Xander woke up at the gentle touch to his arm.   It was nice he didn't gasp awake; didn't take a swing at the nurse standing next to him either.  He was proud of himself for that.  "Why am I in a hospital?"

"You collapsed, young man.  They brought you in because you were having some delusions and you collapsed."

"Delusions?" he asked, sounding confused.

She smiled gently.   "It'll be all right.  We know you're not pregnant."

"Never said I was."

"The ER said you were."

"The ER is smoking what sort of crack?" he joked weakly.

"The doctor will be in shortly now that you're awake."  She finished checking his IV then left again.

Xander looked at the bag, nothing unusual in there.  So it wasn't drugs that was making this very odd conversation happen.  Maybe a head injury again?  But no, this wasn't any room in Sunnydale General.   It was bright, sunnier, and had LA's skyline out the window.  "What the hell?" he muttered, making himself sit up.  His head wasn't spinning, it didn't hurt, so no head injury.  Someone tapped once then walked in, making him blink.  No way.  No damn way.

"Sir, I need to ask you a few questions."

"Sure, if you answer one first.  Are you Dean Winchester?"

The supposed Fed in a suit gave him an odd look.  "How did you know?  And does anyone tell you that you look like that guy from that show?"

"What show?  I know when I'm at home, you're a tv show."

The guy blinked.  "Here you're on a show called Buffy the Vampire Slayer."

"No, I had breakfast with Buffy this morning," he said.  He curled up a bit more.  "This is really weird."

"Yeah, it is."  He put up his notepad.  "So, you're really...."

"Xander Harris, yeah."  He frowned then looked around before looking at him again.  "Okay, let's start with a few things.   There's gotta be an explanation.  Date?"

"The twenty-fifth.  Buffy a natural blonde?"

"Hell no," he snorted, but was grinning some.  "This is LA?"  Dean nodded.  "Go ahead and sit, man.  I'm not going to bite.  I'm not Spike or like that."  He let Dean sit on the foot of his bed.  "Why're you in LA?"

"We were on our way back east from dropping something off when I heard a guy on the radio say 'oh, shit, you're a demon' then suddenly go to station break.  You?"

"Cordy's twenty-first birthday.  The whole gang was going to come down for it.  I'm guessing that's why I'm in LA anyway."   They looked at each other.   "If we both think we're in the wrong realm...."

"It's probably magic," Dean agreed.   He shifted some.  "How do you think it happened?"

"I think I want to get out of here and go ask Willow that question, or Anya.  They'd know more if they're here.  Unless Dawn made a wish or something since she practically drools on the show you're on."

Dean grinned.  "I am a handsome devil," he quipped.

Xander gave him a nudge with his foot.  "Beyond that, I need to get out of here.  The nurse just said they were going to cure my delusions and said that the ER said I'm pregnant."

"Really?  That's....wrong on so many levels, dude."  He shuddered.  He couldn't even imagine.

Xander smirked.  "I wasn't as far as I knew last night.  So I'm guessing the magic spit."   Someone opened the door.  "Huh.  Fed.  Charming.  What can I do for you?"

"Mr. Harris, I need to talk to you about what's going on."  He closed and locked the door.

Xander nearly reached for Dean's pocket since he had noticed he was carrying something heavy and that meant a weapon.  "I take it someone has the Initiative's files?" he asked dryly.

"Indeed."

"Then which one of us was displaced," Dean asked.

"As far as I know, it's been merged because yesterday I had no idea who you were, Mr. Winchester, and now I do."  Dean gave him a horrified look.  "By the way, your income generation method?  Stop it.  Before someone catches you."

"Sure, I'll teach him how to rob vamps too," Xander said dryly, staring him down.  "What the hell, dude?"

The agent sighed.  "All I know is that someone figured out that there was a merging of some sort or another here in the last little bit."

"Which one of us was the show before?" Xander asked.

"You were. My daughter watched it all the time," he admitted.  "But on the way over, my GPS system found Sunnydale."  Xander grimaced.  "Which does mean that the Initiative's files are floating around somewhere, yes."

"I need to get out of here."

"Why?" the agent asked.

"Because the nurse said the ER people said I'm pregnant," Xander said.  "And I need to talk to Willow and Anya about what's going on.  That way we can fix it.  Because this is too strange even for me."

"I can cover up that report," the agent assured him.  "We know you were sent in when you collapsed at the Hyperion Hotel.  We know that your friends are there as well."

"And I thought I was having a crappy week when the back loader knocked me down and nearly ran me over," he said dryly.  "Get me the papers and my clothes?  We have *got* to straighten this out before someone gets hurt."  He looked at Dean.  "Why come here?"

"I saw them carrying you out and wondered."  He shrugged.   "Figured it was something strange and possibly related."

"Oh.   Cool I guess."  The nurse came back.  "Can I go home now?"

"The doctor's coming to talk to you, sir."

"Yay me.  Have him come in and tell me why you thought I was delusional and pregnant."

"The ER said you were."

"If your machines said I was, that's not me being delusional.  That's your machine needs fixed," he said dryly.  "Since I was unconscious, I had no idea your machine needed fixed and it's not my delusion."

"The doctor was going to bring in an ultrasound to check for a tumor."

"Good!" Xander agreed.   "As soon as possible so I can go home please.   Because I don't wanna be here when some woman rants and rips the technician apart for your machine being broken."   She walked off shaking her head.   He looked at Dean.   "Do you have things like this happen to you too?"

"Nope."

"Damn."

Dean smirked.   "Freaky shit like this doesn't happen to anyone but you on that show and Sammy."

"Speaking of, is he back with you?"

"Has been for a while."

"So I'm taking it you're post-deal?"

"Um, deal?"

Xander sighed, looking at him.   "On the show, you ended up making a deal to save and bring Sammy back to life," he said quietly.  "After the demon kidnaped him."

Dean growled.  "No, that hasn't happened."   Nor would it be if he could prevent it.

Xander slumped.   "Then maybe we can prevent it for you, Dean."   Dean relaxed at that.   "Okay, have you lost your dad yet?"   Dean gave him a horrified look.   "The demon's daughter attacked you guys.   Your dad did the same sorta thing with *that* demon to save *your* life.   You were in a coma."

"No," Dean said quietly.   "If he does, I'm going to kick his ass."

Xander grinned.   "Seen the skinwalker?"   Dean nodded at that, looking happier.   "Been to Chicago and met Meg yet?"

"No."

"Good!   Then we might have a shot at stopping her.   She's the demon's daughter."   Dean sat up straighter at that.   "The girls watch more religiously than I do, so I'll let you pump them for information in case it's the same here."

"Deal, dude.   Thanks."

"Not an issue.   Things like that piss me off anyway."

"You guys dealt with graduation?"   Xander nodded.   "Initiative?"    Xander grimaced but nodded.   "Glory?"

"Someday soon."

"Have Dawn and know about her yet?"

"Found out recently."

"Then maybe we can help there too."   He smirked at the agent since he was blatantlyconfused.   "Figuring out where in the timeline we are."

"That makes sense.   It's good to see you're both thinking tactically."

"I have to or else I'm going to start screaming about the thought that they think I'm pregnant," Xander said dryly.   The doctor and nurse rolled a machine on a cart into the room.   "Finally!"   He checked under the blanket and Dean hopped off the bed.   He pulled up his gown and pushed the blanket down to cover his naked groin area.   "Go for it, doc.   I want to know why you think I'm pregnant since I'm a guy."

The doctor smiled.   "It's rare but there are a few types of tumors that can cause that problem, sir.   We know it's not testicular.   We already checked those."   Xander nodded once.   "Are you ready?"

"Go for it."

He spread the gel and turned on the machine, letting the nurse plug it in for him.   Then he pulled up the wand and selected a setting.   "Let's start with the general area first."   He put the wand onto the gel and paused.   "Sir, not to be indelicate in front of your friends, but did you maybe have some *surgery*?"

"No.   I was born a guy.   Why?"

"I'm seeing...."   He moved the wand.   "I'm seeing a uterus."

Xander looked at the screen then at him.   "I think if I had a hidden extra part, they would've found it when they went in to do my appendix," he said.   He was going to stay calm.   He really was.   He was also going to gut Willow if this was her doing.    "I didn't have that before and if I remember from high school biology correctly I can't be a hermie because I work.   My girlfriend's already had one pregnancy scare and early miscarriage."

"That is true, hermaphrodites don't usually work," he admitted, flipping a few more switches to look deeper.   "You said you have a girlfriend?"

"And no opening.   You can check if you want."   The doctor did check subtly for him.   "See?"

"So he is pregnant?" Dean asked.

"I'm seeing a small bubble formed in one corner of the uterus," he admitted.   He looked at the young man.   "Do you have any clue?"

"Pollution?" he suggested dryly.   He sighed, calming himself down again.   "Let me go scream and rant at someone, doc.   Please."

He pulled out a metal box from his pocket and handed over a card.   "Call me within a week.   I want to redo your scan then.   That's my office number."

Xander nodded.   "That'll give me plenty of time to think."   And to figure out how this had happened.   Because if he was right, there was nothing he could do about it.   "Thank you."

"A week.   This can't be good for you."   He left, letting the nurse get the machine.

"Can I please have my clothes and paperwork?" Xander called after her.   The agent went to get it for him.   He looked at Dean.   "Don't worry, I'm going to wait until I'm alone to scream and rant at someone or something."

"You're stronger than I am.   I'd already be ranting," he offered.

Xander nodded.   "I need to see if I'm adding Willow to that rant."

"Good point.   You good?"

"Fine for now.   Can I get a ride to the Hyperion?"

"Sure, I can do that.   It's going to be a long night."

"You have no idea but hey, if it was Willow, Anya and Cordy can both help me torture her."   Dean smirked at that, shaking his head.   "Bet me they won't.   My women of snark will rip her to shreds."   The agent came back with his clothes so he went to the bathroom to get dressed.   He came out and signed papers then got into the wheelchair, letting Dean follow him down.   He looked at the agent.   "Tomorrow," he said slowly and clearly.   "Let our geeks talk."

"Gladly."   He left them alone to make a preliminary report.   This was too strange for the government.   He didn't want to know.

Xander looked around.   "No Sam?"

"Local library looking up that radio station.   Get into the front, Xander."   Xander slid in and gently closed the door, getting a grin back.   "You think the girls can tell me more about the demon?"

"Including how to kill it."   Dean gave him such a hopeful look.   "You need the colt."

"What colt?"

"Samuel Colt's colt.   It'll kill any demon.   Your dad and Bobby know about it.   Also, someone *has* to go knock down or fill in the lock mechanism for the devil's gate by Bobby's house."   Dean gaped.   "Yeah.   We'll call later.   Dawn's a bigger fan than I am."

That got a nod and Dean started the car, calling Sam as he backed out of his space.   "Sammy.   Meet me at the Hyperion.   Don't go in without me but meet me there.   It's stranger than we thought."   He hung up on his complaint that it wasn't a real place.   "So, they drool on me?" he asked as he drove.

"Yeah, they do.   And Willow thinks that you're doing your brother but yeah."   Dean snorted, shaking his head.   "Don't worry she won't push you to kiss him or anything."

"Good.   I doubt he'd be any good at it."   He turned on the radio and let the other guy think for now.   He'd be thinking some very bad thoughts if he were pregnant.   And didn't that just beat Sammy's usual luck by leaps and bounds of badness?   He was *so* glad this wasn't his brother having this problem!

***

Xander walked into the Hyperion.   Dean and Sam were talking outside for a minute.   He looked at the people staring at him.   "Why was I in the hospital?"

"You passed out," Buffy said.

"Next time, do what we do for you girls, and put me on the couch."   She flinched at that.   "But that's okay this time because we found a few things.   We're in the wrong world."   Buffy slowly shook her head.   "Oh, yeah, we are."

"No we're not."

"Hey, guys?" Xander called.   They walked in.   "Yeah, we are, Buffy.   To them we're a tv show."

She wobbled but stayed standing.   "You found two actors?" she asked hopefully.

"I'm decent at roleplaying but I'm not dangerous enough for your usual tastes, Buffy.   And don't hit on Sammy either.   He's too fragile for you."   Sam swatted him on the arm.

Xander smirked at her.   "Not actors.   He came up to my room to see what was going on.   Speaking of, they're pre-losing their dad.   They need facts on what's going on.   They can tell us what happened on the tv show here that we are to them."

"Sure," she said weakly.   "WILLOW!"

She came running out of the kitchen.   "What happened?"   She stopped and nearly squealed and pounced.   "You found actors?"

Dean pushed her off him.   "No, he found hunters when I went up to see if he knew anything about the strangeness going on, Miss Rosenburg."   She gaped.   "Here you're a tv show.   Yours and Angel's show both."

She stuttered.   "Not possible," she said finally.

Xander cleared his throat.   "Well, there's other news, Willow.   Seems their ER's bloodwork machines said I'm pregnant.   Would you happen to know anything about that?"   Buffy let out a hysterical sounding giggle.   He glared at her.   "Not.   Funny," he growled.   She passed out.   "And see, we can do to her what you should have done for me.   We can put her on the couch so she can sleep it off."

"We weren't sure if something was really wrong," Willow defended.

"So you left me there alone!" he shot back.

"Oops.   We were coming to visit."

He glared.   "Don't even try lying, Willow.   I know you too well."   She squeaked.   "Now, what the hell did you do this time!"   She turned a bit more pale.   "Willow," he growled, moving closer.   "Dawn's blood involved maybe?"

"I...I was cleaning her scrapes off because one was looking a bit icky.   I was washing my hands in the kitchen sink and grumbling about things," she said, backing away from him.   "I didn't know this was going to happen."   He reached for her but she changed into a mouse and ran off.

Fred shrieked.   "Mouse!"

"That's Willow, don't hit her too hard.   I get to kill her myself!" Xander yelled back.   He looked at the still-stunned Angel.   "Hi again.   Sorry to bring the strange back into your life."

Angel swallowed then nodded.   "It's better we know what's going on."

"That's why I invited them to dinner."

"Sure," he agreed.   "We can order more for them."   He nodded at that.   Then he went to check on Buffy.   She was still out.

Sam coughed.   "Angel, where in your timeline are we?   I know we haven't had the invasion yet.   There's not a lot of slayers so I'm guessing we're pre-Sunnydale falling in times."   Xander gave him a horrified look.   "You don't wanna hear that yet.   Bad shocks for later on."   That got a single nod.   "Have you had Connor yet, Angel?"

"No," he said slowly.   "Am I pregnant too?"

"Wolfram and Hart, dude," Dean told him.   "With Darla."   Angel shuddered.   "How long have you been here?"

"A little under a year," Cordelia said as she joined them.

Dean nodded.   "Has Lilah or whoever figured out the herbs that'll make him slip his soul for a few hours?"

"There is?" Angel demanded.   Sam nodded quickly.   He walked off shaking his head.   "I hope not.   Wolfram and Hart are bad enough."

"Who's Lilah?" Cordy asked.

"She's Wolfram and Hart's secondary hitter after Lindsey."

"Oh.   Charming.   Aren't you two actors...."   They shook their heads.   "Displaced?" she asked hopefully.

"Or we're merged," Sam told her.   "You're tv shows to us too."

"Oooh.   Okay.   Why is Buffy passed out?"

"For the same reason Willow's hiding somewhere as a mouse," Xander said.   "Wesley here?"   She nodded, going to get him.   He looked at them.   "Anything critical we should know before we figure things out?"

"Has Joyce been to see a doc recently?" Dean asked.   Xander slowly shook his head.   "She needs to.   On the show she died of a brain tumor right before you guys took on Glory."

Xander found the phone and called there.   "Joyce, Xander.   I need you to get to LA and go to the hospital immediately.   We have someone who said they think you have a tumor."   She said something smart.   "I don't care, Joyce.   Because I can't hold your girls together if you die."   She sighed but said she'd go.   "Thank you.   We're at Angel's at the Hyperion."  He hung up and called Giles.   "Make sure Joyce is coming to LA immediately, Giles.   We have credible information that she may have a tumor.   She's to come to LA and go right to a clinic or an ER.   I wouldn't trust Sunnydale's hospital for anything this big and you know it.   Thanks."   He hung up then called back.   "You might wanna send Anya this way too.   Tell her it's probably not the best of news.   Because we're merged realms and I'm pregnant," he said then he hung up again.    "That way he can tell her and get his ass beaten for whatever happened thanks to Willow."   He looked at them.   "Anything else rally pertinent at the moment?"

"We can talk about Glory after we figure out what the hell happened," Sam told him.

"Good.   Dawn!"   She came jogging down the stairs.   "Not actors," he said when she squealed, grabbing her before she could pounce.   "These are Dean and Sam.   They need to have a quick rundown of what happened on the show and how and where the colt is."

She nodded, pulling Sam off to the side to get into Willow's laptop and see what she had saved down.   "My favorite fansite is down."

"That's because the realms merged somehow," Wesley said as he came out.   "I'm fairly certain if we check, both shows are now missing."   He looked at Xander.   "You look terrible.   Should you perhaps go back?"

"Not until after I've beaten Willow to death for doing it."   Dawn gave him an odd look.   "Mumbling over the sink while cleaning your blood after that scrape."   She shuddered and shrank down some.   "I know you didn't want me to be knocked up."

"No, you eat strange enough things already."

"Well, yeah," he admitted.   "When your mom gets here, we need to take her to the ER."   She gave him a long stare.   "She's sick if the show's right, Dawnie."

"Shit," she muttered.   Wesley glared at her.   "That deserves some swearing."   She turned back around, finding the things Willow had downloaded.   "Ha, she's back to writing internet smut!"

"Figures.   She used to write it back in high school too."   Xander looked at Wesley.   "How?"

"Magic or a wish."

"I had Giles send Anya down."

"Is that wise?" Wesley asked.

"She was a wish demon, she'd know how to get it fixed or whatever."

Wesley coughed.   "Xander, if it was done that way, there has to be an anchoring spot.   Like if the one she created with Cordelia had gotten her killed, the world would've snapped back into place," he said gently.   Xander gave him an odd look.   He nodded at his stomach.   "It's the most likely explanation.   If we do unmerge them, it'd mean the infant would stay here and you may or may not, and may or may not continue to carry it," he said quietly.   "Depending on how long you were in contact with him.   Even if you should terminate at this point, it may still leave you here."

"Leaving her without me."

"Which would make the world go boom splat," Dawn put in.

"Dean, we have to call Bobby," Sam said.   Dean came over to read and turned pale.   "We have to call Bobby to wreck that or whatever.   However."

"Done."   He pulled out his phone to call him.   "Bobby, Dean.   Small issue, man.   We've been merged with another realm.   Because I'm standing here looking at the unconscious form of Buffy Summers and her little sister is letting us look at the stuff Rosenburg saved down since we're a show to them."   He waited through the spluttering.   "You know where a certain gun is?   A colt."

Xander took the phone.   "Mr. Singer, Xander Harris.   There's a colt made by Samuel Colt himself.   Has Latin down the barrel.   Can kill any demon?   They need it *now* because that demon is going to kidnap Sam to open the devil's gate somewhere near your house."   Bobby said something.   "A mile wide devil's trap around it?"

"Ash knew," Dawn said.   "Ellen told him after they blew up the bar."

"Dawn said Ash knew, that he had told Ellen and she came to see you after the demon had the bar burned down."   He nodded.   "That'll work.   Yeah, we're working on that.   No, I think it's our side's fault," he admitted.   "She's hiding as a mouse though."   He heard what he said and shuddered.   "If so, we'll deal," he assured him.   "Thank you for letting us know.   No, we have Dawn but we've got to face Glory soon.   That's what we've been doing.   Also, you might wanna warn their father if he's heading for Chicago?   The demon's daughter is up there and she's going to try to kill him and Dean.   We can definitely share, Mr. Singer.   Not an issue.   We'd never let that happen to another person.   It's wrong.   Agreed.   LA at the Hyperion for right now.   Since Sunnydale's around, we'll be back there soon I guess.   Thanks, man.   No, this is his phone.   Thanks."   He hung up and handed it over.   "He thinks he knows where it is and he'll call Ellen after he calls that person."   Dean relaxed, nodding some.   "And yeah, he'll see if he can find your dad too.   That way you don't lose him."

"Thanks."

"Shouldn't have to happen to anyone, Dean."   He looked at Wesley.   "How can we be sure if it's a wish or not?"

"We can do a few telling spells but I might need Willow's help."

"She's a mouse and Fred yelled that she had seen her."

"I'll find her then," he said, looking grim.   He glanced at Dawn then at Xander.   "How do we think this happened?"   Xander leaned closer to whisper in his ear, getting a shudder.   "Oh, dear lord."

"Think how I feel," Dawn quipped.   Sam patted her on the back with a grin.   "So, do you really get into stuff that only Xander could do?"

"Yup," Dean said dryly, making his brother swat him again.   "Sammy, track that down while they work on the telling spells."   He nodded, taking Dawn to work with.   He looked at Xander.   "Let me guess, Bobby went on his usual rant about what happened to witcheswho went that bad?"   Xander nodded.   "She and this guy Rack were getting *real* friendly.   Not carnally friendly but real friendly."

"Rack?" Angel said as he came out of the library.   "I know him.   Why are we talking about him?"

"He and Willow are buds," Dean said.

Angel paused to look at him.   "The magic dealer?"   Dean nodded.   "Hell."

Xander sighed.   "How bad?"

"Warren shot Tara trying to kill Buffy and she went to pull up some statue or temple or something and nearly ended the world," Sam said.   "That's after Glory and that stuff though."

Xander sighed.   "I should hear all of this.   Buffy!"   She snapped awake.   "Naptime's over with.   We're working on the whys.   Could use some help."

"I can tell you what I remember," Dean assured her.   "Sammy's getting what they remember about our show."   She nodded, pushing her hair back and taking him to the library to talk quietly.

Xander looked at Angel.   "When Joyce gets here, I'll take her off to see about that thing.   Can you ...."   He waved a hand at Dawn's head. That got a nod and he walked off again.   "Okay."   He went to get a drink and find Cordelia.   "Hey.   I thought it was only Buffy that had incidences on her birthday."   She swatted him but she was smiling.   "At least it doesn't look like a mini apocalypse."

"No, hopefully not.  It might even be more helpful.   What're you going to do, Xander?"

"First we need to find out of it's related.   Wesley said if it was a wish or something like that, I'm stuck this way."   She nodded once.   "If not, then we'll figure it out."   She gave him a short hug.   "Thanks.   I had Giles send Joyce down for an ER visit and Anya to help since she'd know.   Think if I'm stuck like this, you and she wanna help me with Willow?"

She smirked.   "Count on it.   That kid will be *rotten*."   She walked off feeling better.   Xander had that effect on people.

Xander went to wait outside for Joyce, smiling when she got there and got out to glare at him.   "Do not give me that look for taking care of you so I don't have to adopt your younger daughter."   He took her keys.   "C'mon."

"You can't just go to the hospital and ask for a CT or something, Xander."

He smirked.   "There's ways around that.   Get in.   They're working on the current problem."   She nodded, but got in with a sigh.   He got in to drive, taking her to the clinic he knew about.   Halfway there, Dawn appeared in a flash of light.   "Magic bad," he said dryly.

"Not my doing," she complained, trying to pull her arm out of the portal that had brought her there.   "Give it back!   It's my hand!"   He handed back his dagger and she stabbed at the thing holding her arm.   She finally got it free and the portal disappeared.   "I don't know what that was."

"Freaky shit from the merging.   Tell your mom what's going on while I find this place."   He hoped it had come too.   It wasn't in the usual spot but it was up the street.   He parked and got them out and inside.   "I know it's late but can she be seen very quickly?   I doubt it's not something he'll have to send her on for."

"Is it an emergency, sir?"

"We have a seer who's attuned to the family who said she has a brain tumor."   Dawn was clutching her mother to hug her.   "She's been right before."

That got a nod.   "Let me see if the doctor's still here."   She went to do that then brought Joyce back to a room.   The doctor examined her and asked her some questions that she hadn't been putting together.   He wrote her an order for the CT and Xander took them to the local hospital.

Xander smiled at the radiology receptionist.   "Is there a hope that we can get her in tonight?" he asked, handing over the order.   "We have a young woman who loves the family who has been proven right before who's been seeing her having a brain tumor."

The nurse gave him an odd look.   "Proven right how?"

"She saw her daughter nearly dying and me saving her.   About five other times too."   That got a shudder.   "Since she's had repetitive visions of Mrs. Summers having a brain tumor, I'm being pushy.   Is there an opening tonight?"

"Let me see if we have one."   She went to talk to her supervisor.   Things like that were weird but they knew not to discount them.   She came back.   "We have an opening in about an hour during the ER saved time.   It's the beginning of rush hour so she might have to wait a bit but we'll see if we can sneak her in."

"Thank you.   Caf?" Dawn asked.

"Downstairs and to the right."

"We'll bring it back up," she promised, taking Xander's wallet to go down there.   Her mom needed something to calm her down.   Dawn was good at finding that sort of thing.   Xander sat with her until she got back then Dawn got to cling some more.   They finally brought Joyce in and she clung to Xander instead, getting a hug and a kiss on the head.   "What do we do if she is sick?"

Xander looked at her.   "We find her a very good doctor."   She nodded at that.   He went to talk to the receptionist.   "If she's right, who do we get her in to see?   Do you have any recommendations?   We're from just outside of town and our hospital is pitiful in the extreme."

"We're not supposed to do that but I do.   We see a lot from this practice," she said, writing down a name and number for him.   "They're very pushy about treatments and using the latest things.   If they can't, they'll be able to help you find one."   He grinned and nodded, taking it back.   Joyce came out a bit later and they went back to the hotel.   "That poor family," she sighed, shaking her head.   She hoped that person was wrong.

***

Joyce walked in and let Xander carry in the food he had stopped to get.   "Mom?" Buffy asked.

"They'll call in a few hours, once the radiologist has read the CT," she said.   Buffy hugged her.   It made her a nice daughter sandwich filling.   "It's all right.   Xander got the nurses to give him the name of a good practice here in town.   They can hopefully find me someone good."

"They're one of the best in town," Xander said.   "They're supposed to be a bit pushy about treatments and things too."   The girls smiled at that.    "You're not going to see some quack in Sunnydale, Joyce.   You need to see someone good.   The group can't take another death."   She nodded at that, sitting down with her girls.   He saw the look on Dean's face and sighed.   "Bad?" he hissed at him.   Dean told him in a whisper in his ear.   Xander moaned, sitting down to hold his head.   "Wonderful.   Can't happen.   I won't let it."   They grinned at him.   "I got food!" he yelled.   He pulled out his and gave Dawn hers, her mother's, and Buffy's dinners.   "There, go snuggle and talk."   They went to find a place to do that, Wesley showing them up to a room.   "Thanks, Wes."

"They could use the privacy and comfort," he said.

Cordelia looked at what Xander was having on his burger.   "Now I know you're pregnant."

"I always have them like this," he defended.   He ate a bite.   "It's good.   Try it?"

"You might be contagious."

"If so, let's hope it doesn't spread to us," Dean said dryly.   "I don't think I could take Sammy puking and getting fat."

"Why him?" Cordelia asked with a mean smirk.

"Strange shit only happens to Sammy.   I don't have near the level of strange shit he does."

"Gee thanks," Sam said dryly.

"No wishing," Angel said before he could retort.   "We have enough of that problem.   Harris, Anya's on her way down?"

"She's a former wish demon.   Who else would know all the ins and outs of what happened

and what we can do about it?"

"True, she was a vengeance demon," Cordelia agreed.   "I didn't tell you about my wish verse?"

Angel gave her an odd look.   "Eaten by shoes?"

"No, I had wished Buffy hadn't shown up.   It was nice; Xander was the Master's right hand, torturing you, all that good stuff.   That's how we got skanky leather Willow too."   Angel let out a soft whimper.   She just grinned.   "Could be worse, could still be going on."

Xander snorted.   "No thanks.   I'm happier this way than I ever was when I tortured Angel."   He looked at the vampire.   "Though it is nice that you lightened up some."

"Had to.   I was getting depressed.   I even told him bad jokes like you told me," Cordelia said dryly.   She dug into the bag until she found hers.   "Regular?"

"Mayo.   I wasn't sure if you were having an anti mayo day so you can scrape if off if you are."

"That's fine."   She took it back to go back to her research.   She could have her presents later.   Xander wouldn't forget her birthday.

Xander looked up as Anya stomped in.   "Hey."   She paused then looked at the Winchesters.   "We think somehow Willow merged the two realms."

"Uh-huh.   Then why call me?"

"You know about this stuff since you used to create them too," he pointed out.   "Did you bring Spike?"

"He's been lurking all day," Wesley said as he came out.   He got his own food and smiled at her.   "Can you explain how things like this are anchored if it was a wish?"

"Probably.   I'm not sure if we can undo it or not though.   We'd have to find the anchor."

"Yeah, about that," Xander said, chewing his present bite of burger.   "I'm apparently carrying the anchor."

"It's on you?"

"It's in me."

She blinked.   "That much energy would warp a body."

"I'm guessing that's why they found a uterus," he said dryly.   "And a lump."

She stared, then pulled him up to look at him.   She huffed.   "Where is she?"

"Find out what happened first," he said calmly.   "Then you and Cordy can help me torture her."   She walked off and he sat down then got up to look at his chair.   "I think that's my other one."   He took it out to check then nodded and ate it.   Dean gave him an odd look.   "Not like smooshing is going to matter."

"No, probably not.   You're going to let them torture her for you?"

"My women of snark can warm her up for me," he said dryly.   "Then I can make evil Angelus look pleasant."   Angel shuddered.   "You would be too."

"Yes I would be," he admitted.   "Connor?"

"With Darla," Sam agreed.   "They brought her back."

He shook his head.   "I don't want kids."   He walked off to help find the Willow mouse.   He wanted this strangeness stopped.   It was too much for him to handle anymore.   Xander always brought the strangest things to make his head hurt.

Xander grinned at the boys.   "They have good ideas?"

"Many," Sam promised with a grin.   "So, how do we know whose it is?   I mean, is it Willow's?   Is it whoever she was thinking of?   The demon's?"

"I don't know.   Hey, Anya, who's the baby's parents?" he called.

She came out of the office.   "I can check when I ask D'Hoffryn what happened."   She stared at him.   "I'm not happy, Xander.   I don't want to be a stepmother."

He shrugged.   "We'll see what's going on," he said bluntly.

"Fine."   She went to find the stuff she needed to summon her former boss.   He wasn't going to be happy about it but oh well -- she had a pregnant boyfriend!

***

Anya reappeared in a dim flash of light.   "D'Hoffryn is very unhappy with the demon that did this."

"Can they undo it?" Xander asked.   "Since it wasn't a real wish or through some loophole?"

"Possibly if they were still alive but D'Hoffryn threw a fit on them."   She sat down, staring at Xander.   "It's whoever she was thinking about at the time and yours."

"Okay," he said a bit too calmly.   "Anything else we can do?"

"He suggested we do something to the hunters to make them retire since the higher ups are demanding that they be stopped."

"Fat chance," Dean told her.

"I wouldn't do that anyway," Xander told him.   He stared at her.   "And?   You're not glowy?"

"He said that this being done to you isn't me being scorned.   It's you getting assaulted basically and if I'm that shallow he has no idea how I did my job for centuries."   She sniffed.   "Though I still don't want to be a stepmommy."

"Then we'll work that out," Xander assured her.   She nodded, walking off to tell Wesley and the others.   He looked at them.   "We'll find that out from Willow."

"Go rant at God and her," Dean told him.   "You're about to snap and I don't need to see the breakdown.   Hate to embarrass you, dude."

Xander nodded.   "Thanks, guys.   See you in the morning."

"You can all have rooms too," Angel promised.   "Third floor, Xander.   It's more private."  Xander nodded, heading that way.

"Thanks, Angel.   Cheaper than the usual," Sam said with a small grin.   "Anything we can do to help right now?"

"Not yet."

"Then we've got to find our father and call him."   He and Dean went out to the car to sit inside for some privacy.   Sam tried first.   "Dad, it's Sam.   We have credible, relevant information on the demon.   We're in LA but it's not out here.   Call us in person immediately please?" he said into the voicemail.   "Before you set foot in Chicago since his daughter's up there."   He hung up and handed the phone back, finding his external speaker system.   Dean gave him an odd look.   "It'll send it through the car's speakers.   That way we can both hear and you don't have to translate."

"Fine.   This time.   Still woosy."

"Whatever."   The phone rang.   Sam pushed the button.   "It's us."

"Boys?" Bobby asked.

"Hands-free set, Bobby.   Is Dad near you?"

"Missouri actually.   She called earlier and said she'd get him immediately and have him call you two.  That's why I was expecting your call earlier."   He groaned a bit.

"You okay?" Dean asked.

"Bit bruised.   Had a transmission fall on my leg earlier."

"Ow," Dean agreed.   "Any luck on the other stuff?"

"Ash does know where it is.   He and Ellen are going to look it over tonight.   Hopefully they can destroy it."

"Hopefully," Sam agreed quietly.   "If not, we might need help with the apocalypse."

Dean nodded.   "Definitely."   They heard a door slam in the background.   "That Dad?"

Bobby's voice faded away from the phone.   "About time we found you.   I've got the boys on.   You check your voicemail?"

"That's why I stopped in here," he said, coming closer.   He apparently took the phone.   "Boys?"

"We're both on Sammy's hands-free set, Dad," Dean said.

"How did you find this information?"

"We were coming back from dropping something off for Caleb.   The DJ on the radio said 'shit, you're a demon' then went to station break so we were local looking at that when I saw a guy who looked a lot like the guy on that Buffy show being taken by ambulance from the hotel where they filmed the Hyperion for Angel's show."

"And since we know there's no spinoffs or anything being done," Sam said.   "We figured it might be relevant."

"I went up to question him.   Turns out he is Xander Harris, the two worlds are merged and we're just as much a show to them as they are to us.   So we have what happened there and so far it's proven to be right."

"In their timeline of the show, we've already killed the demon and lost you, and are on the way to losing Dean," Sam finished.   "So we're working on that.   They're just pre-Glory.   We just found Joyce's brain tumor by telling them."

John let out a sigh.   "How bad?"

"Let's see, his daughter attacked us after nearly killing me," Dean said dryly.   "You made a deal with the thing to save my ass when I was stuck in a coma thanks to a Reaper," Dean said.

They could hear the shudder.   "They know what the demon is?"

"I know it's name and all that," Sam agreed.   "Dawn and the ladies watched the show before patrol.   Dawn's got major fangirl stuff and Willow was doing 'net writing about the show so she had some stuff saved down for easy reference."

"Interesting.   How did this happen?"

"Wish," Dean sighed, rubbing his face.   "We've already sent Anya to ask her boss to see if they can undo it and they can't."

"All right then," John said.   "Where is the demon?"

"Gathering people in Cold Oak," Sam told him.   "He's weeding down those he touched so he can have a champion that'll open a devil's gate for him."

"Devil's gate?"   Bobby said something; they could barely hear him.   "That's good to know.   I'll check with Ellen if she doesn't show up here."   He licked his lips or did something wet sounding.   "Now what?"

"Now, we don't go to Chicago since his daughter's up there and we need the Colt," Dean told him.   "If we have it, we can kill him and her, Dad."

"Good.   Are you two okay?"

"A bit freaked out but I'm really glad Sammy's not the switch's anchor since the poor guy who is is now pregnant."

"That's bad," John said.   "They can't....."

"Doing that would unmerge the worlds and still probably leave him here," Sam said.   "It's in Xander."

"At least it's not your freaky luck," John decided.

"He's ranting at God right now," Dean agreed. "Stayed calm all evening, I'm impressed."

"Me too.   The witch?"

"We told them all we remembered so they can get her help," Dean said.   "She was muttering about stuff over the sink while cleaning up from cleaning a few scrapes on Dawn's arm."

"Instant wish demon fodder," John groaned.

"Yup," the boys said together.

"Anyway, they're going to stop her once they find where she's hiding as a mouse," Sam added.   "For right now we're merged and the government does know about hunters since they have the Initiative's files running around somewhere in the system.   I'm going to talk to Willow about how to reduce our files maybe."

"That'll be good," John decided.   "Anything else I need briefed on?"

"Not yet," Dean said.   "We were gonna stay here through at least tomorrow to see if we can help.   We know Sunnydale came with them.   We think it's a full merge, Dad."

"Good to know.   I'll work on getting that colt.   Then we'll see about Cold Oak, boys."

"Let us know," Sam said.   "After all, he wants to keep me, Dad."

"Why?" Dean asked.

Sam sighed.   "The night he killed mom, he dropped a few drops of blood into my mouth.   He's done it to a lot of talented kids born the same year I was."   Dean gave him an odd look.   "He did.   There's at least ten of us but some of us are already dead thanks to his weeding out.   That's why I'm getting the visions."

Dean nodded slowly.   "Uh-huh.   Can we baptize this out of you or something?"

"No," John said.   "I figured he had done something but not what."

"And the show we were had a few complications like Ruby and a few other hunters," Sam told him.

"I've heard about Ruby," John admitted.

"She's demonic," Sam told him.   John moaned.   "Trying to work on our side, maybe.   I'm not sure why she's being a hunter, Dad.   So let's just be careful about her since the show was saying that she had an idea about how I was going to save Dean from *his* deal."

"His?" John demanded.

"You made one with Azazel to save him.   He made one with a crossroads demon to bring me back to life after I got killed at Cold Oak."   Dean shuddered.   "In the timeline of the show, we were working on that."

"So it's important that you don't go face down Meg alone," Dean ordered.   "Since she's his daughter."

"Hold on, we have a name?" John demanded.

"Azazel," Sam said.   "He needs a champion to open the gateway and lead Hell's armies."

"Shit," John said.

"Basically," Sam agreed.

"You need to go rant at him later," Dean ordered.

"Already started.   Feel lucky no one's a telepath inside," Sam said dryly.   "Though, Cordy and I did talk about having visions."   Dean rolled his eyes.   "Hers are killing her, Dean."

"Hers come from a different source than yours though, right?" Dean asked.

"We think so.   We're working on that."   That got a nod.   Then another shudder.   "So we'll see.   Where do you want us to meet you in a few days, Dad?"

"Stay close to that area, boys.   If Rosenburg did this, they're going to need help if we can't undo it.   We don't know what sort of differences there are."

"That's what we had planned," Dean agreed.   "At least for a few days and to see if they wanted help with Glory since Buffy didn't want to set off the First Evil stuff."

"If she dies, we'll have to hide the body," Sam told him.   That got a nod from Dean.   "And then make sure Willow's getting help."

"Definitely," Dean agreed.   "You'll be safe and take Bobby, Dad?"

"Sure, boys.   I can do that.   Thanks for the info.   Be careful.   Sunnydale seemed to be nastier than New Orleans or New York."

"Of course we are," Dean agreed.   "If Sammy gets turned, he's getting a soul restoration spell immediately," Dean said dryly.   Sam punched him on the arm.   "It's your freaky luck, Sammy, not mine.   See you soon, Dad."

"Love you too, boys."   He hung up and turned to look at Bobby.   "That's so screwed up."

Bobby nodded.   "Definitely but it's good to know.   So far everything we've known ahead about the other people's timeline has proven correct."

John sat down, considering it.   "Do we have anything on this demon?   Sammy got the name so we can look it up."

"What's the name?"

"Azazel.   He wants Sammy to lead his armies when he opens the gates."

"Charming but Sammy's too nice.  Dean I could see, but not Sammy."   He found the books he needed and handed one over.   "The colt's coming."   John relaxed.   "Dean told me what happened to him so he's running it this way.   Ellen and Ash are looking at the devil's gate.   We'll know soon, John."   He nodded, relaxing again.   They got to work researching over a beer to keep themselves calm.   "Think one of the boys will fall for Buffy?   If I remember right, Sammy crushed in the first season."

"Sammy said Dean needed a girl like that," John admitted.   "I'm not sure if even Dean's tough enough for her usual thing though.    Still don't see how she slept with Spike.   Or Angel."

"Who knows," Bobby said with a small smile.   "They said earlier Dawn was fangirl over the show, she nearly drooled on Sam."   John smiled at that.   "She was a good girl."

"She's still too young.   How long before Glory are they?"

"At least a month.   They just told them about the brain tumor so they took her to the hospital today to have it checked."   John nodded.   "So we'll see."   They shared a look and got back to work.   John made notes of what had been said, handing them over.   "Cold Oak.   Haven't heard anything about that place in a while."

"He's bringing other kids he tainted like Sammy there to weed them down to one."

"Then we've got a good area to stop him in," Bobby decided.   He went to get books on that subject while John took the other ones to go over.   It was his family's curse to deal with.   Bobby was just the backup this time.

***

Angel looked at Xander the next morning.   "Go down to the basement.   It's shielded and quiet," he said calmly.   "That way you won't keep anyone up or worry about them hearing you."

"Willow?"

"Human," he told him.   "We found her about three."

"Who was she thinking of?"

"I don't know yet," he admitted.   "I'll ask her."

"Do I smell off?"

Angel sniffed then shrugged.   "I don't remember your scent that much.   Spike?"   He came out of hiding.   He had heard most everything already.   "Does he smell off to you?"

Spike sniffed then nodded.   "Smells fruity and ...."   He sniffed again.   "Bloody hell how did that happen!" he demanded, backing up.

"Willow.   Can you tell if the father's scent is on it yet?"

"Not yet," he admitted.   "When it's older."

"That's fine," Xander agreed.   "Just wondering."   That got a nod.   "I'm going to the basement.  I didn't get to scream and throw a hissy so I didn't wake anyone up."   He went to do that.   He had to get it out of his system.   He didn't have time to be angsting over this problem with Glory going on.

Angel looked at Spike.    "We have no idea what we're doing yet."

Spike snorted.   "Could rip the realms apart if the thing's touched."

"I should get Lorne to see if he can sense anything about it since it's the anchor," Angel decided.   "Buffy will be heading home tonight, Spike.   Go home."   He walked off.

"Sure I will," he said dryly, heading down into the tunnels to hit a few friends' places in LA.   Some owed him money, some he wanted to see about the stupid chip in his head.   Before the witch did something else wrong and he ended up really married to Buffy this time instead of nearly there with the will spell.

***

Lorne walked in, looking at Xander.   "You look like crap, sugar plum."

"I know," Xander agreed.   "Feel like it too."   He looked at him.   "You're Lorne, right?   Cordy wrote about you."

He nodded.   "I am.   Angel told me what's going on.   I know he said you can't sing."   Xander snorted, shaking his head.   "Hum for me?   He's worried it'll be an apocalypse in the making."   Xander hummed and he frowned.   "Two ways it goes," he said.   Xander quit humming.   "If something happens to her, you're stuck here.   She'll never win against her next real battle.   What they saw for Buffy will happen and Willow won't be able to bring her back.   The rest of the lines are gone through like tissue for another few centuries."

"If I do keep her?   It's a girl?" Xander asked.   The green skinned demon nodded.   "Did you see a name?"

"No.   Sorry, sweetcheeks."   He smiled.   "She's a little hellion.   Cute little thing but totally normal.   No magic, no sucking in like you do.   Has Spike wrapped around her finger and all that."   Xander grinned a bit, ducking his head.   "And Buffy doesn't die.   Sam Winchester doesn't die.   Their apocalypse is stopped too.   She'll have it a bit rough.   You're a target thanks to what you do so she will be."   Xander nodded once at that, toughening up again.   "It'll happen a few times but nothing major."

"No slayer mole?"

"No.   No slayer mole.   Terribly normal.   I only saw a few years into the future.   Didn't look all the way."

"No, that's good to know.   Did I have to have her cut out?"   The Host nodded at that, giving him a look.   "Making sure since somehow I grew a funky uterus."

"Probably couldn't happen without it.   By the way, the Powers are *pissed*."

"Not in their game?" Angel asked.

"Not an idea on their board," he told him.   "We're talking hair standing on ends, mumbling, and pacing pissed.  Pissed like a fourteen-year-old girl before the major dance of the year with a huge zit she can't pop or cover up for anything and a dress that makes her look fat and sweaty pissed."

"Not our fault she made an accidental wish," Xander pointed out.   "Though I'm still going to beat her for it."

Lorne laughed.   "I'd do it too."   He patted the boy on the head.   "While you're pregnant, any skills you have could come out," he said quietly.   "More than just sucking in spirits."   He looked at Angel.   "I've got to open the bar.   See what else is being said."

"Please.   Thank you."

"Thank you," Xander agreed.   "No idea on the father?"

"It's the one she was thinking of when it happened."   He left.

Xander went to find where they had chained Willow up.   "When you accidentally made the wish, who were you thinking about?"   She gave him a dirty look.   "I ask because it's my daughter's father."

"No one."   She looked at him.   "We can snap it back."

"Then I'd be staying here, Buffy will die with Glory, and you won't be bringing her back," Xander said.   Willow slumped.   "Beyond that, it's nice to have people you can talk to when the hunting wears on your sleep."   He made her look at him.   "It may've been an accident but I'm seriously pissed at you, Willow.   What were you mumbling about?"

"About how it was unfair that we girls had to do a lot more of the work."

"You try working full time and then slaying," he said dryly.   She slumped again.   "Not like you do more than go to four classes a week and half the time you call off those.   I work every day for at least eight hours and then come to listen to you girls complain about your lives being hard and then go patrol with you.   You should try it."   She shook her head, looking down again.   "What else were you thinking?"

"Why does it matter?"

He leaned down.   "Why merge us with their realm?" he asked calmly.   She went pale.   "Now, who were you thinking about?"

"I said it'd be nice to have some other hunters on the hellmouth, people who could help us with the big stuff."   She moaned.   "That's why we're here."

Xander nodded.   "That's what I thought you'd say."   He went to find Wesley in the library.   "Are there two lines holding an anchor or only one?"

"Two," he said without thinking then gaped.   "The other parent?"   Xander nodded.   "Do we know who?"   He looked outside at the car then at him.   "You're sure?"

"She had been complaining about needing more hunters on the hellmouth because she needed a day off and we needed more help.   She was thinking it was unfair how much of the work they had to do since I'm working full time."

He snorted, shaking his head.   "She's a bit spoiled."

"How do we cure her magic addiction, Wes?   I'd ask Giles but I think he's got a bit of experience with it from somewhere.  I'm not sure he won't give her sympathy instead of a kick in the ass."

Wesley looked at him.   "You give her a mentor to start.   You make sure the mentor can weed out her excess magic.   How did they do it on the show?"

"The Devon coven."

"I know of them.   I can send them an inquiry."   Xander nodded at that.   "Are you going to be all right?"

"I'm still wanting to beat her to death," he admitted.   "I'll handle it.   Thanks, Wes.   We'll get out of your hair tonight or tomorrow."

"In this case, it's not an issue.   We needed to know and having you here did cheer Cordelia up immeasurably."

He grinned.   "She can go shopping to match the earrings I got her.   She said so."   He left, going to check on his family.   "Wesley knows the coven the show used to help her with her magic addiction," he told Buffy in her ear.   She looked at him and nodded.   "Did we hear back?"

"We've already called for an appointment.   They take new patients in on Friday.   She's going in at three."

"That's fine.   I was going to head back home tonight or tomorrow.   Gotta hit work."   She grimaced.   "I have to pay my bills somehow, Buffy."

"Good point.   Well, if you and Anya broke up, at least you'll be able to save for when you have to hide."

"Her.   It's a her."

She smiled.   "Slayer?"

"No.   The Host, a demon Angel knows, said she's perfectly normal.   Even more normal than I am.   No sucking in or anything.   He did say if I had any powers, they're coming out during this."   She grimaced.   "More than just being possessed from what he said."

"We'll watch out for freaky Xander behavior," she decided.   He nodded at that.   "So you're going to...."   She waved a hand at his stomach.

"Have to or you'll be there without me.   It'll happen like they said through Glory and then change when she can't bring you back."   She shuddered.   He nodded.   "And it could rip one of the realms apart.   I can't have that on my conscience when I'm here."

"Good point," she agreed.   "Thanks, Xander."   He nodded, giving her a hug.   "And for being pushy with mom."

"I don't want to have to adopt you and Dawn."   She smiled, batting him on the arm.    "We're cool.   I'll head back tonight or early tomorrow."   She nodded and he went to call his boss since he hadn't called off yet.   "Hey, boss, big shock but I can't get in today.   No, I was unconscious.   No, not drunk, boss.   Like they took me to the ER yesterday and I'm barely awake.   Funky machines that said I'm pregnant."   His boss snickered at that.   "So I'll find out soon.   I'll be in tomorrow, hopefully on time since I'm still in LA at the moment.   Thanks, man."   He hung up.   "That way if something happens on site, he knows enough to tell the paramedics," he muttered as he walked off.   He did have to start making plans on how to support himself when he couldn't work.   There was no way he could continue to work up to his due date.   Not in construction.   Too much lifting.

***

John saw the Impala park a few days later, nodding at his boys, giving them a hug when they got closer.   "You two okay?"

"Still a bit freaked out by Xander," Dean admitted.   "He's down to planning what they're going to do about his pregnant times."   John shuddered.   "If not, it could rip the realms and Buffy would definitely die.   I can't do that to another hunter and neither could he."

"That's fine.   Any other good news?"

"The Devon coven is very upset with Willow," Sam said with a mean grin.   "They've sent one out to work with her.   Since they know Glory will go after Tara, they're leaving her in LA for a few weeks.   We're going back to help with that."

"We can all go," he promised.   That got a nod from his boys.   "Do they have it until then?"

"We hope," Dean agreed.   That got a nod.   "We have it?"   John opened the case to show them.   "That's a beautiful weapon."   He ran a finger down it.   "Is he in there?"

"We're pretty sure he is," John said.   He nodded at Bobby, letting them hug him too.   "We a go?"

"We're good," Bobby agreed.   The Winchester clan snuck into the ghost town, going to free the prisoners and then deal with the demon.   It felt Sam enter the town and came for him.   Dean had to save Sam and their dad shot it.   Yup, they had been right, the demon died.   Dean spit on the remains then looked at his brother.   "You okay?"

"I'm fine," he promised calmly.   Bobby splashed him with holy water.   Nothing.   "See?   You worry more than the brooding vampire did."   He walked off to help his father talk to the people there in the town.   He did get him away from the one bad guy there.   She was going to cause problems since she wanted to be the chosen one.   They got her tied up and the others freed by the time Meg got there.   Meg let out a scream and went for Dean.   Sam took the gun and shot her too.   She died and it was over.   They looked around the town because it was nearly night.   They decided not to risk it and went back to the cars and the local motel.   It was time to celebrate a few things.

***

Xander came in from work a few weeks later, finding Anya still huffy in the store.   He gave her a look.   "Have you figured out yet if you're staying or not?   I'm too tired to be anything but blunt."

"You didn't patrol last night," she reminded him.   "And we didn't have orgasms."

"No, I'm working a second job now and then to save money for when I'm going to pop," he told her.   "Not like I can keep working construction when I'm too big."

She grimaced.   "Oh.   No presents?"

"Not until after she's out."

"She?"

"Lorne, a demon Angel knows, told me it's a girl.   Totally normal girl."   He leaned his hands on the counter, staring at her.   "If you're not staying, I've got to move to save money."

She nodded.   "I can understand that.   It's cheaper if I stay."

"That's fine.   That's up to you but you have to start paying your share of the rent."   She grimaced.   "Tough.    I can't afford it anymore, Anya."

"Fine.   We'll talk about it later."   He nodded, going to get a bottle of water from the back room.   She considered it.   It hurt to have Xander so close yet in the other bedroom.   Since she had broken it off, he had every right to expect her to move.   If she had broken up with him, she'd expect him to move out.   Though the lack of spoiling would make her pout for a good, long time.   She went to talk to her friend Hallie.   She'd know what to do.   She had charmed more men through the years than Anya had.   That's how she found out what Xander's second job was.   She showed up later that night at the store, giving him an odd look.   "You're stripping?"

"I make decent enough money," he said dryly.   "More than I do working construction.   I can do it until I start to show."

"Ewww."

"No one there knows, Anya."

"Fine."   She pouted.   "Hallie thinks I should move out."

"That's up to you but you still have to pay your half of things."   She slumped.   "I can't afford to keep you."

"You could loot some of the nests we take down," she offered.

He gave her a look.   "I'm already doing that," he said dryly.   She nodded at that.   "So, anything else?"

"No.   I'll... I'll move out this month."

"If that's what you want."

She looked at him.   "It's just too painful to see you every morning over your eggos."

He gave her a kiss on the cheek.   "It was your decision, Ahn, not mine."   He walked off, heading to go on patrol.

"The first time you get hurt, Mister, you're off patrol," Buffy said firmly.

He looked at her.   "Not like it'll save me from them coming for me," he said dryly.   She squeaked.   "I got offered a few nights at the demon club stripping for money.   They think I smell good."   He strolled off with a smirk.   Buffy was shuddering and mumbling about needing a big brush and some soap.   Score!

"Eww!" she said finally with a full-body shudder.   "That's disgusting, Xander!"

"Yay.   Gotta make money somehow, Buffy."

"Still gross."   He grinned back at her.   She sighed, catching up to him.   Maybe she'd ask Spike how Xander could make some extra cash.   After all, babies took things.   A lot of things.   Things she'd have to find a job to pay for so Xander didn't strip at the demon club if they didn't find another way to fund the baby's needed stuff.   Like adorable outfits and stuffed animals.

"Wanna help me move when I find a cheaper place?"

"I can do that.   Slayer muscles are very handy for moving," she said dryly.   "Why are you moving?"

"Less expenses if I do."

"Oh.   Anya moving out?"

"Yup.   She didn't want to pay half."

"I guess that makes sense."   She moved up to walk beside him.   "Where's Willow?"

"England."   He gave her a look.   "The Devon witch threw an unholy fit with Giles."   She snickered.   "Oh, she so tore him a new one," he assured her.   "Then she ripped into Willow.   I was listening to the phone and you could hear crying and screaming."

"Good.   Maybe it won't happen again?"

"Can't happen again unless she pulls another world into this one."

"What would happen if you didn't.... you know?"

"I'd be there, whatever Dean told you would happen without me being there."

She shuddered.   "No thanks.   That sounded really bad.   Especially the pulling me back from a few months of death this time thing."   He gave her a one-armedhug around the neck.   "Mom's going to be okay?"

"You're sending her to the best in the city," he reminded her.   "If not, we can go swear at the Powers together."   She smiled slightly.   "And I'll watch out for you two."

"Good.   Because I'll be kinda out of it if something happens."

"Of course you will.   That's normal."   She nodded, giving him a squeeze back.   "It'll be okay."

"Can I be an auntie?"

"Sure."   He smirked.   She laughed.   "You can change all the diapers you want too and even help me burp her."

"Her?"

"Lorne, the Host, said that it's a girl," he reminded her.

"Did he see a name?"

"Nope.   Pity because I know I'll screw it up somehow."   She swatted him but spotted a vampire so they went to stake and go on.   It was just another patrol night.

***

Dean drove into Sunnydale Thursday, calling the new phone number he had.   "Hey, Buffy, Dean and Sam.   Where should we hit to meet you about five minutes from now?"   He smirked.   "Where's that?   Never been here before."   He nodded, turning that way.   "Pink?"   She said something and he rolled his eyes.   "Sure, we can do that.   See you in five or so."   He hung up.   "They're at the Bronze."

"I think it's the only club in town," Sam said.   "You tell her Dad was coming?"

"I will when I see her.   He won't be here until tomorrow."   He shrugged but found a good parking spot and got out.   He saw a demon with drool.   "Do *not* think about drooling on my car, dude.   I will shoot your ass."

Sam looked at him.   Then at the people watching them.   "Dean's a bit possessive about his car."   The demon stared.   Sam grinned and wiggled his fingers.   "Rosenburg."   The demon ran off screaming something in his native language.   A lot of demons ran for the city limits.   Sam grinned at Dean.   "Need a better shower, Dean.   Obviously you stink."

"Shut up, Sammy.   You're the one with ugly hair and no muscles on your oversized, ugly body."   They walked toward the club.   The bouncer gave them an odd look.   "Cover's how much?"

"Um....   Weren't you on a show?" he asked quietly.

"Our fault," a male voice called.

"Crap.   Five each."   Dean paid and they went inside.   He went to find a church.   Sunnydale had forty-three, he could find one that had open doors he was sure.

Dean strolled up to get a beer from the bar and found where Buffy was dancing and Xander was lounging at a table with high chairs.   "Hey."

"Hey."   He smiled at Sam.   "Go save her from the incubus?   She wouldn't let me help."

"Sure."   He went to save the slayer from the dirty sex demon she was taunting.   "Hey."

