They're sweet little future research giants."  Dawn smirked at that.  "I've never seen a child that went for a book that fast.  Outside of Wesley but he wanted to play outside at that age."

"Xander owned a bookstore in Cleveland.  They spent a lot of time there with him."

"Ah.  No wonder."

"He makes them watch cartoons with him too."

She smiled.  "Hoping they'll be nerds like him?"

"Probably, yeah."  She went back to the elevator.  "Let me go talk my mom out of Bri's latest evil genius plan.  Let us know if you need help."

"I can do that.  Tell Xander to call Talia in Orlando?"

"I can do that.  Major bigs or just minor ones?"

"She needed some support for a hunt tonight."

"I can do that."  She went back up there.  "Xander, call Talia.  She needs backup."

"I can go," Dean told her.  "Sammy, can you babysit and not beat them all to death?"

"Maybe."

"If not, I can.  I'm off tonight," she assured him, taking her phone back from Xander's pocket.  She showed her mom and Tara a picture.  They both giggled and smiled at Sam.  "Remember, girls.  All strong women can hunt down their own man and trap him like the wild animal she wants him to be.  While I like Sam, he's been ignoring any flirting of mine so that's all on him.   Clearly not macho enough for me."

Missy poked him.  "If Uncle Xander wasn't married to Daddy I'd let you tame Daddy so he didn't need a skanky ho."

Dawn smiled.  "They're not married and I doubt Dean wants me, Missy.  Or he would've made himself clear about that already."

"You're cute and all but your brain scares me," Dean said with a smirk.

"Thanks, really."  She pouted.  "I'm not that smart.  Not like I'm in the top ten in medical schools.  I'm like thousands of others every year that get to this point."

"Shut up, Dawn.  You are so smart," Xander told her.  "Before I have to spank you."

She stuck her tongue out.  "Try it, Xander."

He grabbed her and swatted her, making the kids 'oooh' and wince.  "You were saying?" he asked, staring her down.

"Mean shit.  I should give you food poisoning so I have a case I can study."  She got free of him, going to sit between the two hunters.  "Save me?" she asked, batting her eyes at them.

"Sure," Dean agreed.

John shook his head.  "You're going insane, boys."

"You know, the monks could've made me one of yours instead," Dawn quipped with a smile.

Joyce looked at her.  "They wouldn't have been able to stop her either."

"They were always traveling.  She wouldn't have found me."

"That is a good point," Xander admitted.

"Huh?" John asked.

"Monks made her to house an artifact that a hell goddess wanted," he told him.  "They gave her to us to protect."

John just nodded.  "She'd have been Sammy's first child then.  Because only he gets into those sort of things."

Joyce pinched him.  "They made her be my first daughter's sister because she's a slayer.  Xander was our trouble magnet and she didn't get given to him."

"So, see, could've had a sudden teenage daughter," Dawn quipped with a grin.

"You would've driven us nuts beating all your boys up," Dean told her, looking serious.  "You'd still be a virgin and you'd be a shotgun toting woman who probably wanted to steal my car too."

John shuddered suddenly.  "Don't tempt the Powers, Dean."  He looked at the grandchildren again.  They were watching him.  "What?"

"Tell us about hunting something?" Paka asked.  "We need to hear more stories so we know how to hunt things when we're bigger slayers and it's our turn."

John blinked.  "You're a slayer?"  Xander nodded, pointing at his three.  "Why are there so many active?"

"The First Evil," Xander said dryly.  "Willow had to."

John blinked then looked at his boys.  "We weren't anywhere near that," Sam told him.  "That was Sunnydale, Dad.  That's why everyone else is in Cleveland."

He shook his head quickly but told them a tamer story about hunting down a werewolf that was eating cows.  Xander butted in to talk about sedating them if they usually locked themselves up, but that was a difference of opinion.  He didn't know any that locked themselves up.  The kids cheered at the end and begged for another one.  Tara told them one about hunting something that had gone on up at the college.  Joyce shared stories about her daughter's hunts that she had been told.  It was good for the kids to hear from them.  Grandparents helped when you had really bright, slightly evil children to raise.

***

Xander looked at Dean when he came back around midnight.  "Go okay?"

"Lots and lots of zombies," he said, flopping down.  Xander grimaced.  "But she handled it well."

"Thank you.  I helped train her since she hadn't been found before.  She had almost no hand-to-hand when she got activated."

"Welcome."  He looked around.  "Sleepovers are allowed when they're grounded?"

"Dawn got called in for a major car accident that got all the other interns summoned.  Sam's knocked out."  Dean quirked up an eyebrow.  "Slight vision about a demon going around to attack cemeteries.  Easily taken care of."

"Good to know.  When do you want to get it?"

"Tomorrow night good?  I can handle it but that'll mean someone will have to watch my holy terrors since she's on."

"I can do that," Dean promised.  "Any luck breaking up the unholy alliance?"

"Nope," Xander said dryly.  "Unfortunately."  He shifted, putting his feet up.  "Bobby's in bed with Caleb and Sauda.  She climbed in earlier to protect him."

"Bobby or Caleb?"

"Caleb."  Xander gave him an odd look.  "How did we talk to your dad earlier when she's in bed?"

"I was wondering that.  I'm thinking there was some time blinking since he looked really old and he wasn't when he died."

"Ah."  He nodded.  "Good to know."   He shifted again.  "Missy's in Bri's closet on her sleeping bag.  She said she was grounded and sleeping next to her best friend wasn't going to be allowed so she was going to be good so you wouldn't have to spank her.  A direct quote."

Dean grinned.  "I love my little hellion."  He stood up.  "Let me gather them."  Xander nodded, going to help him.  He grabbed Missy gently and carried her off while Xander got Bobby.  They were put back into bed by Dean, who tucked them in.  Then Xander went home so he could sleep.  Dean hit his own bed.  It was a school day tomorrow so they had to get up early.

***

Sam opened his door the next morning and nearly tripped over the cat who was staring at him.  "What?" he asked, still a bit cranky.  "Did they do it again?"  He went to check.  No makeup this morning.  That was nice.  He picked up the cat to stare at her.  "We're not witches, cat.  Be a familiar for someone else."  He put her back outside and went to start breakfast.  "Food!" he called ten minutes later.  The rest of the family got up and trudged in to eat with him.   "The hunt?" Sam asked Dean once he had some coffee.

"Zombies."

"Eww."

"Demon in the cemetery?"

"Easy.  Killed by fire."

Dean nodded.  "Cool, we'll get it later.  Xander said he didn't need backup."

Sam snorted.  "He's not Superman.  No matter how often he tries to prove it."  He took another drink of his coffee.  "How did we see Dad?  I didn't even think about that before I started the summoning."

"No clue.  He asked the same thing," Dean admitted.  He noticed Bobby staring.  "Later discussion, kiddo.  Eat.  School in a few."  Bobby inhaled his breakfast and went to get dressed.  Missy finished and went to do the same with the usual morning fight with her hair.  She finally gave up and presented her father with her brush and two matching ponytail holders.  He fixed it for her, making her a happier girl again.  Then they all piled into the Impala to go to school.  The daddies came home to get another hour of sleep before work.  It had been a long night for them.

***

Xander looked up at the kids trooping in.  "We're got good news.  Adanne is now out of a booster seat.  So more room back there."

"That's no fair," Paka pouted, arms crossed over her chest.  "Why doesn't she have to sit in one?"

"The state says she's big enough to not need it," he said with a grin.

"When will we be big enough?" Amanda asked.  "I feel like a baby in a car seat."

"You have to be over so many pounds or of a certain height."  He stood Adanne against the wall, marking it.  "When you're that tall, you guys can get out of your booster seats."

They all tried themselves against the mark but had to pout.  "We need a growth spurt soon," Amanda told him.

"They'll come.  They always do."  She sighed but went to do her homework.  Xander grinned at Adanne.  "What do we want for dinner?"

"I don't care.  As long as it's not beans.  It's all good, Daddy."  She gave him a hug and went to get her homework from Paka.  They were in the same class.  "Did anything happen today?"

"Not really.  The teacher was amused that you had a doctor's appointment."  She shrugged and handed over the assignment sheet.  "That's due Friday.  The other stuff is due on their days."  They got to work on their homework.  Second grade was hard!

Dean strolled in.  "Are we marking their heights now?" he asked, seeing the dark mark on the wall.

"That's the height they have to be to get out of their booster seats.  Adanne made it today."

"Missy and Bobby have a few more growth spurts before then.  Unfortunately.  The Impala looks strange with baby seats in the back."

Xander grinned.  "It can, yeah."  He got back to work on dinner.  It finally went into the oven and he went to change clothes.  "Guys, I've got to hunt tonight.  Dean's feeding you guys."

"I can go," Dean offered.  "Let Sammy feed 'em."

"That would give the kids time together to plot more things."

Dean smirked.  "They can do that at school.  They did last time."

"Good point."  He shrugged.  "If you really want to, you can.  As long as Sam agrees."

Dean called over there.  "Let us feed the horde then go do that demon.  Can you evil thing sit?"  He smirked.  "Thanks, Sammy."  He hung up.  "He said that's fine.  He was nuking frozen stuff for ours."

Xander smirked, pulling the food out to start plating it up.  "Eat or starve," he called.  His kids ran out to dig in.  When they were done he looked them over.  "We've got to get a demon.  You guys are being babysat by Sam.  Behave tonight or else."  They all sighed but nodded.  "If we're good, I'll let you guys earn back enough time to go to the Namibian heritage thing this weekend."  They cheered, going to get their homework so they could troop that way.  Sam liked helping them with homework.

Paka stopped next to Xander to hug him.  "Be safe.  You're not a slayer."  She gave Dean the same hug and advice.  "Do you think Sam can help us with a paper on our family's histories?"

Xander shrugged.  "Probably but you know as much as I do, Paka."

"The teacher said that's not good enough."

"Your teacher and I can talk tomorrow."  She nodded, smiling before skipping off to get Sam's help.  He looked at Dean.  "You sure you want to help?"

"Better safe than a trip to the ER, dude."  Xander nodded, following him out to the Impala.  The cat got to be tossed off her again and they left.  "Damn cat," Dean muttered as he backed into the driveway.  Xander just laughed.  The Winchester vs. Cat battles were cute to watch.

***

Xander tapped on the teacher's door the next morning.  "Do you have a few?"

"Of course.  Which student is yours, sir?"

"Adanne and Paka."  The teacher looked shocked.  "Yes, I adopted them," he said dryly.

"Oh, I see.  I know that's fashionable."

"I adopted them as infants, long before it was fashionable, lady.  That's not why I adopted those three little holy terrors."  He walked in and looked at her.  "You're upsetting my girls by not accepting that they know about their native heritage but not their actual families.  Mostly because their families were dead when I adopted them as infants."  She gave him a horrified look.  "Halla's the only one of those three that have a living parent and her native tribal enclave is having a bit of a civil war problem going on around them."

"I didn't know that."

"Yet, Paka said she told you," he said dryly.

She cleared her throat.  "They don't know their natural parents?"

"The other two's mothers died.  One died after I got to their village to help them.  The other right before I got there to help.  Which is why their people had me adopt the girls."

"They had....why would they have you adopt them?"

"Because their shaman saw something special in them and knew I could give them a good life, with survival training, so they could do impressive things with their futures."  He smirked.  "I was over there for work reasons.  I got caught up in the fights around their villages and a few others too."

"I see."  She looked at him.  "It's most unusual."

"You can't tell me half of the kids in your class know more than their grandparents exist, lady.  The sort of kids you have in here don't go beyond 'mommy's shallow and grandma doesn't like it' most of the time.  My girls are real informative when asked.  All kids are."  He smirked a bit.  "They're natural parrots."

She cleared her throat again.  "I can see letting them talk more about their natural village.  It was meant as an exercise to let them do a class presentation on a subject that they knew fairly well so they wouldn't be as nervous.  They need to learn how to give oral reports."

"My girls can already do oral book reports."

"I've noticed your girls seem to be voracious readers."

"I used to own a bookstore.  Some of those went to the kindergarten class with the younger set."

"You have more than the two?"

"Yeah, I have eight."  She whimpered.  "They're good kids.  We handle it.  Some mornings it's a madhouse but most of the time it's all right.  But I won't have you dissing my girls for being adopted.  I'm sure they're not the only ones."

"I can let them do it on their adopted family if they want."

Xander shrugged.  "Take that up with them.  Paka was worried that she couldn't do this assignment last night."

"I can talk to both girls later about that.  I know another girl is adopted as well, Mr. Harris."  He nodded at that.  "Thank you for bringing this to my attention.  Have you realized that Paka tends to .... get a bit dirty?"

"Actually, Adanne is our gardener.  Paka's been helping Missy and Bri recently with their evil plans to set me up with someone."

"She's come in a bit dirty."

Xander stared at her.  "She takes a bath every morning."

"She's...."

"Biracial," Xander told her.  "That's probably her natural color with a tan.  She tends toward lion colored skin when she tans."

"Ah, that may be it," she said, letting him dodge that one.  "Should I be delicate about any other issues?  Like them being on scholarship?"

"They're not."

"Really?  How do you afford the tuition with eight children?"

Xander smirked.  "I work for a living, the same as you do.  Only I work in a higher paid job than most teachers do.  I work for a research council."

"Oh, I see."

"I'm the second-in-command."

"That explains a lot about your girls.  Are you sure you want to keep them in that martial arts club?"

"Yes.  I want my girls able to protect themselves if something should try to grab them.  It has happened in the past and I did teach my girls some before they went there.  He's more used to teaching younger students than I was.  I'm used to working on self-defense with teenagers.  Them and my coworkers' children are doing quite well in there."

"I suppose that's a good idea but Miami's a fairly safe city."

"It's still a city that has over a hundred pedophiles registered and my girls would be a target if they try to go after the people I work for.  We're the only office with children.  That's why I want my kids to be protected.  Even if there wasn't a work-related danger, rarely, I'd want them able to protect themselves and others from those shitheads who like to hurt little kids."

"I can definitely see that point," she decided.  "Thank you for not being confrontational."

"I won't be unless you are."

She nodded.  "Are the girls going to the embassy event this weekend?"

"They're presently grounded for being brats but if they're good they can all go.  I might even help cook."

She nodded.  "That's very interesting."

"The things you learn when you're in Africa for nearly a year," he said dryly.  "Thank you.  The girls are out there playing right now."  He walked off, finding the principal yelling at Halla.  "What did you do?" he asked dryly.

"Nothing," she said with a pout.

He looked at the principal.  "What happened?"

"A young boy picked on her so she shoved him."

"He had a knife!"

"He doesn't have one on him," she said impatiently.

Xander looked at the little boy.  "Where is it?"  The boy glared.  He stared back, staring him down until he burst out crying and pulled it out of his sock to toss at his feet.  The kid's mother gave him a horrified look.  He looked at her.  "I have eight.  Two of them are boys."

"Oh, dear."