"Hi, Sam."   She moved closer to him.   "How do you do them?" she hissed in his ear.   He smirked at the demon and winked.   She smiled at him.   The demon huffed off.   Sam threw something on it and it screamed and leapt off, running out of the building.   "Holy water?"

"Yup."   He led her back to the table.   "So, what's going on with your insanity situation?"

"The coven was not happy with Willow.   They screamed at Giles."

"Good!" Sam said.   He got his own beer and came back.   "What's up with the other one?"

"She's holed up changing her clothes," Buffy said.   Dean gave her an odd look.

"Unfortunately she's got minions that go steal Gucci for her," Xander agreed.   "She changes clothes more than a teenage girl with an unlimited credit card."   They groaned. "She spent all day dealing with wardrobe issues.   Finding the perfect outfit to suck her world onto ours."

"Some girls are all about the fashion," Buffy agreed.   "I like to look cute when I hunt too."

"We go for easily washed," Dean told her.

"Mom can get goo and slime out of nearly anything," she assured him.   "Do we have any idea how to do things with her?"

Dean nodded.   "We know how it worked the last time."

"Good!   Then maybe we can do it sooner."

"We can only hope," Xander agreed.   He belched.   "Sorry.   Dinner."

"It happens," Buffy assured them.   "He ate on the run before patrol."   They nodded at that.   "Of course, he'll have to stop patrolling soon."   She stared at Xander.

"Yeah, when I'm too slow to stake."

"When there's a chance of baby lock in there getting hurt," she countered.

"We can ask a few of the females we know who hunt when a good time to stop is," Sam assured her.   "They should know when the best time is."

"That'll work for me," Xander agreed.   "Unless there's an emergency."

"That's a good point," Dean agreed.   "Emergencies are different and I'm sure you can find a safe way because I know you're a stubborn bastard, Xander."

Buffy looked at him.   "You have *no* idea."

Dean smirked.   "Yeah, I kinda do."   She laughed.   "What's up for tonight?"

"Finishing patrol.   Going home.   Mom's got her appointment tomorrow."

"Go," Xander said.   "They can have my couch and stuff."   She nodded, heading home.   He looked at them.   "Anya probably won't be home tonight.   She decided to move out.   She's probably off sulking with Hallie."

"That's cool," Dean assured him.   "Two couches?"

"Or I can take the couch if you guys wanna share my king sized bed."

"We'll figure it out," Sam promised.   That got a nod.   Xander led them back to their car and showed them the way to the his place.   Sam walked in and smiled at Anya since she was in the kitchen.   "Xander said we can crash for a bit."

"That's fine," she agreed.   "It's his place now."   She nodded at Dean.   "You too?"

"Where you see one Winchester, you usually see the others," he said dryly.

She snorted.   "I'm not happy with this."

"Yell at Willow," he said dryly.   "Make sure she's not going to end me, but go ahead and yell at her."

"I did before they stole her."   She grimaced.   "Need my room already?"

"They can have my bed tonight," Xander promised.   She smiled.   "Have a good night, Ahn."

"You too.   Where are you going if you're not staying here?"

He shrugged.   "I'll start looking tomorrow."   She nodded, going to her room.   Dean gave him a look.   "Gotta save some money for when I can't work."

"Didn't think about that."

"Should've seen Buffy's face when I said I got offered a spot at the demon strip club."   Sam gaped.   Dean laughed.   "Yeah, it was kinda like Sam's face."   He got his pillow and blanket then settled in on the couch.   "Alarm clock."   He went to get it too.   "There you go.   Bathroom's on the other side of the kitchen."   They nodded, going to call their father and settle in for the night.   Xander had to work in the morning.   The guys could learn the town tomorrow.   Hopefully Buffy could get some hunters in to help her with patrol when he was incapacitated.   Or maybe their father if he was at loose ends.   Though he might rub her the wrong way and they'd get slayer fits.   He let himself sleep because he was exhausted.   This baby was going to kill him.

Later on, when Sam woke him up by moving, Dean got to kick him.   It was always a fun game when they had to share a bed as kids.

***

Dean met his father at the coffee shop the next day.   "Welcome to Sunnydale, Dad."

"It's a charming little town."   He looked around.

"It is.   Xander's at work.   Buffy and her mom are at the doctor's for the first appointment.   Giles is going to open the Magic Box in about an hour.   Sammy's getting food; we're going to eat in the local park with a map."

"That'll work."   He went inside to get his own coffee and followed Dean to the park.   "It's a pretty little area," John said as they walked.

"If you didn't know it's got thirteen or fourteen cemeteries and a hellhole under the former school," Sam agreed as he joined them.   He handed his father food.   "I figured you'd be here."

"Psychic friend's hotline?" Dean asked.

"Heard one go running screaming 'they're all three here'," he said dryly, sitting down on the bench.   John laughed.   "It's not bad looking food."   He opened his to sniff then ate a bite.   "Pretty decent."   Dean dug into his breakfast too.   "What's up for today?"

"Scouting her headquarters," Dean said.   That got a nod.   "Waiting for everyone to gather again after that."

"Where is it?" John asked.   Dean pointed across the street.   John looked.   "What are those?"

"Her minions."

"They're ugly little things."   He dug into his breakfast.   "Who's the blonde?"

"Glory," Sam said, glaring when she stared in his direction.   "Remember, watch her fingers.   She can suck sanity."   A car came around the corner and hit her, making her shriek at them but the person fled smoking.   "Huh."

"Very," Dean agreed.   He ate another bite.   That had annoyed her more than they ever could.   When they got finished with breakfast they broke to take separate watching spots to watch what was going on.    They needed a good plan to deal with her.

***

Dean walked into the Magic Box later that afternoon.   "Xander, we've heard you can find bigger things around here.   How true is that?"

"The Mayor had a stash we can borrow from if we have to.   Why?"

"How big?"

"Not horribly so."

"Less or more than the mall?"

"Less.   Barely less.   Next class down."

"Damn.   Okay.   Then I need to hit some contacts."

Giles gave him an odd look.   "Why are we on this subject?"

"Glory.   Have to get her back to her host's body and then do it," Dean told him, looking around.

"Two of the college's witches are in the back by the herbs," Xander said.   He held up his magazine.   Sam took it to flip through until they were alone again.   John walked in.   "How was your day?"

"Not bad.   Not much excitement.   Who hit her?"

Xander shrugged.   "Haven't heard anything about that yet.   Spike or Clem can find that out later."   That got a nod.   The witches checked out and they were alone.   "Are we thinking about blowing her to hell and back?"   Dean nodded.   "Could work."    He shrugged.   "I'll have to check the warehouse.   They might've moved it and it'll take someone a few hours or so to find it again if it's still in town."

"That could work," John decided.   "How plugged in are you?"

"Spike's more plugged in but a lot of the locals respect Buffy and by proxy us."   That got a nod.   He winced and shifted.   "I'm not liking this."

"I don't blame you," Sam said.   "Pain?"

"Yeah.   Shifting pain."   He winced.   "It's not a happy feeling."

"You're sick?" John asked.   "Should we plan on not having help from you?"

"If you stick two realms together, something's got to be the pin holding in place," Dean told him.   "It stuck in him."

"So he's sick," John said.

"No, I'm pregnant," Xander said.   John gaped.   The boys had told him but he thought it would've been solved by now!   "Just barely pregnant.   And I'm not happy.   She's not happy."

"How?" John asked.

"The magic did it," Xander said dryly.   "If we fix it, then I'll be stuck in your realm and ours can be destroyed.   So yeah, I'm pregnant.   It's a girl according to a source of Angel's.    The doc said it was just a little lump so far."

John shuddered, then turned and kicked the wall.   "I'm sorry, kid.   Any idea who the kid belongs to?"

"It's mine and either Willow's or whoever she was thinking about at the time.   No idea which until around my fifth month.   Spike said he might be able to tell the scent but probably not until after she's born."   Because he wasn't wanting to face down a furious new grandfather today.   It was already a bad day.

"What's the other option?" Dean asked.

"Whoever she was thinking about when she was mumbling over the sink and made the accidental wish," Xander said, looking at him.   "No clue, Dean.   If so, I have a daughter.   If not, I have a daughter."   He stared him down.   Dean glared.   "It's probably hers.   We'll know in about five months."   He wouldn't be saying anything else about it because he didn't want to crimp their lives or obligate anyone to deal with his f-ed up life.

"Fine.   If so, we wanna know."   John gave him an odd look.   "Why merge *our* realms, Dad?"   John glared at the boy.   "Not his doing.   He nearly smacked a nurse for telling him he was pregnant."

"It's magical backlash," Xander said.   "Not like I pounced them into bed.   Right now I'm leaning toward it being hers since she makes a lot of mistakes.   Anya was too and she's nearly an expert on these things."

"If so, I want to know too," John told him.

"Uh-huh.   The other parent first."   John nodded at that.   "But if and when it's time, it's going to take surgery.   Just in case you're around then."   John nodded once.   "Thanks."   He looked over as Dawn came in.   "How was school?"

"Sucky.   How was your day?"   She gave him a hug.   "They're at the doc's."

"I know."   He let her cuddle.   "She'll be fine."

"We hope."

"She'll be fine because she knows I'll turn you into a tough, biker, Faith-like chick if I have to adopt you."   She grinned and went into the office to help Giles.   "Her mom's got her first oncologist appointment today."   That got a nod.   He checked the clock then leaned back.   "Did you skip?"

"Yes.   I'm too scattered to be in class.   The teacher sent me to the principal and she agreed."

"Fine.   You tell your mom, not me."   He put his feet up again.   "Okay, we're due for another attempt at her trying to find it.   Sam, now."   He looked outside then ran to the office to get Dawn and head off with her in John's truck.

Glory stomped in by blowing in the door.   "Where is my key!" she demanded.   She hauled Xander up to get into his face.   "Where is it!" she shouted.

"Let me down," he snarled.   "Before you upset my baby."   She gaped then burst out laughing.   So he kicked her and got free.   "Thank you!   Morning sickness is already hell."  He grabbed something and threw it at her.   "You've wrecked the store three times.   You haven't found it yet.   Where do you think it is?"

"Where's that slayer brat?"

"Her mother's at the doctor's.    She'll be back tomorrow."   He smirked.   "It's still not here."   She shoved him and he hit the wall with a groan.

"Hey!" Dean shouted, opening fire on her.   She shrieked and lunged for him but he ducked and got out of the way.   John got her next.

"How dare you ruin my clothes, you upstart little humans!" she shrieked.   She went for him.   Xander hit her with something solid across the back of the head.   She shoved him into the wall again, knocking him out this time.   She sneered and went for Dean.   Dean pulled up something and she looked.   "What's that?   Prayer beads?   They won't help you."

"Plastic explosives, bitch.   More than enough to blow your ass back to your host."   She backed up, then ran from the store.   "Dad?"

"Going.   Get him."   He followed her to make sure where she headed.

Dean checked Xander over.   "Fully out of it."   He slapped his face a few times.   "Hey, you in there?" he asked at the groan.

"Must I be?" he whined.   He got helped up.   "Where did she go?"

"She didn't like plastic explosives."   He helped him to standing.   "Can you get something now?"

He stared at him.   "If you tell Buffy I'm dead."   Dean shrugged.   Xander went into the basement and came up with a wooden box.   "C'mon."   They walked out together.   Xander handed John the box and opened it with something in his pocket, then sighed and pulled something out, handing it over.

"Not in your condition, kid," John said.   He let Dean take the heavy weapon while he plucked out another one.   "How do we do this?"   It grew in his hand.   It was a nice way to store weapons.

"She goes back to her host or not," Dean said.   "If she does, she's vulnerable."    Xander dropped the box and took off jogging to stop the cops.   Dean and John moved out of sight and John fired on the building.   She came out of the wreckage and came for them.   Dean fired his and got another one when it only made her pause.

"I'm a goddess, don't you get it?" she sneered.

Dean blew a missile into her at close range, sending them flying and her flying.   Sam got her when she was down.   "What are you doing here?" Dean groaned.

"I got her somewhere she said was safe."   John came over to take the machete and finish the job.   Sam couldn't kill anyone, he could.   "Eww."   He walked over to check over Dean.   "You okay?"

"I'm good," he said, checking himself over.   "Dad?"

"Sore but I'm fine."   He looked at the boy, who was babbling at the cop.   "What is he saying?"

"That Willow and Anya prayed and made him pregnant.   He's sharing the good news."   They walked over to get Xander.   "Hey," Dean told the cop.   "It's not his fault his girl was a pain."   He walked Xander off to check him over.   "You okay?"

"I'm fine.   I wasn't doing anything dangerous."

"Good point."   He closed the box and handed it back.   "There's a few left."

"Thanks."   He tucked it under his arm.   "Let's go hide.   She still here?"

"Nope.   We think she's gone."   That got a nod and they went back to the store.   "Dawn?"

"At her friend's house hiding.   I'll get her."

"Sarah or Sandy?" Xander asked.

"Sandy was there.   She squealed her name."

Xander found his phone and called.   "We think it's safe.   Bring cookies or something?"   He hung up and flopped down in his seat.   "We think it's good," he told Giles.   Giles gaped.   Xander stared back then pointed at the Winchesters.   That got a smile from him.

"Where did that box come from?" Giles asked.

"Clem."

"Why?"

"Because shit happens around here," Xander reminded him.   "Sometimes it comes in handy and the local reserve base is now closed."   Giles walked off shaking his head.   Xander shrugged.   "He doesn't like any weapons beyond swords."

"It happens," John said.   "We all have our favored weapons."   He sat down.   "Ice packs?"

"Kitchen's back that way," he said with a point.   "Ready-packs are in the freezer."   He and Dean went to get some.   Xander relaxed, looking at his stomach.   "We'll have to see what happens."   Someone walked in and stared at him.   "What?"   The guy stared then bowed slowly before leaving.   "Thanks," he called, looking confused but he did wave.   "Huh?"

"Maybe that rant you gave to the cop got around," Sam told him.

"Maybe.   I doubt any kid of mine would be a saint though.   I'm definitely not."

"Well, girls do say being pregnant is a religious experience," John said as he came back out.   "Was that someone who bowed?"   Xander and Sam nodded.   "Interesting.   Are you sure you want the whole town to know?"

"If I'm collapsed on the ground I want the paramedics and cops to know before the local ER does something stupid to me."

"Fine."   He sat down.   "They could target you."   Xander shook his head.   "They might, kid."

"No they won't.   They all know I know how to blow things up."   John flinched.   He stared back.   Then he grinned.   "Last month we got to take down the remains of the school.   Wasn't as pretty the second time," he finished quietly.   Giles made a horrified noise.   "She wreck something major this time, Giles?"

"No.   Did they know, Xander?"

"Some of the survivors do still live in town," Xander reminded him.   Giles walked off moaning and shaking his head.   Again.   "Not my fault!   The boss asked!"   He got comfortable again.   Dawn came in with brownies.   "Thanks."

"I called Buffy.   She said it's good that she's probably gone."   She sat down next to him, then gave the Winchesters a hug.   "You deserve brownies.   And dinner.   Can I make you three dinner?"

"It's fine, Dawn," Dean said with a small grin.   "We don't need medals."

She swatted him on the shoulder.   "You should have some.   I don't care if you don't usually get them.   How often do you go up against something like her?"   She stomped off.   "We're having pork chops tonight.   Xander, make sure they get to the house by dinner time."

Xander waved a hand with a grin.   "She will pull you there by your ears if you try to stop her from fussing.   She learned it from her mother."   Sam snickered.   "She did.   And she will.   Trust me."

"White house?" Dean asked.   Xander nodded.   "We can find it in a few hours."

"Good."   His phone rang.   "Harris."   He listened.   "That's good news though, right?"   He nodded.   "That's even better news.   No, Dawn just announced she's making them dinner even if they don't want her to," he said dryly.   "Pork chops.   Sure, I'll have her save you a plate.   Let me know when she's out of surgery, Buffy.   Well, we went 'splody for it and they handled it since they decided I'm too delicate too."   John glared at him.   He stared back.   "Then they got her point blank range and Sam and John got her host.   Yeah, so we're fairly certain but I can have Spike check after dusk.   Let me know how it goes.   Sure, you can see if you can crash on Cordy's couch.   I'm sure she won't mind since it's about your mom.   Let me know what I can do to help, Buffy.   I can do that.   Thanks, dear.   No, not at my place but I'll go stay at yours since I'm putting up the clan.   Thanks."  He hung up and called their house.   "Dawn, I'm staying over tonight and Buffy said to put her a plate in the fridge for tomorrow.   No, she's going to immediate surgery.   They found a bubble place from what she said and it'd cause more problems.   Then they'll start outpatient treatments for the tumor.   She'll try to camp on Cordy's couch tonight.   Sure, I'll be there after dinner.   That's fine.   I'll see you then."   He hung up.   "If you don't like cabbage or broccoli, let her know now."

"We're decent on those," Dean said, shaking his head some.   "It's nice to get thanks."

"It is," John agreed.   "But a bit strange too."

"Her sister's involved in the same field, guys.   She has to watch what her sister goes through every night on patrol."   That got a nod from them.   "So clean up and head over.   I'll have Spike check the wreckage later.   Maybe we can save some of the fancy clothes for Buffy."   They smiled and went to do that.   "Spike!" he bellowed.   The vampire came up from the basement.   "Once it's dark enough, make sure Glory's dead."   He nodded at that.   "Buffy's staying with her mom tonight.   They took Joyce to immediate surgery for a weak spot bubbling up on her vein."

"I can do that.   What'll you be doing?"

"Looking for a new place to live," he said dryly.   Spike just walked off shaking his head.   "The extra money's got to come from somewhere.   It's this or stripping at the demon club."

"It's a bits and pieces place, whelp.   You'd have to show it all."

Xander shrugged.   "Not the first time, Spike."   Spike gave him a horrified look.   He shrugged a bit.   "When you're broken down....."   Spike walked off shuddering.   Xander went to get the paper to look through.   All the deaths meant that Sunnydale had a good bit of cheap apartments ready to rent if you'd put up with the blood stains or cleaned them up for the owners.   He could clean blood very well.   That wasn't a problem.   "Hmm, stairs," he said as he looked.   "Am I going to be able to do stairs?"

"Probably," Anya called from the office.   "Most pregnant women have balance problems but not that bad from what the website said."

Xander went to look at those.   He apparently needed to know these things now.   Better to find out this way instead of bugging or creeping out new mothers.

***

Xander walked onto his job site the next morning yawning.   "What is wrong with you?" his boss demanded.

Xander looked at him.   "I was kept up helping Dawn cry.   Her mom's in a hospital in LA with a weak vein and a brain tumor."

"She okay?"

"They did surgery last night and now they're going to do outpatient treatment.   Buffy's with her so I'm watching Dawn."

"I can put you on part time this week, Xander."

Xander shook his head.   "I need the money and I get off right after she gets out of school so it'll be okay."

"You sure?"

"I'm fine.   Really."

"Why do you need the money?"

Xander stared at him.   "You don't want that headache."

"Your girl?"

Xander snorted.   "No, we broke up because the ER's machines were right."   The guy blinked.   "Someone prayed really hard that I'd understand them better."   He gave him a look.   "So, in about six months, I'm going to go on temporary leave."

"You shouldn't be here now.   Too much lifting."

"It's not even tadpole sized," he promised.   "When I'm ordered to, I'll quit."   That got a nod.   "I've got a doc in LA that found the lump."

"Good.   At least you're seeing someone.   You really are?"   Xander nodded.   "Aren't you freaked out?"

"Incredibly but my two day rant at God and her Goddess left me being practical.   I know I'm going to have a few months off in there.   That's why I'm moonlighting at a second job at the moment."   That got a nod of understanding.   "And why I can't afford part time now, boss."

"That's fine but the first issue you have, I need to know.   I'm not going to let you be hurt.   How's it coming out?"

"Surgery with drugs."   The guy grinned.   "So I'm keeping it a bit quiet but I kinda went hysterical on someone yesterday.   Someone bowed to me."   He grinned.   "Let me check my crew in."   He went to do that.   "Morning, guys."

"Morning, Xander."

One looked at him.   "Is the rumor I heard true?"

"Someone wished I'd understand them better."

The guy shuddered.   "You good?"

"For now.   Give me six months."   That got an understanding pat on the back.   "I'm fine for now.   When I'm not, I'll go watch daytime tv."   That guy smiled.   "Okay, where are we today, guys?"   They pointed.   "Is that wire in right?"   He went to get the plans and came back.   "Box is in upside down or wired upside down."   He let them see and they got to work correcting it then went on with the job.   Xander put the plans back and got to work beside them.   A few gave him sideways looks.   "I'm fine."

"If you're sure."

"You see me collapse, I've got a doc in LA.   Do not let Willow or Anya have me treated."

"Fine," the ones who had heard agreed.   Mentally they were shuddering.   He was *way* too calm about all this.

Xander grinned at one.   "It's not so bad.   I'll get a long vacation."

"And no sleep for months on end."

"I'm moonlighting right now.   What's the difference?"   They groaned and got back to work.

***

John looked at his boys.   "We should stay for a few days," he decided.   "Cover while Buffy's gone and Xander's down."   They nodded at that, giving him 'duh' looks.   "You were going to?"

"Yup," Dean agreed.   "And be back here in five months too."

"It's probably not," John told him.

"Better safe than to have a midnight phone call," Sam told him.   John rolled his eyes.   "Tough, Dad.   By then he'll probably need someone to talk to who's not female and hormonal.    Plus it'll let us check on them."

"Fine."   He walked off shaking his head.   "Where is Xander?"

"Construction site of the new high school," Dean told him.   John shuddered.   "Exactly."   He saw a shy blonde girl and smiled.   "Morning, Tara."   She flinched and stared around until she spotted him.   He waved her over.   "If it's all right with you guys, we'll be staying for a few days to cover while Buffy's gone.   That way things don't get out of hand.   That good with you guys you think?"   She nodded quickly, looking down.   He tipped her face up.   "Dad's that mean, not me, Tara."   He grinned.   "Don't worry about it.   Worry about Xander and his nighttime job."

"Wh...why?" she stuttered.

"Because he's making extra money for when he can't work," Sam told her.   "Moonlighting at the Phoenix Club."   She blushed bright red.   "Exactly.    You have them call us if there's problems, okay?"   She nodded quickly.   "We'll be hanging out here in the sunlight.   You go play.   It's not that often you get weeks without homework in college."

"The local one is for shit," Dawn said as she joined them.

John stared at her.   "You're cutting classes?"

"Yeah."

"No," he said.   "Your mother would be pissed, young lady."

She stared at him.   "I'm not yours, Winchester.   You can't pull daddy duty on me."

Dean called Xander's phone.   "It's me.   Can Dawn skip today?"   He handed the phone to her, watching as Xander chewed her a new one.   He winked at Tara.   "Go play.   Sammy's right, you need to play since your apocalypse was stopped."   She nodded, grabbing Dawn and walking her back to school first.   She gave Dean back his phone on the way to the Magic Box, going to report to Giles for the day.   "If she had more confidence she'd be a woman like Missouri."

"Yes she would be," Sam agreed.   John snorted.   "She would be.   She's very forceful when she needs to be."

"Uh-huh.   Why is she that shy?"

"Her parents need to be test subjects to see how bad medieval torture really was," Sam said dryly, staring at him.   John shuddered.   "I'd gladly volunteer for that."

Dean looked at him.   "Do you have PMS, Sammy?   You're not usually this violent unless you do."

"I'm still a guy, Dean.   I don't get that.   No matter how many times you tried to convince me that I'd have a period some day when I grew up, I don't."   He walked off shaking his head.

Dean shrugged but his father swatted him, hard.   "What?"

"Quit picking on your brother, Dean," he sighed, going to find some coffee.   It was a nice little town if you discounted all the demons.   Though the one at the coffee place had a good touch with the creamer apparently.   Sam was chatting her up about something when he got there.

***

Joyce came home to find the house messy.   "Dawn?" she called.

"Dawn, can't you pick things up?" Buffy complained.   "Mom doesn't need to clean up after you."

"I'm sorting laundry.   Shut up, Buffy."   She hopped down the stairs.   "This way nothing turns pink that's not supposed to be pink."   She gave her mom a hug.   "Give me another hour and it'll all be done, Mom."   She bounced into the kitchen, coming back with a microwaved mug of tea and some toast.   "Here, you nibble while I work on the laundry.   Tara and Xander went grocery shopping last night for me so I can help with dinner too."   She bounced off again.

"I thought only Xander bounced that way," Buffy said with a frown.   Her mother snorted but looked happier.   "You want me to make the couch up, Mom, or would you rather I help you up to bed?"

"I'm fine, dear."

"Bullsnot!" Dawn called from the kitchen.

Joyce laughed.   "She's very hyper today."   She sipped her tea.   "Did you add honey?"

"You needed a bit of sugar for extra energy," Dawn said as she came out to get the next load of wash.

"Why are you only doing three things at a time?" Buffy asked.   "The washer is bigger than that."

"It's your gooey clothes."

"Oh.   Thanks."

"Welcome.   John's at the Magic Box waiting on you.   They stuck around to cover for you for a few days."   Buffy nodded.   "I can invite them to dinner if you want."

"That'd be too much for tonight.   Once Mom's in bed I'll go check in that way.   How's Xander?"

"Way too calm but he told people that Anya or someone had wished him pregnant so he'd understand women better.   Some of the demons have bowed to him.   He's freaking out majorly but not letting it show in public.   He's at work right now."   She bounced off again.   "Buffy, your plate's still in the fridge.   I defended it from the walking stomach, Dean."

"Thanks, Dawnie."   She went to get it and heat it up for herself and make sure her mother ate something at the same time.   Someone knocked so she answered the door on the way back.   "Hi, Mrs. Simmons.   Is there a problem?"

"I was wondering if you knew that Dawn was entertaining a few older men, dear."

"They were helping watch her while Mom was in the hospital in LA."

"Oh.   That explains that so much better."   She smiled.   "Is your mom all right?"

"No but she'll get there."   She let her in and went to eat on the couch, then got up to make her mother a nest on the couch and put her into it, tucking her in even, then taking the chair to eat in.   Their neighbor smiled but was giving a glowing report on how good Dawn had been.   "Xander said he'd stay over."

"He did, all but last night."

"Last night Xander was off handling something and couldn't get here before I went to bed," Dawn said as she rejoined them.   "Mom, the green and purple is the blue box, right?"   Joyce nodded.   "Just making sure."   She smiled.   "I'm so not running a brothel, Mrs. Simmons.   I'm not that sort of girl."   That got a smile and a pat on the cheek.   "The guys are a dad and his two sons who know my sister through a former job."   That got a nod.   "Xander had them checking on me when he couldn't be here."

"That's fine then.   Just making sure that your mother knew, dear.   You can't be too careful about some teenagers.   Not that I think you have that little sense but you never know."

"I know," Joyce agreed.   "Thank you for telling me, Gail."   That got a smile.   "I'll be fine.   Some running back and forth for treatments but otherwise I'll be just fine."

"Good."   She stood up.   "I'll let you recover and tell the others that it's all right."   She left, going to spread the new gossip.

Xander came in the back door, shaking his head.   "At least they don't think that Dawn offed you anymore so she could throw wild parties and make money the old fashioned way."   He gave Joyce a hug.   "Need more tea?"

"I'm fine, Xander."

"You sure?"

"I'm fine."

He stared at her.   "If you're not fine, I have to adopt your girls.   They'd be very warped and into anime within weeks."   He grinned sweetly.   "Then Buffy wouldn't get to wear the slutty clothes and Dawn would never date and all that neat stuff."

She sipped her tea.   "It'll be all right.   Calm down."   He grinned.   "How are you feeling?"

"Still creeped out by the people who came to bow at my stomach."   He settled in next to Buffy's feet, stealing a bite of pork chop.   She swatted at him.   He grinned.   "The town's calm.   They saw John and Dean and ran for the hills.   The cops are ignoring them totally too.   Sixteen vamps came up while you were gone but we handled patrol very well.   John said to get her settled and he'd brief you later when you were ready to let Dawn fuss for a while since she fussed terribly over them."

"Made them all sorts of dinner, cookies, and stuff," Dawn agreed.

"Skipped school twice and John tried to dad her but it didn't work," Xander agreed.   "Tara and I handled it."

"Mom, he threatened to spank me," Dawn said.

"You skip school again and I will spank you," she promised, staring at her younger daughter.

"I was too worried to concentrate."

Buffy looked at her.   "You can only skip school if you're going to hunt bad things, Dawn.   Otherwise you end up working on Xander's construction crew for life."

"Fine.   I still managed my homework.   I'm actually ahead since I've got that paper due next week done."

"Good," Joyce agreed.   Dawn gave her a hug then went to check on the laundry.   "She's clearly had too much chocolate."

"We're so bouncy to wear you out so you have to nap," Xander told her.   She smiled at that.   "Because you have to nap or you won't get better.   Or so my grandmother told me when I got sick."

"I'm going to rest soon," she promised.   She nibbled on her toast and tea, settling into her makeshift bed for now.   She let herself drift off, not feeling Xander taking the mug and plate for her.   She was really tired.   Surgery did that to her.

Xander nodded for Buffy to go while he lifted her up and put her onto her bed.   Dawn came up to tuck her in and then he took her out to wear out her bounciness.   Buffy got a shower and changed clothes then went to the Magic Box to talk to John while he finished making Dawn calm down in the backyard.   By the time he was done, they all needed naps but that was fine too.   Joyce would appreciate that later on when she needed them.

***

Buffy walked into the Magic Box.   "Xander's got Dawn to calm her down.   Mom's in bed.   What happened?   That's way too many vamps for this time of year."

"A new master moved in and was making guards," Sam told her, handing over his notes.   "We got them all for you."   She beamed at that, giving him a pat on the shoulder.   "We did a good patrol through all the cemeteries while you were gone.   Dean's off winning a herd of cats at the moment with Spike and Clem.   Clem's kinda odd and he creeps Dad out but that happens I guess."

She smiled.   "Clem's a nice guy who has a deep love for kitten poker."

"So he showed us."   He smiled.   "How is she?"

"Doing okay.   They got all the nasty stuff out and fixed the weak vein area.   She'll start going to treatment later this week twice a week for chemo to make sure it doesn't come back."   He nodded at that.   "Xander was right, they're really good and pushy about getting her treated immediately.   Mom's insurance loves them too so it's all good for us right now."

"Good.   I'm glad your mom'll be okay, Buffy."

She smiled.   "How bad was Dawn?"

"She fussed *so* badly," he offered with a grin.   "But she was worried.   The night Glory got destroyed, she made us dinner and threatened to pull us there by our ears if we didn't show up on time."   Buffy grinned at that.   "She was okay.   Worried and stressed but okay."

"Good.   She's hyper right now but I guess that's normal."   She looked around.   "Any word on Willow yet?"

"Not that anyone's told us."

"Damn."   She went to find Giles in the basement.   "Any word on Willow yet?"

"Not yet.   How is your mother?"

"Better.   Twice a week she's got treatments but otherwise she'll be okay they said."   He smiled and nodded, giving her a hug.   "Is Glory really gone?"

"Yup, sure is," Dean agreed as he came up through the sewer entrance.   "Spike even looted for you so you have some new things.   Or he's keeping them for himself but he'd look really sucky in that shade of pink."

She gave him such a horrified look.   "That's a bad mental image I didn't need, Dean.   Eww!"   He laughed and patted her on the arm.   "Thanks."

"Not an issue."   They walked upstairs together.   "Xander better?   He was bouncy earlier."

"He's wearing Dawn out so she quits bouncing."

"Figures," Dean agreed.   "Maybe she'll make him quit wearing such loud shirts."

She shook her head.   "We've all tried."

"I don't know, I think I look good in some of them," Xander said as he came in through the back entry.

She frowned at him.   "That's not Xander.   Xander feels funny to me now but he feels even more funny," she hissed to Dean.

He nodded once.   "Some of those shirts are really gross, Xander."

"Well, yeah, but they're cheap slime fodder."   He shrugged.   "You do what you gotta do."

Sam frowned.   "You're not Xander."

"I am so."

"Are you pregnant too?" Dean asked.

"Eww, no!"

"Then you're not Xander, dude," Dean assured him.

"He's pregnant?   I don't want to be in anyone's skin who's that freaky!" he complained, starting to peel himself off.   "That's disgusting.   That did not come through in his mind."

Dean found something and stabbed the demon.   "Shape changer," he told Buffy.   "We need to get the skin off him before they think Xander's dead too."   Sam peeled it off for him and Dean got the hands.   The cop that came in to look at the body gave them odd looks.   "Dead, loose skin."

"What're you doing with it?"

"Presenting it to the real Xander," Buffy said with a grin.   "He'll feel proud."   She called.   "There's a not-you here."   She hung up.   "He'll be right down."

"You guys deal in more strange stuff than even we do," Dean told her.

"It's the town."   The cop saw Xander walk in and gave the body an odd look.

Xander looked too.   "That's not one of my shirts.   I don't have that pattern."   The cop shuddered and stomped out.   "Think you wanna take the not-me with you?" he called after him.   "Before I have to get sick or something?"   The cop came back with people to take the body then they left.   He shook his head.   "She's napping on the couch, Buffy."   He yawned.   "Spike said he saved you some of her clothes so you didn't have to shop for a while."

"Shopping is good stress relief," she complained.

He looked at her.   "You need a new boyfriend."

"Duh."   She batted him on the arm.   "Maybe Dean and Sam know some cute hunters?"

"Not that many," Dean admitted.   "Dad might.   He knows more people than we do."

"We can ask Bobby to put it around too," Sam agreed.   Buffy smiled at that.   "Hopefully we'll find someone better than Riley was on the show."

"Yeah, he was a douche," Xander agreed.   She glared at him.   He stared back.   "He was."

"Fine, he was," she muttered, shaking herself out of it.   "But then again, we could talk about your former taste in women."

"Not like it'll happen anytime soon," he said dryly.   "Most women aren't going to want a pregnant guy.   So unless I turn gay and start crossdressing...."   She whimpered and walked out shaking her head.

"That's a *horrible* mental image, dude," Dean complained.

"She needed a nap too," Xander said with a grin.   Sam cackled.   He looked at Giles, who was studiously polishing his glasses and trying not to look at the boy.   "Most women wouldn't want me to be like this."

"Go home, Xander," Giles ordered, sounding tired.   "Please?"

"Fine.   Dean, need a key?"

"I'm fine.   Sammy will let me in."   Xander nodded and went back to the apartment.   Dean looked at Giles.   "That was a bad image."

"The sad thing is, he might be able to pull it off."   Dean walked off shaking his head.   Giles went to get a drink and come back to finish his inventory.   Before that image stuck in his head.   Outside, Dean was shaking like a wet dog to get the image out of his head.   Fortunately a female vampire came to help him so he got to stake her.   That helped some.

***

A few months later, Xander flopped down at a picnic table.   "Hey, guys."   They stared at him.   "Not an issue.   Buffy said there's a problem and she wanted me out of town."

"That's fine," Dean agreed.   "She need help?"

"No, someone wanted to open the hellmouth and she thinks the radiation will hurt her."   He looked at his stomach then at them.   "So, how's tricks?"

"Same old, same old," Dean said with a slight smile.   "Why track us down?   News we should hear?"

"I didn't track you two down.   I tracked Mr. Singer down."   He looked at Bobby.   "Hi, I'm Xander."

"Figured as much."   He shook his hand.   "Why track me down?"

"Wesley and Giles think they found a prophecy saying someone's going to take my daughter right after her birth as a sacrifice to hold open the hellmouth permanently.   You always seemed to know the most wards of anyone on the show.   I wanted to either pick your brain or get you to ward wherever I'm delivering."

"I can do that.   What do you have planned for that?"

Xander shrugged.   "No clue at the moment.   My doc was attacked by vamps the other night.   I got them back but he's still gone.   His partner said he'd still deliver me but he's wary.   He wasn't sure they didn't attack the doc because of me."

"Did they?"

"I think it was more looking for an easy target and he was on a roof drunk and thinking about his upcoming divorce.   But I could be wrong."   That got a nod.   "So I'm open to suggestions about where as long as they have sedatives and good surgeons who won't make me bleed to death."

"I can work on that," he decided.   "Any idea who the threat is?"   Xander pulled a piece of folded paper out of his back pocket and handed it over.   He read it, then smiled.   "I'm pretty sure we can handle it.   She going to be special?"

"Nope.   Totally normal according to the sources we asked.   No magic, no skills, nothing."

"Any word on the father?" Sam asked.

Xander nodded.   "Yup, someone filled me in with that without me needing to have the huge needle inserted near my bellybutton."

"And?" Dean asked.

Xander looked at them.   "I'm not going to answer that.   Because even if it was, there's no way you two would be comfortable settling down in Sunnydale for the rest of your lives."   They gaped.   "So she's mine.   You guys are godparents."   He stared at Dean.   "You can be an uncle, not a problem."

"We'd still help," Sam said.

"How?" Bobby asked.   "You can't settle down and quit hunting, either of you.   You can't support a kid without a full time job these days.   He's right about that."

Xander nodded.   "Which is why you two are both uncles."

"So it's a baby Winchester," Sam said.   Xander nodded.   "You're sure?"

"Yup.   It was made very clear to me which one of you it was."   Bobby groaned.   "But she's still going to be perfectly normal.   If I catch her hunting vamps before she's eighteen, I'm kicking her ass."   They snickered at that.   "I am.   I started at fifteen.   She's not."

"Agreed," Dean said.   "You sure?"

"Be a favorite uncle.   Spoil her rotten.   Consider her a daughter if you want.   I don't mind, but I'm not going to make it official because she'd be enough of a target just because of what I do.   Not to mention what you guys do too."

Dean nodded.   "I can understand that.   She'll be a Harris?"   Xander nodded.   "Got a good name yet?"

"No clue.   Got any you like?   Buffy suggested your mom's name but I didn't think your dad would like that."

"He didn't say anything but he might," Bobby agreed.   "You've got time to figure that out."

"As long as we can be very fussy uncles," Dean said firmly.

Xander nodded.   "I'm not going to block contact or anything, Dean.   I'm just not going to make it official because it'll end up putting her into more danger."

"So which one's is it?" Bobby asked.   Xander pointed at the person walking toward them.   "What's...."    The guy stopped and bowed at the lump of Xander's stomach then kissed it before giving him a shy grin and leaving.   "That's strange."

"It's Sammy's," Dean said quietly.   He stared at Xander until he nodded.   "So they think he'll have her tainted so she can take over the army they want him to run?"

"Yup.   I've shot back a few times about how she'll be my daughter and a lot like me.   A few didn't recognize me until I had a mood swing on them."   He grinned sweetly.   "They wanted to come crying to Sam to get him to calm me down.   Buffy stopped them before they bothered you."

Sam snorted.   "No way is any demon getting near her."

"Lorne said that she'd have Spike wrapped around her pinky."

"He's not one I'd mind babysitting," Sam decided.   "As long as he's chipped."

"There's no way I'd let him near either of us otherwise.   Though she does like to kick at his voice."

"Is she active?" Sam asked.

"Very.   And fussy already."   He looked down then reached for one of Dean's pork rinds.   "Please?" he begged before taking a bite, then he groaned and grabbed his stomach.    "Come on, it's pig, it's real food."   He finished it and she kicked him again, making him sigh.   "She's a bit fussy," he said, sounding out of breath.   "She believes in intestinal bruising being corrective.   Won't let me eat twinkies either.   She has a thing about chicken.   I can eat as much as I want of that.   Even fried, but she hates anything artificial."

Bobby grinned.   "They say it's the baby that makes you have the strange food cravings."

"Not so many of those.   Except for caramel."

"That's artificial," Dean said.

"No, the food channel said you can make it by burning sugar," Xander said.   He snatched another one, eating it even though she kicked.   Sam reached over, hand hovering just over his stomach.   "Go ahead.   You guys can pat her all you want.   Maybe she'll calm down for you two.   Or you, Mr. Singer."

"No thanks.   I'm not into that stuff."

"She's amazing," Sam said, beaming at Xander.   "She kicked me."

"She does that a lot," Xander promised.   Dean pushed over the bag.   He looked at it.   Then he sighed and ate another one.   She kicked up a storm, making him nearly double over to make her stop.   "I need those parts, dear.   Please?"

Dean shifted over to help too, blowing on and rubbing his hands to warm them before touching her.   She calmed down.   "Yeah, you know your favorite uncle, sweetheart.   Good girl.   We'll make him eat some chicken soon."   She gave one last good kick then settled down.   He and Sammy grinned.   "We can have a real picnic."

Xander nodded.   "Thanks, guys.   Buffy tried that and she got my lungs the last time."   He slowly straightened up and shifted so they could pat the tummy all they wanted.   He looked at the bag, giving it a wistful look.   She gave a small kick, making Sam laugh.   Sam gave him a granola bar out of his bag.   "Thanks, Sam."   He nibbled on it and she liked it apparently.   "You're strange, daughter.   Pretty soon you'll start to appreciate tofu and I'm not that sort of guy," he said, looking down.   Bobby chuckled.   "We'll be fine.   Once she can eat I'll show her the beauty of twinkies and things.   Even if her Aunt Tara does want her to be a vegan."   He nibbled another bite.   "So, anything going on that I can go handle?"

"Sitting on your butt so you don't get hurt?" Bobby suggested.

"I'll go nuts."

"I can understand that but you probably shouldn't be getting into fights."

"I know but she's protected by a big sack of water.   So I'm fine if I get into a little fight but nothing too big."

"No, sorry," Sam said, smiling at him. "You'd worry us horribly."

"I'm not dating you, Sam."

"Still."

"I'm sure we can make sure he's safe enough but not too bored," Dean said.   "Because I gotta agree, Xander.   No getting hurt.   We'd worry ourselves sick."

"I won't," he sighed, shaking his head.   "I'm not a fragile girl."

"Doesn't matter," Bobby told him.   "John'll be worse."

"Do we have to tell him?   He's going to give me dirty looks like I did it on purpose.   Again."

"Again?" Dean asked.

"He was in town a few weeks back."

"Ah," Sam said.   "Did you tell him?"

"Nope.   Because I don't want to have that 'whore' look ever given to me again."

"We'll talk to him first," Dean promised.   A purple demon ran up with a squeal of noise, going to his knees beside Xander's chair.   "What are you doing?"

"The inheritor of the army," he said in awe.   "May I, Mother?"

Xander snarled.   "Do you know who I am?"

"The mother of our future savior."

Xander got up and pulled the demon up.   "Do I look the least bit familiar?   Maybe because I might be a hunter myself?"   The demon swallowed, whimpering some.   He moved the demon back, giving his chest a push.   "For your information, I work with slayers."   The demon burst out crying.   "I'm The Knight," he snarled.   "The only army she's going to be over is *mine*.   Spread that around because she's going to be perfectly *normal*."

"You won't have her tainted?"

"Hell no!" he shouted.   "My daughter!"   The demon burst out in bigger tears, sobbing as he walked off.   "Let the others know," he shouted after him.   "The White Knight is no one's momma."

"Calm down, Xander.   It'll be okay," Dean said calmly.   "It's just a mood swing, dude."   He made Xander sit down and got him another granola bar.   The baby gave a little flutter.  "Are you underweight?   I've never seen a baby that clearly.    Not that I've seen too many but even in movies they aren't that clear."

"Low water and a little underweight.  The doc said he expected these sort of things since I'm not built for this naturally," he complained, picking at it.   "By the way, that's how I found out who the father is."

Sam glared at the direction the demon went then grinned at him.   "If they come back, I'll help kick their ass and so will Dean."

"That's right.   My niece is going to be a bit more girly of a girl."

Xander gave him an odd look.   "She's going to be able to kick ass like Faith but be more stable and loved.   Maybe she'll even get the motorcycle I used to want."

"Do we have plans for school?" Bobby asked.

"I'd like her to have inherited her father's brains instead of mine.   I wouldn't mind at all if she went to college to do something mundane.   It'd be fine with me."

Sam nodded.   "I could like that.   Maybe an accountant or something?"

"If she wants."

"No, something more exciting than that," Dean complained.   "Not an accountant.   She'll be bored."

"Maybe she'll take what you three've done and write horror stories," Bobby offered.

"Could," Xander agreed with a grin.   "Thanks."

"Welcome."   He looked toward the parking lot.   "John's here."

"I should go," Xander said, groaning as he stood up.

"Sit down," Dean ordered.   His father got out and came over.   "I mean it, Xander, sit.   Dad can be civilized for a few hours."   Bobby laughed.   "Can't you, Dad?"

"I can.   Do we know whose it is yet?"

"Mine," Xander said.

"It can't be a clone, boy."   A walking, squealing plant came rushing out and babbled at him, patting his stomach before rushing off again.   "That answers that question."

"She'll be a Harris because I don't want anyone coming after her to get her father," Xander said firmly, staring him down.   "Dean and Sam are going to be close, spoiling uncles."   John glared back.   Xander stared him down.   "There's already one that wants her shortly after birth.   That's why I tracked down Mr. Singer."

"And why Sammy had a vision saying we should come have a picnic with him," Dean agreed.   Sam nodded.   Xander gave him an odd look.   Sam nodded again.   "Yeah, last night," Dean told him.

"Sorry," Xander told him.

"We were traveling to find a new job anyway," Sam assured him.   The plant came back babbling, waving its limbs around.   "What's wrong?"   It babbled.   "Xander, do you understand that?"

"No, I don't."   He pulled out his phone, calling one he had left in town.   "Spike, translate this for me please?"   He held it up.   "Repeat that so we can get it translated," he ordered.   It did it again, the whole sequence including waving limbs.   He listened.   "What's going on?"   He groaned, holding his forehead.   He didn't like visions anymore.   "Bear maybe?"  He nodded.   "We can deal with it.   Thanks."   He hung up then stood up.   "We'll handle it.   Go be safe," he said slowly and clearly.   He pointed.   "Shoo, let us get it."   It ran off.   "Demonic bears anyone?"   He pointed.   "That way.   Snuffling around her nest."

"You sit," John ordered.

"Shut up.   You're not my father either."   He walked that way, shaking his head.   "Sam, get into my trunk," he ordered, tossing his keys.   "Black zip case in the blue bag of gear."   He jogged off to get it for him.   They went to look at the bear, him and Dean squatting down to watch it nose around the nest.   Sam handed it to Bobby since he was between them.   "How do we unpossess a bear?"

"The same way we do humans," Bobby said.

"I wouldn't know," Xander told him quietly.   "It never works on me."   He unzipped the case and pulled out the blow gun then the dart, blowing it at the bear.   It yelped but went down.   "That's werewolf strength.   Should last a half hour."   Bobby and John went to do the exorcism ritual.   Xander came over to look.   "Male or female?"

Bobby looked.   "Those're boy parts, kid."

"Huh.   We should call someone."   He found his phone and called the local 911 number.   "Hi, I'm in the park by the highway and we were having a picnic when a person went running past us screaming about a bear.   Um, since I'm a hunter, I darted it with a tranq dart.   Male, huge, brown.   No idea otherwise.   Doesn't have any gray but it's a good seven feet long it looks like.   There, yes, ma'am.   Just past the picnic area with the black pickup truck.    About a quarter mile back towards the woods.   It should last a few more minutes.   Thank you, ma'am."   He hung up.   "She'll call animal control.   They'll be here soon."

Bobby finally got the demon to float off.   "Good.   That should do it."   They backed off.   "You carry werewolf tranquilizers?"

"Yeah.   I have a friend who is.   He kept getting out of his cage.   It came in handy."   He grinned.   "I carry a good first aid kit too."

"That's never a bad idea," John told him.   He heard running.   "Over here," he called.   Two guys in DNR uniforms ran their way.   "He darted it."

Xander held up a dart.   "It's pretty mild.   I've had to use it on a rabid dog in the past.   It should wear off a few minutes after it's removed or in a half-hour total."

"That's fine, sir."

"I didn't want to kill him."

"That's a good idea.   Go ahead back to your picnic," the lead officer said with a smile.   "We'll move him so he's safe."   They nodded and left.   He looked over the bear.   "Not injured, a bit damp.   Get the tagging kit and another dart, just in case."   His partner went to do that.   "Bring the tarp to move him on too."   He checked the bear over.   Eyes looked normal.   There was no reason for it to be this close to the highway so it had wandered in search of food probably.   They got it tagged on the ear and redarted when it started to wake up then put it carefully onto the tarp so they could carry it to the truck and then off to the deeper woods.

Xander flopped back down in his seat, sneaking another pork rind.   The baby kicked and he grimaced.   "Sorry but I want to nibble this.   You can complain later."   He finished it.

Dean shook his head.   "She likes fried chicken?"

"She doesn't care how it's cooked as long as it's cooked fully and chicken.   I usually get to dip it when it's dry or baked but yeah, she has a thing for chicken."   He snuck another one and she kicked the snot out of him again.   He ended up doubled over, leaning his head on the table while he held the aching parts.

"What's wrong?" John asked.

"She hates him eating pork rinds," Bobby said.   "Again?"   Xander nodded.   "She's got their stubborn nature and yours, kid.   You need to realize that."

Xander looked at him, his eyes damp.   "I'm still going to eat what I want, even if she doesn't like it.   It's my body.   Even if she is a little alien possessing it."

"Fine," Bobby said, nudging the granola bar closer to him.   Xander groaned but went back to eating it.   She calmed down once Dean and Sam were patting her back again.   "You've only got a bit left."

Xander nodded.   "Thankfully.   I couldn't go like an elephant and carry for two years."

Sam grinned.   "Thankfully we don't have to.   Or lay eggs."

"I don't care how she comes out as long as I have drugs.   For all I care, I can crap her out or whatever, as long as I'm not aware of it."

Dean laughed.   "That'd be my feeling too."   Another demon ran over.   "Do not try it," he snarled.   It squealed and bowed to him then Xander's stomach, reaching toward it.   "Ah!"   The demon wet itself then ran off.   "Damn, dude."

"Very," Xander agreed.   "It did make Cordelia laugh when they invaded the Hyperion to come bow to my stomach.   Pissed Gunn and Angel off, but amused Cordelia."   John snorted.   He looked down.   "You done again?"   She kicked him again, making him wince.  "Apparently not.   Take a nap, please?" he begged.

"She'll nap soon," Sam soothed.   "Shift positions so I can work on your back.   You're too tense."   Xander shifted, letting him do whatever he wanted.   He got a few good moans and Xander slowly fell asleep.   "Go ahead and nap, Xander.   If you do, she will," he said in his ear.   Xander nodded, putting his head down on the table to nap.   He smiled.   The baby gave one last kick then stretched and seemed to wiggle for a few seconds before going quiet again.   "Good girl."   He gave her a pat then went back to his seat.   "So."

John gave him an odd look.   "You do that pretty well."

"I took a massage class for stress relief my freshman year.   I figured it'd come in handy with a girlfriend or with muscle cramps."

Dean nodded.   "You did pretty well when my arm cramped."   Sam grinned. "So, what's for dinner besides chicken?"   John gave him an odd look.   "She likes chicken and I'm spoiling the newest little Harris."

"You're going with his plan?"

"Considering we've seen four demons who've come to bow at her and one who said she'd lead the army I'm supposed to lead after I was done?" Sam asked.   John slumped.   "I don't mind and he's not going to stop us from seeing her, Dad.   Just not going to give her our name and not put us on her birth certificate."   Dean nodded at that.   "I'd rather be a real father but he had a point.   I'd have to settle down in Sunnydale and get a full-timejob."

John nodded.   "That's a good point," he agreed quietly.   He stared at Xander.   "She is yours?"

"He never said for sure but everything seems to think so.   That's how he said he found out," Sam told him.   Dean nodded.   "If not, there's something we didn't know about Dean."

"Not hardly," Dean quipped back.  "That's all your freaky thing, Sammy."   Xander shifted.   "Shh," he said, patting him on the head.   "You're safe.   We'll protect you both, Xander."   Xander nodded, staying asleep.   "Should Buffy get help?"

"She told me she didn't need it," John told him.   Sam snorted.   "I know, but she's confident."   He looked at the boy again then at his sons.   "At least he came to tell you."

"No, Sammy had a vision that said we had to be here," Dean said dryly.   "He came to find Bobby since someone wants to take the baby once she's born as a sacrifice her to keep open the hellmouth forever."

"He needed me to do wards," Bobby said, handing over the information.

John scowled.   "That doesn't sound good."

"No, it doesn't," Bobby agreed.   "They got his doc too so wherever I can set it up is good as long as there's drugs and a competent doc."

"I can help," John agreed.

"You can go help Buffy, Dad, and let us do it," Dean offered.

"We can all guard him and her," Bobby said.   "That way you two can pace and fuss and we can watch out for higher demons who want her."

"Farmhouse?" John offered.

"Too much bad has happened in there.   We'll find a more neutral place or a good-tingedplace for it," he said.

Dean nodded.   "Want in California?   Or anywhere else specific?"

"I'll ask around."

Xander sat up panting, looking around.

"It's cool, Xander," Sam soothed, patting him.   Xander stared at him.   "It's just a nightmare.   We're cool."

"Thanks."   He nibbled on the granola bar.   "I don't know why I want these."

"It's a pretty good snack," Sam said.   Xander grinned back.   "Do you want to deliver anywhere in particular?"

"Nope.   As long as there's drugs and a decent doc.   I'd even be good with a demonic healer as long as he can knock me out."

"I don't think we need to look that far," John said.   "We should be able to find a normal doctor to deliver her.   There's a few who handle hunters."

"Would they be comfortable delivering her?   My doc's partner wasn't really."

"I'll ask," John promised.   That got a nod.   "Anything we should know?"

"She hates twinkies.   It's not natural."

"You're a pregnant guy, Xander.   I'm pretty sure unnatural comes under that definition somewhere," Dean pointed out.

"The sad thing was, I can eat nutella on my twinkies.   I can dip it in them and she likes it."  Dean gave him an odd look.

"That's a different type of nut butter," Sam told him.   "How did you thin it out?"

"Heat and then a bit of milk.   It works.   I can eat nearly anything with it.   I even got to freak Spike out like he did when he put blood into my cereal so he could have it."   He grinned.   "He walked off shuddering like I did."

"Congrats," Dean said dryly.   "We can stop and get you some.   Are you staying in the motel near us?"

He shrugged.   "No idea.   I thought I'd let you pick."   They nodded and packed up.   "What's for dinner?"

"Chicken," Sam said with a grin.

"Fried?"

"That'll work, or Chinese," Dean said.   Xander nearly moaned at that.   "There was a buffet place in the next town."   Xander nearly raced for the car.   Dean grinned and Sam beamed, following in the Impala.

"They're going to go nuts with a newborn in the house," John said, shaking his head.

"Yeah, they probably will," Bobby agreed.   "But they're young, they can pace the floors.   Let's hope she doesn't get colic more than once."

"Amen," John agreed.   He shuddered.   "Dean's was horrible.   I nearly screamed back at him."

Bobby snickered.   "I figure it was."   They packed up everything and went to follow the boys to the chinese place.   Then to the motel for the night.   It was a pretty good night.   The boys played cards and giggled through most of it.   Dean subtly kept Xander from drinking any of his beer without him realizing it.   John kept his too.   They were pretty good.   Xander finally curled up on his bed and drifted off.   The boys went back to their room.   John and Bobby went to theirs.   It wasn't too bad of a day.

***

Bobby found a good spot and gave Xander the newspaper he had been looking in.  "Go there until it's time.  The local library has a good collection from a hunter that donated after his death.  It's cheap to live there.  They've got one of those 'already furnished' places for students at the Ag college in the next town."  Xander nodded.  "They also don't really seem to notice the strange stuff all that often.  Hunters have been in and out of that town for years to look at the library for stuff and they never seemed to care."

"Jobs?  So I don't have to break my savings?"

"Probably some, but not higher end.  Maybe things like fast food, store clerk, things that'd make you stand all day."

Xander nodded.  "I can do that.  I have special insoles in my sneakers."  He grinned.  "Thanks, Bobby."

"Welcome.  Least I can do.  We need you somewhere stable in case there's a problem.  That's about four hours from me so I can check up on you for the three fussy assholes in the Winchester clan."  Xander blushed a bit but nodded.  "John will fuss you to death if you have problems," he warned.  "She's his only grandchild and he's come to accept her as that.  So expect him to drop in being nosy now and then too."

"I can handle that and need a sudden nap if he gets too irritating," Xander agreed with a grin.

"Good boy.  Also, say hi to Megan at the diner for me.  She makes some *excellent* pot roast.  Anytime I'm that way I stop in to have some.  She's an older lady, but she's kind and got a mouth on her that makes Dean blush."

Xander beamed.  "I can do that too."  He gave him a hug.  "Sorry, girl warping from Willow," he said at the odd look he got.  He shrugged a bit and rushed off.  "Thank you!"

"Welcome," he called after him with a wave.  "Yeah, those girls warped him badly."  He went to call Megan to talk to her.  "Megan, Bobby Singer.  Yes, me.  I know it's been a while.  I'm sending a new young thing into your town.  A hunter, yes.  Bit of a strange situation but I told him to check out that furnished apartment place and to come say hi to you for me.  I think he could use someone to subtly watch out for him.  You'll see when you see him," he said with a grin.  "He just left so if you have some pot roast made today or tomorrow, I recommended it."  He laughed and hung up so she could get back to work.  She'd fuss and watch over the boy for the Winchester clan very well.  It didn't hurt that both her sons were hunters he had trained either.

He sent an email to Dean and Sam telling him that he had put Xander under Megan's tender care.  They knew her and she'd watch over him for them all. She might even fuss so Sammy didn't have to as often.

***

Xander found the apartment and signed up for it after a few minutes of looking around one.  It was basically a motel room with a small, but full kitchen.  It was furnished.  It even had a kitchen table.  The shower worked well enough.  He had more than enough saved for the deposit and first month, plus if he could find a gentle part-time job it'd help him a lot.  Nothing too strenuous but something that gave him something to do and money for expenses.  He hefted up his bags of gear then went to find the diner.  He walked in and sniffed, moaning.  The waitress gave him an odd look.  "My friend's mother's kitchen smelled like this when she was home and in a cooking mood."  He sat down at the counter.  "Are you Megan?"

"She's in the back."  She went to get her.  The young ones who asked for her usually had a reason.  "Megan, there's a young guy out there who wanted to talk to you."

She came out wiping off her hands.  "Bobby said I might be seeing a young one."

"I'm Xander.  He said to say hi and nearly gushed over your pot roast."

She smiled, looking him over.  "That's good to know.  Son, how did that happen?" she asked.

He looked then at her, then glanced around.  "We had a small realm merging problem.  A witch made an accidental wish.  That's why I'm here instead of a show to you guys."

"Huh?"

"My best friend Buffy is not amused by her either at the moment.  We're coming up on a Halloween thing again."

Megan looked at him.  "That's just strange."

"Yeah but she's a fussy eater too.  Likes fried chicken but I'm really tired of chicken.  She wouldn't even let me have cookies last night, not even if I did dunk them in the funny nut butter stuff she likes."

Megan smiled at the boy.  This one clearly needed a mother figure.  "Let's see how she likes pot roast then.  I just pulled one out."  He beamed and nodded.  "Why are you in town?"

"Had to hide somewhere from the bad stuff.  Bobby's kinda helping me with how she's coming out."

"Little girl?"

He nodded.  "Little hellion in the making," he agreed dryly, cracking her up.  He leaned on the counter.  "Are there any good jobs around here?  Just part-time, enough to pay the rent sort of jobs?"

"A few.  What can you do?"

"I'm on leave from being a crew lead on my construction project.  I've worked fast food, gas-n-go places, was an ice cream man for a few weeks.  I delivered pizzas there for a bit.  Stripped when my car broke down and to make extra money to cover this time when I couldn't work construction.  Worked in the kitchen there too for a bit."

She considered it.  "There's a few you can probably do.  You be all right to stand?"

"Probably.  I have been at work all along."

"Good.  Then we'll see.  Can you do plumbing?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty good at it and interior work," he agreed.  "I can do wiring too."

"Then there's a good crew in town that I can introduce you to tomorrow."  She pinched his cheek.  "Let me get you some pot roast and milk."  He beamed and nodded, wiggling some.  She got him some food and came out to talk to him some more.  When she found out her sons were hunters he opened up more about what had happened.  She didn't understand but she was sure her boys would want to go burn that witch too.  Because doing that to a guy was wrong.

***

Buffy looked around then at Giles.   "Xander's still gone?   Dawn wanted to have a birthday party for him."

"He found the boys and Mr. Singer.   He talked to them about warding the birthing area.   They're finding a good place to have it done since no one thinks it'll be safe to do locally."

"That's fine.   I'll let her know."   She went to call her.   "Bad news, Dawnie.   He's finding a good spot to have the baby.   Yeah, the warding stuff.   I'm sure we'll see her a few days after she's born.   I know it's in storage.   It's cheaper than rent."   She smiled.   "Sure.   You be safe tonight at the dance.   Want me to chaperone?"   Her sister snorted and hung up on her.   "Fine," she said, hanging up her end.   "I'll just trail you to make sure you don't even look at a boy in that special way."   She jogged out to go find something more subtle to wear then headed to track her sister to her school dance.

Giles shook his head.   She was in hyper-protective overdrive again.   Dawn would scream at her later and Joyce would have to get into the middle.   He called Joyce so it didn't end up in a fight.   "Joyce, it's Rupert.   Buffy's tracking Dawn on her way to the dance.   Yes, indeed.   Vowed not to let her near a boy again.   You might, yes.   She's on her way to change."   He smiled.   "No, he's still out of town.   He found the Winchester clan and they've agreed to guard him while he's vulnerable.   I'm sure it'll be soon.   Have a better night."   He hung up since he had heard Buffy burst in through the door.   Joyce could find something necessary for her daughter to do for a few hours.   Dawn did have to grow up sometime, even if she didn't want to think about her seeing a boy.

***

Xander looked at the room Bobby had readied, then nodded.   "That's a lot of painting.   Will I need to help you repaint it?"

"It's temporary.   Don't worry about it.   I know the owner.   She said it was fine, kid."   Xander nodded.   "The bed's comfy and clean.   We can burn or bury it later if you want."   Xander nodded at that, pushing on it.   "The doctor will be here in a few hours.   It's a few days early but it'll be fine."   Xander nodded.   "Go shower and stuff."   Xander dropped his bag and went to do that, coming out in a clean pair of boxers.   Bobby got him into the bed and checked all the marks to make sure nothing had smudged.   He fixed the one that had.   "There."   He smiled at the boy.   "Nervous?"

"Yeah.   I'm shaking."

"I can understand that.   Few hours and it's all done with.   She'll be born.   She won't let you sleep for ages."   Xander grinned.   "Just try to relax.   Do the breathing exercises.   That stuff."

"Not like I went to lamaze class."

"Point.   That would've freaked out some of the women."   He gave him a pat on the head.   "Just a bit longer."   He heard a knock and went to answer the door.   "Hey.   Upstairs.   We've got a clean room set up and one with him in it."   He let John and the doctor inside, following them back up.   "Calm down, Xander."

"I'm trying."

"Good boy," John said.   He patted him on the head.   "This is the doctor.   He's a surgeon usually, an ER guy."   Xander nodded, shaking his hand.

"How did this happen?   I remember watching the show you're on."

"The worlds merged thanks to Willow.   This is the pin holding them together.   She's a girl."

"That's fine.   Anything special?"

"Fully normal," Xander told him.   "Even the ones who see can't tell anything different about her."

"Good."   He waved him back down.   "Let me check her positioning."   Xander laid back, pushing down his boxers so he could feel his stomach.   "How close are you?"

"Few days off my due date."

"Good."   He checked, taking out a marker to make a spot.   "There's her head.   This is her foot," he said, making another, but different, mark.   "It looks like we can do a standard lower incision to get her out."   Xander nodded, swallowing some.   "I heard you want to be knocked out?"

"Please, God.   Just don't let me remember?   I'm still freaked."

"I'd be too," he promised with a smile.   "Any allergies?"

"No."

"Good."   He put the marker back then pulled out a needle and vial.   "Okay, this'll sting but you'll be out.   That way we don't need gas."   Xander nodded.   "Want to move to the clean room?"   Xander shrugged.   "Let's do that."   They got him into the clean room.   He knocked Xander out and Bobby put him into place.   John strapped down his feet.   "Thank you, gentlemen.   Bathroom?"   They pointed.   He went to scrub up then came back to scrub down Xander's stomach once John had moved the boxers out of his way.   He draped the area, then got his sterile tools.   He looked at them.   "No guns or germs near the incision, boys."   They backed off some but both had shotguns ready.   "Is there a risk?"

"Something wants to take her as a sacrifice of blood," Bobby admitted.   "That's why the other room has wards.   We figure it'll be in a few hours, but you never know."

"Good to know.   Don't make me stitch them up too, guys."   He said a silent prayer and bent to open the young man's stomach skin.   John had to look away first.   It wasn't pretty.   Bobby looked away once it was more open.   It was disgusting looking.   "Ah, there we are," he said with a smile.   "One uterus.   Is he going to keep it?"

"Never asked," Bobby admitted.   "Can't be done the natural way from the ultrasound he had saved down for Sammy."

"Good!"   He pierced it and then the water sack, pulling it out to get the baby free.   Everything came out around them.   "Bit of a mess.   Sorry."

"It happens.   It's probably worse the natural way.   I remember Mary made a holy mess."   He glanced then shuddered and turned back toward the window.

The doctor smiled.   "She's cute, guys.   Looks like dark blonde hair."

"Blonde?" John asked.   "From Sammy's kid?"

"Your wife was a blonde and babies darken up," the doctor assured him.

"With the way they bowed to him, has to be Sammy's kid, John," Bobby agreed.   "If we have to, we can test the blood."   John nodded.   The baby wailed when the doctor cut the cord.   "Healthy, doc?"   He glanced back.   "She's wiggly."

"With the way she played soccer with his guts, I'm not surprised," John said, glancing back.   "Should he be open like that?"

"Yes," the doctor said dryly.   "It's fine, boys.   Someone hold her."   He handed her over once he noted the time mentally. Then he got to work cleaning the poor parent up.   "I'll weigh and measure her in a minute.   Go wipe her down in the bathroom."

"Works for me," Bobby agreed, taking the baby to do that.   John followed.

The doctor smiled.   Grandparents.   Typical.   He finished stitching him up, going to check on the baby.   "He's set to be wiped down and put to bed."   He took the baby while they moved the father, shaking his head.   "Poor guy."   He smiled at the little girl.   "At least you're not one of us, dear."   He checked and measured her, then wrote it down for the birth certificate.   "There we are."   He turned and found John there.   "There you go, Grandpa."

"Thank you.   Healthy?"

"Very.   Good weight and height too."   She let out a sniffle.   "A bit chilly.   Do we have diapers and clothes?"

"In the boy's bag," Bobby said, coming in to look over John's shoulder.   "She' s cute."

"Very cute.   The hair is still an issue."

"We can test the prenatal tissue," the doctor said patiently.

"Sure, take a sample.   I've got the boys' samples in my bag," Bobby said.   "Then we'll burn the rest."   That got a nod and they went to dress the baby.   He took the samples and bagged up the rest.   John came in to get it and the mattress to clean up.   He checked on his patient, still napping peacefully while Bobby guarded the baby.   "He should wake up in a few hours."

"Good.   When should she want food and stuff?"

"Few hours, probably not too long.   See if he can nurse for at least a bit.   It'll be better for her."   He smiled.   "I'm headed to file this one.   What's her name?"   Bobby shrugged.   "He didn't have one?"

"He's wobbling.   We can file the birth certificate when he finally decides."

"Sure."   He put it onto the dresser.   "If you need me, call.   Take the normal post surgical precautions.   Remember to support her head.   She'll let you know when she wants something.   She's got good lungs."   He grabbed his bag and left, nodding at John at the burn barrel.   "Need help with the mattress?"

"I can cut it into chunks or flame it there."

"Sure."   He smiled.   "Good luck."   He got into his car and headed home to clean up and make notes in his private journal.   No one would believe this one.   The samples got dropped at the local hospital he had privileges with so they could do the normal tests.

John came up once the things were burned.   "She okay?"

"Not fussy.   Content to be held so far."   Xander snuffled.   "He's been doing that."

"Wasn't he possessed by a primal spirit on the show?"

"Hyena," Bobby said, then groaned and put the baby next to him.   Xander snuffled.   "That's your baby, Xander.   Yours all yours."   He snuffled the baby and pulled her closer.   "Ah!   Not under the sheet!"   He moved the sheet.   "Be careful.   She's a fragile cub."   He sat down again.   "Where did you send the boys?"

"To handle a ghost in the next town's library."   He smirked.   "We didn't need them being that fussy.   They can come take the night shift and walk the floor with her."   He looked down at her.   "She's adorable."

"Yeah, she is.   Want me to go mop the floor?"

"I can do it."   He went to do that.   On the way he called Dean.   "For some reason Sammy's daughter's a dark blonde, son.   Something you wanted to tell me?"   He laughed.   "Perfectly healthy.   Dad's snuffling her right now because he's still out from the drugs.   Burned it all and it's good.   In the final clean up.   That's where we are.   Sure."   He hung up and finished up with the clean mop water then went to hold his granddaughter.   "Give her over."

Bobby handed her over and vacated the chair.   He checked the boy then went to make some coffee.   Sam ran inside and right up the stairs.   "Good."   He smirked.   "Dean, we'll have bloodwork done soon."

"Sure, that's fine with me."   He took some coffee.   "It go okay?"

"So far.   He snuffled her a few times.   I'm guessing that's the hyena."

"Probably.   The last time I saw him knocked out he did the same thing."   He went upstairs to look at her.   "Hey, Baby Harris.   How are we?"

"She's adorable!"

"Until she craps down your arm," John said dryly.   "Help him figure out a name?"   He let them have the chair.   He went to get his own coffee.   "The doc said to see if he can breastfeed."

"Eww," Dean said, walking off shaking his head.

Sam grinned.   "We'll figure it out," he told her.   "Bloodwork?"

"On the way to being done," John said.   "The doc has samples."

"Good."   He put his feet up on the bed, putting her in his lap.   "There, you nap there.   It's a good, comfy spot because Dean says I have fat thighs."

"Your brother's just picking on you," he said, walking off shaking his head.   "Fat thighs?" he asked his older son.

Dean shrugged.   "He was complaining his pants were tight."   He heard a yelp and went up to check on them.   "She try to feed off you?"

"Xander tried to bite my foot."   He glared at the man on the bed.   "You could finish waking up, Xander."

"He got drugged," Dean reminded him.   "Xander!"   He flinched and woke up, sitting up to look around, one hand going to his aching stomach.   "Morning.   Don't try to eat Sammy.   We'd have to complain and take the niece."   Xander stared at him, looking very confused.   He pointed with a grin.   "She's not kicking you anymore."

Xander looked at himself.   "Doesn't hurt anymore," he said, sounding drugged.   "Huh."   He grinned at Sam.   "Hi, Sammy!"

"Go back to sleep, Xander.   We've got her," he said with a grin.   "Just don't bite me again."

"They wanted to know if you could breastfeed her," Dean said.

"Huh?" Xander asked.

"Later," Sam told him.   "We'll talk about it later, Xander.   I have her."   He held her up.   "See, there she is.   What's her name?"

"Belladonna?"   He grinned a goofy grin.

"Not a good first name but maybe as a middle one," Sam said with a grin back.   "We'll talk about it when you wake up."   Xander nodded, laying back down.   "Sleep."   Xander yawned and went to sleep.   "Belladonna?" he asked Dean.

"She's beautiful and will be deadly some year," Dean offered.   He went to tell his father that.   "He wanted Belladonna."

John gave him a confused look.   "That's got to come from being Californian."

"No, Seattle and San Francisco are the cities of screwed up names as far as I know," Dean quipped back with a grin.   Bobby joined them.   "Belladonna?"

"Some year she may be deadly," Bobby said.   "We'll see what he's thinking when he's thinking straight."

Dean nodded.   "Hopefully soon."   He went to answer the ringing phone inside.   "Yeah, John's phone."   He listened.   "It's certain?"   He smiled.   "Good to know, Doc.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "She's yours, Sammy."   He went outside.   "That was the doc.   So far the tests are coming out just fine and she's Sammy's."

"A blonde?" John asked.

Dean played with his dark blonde/sandy brown hair.   "I got it from Mom, she could've too."

"True," Bobby agreed.

"Fine."   They went back inside to find Sam making gooey baby faces at the baby.   "Sam," Dean complained.

"Shut up, jerk."

"Don't do that, you'll make her dumb, bt...brat," Dean complained, taking her to hold.   "Hey, niece.   You good?   Need food, changed, Grandpa to change you?" he offered.

"I don't think it'll be that way," John said, looking down at his grandchild.   "Hi.   How are you?"   The baby blinked at them.   "You'll be fine, dear.   Your dad's a bit fussy but it'll be fine."

"I'm not fussy," Sam complained.

"Bull," Dean told him.

Bobby snickered, coming in to take the baby.   "Let's get you out of the testosterone sucking zone the Winchesters create, little one."   He walked her off.    "We'll go outside for a few minutes.   Let the air clear from the macho posturing."

"Like you don't," Dean called after him.   But he was grinning.

"No, I'm secure in my manhood, Dean.   I don't need to posture or prove it every now and then with any woman available."   He took her outside, shaking his head.   "You'll get used to them.   I promise you will.   And your mom's habit of doing dumb yet good stuff."   Someone clapped so he looked up.   "You're not Spike.   The scar's on the wrong side."

The demon changed shape.   "What's wrong, Bobby?   Problems?"

John came out and Sam handed the baby to Dean, coming out to stand with them.   "Did you need something?" Sam asked the demon.

"What are you doing here?"

"She's mine."   He smirked.   "Rosenburg was drooling over me when the worlds merged."   The demon shuddered and faded then changed again.   "Won't be happening.   You might as well give up and go home."   Dean came out.   "You left her with him?"

"The room's warded so heavily *I* nearly couldn't go in."    He pulled his gun to check then looked at the demon.   "Needed something?"

"Her blood contains power.   We need the power."

"No, you want the power.   Big difference, dude," Sam said.

"We need it to save everyone."

Sam shook his head.   "No.   Not real."   He looked him over then went back inside.   "Have fun."

John looked at Dean, who shrugged.   "No idea," he admitted.   "Hormone transfer?"

"Could be," Bobby admitted.   "Stranger things and all that."

John cocked his shotgun.   "I need a nap so we can get up at two."   He fired at the demon.   It faded out and reappeared closer.   Dean shot.   Sam came out and shot him with a different gun.   The demon screamed and died.   John looked.   "That's not the colt."

"No, it's Xander's."   He let Dean have it and went back inside.   "He's less goofy and awake."

"Try to get him to eat some soup," Bobby called.   He snatched the gun to look at.   "What's this?"   He frowned.   "That's not right," he muttered, holding it up.   It looked like it had an engraved cross on the top.   "Holy relic?"

John took it back, then nodded.   "It's a relic.   It's old.   Not made by Colt."

Sam leaned out.   "Xander said you're thinking too loud about his gun.   He said Giles borrowed it from the Watchers Council for him.   He has to give it back."

"Know anything on it?" Dean asked.

"Kills anything unnatural.   On either side of the spectrum."   He smirked.   "He's thinking about naming her after Faith.   Belladonna Faith Harris?"

"Faith, the other slayer?" John asked.

Sam nodded.   "He wanted to give her a better chance."

"She's gone?" Bobby asked.

"No.   But he thinks it'll make her happier."   He shrugged.   They all shook their heads.   "Okay, I'll tell him."

"Kendra maybe?" Dean suggested.   "Belladonna as a middle name?"

"I'll tell him."   He went back up there.   "Dean likes Belladonna as a middle name."   He sat on the bed beside her and his baby's momma...or whatever he was to him.   "They didn't like Faith."

"I heard.   They're still thinking too loud."

Sam gave him a look.   "Why are you telepathic?"

"I don't know but it's bugging the crap out of me.   Your dad has some really nasty thoughts."

"Eww, Xander."

"Not my fault.   Make him quit thinking about how he wanted to pounce your mom after you two were born for being so womanly."

"Dad, he can hear you thinking about the night after we were born!" Sam yelled.   The baby jumped and looked around then let out a wail.   "Sorry, sweetie."   He picked her up to hold.   "I'm sorry I yelled.   Calm down.   The doctor wanted to know if you could breastfeed.   Give her some immunity boosters."

Xander gave him an odd look.   "No breasts, Sam."

"Want to try?"

"Nope."

"Okay."   He grinned at the baby.   "We need to get you a bottle then."   Bobby came in with one.   "Thanks."

"Heaven?" Bobby suggested.

"Then it'll make someone want to send her there.   I believe in the rule of names."

"So you wanted to name her after Faith?" he asked.

"Because it'd give her a chance at a better life later on.   Someone who cares more than she got."

"Well yes it would," Sam agreed.   "But I'm not sure she'd be happy.   We should check first."

"I'll ask Wes to ask her if she'd mind."

"Okay," Sam agreed.   Xander called and mumbled into the phone then hung up.   Sam smiled, patting him on the head.   "Go back to sleep.   I can feed her."

"I can."

"You'll be feeding her plenty, Xander.   Give me this time while you nap off the rest of the drugs."   Xander nodded at that, curling up beside the baby to nap.   Sam plugged the little hole and watched the baby figure out how the sucking reflex worked.   "That's good, right?" he asked her.

"Use your knees to support her head, Sammy," Bobby ordered.   Sam shifted so she was on his thighs again and well-supported.   "Better."   He went down to talk to them.   "Any good name choices?   He's asking Faith if she'd mind."

Dean considered it.   "Not after me or Dad, not after any old gods, and not after anyone living?" he suggested.

"Saints all right?" Sam called.

"If he wants."

"That telepathy freakiness is too much," John decided.   He looked at Bobby.   "The drugs?"

"I haven't heard of that side effect."

Sam came jogging out, heading for the Impala.   "It's Willow.   She just cooed at the baby through him.   She wanted Isis."

Bobby groaned, moving to help him uncast that spell.   Before it annoyed them all.

"No old gods, just in case it's somehow used to call one back," Dean called.   He shook his head quickly.   "No, that's just wrong."

"She suggested naming her Goddess too," Sam said, coming over with the stuff.   "We need another caster."   Dean followed, John following to guard them.   Sam took the phone back from Xander and got the spell, writing it down.   "Thanks, Giles."   He hung up and gave it to Dean and Bobby.   They worked it over the bed.   Willow faded and Xander was back to himself again.   "So, any other ideas about names for her?"   Xander looked up from feeding her, shaking his head.   "Maria?"

"Sound of Music," Xander said.   "I don't want her to be a failed nun who sings songs that won't leave you alone for days on end."

John smiled.   "Don't name her Artemis or anything, Xander."

"I should name her after Janus."

Sam shuddered.   "No, please don't."

"She won't be causing chaos for that reason," John told him.   "Even my boys didn't."   Sam gave him a dirty look.   "You and Dean gave your share of hell raising.   There were plenty of teachers who wanted to know which chaos god you two were hyping when you picked on each other."

Xander looked at his daughter.   "We should call Ethan somehow to make him pray for sanity.   Yes we should."   She sucked harder.   He called Giles.   "You should tell Ethan about my daughter; watch him pray to Janus for sanity."   He hung up.   "Tara and Joyce wanted girly girl names.   Madeline, Marissa, Abigail, Destiny."

"Until you're a star you can't get away with two awkward names," Sam pointed out.

"I know."

"What do you want it to mean?" Dean asked.

Xander shrugged.   "Beauty or honor or strength?"

"Strength meanings are usually with male names," Sam admitted, pointing at his bag.   "Laptop, Bobby?"

"No wifi here," he pointed out.

"I downloaded a baby name list."   He got into it, letting Xander browse it.   He took the baby.   "You should be napping, young lady."

"She's used to darkness.   Let her get used to all the fussy people and the light," Bobby offered.   Xander nodded, settling her in his lap with a yawn.   "You can rest again if you want.   She'll be up plenty of times tonight."

"Here, let me," John ordered, taking the baby from him.   "You rest.   You've got to heal that incision soon."   Xander nodded, yawning again.   Sam helped him lay back down and John sat down in the chair to feed his grandchild.   "Take the laptop and give him a few good suggestions, guys."   They went to do that on the porch.   He looked at her.   "You're something I never thought would come into being," he said quietly.   "I'll be less of a hardass about you, I promise."   She drifted off.   "Even if you can't date any boys like your uncle.   Or else I'll have a lot of corpses to salt and burn, precious.   Since I don't know too many private places to bury all the ones who'll want you, let's go easy like Sammy did, okay?   Just like your daddy.   Don't date until you're seventeen."

***

to next part

Sam opened the door to the Magic Box, getting out of the way with a grin for the girls.

Xander walked in, followed by Dean and John, who had shotguns on them. "May I present to you Isabelle Belladonna Harris?"

"You named her finally?" Willow squealed, coming over to bounce and look at the baby.   "Hi, baby!"

"Calm down," John ordered.   "You can't bounce a baby."

"Bounce, shake, or otherwise make them have baby concussions," Sam agreed.   She pouted.   "Tough, it can kill them or cause brain damage."   She sat down and Xander handed over the baby.

Buffy leaned closer.   "Hand over my niece."   Willow pouted but handed her over.   "Hi, Isabelle."   The baby greeted her by sucking her aunt's finger for her.   Tara leaned on Buffy's arm, smiling at the baby.   "She's adorable, guys."   Xander nodded, sitting down with a wince.   "You okay?" Buffy asked.

"Stomach's still a bit sore."

"Why?"

"She didn't come out naturally, Buffy," he told her.   She blushed.   "It was surgery."

"And four demons, not just one, that wanted her," Dean said.

John nodded.   "We had a witch we know cast some protections on her.   Had her baptized too."

Buffy nodded.   "Good.   Should we have to add more protections?"

"Nope," Xander said.   "I made sure."   She nodded but Willow pouted at him.   "She was an older witch that had been doing this stuff for decades, Willow.   She warded a few other hunters' kids too."   She nodded, accepting that.   "Angel had heard of her."

"That's fine then.   I guess."   She took the baby but Tara carefully snatched her.   "Hey!   My turn."

Tara looked at her.   "You're vibrating," she whispered.   "It's not good for her."   She smiled at the baby.   "Hello, niece."

Xander yawned.   The girls all looked at him.   "Sam had on sleepy music in the car."

"He's still too sore to drive," Sam offered, sitting down too.   "You guys could relax."

Spike stomped in and slammed the door.

"Hey!" Xander shouted.   "You wake her up, you walk the floor with her."

Spike stopped to stare.   "She's out?"

"Yeah, they do that," Xander said dryly.   "Come meet Isabelle."

"Classical name," he muttered, coming over to look over Tara's shoulder.   "She's scrunched up."

"She was in a mine month bath," John told him.   "Give her another week."   Spike nodded at that.   "What happened?"

"Willie raised his prices again."

Buffy looked at him.   "Sorry."

"S'fine.   She okay?"

"She's fine," Sam promised.

Spike looked at him.   "I take it you know?"

"Considering how many demons came to bow at his stomach, yeah," Dean said dryly.

John swatted him on the arm.   "At least we know most of them are now scared of touching her."

"Yeah, there is that," he agreed.   "Should we ward the baby's room anyway?"

"I have to find a new place," Xander reminded them.   "And start work again soon."

"There's a good daycare by the Catholic church on third," Buffy said.   "Mom talked to them."   Xander grinned and nodded.   "As for places."   She reached back and got the paper, handing it over.   "Seven new ones that have two bedrooms."   She beamed.   "Including a very nice garage apartment that's owned by someone Spike knows."

"Harmful?" Sam asked him.   Spike shook his head.   "Demonic?"

"Lover to one."

"I'll look at it.   How much is the rent?"

"About what you were paying for your one bedroom but it's all utilities included."

"That's decent," he agreed.   "Can I have her number?"   Spike handed it over.   "Thanks, Spike."

"Can't have her living on the beach."   He walked off before he made an ass of himself cooing over the little girl.   His rep was already bad enough.

"He's being mushy," Buffy said, taking the baby back.   "My turn."   She smiled.   "Hi, Isa.   I'm your Auntie Buffy."   She watched her make sucky faces.   "Is she hungry?"

"Could be.   It's been about an hour," Dean admitted.

"Every two," Sam said.   Echoed by his father.   He reached over and stuck her thumb in her mouth, making her a happier baby.

"It's easier to break a pacifier habit than a thumb habit," Willow told them.   "My parents have research that said so."

Xander looked at her.   "Your parents are screwed up, Willow," he said gently.   "I don't want to be a parent like yours or mine."

"I can understand that.   They're not that great; just stating some research."

"She can show a preference for a pacie or her thumb later on," John told her.   "Mary took away Dean's pacifier and he switched to his thumb until she put him in mittens for six weeks straight to stop him."

"Dad!" Dean complained.   Sam laughed.   "Don't even.   You used to be fussy if you didn't have this special brand of pacifier, Sammy.   Orange flavored with a special tip."

"Your mother liked it," John told him.   "She refuse to let him try different ones until he only accepted that one."   He sat down.   "There's a carrier in the car, ladies.   Go get it so she can sleep."

"She's fine where she is," Buffy protested with a pout.   "I can hold her."

"Your arms are getting tired," Dean said, going to get it.   She got put onto the table so they could all stare at her together.

Willow watched her make puppy noises in her sleep.   "Does she already have nightmares?"

"That's normal," John said.

"So's some groaning," Sam said.   Xander nodded.   "Xander checked her twice for being a zombie."

"With the stuff that comes out of her diapers and the groaning it was a reasonable conclusion," Xander defended.

"They are gross," Sam agreed.

Dean nodded.   "Since she's not mine I get to miss them unless I'm babysitting."

"You can babysit anytime you want, Dean," Sam quipped.

"I don't mind.   She's sweet.   Even with the diapers."

"Hey, there's people who have eight kids," Xander said.   "All born at once."

"If you want to have another one," Sam offered.   "We'll figure it out."

Xander shuddered, shaking his head.   "No thanks."

"If he had more than two we'd have to complain and make him move somewhere safe," Buffy told them.   "Like Utah."

"There's some safe areas but no, there's safer places for him to live with her."

"Bobby said we can't move me near him because he'd never get anything done with her around to coo at him," Xander reminded him.   He looked around.   "Did we eat Dawn?"

"She's with Mom," Buffy said, calling home.   "I'm looking at Isabelle Belladonna Harris."  She hung up on the squeal.   "Mom's happy."

"Willow smiled.    "That's good."   She tickled the baby's stomach.   "You're adorable."   She sniffed then grimaced.   "Eww."   She scooted her chair back.   "Did you have to do that?"

"Yes, she does," Sam said, going out to grab the diaper bag with a sigh.   He came back with Dawn and Joyce, who picked up the baby and sniffed.   "I was going to change that."

"Let me."   She took the bag to the bathroom with the baby, coming out a few minutes later.   "There we go, ladies.   One clean butt.   Isabelle?"

"Isabelle Belladonna Harris," Xander agreed.

Tara gave him an odd look.   "You named her after a deadly herb?"

"Yeah.   She'll be beautifully deadly some year soon."

"We'll give her all sorts of help on how to pick up *good* boys," Buffy promised.

"You could use those tips first, dear," her mother said.

Her daughter sighed.   "Not like I can find good guys who know what I do and aren't freaks, Mom.   Unless you want me to hit on Dean or Sam?   Or John?"

"No thanks," they said in unison.   She scowled at them.   The younger Winchesters smiled at her.

"Fine.   Any cute young hunters recently?"

"I did tell one mutual hunter contact, and she's passing it onto the boys she knows," John promised.

"Thank you, John."

"Welcome."   He patted Xander on the head.   "The birth went well.   The demons that came were stopped."   He pulled out the gun, handing it back to Giles.   "He had a mood swing on a nun," he said quietly.   "We didn't think it was safe anymore."

"Why?" Giles demanded, glaring at Xander.

"Because she told me I was unnatural for holding my daughter.   She didn't even know I had carried her.   I was sitting in the park holding her and telling her about trees.   She berated me for spending time with her instead of making money for her future clothes shopping.   So I kinda had a late mood swing in Modesto."

Giles sighed, shaking his head.   "I suppose she did deserve it."

"Yup," Dean agreed.   "The cops agreed she needed drugs.   They decided Xander pulling a gun to protect them from her was a good idea since she was so deranged.  They told Dad she was only pretending to be a nun too."

"Oh, dear lord," he sighed, looking at the gun. "Is that safe?"   John unloaded it for him and put it into the case Giles pointed at.   "Was it helpful?"

"Killed ten demons including the ones coming for her," Dean told him.   Giles smiled.   "The sight's a bit off if you talk to their armory person.   The grip's a bit loose too."

"I can send that note back with it."   He went to make the note and ship the box back.   Before the gun tainted things around them.   He came out and found a few vampires at the door and Buffy armed with two stakes.   "What is going on?"

"We wanted to see the scion's daughter," one said, sounding awed.

"I'm not the scion," Sam said impatiently.   "I'm not going to lead a demon army or any other army unless aliens invade and then I'll lead a resistance unit.   Other than that, leave Xander's daughter alone!" he finished with a bellow.   They sniffled.   He stared.   "She is Xander's daughter.   Am I clear?"   They nodded and pouted.   "You have three seconds before you're history."   They ran from the store.   He rolled his eyes.

"That's why we wanted him somewhere safer in his last few months," Buffy said.   She sat down.   "We let them leave, Sam?"

"They'll be gotten later once they tell others to quit bothering her," he assured her with a grin.   She smirked back.   "We can hunt once we have everyone set up in the motel."

"It's a dirty, nasty place," Buffy said.   "Not very safe either."

"We'll be together," Dean promised.   "Not the motor lodge but just outside of town."   She nodded at that.   "By the mall."

"That's better."   She smiled.   "We should go hunt those idiots down.   You guys go check in and we'll see you in the morning."   They nodded, going to do that with the baby.   No matter how much Tara tried to hide the baby so she could get more cuddles.   "Just go with them, Tara.   I'm sure she could use girl influences already."   Tara beamed, going with them.   She snuck into John's truck, getting an amused look.   "Isabelle needs girl power lessons already," Buffy called as she walked past the truck.   "And protections on the room."

"Fine," he agreed, but he was smiling.   The shy young witch was very sweet and gentle, plus she had sense so he liked her.  She'd be a good female role model for his granddaughter.  He followed the other cars to the better motel.   They were checked in under Xander's name and found they had connecting rooms.   Xander and Sam, him and Dean.   And Tara was apparently going to be on the boys' couch.   They put the baby down after giving her a bath with Tara's help.   Well, they put her into her aunt's arms and she sang and cooed to her until she drifted to sleep.   Dean and John smirked at each other, going to find dinner for them.   They came back and found Tara unconscious, Sam missing, and Xander with a new bloody lip and black eye.   "What happened?" John demanded once he got Xander up.

Sam strolled in.   "They're very sorry.   That one demon tracked us."   He handed her to Dean then went back outside once he had taken Dean's shotgun.   The demon screamed in pain right after the sound of a shot.   "That way you can't have any of your own!" he shouted after him.   He came back inside, slamming the door.   The baby woke up.   "Shh, I'm sorry," he promised, taking her back.   The shotgun got dropped onto the bed and Sam sat down with her to coo at and calm her.   "Xander?"

"Present," he said, wobbling some.

John checked his eyes.   "Looks like a small concussion, Xander."

"Oops.   Only in town for a few hours too.   The girls are going to pick on me."

"I'll beat 'em if they do," Dean promised.   He looked at her, sticking his finger in her mouth.   It made her quit crying so it was good.   "Dad, check Tara?"   He came over to do that, nodding a bit.   "Here, let's get you down to sleep," he said, taking her to the motel crib to put her down.   "There, you nap."   She snuffled a few times so he stuck her thumb in her mouth.   She sucked on it and was content, slightly.   "I think it's food time."

"I can't breastfeed," Xander complained.

All three guys stared at him.   "Bottle, Xander," Sam told him, moving to fix one.   He handed it to Dean, who stuck it into the moving hole.   She was much happier then.   Tara woke up with a mewl of sound.   "You're okay, Tara.   It was the demon."

"Is she okay?"

"She's fine," Dean promised.   "Here, feed her so we can start the warding lines."   She came over to do that.   They laid down salt lines and she took over from there, making sure nothing was getting into that room.

John smiled at the suddenly hyper young witch.   "Calm down, Tara."   She scowled then went back to it while holding the baby to feed.   John took the baby for now.   "I'll do this.   You finish being a good aunt."   She beamed and did it on the other room too then came back to take the baby to feed.

Xander blinked at her.   "Aww.   She's trying to breastfeed off Auntie Tara."   Tara looked down with a blush, putting the bottle back into her mouth.   "If you want to you can."

"You need to rest," Dean said, pushing him backward.   "Sorry, the demon knocked him out too."   She nodded, looking down to watch the baby eating.   Sam sat beside her to help.   She swatted him.   "Let him help," he said in her ear.   She looked at him.   "You'll get her a lot.   He won't unless I leave him here."

She let Sam have him with a shy grin.   "We'll share."

"With Xander," John reminded her.

She nodded.   "With Xander.   But he works a lot and has patrol."

"He might not be going back to construction," Sam said quietly.   "Because it's such hard work and a lot of hours."

She nodded.   "I can see that.   I know he won't ask for help."   They all shook their heads.   "So we'll do what we can."

Xander blinked, looking over at them.   "Huh?"

"Rest, Xander.   She's nearly asleep," Sam told him.   That got a grunt and a nod, with Xander flipping onto his side.   He was snoring a few minutes later.   He grinned at Tara.   "I have to steal her too."   She bopped him on the knee and took the baby back to put into her crib.   "There.   Need brought back to the dorm?"

"Please."   Dean nodded and took her out to the car, bringing her home for the night.   "You'll protect them?"

"Of course," he said.   She patted him on the cheek then jogged inside.   He smiled, grabbing some extra food on the way back to the room.   He found Sam giving Xander 'he's adorable' looks.   "If you wanna stay for a while, he won't be ready for patrol for at least a few weeks," Dean said quietly.   Sam blinked at him.   "Seriously."

He looked at his daughter then at him.   "Then I might not be able to leave.   I don't blame him for the reasons he has but it's really hard, Dean."

"Of course it is."   He smirked.   "That's those damn mushy girl feelings of yours."   Sam grinned back.   "If you want, we can.   Or just do a job nearby."

"We should do that anyway.   He's going to be sore for a few more weeks."

Dean nodded.   "Probably."   That got a nod and they went to their beds to think and nibble while watching tv.   Sam was watching it on closed captioning so he didn't wake anyone but that was just how he was.   He had a lot to think about.

***

Dean walked up to where Buffy was strolling the next morning.   "Sammy's torn."

"I figured he would be."   She shrugged.   "Mom said she didn't think he could walk off either."

"It's hard, but I know why Xander wanted to keep her a Harris."

"Yeah, so all the demons don't want her."

"I know.   He knows.   It's still hard on him."

"I have no doubt it is.   She's so sweet I almost didn't give her back last night.   Were you there for the birth?"

"Dad and Bobby were.   We were sent on a short hunt just outside of town."

"Ah.   Less fussing fathers."

"Probably, yeah.   It took him nearly three days to decide on Isabelle.   He almost named her after Faith."

"She might like that," she said with a small smile.   "We'd have to check."

"He wants to visit her this weekend."

"I'll write a letter to pass on," she said, smiling at him.   "So, how long are you three in town for?"

"At least until he can drive and finds a place.   Probably a job too."

"His boss wanted him back."

"Construction's hard work and a lot of hours of her being in daycare."

"Good point."   She frowned.   "Maybe he's got an office job."   She shrugged.   "We'll have to see."   She walked him off to the coffee place.   "What else is new?"

"Not much.   Beasts and ghosts and bad guys, oh my," he quipped sarcastically.

"Same here except for the ghosts.   We don't get many of those here," she said.

"Really?   That's strange.   With all the deaths you'd expect a lot more.   None?"

"A few incidences in five years."

"We should look into that.   That's really unnatural."   He frowned then let it clear up.   "I'll tell Sammy.   It'll give him something to read to the baby."

"No hunting," she told him.

"Xander said he'd paddle her if she was under eighteen."

"Me and mom too," she agreed.   He grinned, nodding a bit.   "Good."   She linked her arms through his and walked him off again.   "Now, what does the baby still need?   Mom got him a nice gift certificate to the mall for baby stuff."

"Let him set up a place first, then outfit it."   She nodded and held open the door for him.   "Thanks, Buffy."

"Welcome, Dean."   They walked in and up to the counter.   The girl gave Dean a horrified look.   "Yes, he's back.   Xander too."

The shop girl swallowed.   "How is she?"

"Perfect except for the diaper thing," Dean said with a smirk.   "Sammy said he's not the leader you guys think and she'll never hunt until she's eighteen.   Xander's going to make sure of it."

"And Xander said she's just his," Buffy added.

She nodded quickly.   "She's still an amazing thing.   Many of us are in awe over her being born."   She got them coffees and waved off the money.   "Is Xander showing her off yet?"

"Soon.   We barely got to hold her last night," Buffy told her.   That got a nod and they left.   The girl went to dial her pastor to tell him the good news.

Dean glanced back inside, taking a sip of his coffee then at her.   "Think there's a cult of pregnant Xander with her as an idol?"

"Yeah but they're on the edge of town."

He shook his head.   "You don't mind that?"

"Xander will destroy them if they touch his daughter."

"Good point."   They walked off to the Magic Box.   "Giles, any idea why there's no ghosts in town?"   John's head came up from his newspaper reading.   "Buffy said there wasn't."

"We ran into spirits maybe three times in town," she told him.   "And Xander got sick from one of them."

"That's unusual," John agreed.   "Rupert?"

"I've never really thought about it."

"With the amount of death around here, I'm surprised we don't have a lot of unhappy spirits," John said.   "We should look into that."

"Will it cause problems?" Buffy asked.   "More spirits attacking and vamps?"

"Hopefully not," John offered.

"You won't destroy the reason without finding out?"

"I won't.   I don't want to make your calling any harder," John assured her.   Dean nodded, taking a sip of his coffee.

"Then find out all you want.   And remember, we can put Sam up on a couch somewhere whenever he needs a vacation."   She walked off happier.   "Giles, there were almost no unscared vampires last night.   And they all asked about Izzy."

He rolled his eyes.   "Spike said they're scared Xander's going to scream at them again," he said patiently.

"Mood swing?" Dean asked with a grin.   He'd seen one of those when some redneck had made a comment about Xander's 'beergut' moving and him having an alien inside.   The guy wailing in misery had been very pretty since he had been an ass to Sammy earlier.

"Indeed," he sighed.   "A very loud one that echoed.   He scared an incredible amount of demons threatening that he was going to blow up the whole town if another creature or person came near his stomach or bowed."

"Which is a thought," Dean told him.

"Yes, but not a good one.   With Xander's skills, he might manage it."

"Good point."   He sat down.   "Anything else going on, Dad?"

"Not really.   I talked to Cordelia.   She wanted pictures.   She was going to get the baby something couture but I told her how messy babies are and to get something washable instead.   She promised she'd send it up in a few days."

"That'll help.   Buffy said her mom got him a gift certificate to the mall."

"That'll definitely help him outfit the nursery and his place."

"He's looking at the daycare and that apartment today with Sam driving."

"Why can't he drive?" Giles asked.

"He can't get fully comfortable with the stitches," John said.   "It's usual for new mothers to have stomach pains for a few weeks afterward."

"Oh, I see.   How long before he can patrol?"

"At least a week," Buffy called.   "And my mom wants to babysit tonight."

Dean called.   "Sam, me.   Joyce wants to babysit during patrol tonight.   I know he can't but she still wants the baby.   Oh, the cult to the baby heard she's been born."   He hung up.

***

Sam looked at his phone then stuck it back in his pocket.   "There's a cult to Isabelle?"

"Yeah, some people saw her as a godly miracle."   They shared a look.   "They're on the outer edge of town."

"Dean said they heard she's been born."

"As long as they don't try something.   Because I will make a mess if some cult tries to take her to worship."   Sam gave him a shoulder squeeze.   "I know, it's the end of the hormones.   I'd be nice and let Buffy help in case there were any demons.   Maybe Tara to take the baby so she didn't have to see that."

"I can see that," Sam promised.   "I can definitely see Dad going in with you for some reason."

Xander snorted.   "Your dad thinks I'm selfish and spoiled."

"He thinks the same thing about me but I think you just confuse him, Xander."   Xander shrugged.   "You're cool with me and Dean and that's what's important, right?"

"I guess."   He looked up at him.   "I know I'm not being that fair to you with her."

"I understand the reasons but if you try to block my access to her, we will have a war."   He could definitely get Dean to help him kidnap his daughter if that happened and then they'd let Bobby work on Xander by thumping him on the head with a book until he gave in and let them have her for a good, long time while Xander got visitation.

"I know.   I don't want to but she's gotten a lot of attention from the ones who want you."

"I saw.   Which is the only reason I'm cool with this.   Otherwise you'd have an extra tall roommate all of a sudden and one very nosy uncle most of the time."   Xander nodded, grinning a bit.   "How's things with Anya?"

"She hasn't come to see the baby yet.   Before I left she was pouting about breaking us up."

"Do you think she'll come back?"

"Don't know.   I'm not even sure if she left town or not."

"Good point."   He ruffled Xander's hair, making him duck and grimace.   He grinned.   "You needed messed up.   They'll think it anyway."

"That's true, they so will.   Which is why the cult might try to claim her."   Sam shook his head.   "You don't think it's possible?"

"I don't think they want to go that far.   Even your cops would have to step in.   If not, maybe the FBI."

"Maybe."   He gave him a nudge, getting a grin.   "The place is nice."

"I like the apartment a lot more than I liked the daycare."

"Yeah, me too.   But I can't bring her to the site with me."

"I understand that.   Is there another one in town?"

"Not unless I pay someone private.   There's a few of those."   He shrugged.   "I know I'm not going on welfare to raise her."

"I didn't expect you to but they might have a better daycare list at the local help referral agencies."

"I hadn't thought of that."

"We can ask later."   Xander nodded.   "And they might have a good place to start looking for cheaper furniture too."

"They might."   He walked him over to that building.   There was a short wait but not too long.   "Hi, I don't need a referral or anything but I'm hoping you have a few lists.   Or know who would," he told the worker.

"Sure, what sort of lists?   Baby stuff?"

"Basically cheap used furniture places, daycares?" Sam asked.   "He has some money saved up and he'll be getting some help when we can.   He'll probably be looking for a job soon too."

Xander nodded.   "I was working construction and I wouldn't mind going back but I'd need competent help for her."

"I can see that.   Let's see what we have."   She got into her computer, finding a few things she printed.   "Let's see."   She went to get it then came back.   "This is the local helper agency for baby gear.   Since you don't want to dip into their stocks, they should have a list of where you can get things the cheapest."   She handed over that referral.   "That's to get them to talk to you.   This one is the names of some free sample give-aways for things like diapers, formula, that stuff, and that's a list of who we have that does daycare.   Now, the state does have a daycare sponsoring program for those who work but don't make a lot.   We can do that paperwork here if you need us to."   She handed them over with a smile.

"Thank you," Xander said.   "Say thank you, Izzy?"   The baby yawned.   "Thank you."   They shook her hand and left.   "That was a good stop, huh, Izzy.   Are you hungry?   Wet?"

"She doesn't fuss about being wet so we should probably check her diaper."   They went to find a flat spot in the nearer park.   Someone made a disgusted face when they caught them removing her diaper.   "She has to be changed," Sam shot back.   "I'm not going to let her sit around wet."

"Feel lucky I'm not a nudist with her," Xander said with a grin for the old biddy.   She huffed off to complain.   Xander folded up the diaper changing pad and put it away.   A cop strolled their way.   "There was a pad under her."

"I know there was."   He looked at the baby.   "She's cute, Harris.   She seen your parents?"

"Hell no."

"Good."   He looked at Sam then at him.   "Don't cause us any problems."

"If that cult to her tries for her, will you guys actually answer?" Xander asked.

The cop wobbled.   "We'd try."

"I'd do, not try," Xander said.   "Or we'll let you guys clean it up."

"I can understand that.   It's a parent thing."   He patted them on the back.   "She's adorable but making that bad face."

"I noticed," Sam admitted.   "Thank you, Officer."

"Not a problem, boys.   Oh, Miss Miller who does daycare?   Just...don't.   She's under investigation by the ATF."

"Guns?" Xander asked.

"No clue."

"Sure."   He walked off.   "That's good to know."   They waited until she fussed about her diaper being filled to change her.   That way she was done.   They both grimaced too but oh well.   "That better, Izzy?"

"Apparently."   He grabbed stuff to make a bottle, settling in to feed her while Xander cleaned up the pad and put it away in the bag.   "Where's your stuff in storage?"

"Across town.   I was going to have one of Spike's buddies move it for me.   Then have Tara ward the house."

Sam looked at him.   "Not Willow?"

Xander looked around then at him.   "I'm not sure she's better and I don't want to encourage her to use it unless necessary," he said quietly.

"I can agree with that.   It's a good plan."   He looked down.   "Still sleepy?   It's a bit warm so it's good sleeping weather."   He looked at Xander.   "Will it cost you a lot to have them move your stuff?"

"No.   They owe Spike favors.   We pay at least half of Spike's blood bill."   That got a nod.   "If he won't ask them I'll make him change diapers."   Sam burst out laughing.   "It'd make me do things."

"Me too."   He looked down again with a smile.   "How's that, Izzy?   Still hungry?"   She was asleep so he put her back into the carrier.   The bottle went into the bag and it was time to go back to the Magic Box.   They strolled that way, letting a few more people come up to coo at the baby.   They made it inside during one of the cooing incidences.   "We're back," Sam called.   "People like to coo over the baby."

"She's adorable; of course they do," Buffy agreed.   "How's the apartment?"

"We have keys," Sam said.   "And a list of other daycares since that one was kinda...."

"Strange in many ways and not demonic strange," Xander said.  "It had teletubbies on the wall in compromising positions.  Including one in that stripper 'look at my crotch' position."

She shuddered, walking off shaking her head.   "That's got to be evil."

"Yeah.   Sam called the state on 'em," Xander agreed.   They sat down and let the baby sit on the table.   "There we are, Izzy."

Tara drifted over and stole the baby then walked off again.   Both guys smiled at her back.   "She was just changed twice and fed," Sam called after her.   He looked at his brother.   "Dad?"

"Library.   For some reason there's almost no spirits around here."

"Really?" he asked Xander.   Xander nodded.   "That's really strange."

"I figured it was how they died or the hellmouth," he admitted.

"Could be."   Sam stretched.   "Okay, what's on the list this afternoon?"

"Moving out of the motel to the apartment?   It's got two guest rooms and I'll have a couch later."

"It is a three bedroom.   I can camp in the baby's room," Sam promised.   "Dean?"

"Good for me.   Stuff to be moved?"

"Spike?" Xander called.   He came up from the basement to the doorway.   "Think those same demons can move my stuff back for me?"

"Why?"

"So I don't have to haul the couch a week post surgery?"   He grinned.   "Or you can watch Izzy and change her stinky, gross diapers while we move it."

Tara made a horrified noise.   "I'll watch her."

Xander grinned.   "It's an incentive."

"Give me twenty bucks and they'll do it."

Dean tossed over a few bills.   "Tonight?"

"Few hours.   Take the garage?"   Xander nodded.   "Got keys?"   Xander tossed them over.   "Fine.   You owe me."

"I won't tell anyone you cooed," he said dryly with a grin.   "Especially since one of the demons earlier was muttering about Dru being localish because they'd have to protect Izzy from her."

Spike shuddered.   "That's a good warning."   He went to talk to the demons.   The twenty was his pay, they'd do it to cancel their kitten poker debts to him.   Within two hours Xander's stuff was in his apartment.   They got to spend the afternoon getting baby stuff at the mall and going to talk to the ladies about cheap furniture places.   That got a short shopping raid too.   It was good and by that night they all collapsed.   Dean had even moved John's truck to the street where the apartment was.   Joyce came over with a casserole and switched it for the baby.   Dean laughed but went to help Buffy on patrol.   Sam followed.

John finally showed up, frowning at Xander.   "You already moved in?"

"Yup and you can have the couch.   Dean's got a cot."   That got a nod.   "They're on patrol for the night.   Joyce has the baby.   I'm doing baby laundry of the new stuff."

"I can join the boys on patrol.   You'll be fine?"

"Yeah, I'm fine.   My stomach doesn't hurt that much."   He nodded, going to do that.   Xander went to finish the laundry and make plans with Wes about how to get Izzy to visit her other new aunt.

***

Xander looked up from the small table in the jail's visitor center, smiling at the young woman being led his way.   "Faith."

"X?"   She stopped next to the table, staring at him.   "You don't usually visit."

"I am today.   I'm sharing good news."

"Found God?" she taunted with an evil smirk.   He put the carrier on the table.   She stared.   "You knocked a girl up?"

"Not quite."   She sat down hard, looking at him.   "Did you notice we had a small merging issue?"

"Yeah, I had."

"She's the lock."

"Oh."   She looked.   "So which scooby had her?"

"Me."

She stared, mouth slightly open. "Really?"   He nodded.   "Damn."

"Yup.   She was insane; hated twinkies, pork rinds, anything she thought was artificial.   Drove me nuts."

"I'm sure she did," she said weakly.   She uncovered the carrier to look at the baby.   "You're adorable."

"I almost named her after you but we weren't sure you'd mind."   Faith gave him an odd look.   "That way there's a Faith that has a lot of fussy, loving aunts.   Tara's stealing her all the time."

"Tara?"

"Willow's girlfriend.   She switched after Oz left for control of his inner beast."

"Oh.   That kinda sucks."

"Tara's a sweet girl."

"The blonde?"   Xander nodded, sliding over an envelope.   "Who?"

"Willow and Buffy."

"Thanks.   I never hear news."

"I'm not sure if there's news news or just personal stuff.   I didn't read them."   He shrugged.   "So, this is Isabelle Belladonna Harris."

"Her dad?"

"Sam."

"Sammmmmm," she drew out.

"Winchester," he said very quietly.   She gaped.   He nodded.   She shook her head.   He nodded.   "That's where we merged thanks to Willow.   She was muttering about him when she made the accidental wish."

She shuddered.   "That's just a freaky image."   She looked at the baby again.   "She looks more like her uncle."  She smirked.  "Some of the ladies had a hard-on for the show."

"He said that too but the tests came out."   He shrugged.    "They've been good.   They understood why she's a Harris and staying that way."

"I get that.   The same as B's child will someday have her daddy's name."   Xander nodded.   "Did you at least get to try him out?"

"No."   He gave her an odd look.   "I just broke up with Anya when we found out."

She grimaced.   "The one you took to the prom?"

"Yup."

"You have better taste if you went after me."

He smiled.   "You were definitely deadly enough for my tastes but we never stuck together because you weren't meant to be evil."

She gave him a look.   "You sure about that?"

"Yup."   He nodded.   "If you were, she'd be crying.   She does that at bad guys.   All but Spike."   She gave him another odd look.   "That's probably in Willow's letter.   Long story.   Including a bad former Buffy boyfriend.   Temporary because she's only in it for the pouncing."

"Uh-huh."   She smiled.   "Things are still insane I take it?"

"Yup.   Like always."

"Good to know."   She smiled at the baby.   "You're so fucking adorable, little girl.   You will not end up like me."

"She's perfectly normal," he said quietly.   "No mole, nothing."   She beamed at that.   "If she follows me into the field, she'd better be at least eighteen too.   We wouldn't mind if she went into a normal person field but if she wants she'd better be over the legal age, preferably able to drink too."

"I can see that."   She stroked a finger down the baby's nose, making her flinch and wake up.   "Sorry, sweetie."

"We're calling her Izzy."

"Hi, Izzy.   I'm your daddy's friend Faith."

"You're an aunt, Faith.   Get over it.   When you get out, we'll even let you babysit and change diapers."

She gave him an odd look.   "You'd trust me that much?"

"Yeah.   Wes said you've changed a lot in here."   He patted her wrist, getting a cough from a guard.   "Sorry, they said no touching."

"I know."   She smiled.   "I have."

"I know."   He grinned back.   "That's why I'd trust you with what's important to me."

"Thanks, X."

"Welcome, Faith.   So, isn't she too adorable for words?"

"She's very adorable.   She's going to break hearts, and not in the slutty way I did."

Xander snorted. "I don't care if she enjoys it, Faith.   That's all on her; as long as she's not charging for it I'm happy."   That got a look.   "I don't want her to be the easy chick in the high school but as long as she's not a ho."

"That's a good plan.   Kinda realistic."

"I am me," he said dryly.   He looked at his daughter.   "That's a bad face, daughter.   And they confiscated the diaper bag."   He looked at the guard.   "Can I have the diaper bag long enough to change her?"

"I can get you a diaper and cleaning cloths," he offered.