"Now and then my girls like to make evil plans."  He grinned at his daughter.  "What did I tell you about bullies?"

"Turn them in," she said with a pout.  "They didn't believe me, Daddy."

He patted her on the head, looking at the principal, who was staring at the boy.  "Is she in trouble for shoving him?  I know it breaks the no-violence rules."

"No," the mother said.  "My son is in trouble however.  How did you get your father's knife?" she asked her son.

"She's bad and wrong!" he shouted, pointing at the girl.  "She's a freak."

Xander cleared his throat.  "Technically, all humans are freaks because none of us are the same.  If we were, things would be very boring, wouldn't it?"

"My daddy said people like her should be put down before they muddy things."

The principal held up a hand.  "That is enough.  I will not allow racial bias in this school."  She looked at Xander.  "You know that."

"I've ran into it before," he promised with a small smile.  "It happens.  There's unopened minds everywhere.  Fortunately in the minority."   She smiled.  "Is Halla in trouble?"

"No.  Halla, please go to your classroom.  We'll talk later."

Xander looked at her.  "You okay?  Shaky or anything?"

"No, Daddy.  I only shoved him because there were a few other kids with me.  I didn't want him to hurt them.  So I put him down like the martial arts teacher said."

He nodded.  "Next time, scream for a teacher," he said firmly.  "Let her take the weapon.  I do not want you or the others hurt.  They pay teachers to handle this stuff."

"Yes, Daddy."  He gave her a hug.  "I'm okay."

"You'd better be.  We'll talk after school?"  She smiled and ran off for her classroom.  "Let me know if we need to have another parent-teacher conference?"

"Did you?" the principal asked, looking tired.

"Family project and the oldest three are adopted."

"Ah, that one.  I can see the problem."

Xander nodded.  "We worked it out.  Let me know if we need more help.  Or if the Winchesters do.  I'm going to work if she has problems."

"That's fine.  I'll call Beth."

"New secretary, Etta.  Beth tried to sabotage the office a little bit."

"That's good to know," she said.  He grinned and walked off.

"It's nice he wasn't pushy.  I would've been screaming at the other parent," the mother admitted.

"He's very calm.  All his children are very well behaved, well read, and mannered.  We adore the children he has."  She walked them to the office, picking up the knife on the way.  They apparently had things to talk about.

***

Xander looked out when his secretary hit the button for him on the phone.  "I'm right here, Etta.  I'm ignoring the reports in favor of reading to the youngest three."  The woman out there huffed in.  "Social worker, huh?  Let me guess, the second grade teacher at my children's school turned me in for facing her down about not liking that my oldest three are adopted?"

"She thought it was odd a single man has eight children."

Xander pulled out the file he had on the children.  "This is their formal adoption papers, the papers leaving me the youngest three from one of my ex's when she died, and the birth certificate of my other two."

She looked it over.  "You keep this here?"

"I keep a copy here, one at home, and one in the car in case something happens.  I know very well some people are idiots who don't believe white boys like me can have kids who're black."

Sauda tugged on her wrist.  "Can he read to us while you do that?  He's halfway through the story."

"He can," she agreed.

"Thank you."  She smiled at her father.  "More Latin bunny rabbits?"

"Sure," he promised, going back to reading to them in Latin.  They were quickly learning it and it made them giggle when he made hopping motions with his hands to illustrate.

The social worker stared at him.  "You're reading to them in Latin?"

"Yes.  My oldest ones can speak and mostly read Latin, Swahili, and English.  I know a few others and they'll learn them as they get older."  He smiled.  "We're a research council.  We have a lot of books in Latin around here."  He went back to the story, making the boys grin again.  He finished and they clapped.  "Now, you three pick a book to work on so we can work on your reading."  They ran to do that.  He looked at her.  "Library's up the hall and my two coworkers are in there right now."

"They don't mind them bursting in there?"

"Their own children do the same when they want new reading materials."  He saw the book they were bringing back.  "That's above your reading level, kids."

"Uncle Sam said to hand you this so you could read the bookmarked page," Sauda said with a smile.  They ran back to get a new book.

Xander opened it to read the section he had marked with a post-it.  Then he grimaced.  That didn't look good.  He typed out an email to Giles' secretary.  It looked like someone was going to try to take out Buffy.  Then he closed the book again.  "Sorry, slight info leak that got noted."  He leaned on the book.  "What else did you need to see?"

"You have them listed as triplets but their birth dates vary some."

"I have no idea.  She said they were her triplets.  Her lawyer said they were her triplets when he signed over custody after her death.  I've been treating them like triplets since that's how they were raised.  I don't know.  I don't really care.  I know she didn't steal them or anything."

"It's highly unusual."

Xander shrugged.  "We're the Watchers Council.  We're used to unusual."

She froze, staring at him.  "You're like Prestons?"

"Without killing people, yes.  He killed a lot of people as we found out."

She swallowed.  "I met him socially over one of the local girls once."

"Carma's in Thailand with her mentor.  I'm the one who got her away from her mother and her mother's gang friends."

"That was nice work."

"Thank you."

"Are these your *children*?"

"Yes.  All of them.  The new council doesn't do things like the old one.  They were assholes.  We're not."

"That's good to know.  How is your housing done?"

"We've taken over the old head's property.  The main house had to be destroyed because it had walls with body parts.  My coworkers took one building, I took the larger one.  The kids share rooms but it's generally well set up for them to play and live in.  It's big enough for us and my adopted little sister.  She's a medical school student doing internship rotations."

"Babysitting?"

"If she can't, we three adults who work here take turns.  As you can see, the youngest three usually come to work with me.  We have two safe apartments upstairs for them to play and nap in.  I saw them get on the elevator so they headed up to one of them, probably to watch cartoons.  We stayed there until we found out the housing was good."

"That's reasonable I suppose."  She looked at the youngest three's papers again then at him.  "Cleveland?"

"That's where we were until something attacked.  Then I moved them to a safer location and took over this office since it was empty and we needed someone here."

"Again, reasonable," she decided.

"I'm a highly overprotective parent.  That's why all my kids know how to defend themselves.  The ones in school are going to the school's martial arts club.  The younger ones will be taught the same way.  Also gun safety, sword safety, crossbow safety, all that stuff."

"That's probably reasonable with your job."

Xander nodded.  "Sometimes," he agreed dryly, smiling some.  "I try very hard to keep them out of it."

"A good idea.  It was reported your daughter is a bit dirty some mornings?"

"I don't think it's dirt.  I think the teacher's not really used to biracial children who tan. Halla, the younger of the oldest three, turns about lion colored.  Paka, the one she was complaining about earlier, is too fashionable to ever be that dirty.  Adanne likes to garden so she might be now and then since the school has flowerbeds she can help weed before classes.  Beyond that, Paka does tan sometimes.  You're more than welcome to talk to the girls at the school.  I'll send one of my coworkers with you so they can't feel threatened.  The main office worked very closely with the social workers in Cleveland when new girls came in that needed help."

"It's good you don't get too huffy."

He smiled.  "I know you're doing your job.  I have no problem with those doing their jobs.  The ones who hunt out things because they're vindictive and want to ruin lives, I've got a real problem with."

"I'm not like that.  I have too much work as is."

"Most of you do," he agreed with a small smile.  "I can ask Sam to go with you if you'd like to talk to the girls or they're coming here after school if you'd prefer.  Either is fine with me.  I know Halla's had a bad day since another kid threatened her earlier.  She shoved him because he had a knife."

"Oh, dear.  It was handled?"

"As far as I know.  The principal handled it."

"Good."  She smiled.  "I don't think I should need to.  Can I check on that one?"

"Of course.  Want Sam to go with you?"

"Please."

He called the library.  "The social worker got told that some of the girls were dirty by their teacher.  Paka actually, Sam.  Can you take her to the school and sit with the kids?"  He smiled.  "Thank you.  I saw them hit the elevator and I know it's time for Smurfs.  Thanks."  He hung up.  "That's fine.  He can pick up the others at the same time."  Sam walked in so he dug out his van's keys.  "Here you go.  Thanks, Sam."

"Not a problem.  Our dad got called on a few times for being a single father too."  He smiled at the social worker, turning on the Winchester charm.  "All of the girls or specific girls?"

"Can I talk to all of them?"

"If you need to," Xander assured her.  "Do watch out, the ones in kindergarten are plotting evilly to get me together with Sam's brother.  They've finally been convinced locking us in a room together isn't marrying us."

She laughed.  "That's cute."

"Not to us," Xander said dryly but he was smiling some.  "But they reasoned it out very well.  I was impressed with that part."

"The kids like making evil plots and some of the girls like doing makeovers," Sam told her.  "Shall we?  School's nearly out for the day."

"We can do that."  She shook Xander's hand.  "Thank you for not making this a stand-off."

"If I thought you were a problem, I would have but you're clearly not one of those sort."  She nodded, leaving him with Sam for a moment.  "Just watch," he said quietly.  "She doesn't seem like the digging for revenge sort."  Sam nodded, following her down to the van.  Xander sent another email to Giles in case they needed to apply political pressure.  He hated it when adults got pissed because he had adopted.

***

Sam walked into the room with the girls.  The principal had them gathered for them.  He looked at his niece, who looked immaculate.  He looked at Bri, who looked immaculate but had a black eye.  He saw Amanda had a similar problem with a split lip added and was a bit messed up as well.  The others were looking calm and collected.  "The principal said there was a problem, ladies?"

Bri nodded.  "The one with the knife's brother tried to jump Halla earlier, Uncle Sam.  Pity."

Sam scowled.  "Why did we not turn him in?"

"We did shout but he took a swing so we had to defend ourselves," Adanne said quietly.  The social worker came in.  "We're very sorry but there was a problem earlier."

"I heard from the principal, girls.  She said you did what you could to hold him off."  She saw the bruises.  "Are you all right?  Need ice packs?"

"Daddy will fuss us to death," Amanda assured her with a smile.  "He caught me by accident trying to get Bri and Missy.  Uncle Sam, Bobby was with the nurse for the bloody nose that wouldn't stop."

"I saw him already.  Gave him a hug.  He's still there waiting on us since he's a bit dizzy.  We'll be heading home as soon as we're done here.  Can you guys talk to the social worker?"

Paka looked at her.  "Why did our teacher turn us in?  We were defending ourselves."

"It wasn't about that," Sam told her.

"It was reported that your father may not be able to handle all of you."

Adanne snorted.  "He handled us three just fine on a trek across Africa for work reasons.  Including potty training us."

"Manners," Sam reminded her gently.

"Sorry.  Daddy would be mad if I was less than mannerly, ma'am."

She smiled.  "That's all right.  Honesty is more important to me than manners, young lady.  You're which one?"

"Adanne.  I'm the oldest.  That's Halla, Paka, Briony, Amanda, and Missy is Uncle Sam's niece.  His son is in the nurse's office for his bloody nose."

"I heard.  That's fine."  She pulled a chair over, looking over Paka.  "It was thought that you've come in a bit messy some mornings."

She snorted, shaking her head, her lips pursed together.  "I had someone confuse being dark-skinned as being dirty in the past.  They were idiots, to be less than polite about it.  The same as the racist little brat that tried Halla earlier was."

"He doesn't know any better," Halla said.  "He said his daddy taught him that.  His mommy hadn't corrected it yet.  I'm sure she's working on that today while yelling at his daddy about being dumb."

"Hopefully she's spanking him for bringing a knife to school and threatening a younger student," Sam told her.

"Well, that too, but the social worker who worked with the girls in Cleveland didn't want to hear about those things, Uncle Sam."

"There's a reason for that but I do believe that bringing a weapon to school should require punishment from the parents as well as the school," the social worker told her.  "Did you often talk to them?"

"No but Daddy sometimes had to go rescue some of the girls from where they were so they talked now and then about the new girls," Adanne told her.  "Daddy ran a bookstore up there when he wasn't working with the other girls so she came there a lot to check on them and us.  She wasn't sure we wouldn't run into problems in the school system since we're multi-lingual."  She looked at Sam.  "Is that the word?"

"It is," he assured her with a smile.  "Very good usage, Adanne."

"Thank you."

"I heard your father reading to the youngest three in Latin earlier."  They all grinned at that and nodded.  "He did that for you as well?"  They all nodded, including Missy.  She had gotten a few of them.  "Do you read any other languages?"

"We all speak Swahili.  Most kids don't so if we need to communicate without the other kids knowing, we use it," Bri told her, looking serious.  "Sometimes we want to talk about things that don't concern them."

"Kids can be like the gossipy church ladies that came in to get romance novels from the old store," Amanda agreed.

"They can," the social worker agreed.  "What was the last book you read, Amanda?"

"Ummm..."  She got into her backpack to look at it, holding it up with a smile.  "I'm halfway through.  It's about horses."

She took it to look through.  "This should be something Adanne and Paka would be pushing themselves to read.  I'm impressed."  She handed it back with a smile.

"Daddy made us book nerds," Bri told her.  "The shopping aunties up there made sure we were fashionable ones though."

"You do look very cute."  Bri smiled.

"She does a good makeup job too," Sam said dryly, giving her a look.  Bri just smirked at him.

"It got Auntie Dawn to flirt better with you," Amanda assured him.  "Which was the point, Uncle Sam."

He rolled his eyes.  "Their latest evil plan."

"Their father said they do that now and then.   Most girls their age are plotting to get a new pet."

"There's a stray cat on the grounds that they've adopted," Sam told her.  "They don't need another pet."

Missy nodded. "It likes to lay on Daddy's car and he hates that.  The car's an heir.. .what's that word, Uncle Sam?"

"Heirloom.  It means it was passed down through the family," he said.

"That word," she said with a smile.  "And sometimes she likes to sneak in to check up on us.  Or lay on the coffee maker to make my daddy growl before he's had coffee."

Sam nodded.  "Me too."

"They're kind of grumpy then," Amanda assured her with a small smile.  "But they're nice once they've had coffee."

"Many adults are that way," the social worker agreed, looking at Sam.  "May I?"

"As long as you don't ask leading questions or something like that.  Let me go get Bobby.  Do we need to get anything?"

"Can we have popsicles on the way home?" Bri asked, wiggling some.  "We defeated the bully, we deserve a treat."

"I'll see if Xander will run out to pick some up so we can have them in the office."  He went to get his son, standing outside to listen to her.

"Girls, do any of you feel threatened by him?" she asked.

"He's calmed down very nicely since we gave him the makeover," Bri assured her.  "He was a bit mad then but he loves us.  Even if I do think he should use the eyeliner more often.  It made his eyes look very big.  Just like auntie's magazine said it would."

"Why did you read something like that?"

"Dawn was helping me rearrange my closets and had been reading it.  We took a break so she could answer a call from another student."  She shrugged.  "I was kind of grounded so I couldn't read one of my fun books.  That's not really one so it was a slippery way around the rules."

"You read a lot?"

"Daddy made us book nerds," Paka said dryly.  "He wanted us to be smarter than he was at our age.   It's mean when he grounds us away from our books."