"Please.   That's the really bad look.   There's a pad in there too, please."   The guard nodded, radioing back and going to get it for him.   Xander got her stripped down once the pad was down, changing her quickly.   "Toss that please, Faith?" he asked, handing her the sealed dirty one.   She tossed it into a can.   He cleaned her up and got her rediapered.   "There, snap that."   He went to toss those out, using the last one to clean his own hands and tossing it out too.   He came back.   "Better, Izzy?"

"Apparently.   She's cooing," Faith said, smiling as she teased the baby's stomach.   "She's a bit pudgy."

"Babies are like that.   They need it to make them grow bigger than Buffy is."   She giggled.  "I don't want her to be that short.  She'll feel like a dwarf next to Sam."

"Good point."   The baby yawned and started to fuss.

"It's not time for food yet.   Stick her thumb in there, Faith."   She did that.   The baby was happier but not totally.   "I'll feed you when we get outside."   The guard got her a bottle too.   "Thanks, man."   He let Faith feed her.   "Sam spent the last few days feeding her before they had to get back on the road."

"He'll be back soon?"

"As often as he can talk Dean into it," he agreed.   She smiled.   "They're promising to come bug Buffy as often as they can.   All three."

"Three?"

"Yeah, they hadn't gotten to Chicago yet."

"Ah.   That's good."

"They helped with the last big thing."

"Very cool."   She looked at the baby again.   "She's something I've never seen me having but she's pretty neat."

"That's because she's sleepy.   She spent all last night up to play."   She giggled.   She put the bottle aside and picked the baby up to burp her.   Izzy did and got put back into the carrier.   "There you go, Izzy.   Feel better?"   The baby fell asleep slowly.   "That's so sweet of you."   He grinned.   "My number's on the back of the envelope if you want to talk or ask for pictures, Faith."

She looked around at the leaving families.   "Damn, it nearly is over."

"We'll be back in about a month or so, pending illness and cranky babies."

"Why?"

"Because Buffy's still the princess her mom made her.   Even with all the reality we see, Buffy likes her princess fantasies.   Willow's... well, she's got a magic addiction."   Faith gaped.   He nodded.   "It happens.   She's gotten help but I'm not sure I want to encourage her with Izzy.   Beyond that, I'm a realistic person.   You're a realistic person.   Her other parent is too.   I don't mind her being spoiled but she's not a princess if she's my daughter."

"Sometimes you have to have the fantasy to get past the reality."

"Yup, but not retreating into it."   He sighed, leaning on the table.   "She's tired, Faith.   We all realize that."   She nodded.   "Dawn's not bad for her but she's still young.   Tara too.   I'm not sure she'll have an Aunt Buffy in a few more years.   Or an Aunt Willow if she dips back into the darkside again."

"She did?"

"Heading there.   Using it for everything, all that."   Faith grimaced.   "Yeah, so I'm not sure about that stuff with her.   Especially not with the baby.   If it was just me, I'd be supportive and helpy, but I can't risk Izzy."

"I understand that."

"Which is why you're an aunt," he told her.   She smiled and nodded.   "So we'll be back in a few weeks or so.   Depending on if she's sick, fussy, or her other parent is in.   Call me to let me know when a good time is.   Or if you just want to talk, Faith."

"I can do that.   Thanks, X."

"Not an issue.   In there's a calling card too."   He winked and stood up, grabbing the bottle.   "Get a hug."   She hugged the baby and he left with her.

Faith settled in to read the letters, smiling at the stamps and calling card inside the envelope.   The guard came to get her, taking her back to her cell.   It was a good visit.   She needed it to keep her sane and on a good path.   She had a new reason to be a good girl again too, because Izzy would not be in a cell like hers if she had any say in it.   There was no way his daughter was going to join her here.   She settled back to reread the letters.   B was a bit light and lacking real news but Willow had babbled about everything, including Izzy.   It was good to hear.

***

Xander walked into the Magic Box.   "Faith looks good.   She looks healthy.   She looked kinda depressed."

"Hopefully the letters will help," Buffy said, waving at Izzy.   "Hi.   That's smelly."

"She laid it on the way off the interstate."   He took the baby and diaper bag into the bathroom then came back.   "What's going on?"

"Great vamp debate," Willow said.   She looked at the baby.   "Which means you've got to go home with daddy soon."

"I'm mostly healed," Xander told them.   "Joyce said she'd watch her during patrols."   Willow grimaced.   He stared her down.   "Don't even try."

"Enough," Buffy said tiredly.   "Xander, until you're fully healed, no.    You just barely got able to drive again.   There's no way I want them to kick you or hit you on the stomach yet.  So until you're no longer sore, no patrolling unless it's an emergency.   But please, go make my mom happy with the baby."   She smiled.   "Give it a few weeks.   We're only in vamp heaven and I can take that."

"Whatever," he muttered.

"It sucks but I'd take time off if I was that sore."

"I know."

"Good!"   She smiled.   "Did she give you a letter back?"

"She read it after we left."

"I guess it'll give her something to do at night," Willow said.

"She wanted to know if Sam and I had tried to make her a sibling."

Buffy gaped, then blushed, shaking her head.   "Yeah, Faith's gonna be okay."   She walked off after grabbing a few stakes. "We'll be back later.   Mom's pouting."

"Sure."   He looked at his daughter.   "C'mon, we'll go see Grandma Joyce."   He walked her that way, knocking before walking in ten minutes later.   "Buffy said you're pouting."

"I am not."   He grinned.   "She wouldn't let you go?"

"She had a point.   I'm still a bit sore.   I'll be back on patrol in a few weeks."

"That's fine, Xander."   She looked at the baby.   "You're still adorable.   How was Faith?"

"She looked a bit depressed.   She liked being an aunt.   Got to feed her for a few minutes and get burped on."   Joyce smiled.   "She's going to be a good aunt."

"Good.   I added to Buffy's letter."

"I figured you did."   He grinned and she smirked back.   "She could use a mothering person too."   He settled down on the couch.   "Treatments going okay?"

"I...   Well, I'm doing good but they're tiring and making me a bit sick.   Which worries the girls."

"I'm guessing it's normal?"

"It is," she agreed.   "The doctors have given me something for it.   It's still worrying the girls."

"Of course it is.   They're your daughters."

She smiled.   "I did raise some fussy daughters."

"Just a few," he agreed dryly, cracking her up.   "Go putter.   We can watch over you while you do the necessary stuff."

"So you're here to watch over me?"

"I'm totally surprised she hasn't had Willow mine the house with cameras so she can watch you in class," he said dryly, pointing at one.   Joyce looked then sighed, shaking her head.   He grinned.   "They do worry about you."

"I know."   She walked off to the kitchen.   "Want some toast, Xander?"

"Sure."   He carried the baby in there, glancing outside.   "Aw, crap," he muttered.   "Joyce, take the baby to your safe area," he ordered.   Joyce gave him an odd look but looked outside when he pointed.   She took the baby and diaperbag with her.   Xander called the police.   "Hi, I'm at the Summers house on Bridge.   There's a lot of people on the lawn staring at the house.   I don't know why but I'm here with Mrs. Summers, who's a bit ill, and my baby daughter.   Yes, this is him.   Please."   He hung up and waited.   Then he called the cops personally.

"Officer Tim, it's Xander Harris.   I'm at Buffy Summers' house and there's a lot of people on the lawn staring at the house.   Her mom's sick and my daughter's here.   I did, about five minutes ago.   There's been no answer."   He went to find the weapons cache.   "Yeah, I've got a crossbow and a sword."   He smiled.   "Thanks, Officer Tim."   He hung up.   "This is not going to be pretty."   Officer Tim showed up to talk to them.   They started to chant 'give us the saint', making Xander wince.   "Not good."   A few tried to rush the house.   The officer called in for backup.   It was early evening so he got some.   Not a lot.   They were overrun pretty quickly.

Xander came out with the crossbow cocked.   "You're not getting my daughter."   They stopped.   "No one is touching my daughter.   Because I am going to destroy anyone who gets near her."   They backed off at that.   "Keep going.   Joyce is sick and I'm not going to let you harm her or my daughter.   Ever."   He saw Buffy jogging his way.   "I'd leave.   Now."   They started to chant again.   He sighed, looking at the officers.   Who shrugged.   "Rioting?" he suggested.   "Can we arrest them?"

"We can," the officers agreed.   They got the people down and cuffed.   Buffy helped when she got there.   They got other cars to come pick them up.   "Is she all right?"

"Joyce has her," he said quietly.

The officers nodded.   They got them cleaned up.   "Maybe you should lock yourselves in," one said.

Xander nodded.   "We had it planned before they showed up."   That got a nod.   "Can you ask the judge that gives them bail to give us a restraining order?"

"We can suggest it," the officer agreed, taking them off.

Buffy looked at Xander.   "Mom?"

"With the baby in her safe room."   She relaxed.   "I saw them gathering and sent her, then called."

"Good!"   She gave the retreating cars a bad look then him.   "So?"

"Cult of Izzy."

"She's cute, but really."   She walked off to tell Giles then go back on patrol.

Xander went back inside.   "They're gone, Joyce."   He came to hug his daughter and her.   "They arrested them.   I asked for a restraining order."

"Good."   She patted his cheek.   "Are you all right?"

"A bit freaked out."

"Me too."   They went back to making toast for the adults, and Xander let her suck on a piece of heavily buttered toast so she could join in their nibbling.   Joyce smiled at that.

"It's good for her."

"Uh-huh."   She looked outside.   "Are those vampires?"

Xander walked out.   "I'm going to stake you all," he shouted.

"You don't have hormone swings anymore," one shot back.

Xander looked at him.   "Why would that matter to me staking you guys?"   They fled.   He went back inside and called Buffy.   "Three vamps on the back lawn who wanted Izzy too."   He hung up and nibbled on his toast.   "Want to come to my place?   It's more defensible."

"We probably should."   They left in the cars, heading to his place.   It only had one entry and a few windows.   So unless they started a fire they were fine.   Since they wanted the baby they wouldn't be starting a fire.

Xander kicked open his weapons trunk and got what he wanted out of it, putting it aside.   Then he went to watch Joyce put her down for the night in her crib.   "She loves that mobile you guys made her."

"It was a good family project."   She started it moving, watching the little girl watch it.   "She does like it."

"Yup.   She'll fuss when it stops if she's not asleep."   They shared a smile.   "Dawn?"

"Sandy."

He went to call.   "It's Xander.   Is Dawn still there?"   He smiled.   "Thanks."   He called home.   "Come to my place.   They wanted the baby so your mom is here."   He hung up.   "She'll run over.   She had Spike walk her.   I heard him rooting for stuff in the kitchen."   She nodded at that.   "That is uber freaky."

"Yeah, it was."

He shook his head, sitting on the couch to watch the street.   He went to let Dawn and Spike in then went back to his post.   "Good night?" he asked Dawn.

"Not bad."   She went to check on the fragile ones, then came back to root in the fridge. "Xander, why do you have baby formula and no food?"

"I need to shop tomorrow."

She rolled her eyes, but went to help her mother.

"Makes sense to me," Spike told him.   "What happened?"

"Cult of Izzy humans and three vamps on Buffy's back lawn," Xander said quietly.   "They told me I didn't have mood swings anymore so I wouldn't stake them."   They shared a look.   Spike snorted, going to hunt those three down for their stupidity.   "You two settle in for a few hours.   Take the spare cot."   They had to deal with it for now.   Someone would make them stop or Xander would go blow up their shrine to Izzy.   Quickly.

***

Spike ran into Buffy in one of the cemeteries.   "Got the three who made them move to whelp's house with the bint and your mother."   He took a drag of his cigarette.   "Little Bit's there too."

"Good.   What happened?"

"Three vamps trying the same thing.   Told whelp he didn't have mood swings so he wouldn't stake 'em."

She snorted.   "They're lucky he didn't shoot first and then quip."

"They're dust now."

"Good."   She walked off with him.   "Any ideas on how to stop that group of people?"

"No clue," he admitted.   She sighed, slumping some.   "Might wanna warn the father, just in case they come to him."

"I thought it was bad when the demons came to bow to her."   She called.   "Dean, it's Buffy.   No, just a head's up.   The cult of Izzy here tried to surround Mom's house.   If there's members elsewhere they might try to bow to Sam too.   Who knows.   No, the cops got them from the house for standing on the lawn and chanting.   Actually, I'm really surprised Xander didn't open fire on them.   He's more paranoid than Tara is about her safety."   She smiled.   "It's handled so far but I thought you should be warned in case they came after Sam to make him a saint's father."   She smiled.   "Patrol.   He's with my mom.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "He'll warn the family."

"Good.   That's a bit freaky."

"Just a bit," she agreed.   They went back to patrol.   "They sounded like they were in LA."

"Could be.   They've only been gone a few days."   He finished his cig and stomped it out, then pulled a stake.   "Fledges helping a friend out."

They went to stop the vampires digging a stuck fledgling out.   It was the most fun they had all night.

***

Dean hung up.   "That cult to Izzy tried to get visiting rights by storming the Summers house," he announced.   John gave him a dirty look.   "They were arrested.   Buffy called in a head's up in case they came to bow at Sammy."

"Should we head back or offer to babysit for a while?" Sam asked.

"If he needs it, he'll call.   She said the cops arrested them," Dean said.   "But I'm not getting that far away until this is settled."

Sam nodded.   "Agreed."

"I could head back," John offered.

Dean shook his head.   "We'll call Xander in a while, make sure it's solved."

Sam pulled out his phone to text Dawn's phone, getting back one two minutes later.   "Xander typed out that they're fine and he's asking for a restraining order and going to talk to a higher authority tomorrow about them."

"Who handles cults?" Dean asked.

"FBI," John said quietly.    "I wish him luck."

Sam smirked.   "He's more stubborn than both of us, Dad.   Combined."   John smiled at that, nodding a bit.   The boy had proven it a time or to when John tried to get pushy and Sam had stuck up for the sensible idea of the moment.   "It'll get fixed or he might end up blowing up their temple to her."

"That could happen too," Dean agreed.   "You never know with Xander."   They all smirked and got back to dinner.   It was going to be a long week but LA had plenty of ghosts for them to deal with for a few hunts.

That way Sam wasn't that far away from his daughter while he decided if he wanted to run back and be a daddy or not.

Dean wouldn't feel abandoned for that as long as they let him fuss over his niece whenever he was in range.   Since Xander readily handed her over whenever either of them were close enough to hand her off, that was still fine.

***

Xander smiled as he got off the elevator, heading for an agent he had seen on tv.   Apparently they had been in the other realm too.   "Agent Epps?" he asked quietly.   The guy looked back then turned to look at him.   "Can I talk to you about a cult that's started to my daughter?"

"Why did they start one to your daughter?"

"Because my best friend and girlfriend's areas got together to make me give birth to her."

Don grimaced.   "How?"

"No idea.   I woke up in the hospital with a nurse telling me that the ER decided I was delusional because their machines said I was pregnant.   The problem is that there's now a cult to my daughter and we had to have some of them arrested last night at a friend's mother's house."

"Sure, let's see if we can help with that.   Are the locals handling it?"

"They arrested them but I'm in Sunnydale."

He winced.  "Never mind.   You guys don't have an effective department."

"I'm impressed three officers came out last night to stop the chanting on her lawn."   He handed over the reports from them and the restraining order that the judge had granted.   "That's what they got from them."   He handed over an envelope.   "That's their temple, where it is, their interior plans, and where the shrine to my daughter is."

"Went scouting?"

Xander stopped him.   "I was at graduation and helped get people out of the way," he said quietly.

The guy stared at him.   "I know what really happened, kid."

"I'm Xander Harris.   I led the defensive action," he said quietly.    That got a nod.   "Now they want my daughter and my first instinct isn't good for the public view."

"I can understand that."   He took him to a room with a table to talk over.   "What have they done so far?"   Xander pointed at the envelope.   He got into the information to look over.   It was fairly comprehensive.   "That's probably not good."

"No, it's not and there were sixteen on the Summers' lawn last night."   He leaned forward.  "I don't want to have to deal with them.   I'd rather someone could stop them non- violently, maybe convince them; but if I have to, I'm going to protect my daughter."

"I understand that," he agreed.   He gave him a reassuring smile.   "I'd do the same thing.   Where is she today?"

"Daycare."

"Do we know if they're part of it?"

"Not as far as I know.   We did check."

"Good."   He got into it again.   It was fairly bad.   "Technically cults are state issues unless this goes across state lines or includes some other area we handle.."

"I gave birth out of state due to the threat they and others posed to me and her.   I went to find some friends who'd protect us during it."

"I can see why."   He went back to it.   "Let me take this to our profilers.   See if it is something we can nudge the state on maybe."   He went to talk to the local profiler office, knocking before walking in upstairs.   "Guys, got a cult."

"To which god?"

"A newborn little girl."   He handed over the information.   "Her ...father is downstairs."

"You paused, why?" the head profiler asked.

The lesser one waved the first sheet.   "Because he gave birth?"

"How?"

"He said he's not sure of the method but he did give birth to her," Don admitted.   "They arrested them last night.   They're in Sunnydale.   He was involved in that graduation problem a few years back."

"Eww," one said, shuddering.   "I went up to debrief the survivors."

Don nodded.   "So, can we do anything other than nudge the state boys?"

The head profiler nodded.   "We can.   He marked a weapons room on the plans."   They groaned, moving to look at them.   "How did he get these?"

"He scouted.   He's in one of our interrogation rooms."

"Sure," they agreed, coming down to work with him.

Xander looked up as more people came in.   "Geek squad?"

"Profilers," one said with a grin.

"Mr. Harris," the one who knew Sunnydale said.

Xander stood up and moved his jeans and shirt out of the way, showing the incision.   "C-Section."

"How?"

"Willow and my girlfriend Anya decided to get together to wish I knew what women went through."   The lead profiler gave him an odd look.   "I deal with strange things."

"I remember you as a show," he mouthed.

"And that's why," he agreed.   That got a nod and they settled in to deal with it.

"What type of weapons?" Don asked.   "Any idea?"

"A few swords in the temple around the shrine to defend her.   A few guns in that room but they looked like it was growing."   That got a nod.   They weren't happy but it was fine.   They decided to set up some surveillance to watch over their methods for now.   It was the best they could do until they did something bad.

***

Xander was back the next day with the baby.   "Okay, now what're we doing since I had to stop one from breaking in to get her?" he asked.

"The locals didn't say that."

"They never showed up.   I dropped them on their desks after I beat the shit out of them."

Don nodded.   "Sure, I can understand that.   Let's call and see what's going on."

"They're sulking since I took her with me today."

"Let us make the major moves, Harris."   He had him sit down, smiling at the sleeping baby.   "She's cute."

"Everyone says that," he said with a grin.   "She'll scream and fuss if they're bad people."

"How good is her judgement?"

"Eeeh.   She thinks pork rinds are artificial and didn't like me eating them or twinkies, but she liked fried chicken."

"That's strange."

"Yeah.   Kicked the snot out of me when I did it.   Recently, she's been pretty cool about it."

"Good to know."   He made that note and called Sunnydale's PD to see what had happened.   He got a concise report then hung up on the complaining period.   "They said they want to arrest you but they can't."

Xander nodded.   "Because they didn't answer the 911 call."

"True."   He went over it.   "What're they doing today?"

"I think a few are in town.   I'm not real sure."

"We can check."   He made another call and then brought the boy to a safer room.   "Stay in here.   One's here."   He went to get the profiler so they could question the guy.   The building's guards were nice enough to arrest the guy waiting on them to come out and escort him forcefully up to an interrogation room.   Don walked in with the profiler.   "So, a cult to a baby?"

"She's the savior of us."

"She's a newborn.   She can't save anyone," Don said, sitting across from him.   "No matter how she came to be, she's not a saint.   No baby is born a saint."

"She was created by God to lead us.   That heathen who has her should not!" he said firmly.

"He's the one who gave birth to her," the profiler said.   "Like Mary gave birth to Jesus."

The guy shrugged.   "We'll accept him for that much but he *touches* her."

Xander walked in without the baby.   "Of course I touch her.   I rock her to sleep, I hold her while I feed her, and I change her diapers and clothes.   I give her baths.   You can't not touch a baby even if you could manage all that without touching one.   They grow up wrong."

"She'll be fine when we have her.    She'll be raised right; to save us from the ungodly ones.  Like those around you."

Xander leaned down to get into his face.   "I doubt that seriously."

"Harris," Don ordered.   Xander backed up.   "Where is she?"

"The one agent is cooing over her.   Dark hair, dark skin?"

"David.   Okay.   He's on my team."

"So I heard.   That's why I came to you."   He looked at him.   "I don't want to have to hurt you for touching my daughter."   He left, going to check on her.

Don looked at him again.    "I'm pretty sure he can do it too."

"He still is wrong to touch her that way.   He pats her and treats her like less than a saint.   He may have given birth to her but he is not the sainted one's real parent.   God is."

The profiler shook his head.   "I've seen the surgical scar.   I've gotten his records from his doctor.   He carried and gave birth to her."

"He did not push her out?" the cultist asked.

"No, she was born via C-section," the profiler told him.   "Whatever they did only created a uterus."

"Then that proves that he is not meant to have her.   He's not a true mother.   That's a sign of the apocalypse.   She'll save us while you other ones burn."

Don looked at the profiler.   "You wait in here while we go translate what you're saying to Harris."   He left with him.   "So?" he asked once they were alone.

"He's cracked mentally."   Don nodded at that.   "We need to find what we can bust them on."   They heard the alarms and ran out to see a few other cult members coming off the elevator to try to snatch the baby or free their friend, one of the two.   Xander got one on the head.   "Where's the baby?" he called.

"Safe."   He looked over then grabbed a fallen agent's gun, shooting at the ceiling.   "I said stop it!" he bellowed.   They stopped.   The agents edged their hands toward their weapons.  "You do not disrespect these agents this way or my daughter!"   He handed the gun off and pulled his daughter out of a desk drawer.   "You're endangering her and I will not allow it.   And I do know how to cure these problems so she *never* has to deal with your kind again.   You won't have to worry about God's love.   Am I clear?" he snarled at one of them.   She burst out crying.   "Back on your knees like you're praying."   The baby sniffled.   He looked down.

"I know she's bad.   Calm down."   They fell to their knees, staring at her.   He looked at Don.   "Go ahead."   One reached up but the baby wailed when her hand came near her foot.   "What did I tell you?" he sneered.   "Down.   Now."   She whimpered, laying down and putting her hands out to the sides like the agent was telling her.   He rocked the baby, shh-ing her until she calmed down.   "I know.   They're meanies.   They won't come near you again, Izzy.   I promise.   It'll be okay.   Daddy will make it okay."   He kissed her on the head, earning a few heated looks.

He walked off to get her a bottle from the bag, feeding it to her.   "There, you have nummies."   He dialed a number.   "They raided the FBI."   He hung up.   "Shh.   It'll be okay."   He sat down in Don's chair, settling her in his lap so he could feed her comfortably.   "There, that's better, right?   I'm sorry about the loud noise, Izzy.   It won't happen again.   They won't be coming back."   She burped and went back to sucking, staring at him.   "Daddy will make it all okay," he said quietly.

Don leaned on his wall.   "She okay?"

"Just fine.   That's why I put her in the drawer when the alarm went off."   They shared a look.   "They'll be arrested for breaking the restraining order?"

"And for invading a federal building with weapons."   He walked off to make sure of it.   He came back.   "Don't shoot at the ceilings.   That's cheezy movie stuff, kid."

"It worked."

"Nearly got you shot too."

Xander looked at him.   "He was already down.   It kept others from being hurt too."   He went back to talking to her to keep her calm.   "See, he's a nice guy.   Some year he'll have one of you and it'll be good for the future.   Huh?"   She burped and seemed to smile.   "Is that gas or a real grin?   I don't know yet.   We'll have to wait and see."   The nearest cult member being walked off tried to kick at him.   He grabbed her ankle and yanked, knocking her down.   "Don't you dare bring violence near my daughter," he sneered without looking at her.   "I will make sure nothing touches her."   He looked over.   "Like I have other times when necessary."   The woman crawled back to the agent, letting him help her up and into a cell.

He smiled at his daughter.   "She was pretty dumb, huh?   You'll have brains like your other family.   That way you go on to do great, mundane things for the world."   She let out a large belch with regurged milk.   "Eww."   He used his t-shirt to wipe her mouth off.   "Better?"   She cooed.   "Good girl."   He grinned and put the bottle on the desk, picking her up to burp her again.   She let out another one and more milk.   "I take it you're full?" he teased.   She sucked on his neck.   "No, you're not Uncle Spike.   You can't suck on necks unless you're a vampire, sweetie.   Speaking of, we should go show you to Cordy and Angel.   Yes we should."   He wiped her mouth off with his t-shirt again and let her go back to her nap.    He grinned at the watching agents.   "Sorry about the gun thing but I thought it might solve it sooner."

"Don't do it again, sir."   They went to check on their new inmates.

Xander went to look at the crying cult member, sitting down across from him with her on his shoulder.   "You should have realized what happens around town by now," he said quietly.

"That is unholiness.   Quit touching her!"

"I'm keeping her calm so she doesn't scream and wail about you."   Don walked in and took the baby.   "Thanks."   He looked at him again.   "You know very well what goes on in town."   The man grimaced.   "And that I'm on the *protection* squad."   The man whimpered.   "Do you really think if you come near her I won't react?"

"She is holy!   A saint sent to bring us to redemption!"

"She's not a saint or she wouldn't scream at three am to have her diaper changed."   The man snarled and lunged but Xander blocked his hit and shoved his head down into the table.   "Don't try.   Just, do yourself a favor."   He let him go and leaned back.   "Babies might be born pure but that's because they need it when they annoy people to no end.   Which you're doing to me.  Unfortunately you're not that pure so you don't have the same protection."   He stood up.   "My daughter is mine.   Izzy is never going to be your saint."

"That's not her name."

"Her name is Isabelle Belladonna Harris," he said firmly.   "I can call her cute nicknames if I want since I gave birth to her."   He walked off at the yelling 'why do you have that baby'.   "Chill, that's her uncle.   Dean, diaper bag?"

"Got some in the car still.   She okay?"

"She was in a drawer.   Take her to see her Aunt Cordy and have her Uncle Angel tell her why she shouldn't suck on necks yet?"

Dean smirked.   "Sure, Xander."   He left.

Xander calmed himself again.   "That's her Uncle Dean.   I'd rather have her far away from the violence they want to bring near her."

"He touched her back!" one of the cultists shouted.   "He's evil!"

Xander turned to look at him.   "How do you expect to do things like change diapers without touching them?   Or giving them a bath?"

"It can be done."

"No it can't.   Obviously you've never bathed anyone.   She can't move on her own yet.   She has no bowel control.   That means she needs to be helped to do those things.   Even if you don't like it."

"If necessary, respectful touching would be allowed.   With gloves so we did not taint her with anything unworthy still in us," one woman said.   "And I do have children."

"Not for long when the state gets them," Megan quipped.   She looked at Xander.   "That's her uncle?"

"Yeah."   He looked at the woman.   "And then what?   Who's going to read to her?   Make her happy?   You won't."

"The Lord will tell her stories."

"Don't you think he's a bit busy with all the other crap on his plate?   Everyone from soldiers to athletes are trying to get his attention all the time.   He's got multiple wars and people dying every second.   He doesn't have time to tell anyone any bedtime stories.   Much less burp the baby so she doesn't get colic.   I feel sorry for your kids if you treated them like that.   Worse than mine were."   She glared at that, starting to growl.   "What?   You think you're better than two alcoholics?   Clearly not.   Not even they could mess up this big."   He looked at Megan.   "Can't I just hit them a few times?"

"No, Mr. Harris."

"You sure?"

"If I can't, you can't," Don told him.

"Damn.   Pity."   He stared at one until she tried to hide behind the others.   He looked at Megan.   "Shouldn't women be mad that they made me have her and took something special away from women?"

"I'm upset but not that mad.   Anyone who wants to have kids and who can afford them, go for it."   She frowned.   "Hold on, you were pregnant?"   He pulled up his shirt to show the scar.   "Wow.   Hurt a lot?"

"I demanded and received drugs.   I was in hiding thanks to people like that."

"Probably a good idea."

"She had the worst thing about kicking whenever I wanted a twinkie or chip."   She smiled at that.   "She did.   She had a freaky thing about chicken too."

She nodded.   "Food cravings are common from what my friends said."

"Oh, yeah.   She had a thing with french dressing and I don't like the stuff.   She wanted it on apples."

"One of my friends wanted frogs legs.   Living, uncooked ones a few times."

"Eww.   Worse than mine."   She nodded.   "Did hers kick the snot out of her insides every time she ate something the baby didn't like?"

"No, her baby just kicked randomly.   She did?"

"Every time I wasn't eating to suit her.   I swear she bruised my lungs once because I didn't dip things in nutella."

She laughed.   "That's bad."

"Very."

"Who's the other parent?"

"We're keeping that hidden because people want him for different reasons."

"Us?   Some state?"

He leaned down.   "Do I look familiar?" he asked quietly.

"I saw that show a few times," she hissed back.

"He's another hunter."

"Oh.   Reasonable."   He nodded, straightening up again.   "You should probably rinse the baby spitup out."

Xander looked at his t-shirt.   "It'll wash later."   She nodded at that.   "Do we need me more?   I still wanna hit them. Repeatedly."

"Go," she ordered.   "We have your cell number?"   He wrote it down for her.   "Go hug her.   She needs her mom."

"Dad, please.   She has two dads."   He skipped off, handing in his visitor's badge on the way out.

Megan went to interrupt Don, handing over the phone number.   "He's off controlling his violent instincts against them by getting a hug."

"That's reasonable.   I want to too."   She smiled, leaving them alone.   "Now, let's talk about the little one."   He knew Colby was listening and when they got to weapons, Colby was calling the ATF.   They could share this bust.   This time.   Sunnydale was too strange to go in with just one team.   The last time half of the team hadn't made it home alive.   And those that weren't alive had went for their teammates.

***

Xander walked into the Hyperion, stealing his daughter to hug.   "You are a saint to me, sweetie.   You're controlling my temper so I don't go blow up their church."   She sucked on his cheek.   He smiled.   "Such a good girl to make Daddy calm down."   He kissed her on the head, then handed her back.   "There, talk to him about why sucking on people isn't good for you yet and how you're not Unclie Spike, Izzy."

Wesley smirked.   "She does?"   Xander showed off his most recent baby hickey.   "Missing her thumb or pacifier?"

"Thumb," Sam agreed.   "Again?"

"Fell asleep sucking on my neck last night."   He sat down.   "The FBI is going to make them stop.   Though they all agreed she was very adorable."

"Everyone does," Sam agreed.   "We did make a very pretty baby."

"Now all you have to worry about are the demons," Dean said as he came out with water bottles for them and her.   "Here, Wes."   He took it to feed her.

"I just fed her forty minutes ago."

"She didn't want her thumb," Dean said.   He shrugged.   "Who knows."   He sat down on Sam's other side.   "You good?"

"She's keeping my temper intact because I know she doesn't want to visit me like she does her Aunt Faith," he said calmly.

"Good," Dean agreed.   "Who shot the ceiling?"

"I did.   It stopped them from beating the agents."

"Ah."   Dean took a sip.   "You in trouble?"

"Not that they said," he offered.   Sam snorted, shaking his head.   "Anyway.   Can I have my girl yet, Wes?   Has Cordy seen her?"

"She's not up yet.   Gunn went to get her coffee and wake her up."   The baby let out a fart and all three men sighed.   Sam handed Dean the diaper bag.

"Why is it my job?"

"You get her cleaner."

"Just because you never learned the proper stroke to clean guns, don't blame me or make me change her."   He handed it back.   "She's your spawn."   She belched water and former milk on Wesley's shirt.   "See, clearly yours.   You used to do that all the time, Sammy."

"All babies do that, jerk."   He took the baby to change while Wesley went to change his shirt.

Xander looked at Dean.   "Nicely played."

"Her diapers are disgusting, dude.   No thanks.   I've seen prettier zombies."

Xander nodded.   "Me too."   He took the diaper upstairs.   "Get up and come worship my daughter's cuteness or I'm putting this nasty diaper on your bed," he shouted.

"That's a bit too evil," Gunn complained as he came out of his room.   "The princess is getting pretty."

"Izzy's already pretty," he said with a grin.   "Trash?"

"Her room's right there," he said with a point.   "Angel's is on the other end of the hall."

Xander weighed it then went to put it in Angel's room's trash can.   Gunn laughed.   Xander came down with Cordelia to find Gunn cooing at the baby and her cooing back.   "Yes, she's adorable."

"Very," Wesley agreed.

"Some day she'll be the next me," Cordelia said with a smirk for Xander.

Xander shrugged.   "I don't care as long as she doesn't want to really become a princess, Cordy.   She can't be unless she marries well."   He smirked.   "Fake tiaras only."

"Fine."   She went back to cooing over the baby.   Gunn went to get something to drink. "Bring me another cup of coffee," she ordered.

"Sure, Cordy."   He went into the kitchen shaking his head.   How pitiful was it that a cute baby made them all coo?   It wasn't a guy thing to coo.   He came back and found Dean holding his niece and everyone else missing.   "Demon?"

"Yup."   He looked up.   "Big one who wanted Izzy to bow to too."

"Charming.   How long before that stops?"

"That depends on how soon Sammy and Xander can scare the demon underground."

"Probably not long then."   He sat down, letting Dean have the extra cup of coffee.   He could hear Cordelia shrieking about the demon ruining her clothes.   She wouldn't need it to wake up.

"I *said* she's my daughter and you had better pray to the slayers and every god there is that I never catch any demon near my daughter again or even they won't be able to keep me from destroying everything!" Xander said hotly.   There was a loud thump.   "I don't hear begging!"

"Xander, he can't hurt her.   He's headless," Cordelia was saying.   "Really.   He's gone.   I promise.   Only the cute and nice humans will get near her."   She walked him inside.   "Have you been not sleeping again?   We can probably talk someone into watching her for a night so you can get some."

"I'm fine on sleep.   I nap when she does at night."

"Good!"   She smiled.   "Sit down and hold her while we clean up the mess."   She walked off muttering to herself about hormones and how she thought hers were bad and how she never wanted kids.

Sam smiled.   "Could've been twins."   She shuddered.   So did Wesley.   He finished spraying the remains with lighter fluid then tossed down a match.   "There, cheery bonfire."   He walked inside.   "We're out of lighter fluid, Dean."

"We can pick up more later."   He let him have his spot, going to check on the others.   "Is there some sort of warding spell to make sure I can't get knocked up.   Ever?" Dean asked.

"I'll look into that," Wesley said.

"Good.   Because Rosenburg seemed to like him being a mom.   I don't want her to try me next.   I'd be scarier than Xander."

"I'm not sure that's possible unless you burst out crying from it," Cordelia told him.   He batted her on the arm.   "We won't ruin your macho image by telling anyone that you were telling her about elephants and Sammy riding one once."

"Thanks."

"Welcome."   She batted him on the arm.   "It'll even out once she's not in danger."

"Hell may be gone," Gunn said.   "But it'll even out when she's not in danger anymore."

Dean considered it.   "Is that a bad or a good thing?"

"I don't know.   I'm having that same ethical debate," Cordy said, cracking him up.

Angel came down the stairs avoiding the sunlight.   "What stinks in my room?"

"Xander probably tossed out the last nasty diaper up there," Dean said.

"It'd disgusting."

"You should see it from the source," Dean quipped.

"That one demon Lorne called Barney is gone.   It came near Izzy," Gunn said.   Angel gave him an odd look.   He pointed at the baby.   "Izzy."

"Isabelle," Sam offered.   "Izzy's what she's going to be hearing a lot of."   The vampire just nodded at that.   "The demon wanted to come coo at her and we don't let any demons near her, even the really harmless ones."

"Sunnydale can drive those sort insane," Angel admitted.

"Since some of the higher ones want me, we don't think it's safe," Sam countered.

"Good point."   He looked around.   "Where did Harris go?"   Cordelia pointed at the kitchen.   "Drink?"   She nodded.   "That's fine.   What else is going on?"

"The human cult to Izzy is being busted by the FBI," Dean told him.   "They just tried to break into their building to steal her."

Angel shuddered.   "Must come from her mother."

"That is true.   Every bad thing wants Xander."

"Nah, some of them want Sammy," Dean told her.

"So, she's the spawn of two demon magnets?" Gunn asked, looking amused.

Cordelia moaned.   "Yeah, she is."   Sam gave her a dirty look.   Xander came out with one too.   "She is!"

"Not cute," Xander told her.   "I might be looking for a new job soon."   Sam gave him an interested look.   "My boss was one of the ones in the building assault.   I just realized that."   He sat down with his ice water.   "Want the carrier, Dean?"

"I've got it."   He put her down carefully, letting her sleep.   "Is it normal for babies to suck on your throat?   Xander's got a hickey from her."

"She likes her Uncle Spike since he sneaks in sometimes to stare at her and promise he won't let her turn into Dru," Xander said dryly.   Angel let out a full body shudder.   "Exactly.   So can you talk to her about how sucking on necks is bad for her, Angel?"

Angel looked at him.   "When she's older.   I'm sure she was just wanting her thumb or something."   He fled back to his room, going to toss that stinky thing somewhere else.   Xander always gave him a headache these days.

Xander grinned at Cordy.   "Her Aunt Faith thought she was very cute too."

"She is.   She's adorable; you should put her in commercials or something."

"No thanks."   He looked over.   "She doesn't need fame applied."

"Good point.   That would mess things up," Dean agreed.   "Did Willow get into our records?"

"Yup.   Said she couldn't have the baby's daddy being in jail."   Dean grinned.   "It'll be fine I'm sure.   She's not going to put anything bad in there."

"That'd be nice."

Wesley came out of the office looking pissed.   "Problems?" Cordelia asked.

"Travers just called.   Rupert told him you were in town today.   He wanted to look at the child.   I did tell him I had checked, she was perfectly normal and not a future slayer or witch.   He was insisting that he get to look at her."

"If he tries, I get to mug him for his wallet, right?" he asked Dean.   "Then beat his ass for being such a pain in ours?"

"He'll be here in a few hours."

Xander called Buffy's phone.   "Travers wants to see Izzy.   He'll be in LA in a few hours."   He hung up on her shriek of complaint.   "Guess her teacher's not happy."   Cordelia smirked.   "She wanted to beat him again.   I'm going to support that."

"Good."

Wesley shook his head.   "He wasn't making any threatening notes."

"So?"

"Good point.   I wouldn't trust this situation either."

Dean called his father.   "Hey, Dad, it's us.   We're at the Hyperion and the head of the Watchers Council wants to see Izzy.   I don't know why and neither does anyone else.   He just told Wesley.   Exactly, Dad.   Sure, we're here."   He hung up.   "He'll be over in about an hour.   He does think he knows why there's no spirits on the Hellmouth."

Wesley frowned.   "I assumed the hellmouth banished them."

Dean shrugged.   "Dad said he found a mention."   They settled in to wait.   John got there first since he was local.   "It'll be a few hours."

"That's fine.   We can do this here?" he asked Wesley.

"He'll probably try to get a hotel room to deal with issues from," he admitted.

"We'll see," John said.   That got a nod and they went to set things up for this interesting interview.

***

Xander walked into the hotel room with Sam.   "Why do you want to see my daughter and you do know Buffy's going to kick your ass for being in this country again?"

"She's not in town, young man."

"She's outside the door.   She's one of Izzy's favorite aunts."

"That's good."    He looked at the girl.   "May I?"   Xander stared at him, shaking his head.   "I'm not going to harm her."

"Do I give a damn or trust you?"

"Why do I worry you?"

Xander smirked.   "I do work with Buffy, Travers.   In case you forgot, I'm the one who helps her hunt."   That got a grimace but a nod.   "I know *exactly* how you feel about the girls and your version of the duty.   You're not getting any closer to my daughter."   One of the council's thugs moved closer to them.   Sam pulled out his gun.   The guard swallowed hard and moved back.   "Thank you."   He looked at Travers again.   "Why did you want to see my daughter?"

"To make sure she's not a slayer chosen."

"She's not.   I had a seer look when I was pregnant.   She's perfectly normal."

"She's also the focus of a prophecy about a leader of hell's armies."

Sam groaned.   "I'm not going to lead anything unless there's an invasion.   Just because the demon decided he wanted me doesn't mean I gave in."   Travers gaped.   Sam smirked back.   "Hi, Sam Winchester."

"Oh, dear."

"Oh, yeah."   He smirked happier.   "It could be worse.   Dad and Dean are with Buffy."   He sat down, putting the baby between his and Xander's chairs.   "I have no intention of doing what the demon wanted and he's dead now.   The merging that happened let us know what they knew about our future, the same as we told them what we knew about theirs.   By the way, you're welcome for stopping the First."   Travers groaned, shifting some.   "We got the demon that wanted me so much.   Azazel is gone."

"How?"

"The colt."

"Is that why you needed our weapon?"

"No, that was because half of all the demons think the same thing you do," Xander said dryly.   "I had to go hide from some of them for the birth since I'm a hellmouth baby and they decided she could be useful as a newborn sacrifice.   Thank you for that.   We killed ten fairly powerful demons with it."

"Not a problem.   Best that they're gone.   So, the prophecy...."

"Hinges on me taking over the army for some unknown reason, which I'm not going to do, and me having her tainted, which I'd never do," Sam told him.

"Good."   Travers smirked at the tiny bit of sound she was making.   "You're sure there's no marks on her?"

Xander sighed, picking her up to take off her shirt to show him.   "See, no funky mole."

"Families that know often have a higher chance of having a slayer born," he told him.

"That's nice but I can't get pregnant again as far as we know."   He put the shirt back on her.   "There, Izzy."   He kissed her on the head then put her back into the carrier.   The guardian that moved closer to look down at her got stabbed on the leg, making him yelp.   Buffy kicked in the door.   "Hey, Buffy."   He looked at Travers.   "Anything else?"

"As long as the prophecy would not happen."

"Only if I feel royally fucked by the side of good," Sam said dryly, staring him down.

"And you'd better worry about me before him," Xander reminded him.   "After all, I'm on the hellmouth and more likely to be turned."   Travers went very pale at that.   "So, yeah, not the prophecy you have to worry about, Travers.   I'm the bigger bitch between the two of us and I already don't like the council for the way it treated the slayers I know."   He stood up.   "Stay away from my daughter."   He handed Sam the carrier.   "After you, Sam."   They walked out, John and Dean following them.   "Buffy, need a ride?" he called.

"Give me a few minutes," she called after him.   She glared at Travers, kicking the door shut.   "If you come near Izzy again, you won't have to worry about Xander's temper.   Or even the witches' tempers.   You'll have to deal with mine."   She moved closer to show him why hers was the worst since she *knew* what sort of asshole he was.

***

Xander strolled into the Magic Box that night with the baby.  "Travers said hi, Giles, or I'm sure he would have if his jaw wasn't wired shut."   Giles gaped in horror at him.   "Not me, Buffy.   He said something smartass to her."

"Oh, dear."

Buffy bounced in.   "Travers is very sorry he's such a goober to us, Giles."   She beamed.   "Or at least that's what he mumbled."

"You attacked him?"

"He made my life a living hell," she retorted.   "He was trying for the baby too because of the funky prophecy that Sam defeated."

"That's good to know," he said quietly.

"Unless I have to so everyone's butt is saved or the side of good royally cheeses me off, it won't be happening," Sam said from behind Buffy.   "Can I have the baby, Xander?"

"Sure."   He handed her over.   "I also pointed out it wasn't that prophecy he had to worry about.   It was my temper and the possibility of me being turned," he told Giles.   "Because then I would make sure Buffy would be pleased with how badly he screamed his apologies for the way he treated her."   He smiled sweetly.   "Did the ATF and FBI have fun today?"

"They did raid the warehouse you borrow from."

"I know.   The cult told them."

"Ah."

"The mayor's secretary was one of them."   Giles walked off cleaning his glasses and moaning.   He shrugged, looking down at his very comfy daughter.   "You good?"   She sucked on her thumb, eyes drifting shut.   "I think you have the touch, Sam.   We should get a nap before she wakes up needing fed or changed."

Sam smiled.   "Go ahead, Xander.   I've got her for now."   Xander nodded, going to the couch to take a nap.   He looked at Buffy.   "She should be all right if you wanted to patrol."

"I never want to patrol, Sam.   I have to patrol."   She gathered her stuff then left.   The other Winchesters were pulling up out front.   "Xander's napping.   Sam's doing daddy duty.   Giles walked off muttering swears in some long forgotten language again.   It's patrol time," she finished more cheerfully.   John grabbed stuff and went with her while Dean went to worship a the altar of cuteness that was his niece.   "Is Dean always good with babies?"

"Dean's not really a baby kind of guy.   He's good with younger kids, gets them to talk to him and all that, but babies aren't his thing.   I'm guessing that's all because she's his niece."

"Cordy wanted to put her in commercials."

"She is cute but that would bring publicity."

She nodded.   "I'm pretty sure they discouraged her."   They went back to hunting down the vampires of the night.   "How long do you think it'll take for Sam to break and come back full-time?"

"I'm surprised he could leave the first time.   He's more stubborn than I am since he managed it."   She nodded at that.   "I'm sure it'll happen soon.   Dean'll have to drift back this way when he does.   Those two are too close sometimes."

"Willow still thinks they're doing the nasty."

"I'd beat their asses," he assured her.   "How's her thing going?"

"Good, but not perfect.   She keeps having to stop herself from using the magic.   Is that why Xander didn't let her work on the wards around the new apartment?"

"He didn't want to tempt her back toward her clear path to the darkside.   It was more not tempting her with using it for a bit."

"I can understand that.   She was getting a little scary and from what you guys saw, she was going to get really scary."   He nodded.   "The Feds are still here?"   They ran into one in the park.   "Did you get eaten already?"

Don Epps smirked.   "No, Miss Summers.   None of us got eaten or turned this time.   We're very thankful about that."   She smiled.   "The baby?"

"Magic Box with both dads and Giles."

"Good.   The weapons we found?"

"Well, now and then Xander had to dip into it, but not ours for real."

"I can understand that.   Where is his stash?"   She shrugged.   "You don't know?"

"I don't like guns."   She nodded her head at John.   "That's their sort of hunter's thing.   Slayers use swords and stakes.  Artillery is an apocalypse toy to pet and coo over."

"Do you think Mr. Harris would tell us if we got his stash or not?"

"Can I pet the pretty artillery if you do confiscate it?"

"We'll see.   Where's the Magic Box?"   She pointed.   "Thank you.   Be safe tonight."

"We'll lurk near you guys so you're not eaten."   He nodded, smiling as he walked off.   "Wow, a Fed who understands."

"That's really rare," John agreed, frowning some.   "I hope they don't arrest the boy for it."

"They shouldn't need to.   Xander finds a way to turn in anything too bad."   He nodded at that.   "Probably just some guns he was playing with.   Maybe one piece of artillery in case I needed it for some apocalypse or something."

"Maybe," John agreed.   They kept going, coming back to watch the agents finish clearing out the warehouse.   "Who had that stuff?   It's all older crap."

"That's the old mayor's stash.   The one from graduation."   He shuddered.   "He thought he might need it.   We raided a few times.   Unfortunately we found it after the Judge happened."   Epps came back with Xander and Dean.   "Sam must be guarding her."

"Dean's the weapons nut, not Sammy."   They followed when Dean spotted them.   They walked in and let Xander find the hidden spots he had taken from before.   "What's his like?" he whispered in his son's ear, getting a shrug back.   Xander looked back with a smirk.

"Xander, how many more warehouses do they have to do?" Buffy asked.   "So I know how late it's going to be tonight."

"They only had a few stashes around town but three major areas."   Don gave him an odd look.   "The mayor's stuff.   The demons had one that isn't really touched and Angelus was starting to build one too."

"Can we see those?" Don asked.

"Where have you already hit?"   The list was handed over Xander hummed.   "I didn't know someone was taking things out of the apocalypse demon's vault but apparently so since some of it was missing."   He turned the page.   "Yeah, there it is."

"We found one looting and followed it."   He handed over a picture.   "Dangerous?"

He shook his head.   "Resellers."   He handed it to Buffy.

"Hey, the guys who gave us the nice deal on the new crossbows."

"Yup."   He handed it back.   "There's probably two or three more small stashes in town."

"Can you show us?" Don asked.

"Sure.   Less chance they have of using it on us."

"And yours?" Don asked.

"Nope.   I need mine."

"If they don't have it...."

"Then something else can still need it to be killed," Xander told him.   "I don't have anything truly huge.   I tend to find a way to turn those in.   Which then goes into the storehouse on third, which was supposedly police confiscated materials."

Don smirked evilly.   "Good to know."   They went to look at the others.   "Can I do a gun check, even if I don't confiscate?"

"I can have Dean do one."

"That's not really official.   We should know if there's other stuff up here.   In case of a gas explosion or something.   A real one."

Xander looked back at Dean, who shrugged.   "I'd really rather it stayed with hunters, Agent Epps.   I understand your reasoning but I don't want to have to break into anywhere ever again when we need something suddenly."

"I can see that, kid.   Can I see in an unofficial manner?   Just to see how high it goes?"   Xander looked at Dean, then at John, both of whom shrugged.   "I won't turn you in, Xander.   I know what you do is important."

"Go ahead," Buffy ordered.   "Maybe he can help if we need something in the future, Xander."

"Fine.   But there's one place we have to go to.   Willie stopped us on the way over to tell me to look somewhere.   He only does that when it's weapons."   They nodded.   Xander let him into the other stashes.   The agents with them confiscated things that even Dean couldn't identify.   "Speaking of the strange weapons, I need a new ID manual."

"I'll see if I can get you last year's copy since those are slightly classified, kid," Don promised.   They went to look at the site Xander had been told to look at.   "What're those?" he asked quietly.   There were demons standing guard over the abandoned house.

"Shit, I need steel," Buffy muttered.   "Dean?"

He called back to the Magic Box.   "Sammy, me.   We need steel on the east side of town by the high school's construction zone.   There, yeah.   Dad'll bring it to us.   Just have it dropped off.   Swords, Buffy?"

"I don't care.   They're killed by steel to the stomach."   They nodded and Dean repeated that before hanging up.   She frowned, patting herself down.   Then Xander.   He looked at her.   "Knife, anything?"

"Stainless."

"Oh."   She took it to look at.   "It's small."   He extended the blade, making her happier.   "How do you lock it?"   He did it for her.   "Thanks, Xander."

"I should've been a boy scout," he teased.   Sammy pulled up in his car, getting out.   Xander went to get into his trunk once Sam handed out swords.   He pulled his second favorite weapon, hefting it.   "Heavy but worthwhile.   They're apocalypse demons, Sam.   Go guard the baby?"

"Tara has her."

"Okay."   He handed over something else.   "As long as stainless steel works, we're good."   He nodded and they shut the trunk, heading to handle the situation.   Buffy snuck closer, moving to attack.   Xander was right behind her, like usual.   John and his boys were behind them.   The agents were standing back to wait.   The first one screamed and brought more.   Buffy was swinging her sword very well.   Someone had taught her.   Xander was holding his own.   Sam and Dean weren't familiar with anything that long but they were doing pretty well.   John was shooting them since he had some steel rounds.   It worked just as well as a sword.   Another wave came out and Xander threw something toward the ground, making them trip.   "Marbles," he said with a grin for Buffy.

She rolled her eyes.   "We'll kick them out of the way later."   They finished and it was good.   "Messy," she complained, looking around.

"Lighter fluid cures all," Dean quipped.

"Let's see why Willie sent us here first," Xander ordered.   "The last time I was taking apart a bomb."   Don gave him an odd look.   "Yes, I had to learn."   They walked inside and he paused.   "I can't disarm that.   We need an official disarmer."   Don looked then called from outside.   Xander went to scout around.   "You're going to need a free truck," he called.   He came out with a gun.   "This is the smallest thing in there."   Dean moaned.   Xander nodded.   "Exactly.   There's another bomb that's ready to be moved but doesn't have a lit timer."   The bomb squad people had apparently been waiting outside town.   They hurried in and Xander showed them the other one too.   They got the first stopped and then them both moved.   The ATF agents moved in to clear out the rest.   While they were busy, Xander took Don to his hidey hole of weapons.

Don looked around the place.   It looked like a construction workshop in a you-store-itplace.   "Guns too?"

"Yup."   He opened up a cabinet on a wall to show the guns.   "See?"

Don looked then at him.   "That's all of them?"

Xander grinned.   "Yes."

Don snorted.   "Cute lie, kid.   I'm not going to turn you in."   Xander gave him a look.   "I'm not.   You do things so I don't have to.   Or my little brother doesn't have to."   Xander sighed and got out of the way.   Don searched the place, finding the few opening into the floors.   Nothing.   "Robbed?"

"Sold to other hunters for the baby funds."

"All of it?"

"No.   Just the major stuff we shouldn't need for a few months at the least."   That got a nod.   "Had to make the money somehow to support us while I couldn't work."

"I understand that.   These hunters good guys?"

"No terrorists, I made sure it'd only go to hunters, Agent Epps.   Maybe into an apocalypse vault here or there, but all to hunters."

"Okay, that works for me.   What else do you have stored?"   Xander pointed at a concealed doorway.   It was behind a workbench.   Don found the switch to release it and walked into the next storage area, moaning in pain.   Xander followed.   "What did you sell if these are lighter?"

Xander looked.   "Huh.   The resellers got my order to replace a few things."   He shrugged.  "I didn't have the blue cases before."

Don looked at him.   "What did you sell, kid?"   Xander got his inventory list, letting him see his last notes.   Don moaned at what was on it.

Xander grinned.   "I don't like you that way, sorry.   Though you do appreciate my pretties and former babies, I can't do what Spike would and take advantage of you."

Don smirked back.   "Smartass."   He went to look in the cases.   "This one's not what's listed."

Xander came over to look.   "That's holy.   It's been modified so it's blessed and fires off holy or blessed rounds."   He pointed at the symbol.   "Blessed."

Don nodded, going over the other cases.   He finally looked at the boy.   "This is way too much."

"We handle at least one apocalypse a year, Agent Epps.   This year's would've been a hell goddess if the Winchesters hadn't helped us."

Don shuddered.   "I get that.   Still a bit too much firepower."

"There's still an upcoming spring issue.   Even with Glory out of the way, we've probably got a reason for the build-up of vamps."   His phone rang.   "It's me."   He listened.   "Hi, Mr. Singer.   Sure, Bobby.   They're watching the ATF and other FBI guys weed out some of the demon's stashes around town.   No, the agent that was helping with the cult to Izzy wanted to look at my stash but promised me and John he wouldn't turn it in.   He understands how important it is.   And hey, no more breaking onto the reserve base."

Don whimpered.   "Yeah, that was him.   A few blessed things, some others.   You know, I sold the others through Caleb.   John gave me his number."   He smiled.   "That stuff used to be mine, yeah.   He's another that wanted to pat the tummy of doom but kept himself from doing more than staring at her as she moved."   He laughed.   "We're all in Sunnydale since her cult wanted to keep her and raided the FBI building in LA to get her back.   I can do that.   Sure.   Let us know if we can help.   We've got a build-up of vamps but we should be free for the summer soonish.   Sure, if we can help, let us know.   Blessed iron?   Um...."

He looked around.   "Canisters that throw shrapnel.   Two iron spear tips that need new shafts.   One sword somewhere with Giles."   He heard a moan in the other area.   "I think Dean just came in.   Want him?"   He grinned.   "Dean, it's Bobby."   Dean came in and let out a whimper but fell to his knees at the gear in there.   He handed down his phone with a grin at the agent.   "He's a gun guy too."

"I can tell."   He helped Dean up.   "How big is the hunter's weapons network?"   Xander shrugged.   "You only have the one contact?"

"That and a few demonic ones that hunt other species or who sell things that they find or can confiscate somehow."

"Good.   Are they dangerous?"

"Only if you piss them off.   They're like shopkeepers.   Pawnshop brokers and the like.   A few hunting clans that trade for specific weapons they need."

Dean looked around.   "Canisters that throw shrapnel?" he asked.    Xander leaned over a stack and grabbed one to hand him.   "Oh, shit, dude, this is a shrapnel grenade!"

"Duh.   And it's blessed," he said, pointing at the marks.   "Catholic priest blessed."   He grinned.   "It works very well in nests."

"I'd imagine it would," Dean agreed.   He walked outside, handing his father the canister.   He noticed the Feds.   "Hey, Agent Epps?"   He came out and talked to the head guy, who decided to leave this one alone for the right reasons.   Though they would want an inventory.   Don went to get one from Xander.   They talked for a minute then the ATF guys left.   Don went back inside while Dean figured out the problem Bobby was having come his way.