"Do you girls watch tv now and then?"

"Daddy watches cartoons with us so he can point out the cool super heros and the lame ones," Adanne said with a smile.  "We don't want to miss Super Friends."

The social worker smiled slightly at that.  "That's the only one you watch?  Nothing after dinner?"

Bri grimaced.  "It's all nasty trash that has things we don't need to learn about yet.  Daddy even made the older girls quit watching soaps with Auntie Buffy.  He said it was giving us bad ideas."

"I can agree with that."

"But most of the nighttime stuff is a lot like that so we don't need to see that either."

"What about the show with the nanny?" she asked.

"Why would we need to see families that couldn't handle their kids?" Bri asked, looking confused.  "We're not like that.  Even if we get into trouble, we're not that bad."

"We do get time outs," Paka told her.  "Daddy likes us in time outs.  We get bored really fast in them too so we don't do it again."

"Do you watch the news?"

"We read the papers for that," Amanda said like it should be obvious.  "The local newslady is a bimbo like Uncle Dean would like.  Big breasts that she shows off all too often in tight shirts that are unbuttoned way too low.  We won't ever be girls like her."

"That's right, we won't be skanky hos like Daddy likes," Missy agreed with a smile.  "I'll be a good girl like Auntie Dawn."

"Where did you learn that phrase?"

"Uncle Sam used it about one of the waitresses Daddy hit on when I was three.  Daddy likes girls like that with big butts and sometimes roller skates.  That's why we want him to have Uncle Xander."  The other girls scowled at her.  "What?  Maybe she can help.  It would look good if he was married, right?" she asked her.  "The Law and Order we snuck last night when we got up in the middle of the night said so."

"There's some who would appreciate him being in a good relationship," she told them.  "But that should be his choice."

"Of course it should be," Missy said with a smile and a hand pat.  "Now, do we have any other concerns?"

"No, not really.  Adanne, you garden?"

She smiled and nodded.  "I'm going to start working on some of the plants around the house later this week.  It needs help.  No one took care of the poor things but the swamp creatures."

"That's probably a good hobby for a young girl."

Adanne smiled.  "That too."

"Do any of you feel like you're not like normal children?"

"Well, yes, but we're not stupid," Bri told her.  "We like to read.  Daddy taught us that.  We don't like to do stupid things like some of them do.  One of the girls in my class was helping her mommy pick out her next stepfather.  That's just dumb.  Some of them are more concerned about their nails than their grades.  That's really dumb.  I bet their parents don't give them bribes for good grades like ours does."

"What do you get?"

"Candy bars, small things like a trip to a play place restaurant.  If we bring home all A's, daddy gets us a small gift thingy to a toy store or a mall so we can get something we want," Halla told her.  "Last time I got a new dress because I thought it was pretty.  The teacher liked it too."

"I think that's a good bribe and it teaches you children responsible shopping at the same time."  She was impressed with how Mr. Harris was pushing education on his children.  "Do you think that you don't play as much as the other kids?"

Bri shrugged.  "Who wants to get dirty?  It'll mess up my clothes and nails."

"Besides, we play whenever we want to.  Daddy doesn't *make* us read except for homework and right before bed," Amanda told her.  "We could watch more tv but it's junky stuff.  We like to read."

Missy nodded.  "I didn't read as much as they did before we started to live with them.  Bobby and I read a lot more now.  Daddy said he was impressed how good I was getting."

"I'm proud that you're such a good reader as well," she told her.  "Some people would worry that you choose to read instead of play outside."

"We play whenever we want to play," Bri assured her.  "We have the whole estate to run around on.  Daddy lets us play whenever we want as long as our homework's done."  She shrugged.  "It's boring doing the same thing all the time."

"Do you have bicycles?"

"We had one," Bri admitted.  "But it got bent in the move.  We haven't talked to Daddy about getting a new one yet."

Missy smiled.  "We can do that if you think it'd be good."

"I'm a bit concerned that you're all so...mature, children.  That you're not getting enough time being children."

All the girls snorted.  "We know we're kids," Bri assured her dryly.  "Just because we read a lot doesn't mean we're not kids.  We play, talk with the other kids, all that stuff.  We just like reading more than the stupid things."

"Do you go over on sleepovers?"

Bri gave her a horrified look. "Invade someone else's house?  No!  Are you insane?  What parent would do that to their babies?  The kids would tell their parents everything and then the parents would probably fight about small stuff that wasn't really important."

"Like no ice cream," Halla agreed.  "Besides, a lot of the kids here aren't really... nice.   They don't like us because we're practical instead of being brats.  We have manners that we use.  We have brains that we use.  A lot of the kids are more concerned about how they look instead of what they're learning."

"Plus they didn't like our clothes," Missy added.  "I'm growing right now so things have to be looser.  They didn't like that and tried to pick on me.  So I ignored them like Daddy said because they're crap heads."

"Your daddy will complain that you swore," Paka told her.

"Daddy called them shallow little parent ghosts," she countered with a scowl.  "A lot of the parents don't like daddy since he drives the van, but how else is he supposed to get all of us somewhere?"

"Do you feel comfortable in this school?"

"We mostly like the teachers even if we don't like some of the other kids.  There's kids like that at all schools though.  We had some in Cleveland too," Paka said then shrugged.  "One picked on me for being African and not wearing African clothes up there.  Unfortunately she had a learning problem since she couldn't read very well and neither could her mother."

"Daddy wants us to do important things and that takes good teachers," Bri said in a huff.  "Even if the other kids can be mean, there's kids like that everywhere and we can ignore their bad minds.  They'll be the sort to do little things like work at Burger King when people like us and Auntie Dawn are too tired from real work and drive thru."

Sam walked in, looking at her.  "Working at Burger King is still work and important in many ways, girls.  Otherwise you'd have to cook all the time."

"I know but it's not the same as working in a bank.  Or even what she or Auntie Dawn does.  That's important and it helps people.  They make nasty hamburgers to feed people who're too tired to cook.  It's not the same."

"We'll go over that idea some other time," Sam told her.  "You're right, it's not the same, but in some ways it still helps people.  Or else we would've starved when we were younger."  The social worker looked at him.  "Our dad didn't always cook that great."  He looked at the son in his arms resting against his shoulder.  "Are we done?  I should get them home to get them ice packs."

"Are we in trouble?" Bri asked the social worker.

"No, dear.  You're not in trouble."   She stood up.  "Feel better soon, children."  They nodded, following Sam out to the van.  She waited until they were closed in.  "Do they get play time?"

"They choose to read instead of going out to play.  We made them go out last night when it was pretty and cooler.  They brought out books.  Xander really has turned even mine and my brother's kids into book nerds.  I wasn't this bad and I read hundreds of books a year at their age.  They seem to enjoy it though."  He shrugged.  "They can play if they want to.  We never stop them unless they're tearing up the living room by fighting."

"They have outdoor toys?"

"The girls have hula hoops and jump ropes.  They have balls to kick and throw around.  Xander put up a horseshoe set for them.  They went back to reading after a few rounds."  He shrugged.  "They like to read.  I don't consider that a bad thing."

"What about playing with other children?"

He stared for a moment.  "Have you noticed that some of the kids locally are rather shallow?"

She sighed but nodded.  "I have."

"Our kids aren't.  They may be fashionable.  They may do girly things with their nails, but they don't put up with kids who don't think.  They play at recess but none of the other kids have invited them over or been invited over from what I heard.  If the kids wanted to invite a friend over, all they'd have to do is ask.  They don't.  I think that's mostly because they find a lot of the local kids to be a bit...  I don't want to say dumber but they think books are evil.  The girls in kindergarten are reading above their age level.  When I came in to read to the class I had to explain the kiddy book I was reading and it was on their level.  It was meant for five and six-year-olds.  The kids acted like they had no idea what story time was for.  I think if they could find other kids like them, and I'm sure they will as they grow up, they'll want to have them over more often.  Because let's face it, the first day of school Xander had to come in to answer some questions so people wouldn't feel they offended the older girls by asking if they were African."

"That can happen sometimes.  Is that why they're going here?"

"They're obviously bright.  Schools like this would give them a better shot of not being bored in class.  I'd hate to see what sort of evil plans they'd come up with if they were bored in public school.  Plus we'd end up being grandparents way too soon."

"True."  She smiled.  "I'm not finding a fault, but I would wish that they showed more child-like impulses."

"We suggest but they're stubborn."

"Bikes to ride around on?"

"The kids haven't asked for one.  We would if they'd ask.  I offered Bobby a skateboard and he told me he wasn't that sort of boy."  He shrugged, looking clueless.  "If they don't want it, I can't force them to use one."

"Good point.  I see nothing wrong, just that they're a bit mature for their age."

"Then again, Xander did get the three oldest during his trek across Africa.  They've seen hardship and war.   The kids have things that they take for granted but they know it's better here than there and I'm sure they've told the younger ones stories about their home villages."

"Probably.  That could explain that."  She smiled.  "Tell him it's fine and I'll make a report that they're darling, smart children who could use some more socialization but they're not finding other children to their liking at the moment."  She walked off, getting in her car to go back to the office to make that report.

Sam got in to drive, heading for the houses.  He called Xander's cell.  "It's me.  Did you know they got into a fight at recess?"  He grimaced.  "They're good.  They're a bit too smart for their ages.  She was worried that they didn't like to play outdoors and things.  I told her they made that decision and never told us they wanted things like bikes.  Yeah, she said it's fine.  We're heading home for ice packs and things.  They want popsicles.  Thanks, man."  He hung up.  "He'll get some on the way home."  They cheered and he drove a bit faster.  Those black eyes really did need ice packs and Bobby clearly needed to lay down again since he was resting against a window because he was still dizzy.

***

Xander hung up.  "Etta, heading home right now," he called, gathering things.  "C'mon, kids.  Dean!"  He came out of his office. "Sam said the kids got into a fight at recess.  He mentioned ice packs and that they want popsicle comfort."

"C'mon," he agreed.  "Booster seat for the third kid?"

Xander grimaced but grabbed the spare he had in the closet.  "Always be prepared," he said dryly.  "It's Adanne's old one."  They got the kids and headed down to the Impala.  Dean got that seat in.  Xander got the other two buckled in while Dean handled Sauda.  Then they went home with a stop for some sugary goodness for their heathens.  They walked in and found Sam had them in the living room with ice packs.  Xander moaned.  "Girls."

"Faster healing, Daddy," Halla said with a smile.  "Bobby had a really bad nose bleed."

"He's still dizzy," Sam told Dean.

"That's fine.  Let me check."  He came over to check his nephew over.  "Did you swallow a lot?"  Bobby nodded.  "It's all right, sport.  It's not broken, just a bit swollen and sore.  Lay there all you want."  He checked the others.  Black eyes, split lip, the slayers had faster healing so theirs were already gone.  He looked at Missy.  "You weren't involved?"

"I was in the potty. The dumb one's big brother jumped them."

"I'm so going to kick his parent's ass," Xander said.

"The principal said they're not in trouble.  They did yell for help and tried to hold him off until the teacher could grab him," Sam told him.  "They had other kids near them but she said only ours got damaged."  Xander moaned, settling in to hug his girls.  "But they're not in trouble since they did call for help."

Xander nodded.  "Good.  Are the brats expelled?"

"Yes.  Both of them and their sister is bordering on crying she said.  She said the girl apologized to them later on."  Missy nodded that she had.  "She was panicking about it, Xander."

"Thankfully it seems like her mother taught her good sense."  He hugged his girls tighter.

"Daddy, I'd like to breathe," Bri complained.  "And eat a popsicle?"

Dean got them each one with a grin.  "Way to milk it, Bri."

She smiled.  "I deserve it.  He nearly landed in my lap and ruined my skirt.  Then Bobby's nose sprung a leak and it was nasty, Uncle Dean."

"The kid flailed and got Bobby with a foot as he ran over," Adanne told Sam.  "The social worker was very polite, Daddy.  She wanted us to play with the other kids more but we told her how dumb some of them could be now and then."

"She was worried they were a bit mature for their ages," Sam told him.  He heard a car and looked out.  "That's a crime lab hummer."  He went down to open the door.  "About the fight at school?"

"No.  Getting a final look through the files he left," Eric said as he slid out of the hummer and closed the door.  "Etta said to ask Xander where he put them."

"They're in the secondary filing cabinet at work.  Anything we found we boxed up separately."

"Thank you.  Fight at school?"

"Little racist bastard started it off this morning by picking on Halla.  Then his brother jumped the others at recess for getting his brother in trouble."

Eric grimaced.  "Some kids have bad parents."

Sam nodded.  "It's fine now.  Need us to come back?"

"I can do it tomorrow if you'll be in."

"Probably.  Xander might have a few of the older girls home for their black eyes."

"A lot of parents would," he agreed.

"If so, one of us will be in.  Sammy has some research he needs to get done.  I've got to track down something too so we'll probably be in the library."

"That's fine.  I'll pop around in the morning when I've got a few free minutes to grab his files."  He looked up then at him.  "They didn't probate his will and give this to whoever?"

"The Council owns it.  He sponged money off the old Council to buy it."  He shrugged.  "That makes it the same as the office so we can live here."

"I guess that makes sense.  Thank you for your help."

"Things like what he did suck," Dean said plainly.  Bobby came out to hug him.  "What's up?  Still feel nasty?"

"I think one of my adult teeth is loose.  Daddy wanted you to make sure."

Dean squatted down to look in his mouth.  "Which one?"  He wiggled it a bit.  "Don't do that or it'll fall out.  If you eat soft stuff and leave it alone it'll quit wiggling."  Bobby nodded, giving him a hug before Dean stood up and the boy went back inside.  "It's something to worry about," he said at the smile the other man was giving him.

"It's a good dad thing to do."  He grinned.  "I'll see one of you tomorrow morning."  He got back into the hummer and drove off.

Dean went back inside.  "He'll show up tomorrow for the rest of those files, Xander."

"That's fine.  I can work from home tomorrow."  Sam's phone beeped.  "Missed a call?"

"No, that's a new email beep," Dean told him.

Sam opened that program, getting into what he needed.  "Giles wants pictures in case it becomes necessary for something legal to happen."

"We can do that," Dean promised, going to get their camera to take those pictures.

***

Xander walked in the day after next, looking at the woman waiting for him.  "More problems?" he asked the social worker.

"The one your group worked with in Cleveland is presently in a hospital?"

He shrugged.  "I've been down here since before our new building got blown up by the last major problem.  If so, I'll send her a card.  I liked working with her when we needed to."  He opened the office door, finding someone going through his desk.  "Etta, any idea who this person is?"

"He's a watcher from Germany, Xander.  He needs someone's files."

He looked back at her.  "We don't keep them in my desk, Etta.  Excuse me for a moment," he said, giving the social worker a nudge so he could close them in the office.  "What do you want and why are you in my desk?"

"I need the local slayers' files.  Who're you?"