Dean came in a few minutes later, handing back the phone.   "Can Bobby have this?"

"Sure.   I can make more."   Don gave him an odd look.   "I found the plans online, guys."   He grinned.   "Not that hard."   He looked at Dean.   "Does Bobby need help?   I still owe him for helping with the delivery problem."

"No, he's mostly got it.   He needed another experienced guy at his back.   A newbie was banishing a demon and ended up summoning another one."   Xander shuddered.   "Yeah, basically.   I told Dad.   He's heading."

"If you guys have to go, go.   I can send pictures through the email and you guys can stop in whenever you want.   You know that."

"I know.   Sammy's already back being mushy over her.    If you were a girl, there'd have been a shotgun wedding already, Xander."

"I know," he said with a blush.   "He's nice and sweet too.   He'd be a good husband to someone."

"Swinging to boys maybe?" Dean teased with a grin.

Xander shrugged, but blushed.   "I don't know anymore.   During the horny phase of my second trimester I nearly lost my mind and humped Spike."   Dean cackled.   "I didn't intend to but my body demanded I get some.   He nicely went to get a succuba to tease me."   He grinned.   "She loved the belly of doom too."

"She didn't taint you?" Dean asked.

"No.   Anya told her what I liked by pouting about what she was missing.   I don't know if she knew who Izzy is or not, but she was very nice.   No tainting, no feeding off me, nothing like that."

"Huh.   Never met one who didn't."   He went to tell John that fact, watching him throw a fit and tell Sam.   Who checked, but the baby wasn't tainted by anyone yet.   Xander had some very strange tastes.   Though, he had heard a pregnant woman got desperate around the same time of their pregnancy.   He'd read many complaints by husbands who couldn't keep up.

Xander came back with Don, handing John a spear tip.   "It needs a new shaft but he said he might need something pure iron.   That's as cold iron as you can get.   Barely forged."

John looked at it.   "Thanks, kid."   He looked at him.   "Succubus?"

"Didn't Mary have a second trimester?"   John blushed, clearing his throat.   "Exactly.   It was that or go pounce Anya or go pounce Spike.   Vamps are still dead so therefore disgusting to sleep with.   Anya didn't want to be a stepmommy and I'm not going to be more than friends with her.   I asked Cordy but she refused on the grounds she might turn evil again."   He shrugged.   "It was good."

"At least the baby's not tainted."

"No, she didn't even try to feed off me."

John nodded, patting him on the shoulder.   "You need sanity, Xander."

"It's where I'm napping when she does.   She was up all last night."

"If you say so."   He went to finish his packing, putting that into a bag.   If something happened to Xander, he had already made sure they had paperwork giving the baby to Sammy or Dean.  With the way that boy attracted trouble, it was bound to bite him sometime.   He went up to say goodbye to Sam and Izzy, smiling at his sleeping family.   Sam was conked out on the couch with her on his stomach, sucking on his chest.   He carefully moved her, moving Sam's gun out of his face.   "I'm putting her in her crib," he said quietly.   "Go back to sleep, Sammy."   He put her down, covering her with the sheet, then he left.   Sam was as overprotective as he was.   God help that kid when it tried to date.   Hopefully she wouldn't have her dad's luck in that area.   Or as many as Dean had.   He shook his head quickly, getting into the truck after a hug for Dean.

"Be safe so Izzy can make you a great-grandparent, Dad."   Dean walked off with a smirk.

"Smartass," John muttered, starting the truck and driving off.

Xander looked at Dean.   "No grandkids.   I refuse to be Grandpa Xander for at least twenty years.   I'm only twenty-two."

Dean grinned.   "Let's hope she doesn't have the same pregnancy scare Sammy did in tenth grade then."

"He's really potent.   Hopefully he doesn't knock me up again by looking at me," Xander said dryly.

Dean cackled.   "Dad still thinks Sammy didn't date until he was seventeen."

"Not funny," Sam called.   "I'm not that potent.   And if I can do it that way, Xander, we're both getting fixed."

Xander cackled all the way to his room.   "Night, guys."

"Night," they called, going to their beds.   Sammy in Izzy's room.   Dean in the other room.  It had been a pretty good night.

***

Two weeks later, Xander fired the shot into the front of the church.   He tied the metal strings to the trailer hitch on his car and nodded at Buffy.   "Put it on D and go forward until it caves."

She tried but it went into reverse.   "Oops."   She put it into drive and drove off with the wires attached to the iron spikes that were now stuck in the wall thanks to the thing Xander had fired off.   The whole front of the church pulled off.   Xander walked in there, hearing his baby screaming.   "Someone's going to die," she muttered, calling Don Epps.   "We're really sorry if Xander creates a bloodbath from that cult, Agent Epps.   No, we just pulled the front off the church.   He walked in over the rubble.   He went for impressive."   The crying stopped.   "Ooh, good, she's not crying.   But anyway, we're really sorry if Xander kills them for stealing his daughter from daycare."   She hung up.

Xander came strolling out with his daughter, smile firmly fixed in place.   "Take her to your mom please?"

"Agent Epps said you can't kill them unless the judicial system failed.   He's calling the people watching over them.   Because kidnaping is wrong."   Xander turned and punched a person coming up behind him.   "Whoa, nearly slayer strength," she said, backing off with the baby.   "Maybe you should calm down?"

"Untie the wires and take her to your mother, Buffy," he said slowly and clearly.   She did that and sped off.   She'd drive extra carefully so the baby didn't get hurt.   Xander turned to look up at the cross on top of the church.   "You wanted them in hell that badly?  Couldn't you just send a demon instead of sending my daughter?"   Cars with sirens pulled up.   He looked back at them.   "I left them living.   I'm proud of myself."

One got out of the car.   "What happened, Mr. Harris?" Megan asked.

"They took Izzy from daycare.   They put her on their nice altar and let her cry for the last two hours.   I don't know why it took the daycare an hour and a half to tell me, but I'm going to find out when I'm calmer."    He stared at the local cops.

"We're happy, you didn't blow them up."

"Over too soon," he growled.

"Sure, we get that.   Is the baby okay?" one asked, backing up and pulling his partner with him.

"Buffy's taking her to Joyce."

"Good!" that one agreed, nodding quickly.   "We can give you a ride, Harris.   Please?"

Xander turned and looked up at the cross.   "Make them leave her alone or next time, I can't promise I won't have a temper," he whispered.   He got into the police car, letting them take him to Joyce's so they could take a statement for the Feds.

Megan looked at the remaining cops.   "Go arrest them so they don't commit suicide."   They ran in there to do that.   She looked up at the cross.   "You needed more fanatics?" she asked it.   They were huddled around the altar, crying for the most part, and staring at the shiny, clean knife on it.   "Did Harris leave that?"

The head minister looked at her.   "It is our only option since we are unworthy to keep her.  If he could take her back and he's unworthy then we definitely are."

She pulled him up to cuff him.   "You don't get to get off that easily."   She handed him off.  A few rushed for the knife.   A thin, sharp wire came up and nearly gutted one before she reached the knife.   She wailed, collapsing to hold her stomach.   "That looks like Harris' work."   One of the cops nodded, looking away as he hauled her up to cuff her too.   "See, even he thinks you're unworthy to die."   They got the rest and Megan got confiscate their guns.   They had some very nice ones.   Their lab techs were going to coo for days over them before they got put in for destruction.   Pity but they shouldn't have touched that baby.

***

Xander walked up to where Bobby was waiting, handing over the baby at his odd look.   "I was requested to take a vacation away from California so the cultists would quit trying to commit suicide before they were given deals for prison times."

"Cult?"

"To Izzy.   They decided she's a sign of the apocalypse and a saint sent here to guard the faithful."

"Ah.   What did they do?"

"They took her from daycare.   I stopped myself and the FBI got there very quickly."

"Good!" he decided, looking down at the baby.   "Thanks for the spear."

"Not an issue."

"John said something about the ATF and FBI raiding Sunnydale."

"They wanted to confiscate what the demons were running for weapons."

"Yours?"

"One of the agents respects what I do and only wanted an inventory list in case something seriously went wrong.   I even updated it after I talked to Caleb last time."

"You sold some of it?"

"I didn't need that much artillery.   I hope."   He frowned but let it clear up.   "So we're taking a short roadtrip for my temper and so they can quit trying to cut their wrists so God can have them back."

Bobby smiled.   "How bad was it?"

"I fired this nice missile that imbedded tiny metal spikes into the front of their church, tied it to the back of my car, and let Buffy drive off with the front of their church."

"Ah."   He handed the baby back.   "Here, she probably calms you down."

"More often then not."   Bobby smiled.   "So we're traveling.   Sam wanted me to stop in at the Roadhouse but I have no idea where that is."   He grinned.   "Look, she's smiling and it's not gas.   She likes you, Uncle Bobby."

Bobby smiled back.   "She's a happy, good girl."

"Most of the time.   She still cries when bad guys get near her.   That's how we found out the demon was pretending to be Dean the last time."

"Good!"   He shook his head.   "Anyone else know you're traveling?"

"I emailed Dean and Sam."

"Makes sense to me."   He brushed down some of her hair.   "Anything else you think you should see?"

Xander shrugged.   "Don't know."

"We'll tell Ellen you're coming."

"Tomorrow.   We've got a short traveling time with her.   We're at the motel locally for the night."

"That's fine, kid."    He smiled.   "I'll let her know anyway."   He winked and stood up.   "Any big problems out there?"

"Not at the moment.   A lot of vamps for some reason.    We think there's a few new masters in town but Buffy says she has it."

"She sure?"

"She said she was.   I made sure enough times that I pissed her off."

"That's fine then, Xander.   Go ahead to the motel, let the little one sleep.   I'll call Ellen.   Why didn't you show up at the house?"

"I have no idea where it is."

Bobby laughed.   "We'll fix that oversight."   Xander grinned.   "Go ahead.   I'll bring dinner in a bit.   Still want chicken?"   Xander shuddered.   "Figures," he teased.

"Mexican?"

"We have one place."   Xander handed over money then went to the car.   Bobby smiled.   That boy did seem to pull his own weight but he wondered why the girls had sent him away this time.   Master vamps sounded like something they'd need help with.   On the way to the Mexican place he called out there.   "Buffy, Bobby Singer.   You sure you don't need Xander for a bit?"   He heard her complain about how she wasn't getting any patrols in because things were slowing down for the summer.   "You certain?   He came to get introduced to a few hunters Sam wanted to have him meet.   Yes, with her.   She smiled earlier."   She cooed at that.   "You sure you're okay?"   He laughed at her fussing.   "Fine.  I'll let you get back to your homework and stuff."

He hung up and walked over to his car, heading to get them dinner.   Though he did call John.   "Buffy banished Xander for a while.   Said there wasn't anything to do and the FBI wanted him out of the cult's way so they'd quit trying to kill themselves to get away from him."   He laughed at the complaint.   "Apparently the boy made them sorry for touching her again."   He listened to the report John had gotten from a contact.   "I'm impressed he stopped them.   Here.   Motel.   Sammy wanted him to meet Ellen."   He smirked.   "He didn't know where it was.   She smiled earlier too."   He hung up and decided Mexican was a good idea for dinner.   He needed some spices now and then to cheer up his drab, bad guy laden world.

***

Xander stepped into the bar and looked around.   "This is nice, huh, Izzy?"   She yawned at him.   "I know, you're tired.   Sorry."   He smiled at the curious woman behind the bar.   "Hi.   Sammy said I should come meet Ellen."

"Sam Winchester?" she asked, looking confused.   He nodded.   "Why do you look familiar?"

"Because he's the reason the worlds merged," a drunk male voice complained.

"That was Willow.   It was an accidental wish."

"You had the lock pin."

"Yeah and if I hadn't, my world could've been destroyed while I was still here."   The guy shut up.   He shifted the baby some.   "Are you Ellen?"

"I'm Jo."

"Sam said I'd probably meet you too."   She smirked a little bit at that.   "This is Izzy."

"You named your daughter Izzy?" an older woman asked as she came out to join them.

"Isabelle."

Ellen smiled.   "Bobby said you'd be coming, Xander.   Go ahead and sit at the bar.   She'll be safe here.   So will you."

"I know I will.    I'm not sure she'll like the booze smells."

"It's all right."   She got them settled and looked at the little girl.   "Jo was your size once, Izzy."   The baby made a fist a few times.   "Why're you off the hellmouth?"

"Buffy said so."

Ellen laughed.   "That bad?"

"The FBI wanted the cult to quit trying to kill themselves and Buffy said all it is is master vamps so she'd go with their plan."   Ellen looked confused.   "Izzy has a cult to her.   They decided she's a saint since I gave birth to her."

"No baby's a saint unless they're sleeping," the drunk guy said.

"She tries really hard," Xander said, looking over.   "You're a watcher.   Aren't you?"   He nodded, looking smug.   "Travers' jaw still wired shut?"   The guy gaped.   "He made rude comments to Buffy."    He turned back around.   "Anyway, Sam said I should come meet you since we're off on a short road trip."

"It's nice to meet you in person."   She shook his hand and patted the baby on the foot, getting a few more scrunched up fists being made.   "She is cute."

"Everyone says that," he said with a grin.   "Cordy wanted to put her in ads."

"She'd make some money but it'd be soul sucking for her."

"No, I want her to be normal.   If she starts hunting before eighteen I get to spank."   Ellen laughed.   "I started just before sixteen.   I don't want her to do the same things I did."

"I can understand that.   I didn't want my daughter to start hunting either."   She gave him a look.   "You know she'll see you doing it and wonder."

"By the time she's old enough to understand I'll have explained it to her without making her want to try it.   I might even try to make her a bit paranoid."

"That'll mean she'll worry about you."

"I worry about me," he admitted.   "But I'll emphasize it's training that makes it safer."

"Good.   It's a good plan.   Might not work."

"That's why she can't start before she's eighteen, or old enough to drink."

"That's definitely been a help to many of us."   The door opened and Dean stomped in.   "No pretty girls to hit on?" she taunted with a smirk.

"Sammy's got the flu."   He sat down next to Xander.   "Hey, princess."   She smiled.   "Gas?"

"No, she's old enough to actually smile now."   Dean beamed at that.   "Flu?"

"Yeah, puked nasty crap earlier.   I nearly shoved him out of the car so he didn't puke in her."

"I'm sorry he's sick."   He punched him on the arm.   "The cult is slitting their wrists so they can meet God and get corrected."

"Dad heard."

"Figured he had a spy already," he sighed.   "Spike?"

"Yup."   They shared a smirk.   "That date go okay?"

"She didn't try to kill me afterward."

"That's new," Dean taunted.

"Buffy said that's because my evil drawing powers are what gives her the sense to cry when they come near her."

"Buffy?" Ellen asked.

"Izzy.   She'll throw a fit if something bad comes near her."   That got a smile and a pat on the baby's foot.   "Can I have a rootbeer, Ellen?   Please?"

"Sure, Xander.   Dean, you driving later?"

"Sometime later."   She handed him a bottle of beer.   Xander got his rootbeer and paid.   "How she doing otherwise?"

"Not too bad.    The diaper issue is better, but not great yet.   She got the upset belly last week."

"I'm about to run a tube from Sammy's ass out the window and past the end of the car."   Xander cackled.   "Four stops in under an hour, I swear."

"Bad mexican food?" Xander asked.

"I don't know.   I don't care.   I just want it to stop."   Sam walked in yawning.   "About time you got up, bitch."

"Shut up, jerk.   I'm sick."

"Then don't come near the baby.   She had it last week," Xander told him.   Sam beamed.   "The Feds wanted me away from the cult so they'd quit trying to commit suicide."

"If I were them, I'd pray to God to get right with him before I pissed him off that way," Sam said dryly, sitting on Xander's other side.   "Hi, Izzy."   She fussed.   "I'm sick, sweetie, I can't pick you up.   I don't want you to be sick."   He pulled her closer to smell.   "Why do you smell like Irish Spring?"

"I forgot her soap," Xander admitted.   "She likes it and it's not hurting her any."   He took a sip.   "If she starts to puke or run like you've been, you're babysitting until she's well."

"I will.    I'm trying not to give it to her, Xander."   He smiled at her.   "How's the princess?   Are you having a happy day?"   She smiled.   "Real smile?"   Xander nodded.   "That's so cool!" he breathed.   "That's a big step, Izzy.   We should have pictures of that.   Do it again for me?"   He snapped a few with his phone.   "There, that'll go on the computer so we can send it to Dad."

"Don't forget Caleb."   He looked at Xander.   "He said she's the cutest little evil creature ever."

"Does he think all kids are?"   Ellen nodded.   "Then that's fine."   The watcher got up to come over.   "Dude, no alcohol near the baby," Xander warned.   "Especially not from a watcher."

"They'll take her like any slayer," he sneered.

"That's funny since she's not one," Xander shot back.   "Even Travers knows that."   The guy looked stunned.    "She's fully normal.   Thank you for asking.   Now get away from my daughter."   He made a grab for her foot but Xander's elbow and the guy's throat met.   The guy was gasping on the floor before he could do anything else.

Dean looked down.   "Be thankful it's not hormone swings.   They were worse."

"Not cute," Xander warned.

"Yes I am.   All the girls say so," Dean shot back with a grin.

Xander shrugged.   "If I knew a thing about gay sex I'd tell you if you were a gayboy fantasy or not, Dean, but all I know about it is what Anya told me about some of her demon playmates and former jobs."

Sam shuddered.   "I can't even imagine how unpretty those stories were."

"Probably not unless you heard them too.   Oh, she's getting her powers back soon.   She's dating some dirtbag who's cheating on her.   On purpose."

"He that bad?" Dean asked.

"He's got three babies he's never seen and one baby's momma that he's ignoring because she took him to the state for support; so he quit his job so he didn't have to pay."

"So this time she's going to be over outraged women instead of scorned women?" Ellen asked.   Xander grinned but nodded.   "Sounds like a plan if she wants it back."

"She said she does."   He shrugged.   "She misses the old days sometimes."

"Don't we all," Dean sighed, shaking his head.   "I was even more adorable then."   Sammy got up and headed for the bathroom.   "I'm so attaching that hose to his ass."

Xander cackled.   "Remember, superglue and body parts don't mix, Dean."

"It'd come off eventually."

"Then he couldn't run, hunt, or play beside you," Ellen pointed out.

Dean considered it.   "He could stay in the car until he figured out how to wind it up when it's not in use."

Jo grimaced at the noise coming from the bathroom.   "Sounds more like the revenge of the bad chinese food to me."

"Or Mexican water," Xander agreed.   Ellen and Dean both shuddered at that.   "Oh, Dean.   Willow said if you piss her off again she's going to put your record back."

"What'd I do this time?"

"You're male and you don't think she'll fully get over the magic addiction."   He took another drink.   "I told her if she did that, me, you guys, the weapons, and the baby were all moving to Mexico.   Tara about pouted her to death for it."

Dean grinned.   "I like Tara, she has sense."

"So do I.   Because Willow did try the memory thing the other day.   They had a fight about Willow wanting to try little spells again."   They shared a look.   "So, east, west coast of Mexico?   In the middle?"

"I hear Brazil's full of babes," Sam said as he joined them again.   "Hi, Izzy.   Sorry I abandoned you for the bathroom.   Some year soon you'll understand about the bathroom stuff."   He sat down again.   "Willow?"

"Yup," Xander agreed.   "We got onto her when we learned what she had done.   Giles nearly spanked her before calling her mentor."   He finished his rootbeer, putting the glass bottle into the trash behind the bar with a neat toss.   "Now if only I could do that with tissues."

"They don't fly very well," Dean pointed out.   He finished his beer but Jo took the bottle before he could toss it.   "Thanks, Jo."

"Welcome, Dean.   Didn't want to clean up the broken glass."

"I'm a good shot," he complained.   Xander put his wrist on Dean's head.   "Xander, you're not my mommy too."

"You're still running a fever, Dean."   Dean groaned, shaking off his hand.   "I've got Immodium in the car's first aid kit."

"I'll be fine."

"You're going to need the hose you want to put on Sammy's butt," Jo teased.

Sam gave her an odd look then Dean one.   "I don't need an enema and I'm not your type, Dean."

"I was going to stick one up there so you didn't need so many pit stops, Sammy."

"You do and I'm kicking your ass."

"You and what army, bitch?" he taunted.   Sam pointed at Xander.   "He's not an army."

Xander gave him a look.   "Are you sure about that?"   Dean cackled, shaking his head.   Izzy let out a wail and all three were attending to her.   "I'm sorry, were we ignoring you?" Xander taunted.   She sniffled.   He sniffed.   "Yeah, that's a good reason."   He got the diaper bag on his shoulder then took her from the patting hands.   "Is there a good place to change her, Ellen?"

"Back porch?" she asked hopefully.   "With the barrel out there?"   He shrugged so she led him back there.   He changed her and made her happier.   The stink was outside so Ellen was happy too.   They came back to find a few other hunters now in the bar getting beers.   "Boys, play nice tonight.   Xander's got his daughter in with him."

One looked at her.   "You're tiny."

Xander nodded.   "Very.   But she's got a strong kick on her."   They all laughed and went to their table.   He sat down, letting the boys steal his daughter again.

"I thought you weren't a baby kissing kind of guy?" Jo taunted.

"Xander's might as well be family," Dean told her.

"Why?" Ellen asked.

Xander gave him a look then looked at Izzy then at her.    "She was the lock."

"Oh," she moaned, shaking her head.

"We're not letting anyone know outside of family," Xander said quietly.   "Too many want her other daddy."

"I can agree to that.   So, Dean, enjoying it?"

"I'm a great uncle and I'll spoil her rotten while teaching her necessary things," he said.

"As long as she can't hunt demons before she's eighteen," Xander reminded him. "But by all means, teach her to shoot the idiot boys she'll draw before then."   Dean cackled, nodding a bit.   "By the way, you do know John said that he hopes she's not as free as you are with your attentions?"

Dean looked at him.   "I'm not the slut everyone thinks I am."

"Willow still thinks you're doing Sam."

Sam moaned, shaking his head.   "Not my type."

"Or else you might be having one the natural way," Dean taunted quietly.

Xander shook his head.   "There's no connection to any other part of my body.   That would take another mean witch who wanted me to suffer and be kicked."

"You mean you had her?" Jo asked.   Xander nodded.   "Why?"

"Had to.   Otherwise my whole world could've been destroyed, Jo.   Not that I don't love her anyway.   I do.   It just took me some time to get there.   The first thing I knew, I was waking up in the hospital with a nurse telling me I was delusional because the ER said I was pregnant and Dean was coming in to ask me questions in Fed disguise."

"I've heard he does that pretty well," Ellen said, giving Dean a dirty look.

"I learned it off Dad," he defended.

"I have no doubt of that."   She looked at the baby then at Sam.   "If you're that sick, you should be in bed."

"I know," Sam sighed, smiling at the baby.   "We can hit the same motel you guys are.   That way we can spend some Izzy time."

"Remember, if she gets that sick, you're babysitting her," Xander warned.

"I will."   He picked her up to hug.   "Such a nice girl."   She sucked on his throat.   "Thanks, princess.   That's a good benediction for me."   He handed her over.   She pouted. "Awww."   He took a picture of that face too, showing it to Xander since he couldn't see it.

"That's her 'you quit spoiling me' face," Xander said.   "She gives it to Tara a lot when she has to go to class."

"It's adorable," Sam cooed.   He let Dean see.

Dean shook his head.   "Not even six whole months old and you're already wrapping guys around your fingers," he said, taking her to hold.   "C'mere, let's get you away from sick Uncle Sammy.   Before someone has to implant a hose in you too."

"Don't even think about it," Sam said, stealing her back.   "C'mon, let's get back to the motel so I can take a nap and get better so we can play before you have to go back home."

"We're up the road," Xander said with a point.

"That's a rough place," Jo complained.

Xander looked at her.   "Yeah, but it's cheap and I can handle a bit of roughness, Jo.   Not like I don't patrol out in Sunnydale most every night."

She stared.   "Ghosts?"

"Vamps, lower demons, nasty stuff that has a lot of slime and goo usually."   She shuddered, whimpering as she walked off.   "You can come hunt vamps in our town if your mom lets you," he called after her.

"Not a chance," Ellen called from where she was talking to someone.

"Okay.   We're going to put the uncles to bed.   Before they infect her."

"Sure, kid.   Tomorrow?" she asked.

Xander grinned.   "Okay."   He took his daughter back.   "Hey, precious."   She pouted at him.   "Not like they have a baby seat in the back of the Impala.   Your Uncle Dean said the car is too cool to have one of those ever again."   He walked off with her, coming back for her diaper bag once he remembered it.   Dean and Sam followed, giving them a very strange honor guard all the way back.   Even if Sam did rush into the bathroom as soon as they got there.   Dean took over their bathroom since Sammy wasn't out in time.   Xander shook his head, looking at his little girl.   "Let's hope you don't get that too, Izzy.   It's really nasty and it smells worse than your diapers."   He reached in to flip on the fan without looking at Dean, then closed the door and went back to playing with the baby.   She cooed at him, smiling and playing with his fingers.   "That's a good job, Izzy."

Dean came out after washing his hands.   "That's better."

Xander looked at him.   "Smells worse than her diapers, Dean."

"Sorry.   Can't help that."   He shrugged, coming over to give her a hug.   Then he went to bed when Xander stole her back.   He knew it made good sense.   Even if he was pouting.   Not that he'd admit it, and if caught he could say he was really sick.

***

Five days later Xander opened the door, looking at the cop standing there while he tried to get Izzy to calm down.   "I'm sorry she's wailing, but her uncles gave her the flu," he said over the crying.   "I've called our doc and she's got medicine but she feels miserable."

The officer stepped in, looking at her.   "You could take her to the ER."

"I have medicine."   He pointed at one of the bags on the table.   He put her down and gave her a pacifier.   "Try that for a minute, okay?"   He dug into the bag, finding the instructions.   "This is what our pediatrician said to give her."

The officer nodded.   "I can understand that."   He looked around at the slight mess.   Xander grimaced and cleaned.   "I know you haven't had a chance recently, sir."

Xander looked at him after tossing out an empty bag.   "I should be heading home but I can't travel with her like this."

"I understand."   The baby spit out her pacifier and set up another wail.   "She's loud."

"Very loud."   He picked her up.   "Shh, I'm trying," he whispered.   "I'm really trying."   He kissed her forehead.   "What time is it?"

The officer checked his watch then looked at him.   "Seven."

"It's time for more tylenol.   Can you...."   He smiled and took the baby, letting the young man draw out the medicine for her.   "Here, it's nasty," he cooed, smiling at her.   She made a grossed out face but drank it.   "There, that should help."   He kissed her on the forehead, then put the bottle down once it was resealed.   He took her back.   "Thank you."

"You're welcome.   Her uncles had it?"

"Both uncles had it and I warned them they'd have to babysit but they had a family emergency and had to run off once their runs stopped."   He bounced a bit but held her head still.   "I'm not shaking her."

"I know.   You're doing fine, kid.   Your first?"   Xander nodded, looking pitiful.   "It'll be fine.   I've got three.   They all go through this sometime."

"I have to go through it again?" he asked, looking horrified.

The officer laughed.   "You never know, kid."   He looked at her.   "She's adorable."

"She went through forty-eight diapers in just over a day.   I rigged up a way for her to sit on the potty.   It was easier."

"That takes some brains."   Xander grinned.   "I'll tell them why."

"I did.   I'm sorry I'm keeping people up.   I'd head home but I can't travel with her like this."

"I know, kid.   Don't worry about it.   I'll make sure you're good."   He left, going to talk to the owner of the motel.   "The kid has the flu really badly.   They've talked to her normal doctor.   They have medicine.   She'll probably be over it in a few days."

"Those two uncles of hers ran off," he complained.

"The kid said it was a family emergency.   Or else he told them if they gave it to her, they'd be babysitting."   That got an evil smirk.   The boy came out to get a soda, standing outside the door to get some air.   He leaned out.   "She okay?"

"Still fussing.   I need an air break.   She can't hurt herself laying on her back on the bed."   He took another drink.   "I hate her being sick."

The owner leaned out.   "She can't roll over?"

Xander shook his head.   "She's been trying but she can't yet."

"Good.   Don't do anything rash."

"Her fever spikes any higher and we'll be hitting the ER," he promised.   "Our pediatrician said so."   That got a nod from the cop.   Xander looked at the guy sneaking toward his door.   "Do not try it," he snarled.   The man stopped.   "Back away from my daughter.   Now!" he shouted when he didn't.   The guy stayed frozen, giving him a horrified look.   "Right the hell now," he snarled, moving closer.   The man ran back to the car, hiding inside it.   He took another drink of his soda, looking at the stunned officer.   He pulled out the card.   "This is the FBI agent who arrested the cult to my daughter."   He handed it over.   "If and when you talk to him, tell him she got the flu from her Uncle Sammy?"

"Sure."   He nodded slowly.   "Cult?"   Xander lifted his shirt to show the surgical marks.   The officer swallowed.   "I heard about that."

Xander put down his shirt.   "Yeah.   He's one.   I think he's on probation."   He pulled the officer's gun and turned around, pointing it at him.   "Get away from my daughter!" he shouted.   The man froze, then stared at him, laughing nervously.   "Back.   Now.   Before I have to get mean.   You know very well I can and will."   The man backed off slowly.   "Further."   The man ran for the room.   Xander tossed the cop his gun and put down his soda before blindsiding the guy.   He beat him a few times then looked down at him.   "Did you not learn how to listen to orders?"

"You're fouling her!   She's not good with you!   You're tainting her!" he wailed.

Xander slugged him again, knocking him out.   "Yeah, right," he snarled.   He got off him and picked up his soda, going back to his daughter.   "It's all right, baby.   The nasty cult member won't be coming back."   She burped and he knew, just knew.   He took her outside, letting her puke into a bush.   "Thank you."   The owner made a horrified noise.   "I'll cover it with some sand," he offered.   "I didn't want to clean up the carpet."   The owner walked off shuddering.   "Sorry."   He let her finish with some back pats to keep her calm and help her.   "There you go."   He took her inside to clean up.

The officer did the smart thing since this was clearly a federal matter.   He called the agent on the card.   "Sir, Mr. Harris said that the baby's Uncle Sammy gave her the flu.   That was right before someone he identified as a cult member tried to get in to help the crying little thing.   Flu, yes, sir.   I can send you that, sir, but it'll take a few hours for him to wake up.   No, Mr. Harris took care of him after grabbing my gun."

Xander came out to get into his trunk, getting some sand he used as a counterweight.   He poured it over the mess.   "Sorry but I was faster.   Tell Don I said hi."   He waved a hand and finished covering the mess.   "If she does that again, we're going to the ER."   He put the rest of the sand back then went back into the room, walking over the body.

"Sir, is he normal?" the officer asked the agent.   He heard his opinion.   "Okay then.   Sure.   I can do that once he wakes up and gives us his information.   Knocked him out, yes, sir."   He laughed.   "We can do that.   No, she's fairly ill.   He's called his normal doctor but she's had it bad."   Xander came out with his keys and the baby under one arm.   "Lock the door; I'll take you," he promised.   He said something quietly then hung up, calling his partner over the radio to come get the guy while he took him and the baby to the ER.   "Carseat?"   Xander got his out of the back of his car and installed it quickly and away they went.   He walked him into the ER personally.   "Flu," he told the nurse.

Xander handed over the bag of medicine and the instructions.   "This is what my doc said but she's still got a fever and she's started puking.   Nasty, icky crap.   She just had some tylenol but it's possible she puked it too."

"Okay," the nurse agreed.   "Pedialyte?"

"Of course.   And some thinned down pediasure too," he said with a slight grin.   "Izzy likes it."   She puked again and he managed to point her at a plant after the first few mouthfuls.   "Sorry," he said sheepishly.

"We have people to clean that up," she promised.    "C'mon.   How long has she been sick?"

"Three days.   Her favorite uncles gave it to her; they knew they were supposed to babysit her if she got sick but they had a family emergency and left me with the sick baby."

"I know how that is," she soothed, putting them into a room.   "Let's get the paperwork."   She got the forms and told the doctor.   She came back with the doctor.   "Go ahead and put her down on the bed, sir."

"Xander, sorry."

"How long since you slept?" the doctor asked gently.

"Two days.   She ended up sitting on the potty because she blew through diapers as soon as I put them on her.   She went through forty-eight."

"I understand, sir.   What's your doctor's name?"   Xander got into his phone to get her name and number.   "Let me call her.   Okay?"   Xander nodded.   "Why don't you sit and let the nurses watch her.   We promise we won't move her from here."

"Her cult," he groaned.

The nurse looked at him.   "I've heard about that.   She's adorable but clearly not sent by God."   Xander relaxed, nodding and sitting beside the table.   She smiled at the girl.   "You have a very fussy daddy."   He nodded, cracking her up.   "You try to rest for a few minutes.   If we have to admit her, we'll put her in a room where you can have a cot."   She moved to check the baby over.   He relaxed some but didn't fall asleep.   The doctor came back with the faxed records and it was good.   "He was doing as ordered?"

"He was.   Sometimes the babies get sicker than you expect."   She worked on getting some blood.   Xander whimpered but they ignored him since she only fussed.   She puked again and the nurse managed it for him.   She even swatted him when he tried to help.   He pouted but they ignored that too.

***

Xander woke up in the morning, looking at his daughter.   "You look so much better.   Did you sleep too?"

The nurse leaned in then came in with a cup of coffee for him.   "We gave her a baby sized dose of anti-flu medicine.   She's done much better all night.   Her fever's gone."   Xander beamed, pulling her down to give her a hug.   "You're welcome.   Go back to the motel.   She should be able to travel tomorrow, Mr. Harris."

"I love you guys.   Thank you.   Papers?"

"Let the doctor check her one last time."   He nodded, letting her go.   She smiled at the happier baby, going to get the doctor up.   They came back and found him changing her diaper.   "Still a bit loose."

"It usually is," he admitted with a grimace.   "This is looser than normal but still disgusting."

"It happens," the doctor agreed.   "Keep up the pedialyte."   Xander nodded.   "Otherwise, let me check her over.   Finish your coffee."   Xander let her have the baby while he gulped the strong, black coffee.   She handed her over and he beamed.   "She'll be fine.   Give it a day or two and then travel."   He nodded.   "Good boy."   She patted him on the head, handing him a lollipop, getting a shy smile for it.   "You yell at those uncles of hers."   She went to get the papers for him.

He signed them out and went back to the motel to clean up their mess from when he couldn't sleep and they went to bed.   He laid down on the bed, her carefully under his arm, no sheet or anything over them.   That way if she had problems he'd know.

***

Xander drove onto the salvage yard, getting out and opening the back door of the car, handing him Izzy and her diaperbag.   "Sunnydale's on the news.   There's been multiple fires and it looks like her cult," he said quietly.   "Can you call John or them?"

"Not a problem," he promised.   "I watched Sammy at this age too, Xander."   Xander relaxed, nodding slightly.   "You sure you can handle it?"

"Hopefully.   Shouldn't be more than a week."   He called, leaning on his hood.   "Dawn, it's Xander," he said once she answered on the speaker.    "I saw the news.   What the fuck, young lady?"

"Xander, thank god.   We weren't sure where you are.   Is Izzy there?"

"Yup," he assured her.   "Where's everyone else?   I'm on my way back.   She's got a sitter."

"Buffy's missing, Willow and Tara guarded our stuff.    We have no idea but we think it's the cult reacting to being on bail."   Xander groaned.   "All we know is they tried to burn city hall last night.   It's really nasty."

"Okay.   You relax.   I'm coming.   It'll be a few days.   I'm in North Dakota at the moment."

"Three days?" she asked, sounding a bit wobbly.

"It's all interstate so maybe less time," he promised.

"Thanks.   The teacher's giving me dirty looks.   Gotta go."   She hung up.

Xander called Willow's phone, getting Giles.   "It's me.   Give me some sort of affirmative or negative response.   Are they there with you?"

"Oh, dear," he sighed.   "Yes, that was something I had feared, Amber."

Xander grimaced.   "Did they get my stuff?"

"No, lord no."

"Even better.   I'll be back in a few days.   If they ask, tell them it'll be four days, Giles.   I'm in North Dakota."   He hung up when someone grabbed the phone from him.   He looked at Bobby.

"Go," he said calmly.   "I've got her.   I can get John or Dean and Sam back within a day.   We'll be fine."

Xander pointed at the bag.   "Her tylenol and instructions are in there.   Give her a lot of pedialyte.   She likes the pediasure when you cut it in half with cold water.   She's better and mostly over the flu but it's still messy diapers."   Bobby grimaced but nodded.   "She was fine, the hospital got her back to healthy after the nice officer drove us there because she didn't quit crying for two days.   She was so bad I had to rig up a way to sit her on the toilet, Bobby."

"That's bad."

"From Sam and Dean.   So smack them for me?"   He looked at her, running a finger down her nose.   "Daddy will be back very soon.   You be safe with Uncle Bobby until Grandpa or someone gets here to help him with your fussy nature.   Oh, reading?   Loves it."   He smiled.   "You sure?"

"You can't bring her.   It's sounding bad, kid.   Go."   Xander nodded, sliding into the car and driving off.   He looked down at her.   "He's one fussy mother," he told her.   She smiled.   "It's good you agree with me."   He dropped the diaper bag so he could dig out his phone, shuffling her to the other arm to hold since it was in his other pocket.   "Xander just dropped Izzy off on me because Sunnydale's on the news.   Her cult's started to burn parts of Sunnydale and they're holding Giles hostage.   We're fine.   She's over the flu the boys gave her.   I was warned you're going to have many nasty diapers to change too, John."   He hung up.   She cooed at him.   He grinned back.   "C'mon, it's too bright out here for you."   He grabbed the bag, bringing her inside the house.   "Hasn't been too many girls in here.   Sorry about al the guy stuff."   She was still happy so he was.   At least until the first diaper.

***

Xander stepped off the plane, finding someone waiting on him, trying to be subtle apparently.   He pounced him into the wall, staring at him.   "Graham.   Is this your doing?"

"We're coming in to solve it.   No one knows where Buffy is."

"Dawn said that."   He let him up, staring at him.   "Did they get my place?"   Graham shook his head.   "Then you can follow me."

"We're military, Harris."

"And I know that town better than every one of you.   Beyond that, they want my daughter.   Thankfully, she's got an understanding other side of the family."

"You dumped Anya?"

"She dumped me when she found out I was pregnant.   Let's go."   Graham got up and followed him.   Xander had rented a car online from the other end of his trip.   So all he had to do was sign and head out.   Graham followed him.   Xander found the area he wanted to start in, pulling in and parking.   He got out, whistling quietly then nodding.   Graham called the others while Xander opened the underground portal.

"Why the sewer?" Riley asked when he joined them.

"You guys clearly never went into them.   The old mayor created them as walkways for when you couldn't be above ground."   He sild down the ladder, landing on the pathway.   He looked up.   "C'mon."   He walked off, heading toward his usual haunts.   "Have they gotten into my storage area?" he asked quietly.

"Not yet," Riley said.   "Are we?"

"I have the trap door locked with a single key slot deadlock.   Unless we can get a telekinetic demon, no."    That got a groan.   "That doesn't mean there's not others nearby.  Or Willie's."    He led them to Willie's and up, pointing at two.   They followed him up and he snuck out, pulling Willie into the back while covering his mouth.   He stared at him.   "I want a sit rep, Willie.   Now."

The demon bartender licked his lips.   "I don't know what you want to hear, Harris."

"Bull.   Where are they?   Who else is in town?   And where is Buffy?"

"The new mayor's people have her somewhere.   They knocked her out with a dart and tied her up, then drove her off.   No one's sure where."   Xander nodded slowly.   "They're mostly downtown.   They're arguing with the mayor but she's using it to her advantage."   Xander nodded more quickly.   "The witches have guarded your things and the FBI is trying to sneak in too."

"Good.   Do we have any TK demons?"   Willie shook his head.   "That's fine."   He moved closer.   "You did not see me, hear me, talk to me, Willie.   At all.   Am I clear?" he said coldly.

"Clear," he agreed, backing up a step, licking his lips again.   "You're not here."

"I told them I'd be here in three days."   That got a fast nod.   "Go.   Someone just came in."   They disappeared back into the sewers and Xander led them to the area where his storage area was.   He came up one of the empty areas, looking around before waving them up.   "I'm there," he said quietly with a point.   "There's at least one Fed there."   They could hear them calling for him.   They nodded.   "Free the Feds or secure the area and let me free them."

"Secure the area and we'll move in," Riley said.   They checked outside then snuck out to secure the town.

Xander checked then snuck over to his secured area.   He found Don Epps in there.   "Hiding?" he hissed.   Don nodded quickly.   "Any of yours?   I came up with Finn."

"They've got Colby around here somewhere."

Xander took his phone to text him about the area near him.   He got back a 'found the door' and smiled.   He ordered him to grab a gun.   He handed it back.   "Tell him Finn's guys are military.   Make a distraction and move somewhere safer."   Don did that.   Xander got what he wanted and handed Don something.   "Looking kinda weak.   Those are tranqs."   He put something into his pocket.   "They have Buffy somewhere."

"I'm sorry."

"Not your fault."   He shrugged.   The cult members were getting upset in the next area.   Xander found a gas canister and slid it over there, setting it off.   They choked and ran out.   He and Don escaped under cover of the smoke.   They came up on some of the cult.   Xander sneered.   "Don't try."   They tried and Xander tranqed them.   They went down.   It was pretty to him.   They ran off and he sent Don to help his guy.   He ran into Riley.   "I need a doll or baby demon," he said in his ear, getting an odd look.   Riley nodded finally.    They headed to get one from Willie.   They came back with a wrapped baby and the parent of the baby demon.   It whispered something to Xander.   "Perfect.   Thank you.   I'll make sure he's safe."   The demon nodded and they faded into the night.   They let themselves be caught closer to town.   They all stared at the baby in his arms.   One demanded he hand her over.   So he shot him.   They went down and the rest escorted him to the new headquarters.

"Give us our saint," the leader sneered.   "That way she's not fouled by your touch any more."   Xander whispered at the baby, putting it down.   It disappeared.   The leader and others gasped, then started to fight.

Xander punched the one that came at him.   "Proves you're not worthy, huh?"   He heard his rescue.   "Now!" he shouted.   Riley's guys rushed in with the FBI behind them.   Xander got the few he could down.   The others got the rest.    Xander looked around, wiping the blood off his mouth.   Then he looked at Riley.   "We have to find Buffy," he said quietly.   One of them moaned at that name so he hauled them up to get into their face.  "Where is she?" he snarled, inches from his face.   "Tell me now or tell her ex, the commando."

"The mayor took her to Regent Street," he whimpered, trying to back away.

Xander blinked.   "Regent Street?   The nest?"   He shuddered so Xander let him fall.   "We'll need some strong stomachs," he said, walking past Riley's guys.   "That's a nest."   They shuddered but followed.   "Someone find me Spike!" he shouted, breaking into a jog.   He knew something was wrong now.   He found the nest easily enough.   It was the largest in the city and Buffy had been planning on taking it out while he was gone.   He stopped to watch, frowning.   He heard someone gasp and looked back at Spike.   "The mayor's people dropped her in there."   He held up something, getting a nod.   "Second wave, and you take her to Angel," he ordered quietly.

"You sure?"

Xander pointed.   "She's tied up, Spike."   Spike shuddered.   "If anyone can make her sane, it's Angel.   If we have to, Willow can soul her later."   Spike nodded briefly, putting out his cigarette.   Xander turned and bounced the canister in his hand a few times before whistling then throwing the canister into the nest.   The vampires screamed as the lights came out.   They walked in to dust the rest.   Buffy was still tied up on the bed.   Her arms were bound behind her.   Her ankles were bound too.   He stared down at her.   "Someone will get them for you," he told her.

She yawned.   "What's going on, Xander?"

Xander handed her to Spike.   "Right to Angel.   No stopping."

"Agreed."   He grimaced.   "It's not going to be pretty later."

Xander looked around.   "Don't worry about it.   I'll call Wes to warn him."   That got a nod and Spike carried her out.

"I'm not a sack of clothes," she complained.   "Hi, Graham."

"Hey, Buffy."   He stared at her vamped face.   She gave him a confused look.   He pointed at her forehead.   Xander came out to run his finger over the ridges.   She shuddered, flinching away.   "He'll help you," Graham said.

Xander nodded.   "He will.   If we have to, we'll have Willow soul you too," he said quietly.   She burst out crying.   "We'll watch your mom and Dawn, Buffy.   Go with Spike."   She nodded, letting him carry her off.   He looked at Graham.   "Not the first friend we've had to see vamped."

"Which is why you're insane to stay in the business, Harris."

Xander nodded.   "Sometimes."    He went to clean up the nest, taking their stuff to drop off at Goodwill then heading back to his area.   He ran into Willow and Tara outside the Magic Box.   "We need to call inside."   He walked in and grabbed the phone, dialing out while Giles protested.   "Wes, Xander.   Bad news."   He listened.   "I'm sorry you guys have had a shitty night but the cult to Izzy tried to take over the town and the mayor's people used it to sedate and kidnap Buffy.   They dropped her into a nest bound."   He looked at Giles.   "I have Spike bringing her to Angel.   She didn't realize she woke up that way."   Giles shuddered.   "If we have to, Willow can soul spell her.   Right now, it's not safe and we'll need Faith out of jail.   I know she's in real jail instead of Council custody.   I'm sure someone can try.   I don't know but she's still bound unless he released her.   Thanks."   He hung up, looking at Giles, then at the witches.   "Riley."

"We can hold the town until Faith gets here.   Is she sane?"

"She's healed a lot of stuff in prison."   He looked at Giles.   "She wasn't aware she was turned, Giles.   That's why I had her sent to Angel.   He can make sure she's sane and see if she needs the soul spell."

"I can get the stuff and be there by tomorrow," Willow promised, moving to get the stuff she'd need.

Xander looked at Giles.   Then at Riley.   "How bad is it?"

"There's nearly a riot across town.   Our guys showed up and they got attacked."

Tara shuddered.   Xander looked at her then at Riley.   "Okay, I'm going to call a bold move.   Willow, sedate the town."   She gasped.   "I know very well you can.   You studied it before we went into the base.   It's just a larger area."   She nodded, finding that spell and pulling Tara to help her.   He leaned into the working area when he thought of something.   "The Feds are all blessed.   They've been splashed with holy water."   She nodded, using that to leave them alone.   Xander waited until it went into effect, looking at Giles.   "Can we hold the town until they get Faith out?"

He shook his head.   "I don't think we can.   She's been fighting with the new masters that recently moved in to try to take over."

Xander looked at Tara, who was shaking and pale.   Then at Willow.   "Then we'll evacuate."   Willow gasped.   "Until it's safe I can't bring Izzy back and I can't keep her with Bobby and John."   She slumped.   "So we'll go."   He looked at Giles.   "Now."   He went to pack.   He looked at Tara then at the agent stomping in.   "There's another slayer."

"I remember that show too."

"She's in the women's jail outside LA."

"Good to know."

"We're not sure it's going to be safe.   For now, people are out."

"Agreed.   Skip," he ordered.   Xander nodded, going to get a truck.   "How long will the spell last?" Don asked calmly.

"A few days at most but it should last longer on the vamps and demons," Willow said.   Tara looked at her.   "That's how it's made."

"Okay," he agreed.   "Go help that Angel guy with Buffy then hide, girls.   When things are ready for you to come back, they'll find you."   They nodded, going to pack their rooms.   He looked at the military guys.   "Can you hold it until they can get Faith out?"

"Of course," Riley agreed.   "We'll probably be a bit more harsh than Buffy was but we're military."

"Orders?"   Riley nodded.   "Good.   I'm here," he said, handing over his card.   "I want to know immediately if things change, you guys get reassigned, or if she gets here."

"Yes, sir," Riley agreed.   Don left and Riley deployed his guys to go help Joyce pack.    They didn't want to see Buffy go after her family.

***

Xander knocked on Joyce's door before walking in, staring at her.   "You'll want to put it down."

"You found her?" Dawn asked.   She put down her and her mom's mugs.

Xander pulled her into a hug, looking at Joyce.   Joyce sat down hard, staring at him.   "The mayor's people darted her on patrol, Joyce."   Dawn got free to stare at him.   "They dropped her tied up into a nest."   Joyce started to sob.   "She's on her way to Angel and Willow can resoul her if necessary," he finished quietly.   He gave her a hug.   "I'm sorry."

She looked up.   "Now what?"

"Now, I've got to warn Faith that they'll be coming to bring her back here.   The rest of us are evacuating until Faith can make it safe again.   We can't hold the town without Willow going all spelly again."   She swallowed and nodded.   "Spike took her to Angel.   She didn't even realize she had been turned."

"Okay," she said, pulling herself back together for Dawn.   "We'll do what we have to do."

"Which is move until Faith can make the town safe," Xander told her.   "Because they'll come for you now.   Without Buffy being around to drive them off, you two are open targets," he said very quietly.   She nodded.   "I can help you."   Someone knocked.   "That's one of Riley's guys."   Dawn went to let him in.   "What's up?"

"Riley sent us to help them move, Mr. Harris."

He looked at Joyce, kissing her on the forehead.   "I'm moving closer to Bobby and the midwest until it's safe.   You guys can gladly come join me."

"We might.   Let's see what the dawn brings," Joyce said.   Xander nodded.   "Soldier, it'll take at least a day to pack here and the gallery."

"If you need it, we can help, ma'am.   Captain Finn was very certain something would come for you when they wake up.   Rosenburg said we have two days."

Xander nodded.   "Good.   We'll need it to clean the Magic Box."   He looked at her.

"Go."

He nodded.   "Call me and I'll bring Izzy back."   He headed to clean out his place and then his storage area.   On the way he called Caleb.   "Can you meet me somewhere?   Because Sunnydale just went to hell, Caleb.   It's not safe for me to keep Izzy here.   Or even be here."   He stopped walking.   "Buffy's been turned, Caleb.   She's on her way to Angel and Willow will probably end up souling her tomorrow if she doesn't stake herself.   Sunnydale's not safe."   He listened.   "That seems pretty fair.   I have two days to clear out.   Everyone's down until then.   No, Willow's spell.    Because Buffy's got a mom and a little sister, Caleb.   Plus now they're going to come after us."

He sighed.   "No, the new mayor's people came after her.   They darted her on patrol and then tied her up before tossing her into the biggest vamp nest in town."   Caleb shuddered, he could hear it.   "So I need to evac.   It's not safe for Izzy.   Really?   How far from Bobby is that?"   He grinned.   "She does like him.   She smiled at him first.   Plus he's got her right now so I could come back and help stop that cult.   I can do that, man.   Thanks.   Yeah, more than easily with what I can find around town.   Thanks."   He hung up and changed his battle plans.   He still went to pack his apartment and his storage area, then he went to hunt down the sleeping bad things so he could rob their nests, caves, lairs, and storage areas.   That way Caleb could have a good selection of what he wanted for that area he knew about.

***

Xander was let into the warden's office.   "I know it's an odd situation but I need to speak to her quickly, sir."

"Is it a family emergency?"

"The woman who was seriously injured is like her sister.   They shared a life at one time."   That got a nod.   "I can promise you can stay.   It'll only take me a minute and then she'll probably be crying for a bit."

"I suppose I can grant it.   I know a few others have asked to see her."

"I'm the forward scout of bad news in this case."   That got a nod and Faith was brought in.   He stood up, looking at her.   "It's bad."

"How bad, X?"

"Buffy's been hurt."

"Like I was?"

"Like Spike was.   He took her to Angel to heal with some help from Willow and her magical fingers."   She stiffened.   He nodded.   He moved closer, glancing at the warden, who shrugged.   He gave her a hug, whispering in her ear.   "Willow knocked them out.   The new mayor's people had her tied up and dropped into a nest."   He pulled back to look at her.   "We're evacing until you and Riley's people can make it safe.   I can't have Izzy in that much danger.   Joyce and Dawn would be in too much danger too."

She nodded.   "I understand that.   Red and her witchy poo?"

"After they visit her, they'll be hiding from it too.   We're very aware we can't hold it.   The cult to Izzy burned down half the town.   It was bad enough that it made national news.   I was off on a roadtrip and there's no way we can hold it.   Though, I did handle some of the issue for you so I could clean up some of their mess.   The cult's mostly gone."

She sighed because that would be some help to her.   "Who else is coming?"

"Wes.   I told him first.   He's making calls."

She nodded, considering it.   "Tweedy?"

"With Buffy.   She'll need him."   He stroked her cheek.   "When you're ready for us to come, you'll call."   He handed over a piece of paper from his pocket.   "That's where I'll be and my phone number."   She looked then smiled at him.   "A friend of a friend found it for me.   We traded some supplies for it until it's safe again.   When you're ready, you call."

"I can do that.   Riley?"

"Finn.   Initiative guy.   They got orders to deal with the town until you or someone like you is back."

She sighed, but nodded.   "Thanks for the head's up."

"You'd expect to hear it from me anyway, Faith.   It's bad, I won't lie.   Buffy's spastic and screaming in anger.   Something about why didn't this happen to one of the ones who went happily to the job instead of her since she never wanted it."

Faith snorted.   "So she becomes the best ever?"

He smirked.   "None of the others had backup.   When you're ready for backup, you'll call and we'll come."

She gave him a fast hug.   "I can agree to that.   Thanks for letting me know she's that bad."

"Not an issue.   Call even if you just wanna talk or hear Izzy babble and coo, Faith.   I'm there when you need me."

"Agreed.   Now go guard my niece.   How long?"

"Tomorrow on Willow's thing.   Riley's guys are there to cover for you."

The warden coughed.   "Someone British did inform us of why she was not the normal prisoner in case someone unwisely tried to attack her."

Xander looked at him.   "The other slayer was killed."   He shuddered.   "So they'll be working on her parole or however."   He looked at her again.   "Oh, strangeness."

"Stranger than Sunnyhell?" she joked.

"FBI agent who has a clue, respected me for what I did, and agreed I needed stuff to do it."

She gaped.   "Way strange.   He five-by-five with us?"

"Yeah.   His cell's below mine."   He smirked.   "He's making Riley update him."

"Cool with me."   She kissed him.   "Go guard my niece.   She's more important."

"Agreed.   When you're ready to be an aunt, you'll call."

"I'll call."   He smiled and gave her another hug then left.   She let herself slowly relax.   "Thank you."

"There's been three others who have asked to speak to you, Miss Lehane."

"Wesley I'd expect."

"Him and two British sorts."

"Wesley I'll talk to.   Them, they can have him translate.  Their Council can blow me."

"Fine, I'll let that be known.   Would you like to talk to the shrink?"

"No, I'm good.   I could use some heavy bag time though."

"I'll have you taken to the gym."   He summoned the guards again.   "Miss Lehane just got bad family news.   She needs some stressing out time in the gym."

He walked her down there, closing her in.   They had seen her working out in the past and it was a thing of beauty.   Today they just wanted out of the way with the look on her face.   With the shrieking she was doing as she hit the bag, they were right to be worried.

***

to part 3

Xander drove up to the gate, looking at the keypad.   The swipe card didn't work when he tried it.   "Loose wire probably."   The keypad did and the gate opened.   He carefully drove the truck through the gate, minding the map Caleb had given him.   He didn't want to drive over the old mines on the lawn.   He pulled around to the side storage area, getting out to unpack the truck.   After he made himself some coffee and called Bobby's place.   "Hey, it's me."   He looked at his GPS readout on his watch and read it to him.   "I'm there.   We evacuated Sunnydale," he admitted.   He listened.   "I'm moving my stuff in here.   Caleb found it for me.   Traded me for some stuff for it.   Because it's too dangerous to have Izzy there, Bobby.   Please.   If you want to bring her instead of having me pick her up sure.  Thanks, I'll be here.   It'll take me a few hours to move her nursery and our stuff upstairs.   Yeah, it's a compound," he said with a grin.   "The keypad works but the slide card thing doesn't.   I'll be here; buzz when you get here."   He hung up and went back to moving and hiding his weapons.   Then he could do the nursery and stuff.   He could take the truck back tomorrow.

***

John's truck and Bobby's car pulled up to the reinforced wooden gateway.   John put in the passcode Caleb had given him but it didn't work so he buzzed the gate.   No answer.   He did it again.   A few minutes later a breathless voice hit the speaker.   "What's up?" Xander asked.

"We're here," John said.   "Keypad's broken."

"Crap."   The gate opened and they drove in.   Then it closed behind them.   Xander met them at the door so he could grab his daughter to hug.   "I missed you.   Were you good for Grandpa and Uncle Bobby?"   He sat down on the front stairs to hold her.   Even though she protested.   "I'm sorry I had to leave you with them."

John gave them fond looks but Bobby got out shaking his head.   "Ease up on the pressure, she's still smooshable, boy."

"Sorry."   He looked at his girl, getting a grin back.   "You didn't forget me.   Daddy's so happy."   He kissed her on the head.   "From your Auntie Faith."

"What happened?" Bobby asked.

Xander gave her another hug.   "Inside.   I thought I saw a listening device on a tree earlier."

"Caleb said the last owner was picked up by the FBI," John agreed.   They went inside and Xander settled into his usual recliner to hold his girl.   "She was good.   She cooed and charmed some customers for Bobby.   She was good for us and the last of the messy diapers from the flu was quickly gotten over with."

"That's so cool.   Now if only your uncle and daddy hadn't run away after giving you the flu."   She cooed and stroked his cheek.   "I know, I need a shave."   She grinned because he was.   "I missed you."   He kissed her on the nose then looked at them.   "Basically, the cult decided to take over the town and tear down the unholiness to make way for her magnificence while the new mayor took advantage of that to ambush Buffy so she could be turned."   John shuddered.   "She's still complaining that one of the girls who was all stake happy should be an eternal slayer, not her since she didn't want it."

"How?" Bobby asked.

"The new mayor had her tranqed and tied up then dropped her into a nest."   They groaned.   "She didn't even realize when she woke up.   I had to tell her.   Then I had to call Wes to warn him I had Spike bringing her to Angel and then I got to tell Faith before I left town."   He gave her a squeeze, getting a cuddle back.   She did love him.   "I had Willow sedate the town so we'd have enough time to change over to Riley's team.   There's no way they wouldn't come after us with her gone.   I heard them saying so at Willie's when we went to get a sit rep.   They're military and can pay for their former misdeeds by handling it until they can get Faith out of jail."   He swallowed.   "Buffy nearly lunged at Dawn when they got to Angel's."

John nodded.   "It was the most reasonable solution.   So why here?"

"I needed somewhere safe for Izzy.   With the ones who want her because of Sam, the ones who now want to make me ache, and the last few kooks of her cult, I wanted somewhere safe."   He grinned slightly.   "I used that two days to do a bit of ...cleaning around Sunnydale.   Caleb said a few things were too evil for him but he took them to hand over subtly.   Apparently he knows someone in the government who knows about hunting."

"There's an ATF agent who does," Bobby agreed.   "He hates that he knows but somehow he wandered into it once."

"So it'll go to someone who knows and knows how and why it was found," Xander decided.  "The rest is hidden but we have to be careful of the mines on the lawn until I can check them out.   We have a map."

John pulled out his phone and texted that to his boys.   "For when they show up."   He grinned.   "You'll have to do that before she's walking."

"I know.   There's none near the front of the house so it'll be safe until I can get to it."   They nodded at that.   "Plus, the property taxes are really cheap here.  So this is my first owned home."

John nodded.   "They would be."   He looked at Bobby.   Then back at the boy.   "Her room?"

"Could use painted after I strip the paneling.   The last guy *really* liked faux wood paneling.   But it'll give me something to do for a while."

"There's going to be snow soon," Bobby offered.   "You'll need a better car."

"It happens.   I got him to give me some extra on a few other things."   He grinned sweetly.   "Apparently a few of the ones in Florida needed it for some sea monster."

John shuddered.   "Heard about that.   It is nasty."

"Hey, it's not my former swim team," Xander said dryly.   They stared at him.   He grinned and went to show his daughter her room.   "Don't you worry, we'll make sure you don't turn into a fishy monster and then we'll make sure your room looks more girly, princess."   She blinked at him then stole her bear with a grin.   "Yeah, that's your Tara bear.   She'll see you soon.   She'll find some way to sneak in and cuddle you again."   He kissed her on the head, putting her into her crib.   She pouted.   "Don't want a nap?"   She made begging noises, holding up a hand.   "Okay, but you can't get down until after I clean the rug.   It's nasty."   He took her back out there.   "She found her Tara-given bear."

"That's a good gift for her," John agreed.   "Carpet could use cleaned."

"I know.   I only got here yesterday."   He sat her on the couch, settling beside her.   "Better?"   She gummed her bear's paw but cuddled him.   "Okay, we'll keep cuddling."

"Take a nap," Bobby said.   "Anything left to unpack?"

"Food.   I got her a lot of food since she can eat now."    He laid down with her on his stomach, letting her cuddle her bear and him again.   It made her grin and be a happy baby.   He loved her being happy and he was exhausted.   He had spent the last few days running on adrenaline.

They went to nose around.   The food did get unpacked and sorted.   The bedrooms got looked at.   There were spares there for the boys and at least one other person.   The basement was concrete but had carpet down so it could be finished easily enough.   The storage areas were on the side of the house.   The closest had weapons.   The farther one had bigger weapons.   "Clearly Caleb didn't take all of them," Bobby said dryly, opening a case to look.   "Full of stakes."

John opened the next one and hissed, shutting and locking it again.   "Not that one."   Bobby groaned.   "I wonder if they need more for that sea monster."

Bobby smirked.   "He won't get into trouble.   He can say it's the last guy's stuff.   Like the mines are."

John snorted.   "There's no agents that nice these days, Bobby.  That's why they got Kyle."

"Some do know."

"Yay."   They went to look around the porch.   They could spot a few starts to safe paths but otherwise they weren't going to try the lawn without the map.   Bobby found it in Xander's car and went to look.    The agents had gotten in last time by blowing a safe path for themselves.   That was more easily found.   "Think he'll remine it?" John asked.

"Boy's paranoid for a good reason," Bobby pointed out.

"True.   How long do you think my sons will take?"

"They're in Ohio."

"I made it from Missouri in about a day to your place."

"Dean drives faster," Bobby agreed.   "Think Angel's going nuts with her newly turned and there to be trained?"

"Possibly.   Especially if Spike stayed."   That got a smirk back.   "He always seemed to like to annoy others on the show," he said with a small shrug.   "I remember seeing a swim team episode."

"Mermaid taint."

"Oh."

"Black Lagoon monsters."

"Eww."   John paused.   "That means he's got some."   Bobby nodded, smirking some. "Huh."   He went to glance in at them then got them some coffee so they could sit outside and see what other plans Xander had made.   He might be there all the way until spring.   Maybe even next fall depending on how long it took to get Faith out of prison.   So he could plant a garden or flowers for the baby to admire.   John finally called Caleb.   "Thanks for giving him a paranoid place to live, Caleb."   He smiled.   "Taking a nap on the couch with the baby.   She's very happy to have the daddy back."   He laughed.   "Yeah, it's fine so far.   Sorted, mostly hidden and put up.   Why?   Did someone need something?   We found a whole case full of stakes."

Caleb laughed and said he had too.   "Any news out that way?"   He nodded as he listened, making notes.   "Any idea where the witches are?"   He laughed.   "That'll work.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "Tara's heading this way looking very purposeful.   Willow's back in Devon being helped some more on orders of Giles.   Who's still in LA being driven nuts by Buffy, who isn't sure if she likes being leather girl or not according to him.   Angel's walked off and had to be pulled away from a bright, sunny window once.   Spike saved him."   Bobby snickered at that. "Spike's headed back east, possibly to London, for a bit.   Until they fall back to handle Sunnydale again."

"Any news on Faith?"

"Not yet.   The sea monster's gone.   The locals were not happy with the mess they made of it either.   All over one of their tourist beaches."   Bobby shuddered.   "But they got out of view fast enough."   He looked inside then called Dean's phone with the GPS coordinates.   Then he hung up on his son asking what was there.   "There, that'll get Sammy back here to be a daddy soon."

"It's ripping him up, John," he said gently.

"I understand why the boy did it, but I don't like it.  Winchesters don't have baby's momma's."

"Not him, Xander.   Xander's the same sort of noble.   Hell, if he had one with a girl and she dumped him, he's the sort to take the baby and walk off from her."

"I realize that.   I also know it's better for her to have both parents, even if I don't think they'll get together."

"Probably not but Sammy wants to find a pastor and a ring anyway."

"That's how I taught my boys."

"The kid's the same sort of guy, John."

"I know it's better for her this way.   Still sucks."

"At least he's not blocking them or you from seeing her.   He should because it'd make her even safer."

"I know."   He looked inside then at him again.   "He's still a smartass."

"No one ever said you'd like all your daughter-in-laws," Bobby taunted.

"True.   I can only imagine the bimbos Dean could be bringing home."   He sipped his coffee, watching as a squirrel set off one of the mines.   "Really old."

"Very.   He'll need to demine the yard to make sure they're destroyed."

"Then he'd have to plant a lot of grass," Xander said from behind them.   "What was that?"

"Squirrel if you wanted it to cook," John said with a point.

"Eww."   He shuddered.   "I've heard of people eating bunnies but that's just sick, John."   He went back inside to his nap with his daughter.   The gun got put onto the table with the safety on.   Just in case it wasn't a squirrel next time.

John gave him ten minutes and looked inside, going to steal the gun.   He checked it over.   It was clean, loaded, and had the safety on.   He put it next to the stove before going back outside.   "He's still too paranoid."

"He has a reason.   The cult to his daughter tried to take over a town."

"They nearly did it.   It's a mess from what I heard."

"The news said it wasn't pretty.   Thankfully those FBI guys were stepping in too.  After they got out, they went hunting really fast to protect others."

"I don't like the Initiative being back."

"They're not.   Just the hunters who're left.   We can check on 'em now and then."   John nodded, putting his feet up on the bench.   "How long do you think?"

"Dean was driving and had the radio on.   Depends on which way they were heading."

"True.   And if it was an emergency or if their current hunt was solved."   That got another nod.   "You think they'll be back for the mines?"

"Yup.   I think he'll have to have someone demine it if he doesn't want to ruin the land by setting them all off."   They looked at each other and John sighed, calling the hunting ATF agent he knew.   They'd come out to bother the boy and get the mines.   They'd make sure they didn't arrest the boy for anything else.

***

Xander came out to the gate, looking at the agents out there once he had climbed the fence.  "Yes, gentlemen, can I help you?"

"Sir, do you own this place?" the lead agent asked calmly.

Xander nodded.   "I just bought it.   Which agency are you with since I heard the last owner got the FBI down on him?"

"ATF."

"Can you guys handle the mines he left on the lawn?   I don't want to ruin the grounds by setting them all off."

"We can," he agreed.   "If we have a map?"

"Yeah, I have one and a seven month old daughter."

"Then it's a very good idea.   May we enter, sir?"

Xander considered it.   "Why else are you here?"

"Word got back to us from a hunter," the other one said, stepping forward.   His mustache was really bushy and he looked relaxed.   "We want to know what else you found."

"A lot but I'm still a hunter."

"Hunter?" the lead agent asked.

"I'm from Sunnydale, guys.   I hunted the bad things out there."   The one who said that grimaced.   "I hunted with Buffy."

"Then you're Harris," he said.   Xander nodded.   "That makes more sense.   Found?"

"Mostly.   A few things were our apocalypse vault.   With the town going to hell I couldn't leave it there."

"Good.   Can we see them?" the lead agent asked.

"No."   He grinned.   "Those are hidden elsewhere."   He kicked open the gate, letting it swing open while he got down.   "Walk, gentlemen.   Your truck is too heavy to not set off the side mines."   They followed him up to the house.   "ATF," he shouted as he walked in.

"Thanks for the warning," John called back.   "You woke her up."

Xander went in to take her, walking back out with her.   "My daughter Izzy."

The agent who knew about hunters stared.   "She had that cult."

"Yes and the nice FBI agents handled them before I had to," he said simply.   That got a nod.   Xander pointed at the map on the wall.   "The safe paths.   One got detonated by a squirrel the other day.   They're really old and I wasn't sure how to disarm them without using a remote controlled car or something."   He looked at his daughter.   "Some day you'll learn to love the explosions like Daddy does."

"Hopefully not," John said, coming out to take her back.   "Hey, Buck."

"John."

Xander looked at John.   "Gee, thanks," he said dryly.

"Just about the mines."

"We heard someone had cleared out the multiple apocalypse vaults out there," Buck admitted, looking at the boy.

"Like I wanted to leave it in their hands," he defended.   "Besides, Caleb already turned that in.   I let him handle it."

"What else do you have, kid?"

"Stakes.   A few guns.   I might try deer hunting this year, not real sure yet."   He frowned, then went to check something.   He came back out with a book.   "Nothing too big.   No more explosives.   We used all those.   We have another thermo-phosphoric grenade somewhere."   They stared, mouths slightly open.   "Heat and light to take out nests.   I dealt in vampires."   The agents moaned at that.   He shrugged.   "It's like that in Sunnydale."

"I can understand that," Buck agreed quietly.   He looked around.   "This place...."

"Is being redecorated.   Though it's nice, they put all the dead animal heads in the basement."   John gave him an odd look.   "I put them in the shed.   Because eww.   I don't keep the heads of the cows I eat as burgers and steaks."   He took his daughter back.   "If you guys want those mines, just don't tear up the trees and too much of the ground, okay?"

"If we can," he agreed.   "We have a new mine removing tool."

"Cool with me."   He shrugged.   "I was going to have to remove them anyway when she started to walk."

"Good point," the lead agent agreed, staring at him.

Xander stared back, then snickered, walking off shaking his head.   "I've seen worse scowls on Clem when Dawn wouldn't give him his kitten back for his newest kitten poker game."

The lead agent pointed.   "Is he sane?"

"Mostly," John admitted.   "He had nightly hunting instead of case-by-case hunting we had.   That or the pregnancy did it to him.   Mary was a bit insane after having Dean."

"Not funny," Xander called.   "And it'll never happen again."

John looked back that way.   "It'd better not."   He shook his head quickly.   "Anyway, guys, what do you need to remove the mines?"

"Not a lot.   We've got the mine robot in the truck."   They took the map.   "Can we see what else he has?"

"Not everything's in the right box or case.   I found a case of stakes."   They groaned.   "He's well settled for an apocalypse, which he handled with his team.   He won't be using it on normals.   Plus Caleb can use him to supply some of us like the guys who needed it in Florida."

"What was that mess on the beach?" Buck asked.   Xander came out with a book, handing it over before going into the kitchen to make her a bottle of juice.   Then he walked off again.   Buck shook his head but looked at the picture.   "That's...disgusting I guess."

"Especially afterward," John agreed dryly.   "We're keeping track.   Especially my son Dean.   He's a weapons nut too.   He nearly bowed to the kid."

"Why are you and your sons involved?" Buck asked.   "You've kept strings from them for years."   The baby let out a squeal.   "Really?" he asked dryly when John flinched and tried to reach for his gun.

"When Rosenburg made the wish to accidentally merge our realms, she was muttering about Sammy," he said quietly.   "That's why the little lynch pin in there was created and carried by Xander."   That got a nod from both agents.   "With the demon that wanted Sammy, the cult to her because he carried her, and his past, he's a bit paranoid.   That's why Caleb gave him this place."

"I can understand that," the lead agent said.   "Does he ever not act like that?"

"I've seen him in a fight.   He's scarily self-trained," John told him.   That got a groan.   "But he knows what he's doing well enough that I don't worry about him."

"Good to know," he decided.   "Let us work on those mines."   That got a nod and they went out to get the robot and start extracting those things so they could be disarmed.   The lead agent came in and found the right light switch, turning off their lines.   Then he went back out.   "Forgot about the switch."

"Probably makes for a good plan," Buck decided.   The robot was working pretty well over the grass.   For now.   It was a tester model so they'd see how well it ran after a hundred mines.   Because there was probably a thousand out there.

***

Xander settled in on the front porch two days later with Izzy while the ATF agents cleared a few more feet out there.   "Maybe some day you'll take what we're going to teach you and go to do their job, princess.   They'd probably like that since your Uncle Dean and I will be teaching you guns before you hit puberty."

Buck looked up at him with a small grin.   "You'll need all those shotguns and semi-automatics we saw to protect her from the boys, Harris."

"Hopefully she won't be that easy.   Finding many she likes but not easy."   He grinned.   "Think she could go do your job some day?"

"I think if you ever calmed down you could," he offered.   His boss gave him the oddest look.   "They'd know more about guns and some networks than we do."

"Yeah, but I doubt the kid could ever calm down that much."

"He's not much worse than JD," he said dryly.

"Not possible."

Xander snickered.   "I can and have calmed down before but usually I'm in the thinking time before an apocalypse that I'm helping plan the defeat of."

Chris turned to stare at him.   "You throw that word around awfully easy."

Xander nodded.   "Were we a show to you guys?"   Buck nodded.   "Figures.   Yes, all that stuff that they showed, happened.   Up to Glory.   We merged right before we took down Glory with the Winchesters help.   They told us about Joyce's tumor, her, Willow going bad, all that."   Buck shuddered.   "Then we told them what we saw because to us the Winchesters were a show.   It helped with the demon after Sam and all that stuff."   He looked at his daughter then at them.   "I don't know what you'd call fighting something that could destroy the world, but in Sunnydale we called that an apocalypse.   We had at least a major one every year and then a more minor two or three the rest of the year.   Including the hellmouth opening and all that stuff.   It would've only taken a day for anything coming out of it to get past our borders and come for the rest of you guys."

Buck nodded.   "I can see how that happens.   What about now?"

"Finn's guys have it."   Buck looked confused.   "Initiative strike teams that got sent to the UN for hunting squads.   Until they can get Faith out of jail or Buffy back to slaying since she was turned."

"How?" Buck asked.   "I know that didn't happen on the show."

Xander nodded.   "During the cult taking over, the mayor's people decided to take advantage of it and take out some of the problems we gave them by darting her, tying her up, and dropping her into a huge nest."   Buck shuddered.   "I had her sent to Angel and Willow souled her the next morning."   He bounced Izzy on his knee a few times, making her squeal happily.   He smiled at her.   "You'll get to see Auntie Buffy soon, princess."   He looked at Chris again.   "What do you call something like our graduation?   Or the Initiative creating something that would've tried a world-takeover bid?"

"I'd call those apocalypses," he admitted.   "Are you retired?"

"We're in hiding until it's safe to go back to help Faith."

"You don't have to," Buck pointed out.   "It'd be safer if you didn't.   Especially for her."

"I'm a hellmouth baby, Buck.   I know that town better than even the demons who've lived there for years.   Once they make it safe again, we'll be needed to back Faith up.   It's not a glamorous job but someone has to do it.   That's usually my job description.   Your little robot is going to hit the tree."   They stopped it.   He smiled a bit.   "It happens that I need to be there.   She'll be safe.   We'll make sure of it.   Faith doesn't want her hurt either.   I'll probably be the last to go back because of Izzy but I'll be needed some day.   Faith doesn't have a tactical thinker on the team unless she keeps some of the Initiative guys.   And she hates them."

"Because they screwed up?" Buck asked.   Xander nodded.   "How did she hear?"

"We told her.   Some of the old mayor's people told her too.   Wes gave her the reports of what happened during that last battle.   She heard all about that last year in Sunnydale from him and me when she asked."

"They really pushed you aside?"   Xander nodded, cuddling his patting daughter.   He nibbled on her fingers when she patted his lips, making her giggle so he grinned at her.   "You're doing a good job with her."

"If she wants to hunt, she's got to be eighteen and trained more than I am now," Xander told them.   "We'd all love for her to do something normal.   Be absolutely mundane."   He shrugged.   "We'll see what happens."

"You didn't have to stay," Buck pointed out.

Xander nodded. "Yeah I did.   Even when they didn't admit it, they needed me because I was the only one backing her up most of the time.   Willow didn't really hunt.   She staked a few times when she had to.   Faith did when she got there.   Giles didn't hunt with her.   Angel did now and then but I'm sure you saw the problems there.   There were days I felt like Cassandra shouting warnings that no one paid any attention to and didn't remember hearing when things went as predicted.   Then again, it was high school.   It was a drama sink."

"You could've died," Chris pointed out.

Xander nodded.   "I could've died at home, guys.   Since we know the dead like me, what would've happened if I hadn't helped?   If they had come for me because for whatever reason the spirits of the dead like me?   I had a big target once they realized I knew.   A second one for having people around me who didn't pay attention to me.   If I had been turned and disappeared for ten or twelve days, my parents might not have noticed.   Plus those with any gifts get hunted more often so I'd have a third huge target once they realized these things about me.   I knew a few who said they had waited for me to finish gaining my full height to come after me.   Guys like me are useful as more than minions.   Since I know what I'd be like, I can't let that happen.   I had to act to stay out of more danger.   Even if the hunting could've gotten me killed.   Buffy would've stayed dead.   Kendra still would've died.   Faith would probably be dead by now too.   Having Buffy there took a lot of slayer pressure off her.   She didn't hunt nearly as often as Buffy did in the early days."

Buck nodded.   "I can understand that.   You still have the chance to fall back to a secondary position to protect her, kid.   Isn't she more important?"

"What makes you think they still won't come for her?   She still has demons who want her because of both of her fathers.   After you guys are done, I might be remining around the fence area.   Because there's still demons who remember me, want me for what I did, want Sam for what his family does, and her cult still has some random members here and there.   One tried to get her when she had the flu right before Sunnydale fell in."

"Being proactive would help keep her safe, but it's a sucky choice," Chris agreed.

"I know, but it's the only good one I have.   Short of running away and changing our names.   Then they'd still find us.   Even if we ran to Mexico or lower Central America.   As Riley's guys found out, there's plenty of higher demons down there and not a whole lot of fighting against them."

"Think there's any good, safe place?"

"Somewhere she's surrounded by people who love her and know what could happen," Xander told them.   "We already know something from my past will come back to try for her at least once.   The demons who wanted Sam want her now."

"Why?" Buck asked.

"Small prophecy about the demon that wanted him building a demon army.   That's why he kidnaped something like eleven kids to make a chosen one.   Then they'd lead his army.   Since he wanted Sam for that, they want her to finish it and be his heir.   I had the worst time during my pregnancy with demons coming up to bow to my stomach."

Buck hid his smile.   "I can see how that'd get annoying."

"I didn't need a paternity test, it told me all I needed to know," Xander said dryly, cracking them up.   "It was easy targets for mood swings though."   They cracked, laughing at that.   "How much longer on the mines?"

"Few more days for this batch," Chris said.

"Okay."   He looked at her.   "Want to stay out here?   It's getting a bit chilly.   We'll need to buy you a sweater soon."

She looked at him.   "Meme!"

He stared at her.   "Was that like mama?   Was that talking or more baby babble, Izzy?"   He stared at her.   "Say it again?   Or Dada?   Can you try Dada?"

"Mememememememememememe!" she shouted, beaming at him.

"I'm so proud," he squealed, giving her a big cuddle.   "John, Bobby!"   They came rushing out with guns.   "Tell them, Izzy.   Say it again?"

"Memememe!" she said, beaming at them.

"That's your first word?" John asked.

"Apparently it's her version of mama," Xander said with a shrug.

"Congrats, pumpkin," Bobby said, grinning at her.   "Your daddy's first word was Dede so don't you worry."

John gave him a dirty look.   "That's because I spent the week before yelling at Dean," he said dryly.   He picked her up to hold.   "I'm very proud, Izzy.   That was very good."   She leaned forward to suck on his cheek.

"That's right, Grandpa needs sugar," Xander agreed happily.   He found his phone, getting into the recording feature.   "Say it again for Daddy, Izzy?   Please?"

She looked at the phone, reaching for it to play with or nibble on.   "Me?" she asked, staring at it.   She beat it on her grandfather's chest.   "Memememe!"   She beat it some more until he plucked it from her fingers and turned it off, handing it to the kid.   "Meme!" she shouted.

"You can have it back later," he promised with a smile.   "Want some nummies as a treat?"   She cooed so he took her inside to get her some applesauce.

"Congrats," Bobby said.   "That's very adorable."

"Well, we do call her a princess so of course it's about her," he said with a grin, getting a laugh back.   Bobby went to help her eat.   Xander went to email that audio file to Sam and Dean's email account.   Then he went back to watching the Feds try not to be too nosy.

***

Sam's phone beeped with a new email message.   He pulled it out of his pocket to upload his email, getting into it.   The file was played and Dean laughed.   "That's our princess," Dean agreed.   "All about her."

Sam nodded.   "She doesn't really have anyone to call mama so I'm guessing that's as close as she'll come for a while."

"It's good that he shared that."

"It was."   He reran it, smiling at how brilliant his daughter is.   "How long before we get there?"

"He's got Kyle's old compound.   We'll be there late tonight if we don't make more than a few short stops for gas."

"We can do that."   Dean nodded, speeding up a little bit.   "His email said that the ATF guys are still demining the grounds."

"That's a good warning.   He say which branch?"

"He said Dad called a contact named Buck."

"I haven't seen him in ages."

"We know him?"

"About five, six years ago, he ended up on a case that had a poltergeist trying to take out an arms dealer.   That was before he was ATF.   Him and his former partner were not amused but Dad and I got the poltergeist while they got the arms dealer."

"Good to know.   So he knows?"

"A lot.   He's the guy that Caleb turns in anything too huge to.   Some of Xander's stash probably went to him."

"Very good to know.   Which branch is he out of?"

"Last we heard, Denver."

"Not too far away from Kyle's then."   That got a nod.   "Think they're harassing Xander about his stash?"

"Hopefully not.   He's pitiful when he pouts and who knows what he'd find the next time."

"Yeah, that's a scary thought," Sam decided, shifting to get more comfortable.   "I still can't believe she's old enough to talk."

"Dude, you were the same age once.   I remember changing your diapers."

"Think Xander's pissed that we gave her the flu?"

"Yeah.   I got a voicemail of him swearing at me with her crying in the background.   Twice."

"Ow.   He's going to beat us."

"It was necessary.   There was a Fed looking for us there."

"I know."   They sighed.   "Willow?"

"Talked to her.   She removed the newer stuff."

"Good.   She's a handy one to know."

"Think Tara's there yet?"

"Probably on her way.   She didn't want to give up the baby at all the last time we talked."

"She's a fussy aunt," Dean agreed.   "Fussier than any we had."

"We would've been spoiled by having one like her," Sam pointed out.

"True.   Dad would've stopped her if it was us.   Since Izzy's a girl I guess he doesn't think she'll want to hunt."

"Maybe."   Personally, he thought if their father had given Xander orders to raise Izzy like they were, Xander would've laughed his butt off and tossed him out of the house --probably on his butt.   Though Xander did want her to make her own decision about hunting but they'd let them train her.   "When are we going to start working on her self-defense training?"

Dean shrugged.   "Older than you were?"

"Do you think maybe around school age she should learn how to defeat bullies?   She'll have plenty with having two dads unless she's living in a gay town."

Dean glanced at him.   "You want me to plan that?"

"You're better at physical brawling than I am," Sam admitted quietly.   "I don't want Dad to boot camp her like we were.   Can you work with Xander on that?"

Dean smiled.   That was a great compliment from his little brother.   "Sure.   I can work on him with that and any gun training she'll get."   Sam beamed but relaxed.   "Without being such a hardass like Dad was."   Sam nodded.   Dean tapped the steering wheel along with the music he had playing.   He checked the gas gauge.   "Pit stop coming up."

"I could use a bathroom break," Sam admitted.   "Whichever is done first gets lunch?"

"Deal."   Dean found a good gas pit stop and pulled in.   Sam went to the bathroom.   Dean pumped gas.   Then they went to scrounge lunch from the packette attached to the gas station.    A few microwavable sandwiches, a bag of chips, three sodas, one juice, and they were back on the road.

***

Dean parked behind Bobby's car, looking around.   "They've done a good job on the mine removal."   Sam groaned, pointing at the open storage areas.   Dean groaned too.   They went to find the spikes that the original owner had used.   They pulled the doors down and inserted the spikes into the special holders.   That electrified the doorways so no one could open it from the outside.   They finished up and moved to the main doors.   The security system was off so Dean flipped it back on and they went inside to check out the house.   Xander had done some work.   He had painted some of the darker wood paneling Kyle had put in.   There were no more animal heads hanging in the living room like there had been when he had watched them the last time.   Sam found the nursery and cooed, smiling at his sleeping little girl.   Dean came in to look over his arm, grinning too.   They turned when they heard a footstep.   "We closed the storage areas and set the spikes," Dean told Bobby quietly.

"Sure."   He looked at the girl then at them.   "The rollaway's in the closet.   Xander's got one in his room too.   Don't know why Kyle had a trundle bed."

"He had his wife sleep there until she left him," Sam said quietly.   "He had nightmares that made him thrash her a few times."

"That makes more sense I guess.   Sleep, boys."   He went back to his own bed.

Dean looked at Sam, who shrugged and pointed at the closet.   Dean nodded, going to check the couch.   It was lumpy, bad for his back, and had springs sticking out - like the last time he had slept on it.   So he went to find the trundle bed in Xander's room.   He had slept there when he was younger.   It wasn't a bad bed.   He stripped down to his boxers and tank top undershirt before climbing in.   His knife went under the pillow.   Then he laid down to listen to Xander snore.   Dean snickered.   Every few snores Xander would purr.   That was so sickeningly cute.

***

Xander woke up and snuffled.   He was on something softer than a pillow that was moving.   He grunted inquisitively.   Then he scratched his chin on it.

"You pulled me up," Dean said patiently.   "Then pinned me like some war prize that was going to escape."

"Not in that life anymore," Xander mumbled.   "No more riding in to capture brides for the tribe."   He yawned and got up to wander to the bathroom.

"Xander, maybe you should put on more clothes?" Bobby said loudly.   "Before your daughter starts to appreciate naked men?"

"Bite me," Xander said.

"It'd be pretty easy to do with the way you're naked," Bobby complained.

Dean chuckled, getting up to search for the downstairs bathroom.   He came up to pull on clothes.   John gave him an odd look.   "Trundle bed but Xander decided to relive a past life or whatever and capture me for the tribe."

John walked off shaking his head.   "Too early for this."   He went to make some coffee.   He heard the squeal and looked down the hall.   "I take it Sammy's in there?"

"Yup."   He went to check.   "Sammy!" he shouted.   Sam woke up with a gasp.   "Your daughter squealed for your attention."

Sam beamed at his staring daughter.   "Good morning, Izzy!"   He pulled her out and to his cot to cuddle her.   She snuggled in.   "I missed you too, baby.   I heard you talked.   Can you talk for me?"

"Mememe!" she said, looking at Dean.   "Meme?"

Dean came in to kiss her on the head.   "You're a good girl, Izzy."   She smiled since he was and snuggled in again.   "Sure, you cuddle the Sammy daddy."   He went to get his own coffee.   Xander was in there gulping some while Bobby waited to give him more.   "Morning, Xander."

Xander frowned at him.   "You're here?"

"We got in late last night.   Don't remember pulling me up to pin me?"

Xander slowly shook his head.   "I didn't think I was doing a redo of going out to capture brides for the tribe."   He frowned and then it cleared up so he could get a drink.   "Izzy?"

"On Sammy's chest cooing at him."

"That's good."   He smiled.   "Did you see this place?"

"The old owner, Kyle, watched us a few times when we were younger.   That's why we put the shock system on the storage area doors for you and turned on the security system."

"Cool.   Shock system?"

"I'll show you after I shower and you wake up."   Xander smiled and nodded, drinking more of the coffee Bobby gave him.   Dean went to take his own shower then came out redressed to take the baby and get her cleaned up.   "C'mon, since we weren't there when you were so sick."

"She spent the night in the hospital," John told him.   Dean grimaced.   "She wouldn't quit crying, her fever spiked, and she started to puke.   Nearly on one of the cult members."

"Not our fault.   One of the nosier Feds was nearby checking up on us," Dean said quietly.

"I can understand that."   Dean took Izzy into the bathroom to give her a bath.   Sam came in once he had on clothes.   John shook his head when Sam kicked Dean out.   "He is experienced in how to do it, Sammy."

"We did good the last time."   Sam kicked the door shut and went back to helping her splash the running water.   She was happy so he was happy.   Even if he had to clean up her butt when she let one into the water.   The rerunning was fine with him.   She let him do everything but her hair.   She fussed at that.

"Tip her back, run the water over from front to back," Dean said, opening the door.   "She's probably got an ear ache."

"Thanks."   He did that.   It was hard to juggle her but Dean came in to hold her for him.   "Thanks," he said more quietly.

"Sometimes you've gotta adapt."   Dean let him do the shampoo, which she didn't like.   "I know, it's bubbles you can't chase.   You can have bubbles later."   She let them rinse it off then get her out to dry off and put into a new diaper.   She was extra wiggly this morning.   They brought her out and found the agents getting their own coffee.   "Morning, Buck.   New boyfriend?" Dean taunted with a smirk for Chris.

"Don't make me arrest you, Winchester."   Xander smacked him on the arm with a growl.   Chris glared at him.   Xander just smirked.   "Don't do it again, Harris."

"Or what?   You'll scowl more fiercely?   Can you do that?   Because still not as bad as a few of the girls I know.   You should've seen Cordy with PMS.   Especially the first year when she had zits too."   Chris walked off shaking his head.   "Willow took them anyway," he told Dean.   "That way you don't have to run again the next time you give her the flu."   He punched him on the arm.   "Bastard."

"Hit me when I don't have her in my arms," Dean complained, rubbing the spot.   She cooed at him so he grinned at her.   "I know, I was mean.   I'm sorry you got our flu, Izzy."

"I had to sit her on the toilet for a few hours because we ran out of diapers."

"That bad?" Sam asked.

"Forty-eight within a day."

Sam shuddered.   "Very sorry, Xander.   We didn't have much of a choice."

"I realize that now.   If you ever do it again you're going to get to give her the sex talk and talk to her about periods."

"Eww," Dean said with a shudder.   He looked at her.   "Maybe you won't have those girl problems."

"Fat chance," Buck said with a grin as he came back for more coffee.   "He'll need all those guns he has to drive off the boys."

"We put on the shock system," Sam told him with a grin.   "The original owner made them."

"We heard," Buck said dryly, going back outside.   Chris was already shaking his hand to get the feeling back in it.   "The more times you touch it, the worse it hurts."

"Wonderful."   He glared at the door.   "Someone thought we were too nosy."

"Sam and Dean did it.   They knew the original owner."   He handed over the extra cup of coffee.   "How much longer do you think we have?"

"Probably a few more days.   At least someone's at the ranch feeding everything."   He went back to dealing with the mine freeing robot.   Buck went to snoop around because he was a bit better at it.

Dean came out a few hours later.   "I always liked the grounds here.   Even if Kyle wouldn't let me dive into his backup well to see what he had stored down there."

"Is that why we have so much iron in the water?" Xander asked as he and Izzy joined him to sit in the old lounge chairs.

"No, the water was already irony before he started to hide wrapped stuff down in the well."   He got comfortable.   "He had the stuff wrapped so it's all waterproof but it's been years so I don't know if anything's still safely wrapped."

Buck's head came up.   "Well?"

"Yeah, there's the main water well and then there's a deep hole well that's somehow a cavern or something.   He used to put stuff down it after wrapping it in water-tightplastic."   He sipped his coffee.   "Also, did they ever break into his underground vault?"   Xander gave him an amused look.   "Sammy and Dad think it'll probably be really old and need to be given away for safety reasons," he said.

"That makes sense," Xander agreed.   "We can check.   I can dive somewhat."

"We have an underwater camera in the truck," Chris admitted.   "Where's this well, Dean?"

"Out back."   They followed him through the house to where the well cover should be.   "I need a shovel.   And it looks like an axe for the tree."

"We found a really crummy chainsaw," Xander admitted.   "And an axe we need to sharpen."

Dean gave him an odd look.   "Those are just covers, Xander."   He led him to the garage, opening the compartment behind the crummy tools.   "Kyle said he did that so no one would break in and steal it from him."   He checked the chainsaw.   "We need gas."   Buck went to get him some, bringing a can back a few minutes later, and a shovel since it didn't look like they had one.   Dean took the shovel to find the opening, freeing the top.   Then the tree had to go.   He checked it over, then what was around, picking a direction for it to fall.   It took a good half an hour but it finally fell.   Sam came out to get the baby since she was yelling back at the loud noise.   Xander took the axe to get the roots that were still in the way.   Dean pulled up the cover and they looked at the dark, deep looking water underneath the wooden cover.   "I know at least one artillery case is wrapped up down there."

Chris knelt to look then turned on the camera before dropping it into the water.   Buck had the monitor for it.   They stared.   "Yeah, you could say that, Dean."   He let him see it.

Xander pointed.   "That one's leaking water."   That got a nod.   "Should I go find my swimsuit?   I don't want that in the water.   Though I'm guessing that's why there's a radiation sensor on the water supply."

"No, Kyle was paranoid about that stuff."   That just got a nod.   "Want us to bring it up for you, Chris?   Some of that still looks good."

"Please, boys."   Xander went to get his swimsuit and came back to warm up then dove in.   "Isn't that cold, Xander?"

"Not like I have a girlfriend who'll complain," he quipped before taking a deep breath and diving down.   It didn't look that deep.   He grabbed the first few things to bring up, letting them grab them.   "I'm not sure I can touch the bottom, guys.   Not without an air tank."

"That we don't have," Buck admitted.

"Dad, do you have an air tank?" Dean called.

"No."   He came out to the back porch.   "Oh, that stash.   He planned on using some metal rods with magnetic tips to help him bring them up."   He went to find one and brought it out.   "Try that."   Xander took one and went down, sending it up a minute later before coming up with a few more cases.   "Won't work?"

"The stuff that sank is the heaviest and doesn't have a way to get it without poking it for water to get in."   He looked at Chris.   "I'm good but I'm not that big on the mermaid taint."

"We can rig up something later.   Bullets it looks like?"

Xander dove then came back up with one, tossing it at him.   "Cash.   Can I keep that?"

"Sure, kid," Buck decided.   Chris gave him an amused look.   "Not like we can prove where it came from and he found it in the home he bought.   If the former owner isn't around to argue with him it should be finders keepers on cash, Pard."

Chris considered it.   "He was clearly dealing weapons."

"Yeah, but the baby will need winter clothes soon.   It's either that or the kid has to sell something else of *his* collection."

"I take rewards," Xander quipped before diving down again.   This was cold water.   He brought up a case with a gasp of air.   "Heavy because it's water logged."   Dean dragged it over with the pole.   They opened the plastic to let the water out then opened the case to show the nice compact land-to-air missile system.   Xander looked from his spot on the edge of the opening.   "That's pretty but I doubt even a gun god could get it to work now."

"It probably was," Chris agreed.   "How many more, Harris?"

"Tons.   Literally."

"The best way is probably going to be pumping the water out," John said.   "Sending it into the forest so anything that was leaked into this one can filter off in the ground."   They all nodded.   "I have no idea where we'd get a pump that strong."

"I doubt a swimming pool one would be," Xander admitted.   He looked at the money.   "One of you guys check the money to make sure it's real?"   Chris knelt to open that package, nodding at it.   "Cool.   Grocery shopping!"   He climbed out, shivering a bit.   "Let me shower and change back into real clothes."   He hurried inside.   There was a breeze out here.

"Hell of a son-in-law you have," Buck teased John.

John nodded.   "Even if he does sing the baby silly, goofy songs that stick in your head until you bang it out of there," he complained.   Dean shot him a look.   "He did."

"Xander's a nice guy, Dad.   If I was gay, I'd take Xander in a heartbeat."

"If you're gay, at least you won't be giving me more grandkids from the fooling around you do, Dean."

"Hasn't happened so far."

John looked up.   "Thank you."   He glared at his son.   "You don't have to sleep with half the US's waitresses, Dean.   Really."   He walked off.

"Sure, Dad, let me find a wife," he called after him.   "Settle down and give you more grandkids."   John shuddered.   "Asshole."

Sam came out onto the back porch.   "If I were gay, Xander's shyness would have already been taken care of, guys, but I doubt Dean can marry the baby's daddy."   He glared at his father, who snickered.   "Keep it up, Dad.   Willow was wanting another niece."

"Better not be from me," Xander called from inside.   "And that would have to mean both of us were gay, Sam.   Since I've never even seen another naked guy, that might be a problem."

Sam glared inside, cracking Dean up.

"He does know that he and his dad do scowl just alike?" Buck asked Dean.

"Now and then, yeah.   They're both stubborn assholes."   He looked down in there.   "Where would we get a pump that big?"

"Let me see if any of the local offices have one," Chris said, going to call from the truck.   He came back with a smirk.   "Vin knows someone who has one.   He can borrow it and be up here later tonight."

"More to worship at the altar of cuteness that is my niece," Dean quipped.

"She is adorable."

"Everyone says that," Dean agreed.   "Maybe the succubus Xander slept with gave her that sort of taint since we couldn't find another one."

"I was adorable at that age too," Xander called from inside the house.   "My mom had me try out for a few commercials.   It's the female version of my drawing bad girls only she does nice guys instead."

"Then explain Cordy," Dean called back.

"Exposure to my own cuteness."

"You two did date," Dean agreed more quietly.

Xander leaned out.   "Still didn't sleep with her, Dean.   Not fully."   He withdrew.   "I'm making eggs."   His daughter let out an awesome squeal.   "Gee, sweetie, want some eggs?" he teased with a grin.   She beamed from Sammy's lap.   "Okay, I can make you some eggs."   He finished his breakfast and started on hers, handing it to Sam before sitting down.   Sam reached over to turn off the stove.   "Thanks."

"Welcome."   He let her scrunch her fingers in the scrambled eggs and suck them off.   "Want me to feed you?"   He picked up a fork but she refused to eat off it.   She kept turning her head out of the way.   "Okay, you can feed yourself today."   He put her hand back in the eggs, letting her suck them off again.   It clearly made her happier today.   "Any word on Faith?"

"I called Wesley last night and he said that they're still trying to get her down to probation or something like that."   He ate another bite.   "Her next parole hearing is in two weeks."

"Any chance of it?"

"Wes doesn't think so.   He said the Warden supports it but he's not on the panel.  If not, the next one is in about six months."

"That's going to suck.   What's going on in Sunnydale?"

"Riley's lost two guys so far.   Both vamped.   Spike was kicking himself for saving Riley's ass; he went to lurk in LA instead for a while.   Dru showed up to start a new vampire nation."   Sam moaned, shaking his head quickly.   "He's letting Angel handle her since he can't and doesn't want to stake her himself."   He ate another bite, hearing the begging noises.   He picked up some of hers to feed it to her but she didn't want that.   He ate that bite and fed her a bite of his, getting a smile back.   "Ah, you're having a fussy day.   No wonder."   He finished up his first egg with her help, moving onto his second.   She ate hers in between bites of his.   "Buffy said she'd be going back to Sunnydale in a few weeks.   She doesn't like Dru all that much and she thinks she can handle being back there for a bit.  We're not so sure and Angel's been nagging her about not overfeeding and how the hellmouth can taint."

"I guess that sort of energy could," Sam agreed.   "Will she be okay?"

"If he thinks she's tainted, he'll pull her out of there and send her to New York or something to hunt.   Travers has tried to have her taken out twice but he stopped one and she stopped the other one with Willow's help.   Then she told him about the soul restoration spell.   He's not happy."

"I'm not happy," Sam admitted.   "I think it's pretty unfair to her."

"She agreed to it.   It was that or stake her.   She decided to keep going on."   That got a nod. "Faith agreed not to stake her apparently.   Travers is pissed with our judicial system because he can't get Faith free or take her out to call the next slayer.   Whichever one would be easier."   Sam gave him an odd look.   Xander nodded, eating another bite.   She made begging noises so he cut off another piece for her.   "He's not real particular and he sees the girls as disposable weapons.   I treat my guns better than he does the slayers in line.  That's one of the reasons we don't like the Council.   They hate me because I butted into Buffy's scared duty of being alone."

"That sucks though.   You guys kept her alive for over five years."

"The longest lasting before her was eleven months I think," Xander agreed.   Sam gaped.   Xander nodded.   "She was kinda young too.   Not a lot of activity around her."

"It happens, but it sucks," Sam agreed.

Xander nodded.   "Which is why the Council hates my ass."

"They can blow me," Sam shot back.   "You did what was necessary.   Thank you."

"Welcome," he said with a small grin.   He looked at his staring daughter.   "Can I finish my own breakfast?"   She grinned at him.   He sighed and ate one last piece, feeding her the rest.   Then she finished her own eggs.   "Once you're in the living room, I'll make myself something more to eat since I'm still hungry for some reason," he said dryly.

Sam laughed.   "What still needs to be done around here?"

"Drywalling instead of the paneling.   Cleaning the carpets.   Finding Dean his own bed."

"There's a trundle under yours."

"I noticed that.   I apparently decided to relive my past life and captured him as a tribal bride."   Sam snickered.   "I don't think he wants to replay that one."

"Probably not, no."   He looked at her.   "Want to get a shampooing machine, sweetie?"

"If that cash isn't counterfeit then we can do that and get her some sweaters," Xander agreed, leaning on the table.   "Plus have them bring out some more drywall sheets."

"That's not a bad plan for the day," Bobby agreed, coming up from the basement.   "Thanks for turning on the shock systems, Sammy."

"I didn't want to get Xander in trouble."

Xander shrugged.   "I hid most of that stuff magically.   It already had a spell on it," he offered with a grin.   Sam snorted, giving him a look.   "It does."   He took his daughter back.   "Think your other daddy should get his daddy's truck so we can go hit the hardware store, princess?"   She cooed, patting his cheek with her eggy hand.   "Yeah, the place with the stuff I won't let you look at too closely.   Want to go back there?" he asked with a grin.   She continued to pet him.   "That's a good idea."

"Let me get the keys while you clean her up."   Xander took her to clean them both up.   Sam went outside.   "Dad, need the truck keys."

"Why?"

"Hardware store run if that money's all good.   Drywall and carpet shampooer."

John tossed them over.   "Make sure they'll handle shag and industrial carpet both, Sammy."

Sam nodded, going inside to grab his jacket.   It was a bit chilly today.   Dean brought in a few stacks of cash.   "Good?"

"Very good.   No counterfeit that I've found anywhere."   Sam nodded pocketing it.   "Get her something cute too."

"We can look while we do a bit of grocery shopping," Xander agreed, coming out with her under an arm.   He looked down at Dean's odd look at her.   "She likes to be carried like that."

"Is that good for her?"

"It might make her belch after eating half of my breakfast on me."   He walked her out to get the carseat from his car, taking it to the truck.   It went in the middle and he climbed in once she was hitched in.   Sam got in to drive.   And away they went.

***

John woke up when he heard his truck, checking his watch.   "Three hours to do some grocery shopping and the hardware store?"   He walked outside, getting handed his granddaughter.   Who for some reason was dressed up like a puppy, complete with ears.   "Halloween costume?"

"No.   Kiddy play and crawl suit."   Xander grinned.   "Dean wanted her to be cute."

"I doubt that's for daily wear," John said.

"It was in the normal kid clothes section," Sam said as he slid out to help with the groceries.   "Dean, come help!" he shouted.   Dean came out but paused when he saw his niece, giving them a funny look.   "It was in the normal clothes.   It's for babies to get down and play in."

"Uh-huh.   A puppy?"

"We got all three that they had in her size," Xander promised.   "She's got a kitty one and a pumpkin one.   The saleslady said they had one with a sparkly wand but I don't think we need her to be a fairy princess yet."   He carried bags past them.   "Help or don't eat, Dean."

"Sure, I can help."   He grabbed some of the stuff to carry in.   "She is terminally cute in that.   It's sapping my macho points by the ton looking at her."

Sam beamed.   "I knew she'd be adorable when I found them."

"That explains so much," Dean decided.   Xander walked past him snickering.   "Not like you haven't picked out a few cutesy outfits for her too.   Or don't you remember her baby lumberjack outfit?"

"Of course I do.   She looks adorable in a flannel shirt.   And it was more grunge than baby lumberjack."

John shook his head.   "C'mon, princess.   We'll make you more normal."   He put her on the couch.   She wiggled and got onto her stomach.   "Ready to crawl already?"   She wiggled her way onto the pillow, sucking her thumb with one of her ears.   "Sure, you cuddle in.   I'm sure it was a long day for you."   He went to get the rug shampooer.   Then the bottles for it.   "How do we do this?"   Xander found the instructions and receipt package, handing it over.   He checked it over and went to run hot water for it. Since she wanted to crawl, he wanted that ugly beige shag carpeting cleaner for her.   He looked at her and smiled.   "Mary would be cooing over you, princess."

Dean stopped to look at her then went to get the camera.   Before he disgusted himself by cooing a the cuteness.   He was her favorite uncle but he still had some limits he couldn't cross without making himself sick from the sugar.

Bobby came out of the basement, looking at her since the other two were.   He shivered.   "That's a fatal level of cuteness."   Dean took another picture for him.   "Thanks, Dean."

"Maybe it's so cute we can banish stuff with it since she's so adorably pure," he quipped.   His father swatted him.   "Hey!   That was a different show!"

"Shut up, Dean."

Sam walked in with a load of bags, stopping to coo.   "Awwww."

"There went all your macho points for the month," Dean told him.

Sam kicked him on the leg.   "Shut up, jerk."

"It did, bitch.   You need to grow more anyway.   You were critically low before she was born.   That's why you turn into a chick now and then."

Xander walked in with a sigh.   "She's a little girl.   Of course she's adorable, but there had better be a picture."

"Already got it," Dean promised, letting him see the digital image on the camera's screen.   Xander grinned and carried the rest of the bags into the kitchen.   Sam followed with his.   He looked at his father.   "Think Caleb wants a copy?"

"I think that's cute enough to make me mushy," he admitted.   Dean laughed, going to email a copy to their friends who knew about the baby.

Bobby answered his phone.   "Singer."   He listened then snickered.   "Yes, it's a puppy costume, Ellen.    She's still sucking her thumb with one of the ears.   Sammy said she got a few others too."   He burst out snickering again.   "Of course you can.   Kyle's old place.   Buck and his boss are up here to demine the yard for the boy."

Xander leaned out.   "Wait until you see the kitty one.   She looks a lot like Miss Kitty Fantastico."

"Who?" Dean asked.

"Tara's kitty."

"We'll make sure she gets pictures of her in it then," John decided.   Xander grinned, going back to putting things up.   "Someone help me with this thing," he ordered.   Bobby helped him set it up and then they worked on the carpet.   "Bobby, how long are you staying?"

"I'll probably head later on tomorrow.   Gotta get back to the salvage yard."

"If I can figure out how to bake stuff, you can come back for Thanksgiving," Xander called from the kitchen.

"Thanks, Xander.   I might do that."   He smiled, taking his own picture of the girl.   She was too adorable.   They'd be able to tell other hunters by their pictures of her some day.

***

Xander opened the gate, looking at the guy out there.   "Yes, I know the intercom is broken.   I've got to rewire the whole set.   Who're you?"

"Vin Tanner, Mr. Harris.   Chris and Buck needed something."

"They're to the right.   Stay on this side until you get to the pine tree then you can swerve a bit more to the left."   That got an odd look.   "Hold on.   Buck!   Chris!" he bellowed.   Chris came jogging out.   "Here, drive him in so he doesn't hit one of the mines that's not cleared yet.   I've got to rewire the intercom."   That got a nod and they drove back to the house.   Xander settled in to work on the system out there.   Just a few loose wires but it had to be fixed.   He hated to run out to the gate every time someone showed up.   He might shoot someone if they were selling something.   It was a good hike.   He finally came back and found his daughter in one of her less cute outfits.   "Why is she in jammies?"

"It's nearly time for bed," Sam told him. "Besides, she spit milk all over the puppy outfit."

"I guess I can wash it."

"Let her be a pumpkin or a kitty tomorrow."

"I can do that."   He gave his girl a cuddle.   "Ready for night-nights?"   She pouted.   "Don't do that, Izzy," he sighed.

Vin looked over then at his coworkers.   "They're going to drive you nuts."

"Too late," Buck said with a smirk.   "Chris can't glare the boy into anything."

Vin giggled.   "Can't do it, Cowboy?   Someone fiercer than your glare?"

"When you've faced down huge ass things that want to eat you, he's nothing," Xander said, looking over at them with an evil smirk.   "He's nowhere near as bad as looking at the kraken monster or the mayor.   Or hey, even zombies can scowl better."   He grinned.   Then he walked her inside to get a book to read to her tonight.   It was their nighttime ritual.   He yawned halfway through.

Dean walked in.   "Totally blew his ego, dude."   He plucked his pouting niece out of Xander's arms.   "Let me, Xander.   You go nap.   You've been on the go all day."   Xander nodded, going to bed.   Dean sat down in the rocking chair, looking down at her.   "A book on puppies?   Or want a story about how I totally kicked a demon's butt?"   She sucked her thumb, staring at him.   So he settled in to tell her about how he kicked the last demon's butt and saved Sammy, who had been knocked out.   She fell asleep during it but that was the point of a bedtime story.   He carefully put her down and covered her then started her mobile.   He left once her nightlight was on and the main lights off, going to check on Xander.   He was already asleep.   He came out to find Chris glaring in the kitchen.   "I'd consider it a compliment."

"I didn't know he saw the kraken."

Dean shrugged.   "Who said he hasn't seen another one?"

"Good point.   He napping?"

"Both of them are in bed."

"Could've sworn she had you tied up, Dean," Sam said from his seat.   "Not the other way around."

"Not that one.   The witch last month."

Sam grimaced.   "Don't make me look that woosey, Dean.   She knocked me out and I had a concussion."

"I told her that."   He smirked at his little brother.   Then at Chris.   "I'd still consider it a compliment, dude."

"I probably should.   Does he have any fear left?"

"Not much for normal people.   Then again, most of us who hunt don't.   Bad guys don't usually have anything on demons."   He went in to get something to drink, coming out find Chris had went back to talk to his people.   He saw his father come in.   "Pumpkin or kitty cat tomorrow?"

"Don't do that."

"She likes them apparently."   He shrugged.   "She's a girl, she should be cute.   That's a young girl's job."

"I know, still too much cuteness in a row."

"Like that'll stop her?" Sam snorted.   "Wait until she's a mouthy kid."

"Meme!" she yelled.

"Go to sleep," Dean called back.   She squealed unhappily so they went in to check on her.   "Shit," he shouted, bringing his father.   His father shot the mouse for him.   "There, princess."   Xander came running in.   "Mouse.   It woke her up."

"Why?"   He checked, letting Dean get the one in her bed.   "Where did they come from?"

"Let me check," John said, checking the ceiling.   Not there but there was a newly opened hole in the wall.   He put down a few traps and went to check the other side of the wall.   It was the bathroom.   He put down another trap and went to check the attic then the basement levels.   He found the next and shot a few more.   It was good stress relief.   Maybe he'd go back with Bobby.   This was too much domestication.   He hadn't been this domesticated since he had been married.   And not even Dean had been that cute as a kid.   Maybe his son was right and it was sapping his macho strength in some sort of girl radiation.

***

Tara finally managed to get away from Willow.   She appeared in the backyard and snuck into the kitchen.   Dean grinned and handed over the kitty dressed girl, getting a coo back.   Sam took a picture of them together.

"T..t..t..t," Izzy stuttered with a happy grin.

Xander leaned in.   "I think it's cute she stutters your name because you do."

"Oh, no.   I didn't want to teach her that."

He kissed her on the forehead.   "She only does it on your name because you do."   He grinned.   She grinned back.   "She's dressed like your kitty."

"I can see that," she said quietly, smiling at her niece.   "Such a happy girl."   She waved at her auntie.   "C'mon, we'll go sit and talk."   She carried her off, squeaking when se saw the strange men.

"Tara, that's the ATF agents who're taking the mines out of the ground around the house," Dean told her.   "Don't be scared of them.   They're decent guys."   She gave them a sideways look but took Izzy somewhere else to talk to her.

"Try the basement, Tara.   It's carpeted and if you're moving in I'll fix it up for you."   She kissed him on the cheek as she walked past him.   "That way I don't turn my daughter into some truck driving lesbian who hates men," he decided, going back to his laundry duty.   "This washer sucks."

Dean came in to look, showing him how to use the old wringer washer that was partially electric.   At least it spun and swished by itself.   Then they wrung it out and put it into the dryer.   They had a lot of them to do with how often she messed up her clothes.   Bobby came in from checking his car over.   He found Tara.   "Miss," he said, making her squeak.  "Sorry."

"H..h..hi?" she asked, guarding the baby.

"Don't be that afraid of me.   I'm Bobby.   I was there when she was born."   She blushed.   "Don't be like that.   I just came in to get a hug before I had to head home."   She handed him the baby since she was begging for him.   "Thanks, Izzy.   You're a special little girl to make so many hunters coo over you."   She smiled at him.   He hugged her back.   "I'll miss you but I gotta get back to work."