"Xander.  Head of the Miami branch and Giles' second."  He crossed his arms over his chest.  "We don't have any full slayers here in Miami.  We have some that are too young and one that's not trained but is over the calling age.  What did you need them for?"

"Because we need them.  Who're you to interrupt?" he demanded.

"Maybe you didn't hear my introduction.  I'm second-in-command, you little bitch.  Now, get out of my desk."

"You can't stop them from their callings!" he said firmly, advancing on him.  He sneered when Xander shifted.  So Xander kindly slapped his smile off his face and made the man howl in pain a moment later.

"They're too young to be on field duty," he said, staring down at him.  "That's why we made the mandatory age law.  Because we have so many right now.  We don't need little kids in the field."  Someone knocked.  "Not now," he snarled.  "Give me a few to correct this one's assumptions."  He looked down again.  "I sincerely doubt you need a seven-year-old slayer's files for any good reason."  He kicked him in the chest, making him wheeze.  "If you've got a statement to give, I'd do so now."

"You can't keep them from the field."

"I'm not, I'm training them so they can go when it's their time and last for a really long time.  Like Buffy has.  Anything else?"

"The Powers said there's too many," he said after the next kick.  "They have to go into the field.  It's natural selection."

He opened the door.  "Dean, good.  Go get the girls, put them in protective custody.  Etta, get Horatio or Eric, someone who knows us, down here to arrest this ass for trying to sacrifice the younger slayers."

She was dialing.  "Mr. Giles might not like that, Xander."

"I'll tell him myself so they can bail them out and give them a proper tribunal.  Dean, please?"  He nodded, heading to do that.  He looked down at the man, a cold look that had sent a few vampires running in the past.  "No one touches my kids.  Even when they're in the field they'll have backup from me and their siblings."

"The Powers won't be let it happen!" he shouted.  "It's not allowed!"

"The last time I knew you weren't a Power," Xander said dryly.  "Until you are, shut the fuck up until you're in jail.  Then you can wail and plead and beg all about your precious theory."

"They ordered through the seers."

"Really?  Because I am a seer.  I have another one here on staff.  Neither of us got it.  Plus I might get a head's up since I used to date Cordelia Chase.  She's their present messenger.  You'd think they'd tell her to announce it, huh?"

Cordelia faded in checking her nails.  "Wasn't us.  They want your girls to be strong for the next wave of major issues, Xander."  She looked at him, seeing the sneer.  "Hi, Messenger for the Powers That Be."  He went pale, trying to move.  Xander kicked him again then stood on his sore ribs.  "Thank you.  Saves my shoes.  Can't really shop for new ones on this side you know."  She moved closer.  "Now then,  you and the other six watchers wanted to do what with the sacrifices of innocent, young slayer blood?"

"We will win," he sneered.

"Etta, please set out an alert to all watchers, this one has six friends who want to sacrifice underage slayers."  She nodded, sending that out immediately.  He looked down.  "I hope they have fun with you in prison for wanting to kill children."

"Sir, Giles said not to have him arrested."

"It's that or he sits in a closet," Xander said dryly.  "I think he'd hate that more."  He summoned his phone over, making Cordelia smirk.  "Of course I learned since Willow's shit on the cliff awakened it.  I don't want to follow her example.  Thankfully this is all I can do."  He called up there.  "Giles, me.  There's him and six others.  Yes, I'm having him arrested until you can stop the others and get a tribunal together.  That way he can't alert them.  No, I walked in and found him going through my desk."

"He was here when I got here, Xander," Etta told him.  "He said he needed the local slayers' files and asked me if I knew where they were.  I said no, I hadn't been here that long.  I didn't think he'd go through your desk."

"Chill, Etta.  I know you're not one of them.  The kids like you too much.  Adanne would've sensed you were evil and kicked your butt by now if you were."  He looked down.   "I am.  They can keep him from talking to his cohorts too."  He smirked evilly.  "He admitted to six when Cordelia said so.  Thank you."  He hung up.  "Giles sends his love, Cordy."

She smirked.  "You're a flaming asshole today, Xander."

"Someone threatened my kids.  There's no way in hell they're going to get away with that."

"I'll warn Dawn."

"I already called her," Sam called.  He and Dean walked in with all the kids.  "The principal said this is highly unusual but I told her about the death threat to the three oldest girls.  She'll send their homework wherever we need them."  He looked down then at his friend.  "Good job not killing him yet," he offered with a grin.

Xander smirked.  "Torture is so much more fun and I learned a lot from the women I used to date.  Even that one," he said with a point at Cordy.

"I did teach you how to snark better," she admitted dryly.  She looked down.  "Oh, do try," she offered.

Xander looked at him.  "Want to go to jail missing body parts?  I can do that."  He summoned a sword over.  The man whimpered, trying to move again.  "I'll be damned if you come near my kids to sacrifice them.  Kids, library.  Keep one of the adults with you.  This one wants to spill slayer blood."

Paka looked at him then at her father.  "He doesn't look like a demon or he's that stupid."  The guy reached for her.  She kicked him in the face, breaking his nose.  "Don't touch.  Skeezy guys who touch kids deserve what they get before they're arrested and Auntie Dawn's books that we're not supposed to read said that they get it when they're in jail too."

He looked at her.  "No more reading Dawn's smut, Paka.  Any of you.  No soaps, no smut, nothing that Dawn would get adult joy from.  You know better.  Grounded."

"We're already grounded."

"Then have Sam go find you a book in the classical literature section."

"That's mean," Sam complained.  "They're dry and boring."

"Good!"  Paka pouted but Sam went to do that for her.  He looked down with an evil smirk.  "At least she didn't bite you.  She did me all the time after I first adopted her."

"Some girls like the taste of blood," Cordy agreed.  "They'll make wonderful goth slayers, Xander."  She smirked at the guy on the floor.  Then at the elevator.  "Lieutenant."

"You would be?"

"Cordelia Chase, Messenger for the Powers."

He nodded at that.  "The problem we're having is related?"

"He claimed the bosses sent him to sacrifice young slayers.  They didn't."

"I see."  He looked down at the moaning man.  "May we have him, Xander?"

Xander kicked him hard on the side, making him scream in pain.  "Sure.  There's six others doing the same thing according to Cordy."  He looked at him.  "I've got three of the youngest slayers here with me," he said quietly.  "The others are in Barcelona and England."

"I got hold of Cera," Etta told him.  "Not her watcher or the regional head.  She said she'd protect them, Xander.  Barcelona didn't respond."

"Call Philippe directly."  She nodded, doing that.  "I know he's not involved.  He's a seer too."  He let the  nice officers take the guy.  "Found him going through my desk to find out which kids are the slayers.  If he couldn't read well enough, he probably would've sacrificed them all."

"You got them from demons," the watcher sneered.

Xander stared at him.  "No, my ex made a wish before she died.  Left it with her boss.  He let it happen because he thought it'd give me hell for annoying him when I was dating Anyanka."  The man struggled.  "Let me hit you again," he offered.  The officers walked him off, still struggling.  He looked at Cordelia.  "Do I need a bigger car?"

"Not until you're a grandfather."  She smirked then faded out.  "Have fun with that, Xander."

"If I have to hunt down each one, so be it," he called after her.  He looked at Horatio.  "Thank you."

"You're welcome.  Just the girls are in danger?"

"No clue.  Probably."

"I'll make sure he's incommunicado then."  He nodded at the social worker.  "Problems?"

"There's some inconsistencies in the paperwork from Cleveland on his three youngest."

Xander looked up.  "D'Hoffryn?"  His second-in-command appeared.  "D'Hoffryn's right hand, this is a social worker here about my youngest three your boss gave me."

He smirked and took her with him to see the boss.

Xander looked at Horatio.  "She'll be fine."  He looked at Etta.  "Who else didn't answer?"

"Egypt but they're on a hunt today.  Something about creatures in a tomb."

"I saw one of those.  I needed artillery and I told him that.  Anyone else?"  She shook her head.  "Anyone respond in a manner that made you worry?"

"Thailand's head."

"Carma's there with Carolyn.  She'll kick his ass if he tries her."  She nodded at that.  "I trained Carma.  She'll kick his ass."  He looked at Horatio.  "Thank you."

"It's not a problem, Mr. Harris.  Those other files?"  He led him to the closet, letting him take the boxes.  "Thank you."

"Welcome.  People like them and Prestons deserve their spot under the jail being tortured by the other inmates.  Feel free to tell them that he wanted to sacrifice kids."

"It usually gets found out even if we don't say it."  He walked off with the stack of boxes.  Eric took them from his hummer back at the office.  "That one man is still in booking?"

"Frank was talking to him about what he wanted in case Calleigh's in danger."  He looked at him.  "Do we think she is?"

"I think if he could, Mr. Harris will protect her like his girls.   She might fuss, but oh well."  He walked inside, finding her watching.  "Did he try for you as well?"

"No.  Not yet.  He knows there is one but not who."

"If so, you can help Mr. Harris guard his children, Calleigh.  That way he's got official backup and nothing can come for you that you can't handle.  We'd be backing you both up."  He walked off, leaving her to glare at the man through the glass.  Someone really needed to handle some of the former Council.  The social worker appeared in the lab while they were going over the files.  "Are you all right?"

"Quite, thank you, Lieutenant.  That...being was very nice when he explained why Mr. Harris has children."  She blinked a few times.  "He was very proper as well.  Offered me tea and cookies."  She walked off to go back to her office.  She had to cab there, but that was fine.  Her car was safely in the watchers' parking garage.

***

Xander looked at the girls after talking with Dean and Sam to calm himself down.  "Girls, family meeting."  They moved closer, staring at him.  "Some of the old line watchers want to hurt the three slayers.  We're not sure what reason they're using.  I want all of you to be alert when we're not at home and not here in the office.  Got it?"  They all nodded.  "Good."  He smiled.  "It should be stopped very shortly.  Giles is working on it with Cera and a few others.  Whatever their puny minded reason, they won't be continuing.  So just be careful without being too paranoid."

Paka raised a hand.  "What about the Winchesters?"

"They should be fine.  Though I'm not sure if they can tell you girls from the others in the family.  Dean and Sam are already working on safety measures."  They all nodded at that.  "So be extra careful.  Like you would if we're at the mall."  They all smiled.  "Thank you.  Go back to homework for now.  We'll figure the rest out in a few hours."

"Lunch?" Halla asked.  "I'm getting hungry, Daddy."

"I'll have someone pick up something."  He smiled, giving her a hug.  "It'll be all right."  He went back to the office.  "Dean, can you do lunch?"

"Yup, was figuring I'd do that anyway.  Fast food or grocery store?"

"I hate to say it, but I'm too paranoid about them," he admitted.  Dean nodded, heading for the grocery store.  Xander looked at Etta.  He wrote down a number.  "Have one of them come talk to me sometime before tonight."  She nodded, making that call.  She gave him a horrified look when she found out what she was talking to.  "It's safer."  He went back to his office.  The guy had been going through the wrong files.  They'd figure it out soon and stomp them.  Or else Xander would let Buffy come down to babysit while he went hunting with Cera and Carma.  Then there wouldn't be any more problem watchers.

***

Xander walked outside after dinner that night, dish towel over his shoulder.  "Heard you but I had to get the roasting pan to soak.  We had lamb."  He looked at him.  "You know who I am?"

The demon nodded.  "We do.  We find it highly amusing you were sent to this office."

"I had this or Houston as a choice."

"That makes more sense."  He looked around then at him.  "The other two hunters?"

"Dean and Sam.  They work with me."

"Ah."  He nodded at that.  "What problem is this important?"

"Some watchers had the bright idea to come after my children to sacrifice the slayers."

"So you're warning us you'll be destroying Miami if they come back?"

"If they come back, the police can clean up the next one.  The lab's got very strong stomachs.  They cleaned up what Prestons did."  He smirked.  "If I have to, as an emergency evacuation plan, I'm sending them down to Gregori with Dean and Sam if possible.  I'll show Sam and Dean where the bar is.  Please give them passage and help them out of the city?"

"We can do that," he agreed.  "That's not a big favor."

Xander smiled.  "Thank you.  I hope the local community will stay peaceful?"

"We tend to take care of our own.  Worry more about the commune that's on a hidden Key down toward the hellmouth."

"We heard."  He smirked.  "They're under watch too."

"Excellent."

"Let me know if we can help.  Dean and Sam are hunters, and so am I."

"Agreed.  The girls are very cute."

"They try really hard," he agreed.  "But now and then they turn a bit evil too."  The demon walked off laughing.  Xander turned and found Dean and Sam behind him.  "One of the local demons who's big in the community."

"Gregori?" Sam asked.

"Owner of a demon bar.  He's a vamp that was in Sunnydale.  I played kitten poker with him a few times."  He grinned.  "He won't hurt the kids.  He sent a nice card when he found out I had spawned, as he put it.  He'll let you break your path and then escape from there."

"That could be helpful," Dean agreed.  "Will we have problems with that commune he mentioned?"

"If so, we're hunters," he said bluntly.  "We shouldn't but they're awfully near the hellmouth so I don't doubt we'll have a few here and there.  Usually Miami's handles itself.  Or we would've heard about it a long time ago."

Dean nodded.  "Makes sense.  That's why you picked Miami, wasn't it?"

"That and Houston's nearly dead.  I'd be bored within days with nothing to do."  He smirked, walking around them.  "There's some leftovers if you guys want it.  I made lamb."

"No thanks.  Missy wanted something she could identify as a cow," Dean said dryly.

Sam smirked at him.  "She's getting your smart mouth, Dean."

"Well, yeah, but she's my little clone."

"Wouldn't that mean you started out female?" Sam teased.

"Shut up, Sammy."  They walked back to the house.  The kids were arguing over a book.  Dean turned on the tv to something mentally warping, then stuck them both in front of it, taking the book from them.  "Watch tv.  It's bad for you."

"Daddy, this is like a soap," Missy called a few minutes later.  "People are kissing and it's gross!"

Sam changed the channel to a Law and Order spin-off on the upper cable channels.  "There, watch police drama."  He sat down to watch with them.  He agreed, their kids were strange since they spent so much time reading these days.  Even he had watched more tv than these two.  Dean came out to look, then smirked at him.  "It was that or MTV."

"Then she might want to dress like a rap video ho."

"Winchesters never had round butts that way," Sam shot back with a smirk.  "She'd never make it as a rap video girl, Dean.  They all need booty."

"Like skanky hos?" Bobby asked him.

"Yup, a lot like that," Dean agreed, walking into the kitchen shaking his head.

"We still consider you and Uncle Xander together even if you're not married," Missy called after him.  "That way I don't have to turn into a skanky ho like the girls you date, Daddy.  They'd be bad role models."

Sam burst out cackling at that.  "They would," he agreed dryly.

Dean glared from the kitchen.  "Shut up, Missy."

"Yes, Daddy.  Will you teach me to roller skate?"

"Hell no."  He went back to the dishes.  It had to be the reading that had warped their kids.  They'd have to warp Xander's back to make them more normal too.

Sam flipped to MTV.  Clearly they were on the same wavelength.  "Ooh, do you think I'll have big titties like her, Uncle Sam?"

Sam looked then shook his head.  "Probably not since hers are fake, Missy.  I don't think real people come that big."

"Do I have to date a girl that could squeeze me to death with her breasts, Daddy?" Bobby asked.

Sam looked at him.  "Just date someone nice, Bobby.  Ignore what they look like in favor of their personality and little quirks.  That's how I got Jess."  His son hugged him and went back to watching the video girls dance.

Missy tipped her head to the side.  "Huh, not all skanky hos have roller skates after all.  That one's got a skateboard."

Dean came out to look then at her.  "She's only acting like it so she gets paid."

"Does that mean she's a hooker like the one in Omaha that you told me to quit asking questions to because I thought she was cold?"

"More like an actress than that," Sam told her.

"Oh.  Am I going to be built like that?  If so, I've got to start thinking about what sort of shirts will look better than hers does on her."

"They're fake too," Sam assured her.  "When you're sixteen we can talk about this again."  She sighed but nodded, going back to watching the videos.  The next one didn't have sleazy girls so Dean went back to doing dishes.  He'd have to make sure Bri taught Missy what good shirts looked like when they were older.  That's when he realized he was planning on his kid and niece knowing Xander's kids for decades.  He looked in the kitchen, catching Dean's eye.  "Bri and she will have to talk about how not to look trashy when they're older."

"Mom wasn't built like that," Dean told him with a small grin.  He caught the inference.  He finished up and came out to change it to MTV Classic.  That had better music and less rap music.

Bobby leaned against his arm.  "Can we read to the nice music, Uncle Dean?"

"Less reading, more mind rotting tonight," Sam told him with a grin.  "That way we don't have to worry about you turning into a librarian."

"There's been ghosts in libraries so we could be hunting librarians," Missy offered with a bright, happy grin.  "The other hunters could come to us for information and everything, Uncle Sam.  I like that idea."  She gave his leg a hug and went back to humming along with the song.

Bobby grinned.  "I can see that."

Dean looked at Sam.  "Bikes?"

"We can buy bikes, yeah," he decided.  "Tonight?"

"Wal-Mart's open," he decided, getting up.  "C'mon, guys."  They groaned but followed along.  Two very nice bikes, and a snuck in book by Bobby, and they were back at the house.  Dean found the book and looked at his nephew.  "Did we shoplift?" he asked with a grin.

"We don't have that one?" he offered sheepishly.  "You didn't want to buy more books tonight."

Dean patted him on the head.  "You can only shoplift important things when you're hunting, Bobby.  Not everyday things.  Besides, that's what libraries are for."

"You won't let us go.  You said we might fill the trunk with books," Missy reminded him.  She was helping Sam put together her bike.  Hers was purple.  Bobby's was black.  She was going to steal his sometime soon because she looked better in black and he looked good enough in purple.  "Why is his built that way instead of like mine?" she asked him.

"Because boys get that crossbar higher to hurt us when we fall off," Dean quipped.  Bobby whimpered.  "You'll do fine, nephew."

"Can I have her bike?"

"Ride yours first then you can switch off," Dean said patiently.  He got Bobby's bike done first and helped him on it, adjusting the seat height.  Then he walked him around.  "I taught you how to ride with training wheels, now you have good balance so you don't need 'em anymore."

Bobby wobbled some but he got the hang of it pretty quickly.  He grinned at his dad.

Missy watched him.  Her bike was ready and she got on, letting her daddy adjust her seat height.  She was riding faster than her cousin.  The daddies went to get them a drink and they changed off.  It made more sense that a girl's bike had the higher crossbar since boys had things that hurt when you banged into them down there.  They were drifting around the driveway easily by the time the daddies came back out.

Dean looked then looked at Sam.  "My girl's so butch sometimes," he joked.

"Clearly.  Think we should get her camo clothes?" he teased back.

"She might like that as long as it's fashionable looking."  He walked over to give them water, then watched them ride for a bit longer.  Somehow Bobby's stolen book ended up with him and he was reading while he rode.  Dean poked Sam, pointing with a smirk.  "Son of Nerd there, Sammy.  Genes do tell apparently."

Sam went to get the book from his son.  "Ride, don't ride and read, son.  You can't do both at the same time.  You'll fall."  He gave him a hug then let him go back to riding around.  He saw the cat come trotting over and stop to stare at the kids.  "Watch your tail, cat."  He sat down, handing Dean the book.

The cat meowed at Bobby, chasing after him.  The boy smiled and sped up some.  So did the cat.  Then she leapt, making it onto his back.  "Ow!" he yelped.  "Claws!"

Sam came over to untangle the cat, glaring at her.  "Don't hurt the kids.  You'll become a pair of slippers."  He put it on Xander's doorstep then walked back shaking his head.  Dean had checked Bobby's back and he was back to chasing after his cousin.  Who had somehow stolen the book from her father and was trying to read and ride at the same time.  Sam pointed with a smirk.

Dean looked and groaned.  "Ride, don't read and ride, daughter.  You'll fall."

"That's what Uncle Sam said but I'm doing okay so far!" she called back.  She did fall a few minutes later when she hit a small hole in the ground but she didn't cry and whine like most kids.  Even if her daddy was there nearly instantly with the first aid kit to take care of her.  Bobby stole the book but Sam took it back.  They rode around until dark then went inside to clean up for school tomorrow.  Bobby managed to steal the book so she went to curl up next to him and read it with him.  He never minded when she did that.

Sam came in an hour later, finding both kids asleep with that stupid book on his son's chest.  He went to get the family camera, coming in to take a picture.

Dean followed, sighing as he snuck in to get the book and his daughter.  She swatted at him and Bobby nearly punched him but he still took Missy back to her own bed and the book got hidden in the freezer.  The kids couldn't see into it yet.  Sam and Dean shared a look.  They clearly had to warp Xander's kids away from books sometime soon before their kids learned more nerdly habits from the group up the road.

***

Xander walked into the office the next morning, finding Cera sitting on the front of his desk.  "Didn't like my chair?"

"I was hoping it wasn't where you were boinking Etta," she said dryly.

"She's not that sort of secretary, Cera."  Etta was choking at her desk.  "See?"

"Pity.  You could use a good girl, Xander."

"The girls have decided they want me with Dean."

She quirked an eyebrow up.  "I heard."  She slid off the front of the desk.  "Sixteen assholes later there's only two that we can't find of the original six.  Others decided they were right and joined in."

Xander grimaced.  "Where are the two?"

"Here."  He stared at her.  "I sent Gerald to watch over the girls with whoever you have with them.  Etta called someone already to warn them."

"We have a former potential who aged out."

"Interesting."  She slugged him on the arm.  "C'mon, I need backup.  You do pretty good at that and can keep up with a slayer.  Unlike most guys.  I *seriously* need a new guy, Xander."

"You live near a college, go find one," he told her.  "Have Chris pick you out one."

"I tried.  She's a slutty little bitch.  I sent her to Buffy to straighten out.  Buffy sent me back a swearing email for giving her another shallow little brat."  Xander smirked.  "How's Orlando doing with Talia?"

"Good.  She's doing fine up there."  He grabbed what he needed and followed her out.  "Etta, hunting down the last of the bastards who want to hurt the kids.  Tell Dean there's two locally.  Gerald should be finding them soon.  If not, I'll beat his ass for being so clueless."

"I can do that," she agreed happily.  She called Dean's cellphone to pass on that message and canceled Xander's morning appointment with the cute detective.  She would like to stare at him but it wasn't fair to make him wait around on Xander and Cera while they were hunting.  It could take days.

***

Xander walked into the underground bar, going up to the bartender.  He put down the two pictures Cera had of the stupid people.  "Are they in here?"

"Who're you?" he asked.

"Watchers Council.  They're some of ours and terminally stupid because they're going after my kids."

"Oh."  He backed off.  "They were about an hour ago, sir."

He smiled.  "I'm Xander.  I'm the new regional head.  I'm from Sunnydale and a weapons and gear person.  I'm only mean when you make me be."  The bartender relaxed at that.  "Where did they go?"

"Philip's Pub, down by the waterfront but it's a classy place."  He looked him over.  "You might not be able to get in."

Xander smiled.  "The credentials work there too."  He picked up the pictures.  "Thank you.  Let me know if you guys have problems.  I'm in the office every day."  That got a nod and he left.  Cera quit checking her forehead zit in the visor mirror when he got in.  "They went to a higher class pub."

"Miami has pubs?"

"Apparently one by the waterfront."  He drove them that way.  The map machine in the car was a godsend in this case.  They found it and he got out, buttoning his over-shirt back up.  The door guard gave him a horrified look so he pulled out his official ID, holding it up.  Then the two pictures.  "Ours, being bad.  Need spanked.  I can do it out here if you'll drag them out."

The bouncer took the pictures to look at.  "One's inside.  I haven't seen the other.  Wait here."  He went in to get the idiot.  They had seen the former head a few times before he went psycho.   He walked him and the man with him outside.  "Them, sir?"

"Well, one of them.  You are?" he asked the other.

"The regional head, boy.  You?"

Xander smirked.  "The actual regional head.  Second under Rupert Giles."  The man blanched.  "Cera, handcuff him.  We'll sort him out later on."  He smacked the other one into a building, knocking him out.  "Good."  They went into the trunk and he drove off.  He knew the bouncer was probably warning some others.  That was fine.  It'd mean the idiot couldn't hide as easily.  He pulled up in front of the lab's station, getting out and smiling at the officers.  "Is Lieutenant Caine here or CSI Duquesne?"

"Both are, sir.  Why?"

"Can you please tell them we found two more of the idiots who're trying to sacrifice my children.  One's still in town but we'll be getting him soon."

"Sure.  Are they properly secured?" he asked.

"They can't get weapons in the trunk."  The officer just nodded and made that call for him.  Two more officers came out.  Then Horatio came strolling out.  "Want two more?"

"Please.  Were you just by the waterfront at a pub?"

"Yes they were.  The other one I'll find after a drive-thru burger with Cera.  Cera, this is Lieutenant Caine.  He's the head of the felony crime lab.  I handed over Preston's idiocy to him when we found the first body."

"Hi," she said with a smile and a wave.  "The second one was with him and tried to say he had Xander's job.  We have no idea who he is."

"That's fine.  Better to be safe than have to kill him when he comes after the girls."  Xander popped the trunk for him, letting the officers get the two green looking people out.  "I think you have an exhaust leak, Xander."

"Possibly but it's her rental, Horatio.  I'll tell the rental desk that."

"That would be reasonable."

"I'll tie the next one on the roof."  He smiled and closed the trunk, walking around to get in.  "You'll see us soon."  He got in and drove them off.  "He's actually very nice and calm when things happen.  He had a scene with a wannabe black magic person and didn't even flinch."

"That's very cool of him.  We need more cops that don't flinch where I am.  Some of them see me getting milk at the corner store and nearly have a panic attack.  It's like I can't do normal things."

"Want to switch out?"

"Nope.  I like my quiet corner of the UK.  It's peaceful and there's lots of fields to goof off in if I ever find a new boyfriend."

"Okay.  If you want to switch, let us know."

"I can do that."  They drove to another section where he might be headed.

Xander paused in front of some guys on the street corner, getting out to lean on the hood.  He held up a picture when one looked over.  "Idiot trying to kill my daughters.  Have you guys seen him down here buying from anyone?"

"Who're you?" one asked.  "A cop?"

"A watcher.  I'm the holder of the apocalypse vault from LA."

The guys stared and one made a call, looking at him.  "Name?"

"Alexander Lavelle Harris."

The guy repeated that then hung up.  "He checks clean, guys."  He came over to look at it.  "He was with the boys up the road.  Wanted a gun with tranq darts for some reason."

Xander smirked.  "I have three girls he decided he wants to kill."

"That sucks."

"Someone will need to use the dart on him to save him," Xander assured him.  "Is he still there?"

"Nope.  Been about an hour.  I have no idea where he's going.  You need stuff?"

"I might someday soon but right now we've got leftovers from there and Cleveland.  If something that huge hits Miami, I'll donate and then come to refill."  The guy smirked at him.  "Honestly.  Thank you."  He handed over a fifty and got back into the car.  He drove them off.  "Tranq rifle."

She considered it.  "The house?"

"You can't get a shot off at the house from the road and Dawn put up anti violence wards around the land."  He considered it then headed for the school.  He called the principal on the way.  "It's Harris.  One of the people after my girls was said to have bought a tranq rifle.  I have no idea.  I know you have guards, can you have them do a quick check?"  He smiled and nodded.  "That'd be fine, thank you.  Heading your way actually."  He hung up and considered it then called Horatio.  "He has a tranq rifle.  I'm heading for the kids' school.  I don't know if he'd go there or how he'd know it was their school.  The guy getting into my desk wouldn't have found it in that drawer.  Please."  He hung up and went back to tapping the steering wheel with the music.

"Xander, nervous habits are annoying," Cera complained a few minutes later.

"Sorry.  I'm thinking."

"I know.  Still annoying.  You hum off key and are tapping off rhythm."

He shot her a grin.  "Sorry.  I'm but a humble, imperfect man according to Buffy and Willow."

"Willow needs screwed worse than I do, Xander.  It'd make her calm down the magic stuff again."  He groaned, shaking his head quickly.  "Not that horrible but probably bad.  Buffy had to yell and send her back to Devon.  She stopped in on the way there."

"Hopefully this time she won't try to end the world."  He had a thought and found his phone to call the office.  "Etta, call the school board, see which public school my girls would've went to please?"  She put him on hold while she did that.  "Thank you," he said when she reported back.  "That's where?"  He nodded, driving that way.  "We're in the car.  I've got one and the guy who was pretending to be me.  We know this one has a tranq rifle.  Be careful and alert the guards."  He hung up, heading that way.

None of the old line would expect his kids to be anywhere but public schools.  They all knew he didn't have money.  He drove around it, looking for the most likely spot.  "Etta said he's partially trained.  Failed military."  He found a good spot and went to check it but something was drawing him off.  The playground.  He went to find the spot there, finding him.  "Ha, got you," he hissed in his ear, making him flinch.  Xander slugged him, getting in two good ones before the guy managed to avoid and get out of his way.  Xander hit him again and knocked him back down.

Cera grabbed the gun to make it safe, then tossed it back into a bush.  She saw a security guard and a cop heading their way.  "This one was trying to kill the boss's daughters.  I tossed his gun in the bushes, Officer."  She turned when someone screamed.  The guy was locked by Xander's block.  Xander had just broken his arm too it looked like.  "Oh, let me play," she demanded.  "Piss drinking moron!"  She kicked him in the back, knocking him down to sob and hold his broken arm.  "Asshat."

Xander looked at her then at him.  "I don't even think a condom comes close to what he is, Cera."

"Huh?" she asked.

"Asshats.  Condoms used during gay sex?  Like we used to call them Jimmy Hats for het sex?"