"Good girl," Dean agreed, coming down to look over his shoulder.   "You taking Dad?   He's looking antsy."

"Probably."   He gave her a good hug then handed her back to Tara.   "Thanks, Tara."   She gave him a shy smile.   "If you need us, you call.   I'm about a day away."

"Y..yes, sir."

"Good girl."   He patted her on the head then left.

Dean showed her the puppy picture.   "That was yesterday."   She cooed and cuddled the baby.   "She could use more of a girl influence than Sammy."   She giggled so he left them alone.

"You were so adorable," she whispered to the girl.    She caught the thing coming down the stairs, looking at the catalog.   "Your daddy is very pushy, Izzy."

Izzy smiled and snuggled in.   She had missed her favorite cuddly female one.   They both squealed when an explosion went off outside.

Xander leaned out the front door.   "Guys, did you blow yourselves up?" he called.

"Just the robot," Vin called back.   "One wasn't marked."

"Not my map, dude.   But sorry."   He went back inside.   "No need for bandaids."

"Good, though it'd probably be more like a trauma unit," Bobby said.   He flipped off the switch again.   "Did we flip it on by accident?"   It flipped itself back on while they were standing next to it.   "Kyle, if that's you, this is Xander.   He owns here.   Caleb gave it to him to protect his baby girl."   John walked in.   He flipped off the mines.   The switch flipped itself back on.

"Either the mice are telekinetic, or we're being haunted," Xander said.

"We can fix that.   I know where Kyle's buried," John admitted.   He and Bobby gathered their stuff and went to the old graveyard out back to make sure it wasn't one of them.   Even if they had to salt and burn the whole place.   Xander came out an hour later with a pitcher of water but shook his head.   "No?"

"No.   Still happening.   Was it haunted before maybe?"

"Kyle never said anything," Bobby admitted.   "I have no idea where his journal would be to check either."

"Then we do it the harder way and banish it back to its rest."   He went to help Tara do that.   Sam took over for him.   So he got to hold the baby and watch.   She finished and the switch-flipping creature left with a wail of sound and noise.   He looked down at his daughter.   "See, not that bad."   She turned her head to blink up at him.   "Hey, um, Sam, didn't she have your eyes before?"   Sam looked and groaned, going to get Bobby to get some holy water.   They'd need it to depossess her.   Then the spirit would be truly gone.   Or else Xander would be curing it by dealing with it in a more permanent manner when he went to hell to destroy it all.   Dean took the baby to hold while they did the exorcism.   John tried but Dean glared so he had to back off.

Buck and Chris watched while Vin finished the report on why the robot had been blown up.   It was only their toy to test, not to wreck, so they had paperwork.   Chris looked at Buck.   "Can you do that?"

"Not really well.   I know enough to know when to call someone and identify what it could be if it's one of the mundane things.   Not do that stuff."   Chris nodded once and got back to the minefield.   Once he had checked the switch again.   Just in case because he didn't want to go home in a mason jar after a mine blew him up.

***

Xander sat down across from Faith with Izzy.   It was visiting day and the boys had the house, and the minefield, well in hand.   "The guard said she was too cute."

"I can agree to that.   Are you a kitty, precious?"   Izzy smiled and waved.   "You make a good kitty."

"She's Auntie Tara's kitty today."   He smiled, handing over a new envelope.   "New letter, calling card, stamps, that stuff."

"Thanks, X."   She looked at him.   "They're trying."

"I know.   Riley's guys are mostly still okay.   Even if Riley is having an issue with some of the vamps."   She moaned.   "He went to feeding them for a bit to cheat on Buffy.   Since she's back and helping them clean up a little bit, until it gets to her again, he's back to doing that.   His wife isn't pleased."

"Charming.   It's still a soap opera I see."

"I'm in Montana."   She laughed, nodding.   He put the baby on the table, letting her cuddle her auntie.   "They were nice when they checked her over.   Made me strip her but otherwise it was fine."

"That's mean of them but I guess I understand why.   How are you, Izzy?"   The baby beamed at her and leaned over to kiss her on the forehead.   "Aww, I needed that.   It's been a bad week."

"I asked," Xander admitted.   "Are you okay?"

"I only broke up the fight," she admitted.   "My cellmate was one and I didn't want to be pulled into it.   Let her and her girlfriend fight somewhere else."

"I get that."   He leaned on the table.   "So, what's going on otherwise?"

"No clue.   Wes hasn't been back in a week.   Or is there a reason you showed up this time?"

"She wanted to see you before her birthday."

"Isn't that in a few months?"

"Month and a half," he admitted with a grin.   "But Montana has snow."

"That explains a lot."

"Plus we've got a few ATF agents who keep coming up to bug us over the former owner's stuff.   He did neat things like have a minefield around the house and put stuff into the well to hide the guns.   Little things like that."   The nearest guard gave him an odd look.   "My house's former owner."   That got a nod.   "We have ATF agents who show up to deal with things for us."   He looked at Faith's amused look.   "If they wanna remove mines, less chance of me being blown up.   Though I did get a deer this year.   One came up to nibble so we got the back end."   Faith snickered.   "Messy too.   Izzy squealed in disgust at it."

"Baba," she said happily, beaming at her father.

"I don't have your bottle.   The guards do."   She pouted at one when Faith pointed at him for her.   "You should see her scowl.   Even the ATF agent in charge said hers was nearly as fierce as his."

Faith cackled.   "She'll be one hell of a girl, X."

"Hopefully.   Tara's helping me so I don't warp her into a truck driving, butch lesbian who hates men for being men."

"I saw Red last visiting time and she said she had left her."

"To my basement.   She's got a nice room of her own.   She's even gotten to the point where she'll talk to the agents instead of running from them.   One was very nice and calmed her down the last time she got uber shy."   Faith nodded at that.   "So that's Izzy.   She's grown a ton."

"I can tell.   Last time I saw you, you were tiny."   She poked her on the stomach.   "Still a bit pudgy."

"Her doc said she's fine."

"Good."   The baby smiled at her, patting her on the head.   "They're saying my next parole hearing is next month.  Someone pulled some strings to get it moved up."

"Good.   Let's hope you get out of here.   If only so you keep your sanity, Faith," he said quietly.   She stared at him.   "I don't think this sort of environment is good for anybody, even if it is necessary in a few cases."   She gaped.   He smiled.   "I'm a bit deeper than some think."   He shrugged.   "It's clear you're not eating again."

"It's been nasty crap again."

"Sorry to hear that."   She cuddled the baby.    He looked around, spotting someone coming in.   "You lucky girl you."

She looked where he was. "Red," she said in greeting.   "Hey."

"Hi, Faith."   She gave her a quick hug and handed over a letter.   "From Fred, Wes, and Gunn."   She sat down, staring at the baby.   "Hi, Izzy."   Izzy pouted at her.   "Want Auntie cuddles?"   She clung to Faith.   "You look adorable.   Tara told me about the kitty outfit."

"She's nearly grown out of it," Xander said.   "Her puppy one too."    That got a smile.   "We're looking for more cute stuff."

"That's cool.   What's up, Red?"

"Nothing much.   Wes would be here but he broke his leg last week during a fight."

"Happens to the best of us," Xander agreed.   "We can stop in there on the way home."

Willow pouted.   "You're not staying?"

"Nope.   There's a huge snow coming in four days by the weather reports.   I need to get back to the house or I might not be able to get up my road.   I live in the middle of nowhere."

"So Tara said.   Is she okay?"

"She's fine.   She was busy painting the library when I left."   He grinned at his oldest friend.   "She's been good at teaching Izzy girl stuff."   He looked at Faith again.   "She's also been working on my cooking skills.   I'm pretty damn good if I do say so myself.   Thanksgiving went really well."   Faith grinned.   "I made a *huge* dinner for her other family.    Mostly because half of them can close out a buffet like Buffy can after a patrol night."   Faith snickered.   "Izzy got her first turkey and liked it a lot.   Tara had a lot of veggies and stuff for her since she doesn't eat meat.   That's when the deer blew itself up for a nibble of grass too so I got field dressing lessons from Bobby and John.   He's finally quit giving me dirty looks for giving him a granddaughter.   At first it was really bad.   He gave me 'you dirty whore' looks and then it toned down from there after a few good mood swings."

"You didn't have to have her, Xander," Willow complained.   He gave her a look.   She shrank down because she remembered what would've happened.   "Never mind."

"Just don't make me have a second one.   Tara had to end a spell around my stomach the other day thanks to something that wanted Sammy to have a more suitable heir."

"Hell," she muttered.   "She okay?"

"She's fine and Sam went to have his version of a mood swing on it."   Faith laughed.   A few people looked their way.   "Yeah, it was very pretty."

"Damn, X.   Still not bored?"

"Many days a week because I need to get the satellite turned on but I waited too long.   Now the guy can't get up to the house."   He gave her a slightly insane look.   "I don't like reading that much and there's only so many times you can clean your guns.   Now I know why the ancient settlers had kids every winter; nothing else to do all day."   That got a cackle from Faith.   "Really.   There's not."

"You're so bad," she snorted.   She saw someone scowl.   "Oh, crap."

Xander looked then at the guard.   "There's an older restraining order for her and all her fellow cult members to not come near my daughter," he said calmly.   "Because she's the one they consider a saint."   The guard nodded.   "I'm very sorry if they come over if you don't stop her.   I don't want to be mean."

"Let us handle it, sir."   He called that in and another guard got put into the room to make sure it didn't come to blows.   They went back to talking while Lehane cuddled that cute little baby.   The guards were all amused by the kitty suit.   She was adorable but not a saint since she was trying to suck on her aunt.   He went to get her a bottle the father had left at the checkpoint, handing it over once it had been checked by one of the guys.   "She drinks plain milk?"

"Now and then she likes it better than formula.   She's having a fussy day.   She wants her aunt to feed her veggies."   He let Faith feed her.   Izzy cuddled her and loved her for it.   "Now you can't be picked on for baby hickeys."

"I don't mind hickeys.   Better her than my cellmate trying to give me one."   They shared a look and he patted her on the wrist.   "Thanks, X."

"Soon, Faith.   You'll get out soon and find real sanity and all that again," he said quietly.   She nodded at that.   "And again, once you're ready, we'll come help you.   That's not a problem.   Sunnydale has real cable and isn't in the middle of a minefield."

"Really?" she asked dryly.   "How many are left?"

"After two months of on and off cleaning them out, it's down to about sixty or seventy in the back woods around the fence.   I might leave those up since someone tried to break in the other day to get Izzy."

"Job or cult?" Faith asked.

"Neither.   He saw her at the store, thought she was adorable, and I was too soft to not stop him.   Pity but the Sheriff didn't puke at his injuries.   Tara pulled me off him," he said with a sweet smile.   "And called the Sheriff.   He was very amused that their problem resident was stopped."

"Good job," Faith agreed.   "Slime like that don't deserve to live."

He shrugged.   "I nearly dropped him on one of the mines but the ATF guy was sleeping in their truck."   She smiled and shook her head.   "He was not happy either.   Tried to scowl at me again.   Told him I saw worse on Spike.   Who showed up recently."   He looked at Willow.   "He said he was heading for Dallas."

"We heard.   He wanted to eat someone rich so he could have some extra spending cash."   She shrugged.   "Vampires, what're you going to do about them?"

Faith shook her head quickly.   "Now I remember why I slipped over the edge of sanity."

"Hey, I had him as a roomie for a bit," Xander said dryly.   "When Giles got in some international booty action, I had to duct tape him in my recliner for a bit."   Faith snickered, shaking her head.   "I didn't want his blood breath near me or anything."   They shared a look.

"He was helpless, Xander," Willow complained.   "We treated him badly."

He looked at her.   "What kept him from getting a minion to do something nasty to us?"   She gaped.   "Or even making non-hurting plans.   The same things that could've embarrassed us could have hurt us.   His chip wouldn't have reacted to that.   It didn't when he tried to do it to Buffy."

She moaned, shaking her head.   "I didn't think about that."

"That's because you want people to be nice sorts," Faith told her.   Willow nodded that was true.   "So, X, job?"

"We found some money the former owner had stashed before he died.   I'm set for the winter.   Though Dean does want me to get a pickup truck."

"Sounds like you could use one."

He nodded.   "Definitely if I want out before May or so.   I've got my old clunker at the shop anyway.   I'll be looking when I go back."   She nodded.   "That way I get something good on snow and ice."

"Hopefully it'll work for you."   She looked down at the napping baby resting against her chest.   "She's a good girl," she said quietly.

"She's too much like me for that," he said dryly.   "She was taunting the local minister's wife the other day in the store."   Faith gave him a horrified look.   "She was.   She was teasing her and then acting shy and coy, then outrageous to get the attention back."   He saw someone coming their way but the guard headed them off.   "I personally think she was trying to flirt her into cookies since she smelled some on her."   Faith grinned, shaking her head.   "I did too.   They had a church bake sale.   She didn't like fudge so much but she loved the coconut cookies someone made."

"Good to know."

"Like I said, you can show up and bake for her pleasure too, Faith," he said with a grin.   "Even if I will feel like I should be in Utah with having two girls in the house."

She snorted.   "Not gonna happen that way, X."

"I know that.   I said that to Tara and made her cackle though."   Willow pouted at him.   "She enjoys my mind going odd from lack of things to do."

"You're warping my Tara from a sweet, good girl into some heathen brat, aren't you?" Willow complained.

"No, she's just relaxing finally.   It's doing her good.   She's barely stuttering around the agents or me.   Now and then in town but not around those she's used to."

"That's fine I guess.   When is she coming back?"

"That's up to her, Willow.   Not like I'm keeping her hostage to fuss over my daughter's clothes."   He looked at Faith again, watching her watch Izzy nap on her.   "You know, some year you can have one of those wailing, screaming, crapping things of your own," he reminded her.   "Then we can teach you how to clean dirty diapers and stuff."

She looked at him.   "Not my thing.   I'll be a good aunt."

"You're a very good aunt.   She loves me to read your letters to her."   Faith gave him a dirty look.   "She doesn't get to hear the bad stuff, even if she wouldn't understand it."   He looked at the door then grimaced.   "You lucky, lucky girl you."   She looked then groaned.  "Council?"

"Yeah.   Toady."   She shifted the baby to her other side so the side he'd have to sit on would be free in case she had to hit him.   The guard shooed off another person coming near them.   "What's up?" she asked him when he sat down.

"I came to check on you for Travers."   He nodded at the others.   "Are you two back?"

"When it's safe for my daughter to be there, I'll be back to back her up," Xander told him.   That got a grimace.   "We kinda proved the approach worked.   Look how long Buffy lasted."   He stared him down.   "Worship at the altar of cuteness that is my daughter or not, dude, but don't piss me off."   He looked at Willow then at Faith again.   "I think she's mid-growth spurt.   She's always napping and she's not sick.   She did the same thing the last one."

"Babies are supposed to grow," Willow said.   "Can I hold her?"

"You can hold her later," Xander said firmly.   "Faith never gets to hold her."   He stared at the council's guy when he looked horrified.   "She's a favorite aunt like Tara is."

"We were wondering where the witch had went."

"My basement to be protected by the ATF agents finishing removing the mines from my yard."   The guy gave him a horrified look.   "It used to belong to another hunter.   That's how I got most of a deer this year on Thanksgiving."

"He was probably a bit paranoid.   A lot of them seem to be," Willow offered.   Xander nodded.   "Very?"

"Very.   They did finally get all the stuff he hid down the well.   Most of it was even waterproof sealed still."   He looked at Faith again.   "She loves you."

"She's very cuddly and a bit warm."

"It's the heat being on in here."   He checked her forehead.   "Not sick."

"Good.   I'd hate for her to puke on him or something.   Might horrify her later."   Xander grinned at that.   "Why else are you here?"

"Just to check up on you."

"I'm doing fine enough.   Food's been crappy lately.   My cellmate's having a fight with her girlfriend.   The little things that drive you nuts when you can't get away from them."

"I can understand that.   I did also come to tell you that the Council has appointed a new lawyer for your parole hearing next time.   He's a local boy, fairly well recommended."   He handed over the report on him since he was looking overprotective at the moment.

"Wolfram and Hart?" she asked.   "Where do I know that name from?"

Willow took it to look at.   "You got one of hell's own lawyers to represent her?" she demanded.   He looked stunned and a bit horrified.   "They're the reason Angel got sent to LA.   Because they keep trying to take over the world in that bad way."

"Oh, dear.   I'll report that later," he said, taking it back.   He looked at Xander, who shrugged.

"What do I know about evil lawyers?   The only one I've dealt with is over my parents' estate and they mostly had nothing left."

"I'm sorry to hear about that, Xander," Willow said, patting him on the arm.

He shrugged.   "Someone from high school who didn't make it to graduation."

"Oh, really sorry."

"It happens.   How's Dawn?   I haven't heard from her in a few weeks."

"She's having bad girl problems.   Somehow she's got a nasty boyfriend who Buffy threatened to nibble on and even Joyce said it was bad compared to Buffy's tastes."   Xander snorted at that.   "We don't know why she likes him but she seems to."

"If that's Mark, then it's friendship the last I heard.   He's got a crappy family life and she's being his normal person and light to guide him to a better future."   Willow looked stunned.   "She can have boy friends, Willow.   The same as you did.   Really.   She said Mark reminded her of me when I was younger."   He smirked.   "Her actual boyfriend's name was Earl I think.   One of yours I do believe," he told the watcher, who nodded.   "We do know that Dawn is sacred to most of the group?"

"It wasn't intentionally done.   It does vex his father and Travers quite a lot so they finally got them broken up last week."

"Huh.   Have to stop in and talk to her on the way home then," Xander decided.   He looked at Faith and his daughter.   "She's really loving your shoulder."

Faith looked down at the spot where the drool had come out.   "It washes and it smells better than most of the stuff around here.   We're cool."   She smiled at him.   "Thanks."

"Not an issue.   If you want to be snowed in, you can come over too when you get out."

"I might take you up on that.   Depending on how Sunnydale is."

Xander nodded.   "I can understand that."   The guard coughed so he looked at the woman coming over.   "Get away from my daughter please," he said calmly.   "Only family gets to worship at her cuteness."

"She is adorable."

"Everyone says that," Xander agreed.

"Catter, move away from the child," the guard ordered.   "Now.   You know better."   The prisoner moved away.   "Back to your visitors."   She scurried back.   He looked at Xander.  "Good instincts.   She's in here for hurting hers."

Xander nodded.   "Thanks then."

"Welcome.   She is adorable."

"Everyone says that," Xander said with a grin.   "I think her Wiccan auntie cast a spell on her or something before birth."   The guard laughed.   He looked at Willow, who shook her head quickly at that accusation.   "You sure?"

"Very."

"Good."   He smiled at Faith again.   "If they'd let me, I'd smuggle in food."

"Not allowed," she agreed.   "I know.   It'll be fine.   It was beans all week and I can't stand them.   They turn my stomach."   He nodded at that.    "I'll be okay, X.   Quit fussing.   I'm not your daughter."

"I'm good at fussing though.   She just focuses it until her other family comes to steal her from me for a bit.   Then I only get to fuss over Tara until she complains or swats me."

"Get a dog," Faith taunted with a smirk.

"Can't.   She's too young for a dog."   He shrugged.   "Some day.   Bobby has a dog he hunts with.   He said he'd help me train one to guard her."

"That might be a good idea," she agreed, glaring at someone.   "Yes, this is my niece, in quotes.   We know she's adorable."

The black woman smiled.   "She is but her head's laying funny."   Faith looked and adjusted it.   "She have problems?"

"A minor cult to her," Xander admitted.   "We're all a bit paranoid about her because of them.   How many do you have?"

"Three I'll hopefully get to see soon."   She patted the baby on the head then left the visiting area.

"That's a sucky situation to be in," Faith agreed quietly.

"In some places, children go to jail with their mothers if no one in the family will keep them," Willow said.   Faith shuddered.   "Exactly."   She looked at the baby.   "She's going to wiggle back down."

"She usually sleeps scrunched up into a little ball," Xander admitted.   "She likes to try to hide under her Tara bear too."

"You're certainly not the man I was led to believe you were," the Watcher said.

Xander snorted.   "Just because I'm cute and fussy with my daughter doesn't mean I don't kick ass very well."

"I see."

"The same as you can be an ass at home and an uptight ass here," Willow agreed.   "Home and in a fight are two different things."

"I'm formerly SIS, Miss Rosenburg."

"I never had that sort of training," Xander admitted.   "I got mine from the possession stuff and a few other places, including practice."

"Rupert never...."   Willow shook her head.   "We expected him to break the rules that far."

"No, I spared his aches and pains by sparring with Buffy a few times but no."

"Pity.   You could probably be trained now."

Xander nodded.   "If I want to, I can ask her other family to do it.   They're very good and they've been hunting for years."

"That's good to know.   How did she come into being?"   Xander pointed at Willow, who got a scowl.

"It was accidental.   I was muttering over the sink."

"Oh, that reason," he said, understanding it now.   He had seen that report.   Xander nodded.   "Is she healthy?"

"Very.   She had one massive bout of the flu so far.   She had some sniffles last week.   Nothing normal babies don't get and we do know that she's a perfectly normal baby.   The Host even said so."   He smiled sweetly.

"That's good to know.   Are you planning on others?"

Xander looked at Willow.   "I couldn't even if I wanted to.  Adding another realm might destabilize this one."

Xander waved a hand at her.   "She did it to me, not my choice.   So apparently not since it's not connected anywhere.   How long did Travers wait to get my medical records?"

"About two weeks after he found out."

"Ah."   He looked at Faith, who was snickering again.   He shrugged.   "Buffy broke Travers jaw when he wanted to meet Izzy to make sure she didn't have a mole.   That was around our first visit with you."

"I can understand that urge now and then.   He's controlling and an enema.  He's not fun enough to be a douche."

"Quite," the watcher said.   "But it's not an elected position.   None of us are mad enough at him to hire an assassin yet so we have to live with him until something eats him."

"Don't tempt me," Willow said with a sweet smile.   The watcher shuddered.   She looked at the baby then at Xander.   "Are you still mad?"

"I think she's a great thing in my life, but yeah, kinda.   I mean, would you be mad if the roles were reversed?"

She nodded.   "I'd never have spoken to you again."

He smirked.   "I'm less judgmental than you are, Willow.   Look at all the other stuff I forgave."

"Point," she said quietly, looking up at him.   "Tara's really happy?"

"I think the boredom is starting to infect her sanity too.   I heard her telling one of the agents a dirty joke the other night."

She shuddered.   "My poor witch."

"Who learned how to do that teleporting trick from you since she appeared in the backyard one day."   He gave her a look.   "If she hasn't, then that's her call."

"I know."   She pouted but she knew that.   "For what it's worth, I'm sorry, Xander."

"I know, Willow.   It's why I'm still talking to you."   He looked at Faith when she started to get up.   "We'll stop."

"I'm shifting to get off the numb parts, X.   Calm down."   She sat down again.   "There, that's nicer."   She looked down at the baby.   "She's very nappy today."

"Growth spurt," Xander sighed, nodding some.   "She'll be hyper all night because of that.  Maybe we'll go visit Angel tonight so she can stay up with him and keep him company."

"Gunn would kill you if her and Fred's squealing woke him up," Willow told him.

"Maybe but maybe she'll find the mice that Wesley was complaining about.   She did at the house.   Woke me up out of a sound sleep squealing in outrage that a mouse climbed in with her."   Faith burst out laughing.   "Seriously.   Grandpa showed up with a gun to get whatever had made her scream that way."

"She's one special little hellion, X," Faith said, giving him the baby back.   "There, enough mushiness for the day."

"She sucks it from you," Xander agreed.   "I think she's storing up to make a mushiness shield against any bullies she'll face in school."

"She'll have 'em wrapped around her finger in no time," Faith assured him.

"Quite possibly.   She does everyone else."   Even the watcher was cooing at her and wiggling his fingers to make her quit scowling since the move had woken her.   He and Faith shared a look.   "Wanna hear about snow?"

"I had plenty of snow in Boston," she told him.

"We only had snow once in Sunnydale.   It turned me invisible."

"Ah.   So big snow?"

"Huge snow last month.   We got trapped at the house with two of the ATF agents, who agreed that people in the old days had babies so they wouldn't be as bored all winter."   Willow moaned, shaking her head.   "Fortunately I've got a lot of wallboarding to do."

"That's at least something to do," Faith agreed.

"Tara's more than happy to paint once I get a room done.   She even did her room finally.   I had to take her to the paint place and drop her off for two hours but she relented when I came back for her.   She picked out a color and I got it for her.   It's now a very pale blue color.   Nearly white with a hint of blue."

"That's cool."   Faith smiled at the baby, getting a coo back and her holding out her arms.   "My arms are tired, sweetie.   I'll hold you again before you go."   The baby pouted.   "Aww.   Damn mushy feelings."

Xander laughed.   "Sucking more from you," he teased with a grin.

"Definitely but I don't need it here so it was only going to waste anyway.   Unless I go coo over the pregnant one on my block."

"I remember that feeling very well."   He smiled.   "Sometimes you mind and sometimes you don't."

"She does most of the time."

"She's probably scared that someone will hurt her or the baby, Faith," he said gently.

"Maybe.   I'll talk to her later in the yard, see if that's the issue."   She shrugged.   "I'd never hurt a kid.   Even when I was bad I couldn't do that."   He patted her again, getting a dirty look from the guard.   "Chill, dude.   I slept with him once.   That's the only free ride he's ever going to get."

"Wasn't that free.   You nearly threw out my back," Xander said dryly.   "Since you were on top...."   She actually blushed at that and he grinned.   "Good, got you back," he said with an evil smirk.   She swatted him but laughed.   One of the cult members came over.   He gave the guard a look.   He tried to shoo them off but they stared at the baby.   "Willow?"   She glared at the women.

"Ladies, that is my niece," Faith said firmly.   "Leave the cuteness alone.   Now."

"She's truly a saint.   She redeemed you," one said in awe.

Xander looked back at her.   "Were you there the last time I had to deal with you guys or just in the town takeover attempt?"   They went pale.   "Faith is better because *she* wanted to be better.   No outside force can make you a better person.   She's reformed because she wanted to be.   Not because my daughter is so adorable.    Now, shoo before I start having flashbacks to the day I had to take her back from your cult."   They fled again.  He relaxed again.   "Sorry," he said with a charming smile for them.

"You were kinda scary from what Buffy said," Willow admitted.

"Just because I pulled the front of their church off and had to go in to retrieve her," Xander said dryly.   "Doesn't mean I'm not still scary over my daughter."

"Clearly so," Faith agreed, taking the baby back.   Most of them left her alone.   Even when she was being bathed in the glow of adorable babyness.   "Are we doing anything special for her birthday?"

"A huge cake and stuff.   If no one can get in, we'll have a party when they can.   Her dad is threatening to have Willow send him there magically."

"I like that about Sam," Willow complained.   "He's very hands-on when he's around."

"Yeah, he is."   He smiled.   "He doesn't resent her and he loves her.   Even if she is crapping right now."   He sighed.   The guard looked and laughed.   "We should probably go so the watcher can talk to you, Faith."   She pouted. "Use the calling card to call the next time you get phone time.   Not like I'm going to be busy.   And we'll be back in a few months, when we can get out of the snow."   He took her back when she fussed.   "I know but your diaper bag is in the rental car."   He looked at her.   "Sorry."

"It happens.   I'd crap too if I had a cult to me and the members wouldn't leave me alone."   He smiled.   Then he leaned over to kiss her on the cheek before leaving with the baby and her bottle.   Faith smiled at Willow.   "If you had to screw up so majorly, she's a good one to have made."

"Yeah, she is.   But I'm better now, just like you are."

"Good.   Gotta say, that shit scares me, Red."

"It does me too sometimes," she admitted.   She looked at the council toady.   "Anything else?"   He shook his head, running off to make a report about what he had heard.   She settled in to chat with Faith about the group.   She never got the good news.   Faith got more than she did sometimes.

***

Xander walked Izzy into the Hyperion later that afternoon.   "The cuteness is here," he called.

Cordelia looked up.   "Of course I am.   Where else would I be?"

Xander stopped to look at her.   "You're not Cordelia."   Gunn gaped at him.   "Hey, Gunn."   He looked at him then handed over the baby.   "Can you protect her for a minute?"   Gunn nodded slowly, backing away with the baby.   Xander moved closer, splashing her with the holy water Bobby had made him start to carry.   She shrieked and lunged for him.   He grabbed the dagger off her desk and went after her, pinning her after a few minutes.   "Knew you weren't Cordy.   She's better than that.   So either you're possessing her or mimicking her.   Either way I'd hop off.   Now.   Before I have to go Sunnydale style on your ass."

"Xander?" Wesley asked, limping out.   "What are you doing?"

"Not Cordy."

"We were sure it wasn't but we couldn't prove it."

"He splashed her with holy water or something," Gunn said, handing Wesley the baby.   Izzy smiled and patted Wesley.   "Do we need chains, Xander?"

"Probably not."   He stared down at her.   The demon bucked.   Xander rode it and pushed her back against the floor, starting the exorcism ritual.

"Cute from one who's so easily possessed," the demon sneered.

"Bobby helped me fix that, dear.   Now it'll only happen if I want it to."   He kept going, making her shriek and try to get him off her.   "Hmm, not possessed."   He looked at the dagger, then twitched his hand so the holy water went down the blade.   Then he stabbed her in the stomach.   "I've had enough of staking my friends and family.   Thankfully for you."   The demon turned into a puddle of goo and ash.   Xander got up, dusting himself off.   His daughter hooted and cooed at him.   "Thanks, Izzy.   Good to know you still like me."   He looked up.   "Can we have her back now?" he shouted.   Cordelia appeared in a flash of light.   He stared at her.    "Well?"

"Ugly shirt, Xander."

"Yay.   Prove it."

She looked at him then snorted and said something Latin, making Wesley blush.   "So there."

He smirked.   "But I liked it."   He pointed at the baby.   "Cuteness alert."

"I can see that."   She stole the baby to cuddle.   "C'mon, Isabelle.   We'll make sure you're a normal girl and Xander hasn't infected you already."

"Tara's making sure of that."

"We wondered where she had went," Wesley said, clearing his throat.

Xander looked at him.   "She never learned that word in the other languages we had to know to research."   Wesley stomped off still blushing.   He grinned at Gunn.   "Thanks."

"Welcome."   He watched Xander follow Cordelia, shaking his head quickly.   Xander was just...strange in too many ways to think about for too long.   Him and Cordelia had to be like fire and ice when they were together.   "Angel, Fred, Xander's here with the baby."   Fred's squeal echoed all the way down the stairs until it caught up with her when she snatched the baby from Cordelia.

"I'm me, Fred, not the demon."   She took the baby back.   Fred pouted so got the baby to cuddle.

"Don't blow her ego up any more," Xander complained.   "Her cult tried to worship her at the prison when I went to see Faith."   He sat down, watching them coo over his daughter.   Though he did call Joyce's house.   "I'm at the Hyperion with Izzy."   He hung up.   Ten minutes later Joyce and Dawn walked in.   Dawn stole the baby from Fred, dancing around with her.   "I hear you and the watcher spawn broke up."

"Yup.   His daddy made him or else he'd disown him."   She looked at him.   "Did you correct them on that one issue?"

"Yeah."   He looked at Joyce.   "She's not dating that one.   She said he reminds her of a younger me so she's helping him find a normal, good life."

"I figured she was.   It was Willow who was concerned she was dating him."

Xander rolled his eyes.   "Figures.   No bouncing or shaking, Dawn."

"I'm not.   Aren't you adorable as a kitty?" she cooed.

"Way too much cuteness for me," Cordelia said.

Fred nodded.   "Only the really young and innocent can get away with that sort of cuteness."

Xander snorted.   "She crapped on Grandpa on purpose the last time he was in for the night.   He didn't want to get up and help with her bath so she crapped down his arm and shoulder.   Then she gave him this shit-eating smile and cooed in his ear."   The ladies all laughed at that.   "John did help her get her bath that night, like she wanted, and then he got his own."

"That's my girl," Dawn said happily.   "You just wrap those nasty boy things around your hand, sweetheart."

Xander looked at Joyce.   "We're going to have a lot of snow soon so she's getting in her birthday visiting."

"That's reasonable.   I know Montana has a lot of snow."   She took the baby from her daughter, weathering the daughter's pout.   Izzy smiled at her too.   "Hello, Izzy.   I haven't seen you in months.   You've grown a lot."

"And she's in that sleepy, hyper, wiggling growth spurt stage again," Xander said dryly.   "She's going to have Sam's height."

"Sam's only a few inches taller than you," Cordelia pointed out.

"Yeah.   Dean's my height."   He watched them coo and play with his daughter.   "So, how's things beyond the demon not-you?" he asked.

"Good enough," Cordelia admitted.   "Coming up on a rare solstice apocalypse event."

He nodded once, then glanced at Dawn and back, getting a nod.   "I can do that.   Tara could use some help painting and keeping us from being bored."

Joyce looked over.   "Are we sure this time?   Last time it was nothing but a small earthquake."

"Definitely," Cordelia agreed.    "I saw it while I was trapped."   Dawn sighed, stamping a foot.   "You'll get to help Tara warp her back to a girly girl, Dawn."

"Fine."   She took the baby back to babble and coo at.   She was the best niece ever and she could teach her all sorts of girl stuff when she was older.

***

Dawn got out of the new truck.   "Are you sure it won't set you back too far, Xander?"

"No, Dawn," he said patiently.   "I'm sure it won't."   He looked at her.   "Get the baby?"   She got in to get the baby out, weathering her pout for being forgotten.   He opened the door and got the first of the bags of food.   "Don't put her down, she'll try to help."

"Sure."   She went to find Tara with the baby.   She snuck up behind her to hug her, making Tara squeak.   "Major apocalypse trial run in LA."

"T...t...t..ta!" Izzy said happily, hugging her too.

"My baby girl," she said, giving her a hug.   "And my little sister."

"Wow, living with Xander has done wonders, Tara," Dawn teased.   "You're wearing his shirt, pants, which I never see you wear, and not stuttering.   Miracle of Izzy's?"

Tara pinched her hard on the arm.   "No."   She smiled.   "I've done a lot of thinking because I'm always surrounded by men here."

Dawn laughed.   "I can understand that.   He told me I could flirt with the ATF agents when they came back as long as they all blushed and walked off mumbling or moaning."

Tara pinched her again.   "How long are you staying for?"

"At least a week.   More if we get snowed in.   Xander's hauling in groceries."

"And I've got it," Xander called.   "Tara, settle her in the guest room?"

"Sure, Xander."   She got her settled in back there, with Izzy's help of course.   Otherwise the baby would wiggle her way out to play in the snow.   She got Izzy dressed for playing and herself, then leant Dawn something to wear too.   Then they went to watch him work while playing in the snow with the baby.   She loved snow.

Xander paused to look at his squealing offspring.   "It's too cold for her."

"It's not," Tara said firmly. "Hush."

"Fine."   He carried in the last load then came out to sit down with them.   "Hey, Izzy, can I have a cuddle?"   Izzy waved with a huge grin.   "Yes, hi.   It's the daddy.   Can I have a cuddle?"   She patted his leg and threw snow at him.   "I guess that's good enough."   He cleared off an area to sit since he didn't have on snow pants, getting down to help her play with the snow.   He looked over as another pickup pulled up.   "That's the lead agent's truck."

"Cool," Dawn said with an evil smirk.

"He's a widow," he said in her ear.   "Go easy on him."

"Fine.   Take my fun."   Two guys got out.   "The other?"

"Pick away.   He's a bit uptight but he flirts with Tara to make her blush.   Hey, Buck, Chris.   Look, a useful vehicle."

Chris looked.   "Unless it has four wheel drive, not that much, kid."

"It does.   The salesman was very helpful when he heard I lived up here with the baby.   I had him put lifters on it too in case we had to go through some deeper snow."   Chris looked confused.

"Like the gang kids' cars?" Buck asked.

"Yeah, those.    It'll lift it another six inches."

"I can lend you a few CD's to play," Dawn teased.   Tara shook her head, rolling her eyes.   "It'll be cute.   He can be the only thug around here."

"There's two in town but they think I'm tragically old, even though I'm from near LA and can quote their favorite songs better than they can," Xander told her.   "You guys, this is Dawn.   Buffy's little sister.   LA's getting ready to have an issue soon."

Chris nodded politely at her.   "Miss."

"Try my name, Agent Stick Up The Ass.   Really, I respond to it," she said.   Then she smiled sweetly.

"Izzy must've learned that look from you," Buck teased.

She cackled.   "Quite possibly.   It clearly wasn't Tara."

"I think she learned it from Dean," Xander admitted.   "He has a better one than even I do."   Both girls threw snow at him.   Izzy added to it with a happy coo.   "Thanks, Izzy.   Good to know you're a girl too."

Chris shook his head.   "Okay, kid.   Someone said you were buying weapons?"

"I was?   Beyond the new shotgun I got at the pawn shop?"

Chris nodded.   "They were talking like artillery.   Since it came from Caleb...."

"Oh, that must be the stuff I found in LA that Angel said to take with me.   It won't be here until tonight.   I raided a few demons' nests to get it.   Though, did I call Caleb?"

"No, he said his contacts told him you were being more paranoid than the old owner was," Buck said.

"Well, I did make some new mines for around the fence.    Hmm."   He considered it.   "Nope, just that stuff I conveniently found lying around in a demon's lair.   And the shotgun from the pawn shop because mine's not in that caliber but we seem to have a lot of bullets in it."

"I didn't know pawn shops could sell guns."

"I don't know about in Denver, but the ones here do."

Dawn nodded.   "Some of the ones in LA do take guns in at least.   It's on their signs."

Chris sighed.   "You will let us look at the new stuff."

"If you want to haul it that bad, Wesley's driving the truck.   He should be about six hours from here," Xander offered.   "I can try his cell.   He might have service."

"We can wait," Chris said.   "That way no news crew catches it and thinks that you're a terrorist or anti-government sort."

"Well, now and then I don't like them or what they're doing, but it's too much work to take down DC as a whole to get them all."

Chris looked at him.   "You say stuff like that again and I've got to arrest you."

"Fine.   Make them leave me alone?"

"Taxman?" Buck asked.

"No, I went to talk to them about the found money.   They were more than happy to help me fill out the proper forms and pay on it."   They both snickered.   "Then I told them I was spending it all to fix up the house.   He said he expected a young guy like me to blow through it.   I held up my daughter's picture and he cooed.   He suggested I put her in pageants."

"Eww," Dawn said.   "They dress some of those girls up like hos."

"Which is why I'd never do that," Xander said sweetly, giving her a look.   She smirked back.   "Keep it up, do high school here, Dawn."

"Yes, Xander."   She sighed, looking at them.   "See how he threatens me?   You guys should spank him so he's better to me."   Tara pinched her again.   "Hey!   Meany!   Xander said I could talk to them."

"Behave," she ordered quietly, giving her a look.   Dawn smirked back.   "Please?   They're nice."

"I know."   She smiled.   "I can pick on you guys, right?   Tara seems to think you're like big brothers and I pick on Xander horribly since he's my big brother."

"I fell asleep while pregnant and she gave Izzy a smiley face target to kick," Xander agreed.

"If I end up pregnant I'm going to kill the witch," Chris told him.

"We kept him from ending Willow once we found out where she was hiding as a mouse," Dawn told him.   "Why did you get a dark blue truck, Xander?"

"So I can find it in the snow."

"Oh.   Makes sense I guess."

"Goes with all my shirts," he teased.

She looked at Tara.   "You've done good with him.   Cordy would be proud."   Tara gave her a look and pinched her again, making Izzy throw snow at her.   Dawn laughed.   "See, she agrees with me."

"She might but she's still young and I have manners."

"Buck doesn't," Chris told her.   Dawn cracked up at that.   "What route is he taking?"   Xander shrugged.   "Didn't plan this?"

"Rent a U-haul and move it?   No."

"Fine."   He went to make them some coffee and try to find the way into the storage areas from the inside again.   He found one but it had boxes.   He looked in one and grimaced at the books in Latin in it.   He couldn't find any connection to any of the others.

Xander looked at Buck.   "How is his stick up the butt?   Is Vin hurt again?"

"Yup.   Got shot in the shoulder last week.   He's fine but fussy."

"That happens to him too," Dawn agreed.   "Then we tie him down and baby him until he finally gets free.   Then we made him take even more babying until he was better.   He quit getting hurt so much."

"I'll have to suggest that to Chris," he said, heading inside.   "He's probably looking for the other storage areas again."

"Of course he is," Xander agreed.   "Are you guys going to be able to handle that demon on your own or not?"

"What demon?"

"The one who wants to eat your local courthouse in Denver because you have one of his spawn on trial."   Buck groaned.   "Newspaper was beside the phone."   Buck went to look.  Tara got up to get it for him.   He shrugged at Dawn's look.   "It's one they'd need artillery for."

"Of course it is.   Way to hide, Xander."

"Yeah, well, has to happen so blow it out your butt, Dawn."

"I can't fart on cue."   She ducked the swat and got back to playing with the baby.   "Hi, Izzy.   Ready to go in?"   The baby's face was red and cold.   "C'mon, let's see if you like cocoa.   I make excellent cocoa.   Mommy taught me."   She carried her inside.

Xander got up with a groan, heading in too.   He closed the door behind him, heading to change out of his cold, damp clothes first then to get his own cocoa.   "Hey, Chris, Dawn is a champion cocoa maker thanks to her mom.   Want some?" he yelled once he had his.

"No thanks."

"Cocoa's a good thing," Buck agreed, taking his mug.

"Mom uses it to help vampires talk about their former love lives.   Spike was back in town again, Xander."   He nodded he knew that.   "He came to mom to talk about Dru again because she caught him for a day."

"As long as she's not here," Xander quipped.   "Or else Angel can pout when I stake her. However I can get her."

"Amen," Tara said quietly.

Dawn smiled at her.   "That says something coming from you, Miss Wicca."

Tara smirked.   "The sentiment's the same even if the deity isn't."   She sipped her cocoa.   "I need to finish painting your room."   They went to do that while the baby wandered around the living room by scooting on her little wheeled cart.

Buck watched her.   "Doesn't want to crawl?"

"I think she's waiting for everyone to be here again.   She likes to rock back and forth to make the little platform go."   He shrugged.   "She's my kid so she's a bit odd.   I didn't expect anything else to happen."   He called Wes's cellphone.   "Where are you?   Home.   Dawn and Tara are painting.   Izzy's scooting around.   Someone told the ATF I had those so they want to peek."   He nodded.   "Basically.   They already know, Wes.   They're the same guys who've been going over the minefield.   Sure, we're here.   How much longer?"   He nodded.   "That'll work.   Thanks, man."   He hung up.   "Two hours.   He's at the off- ramp from the interstate."

"That's fine," Buck agreed.   "Shouldn't take us too long to confiscate something.   How would you take on that demon?"

"Burning it from the inside out.   So either a laser or something that'll explode and ignite thermite in their chest."   He took a sip.

Buck nodded.   "Know anything like that?"

"I do, yeah.   I only have one though."   Buck gave him a look.   "Only if you're really nice, Buck."

"We could've busted you on suspicion of having artillery."

"Fine."   He went outside, going to the secure area.   He pulled up the spike then opened the door, ducking in so he could close it again.   He held it down when he heard the snow crunching outside.   When it went on he walked over to find the case he wanted, looking over as the door opened.   "What?"

"More boxes of books?" Chris asked, closing the door to keep the heat in.

"Something like that.   You mind?"

"A lot.   You scare me."

Xander smiled.   "You say some of the sweetest things but I don't think I could hit on you, Chris.   You're my type but I'd almost rather have a hunter who understands what I've seen."   He turned back around at the horrified look on his face.   "Not like everyone knows what it's like to stand there and stake someone in the heart.   It's a bit more personal than shooting them."

"I'd guess it was.   Probably like stabbing them would be."   Xander looked up and nodded.   "So you like the Winchester boys?"

"They're good friends but if I went gay, they're still straight."   He found the one he wanted and pulled it out.

"Illusions?" he demanded.

"Yuppers.   Because you're a nosy SOB.   Must come with the job," he said dryly, handing it to him.   "I need one more thing and that's for Buck."   He moved back to the back case, finding what he wanted in there.   He bounced it in his hand to make sure it was full.   "Crap, I thought I had a full one."   He searched, but nope.   He sighed, settling in to fill that one.

"You're...filling a grenade?"

"The demon about to attack Denver needs to be burned at a high temperature as close to from the inside out as possible.   Buck needs it to take it out before it eats your courthouse for having one of its spawn on trial."

"How do you know that?"

"Newspaper."

"Oh."   He watched him.   He had a good hand.   "Thermite?"

"Yup.   Hottest burning thing I know."   He finished and put in the detonator cap then wired it shut.   He weighed it, staring at it.   "I know I forgot a step."

"Tamping material?" Chris asked.

"No.   Ignition source," he moaned, opening it to lay that in too.   He had to empty it and start over again but that was fine.   Then he reclosed it and handed it over carefully.   "There.   That'll fire that."   He looked at him.   "Welcome."

"What's in the other room of books?"

"I think those are actual books."   Chris gave him a look.   "Really.   Half the research books are in Latin, Chris.   Not like I have a library upstairs.  Well, I have a library room but nothing unpacked in it yet."  He gave him a look, taking the launcher from him.   "C'mon."   He led him out, replanting the stake in the hole once they were out and the door was closed.   They walked out to the truck, letting Chris put the things where they should go.   "Cushion that better."   Chris took off his sweater to do that so it was fine in the tool compartment of his truck.   Then they went back inside to get more warm drinks.   "It's in his truck."

"Thanks, kid."

"Welcome.   Hate to see it if it got on the news."

"He filled the launchable grenade in front of me," Chris said.

"Of course he can," Dawn agreed from the kitchen.   "He made most of our higher weapons in Sunnydale.   Buffy didn't like guns."   She looked at him.   "All sorts of stink grenades and things to clear nests."

"That's a different version of our light and heat one that I used to use on nests," Xander agreed.   "Don Epps saw that one at work.   He's in the LA FBI office."

"I'll tell him you said hi," Chris said.   He looked at Buck, who shrugged. "How many armorers are there in the hunting community?"

"No clue," Xander admitted.   "My only weapons contact is Caleb.   Most of what I need I can find in a nest or make it.   Except that one time back in Sunnydale when we needed something in a mall."

"No, Xander," Dawn ordered.   "That's probably going to get you in trouble."

"Good point."

Chris looked at her then at him.   "Would I be horrified?"

"Caleb was."   He smiled as he took a drink.   "He didn't think it was possible either until I showed him how.   It wouldn't be your agency's job though."

"Yeah, I definitely don't want to hear that one," Buck decided.   "Hold on, in a mall?"   Xander nodded.   "Blue thing?"   Xander nodded again.   "I saw that episode."

Xander smiled.   "It was a decent enough double date.   Me and Cordy went with another couple since one of them had a car."

Buck shuddered.   "Thank you for getting that for her."

"Not an issue.   Dawn, are you making food?"

"I can."   She got to work on that for them.   They were hungry, hard working guys.   They needed good sandwiches.   Then she brought Tara one and took the baby with them so she wouldn't be infected by the weapons talk going on.   Izzy wiggled her way out again.   "Fine, don't cuddle us," Dawn called after her.   "Xander, incoming."

"I hear her.   C'mon, Izzy.   Daddy's got lunch meat."   She cooed, wiggling as fast as the board would let her go.   Chris picked her up and handed her over, getting a smile for it.   "That's a good girl to smile at him for his help."   He handed her some of the lunch meat, letting her suck on it until it dissolved in her mouth.

"You're insane, kid," Buck said.

"It comes from hunting and Sunnydale both."   He gave him a bland look.   "I could be more insane but then I'd have to be a girl."

"Probably true," Buck decided, eating his sandwich.   He looked down when it wiggled.   "Tara, I wasn't being mean.   Please don't put goldfish in my food?" he called.   He plucked it out.   Chris checked his but it was still normal.

"Wrong witch," Dawn called.   "Plenty of us are mean, not insane, thank you."

"I didn't mean it that way," he called, checking before taking another bite.   He didn't want to eat a goldfish ever again.

Xander leaned closer.   "Just think, I got to hunt with her sister and Willow for *years*."

Buck patted him on the back.   "There's retraining programs so you can find a more normal life," he offered.   "That way you don't think clothes thoughts."

"I heard that," Tara called.

Buck sighed.   "He said it."   His food changed back and Xander went back to eating.   "Don't pick on me.   I'm the nice one."

"Wouldn't hit on you either, Buck.   You don't love my weapons like I do."

Chris moaned, shaking his head but stuffing his mouth before he could suggest something.

Buck, well, he was in a picking mood.   "You could try for Ezra but I think he's straight."

"He's a nice guy and I think he could understand hunting pretty well but I don't take him as settling here in the middle of nowhere or watching me hunt.   Maybe you should take that advice?"   Buck blushed, shaking his head.   "He'd suit you pretty well and you're already close."

"Too fancy for my tastes and too male, Xander."   His phone beeped with a text message, making him look at it.   "I forgot we planted that here."   Xander pointed at the bug.   "I remember now."   He took it off and put it into his pocket.

"I took the one in my room out already.   I didn't think you needed to hear me have naughty dreams."

"No, not really," Chris agreed. "The person who transcribes it for us enjoyed it though."

"Happy for her then," Xander quipped back.   "I'm known for pleasing my ladies."

"Before or after they try to kill you?" Dawn called.

"Before.   I tend to walk away afterward."

"Then explain Cordy and Anya?"

"I didn't please either of them once they were unhappy with me."

Chris groaned.   "Please?" he begged.   They changed the subject for him.   This kid was going to drive him insane.   Maybe they should just set off the rest of the mines?   Be done with it?   When the truck got there he nearly ran outside to see what it had so he could get some sanity back.

***

Dean pulled up in front of the house, looking at it.   Sammy was off with his dad and Bobby doing something mystical; Dean wanted a cuddle.   He got out and snuck into the baby's room, picking her up to cuddle.   "Hey, princess."   She blinked at him then snuggled in to go back to sleep on his shoulder.   He sat in the rocking chair.

Xander walked in a few minutes later.   "What's wrong?   Someone die?"

"Sammy's off doing mystical crap with Dad.   I was feeling a bit bummed, I'm between hunts, so I came to check on her."

"You never have to sneak in, Dean."   He grinned.   "She's good at that."   He left, going back to his own room.   Dean knew where the beds were in the house.   He laid down, listening to Dean move around Izzy's room.   She was being a comforting thing so it was good to him.   He heard Dean put her down and head for his usual room and Dawn squeak.

"Sorry, Dawn.   Didn't know you were here."   He went to the other guest room instead.   She was cute in those jammies but way too young.   He stripped and stretched out, getting comfortable.   Izzy made unhappy noises and since he was up he was the first one back there.   Xander came in a minute later with a warm cloth.   "Diaper rash?"

"Big time.   She put snow down it and it got way too wet before we realized.   Then the rash popped out the next day."   He took her to change, cleaning her wet butt off with the warm, soothing cloth before putting on the cream and new diaper.   "There.   How's that?"  She smiled and waved at him.   "Hi, Izzy.   Ready to go back to sleep?"   Dean picked her up to rock her some more.   "Sure, you can do that."   He threw the washcloth into the hamper in there, then went to wash his hand and go back to bed.

Dean looked at her.   "You are so spoiled, Izzy."   She snuggled into his neck, liking how he smelled.   "Want to go back to bed?"   She nuzzled him.   "No, that's not a bottle."   He tried to put her down but she fussed so he took her to bed with him.   He was tired, she'd be fine.   He had slept with Sammy plenty of times over the years.   She snuggled into his chest, getting comfortable with her favorite uncle.   "Night, sweetheart."

"Baba?"

"No, no baba.   Not right now."   She pouted.   He stared down at her.   "In the morning.   It's not early yet.   Wait until it's bright."   He held her better and she drifted off against his chest.   Dean let himself sleep too.   It was a good night for it.

***

Xander walked out to the kitchen, handing Tara his keys and some money.   "Go do girl stuff."   She pouted.   "I haven't gotten to hold my daughter in days.   Take Dawn and do girl stuff, Tara."   She sulked all the way out to the truck with Dawn in tow.   "Dean, want breakfast?" he called.   No answer so he went to check on him.   He got the camera and snuck back, taking pictures of her sucking on her uncle.   "Hey, Dean, don't flinch," he called.   Dean did flinch a bit but she batted at him, going back to her sleep sucking.

Dean looked down, smiling.   "Does my chest taste good, Izzy?   Those don't work that way."   He pried her off, making her fuss.   "Quit.   It's time for food."

"I think she knew what she wanted," Xander teased with a grin.   "It's clear she'll be het and very picky."

"Of course.   Only the best for my niece."   He got up, handing her over.   "Let me put on a shirt."   Xander walked off with her.   He spotted the camera. "Please don't show Sammy, Xander?"

"I'm not.   It'll go into her photo album."

Dean groaned but got dressed, heading out to breakfast.   "Where's the ladies?"

"I handed Tara two hundred and told them to go do girl things.   I hadn't gotten to hold her in days."

Dean laughed.   "Good to know."   He settled in to watch him cook.   Izzy was doing the same.   "You don't mind?"

"No.   I don't mind," he assured him quietly.   "Sometimes you have to relax from the hunt."

"Thanks, dude."

"Not a problem.   You're her most favorite uncle."   He looked back at him.   "Did you feel her doing that?"

"Nope.   Not a bit.   Not even a dream of someone sucking on me.   Sammy did it once but he was a few months old."

"She's a special girl," Xander teased, kissing her on the head.

"In that very special way," Dean agreed dryly.   "It's good that she'll have such great taste."

"We'll have to find her someone who smells like you."

"I don't stink."

"I meant your natural scent, Dean.   She sniffed someone in the grocery store because he had on the same aftershave."

"Did you sniff too?" he joked.

"No.   I could smell it."

"Hyena senses?"

"Since the birth they've been pretty open."   He popped out the toast and handed over a plate.   "Hers."   Dean settled in to feed her while Xander made them breakfast.   "We need to get her some new clothes.   She's nearly outgrown everything."

"Bobby's getting her clothes for her birthday."

Xander called him.   "Izzy's in a growth spurt," he said in greeting.   "Dean said you were getting her clothes for her birthday.   She's already in eighteen month clothes and moving up from there, Bobby.   That way you know what to get her."   He smiled.   "That's fine.   No, I sent the girls off so I could have my own daughter for a while.   Dawn had a lot of fun picking on Buck.   Sure, I'll have her call."   He hung up and called Dawn's cellphone.   "Have Tara call Bobby.   He needs witchly advice."   He hung up and got back to frying eggs.   Izzy was humming in between bites.

"She's definitely hoovering this stuff down."

"Yeah, she does that now and then."   He came over with their plates once the toast was out, settling in once he had some milk.   Dean smiled at that touch.   "It helps.   We need strong bones as much as she does."

"I definitely do.   I hit way too many walls thanks to things throwing me."

"I hit gravestones all too often."

Dean nodded.   "I can understand that."   He fed her the last bite, then dug into his own.   She made begging noises so some of his went to her too.   It made her a happy baby.   He grinned and went back to shoveling food in.   "What still needs done around here?" he asked through the food.

"Not a lot, but don't teach her to do that.   Tara will swat her."    Dean shrugged a bit, looking sheepish.   "Not like I care, Dean.   I was raised by animals.   I don't care if you're talking out your butt while licking your ears."   Dean grimaced, shaking his head quickly to clear that image.   "I don't but she will."

"I can work on her manners.   I did most of Sammy's home training."

"Sure, if you want.   I think she'll mostly do okay."   His daughter reached for his toast so he tore off a piece for her, letting her happily gum it to death with her two teeth.   "We think she's been waiting to crawl until you guys were here."

"Could be.   She knows who spoils her the most beyond Tara."   He nibbled a bite.   "Why is Dawn here?"

"LA's going to have issues.   They wanted her safer."

"Again?

"Yup."   Dean groaned, texting that to his father and Ellen.   He put his phone up.   "Your dad?"

"And Ellen.   A lot of hunters go there between jobs to talk and compare stories."   Xander nodded at that.   "So, what're we doing for her birthday?"

"The usual stuff.   If no one can get here, we'll do her official party when they do get here.   We're supposed to be snowed in soon.   But I did get a pickup like you suggested."

"I saw.   It was shiny."

"It's new and I had them put a lift kit on it."