She shook her head.  "Now I know why Buffy's so damn warped, Xander."  She kicked him in the hip when he tried to move, hearing a crunch.  "Thankfully I wore the chunky boots today.  Faith would be proud."

"Yes, he...she would," he agreed.

She looked at him.  "Really?" she asked dryly.  He gave her a smug look.  "Damn.  Which one?"

"Caleb.  He has very few memories."

"That's still cool."  She looked at the officer, who was watching them.  "Which cop was that we dropped the others off with?" she asked Xander.  "Cane?"

"Lieutenant Caine, with the crime lab.  He and a bunch of his buddies are trying to take three of my girls as a blood sacrifice.  Why he came here, since my kids don't, I'm not real sure."

"No one would put up with your children unless they had to by law," the man on the ground sneered.

"That's why they're reading at a fourth grade level in kindergarten?"  The man moaned, shaking his head.  "Or the fact that a few of them have skipped now and then?"  He leaned down.  "Just because I'm a bit dyslexic doesn't mean they are."  He kicked him again, making him scream in pain.

"Help me," he told the officer.  "He attacked me."

Xander looked at him.  "Call Lieutenant Caine please?"

"Definitely, sir.  That way he can straighten all this out and do the paperwork."

Xander smiled.  "He's a foreign national anyway.  They'll deport his stupid ass."

"I'm sure they'll have fun."  He made that call through dispatch, getting an answer back to go with the beaten person, he was not the victim, and to take the gun as well.  He did that, heading with him to the ER, where the nice Lieutenant would meet him to sort this out for him.

Cera looked at Xander.  "I deserve a treat."

"Do all girls see me and see that I give out treats?" he asked her.  "My girls beg for popsicles all the time.  Anya always wanted one.  Now you too?"

"You're too tough for me, Xander.  Is that tall one free?"

"The girls want him with Dawn but if you want to try your hand, check with her."

"Cool.  I might."

"He's got a son and a brother with a daughter."

"I saw and thought about creamy filling," she admitted, nodding at the guard.  "We would've been more subtle but he had it pointed at the playground, dude."

"That's fine.  Thank you, Miss.  Sir."  Xander nodded, walking her off.  He went to calm down and make a report to his bosses and the principal.  They weren't going to be happy but thankfully it was averted.  They'd have to put up cameras out there now.

***

Xander looked up as the nice lieutenant walked into his office.  "Did they get deported?"

"They did.  Mr. Giles called to swear about them as well.  So we kindly sent them to his former office in England so he could deal with them."  Xander smiled at that, nodding some.  "You could have let us help, Xander.  It would have been easier and better."

Xander leaned back.  "Lieutenant, I'm realistic.  You have over a hundred guys to catch every month.  My daughters are more important to me than they would be to you or your team.  Just because you have other cases you have to handle.  Beyond that, I could ask gang kids if they had sold him anything and hit the underground bars that your people couldn't.  As well as being the most overprotective parent on the face of the earth about my children.  If I was having that much trouble, I would have called.  I'll be honest and tell you

I will call if I run into that sort of problem.  That's also why I handed them over so I wouldn't kill them.  I know myself too well."

"The ones you sent to the ER were quite injured."

"I kept my temper in check that much, Lieutenant.  Otherwise you'd be cleaning up tiny parts."

"I can understand that urge."

"Yes, but most of us who have that urge don't have the training I have to make it so."

"True.  Which is why we worried."

Xander shrugged.  "Hunting them isn't any harder than hunting vampires who want to kill and play with us.  I admit I did lose my temper, but this time it was more personal to me than trying to attack me."

"I understand."  He smiled slightly, taking off his sunglasses.  "Next time, call us first to warn us, then go hunting?"

"If I hear of another one, I'll try."

"Thank you."  He smirked.  "Those files were very helpful.  Did you know he owned the property you're living on?"

"Only if he paid back the money he stole from the Council to buy it."  He found that entry and handed it over.  "He bought it with Council money, even if he put it into his name.  That makes it ours I believe.  Some lawyer might not agree but he didn't have anyone to protest it.  I've already filed to have it seized along with his off-shore accounts.  Our lawyer knows we're living in the remaining buildings."

"Good to know.  May I?"  Xander nodded.  "Anything else coming up?"

"Not that we're aware of.  The hellmouth in the Keys is doing all right at the moment.  It's nowhere near starting to open.  The demon commune down by it is acting all right at the moment.  No overt problems that I've heard of.  The girls working locally are doing fine most of the time.  Dean had to help in Orlando once.  They've got information coming in on a hunt upstate as well.  So I'll be hellion sitting that day."  Horatio smirked and nodded at that.  "They are.  Evil little hellions most of the time."

"Most children are," he assured him dryly.  "Thank you for not killing them."

"I do try not to.  Now, if they had my daughter bleeding already?  All bets are off."

"Good to know."  He walked off with that new information.  Xander was definitely an overprotective parent for a good reason.

Xander sent an email to the Council's lawyer about the crime lab having all that information on Prestons.  Then he got back to his paperwork.  He hated paperwork.  The break had been a nice one.   If the paperwork had been like it was last Friday, he would've swooned at the nice lieutenant's feet with a cry of 'my hero'.

***

Missy pouted at Bri, her usual evil helper.  "Daddy said if we did any more plotting this year he'd ground me and send me to school far away with mean women who hated men."

"Daddy threatened us with mean nuns," Bri admitted, grimacing as she sat next to her friend.   "We need to be more sneaky.   Your daddy even got onto us about reading all the time."

"Us too.  He had us watch MTV one night so we could see all the skanky hos on the videos."  She shrugged.  "I asked to make Uncle Sammy blush, but he only said they're fake.  I won't have to look like that.  Daddy did say I couldn't have roller skates afterwards."

"Your dad and uncle are much cooler than ours," she complained.  "Daddy growled at us last night."

"Nightmares?"

"Yes."  She pouted at her sister, getting an eye roll.  "She didn't have any."  She looked at her partner in mischief.  "How are we going to make them see that we have to stay together?"

"I don't know.  They're still saying being locked in there isn't the same thing."  They considered it.  "Handcuffs?"

"Daddy can pick locks," Bri told her.

"Uncle Sam can too."  They went back to considering it.  "Oooh!  The stuff Etta got delivered the other day?"  She bounced some, beaming at Bri.  "She said they would be like rings."

"Maybe," she said.  "I don't know what they do.  I don't want to hurt them.  I really don't want Daddy to be hurt."

"It was in English.  We can read what was written on the package."

Bri gave her an evil smirk.  "If that doesn't work, maybe we'll talk to the big guy who delivered the triplets?"

"Ooooh.  Daddy would be *so* pissed if we talked to someone like him."  She glanced around.  No one was paying attention to them. "Isn't he a demon?" she asked more quietly.

"Yeah but he's not really bad.  Daddy said we can't yell at him."  She considered it.  "Maybe we can ask him if those won't work?"

"Daddy would beat me."

"Fine.  I'll ask."  She beamed.  "We'll see what happens.  I'll make sure it won't hurt them."  The bell rang and they went back inside from recess, heading to their desks.  The teacher was very nice to them and they'd get to read some today since there was playtime.

***

Bri walked into Caleb's room.  "I need help."

"Is Daddy going to be mad at us?" he asked, starting to frown.

"No.  He'll be happier."  She smiled.  "C'mon, it won't hurt and Daddy won't yell.  We're going to talk to the one who gave you to us."

"He only comes when Daddy calls."

Bri smiled.  "We can call him if we work together.  He likes you."

Caleb pouted.  "I don't want grounded too.  Or even spanked because Daddy might if we try that.  You know how he can be when we talk to demons."

"I know but he won't mind this time.  I promise."  Caleb gave him a dirty look.  "If he does, I'll cover for you.  That way you don't get grounded away from the books."

Caleb grinned, nodding.  "Okay.  Where are we doing it?"

"Out back.  C'mon."  Caleb got off his bed and went out with her.

"Could've sworn it was bedtime," Xander said from his spot doing dishes.

"It's pretty and still light, Daddy.  I'm going to teach him how to ride Missy's bike."  She led him outside.  That was a good excuse.  She nodded at Missy to distract her father and uncle while she took  Caleb and Adanne out back with her.  "Here, send up a quiet yell for him, Caleb."

"D'Hoffryn?" he called quietly.  "Bri needs to talk to you."  He heard someone walking their way so he stopped.  That wasn't a demon.  It was a people.  He pointed for Bri's benefit.

Adanne moved to protect them, knocking the person out as soon as they came out of the trees.  "Uncle Dean!" she yelled.  "Intruders!"

He came jogging back.  "What are you guys doing back here?"

"Looking for frogs," Bri told him.  "Caleb was reading a book and I thought I heard one.  That way he could look at a real one."

"Fine," he muttered, looking the guy over.  "I don't know him."

"I knocked him out," Adanne said proudly.

"Good job, Adanne."  He hauled him up with a grunt, hauling him off.  "Come out front, guys."

"Let me find the froggy first," Caleb complained.  "That way I can have a pet too."  Dean just shook his head.  He looked around then up.  "Mr. D'Hoffryn?" he called quietly.  Another demon showed up.  "You're not a Mr. D'Hoffryn."

"No, but I'm one of his people.  What's up, kids?"

"I wanted his help to help Daddy," Bri said with a smile.

"Why would he help your father?" she asked, looking confused.

"Our daddy's Xander and it would keep us safer," Adanne said with a smile.  "You're over which one?"

"Children hurt by adults."  She stared at them.  "Speaking of, you guys should probably head around front where there's more people."

"We just got one," Caleb complained.

"There's hardly ever just one, kids.  Shoo.  I'll tell the boss to see if he wants to be asked." They ran off.  She shook her head, going to find her boss.  "Two girls and a boy, who was marked by you, were just calling for you.  The middle girl wanted you to help her daddy Xander?"

He groaned, shaking his head.  "Harris," he told her.  "Some of his spawn."

"Ah.  That makes more sense then."  She nodded.  "They had someone try to grab them so I answered when they called for you.  I said I'd tell you."

"I'll check on them tonight.  Thank you."

"Welcome."  She went back to work.

He watched over the children.  The other one sneaking around the grounds was attacked by a lesser demon that was living in a tree, bringing everyone running when he started to scream because his leg was being eaten after being ripped off.  Sam got the kids inside to call 911 while they tied his leg shut from the bleeding.  That was nice.  It was nicer that Xander only sneered that he deserved it for being near their kids.  He looked a bit stressed.  D'Hoffryn waited until everyone was in bed, then appeared in the girls' room, poking the one who had called.  "Adanne, you needed something?"

"Bri did," she hissed.  "To help Daddy."

He nodded, going to wake her up.  Adanne followed, being a good, overprotective big sister.  She had learned well from her father.  He woke her up.  "Briony, you needed something important?"  She held up the letter she had written out so their father didn't wake up.  He read it over then smirked.  "He will yell."

"They need to realize it so the pack stays strong," she told him quietly.

"I made sure he won't wake up, children."  He sat on the foot of her bed.  "He will be quite upset."

"We already consider them married so we'd have to ruin whoever they went out with.  That would be really mean, right?"

"Yes it would."

"And Daddy says she's enjoying being evil," Adanne added quietly.  "Because she and Missy Winchester have been making plots."

"Some day you two will make a wonderful set of hunters, girls."  He looked over the request.  It was easily doable.  He had an idea to make it easier though.  "Is this the only time you want to use them?"

"No, Uncle Sam and Auntie Dawn need help too," Bri assured him. "We tried a makeover but he realized it before coffee and Auntie Dawn only flirted more."

He smirked at her little evil genius plans.  "I'll see what I can do.  Either of those will know if I come near them."

"Which is why we want to put something like cuffs on them," Bri told him.  "They won't wake up if we sneak in to cuddle.  Just grunt and cuddle back."

He nodded.  "Good point."  He smiled, patting her on the head.  "Some day you may become one of mine, Briony.  You have a very good planning mind."  He stood up.  "I'll see what I can do."  He disappeared.

Bri smiled at Adanne.  "Thank you."

"Welcome."  She went back to her own bed and snuggled back into the warm spot.  Maybe this time Daddy would just accept it instead of fighting about it.  He needed to accept it.

***

Dean woke up and looked around.  He was in his room but something was wrong.  "Sammy?" he called, sitting up.  No answer.  He checked around again.  Nothing was obviously out of place.  He checked himself over.  That's when he noticed he had a bit of bling that he hadn't been wearing before.  Underneath his warding bracelets was a simple looking, flat, thin silver bangle that wasn't too loose, just loose enough to be able to move around his wrist.  He touched it.  It felt normal to him.  "Where did you come from, the jewelry fairy?" he muttered.  He grabbed his sweatpants to put on over his boxer-briefs and walked out, going to wake his brother up.  Sammy had one on his wrist too.  "Huh."  He gave him a shake, getting a murderous look.  He held up his brother's wrist with the hand that had his bangle on it.

Sam glared at it.  "I don't own anything like that."

"Me either," Dean said, shifting his.

Sam grimaced.  "That's not good."

"Probably not.  I felt something off."

"Let me see if Dawn's wards went off."  He got up with a groan, grabbing his robe.  Dawn's car was outside so he called her phone, getting one grumpy witch.  "Dean and I both woke up with .... bracelets, yeah.  Why?" he asked when she started to mutter about wearing one.  "Can you check the wards and them, Dawn?  I know you have to work today."  He smirked at his brother.  "Thank you.  We'll be here after we take the kids to school."  He hung up.  "She's wearing one too.  Hers has blue stones."

"Ours are plain," Dean said, looking his over.  "No clasp, no inscription, no runes, nothing.  Just plain silver."

Sam checked his then shrugged.  "I don't know yet.  Let her see if she can find out anything."  They heard a yell from a male voice.  "Xander's not happy this morning."

Dawn came jogging in, taking Sam's wrist to look at.  "Fuck, he was right.  It is demonic," she muttered.  She looked up at him.  "Did you make a wish?"

"No," he said carefully, staring down at her.  "Why would I have?"

"It's wish magic.  Like Anya was.  That's how Xander recognized it."  She looked at Dean's then sighed.  "Thank god, yours isn't set for me."  She let his wrist go.  "Let's get the kids to school.  Then we can figure this stuff out.  I'll call off today."  She muttered as she walked back to their house, staring at the kids who looked really tired for some reason.  "Did anyone have any nightmares last night?" she asked.

Xander lifted his head from his cereal, looking at his evil genius in training.  "Bri," he said dryly.

"What?" she asked, giving him an attempt at an innocent look.

"You lie like crap, girl," Dawn told her.  "Who did it?"

"We asked Uncle D'Hoffryn his advice on how to make you less stubborn," Adanne said quietly.

"Since when is D'Hoffryn an uncle?" Xander asked.

"Since he gave us siblings to play with."  She stuffed her mouth.

Dawn stared at them.  "I was doing just fine on my own, ladies."

Amanda snorted.  She usually stayed out of the way of this argument but she had to stick up for her twin.  "If you were, you wouldn't have spent your night off with us."  She stuffed her mouth too.

Bri nodded, swallowing between bites.  "You'd be giggly with Uncle Sam."  She stuffed her mouth again.

Xander looked at Dawn, who was looking like she was going to beat them to death.  Dean walked in and started to grab backpacks.  "Thank you."

"We'll beat them later.  Once we know what they did this time."

"They asked Uncle D'Hoffryn's advice on how to make us quit fighting their wishes," Dawn said dryly.

Dean looked at the girls.  "Was my daughter involved in this?"

Bri shook her head.  "No."

"Who talked to D'Hoffryn?" Xander asked.  Adanne and Bri raised her hand.  He looked at Dean.  "Can you make sure they have a safe day at school while I vent and scream at the office?"

"Sure, we can do that then beat them later.  It's the weekend tomorrow, the others won't see them limping."  He got the kids down to the van, taking them to school.

Xander looked at Dawn.  "How are these usually set?" he asked calmly.

"No clue yet.  Let me look some stuff up."  She went to grab her laptop, eating some leftover toast on the way.

***

Dean handed the girls to the principal.  "Their evil plans got too evil last night.  Keep them safe today please."

"Are they in trouble?"

Dean smirked.  "A lot.  They were talking to people they shouldn't have and other neat things."

"Oh, dear."

"Oh, yeah.  So we're going to be using the school day to calm ourselves."

"They can have some detention tonight.  That'll give you an extra half an hour."

"That might save them," he admitted.  "No playing this morning," he told Adanne since she was headed for the playground.  "Go inside, sit at your desks, and be good children today for a change."  They ran for the door.  He looked at the principal.  "One of us will pick them up later.  Thank you."

"You're welcome, Mr. Winchester."  She waited until he had gone to go talk to the girls.  "What did you do that upset him that badly?"

"We made sure that the family pack is very strong and that he'd quit fighting with us about marrying Uncle Xander," Missy said with a happy smile.  "That way I don't have to make any girl he looks at insane to drive her off of my daddy's lap."

Bri nodded.  "That way our daddy gives us a good stepmommy," she agreed.  "We like Uncle Dean that way.  Plus Uncle Sam and Auntie Dawn.  So we made sure of it."

The principal looked at the children.  "Usually you're all such nice, well behaved children."  She went to call Xander's cellphone.  "I've given them detention so you have an extra half an hour.  They told me that.  Are you all right?"  He growled something.  "I understand.  Of course they won't have recess or library time today, Mr. Harris.  I know how much the children like to read.  No, if they come in limping on Monday I won't call anyone.  I hope you can straighten them out.  They're usually such nice children."  She hung up and made a note to those teachers so they wouldn't let those brats outside or to the library.  Really, some children were just spoiled.  Clearly her other students had been having a bad effect on those ones since they usually acted so much better.

***

Xander came off the elevator and the wards lit up around him.  "I know," he called.  He turned them off.  They came back.  He turned them off again.  They came back.  Dawn came off the elevator and shut them off when he started to growl.  "Thank you," he said.

"It's annoying," she assured him.  They walked past a horrified looking Etta.  "The kids talked to D'Hoffryn last night and did something about their plans to marry us off.  That's all the wards caught.  I'm heading for the library.  Please call Willow and wake her up?  I know she's in England."  She headed that way.

Xander went into his office to send an email to Cera and Buffy.  One of them could easily beat his daughters into better behavior.  Because he might not stop if he started wailing on them.

Etta leaned in a moment later.  "Xander, do you need anything?"

"Check the spell closet for Dawn.  She's got to figure out what our new fashion accessory is," he said, holding up his wrist.

"That's a bonding bracelet."  His head lifted slowly.  "Um, they've been used in the past to bond demon clans together to form a larger one if I remember my demonic history correctly."  He continued to stare.  "I'll tell her that," she said, fleeing from him.  She had heard he had a temper.  Clearly it was high today.  "They're bonding bracelets.  Look at the clan reformation of 1886, Miss Summers."

"Thank you."  She found that book and went to the section the index said covered it.  She leaned back to read, going over the dry account of how two warring clans joined into one larger one.  She looked at the bracelet then at the office.  "He won't like being the wife," she muttered, going back to her reading.  "D'Hoffryn should probably run," she decided when she finished.  She got up, taking the book to the office.  Dean and Sam were in there.  "Etta told me."

He read over the section, looking at his.  Then at her bracelet.  "Uh-huh."  He went back to reading.  "Anything else on them?"

"I've only started to look.  That's the info Etta gave me."

The brothers nodded, Sam getting up to help her while Xander got the book to look over.  Xander looked at his wrist.  "I don't think I want to be a wife," he told Dean.  Who snorted but looked slightly happier at that weak joke.  "We'll have to see how it plays out and if we can get the things off."  His phone rang.  "Harris," he answered.  "Hi, Giles."  He leaned back, waving Dean to stay.  "Yes, there was a slight magical problem last night.  Adanne and Bri decided to talk to D'Hoffryn.  They wanted help with their plans to get me and Dean Winchester married.  Plus Dawn and his brother Sam hitched too.  We woke up this morning in what appears to be bonding bracelets.  No, mine has pretty stones.  Both Winchesters are plain silver.  Do we know anything about them?  Dawn called off to help Sam research."

He listened then made a note on something.  "Saw that mention already.  Etta told us."  He made another note.  "I'll pass that one.  Any clues, Giles?"  He grimaced.  "Think our redheaded temper tantrum could?"  He shuddered.  "No, leave her there then.  We'll figure it out.  Thank you for the intel.  No, we're fine.  The kids are at school so we don't kill them but we're fine."  He smirked.  "Exactly.  Thank you, Giles."  He hung up.  "Sam, Dawn?"  Sam walked back in.  He held up his notes.  "From Giles, other mentions he's heard of with these very nice artifacts that can't be removed without using powers stronger than the demon who placed them."

"Willow's where?" he asked.

"Devon.  She nearly snapped and went back to being scary, veiny Willow again when she got gaybashed visiting Buffy."

"So she's probably out?"

"She's back to working on her control of her magic addiction."

"Wonderful," he muttered, walking off to look those up.  Dawn knew where they were so he got one, she got the other, and they sat down to plot how to beat their kids without getting CPS called on them.

***

Xander was walking the kids into the office when Willow and Buffy appeared.  "Come to beat my heathens?" he asked Buffy.

"Maybe.  Giles said you're probably panicking a lot.  Why?"  He held up his wrist.  "Shiny and subtle.  Not your usual taste."

"D'Hoffryn put them on us after the girls talked to him."

Buffy looked at them.  "Slayers aren't allowed to be evil.  That makes them a rogue slayer and therefore bad."

"It makes Daddy happier," Missy told her.

Dean looked out of the office at her.  "Not really.  I do like girls, Melissa."

"Girls don't understand you, Daddy.  That's why you got for the cheap looking hos with big titties and booty shorts."

Dean groaned, going back to the couch in there with his headache.  Willow walked in to look at his wrist.  "I tried to remove it earlier.  I got a sudden splitting migraine from the flash of Xander's thoughts."

She grimaced.  "That's not a good sign."  She tested it magically, then went to check on Dawn and Sam.  "At least this one likes to research," she said in greeting.

"They picked the better hunter for Xander and the researcher for me," Dawn said, looking up at her.  "They both have kids too."

"I remember.  Hi, Sam."  She tested his bracelet and then hers.   "Let me do something."  She found the magical clasp on Dawn's and she nearly shrieked in agony when she tried to open it.  "Nope, non-removable."

"Don't kill my sister," Buffy yelled.  "I'd hate to make you give birth to her the next time, Willow."

"I wasn't, Buffy.  Chill."  She went over it again.  "There's a few subtle runes on the other side."  She ran her finger around the underside.  "I can't tell what they are by feel."

"I don't think I can regenerate a hand if you cut it off," Dawn said dryly.

"It'd probably plant itself on the stump if I tried," Willow said, backing off.  She fed Dawn some healing energy then looked at Sam.  "I don't think they can be removed.  As for the magic, it's not tainting you any that I can find."

Dean strolled in.  "No taint?"

"Not that I can tell from Dawn or Xander.  I know them better so I'd feel new taint.  We might have to ask D'Hoffryn to take them off."  A letter floated down addressed to her.  She opened it and read, then went pale.  "If we remove them you'll spend a week in hellish pain from being inside your chosen mate's mind then die from it," she said, handing it to Dawn.  "It's a permanent link.  Even past death."  She looked at Dean.  "Treat my Xander-shaped friend well or I'm going to beat you to death with a shovel then use it to split your body parts up for easier burial.  Got it, mister?"

"Sure, but I don't like boys.  That's going to be a problem."

"Not really.  It says the bracelets were built to overcome those problems by teaching you how to do it and fixing anything that might restrict the getting together," Dawn said, handing it to him.  "It does note that it won't work past birth control however.  So we're safe there if we slip."  She looked at Sam.  "It also says it's charmed to encourage more physical bonding, at which time the bond will grow closer until a natural mate's telepathy is formed slowly enough that it won't kill us."

"Won't happen unless we both want it to," Sam said quietly.  He took the letter from Dean.  "Xander?" he called.

"Minute."  He came in a minute later.  "I had to put two of them into uncomfortable positions in corners so they can't move."  He took the note to read, then sighed, looking at Dean.  "I tried gay sex.  I didn't really like it that much."

"The letter says it'll help with that," Dawn told him.  She went back to her research.  Just because D'Hoffryn was very powerful didn't mean he knew everything.  There might be a way to open it without dying.  Sam did the same.

Willow looked at Xander.  "Want me to talk to them?"

"Joyce tried with Tara and the boys' dad.  Apparently it didn't work real well."

She grimaced.  "Joyce could make Buffy see sense and calm Dawn down when she was bouncing.  She couldn't get through to yours?"  He shook his head.  "Do we want to send them to school for a bit?  Cera has some excellent ones near her."  Xander growled, making her back away.  "Not to threaten, Xander, but to keep them out of trouble."  The growls got deeper so she fled for her life.

Dean patted Xander on the back.  "Calm down.  She won't hurt the kids.  We'll hurt the kids but she won't."  Xander sank into a chair, holding his head.  He heard the elevator ding and looked out there.  "Lieutenant, bad timing."

"Is there an emergency?"

"The girls went to a higher demon to have them magically married," Buffy said, smiling at him.  "Hi, Buffy Summers, senior slayer."

"Pleasure to meet you, Miss Summers.  I'm Lieutenant Caine, with the crime lab."  Xander leaned back to look out the door.  "There you are.  The lawyers and judge wanted to talk to you."

"We've been trying to get unmarried today," he said dryly.  "What happened now?"

"The judge doesn't think that the Council can seize assets to cover what he embezzled."

"Yes it can," Sam told him.  "Any first year law student could argue that one."

"Then perhaps the judge is a problem," Buffy asked.

"Could be," Dean agreed.

Xander sighed.  "I hate being in a command position."  He called him from his cellphone.  "It's Xander.  I heard from the Lieutenant.  No, I've been dealing with the problem the kids caused.  D'Hoffryn actually."  He looked up.  "If he's a demon, let me know."  A new letter floated down.  "Hey, a banishing charm for a judge that's a demonic scarab beetle."  The lawyer shuddered, he could hear him.  "So, anyway, yes we can seize it."  He smirked.  "Really?  Then we can surely protest and file an appeal since that's the law, Timothy."  He hung up and sighed, calling someone else.  "It's Xander.  I'm calling in that poker favor.  The Council needs a good lawyer to handle a demonic judge in Miami over the last regional head's issues.  Thank you.  We're here."  He hung up and called the lawyer back.  "You're getting help," he said then hung up.  He leaned back to rub his eyes.  "This is a cluster fuck in the making."

A demon appeared.  "For a fee I can fix it for you," he offered with a giant smile.

Dean pulled out a gun and shot him.  "No thanks.  Don't like deals like that, dude."  He put his gun back and went back to helping them research.

Xander looked at the dead demon then at Dean.  Buffy said it though.  "Xander would've done something like that.  Good job sucking his mind into yours, Dean."  She fled when Dean glared at her.

Horatio looked then at the boys.  "That was probably not a good thing to do, boys."

"It's a demon," Xander pointed out.  "He brought it on himself by coming to try to make a deal right now."  He looked at him.  "He deserved it."

"Fine.  I'll make sure no officers come near the house anytime soon."

Xander smirked.  "Let them try.  We do have protections."  He went back to helping research.  Dawn got up to protect the house.  Horatio left and an hour later a pissed off looking man came off the elevator.  Xander nudged Dean, turning to look at him. "Even judges have to follow written law, Your Honor."  He went back to reading.

"You're a blight," he sneered.  "Not even a proper watcher."

Xander stood up to look at him.  "No, you're right.  I'm the power behind the old slayer line," he said smoothly, smirking evilly at him.  "Born and bred Sunnydale baby and, yes, a hunter too."  The judge backed up, looking horrified.  "As for the law, it's very clear.  If you try to ruin it, I'll let my girls be evil on you instead of on us.  After all, they need a new target now since mine won't want more siblings."  He moved closer, making the other man back off.  "As for the lawyer, we'll see what's going to happen to him since we're not sure he was working in our interests."  The judge started to splutter.  "Now, I do know what you are and how to send you back," he snarled.  "This is starting to border on threatening my children."  The judge fled.  Xander went back to the research table then looked at them.  "I'm going to head home.  I think I need to summon something."  He grabbed a book and walked off looking very smug.

"I've seen that same look on Bri's face," Dean quipped.

"Yup, that's where they got it from," Dawn agreed, smirking at him.  "Xander's been too tired to be evil for a while.  The kids really do tire him out."  She went back to researching.  At least until Etta ran in and babbled, turning on the small tv they had in the corner.  They all watched the demons fleeing downtown Miami.  "Hmm.  Xander's not happy."

Etta stared at her in horror.  "He did that?"

"The judge tried to bend the law to get us evicted from the property."

"Oh, dear.  Mr. Giles....."

Dawn gave her a look.  "Giles is going to rant, rave, clean his glasses a few times, have a scotch neat, and then say they deserved it for going near him and the kids."  She went back to reading.  "He was impressed that Xander hadn't destroyed the last ones in Cleveland."  She turned a page.  "But go ahead and tell him."  She floated the phone over when it rang.  "Watchers Council, library."  She listened.  "Yup, that's him, Willow.  Because the judge tried to screw up too.  Sure, you do that."  She hung up.  "She's going to take whatever funky spell it is that makes Xander have chaos around him off soon."

Sam and Dean watched as the judge came running at him with a sword and suddenly changed into a walking bug with a sword.  Xander defeated his weak skills with his own blade and moved to handle the next one.  "Did he cause that or is he just taking advantage of it to wear out his temper?" Dean asked finally.

Dawn looked.  "The demons heard that rumors about the Council having problems.  They tried to overtake the city.   Xander's just doing what a Xander does.  Hey, Buffy?  Xander's off beating the snot out of a lot of demons."

She came in to look and sighed.  "Xander!" she complained.  She headed out.  Outside a cop car came screeching up.  "Take me to him.  That's my job, not his."

"Who're you?" the officer demanded.  "We were told to come get Mr. Harris!"

"He's already there.  I'm a slayer, take me to him!"  She got in and he sped off.  Cleveland and Rome's officers were so much nicer, but less cute than this one.  It proved to her that handsome guys were asses.  She got out once they got to the area of the problem, walking over to pick up a demon and shake him.  "Don't make me break a nail."

"It's Summers!" he shouted.  The others started to flee.

Xander  pulled something out and fired it at the escaping ones.  The net caught a lot of them.  "Try it again," he snarled, staring at one whimpering at his feet.  The judge.  "If you do, I can remember Sunnydale fondly.  I haven't seen an apocalypse in over a year."  The judge whined and tried to move but two of his six legs were broken.

Buffy put down the one she was holding, walking over to look him over.  "Injured?"  He shook his head.  "Good."  She smacked him on the head.  "Stupid!  You're not a slayer!"

"Shut up, Buffy."  He looked around.  "Anyone else wanna piss me off?" he yelled.  "I can get other slayers here.  Cera needs a vacation.  She'd like the time in a bikini."  The rest limped off to hide and eat the more wounded.  He looked down at the judge, smirking some.  "Welcome to my Miami.  Have a pleasant stay and quit causing trouble or see me again, next time with my baby."

"The girls are too young to fight," Buffy pointed out.

"My battle axe," he said, glaring at her.

"Oh, that one.  Can you maybe calm down?  You have SlayerMS."

"It's been a long day," he told her.

"Clearly.  Maybe you should try gay sex again?  It might make you calmer.  It does me when I find a nice guy."

He sneered.  "Not with what you date."

"Pot.  Kettle," she retorted.

"Children," an officer shouted.

"Fuck off," Xander told him.  "I backed her up for years and had to watch her date dangerous assholes."  He looked at her.  "How's your newest one?"

"They just arrested him for killing and eating three people."  She shrugged. "Yours?"

"He's probably researching."

"He was when I left.  How's B'letta?"

"Helped the kids plan Sam's makeover."

"At least she wasn't evil, even if she was an assassin."  They walked off together.  "Cleaning crew?"

Xander turned and looked back at the area.  Then at the officer.  "I can have someone do a flame spell if you want.  That way there's no clean up."

"No thanks.  We have an incinerator that should do, Mr. Harris."

Xander nodded.  "Call for the next one and I'll come kick butt again."  He walked off, hiking back to the building.  Buffy kept up with him.  "What am I going to do about this?" he complained.  "I don't want a husband.  This thing marks me as the wife.  That's why they got the simple one and I got the decorated one."

She shrugged.  "Can you do anything but accept it?"

"Maybe not."

"Dawn said it'd draw you together."

"He's straight.  I doubt that'll help him any."

"The letter said it'd compensate and help with that problem."

Xander grimaced.  "I'd rather have it because he wanted me, not the bracelet making him."

"Good point.  I know that's important to you.  What is that one's thing about skanky hos?"

"Her daddy tends to date them.  Her uncle told her to call them that."

"Oh," she said, nodding some.  "Makes sense then.  You're definitely not one of those."

"No but I don't have the equipment he'd like anyway."

"Maybe it'll be like a friendship marriage, Xander.  That could be good for both of you;  more backup when the girls start to plot next time."

"They can't have siblings so it won't be that bad."

"True.  Maybe they'll try to fix their teachers up."

"The kindergarten teacher laughed about them plotting to hitch me and Dean."

"See, no more laughy teacher," she said, making him snort but look happier.  She looked behind them.  A cop car was following really slowly.  "I think they're worried, Xander."

Xander turned and waved.  "Heading back to the office, guys.  Shoo, go back to saving the rest of Miami."  He took a shortcut down an alley, letting her walk with him.  "I don't know what to do about this yet."

"You'll figure it out, Xander.  You know you will.  You always do.  No matter what sort of evil thing you date."

"Dean's not evil.  He's a hunter."

"Demons would consider him evil.  Willow pointed out that evil was relative to where you were standing and looking.  Unless it was universal evil like a hell goddess or a Nazi."

"I guess that's a good point," he admitted.  He glanced back, one officer was still following them.  Buffy took his arm to make him keep walking instead of turning around to talk to him.  "I'm not used to departments that don't ignore things."

"Me either.  Rome tends to complain a lot and want priests to come make sure I'm right now and then."  She shrugged.  "They're strange that way."

"Makes me long for Sunnydale again," he sighed.

"Some days, yeah.  It was a lot easier to run across than either of our cities are.  Plus no one cared if the demons ate the statues in Sunnydale.  They freak out in Rome."  He nodded at that.  "What're we going to do about the evil, plotting ones?"

"I tried, they tried, your mom and their dad tried.  I'm out of options outside of spanking the hell out of them."

"I think all kids have a little bit of hell in them, Xander.  I did.  I heard you did."  He nodded, grinning some.  "Maybe their evil plans are done with now that they've got what they wanted."

"Maybe," he decided.  He waved back at the officer.  "We're right there, dude.  Go relax."

"Sir, we need to make sure nothing else ends up needing to be cleaned up," he said firmly.

Xander smiled.  "No, I'm not going to use the sword on the kids who hatched evil plots and talked to demons to get their way.  Spanking possibly.  Well, probably, but not the sword."

"If you say so.  We still need to make sure, sir."

Xander sighed.  "If you must.  Having a nice walk?"

"It's very pleasant not to have to run after people, yes, sir."

Xander smiled.  "I like you.  You should patrol around the demon areas more often since you have sense."

"I'd hate that.  So would my family when it drove me insane."

"I hunted the bad things like that for years," he told him.  "Insane is a matter of opinion."

"I'm Southern Baptist, sir.  It'd be fairly quick.  My preacher is going to have a long talk with me tonight about this before I go home."

"Religion makes a lot of people feel better," Buffy told him with a small smile.  "I'm Rome's slayer and the senior one.  I've seen lots of priests looking for why things happen."  He just nodded at that.  He escorted them to the door, watched them get on the elevator, then called that in and phoned his minister next.  They came off the elevator, finding both Winchesters waiting on them.  "All cleaned up."

Dean stared at her.  "That was bad."

"No, that was a pretty minor push for more power and area," Xander told him.  "Like gangs fighting."

"No, Lieutenant Caine said that was bad," Sam told him with a long look over them both.  "Injuries?"

"Few scratches, nothing major," Buffy told him.  "We're old pros at this, guys.  We had nightly hunting in Sunnydale."  She walked him into the library, finding the nice lieutenant in there waiting on them.  "Hi.  Cera said she had met you.  Buffy Summers."

He shook her hand.  Maybe she had short term memory issues and forgot their earlier meeting?  Possibly from too many head injuries or hair dye too often?  "Lieutenant Caine, Miss Summers.  Mr. Harris, I thought you were supposed to warn us."

"If I had any warning I would have.  I was stomping off in a snit when they started and I moved in to handle it, Horatio.  Sorry."

"I suppose that does happen.  Not that often?"

"No, not that often," he assured with a smile.  "They thought the rest of the Council was being tanked by demons so they decided to make their move for more room to grow and host their families.  Basically like a gang wanting more area."

Horatio nodded.  "I can understand that urge.  Is it possible for the ones who ...made their move to leave Miami?"

"Most of them are injured and a lot of the ones in the area would eat them for being so weak and bringing attention," Buffy told him.  "Therefore no more problems and less slime on our clothes when we have to go hunting."

He nodded once at that.  "I can see that happening.  Thank you for handling it.  Xander, call your lawyer?"

"I did earlier and got him some help since the judge wasn't human and trying to be pushy about the laws bending too.  So was our lawyer."

"Interesting.  Did I see him there?"

"Yeah, the red one that attacked me was him.  Pity but his choice, not mine.  I only defended when he attacked me."

"Good to know."  He slipped back into his sunglasses.  "I have had a talk with the children about how evil thoughts and plans often landed you in our holding cells.  They may be suitably scared straight but we do offer tours."

"I'll tell their principal so she can arrange it.  We've already had one racist set of boys who attacked them.  Thank you."

"Not a problem.  This time."  He shook their hands and left.

Buffy waited until he was in the elevator to whistle.  "I need more guys like that in Rome.  A bit dangerous, a bit forceful.  Kinda hotty but not too cute so they're not assholes.  Might understand the calling because he's got a similar job only with humans."  She sat down, fanning her face.  "I needed those happy dreams tonight."

"If we don't need them, there's an apartment set upstairs," Sam offered dryly.

She smirked.  "After I threaten you properly to treat my little sister nicely."

"I'd never mistreat anyone who was mine, Buffy.  I'd beat the hell out of anyone who tried to hurt her, but never her.  I only hurt the bad things that're hurting others."

"Good," she said with a smile, standing up.  "Because you don't want to know what an enraged slayer can do to a human body.  All the extra strength and speed would do really nasty things that I'd hate too clean out of my clothes."  She walked past him.

"I don't get threatened?" Dean asked dryly.

"Nope.  Because if you hurt Xander, it won't be me that'll do it to you.  It'll be Willow turning you into something she can play with magically for a good, long time."  She smirked back at him.  "We'd have to give you a merciful death eventually so she'd quit playing with you."  She got onto the elevator and headed up to the apartments.  They were pretty nice.  The beds were even comfy.  Better than the one above the office in Rome.

Xander looked at them.  "She might sic Willow on both of you.  I'll try to stop her though.  We know this isn't your idea or your thing, especially not you, Dean.  We'll be buddies who happen to have odd looking jewelry that's permanently stuck on us.  Which will suck for flying."  He looked at Dawn, who was asleep behind her book.  "Long night again?" he asked as he carefully took the book.  Sam came over to help her to the couch in the corner.  She swatted but let him guide her stumbling body that way.  Xander looked at Dean.  "If you want permission to find some busty, young, cute thing, let me know.  I'm not mean, Dean."

"I'll keep that in mind but I don't cheat."

"This isn't your idea.  It's not like I'd expect a commitment thanks to this being done to us.  I'm realistic that way."  He stood up.  "Let's notate the move making thing and then get back to our research."  He walked into his office, waving at Etta.  "We're all good.  Buffy's upstairs taking a nap."

"I saw her.  I started the regional notes."  She handed them over with a smile.  "You looked very nice with the sword, Xander."

"Thank you," he said with a smile.  "Had to teach myself."  He looked it over, adding a few more lines than handing it back.  "To Giles.  Any word from Egypt?"

"Not yet.  They missed their weekly check in."

"I'll call a contact out that way then," he decided.  "The kids still sulking in the office?"

"Yes, Xander."

"Good."  He went in to grab his phonebook, walking out while searching for the number.  He took Etta's phone to call there.  "Pierre, Xander Harris."  He listened to him babble at him.  "Did they win or should we send more help?  I warned him he'd need artillery.  I did when I had to handle one."  Dean gave him an odd look from the doorway.  "Former watcher over Paris."  He went back to listening.  "That's fine.  Tell her I need a sit rep and I'll get her a new watcher within hours if Giles doesn't.  Can you sub?"  He smiled.  "Thanks, man.  Tell her to call once she's awake.  I've got Buffy here but her crew is probably closest if she needs more help or a vacation.  Thank you, Pierre."  He hung up.  "Her watcher died, she's exhausted and beaten up.  She's got a broken wrist but it'll heal pretty well he said," he noted as he dialed the main office.  "Giles, me.  Egypt was fixed by the slayer, barely.  Her watcher ended up beaten to death and she barely beat it too.  Pierre is waiting on someone to sub in.  I've got Buffy here but if she needs a sub, get her one of Buffy's crew?"  He smiled.  "It's going fine right now.  No, that one's solved.  Etta's faxing it now."  She turned to do that.  "There you go.  Let me know who you're sending, Giles."  He hung up and looked at them.  "Dawn told him?" he asked his secretary.

"I told him we were having problems.  Others may have told him as well.  I thought he should be aware that we're having some issues down here that aren't exactly the norm for the council's people."

Xander smirked. "It's a Sunnydale thing but we're all trouble magnets in our own way.  Buffy's got a celebration curse that brings demons.  I find trouble everywhere.  Dawn too.  Willow can be her own trouble sometimes."  He stood up.  "Thank you."  He went back to the library.  "Okay.  Any hope?"

Dean shook his head.  "Not so far.  What did Giles say about this stuff?"

"He said he remembered you being very nice and upstanding.  So if I went with the girls' plan then he'd gladly accept you as an in-law into our strange family.  If not, he hopes that we can at least remain friends since I need more male influences and help down here."

"Do you really think he'd cheat?" Sam asked.

"I'm realistic, Sam.  I'm not built like the skanky ho patrol his daughter seems to think he likes.  I'm pretty sure Dean's never tried gay sex.  Even with the bracelets helping, I doubt it's his thing and I'd hate it to happen because some piece of enchanted metal decides it should.  If it happens, it does.  If he wants to start a real relationship with me, then I'm not going to do more than enjoy it while it lasts.  I know I drive people nuts."  Sam sighed but nodded at that.  "So yeah, I'm seeing problems with even a start being made. If he wants and it's not because of the magic, then I'm not going to do more than be a spoiling boyfriend sort.  That's the guy I am.  But I want it to be real, not because of the magic."

"I can understand that," Dean assured him.  "That's about how I feel too, Xander."

"So you'll figure out if that's what you want and then we'll talk," Xander told him.  Sam scowled.  "I'm more used to my bad girls making the first move, Sam.  I'd have no idea how to do that.  Anya didn't teach me that.  Only how to spoil."

"I've had a few longer girlfriends but nothing like a real relationship.  We'll figure it out together, Xander."  Xander smiled and nodded.  "Then we'll let Sammy hide when Dawn hits PMS and tries to get her own way again."

"Those days, I have a Milky Way in my desk for her," he said dryly.  "It helps keep me unscratched and her unmagiced."  They stared at him.  "Hormones and magic, bad combination.  That's why teenage witches have so many problems."

"Good to know," Dean decided, looking at his little brother.  "I'll help you hide."

"Thanks.  Really."

Xander smirked.  "Now all we have to do is talk to the new judge."  He called the lawyer.  "Set up a meeting with the new judge?  Because the old one attacked me during that incident.  Exactly.  Thank you."  He hung up.  "His helper is there.  He'll help him fix this so it's not a problem."

The Winchesters smirked.  Sometimes Xander turned into a bigger bastard than their father.  But in a cute way.  They could definitely see hanging with this family for a good, long time.  In fact, Dawn was mumbling Sam's name in her sleep so it was all good.  Even if Dean did have to figure out gay sex and Xander.  Right after they figured out how to straighten out their evil little spawns and dealt with D'Hoffryn.

The End.