"Like in the rap videos?" Dean asked, looking confused.   "You flip a switch and it goes up?"

"Yup.   That'll lift it another six inches if we need it to go up.   It's got air bladders so it won't short out in the snow."

"Huh," Dean said, nodding some.   "Interesting idea."   He went back to eating, letting Izzy steal a piece of his toast too.   She beamed and nibbled, babbling at them about the toast.   "She's really mouthy today."

"She's having a happy day.   Her favorite auntie here with Dawn, who she's liking a lot for helping her pick out her clothes.   You're here.   She probably thinks Sam's hiding from her and you're going to make him show up."

"He'll be here in a week or so," Dean told her.   "Yeah, your daddy will be fine."

Xander smiled.   "She was so good when we got snowed in with Buck and Chris for a few days.   They even agreed with me that the old timers had so many kids because they had nothing else to do all night."

"And no birth control."

"There was a form of condoms around but they weren't that popular."

"Really?"

"Yeah.   They had condoms back in Ancient Egypt made from sheep and goat intestines."

"Eww."

"Like the lambskin ones, Dean."

"Still gross."

"They feel nice.   Anya liked them."

"Heard from her?"

"She showed up with Hallie when she got her powers back because she now had a conscience and didn't want to hurt people anymore."

"She back to being human?"

"She's on probation but she'll be fine."   He smiled slightly.   "She's a tough girl.   She worked for and schemed her way into what she wanted."   Dean nodded, stuffing some eggs into his mouth.   At least until Izzy squealed in outrage and threw some wet toast at him.   "Yes, dear?" he asked dryly.   "Problems?"

"Here," Dean said, feeding her a bite of egg.

"Baba?" she asked.

Xander got up to make her one of juice handing it over.   "All you had to do was ask."

She leaned over to suck on his cheek then went back to her bottle.   "She's going to have more personality than most girls," Dean said.   He fed her another bite of egg when she made begging noises with her mouth open.   She smiled and went back to her bottle of juice.   She smashed the rest of her wet toast in her fingers.   "Will she need a bath?"

Xander looked then shrugged.   "A washcloth should do.   There's one on the faucet."   Dean got up to get it and put her on the floor so they could finish eating without help.   She patted Dean's leg until he handed over another piece of toast.   She wiggled onto her stomach and then wiggled her way to her platform.   She wiggled and rocked her way to the window.

"She should be crawling."

"She will be soon, Dean.   She's mobile very well.   She scoots around on her board all the time.   I think she's waiting to show off for Sammy and you."

He looked then grinned.   "Well, I'm here."

"Then give her incentive."   He grinned back.   "Tease her until she crawls or walks over to beat you for it.

"I can try that later.   What's with the little baby roller platform?"

"Buck suggested it when she kept trying to move but never made it.   He said Chris's son had one before he died.   It was like a pre-walker."

"Not a bad idea."

"Did they get the thing in Denver?"

"Yeah.   It was on the news.    Their boss is probably not happy.   I heard the boys all got drunk that night thanks to it.   What were they using?"

"A grenade launcher.   I modified the grenade to blow thermite so it could be burned quickly."   Dean gaped.   He smirked back.   "They were here to check out the stuff I found in LA that Angel said he wanted out of his city."

"Anything good?"

"Quite a bit.   They only took the artillery, not the swords or that stuff, or the gems or money."   Dean gaped.   He gave him a smug look.   "A few were doing some very bad deals.   Angel was happy to have them gone.   Fred wanted some babysitting time to see if she wanted to be a mom someday.   Dawn had to pack.   Buffy was bored.   So it went and Wesley got to groan all he wanted."

Dean shook his head.   "You're an insane nest raider, Xander."

"I know.   But I like it."

"Need help with your inventory?"

"Nah, nothing else to do around here."

Dean smirked.   "You need the tv on."

"Yeah, I know.   He can't get up here to dig the post hole."

"The dish can hang on the house."

"He said it can't."

"Uh-huh.   We'll talk to someone else.   One of the official companies."

Xander shrugged. "He has my deposit but hasn't cashed it yet."

"You sure?"

"It's in my bank account.   It hasn't been cashed yet."

"Good.   Then he's honest."

"Yeah.   He's scared Kyle's haunting up here too."

"Fear of Kyle is a good, reasonable thing.   He was seriously one of the scarier hunters I've ever met.   He scared me all the time because I kept wanting to dive into the well to see what he had down there.   He'd sneak up behind me and scare the living shit outta me."

Xander grinned.   "I feel that way about Spike."   Dean cackled.   "I do.   That's why I tied him up when I had to have him as my roomie."

"I understand that.   Even chipped it didn't make him totally helpless or unable to plan."

"Willow had a guilty conscience about that."

"Yay her."   He looked out there, watching her watch the snow fall.   "We need to turn one of the storage areas into a garage."

"We can do that."   He and Dean got up, Dean grabbing the baby so she wouldn't be upstairs alone.   It was a bit chilly so they all put on sweaters and shoes, but the clearing of the garage went well enough.   Dean got to pull his baby in there by lunchtime.   By then, the girls were back and had done a lot of baby shopping for him.   "We could've done that," Xander told Dawn.

"We checked with Bobby so we didn't duplicate."   She picked up Izzy to dance around with, making her giggle.   "What did you do today?"

"Cleaned out a space for Dean's baby," Xander said, taking her back.   His daughter smiled at him.   "I know she loves you but you're my girl and not hers."   He looked at her.   "Go grocery shopping since you won't let me cook anymore?"   She sighed but gathered Tara since Dawn didn't drive.   Xander handed over more money.   They hiked off to the pickup in the snow.

"Be careful out there," Dean called after them.

"They used the money this morning to go baby shopping so I sent them for groceries.   That way they can do girl things without male input or getting in the way."

"It's fine with me.   Estrogen is fun to be around but you're nearly smothered in it."

Xander gave him an insane grin.   "When has it been different?"

"Maybe I'll get stranded here for a few weeks so you remember guy stuff.   Before you start to interior decorate or something."

"Who do you think decorated this place?   Tara only painted, Dean."

"I'm sorry, dude," he said, patting him on the shoulder.   "If I had known, I would've shown up sooner with wings and beers."

"Not so big on the beers, but wings are nice."

Dean called Dawn's phone.   "Pick us up some guy food so we can do guy things without you girls doing girl things around us to pollute our manliness, Dawn.   Wings, that stuff.   That's fine.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "Tara's not twenty-one?"

"Um, nineteen?   Almost twenty I think."

"That explains that."   He swung the girl around, making her cackle and babble at him.   "That's my niece."   He put her down, letting her get comfortable.    "Now, we should do something nice, huh?"

"If you're going to tempt her into crawling, set up the video camera.   Your dad wanted it."

"I can do that."   He went to grab it and set it up, then sat down while Xander checked the view.   Then Xander came to sit beside him.   Dean held up the teddybear he had gotten at the same time.   "Want your Tarabear, Izzy?"   She looked at him, then reached out for it.   "You gotta crawl, niece.   You can crawl if you can use that strange walker without a seat."  He waved it.   She pouted.   Xander waved her bottle, and she made begging noises.   Dean put them together.   "Come get 'em, Isabelle.   You can do it.   Most girls are very good crawlers."

"Eww, mental image I did not need," Xander muttered.

Dean looked at him oddly.   "Stripper floor show?"

"Yeah."   He shook his head quickly.   "I need to date again."

"Yup," Dean agreed.   "You do."   He looked at the baby, who had wiggled closer.   Xander got up to put her into the right position and show her how it went then they scooted back a few inches.   Izzy scowled but tried what the daddy had showed her.   She tried really hard and crashed on her chin, making her cry.   Dean stopped Xander from going to her.   "C'mere, you can have all the love you want, Izzy.   You know that.   Your daddy Sammy will like it if you crawl.   He'll see it."   She stared at him. "C'mere," he ordered, patting his lap.   She scowled again and got back up, crawling forward to take her rightful lap spot with her baba and Tarabear.   She huffed as she crawled into her uncle's lap, giving him a dirty look as she got what she wanted.

Xander leaned down to hug her.   "I'm so proud!" he cooed, kissing her on the head.

She looked at him then gave him a shove.   "No!"

He laughed.   "That's a new word."   He kissed her on the head again.   She gave him another shove then snuggled into her uncle's lap.   He was mean to her but not that mushy.

Dean looked down at her.   Then he gave her a hug before putting her down and moving away again.   Xander checked the viewfinder then sat beside him.   "C'mere and you can cuddle some more."   He patted his lap.

Xander found a book, waving it.   "Want a story?"

"That definitely worked on Sammy.   He used to like to try to hide inside and under things.  Books brought him into the open all the time."   He patted his lap again.   "C'mon, princess."   She huffed but crawled to them.   She stared at them so Xander settled in to read to her.   Dean turned off the tape after the story was done, putting her onto the couch.  "Pretty soon you'll be walking and then you'll be a real holy terror."

Xander looked at him.   "Don't remind me.   I think that's why some parents intentionally handicap their kids, so they can't become holy terrors."   Dean cackled, shaking his head.   "You sure?"

"Yeah, they're just sick."   He looked at the camera then at Xander.   "Still got DSL?"   He nodded so Dean got up to plug the camera into the laptop he had stolen from Sammy so he could send it to Bobby's computer.   They'd like that one.   It went with a note reminding them of the baby's birthday.   Plus that if they couldn't get there they'd throw a party for her when they could.   He looked outside.   "It's getting nasty."

"Tara drove during the last white out.   They'll be fine and take it really slowly.   And hey, now they can be followed around too."   He got up and went to the bathroom, looking down when he heard a noise.   "Hi, Izzy.   Coming to help in the bathroom?   Some day you'll do this too."   He peed then shooed her out while he flushed and washed his hands.    He followed her out.   "She's very helpful."

"I'll remember to close the door," Dean said.   "You let her watch?"

"Not like she'll understand and maybe it'll make her want to potty train sooner.   Then no more diapers."

"I could like that," Dean agreed.   He got back a message from Ellen, who had gotten the video forwarded from Bobby's computer.   "Ellen said we were mean to her but it was a good job.   Jo didn't crawl for another two months."

"That's fine.   I think I crawled earlier."   He shrugged.   "She'll do it when she does.   The doctor said she's on target."

"Good."   He smiled at the cuddly girl.   "You tired again?   Are you sure you're not sick?"

"She's having a growth spurt and it's time for her morning nap."

"Ah.   I love schedules sometimes.   So now what?"

"Now, we find something to do so we don't go nuts."

Dean looked up something, hooking the computer up with a program that let him watch tv on it.   He handed it over.   Xander leaned over to kiss him for it then decided to watch an episode he hadn't seen of a show he liked.

Dean shook his head.   "Silly bitch," he muttered.

"Been called worse by Willow."

"I figure you have," Dean agreed dryly.   "How is she?"

"She and Faith have been talking about life rehab and how it's going."   He looked over.   "She's pouting because Tara's here."

"Figures.   Any idea if she'll try it again?"

"She said there's no other realm that could be merged."   Dean nodded once at that.   "So we're good.   Unless she decides to do it to me the normal way."   His phone rang.   "What's up?"   He listened.   "That's fine, Dawn.   We know it's coming down.   Take it slowly and inch here with the hazard lights on."

Dean got up.   "C'mon, we'll head out to rescue them."   Xander pointed at the baby.   "Ah...."   He grimaced.   "Damn."

"Yeah.   They're on the road here.   They just turned off the main road."

"Then they've only got two miles," Dean agreed.   "Inch along on the middle of the road."   Xander repeated that.   "Go as slowly as you want with your hazards on."   Xander told her that.   "I'll meet them at the gate."   He put on his coat and boots to go meet them.   It'd take them nearly an hour but that was being cautious.   "Sorry, if we had realized it was that bad, we would've went with you two."

"It's all right," Tara said calmly.   "I was giving Dawn a driving lesson."

"That's not a bad idea.   We can up those skills once it's clearer out."   He drove them to the garage and backed the tailgate inside, letting them unload from the warmth in there.   Then he parked the truck in the sheltered side of the building and closed the garage door again.   He jogged inside, getting a mug of coffee and a hug from Dawn, and then a hug around the ankle from his girl.   "That's my princess," he said with a grin.   "See, you like being more mobile than that platform thingy.   Huh?"

Dawn looked down.   "You're finally crawling?"

"Yes she is," Xander agreed.   "She got the point earlier.   She was also very curious about the bathroom."   Tara snickered but picked her up to hug her.   "You two go do girl things here.   Do your hair and stuff."   They sighed but gave him the baby and went to do that.   He looked at Dean, who could only smirk.   "C'mon, sweetie.   We'll go watch some Deal or No Deal."   He took her to the couch so they could watch the laptop together.   "New mail."  He opened it and snorted.   "Sam said we're both evilly mean to her."

"Sammy can kiss my ass," Dean said.

Xander let him type out that message to him. Then he took it back to go back to his show with her.

***

Sam snorted at the retort he got.   "Dean said he's not mean, he was tempting her to finally crawl because she was waiting to show off for us."

"He probably was," John agreed patiently.   "He got you to crawl for a story."   He patted his younger son on the head.   "How's the weather there?"

Sam checked.   "It's a good idea to have a pickup.   Dean's probably stored the Impala in a garage.   It's a near blizzard."

John groaned.   "I don't want to miss her birthday."

"We can make it tomorrow," Bobby said patiently.   "Tara just got back from getting groceries.   She said the road's passable but scary."

"That's fine," John agreed.   "We can probably make it in the pickups."   Bobby nodded.   Sam looked at him.   "You're going to miss your daughter's first birthday?"

"Not if humanly possible.   I was going to see if Willow could magic me there if I had to."

"We should be able to drive it tomorrow but we've got to bring some supplies.   The girls are good but probably not planning for a good snowed in time," John said.   He looked at Bobby.   "Coming?"

"Only if I can get back out.   I can't leave this place closed all winter.   Even I've got to eat."

"I know that.   If not, we'll take plenty of pictures and you can spoil her the next time you see her," Sam promised with a grin.   "She'll expect it.   Dawn's been teaching her how to be a demanding girl according to Dean."

"All girls are demanding somehow," John said wisely.   "Even your mother."   Sam rolled his eyes.   "Jess wasn't?"

"Not often."

"That's good; maybe we can warp the little one closer to that," Bobby said.   He didn't know how she wasn't since his wife had been a demanding, nagging one.

"Dawn said she's got to go home sometime.   Unfortunately her mother has a date tonight so Dawn's pouting and the thing in LA is about to go down soon."

"Take your joy when you can.   She's not a hunter but she knows enough to live by the creedo," Bobby said.   He went to get himself some coffee.   "Anyone want something warm?"

"Please," Sam said, getting up to get it himself.

John sent an email to Ellen, getting back a reminder of when Isabelle should be doing some normal things.   She'd be walking soon and driving them all nuts.

***

Dawn watched the newscast from LA, tipping her head to the side.   "Too bad it was during the day so the vamps couldn't help."

"They got the tail that was still underground," he said, pointing at it.   She nodded, leaning on his shoulder as they watched the laptop's screen.   "At least it wasn't going to finish eating the city."   She hummed but nodded.   Izzy crawled out so she pulled her into her lap.   "Look, Izzy, it's the auntie and the uncle fighting the huge scary monster."   Izzy stared then scowled at it, beating at the image.   He smiled.   "That's right.   It was bad."

"Clearly since it made the news," Dean agreed.   His phone rang.   "Yeah?"   He listened then snickered.   "I'm so sorry, Buck.   Want some tranquilizers?   I think Xander has some darts still."   He cackled.   "Sure, send Sammy up once he can drive, man.   Thanks for the head's up.   Bobby with them?"   He nodded, still smirking.   "Go ahead and taunt him.   Send him to Ellen when he gets too cranky.   Have fun with that, Buck."   He hung up.   "Dad and Sammy had a small crash outside Denver.   Sammy's fine.   Had a small concussion and a few bruises from the seatbelt."   He took a sip of his cocoa -- they were out of coffee.   "Dad has a broken leg in two places.   He's in a thigh to ankle cast on his right leg so he can't drive."

"He'll grump us to death," Xander complained.

"He can't get up here anyway.   Buck's going to put up with him for a few days then send him to Ellen when he gets too cranky."   He shook his head.   "Sammy will be up later tonight.   He can drive.   He's just sore."

"John'll be okay, right?" Dawn asked, giving the baby a squeeze.

"The last time he complained so much Sammy called him whiny."   He walked off smiling to tell Tara that.   She'd want to fuss over them so she could go do that magically.

Xander and Dawn shared a look.   "If you ever get pregnant, don't let anyone give you the looks he gave me," he said quietly.

"I'd mood swing and kill them."   She gave him the baby and went to call her family to make sure they were all right.   Plus when she could come home because she was going to go insane soon with nothing to do out here.   She even mentioned that having Izzy here and nothing else to do was making her think about having one of her own.   Willow appeared to grab her and her bag.   Xander waved.   Tara gave her a hug.   Izzy scowled at Willow for taking her playmate, but Willow still took her and Tara off.   Dawn grinned when they landed.   "Cable tv and things to do," she said in relief, getting a swat from Tara.   "Even you've been going insane, Tara."

She nodded.   "I have."   Buffy gave her an odd look.   "No cable.   Only Izzy, painting, and Xander or Dean."

Buffy nodded once.   "No wonder you were so bored you were thinking about breeding.   I'm not to be an aunt for many years, Dawn."

"Whatever."   She went to put her stuff in her mom's car then hug her mother.   "How was your date?"

"Not bad.   It was a business dinner but it wasn't bad."

She snorted.   "Yeah, he takes you to a romantic restaurant for a business dinner, Mom.   Even I know that one."   She gave her another cuddle.   "Did you guys get film of Izzy crawling?"

"It's in Cordy's email," Tara said quietly.   Fred went to find it.   Cordelia came out of the kitchen.   "Hi."

"Hi.   Back to civilization?"

"For a few days.   Her birthday is in two days."

"I left my presents for her on my bed," Dawn told her.

Tara nodded.   "I'll make sure she gets them."   Fred squealed so she laughed.   "It's the only way she'd start.   Now she follows people everywhere."

"That's mean."

"They had to tempt her into it," Dawn told her mother.

"I had to do that to Buffy once or twice before she got the point too."   Buffy walked off rolling her eyes.   "It's not mean, it's practical, Fred."

She huffed.   "I'll have to show that to Faith when we go up to visit."   Tara smiled.   "She loves her niece."

"So do I but Xander wanted his own daughter for a while," Dawn told her.   "He kept trying to send us out to do girl things so he could have his daughter back the day of the blizzard.   Thankfully Dean's there so he's not going to go fully insane.   Dean even hooked up cable to his laptop so he can watch some shows."

Fred shuddered.   "I lived without tv."

"Yeah, but you were busy all day," Dawn pointed out.   "Xander isn't that busy all day long."

"He's going to go nuts," Cordelia decided.

"I nearly did," Dawn quipped.   Her mother swatted her but gave her a squeeze.   "Thanks, Mom."

"We'll save you from making me a grandmother anytime soon, dear."   Dawn grinned, showing her the pictures she had of Izzy on her camera.   They all cooed over the cuteness of the group's niece.

Gunn came down the stairs.   "Back again, Tara?   Hi, Dawn."

"Hi, Gunn.   We were going nuts up there with nothing to do but play with Izzy.   I nearly wanted to have one," Dawn told him.   She let him have the camera.   "Pictures?"

He looked at it.   "That's a nice spread."

"He's got ten acres," Dawn told him.   " Most of it now without mines.   Buck and Chris can't get the rest until this spring they said.   Too much snow."

Gunn shuddered, flipping through them.   "She's crawling?"

"We have video of it," Fred said cheerfully.    "They were evil and mean to tempt her.   What's with that platform?"

"She used to sit on it and rock back and forth so she could get to the window and stuff," Dawn told her.   "She basically slithered everywhere before they showed her how to crawl."  She grinned at Gunn.   "John and Sam had a small booboo accident.   John's got a broken leg near those ATF agents they know."

"That poor agent.   He's going to be insane," Fred said.   Dawn nodded, snickering some.   "Sam all right?"

"Small concussion.   They were coming up for the first birthday."

"I can see how that'd be an important event," Fred agreed.   Joyce nodded quickly.   "We need to send presents back with Tara."   The other ladies nodded and went to pick up something.   Willow got hold of Faith to see what she wanted to send so they could pick it up for her.   Then Willow and Tara got to talk and argue.   Willow wanted her witch back.   Badly.

***

Xander looked up as the door opened, smiling at the man standing there.   "Don't you dare let her escape to play in the snow in her jammies."   Sam went to grab his very determined daughter, bringing her back inside to cuddle.   She was squealing and pointing but letting him cuddle her.   "Good time, Sam."

"It stopped snowing," he admitted.   He shut the door and sat down with her, just cuddling.   "I missed you."

She looked at him.   "Meme?"

"Yes, I missed you."   He kissed her on the nose, getting a grin back.   "I saw you're crawling.   I'm so proud of you, Izzy."   She snuggled in to hug him back.

Xander grinned, going back to his show of the moment.   "The girls disappeared thanks to Willow.   Tara should be back sometime soon to either pack, if Willow demands she come back, or to bring presents for her birthday."

"She deserves great presents.   I've got mine, Dad's, and Bobby's in the car."   He grinned at her.   "What're you doing?"   She wiggled again so he quit holding her so tight.   She patted his shirt until he took off his outer shirt and hoodie, making her look up at him, then get under his t-shirt to make him laugh.   "What are you doing?" he said, looking down the neckhole.   He suddenly yelped and put her down as he stood up to tuck in his shirt.   "Dear, those don't work."

"Fair warning, she's been fascinated by nipples recently," Xander said dryly.   "Izzy, we're not going to feed you that way.   You can't have those."   She pouted.   "Go pout at Uncle Dean."   She fussed.   "Let me guess, he's napping?"   He looked at her.   "Go wake him up, it's his turn to make you a baba."   She got put onto the floor when she tried to slither down, crawling that way looking very determined.   "Sorry, Sam."   He grinned.   "She found them the night Dean got here."

"Did she get him?"

"He let her snuggle in with her that night and she woke up hungry."   Sam gaped.   He nodded.   "It was cute."   Dean yelped.   "Sam's here."

Dean came out carrying the baby.   "She's got your dirty mind, Sammy."

"She got under my shirt too, Dean."

"She was tugging on my boxer briefs to get me up.   Nearly pulled them off my ass.   For a second I thought it was an incubus."   He shook his head but made her a bottle since she was chanting for one.   She squealed in happiness like her auntie did, taking it to drink.   "There, go cuddle the daddy?"   She crawled out with it in her mouth to get her daddy to do the cuddling stuff again.   Which he did as soon as she got within range.   He looked around.   "Tara not back yet?"

"Not yet.   Gunn sent an email that the girls were shopping for birthday presents for Izzy."   He grinned.   "Dawn left hers on her bed?"   Dean went to look, coming out with one that was slightly damp on one corner.   "Ah, she does snoop.   Put them in the closet with mine, Dean."   He did that.   "Sammy said it quit snowing."

"Finally."   He looked at his niece.   "You good, niece?"   She beamed and waved.   "Yeah, hi.   No trying to get me naked.   You're not gonna be the easy sorta girl I like."

"I don't care if she's easy as long as she's careful and not a slut," Xander said patiently.   "A bit easy is fine though.   As long as she's enjoying it and being very careful not to catch anything, especially not a baby."

"Sorry, but I want my daughter to be the sort to not give out until she's sure she's sticking with her boyfriend for a very long time," Sam told him.   "That way she's a good girl."

"By then she'll be figuring out if she wants to hunt or not," Xander pointed out, looking at him.   "And sex gets looser every year, Sam."   Sam scowled. "Yeah, she may wait, but we can only give her our views on when sex is a good thing and when it's not.   It's up to her to interpret it.   So as long as she's not the town slut, I'm not going to be too unhappy.   Three different boys in the same week is bad."

"No.   Boyfriend and only boyfriend."

"When it's time, we'll tell her that," Dean said to break up the argument.   He looked at Xander.   "You waited."

"Willow drove off everyone I hit on if my geekiness didn't."

"Oh.   Sorry, dude."

"Not your fault.   I got plenty on my road trip."   He looked at Sam.   "If she were a boy would you say the same thing?"

"Yes."

"Then again he's a prude," Dean pointed out.   "I had to talk his first time into pouncing him."   He went to finish getting dressed, coming back out to put on his socks.   Izzy held up her feet.   "That's right, I put socks on you this morning," he agreed with a smile.   She smiled back and went back to her sucking.   "She's very smart."

"Yes she is," Xander agreed.

"How're we doing her vaccinations?" Sam asked.

"The few that people worry about have an alternative.   She got those instead," Xander told him.   "Just in case since the evidence isn't specific in either direction."   That got a nod.   "Those are considered safer and just as good for the reasons."

"Good," Sam decided, looking at her.   "You're a bit pudgy."

"She's at a good weight according to her doctor," Xander said patiently.   "Quit second-guessing me and him, Sam.   She's fine, healthy, and all that.   On target emotionally and physically.   If she wasn't, you would've heard."

"Sorry, Xander."   He nuzzled her hair.   "How about a hair cut?"

"Did that last week.   I saved you some since you're such a mushy girl," Dean said patiently.   He glanced at Xander.   "You put some in the baby book?"

"Yup."

Sam smiled.   "Then all we have to worry about is her first birthday.   What're we cooking?"

"Fish," Xander said.   "She likes it.   It makes less of a mess than spaghetti."

"She stole some of my fish sticks and kept trying to steal my whole plate," Dean agreed.   "So that, some bigger pasta, Xander?"   He shrugged but nodded.   "Then the cake and ice cream?"

"I need eggs to make the cake and some frosting.   Tara forgot to pick some up."

"If it stays clear tomorrow we can pick that up," Dean agreed.   "Your pickup should make it."

"The main road's mostly clear," Sam said.   "The one up here could use a plow."

"If I had a plow blade," Xander told him.   Sam smiled.   "I have a truck now.   It should work."   That got a nod.   "That means you can watch her tomorrow, Sam?"

"Of course."

"Good."   He went back to his tv show, rewinding it to where he had forgotten to pause.

Dean smiled when Sam gave him a funny look.   "I hooked him into one of those services where you can watch tv on your computer because he doesn't have a dish hooked up."

"Ah."

"He's going insane," Xander agreed.   "No sex, not a lot of work to do, no tv, only one radio station and it's a country one of modern country, which I don't like, and only Izzy to play with."

Sam nodded quickly at that.   "Sure, I can see why you're insane."

Xander gave him a smug look.   "I said going insane, Sam, not already there."   Dean snickered but Xander went back to his tv on his computer.   "I even got onto a conspiracy site and helped a few of them with some trajectory problems since theirs were wrong.   No way their target got shot from where they thought because the bullet was at the wrong angle."

"Buck called and said to keep you off them; you caught one group that was planning something," Dean told him.   "He had to explain you were bored and knew guns, and their whole team knew who you were.   You were just bored."

Xander looked at him.   "I figured one was a future problem since I hadn't heard of that noted figure before.   Since it looked like it was in a city I passed it onto the email they have to send things to the NYPD.   I figured it was probably there and if not, they could find out who it went to."   He grinned and went back to his watching.

"Yeah, Chris called and said to get you off the computer for the day.   That you needed to be grounded," Dean agreed.

Xander shrugged.   "Was I right?"

"Chicago actually and they warned someone up there.   Did you remember to tell them that the new mines are better and you got more of a deer this time?"   Xander paused the show to email that to them.   Then he went back to it.   Sam was giving them a very strange look.   "One of her cult tried to get in while they were up here.   We had to hold the rest of the stump closed while they sent for an ambulance.    Chris said it was paranoid, but reasonable, and he could only mine along the fence but they wanted a safe passage map."

"I only did the back of the fence and off to the right side by the river.   I did give Buck the map last time, right?"

"Yeah, you did."

"Good.   Plus they have the old one of the things that need to be cleared.   They were going to pull those this spring."   He looked at Dean.   "Did he own down to the river?"

"Yeah, but he decided to build his fence with a gate back there so he could go down to the river but it wouldn't be a weak defensive spot."

"Makes sense to me.   Especially with the water nymph down there that wanted to play when I was surveying."   He shrugged and went back to watching his show.

"Izzy won't get into those, right?" Sam asked.

"No.   They're only on when we turn on the security system here at the house," Dean assured him.   "When we're outside with her, we turn it off and have a keychain remote thing to turn them back on if we have to.   Buck's boss approved of the design since it was safer around her but kept the cult members away."

"I guess I can understand that.   What if someone harmless wants to fish at the river?"

"It's a lot easier to get to the river from up the road," Xander said with a point.   "That neighbor doesn't have anyone in the house and there's a shorter walk.   Plus most of the townspeople know that Kyle had mines on the grounds.   The Sheriff said so when I asked that question."   He shrugged.   "It'll be fine.   He has a safe passage map too and he knows to call.   And why we put the new ones out."

"Good.   I guess."   He shrugged.   As long as Xander didn't get thrown in jail.   His daughter was giving him godlike looks again so he was happy enough to sit and cuddle her.  "That's my girl, Izzy."

"She's been your girl for the last few days by having diapers nearly as bad as yours," Dean said dryly.   "Thanks for changing the next few, Sammy."

"I can do that."   He wasn't scared of diapers.   Not anymore.   "We really do need some noise around here."

"I talked to the satellite guy and he said he'd come out to put the dish on the sheltered side of the house on Monday, if the road was clear," Dean offered.   Xander gave him a hug.   "I know you're going insane.   So am I."   He looked at Sammy.   "You ready to get back on the road soon?"   Izzy pouted.   "Not right now, Izzy, but later on next week."

"It's been a nice vacation," Sam offered.   Dean nodded.   "But yeah, kinda.   Too long with Dad."

"I can see how that'd be bad, but you guys know you can be here as long as you want or need," Xander told them.   They grinned.   Then Izzy made a stinky butt and Sam sighed, taking her to change.   "Potty training is done how?" Xander asked Dean.

"She'll start to get curious.   She'll want to run around naked.   Then you encourage, bribe the hell outta her, and get her to the point where she can tell and control it at night."   Xander nodded.   "But there will be accidents.   Sam had one in the car and Dad nearly screamed at him.   It was his fault for not wanting to stop to give him a potty break but Dad wasn't really rational that day.  They do happen though."

"Okay.   I'll keep that in mind.   Almost everything is washable around here."   Dean grinned at that.   "Izzy makes a mess.   I'm realistic about that."

"Good."   He gave him a nudge on the leg.   "You'll be fine once we're gone."

"Maybe."

"The dish will be on then."

"We're due to have a hard winter.   I need to stock up."

"Yeah, you probably should," Dean agreed.   "We can do that tomorrow."   Xander nodded.   "And possibly find you some chains for the truck."

"I have those in the case under the back seat."

"Decent."   He went to check, finding Sammy teasing her belly.   "She's going to pee if you don't cover it," he warned.

"She already did.   That's why I'm teasing her."

"Xander's thinking ahead to potty training."

"Years yet," Sam said with a grin for him.   "By what I saw online."

"Two or three is normal," he agreed.   He came in to clean her up again, then handed her back to Sam.   "After you change clothes too.   Washer's in the basement."   He went back to the living room.   Izzy crawled after him to pounce his ankle, making him smile.   "Hey, princess."   He picked her up, tossing her lightly into the air.   "Happy today?   You'll be a year old in a few days.   Does that make you happy?"   She squealed and wiggled so he tossed her up again, catching her.   "There, how's that?"

"Don't let it shake her," Sam complained.

Dean looked at him.   "Dad did it to you and it didn't hurt you any."   He took her back to the kitchen to get something to nibble on then out to the living room.   She pouted at him so he handed it to Sammy, letting her wiggle over to get her snack from him.

Xander looked over.   "Is that the last of the sugar free pudding?"   Dean nodded.   "I'll have to start a list."   He moved to another screen and worked on that. "What else do we need?"   Dean got up to look, coming back with a short list.   Xander put his down on it and it was good.   Xander went back to his show.   Izzy fussed.   He looked over.   "What?   Want to cuddle?"   She snuggled into Sam's arms.   "So cuddle him."

"You're not playing with her."

"I'm waiting for him to put her in her snow gear," Xander said dryly.   Sam beamed and went to find it, coming out to put the wiggling one into her snowsuit.   Then they all went out to let her play in it.   Sam got down to play in the snow with her while Xander brought out coffee for them so they could help.

Dean nudged Sam, pointing.   "Deer."

Sam pulled Izzy up to point for her benefit.   "Look, it's a deer."   She cooed, waved, and squealed.   The deer's head lifted and looked around.   "No way is that a normal deer," Sam decided when it didn't run.

Xander looked.   "No, it's one of the forest spirits."   He waved.   "It's nearly her first birthday," he called.   "You know we won't be hurting you guys."   It came closer to sniff then her.   It stared at Izzy then turned and walked off.   "Watch out for around the fence," he called.

The deer looked back at him then snorted and walked off again into the trees.

Xander shrugged, settling next to her.   "It's good that the forest sprites like you, huh?" he asked her.   She threw snow at him.   "Thanks."   He threw a little bit back at her, earning an outraged squeal and her doing it again.   It turned into a baby snow fight but that was what made her happy.   She even got Dean a few times, making him scoop up some to toss back at her.   They let her win of course, because they wanted her to be happy.   Xander looked over as a brownie appeared.   "What's up?"

"You own here now?"

"I do.   I'm Xander.   This is my daughter Isabelle.   We call her Izzy.   These are Sam and Dean."

The brownie looked at them then at Xander.   "The last one did bad things."

"I only hunt things that're causing problems," he said bluntly.   "I used to live in Sunnydale."

The brownie stared.   "You worked with the blonde that babbled?"

Xander nodded.   "I did.   You might want to warn your kind I put up things to make the ground explode by the fences to keep those who want my daughter out."

"We saw and can feel."   He stared at her.   "She's cute."

Xander smiled.   "Thank you.   She'll be one in three days."

He laughed.   "That's a good age."   He looked more closely at her.   "Perfectly normal but you can feel the magic that went into making her."   Xander moved his shirt so the brownie could see the surgical scar.   "Ah.   No wonder."   He patted her on the foot, getting a happy smile back.   "She's adorable."

"We know.   Everyone says that," Dean agreed.   The brownie smiled.   "Are we causing you guys problems?"

"No, not in the least.    Though you might want to be careful.   There's another bad snow moving in."

"By tomorrow?" Xander asked.

He nodded.   "Probably by dusk."

"We're going to stock up tomorrow morning.   Should we leave you something?" Xander asked.   "I've never met one of your people before."

"We take care of ourselves."

"That's fine.   If you need something, come tell me.   Or if you hear an intruder out that way, please?"   The brownie nodded.   "Thank you.   Feel free to raid if you need food this winter.   I'll get some honey and some powdered milk so I can make up bowls."

"That'd be nice," he agreed.   He patted the baby's foot again.   "You be safe out here.   Without the road being plowed it'll be a bad ride tomorrow."

Xander nodded.   "I'm looking at getting a plow for the front of my truck."

"Good boy."   He smiled at Dean.   "Do be safe out here.   It gets lonely.   That's part of what drove the last one over the edge of reason."

"We're finding them noise before he goes nuts too or wants another baby," Sam promised with a grin.

Xander shuddered.   "Bad thought, Sam."

"Sorry, Xander."   He smiled at the brownie.   "We'll check back as often as we can on them since she's my daughter too."

The brownie nodded.   "Of course she is.   She smells like you."   He looked at her then at Xander.   "You don't mind sharing your forest with us?"

"As long as you're peaceful and don't bother or hurt my daughter, why would I?   I only hunt things like vampires, who hurt others."

"Not all do."

"I worked with Angel and Spike," he said dryly.   "If others aren't feeding either, they have nothing to fear from me."

"Good!"   He smiled and looked at the girl.   "She'll do normal things I think.   I can't see the soul of a hunter in her."

"I'd welcome her to become the most mundane person ever," Xander said, smiling at that information.   The brownie nodded and bowed then left.   "Wow," he said, looking at his daughter.   "He loved you too.   You just make everyone love you, Izzy."   She smiled and threw snow at him now that the strange creature was gone.   He laughed, doing it back.

***

to part 4

Xander found the local Sheriff in the grocery store the next morning.   "Morning, Sheriff Larry."

He spun then looked and groaned.   "We didn't plow your road, did we?"

"Nope."   He grinned.   "The truck got me out.   Though I do think there's another storm coming."

"Weather service said tomorrow."

"I ran into a natural creature in the woods that said tonight."

"I'll make plans for that and tell the town's plow crew to get your road.   Might get you last."

"That's fine.   If I have to I can hike her out to the main road if the truck can't get us out."

The Sheriff relaxed.   "That house is very secluded."

"Which is why I'm going nuts," Xander said, making him laugh.   "Dean set up the laptop so I can get tv on it.   The dish guy is due out soon to attach it to the house.   So maybe soon."   He looked around.   "Izzy's birthday is in a few days so we've got to do some stocking."

"They're pretty low around here since this is a small town.   'Bout an hour away is a more major town.   They have a Sam's Club."

Xander nodded.   "I'm heading there next."   That got a smile.   "Dean's picking up a chest freezer for me."

"I'll tell Bill to clear your road today for you, Xander.   She all right?"

"Her dad's in so he's changing diapers and ignoring her pout about not playing in the snow."   That got another chuckle.   "Is there just the one Sam's Club?   No place else to stock up?"

"Personally I'd hit the hardware store for light bulbs and that stuff.   Candles too in case you lose power."

"We have a generator and propane heat, plus a few fireplaces I've been doing wood for."   That got a nod.   "But no other areas?"

"You don't have pets, right?"

"Only Sam."

The Sheriff smiled.   "Just get more than what you think you need for a month or so.   We should be able to get you out of there sometime soon."

"Okay, I'll keep that in mind.   Thanks, Sheriff.   I don't mind being the last one dug out.   As long as I can get out now and then."

"Agreed, Xander.   Go shop.   We'll make sure it gets dug out today."   Xander nodded, bouncing off to do some local shopping.   He went to talk to the plow crew.   "Hey, Bill?"   He looked up from his smoking.   "We forgot to dig out the road to Kyle's old place.   Just saw Harris in town."

"Crap."

"He's planning on stocking up, doesn't mind getting done last, but he does have a daughter.   She'll be a year soon and he hinted she likes to sneak out to play in the snow."

"I can get to his now.   He doesn't mind if he's last?"

"No, not in the least.   He does have a truck now."

"Good of him.   Going to stock up a lot?"

"Oh, yeah.   Dean's getting him a chest freezer.   I told him where Sam's Club was."

"Even better.   Let me get that for him."   He went to get his plow for that road.   He knew the one boy drove a fancy classic car that couldn't handle a deep snow.

***

Xander came back from the last run, flopping down on the couch.   "It's starting to snow again."   Sam moaned but went to help unload stuff.

"Why did we buy barrels of flour and where did you find them?" Dean asked as he came in with the first load.

"In case we get snowed in for more than a month.   I have a cookbook that shows me how to turn it into bread."   He grinned.   "Survival supplies, Dean."

"Ah."   He went to get the others.   Xander finally came to help since he saw Izzy was in her crib complaining about not getting to help.   Dean gave him a look.   "Are you broke?"   He carried in another extra-large pack of diapers.

"Nearly.   I'm down to six thousand dollars of what we found."   Dean nodded at that.   "Did I forget lightbulbs?"

"They came in the last load," Sam said, hauling in another box of diapers.   "These are the wrong size, Xander."

"That's so she can grow, Sam."

Dean looked.   "I think it's smaller."

"No it's not.   The numbering on that brand is different."   They held it up.   Xander shrugged.   "I'll donate it somewhere if she can't use them."

They nodded, getting the stuff into the basement storage area next to the kitchen.   They finally collapsed on the couch.   Dean got a fire started and turned down the heat.   If they ran out of propane, there was not a lot of hope of getting a new truck back to the tank before spring.   They got Izzy out and they settled in to look over what they were going to cook for her birthday dinner.   Xander had gotten a lot more pizza, fish sticks, and other things as well as survival supplies.   They had enough food to last for at least a month plus the survival supplies.   And potatoes.   Xander had bought about two hundred pounds of potatoes.

Dean looked over.   "Did you get powdered milk and honey?"

"In the first load.   They're above the hot water heater."

"Okay."   He went back to what he was doing.   Izzy was being watched by Sam but she didn't like to get near the fireplace.   She didn't like the extra heat it was putting out.   She crawled back to help her Uncle Dean type on the laptop for a bit by patting the keys, cooing in his ear, and making him pay attention to her instead of the clicky thing that made noise.   Dean looked at Sam.   "Anything else happen today?"

"The dish guy got here but we don't have a tv."

"It's in Tara's room," Dean and Xander said.   Xander got up with a groan to get it, coming up to hook up the box that the guy left.   Finally it was on and ...it had a fuzzy picture.   Dean groaned, getting up.

"Let me," Sam said.   "I had one once."   He got up and put on a jacket and boots, going to lean out the attic window so he could adjust the dish.   "Yell when it's got a picture."

"Go back," Dean yelled.   The sound came on again.   "Little more.   Too much."   Sam was probably sighing but oh well.   "There," he shouted.   Sam locked it back down then came back down the stairs.   Izzy pouted that he was wearing outside gear but he took it off.   "Do we get all the channels, Xander?"

He checked but nodded.   "Is it sheltered?"

"Yeah," Sam agreed.   "He adjusted it to what he thought would work since the tv wasn't ready for him."   He sat down and Izzy crawled over to sit in his lap with a smug look.   "Sure, you can sit on me.   I don't mind."   She snuggled in so he handed her the teddybear from the cushion.    She snatched it to cuddle, falling asleep on his lap.   "Awww."

"You're a very mushy daddy," Dean told him.

Sam scowled at him.   "She needs it."

"She does but you're still mushy."

"Guys," Xander complained, turning it to food tv.   They both gave him an odd look.   "I need to be a better cook or she'll only ever eat stuffing and that level of food."

"Fine," Dean agreed.   He watched for a few minutes.   "She's happier than Dawn."   Xander snickered and changed it to something else.   "We got the whole package?"

"That way I could find something for at least noise," Xander agreed.   He grinned.   "I even got the adult package."

"You're the man," Dean said with a grin.

"Well, no girlfriend out here or strippers," he said dryly.   Sam groaned, getting up to take Izzy to her room to read to her so she'd go back to her nap.   Dean and Xander shrugged.   Sometimes they didn't understand Sam.   Xander tossed Dean the remote.   "I've been hogging it."

"Thanks, Xan."   He found something to watch, an action movie, and it was good.   "Will we run out of anything?   We got coffee, right?"

"Coffee, soda, cocoa mix.   All that stuff.   Unless you want tang, I didn't get any orange juice mix."

"Nah, I'm good.   What's those bags of logs in the freezer?"

"Frozen bread dough."

He nodded at that and it was okay.   "We have a pan?"

"Tara gave me a recipe where she thaws it, smooshes it out like pizza dough then she put meat and stuff in the center and folds it over the mess.   You bake it then you cut it into smaller pieces or nibble on it all night.   She did roasted veggies in hers."

"That doesn't sound too bad," Dean decided.   "What about when you want bread?"

"I got about seven loaves.   By the time we're out, we might be able to get out again.   They'll keep plowing the road for us."

"That's going to be good."   He looked out the door at the sound of an engine.   "Huh.   Who's that?"

Xander looked.   "The deputy."   He walked outside after grabbing Sam's jacket.   "What's up, Deputy?"

"Xander, we've got some guy that's escaped from the county jail.   We think he's heading out this way because his mom lives on the other side of these woods."

"I can flip off the mines if you want to search back that way.   Not a problem.   Or keep them off during the search."

"Please."   Xander reached in to turn them off.   "Thank you.   You set up?   I know you said were a lower California guy."

"I went to stock up today.   I should be okay for at least a month."

"Good.   Are you guys okay if he tries to show up here?"

Xander grinned, leaning on the railing.   "Deputy, I do the same thing that Kyle used to do, only I hunted in California and I only hunted things that were attacking people."   That got a gape.   "There's about seven shotguns around here and yes, the ATF team that came for the mines know."

"Okay then.   Your daughter?"

"She'll be taught gun safety as soon as she's old enough to understand more than 'don't touch that'."

"Good.   That's sensible I guess.   Does the Sheriff know?"

"I think you and the guy that plows are the only ones that didn't."

"Good to know I get to yell at the boss for not telling me."   Xander grinned.   "Are you as gun nut as he was?"

"I like weapons but I'm not rich enough to get all the stuff he had in the well."

"He did?"

"Yeah, he had an extra well space that had some money, a few pieces of artillery, and a few guns down there in waterproof wrapping."

The deputy shook his head quickly.   "I'm sure the ATF guys were amused."

"It let them be creative for a bit," Dean said as he joined them.   "Problems?"

"Escapee with a mom on the other side of the woods," Xander told him.   "So leave the mines off for now."

"Sure.   Let me get you the map."   He went to do that.   He brought it out.   "These are the ones they haven't removed from Kyle's old set.   These are ours that the ATF guys agreed on."   Xander tossed down a keychain remote.   "You sure?"

"Not like they're going to come up here to bust me.   I registered all my guns through Buck."

"Fine.   The guns?" Dean asked quietly.   Xander grinned back.   "Chris is still complaining about your storage areas."

"Yay him.   He doesn't need to know."

"Good point."   They looked at the Deputy again.   "Nothing bad like that around here, right?"

"No.   Kyle fixed most of it."   He gave him an odd look.   "She's sneaking out."

Xander turned to stop her from opening the door.   "Thanks."   He turned back.   "If you need to come out and search, call us to make sure they're off and all that.   We'll help if we can.   Not like I have a whole lot to do."

"Good point.   Thanks, Harris."   He got back into his car and headed back to town.   His boss gave him a look.   "Map, ATF approved, and off-switch?"   He took them to put into his drawer.   "They're off now.   Did you know he does what Kyle used to?"

"Yup, including collect weapons."

"He mentioned six or seven shotguns."   The sheriff showed him something he had saved on his computer.   The deputy moaned.   "Swords too?"

"Yup.   His town's so dangerous the military sent a hush team in to handle it until it slowed down.   He's here because he couldn't keep his daughter safe for a bit."

"Oh."   He considered it.   "So he's like that one Winchester guy that used to visit?"

"Winchester is the dad of those two boys with him and the baby's grandfather," he said quietly.   "Somehow one of the girls Harris knows knocked him up with that tall one's baby."   The deputy shuddered.   "Exactly.   That's where Izzy came from."

"The blonde one?"

"No, her girlfriend, the redhead."

"That makes more sense.   The blonde was too calm to do something so mean."   He looked at the search area.   "They said if we needed them we could ask."

"That's fine.   I'm sure all three can track fairly well with what they do for a living."   That got a nod.   "He have the dish up?"

"It was under the eave."

"Good.   Because Xander was looking a bit less than sane earlier.   He said a few weeks ago he didn't have anything to do."

"He did today too."   He shook his head quickly.   "He really gave birth?"

"He has a surgical scar."

"Good!"   He walked off to talk to the people on search.   "Harris gave us permission to tramp on his grounds but there's some danger," he told them.   "The ATF guys aren't done with the mines but they're off right now.   We have a map of safe areas."   That got a few nods.   "He said to call first to make sure they're off if we need to search out that way.   I know his fence ends shy of the river."

"Why does he have new mines?" one asked.

"Because that pervert tried to get his daughter and there's rumors of a cult to her," another said.   The deputy nodded.   "There is?"

"There is and a lot of them got arrested by the FBI when they tried to take over his old town to make it a shrine to her," the Sheriff said as he joined them.   "A few are up for parole in a few months."   That got some groans.   "The ATF saw the plans and watched him put them in.   They have a switch to turn them off if they need to get in there, which I don't think they will.   They seem to like him."   That got a few smiles.   "Any other questions?"

"This guy knows that it's easier to get to the river from up the road," the deputy said.   "He's local.   I'm sure he remembers Kyle.   There's not a local kid that'll step foot on his property after he shot the one girl on the butt with rock salt."

"I know but we have to cover it just in case."

"But he'll help?" one of them asked.

"Yeah, Harris said that he'd help us search if we needed him to."

"Good," one decided.   "We'll let him search his own and we'll stay outside his fence."

"He said they'd turn them off," the Sheriff said.

"So?"   She shrugged.   "Still safer."   That got a nod.   "He stock up?   I heard he was from southern California."

"He did today," the sheriff agreed.   "I made sure."

They all nodded.   He was a nice kid but a bit strange, though they all loved his daughter.   She was so cheerful.   It was cute how he taught her to babble like he did.

***

Xander got out of his truck a few days later, slamming the door.   Then he walked around to pull the guy out of the back of the truck and carried him inside to put him across the deputy's desk.   "Did you need him?   If not, I caught him sneaking in the gate by the river."   He looked at the guy.   "Aren't you stupid?"

The guy whimpered.   "Please, Sheriff?"

"Sure, kid.   Why were you on his lands?"

"I wanted to get close to his daughter."

"For?" Xander asked sweetly.

The guy's eyes turned black.   "Because she'll be ours," he growled.

Xander pulled something off his neck and dropped it on him, making him scream.   "It's blessed."   He grinned.   "Sam can do a really good exorcism if you need him to."   He walked off shaking his head and calling home.   "Hey, Dean, can you swat the supposed evil thing and tell him that guy had black eyes and wanted Izzy for that special reason?"   He hung up and went to get more bread.   The guys ate a hell of a lot more than he did.   He even got a bread pan since he had all those rolls of bread dough in the freezer.  He had found directions on one bag that didn't look too hard.

The Sheriff looked at the guy.   "What do I do with you?"   He called out there, finding it busy.   He tried again and got Dean.   "What do I do with this guy?   Xander left something on his chest that's making him scream."   He plucked it off.   The guy tried to move.   "Keep it up, he's coming back."   The guy went limp again.   "Please.   He said Sam could do a good one.   Thank you, Dean."   He hung up and shook his head quickly.   He didn't want to know.   Thirty minutes later Sam stomped in and up to the guy, hauling him up to take him somewhere to talk to him first.   The sheriff followed because he couldn't let him really hurt a guy in custody.   Sam even took the handcuffs back with him when the guy was back to normal and begging for mercy.   Yeah, those boys were insane.

***

Faith looked around the town, frowning some.   She looked at the guy who had brought her.   "Any idea where he is?"   This town was probably smaller than Sunnydale but it felt better to her slayer senses.

"Not a clue," Riley admitted.   "No answer on his phone?"

"I got the baby.   She cooed at me."   She grinned.   "She sounded happy so I'm guessing they slept in."

"Could be."   He pointed.   "That's an officer."

Faith jogged over.   "Officer?"   He stopped to look at her, grinning slightly.   "Would you know how I get to the Harris house?"

"Xander's paranoid compound?   Yeah, I can give you guys directions.   Friends from LA?"

"Friends from Sunnydale."

"Ah."   He took her to the office to show her the map.   "He's here.   You take this road."   Riley walked in after them.   "You are?"

"With her.   I'm driving."   He nodded and pointed.   "Is the road clear?"

"Yeah, we plow for him now."   They nodded at that.   "The gate has an intercom.   You might have to press for a few minutes.   It's early for him."

"That's fine," Faith agreed. "I called earlier and got Izzy."

He smiled.   "She's very mobile and tried to get away from him in the store the other day."   He checked their car then them.   "There's going to be another snow storm in a few days," he told Riley.   "Does the hummer have four-wheel drive?"

"It's military issue.   I can get us out of there if we have to, Officer."

"Good boy.   Use the intercom because the ATF team dropped one of the guns they came out to get the other day."

"Guns?" Faith asked.   Riley moaned.   "Really?"

"Yeah, he's an armorer," the sheriff agreed.   "The boy got given something by someone and called them to pick it up.   One of the things fell out of their truck on the way out.   They only realized later but it was snowing again."

"It's fine," Riley agreed.   "I'm sure he picked it up by now.   Xander likes his weapons."   Faith gave him an odd look.   "He got the stuff for Buffy."

She nodded.   "Thank you, Officer.   We'll go barge in on them."   They left, taking the roads carefully.   They were still snowy and probably icy underneath.   Riley found the right road and headed out it carefully.   "It's really far out from civilization."

"It gives his daughter room to roam I guess."

"He told me the last owner used to collect weapons."

"That makes more sense," Riley decided.   They found the gate and pulled up, pressing the intercom button.   They got a coo back.   "Izzy, can you go get up daddy?" he asked patiently.

"Hey, Izzy.   It's Auntie Faith.   We need daddy," she called at the continued cooing.   That got a loud squeal.

"You had better not be missionaries, Jehovah's Witnesses, or Avon ladies," a gruff voice growled.

"No, none of the above," Faith said.

"Who the fuck are you?"

"Faith.   And I've got Riley with me.   We need to talk to Xander."

"Next gate up the road," the voice said then hung up.

"Oops, sorry," Faith said.   Riley nodded, pulling off to go up there.   She scooted over to hit the button, getting a grunt of complaint.   "It's Faith and Riley.   X in?"

"Hold on," Dean said.   The gate opened.   "Follow the road, don't deviate."

"Sure," Riley agreed.   He drove up that way, parking in front of the house to let Faith get out in the cleared area.   He slid over to her side to get out and they hurried inside.   "We irritated your neighbor."

"He called," Dean admitted.   "Wait here.   Take off your shoes."   He went to wake up Xander, finding Izzy bouncing next to him.   "What did he do, take something?"   Xander swatted at his voice.   "Visitors."

"No."

"Yeah, there are," he agreed dryly.   Xander covered his head with the blankets.   Izzy giggled, crawling under with him.   He yelped and Izzy got put outside the blanket, making her pout.   "You can't nibble on him today, Izzy.   I think he's sick."

Faith came to the door.   "X, get up," she shouted.   "Before I get talked into having your next spawn by Riley or the watchers."   Izzy squealed and bounced, holding up her arms.   "Hey, Izzy."   She picked her up to cuddle.   "How's my niece?"   She kissed her on the forehead.   "What's wrong with your daddy?"   She walked over to reach in and pinch him, getting punched at.   She flipped back the covers.   "Yeah, he's sick."   She leaned down to kiss him, making him hum but blink at her.   "Riley needs to talk to you.   He brought me to play mediator."

"You didn't call when you got out, Faith."

She yawned.   "I only got out a few days ago."   She hauled him up, looking at him.   "Flu?"

"Probably.   Or Willow did it again."   Dean walked off shuddering.   "Let me visit the potty and get dressed."   Faith nodded, strolling off with the baby.   Xander brought clothes into the bathroom and came out more awake.   "What's wrong?"

"Sunnydale's too infected," Riley said.   "Our bosses want the town to be tanked."

Xander flopped down on the couch, staring at him. "You couldn't take out the vamps?"

"Buffy and my team couldn't together," Riley admitted.

Faith nodded.   "It's very overrun, X."

Xander considered it.   "Dean, can you get into the study and get me the Sunnydale plans?"   Dean brought in the folder.   "Are we talking college and all or just downtown?   Near the hellmouth?"

"Whatever we can but we need to make it look natural," Riley said.   "So we can excuse it as earthquake damage."

Xander looked at him then flipped back to another file, handing it over.   "Cut it off here to save the college and your old base.   If not, bring down your old base to bring down half the college."

Riley smiled.   "I knew you would have something planned."

"Yeah, after the last time I got pissed at Buffy and Willow."   He smiled sweetly.   "Mood swings are dangerous.   You should beware of those."

"She can't do it anymore.   Tara made sure of it."

Xander looked at him.   "If you're sure."   Riley went pale.   "She's not the only witch around, Riley, and Sunnydale would draw some of the chaos ones.   At least from what I heard."

"I'll have it checked out when I get back to base."

"Good.   Because you look pale and shaky."

"What weapon got dropped?" Faith asked.

"I picked it up but there's a drop-off to the left of the road just past the gate."

"Ah."   She smiled at the girl.   "Do you like snow?"

"A lot.   She keeps trying to sneak out to play in it.   Or to help you in the bathroom."

"We can watch out for that," Faith agreed.   The baby was sucking on her fingers.   "Is she hungry?"

"Probably.   Go nuke a ham and cheese hot pocket and let her nibble on the small bits you cut it into.   She'll love you forever."   Faith went to do that.   He looked at Riley.   "Why now?"

"Because it's getting worse and we think another one is trying to open too," Riley said quietly.   Xander just nodded.   "In Cleveland."

"That's going to suck.   Cleveland's a real city."

"It is.   We're hoping to get there to stop it before it builds."

Dean leaned in.   "What about Cleveland?"

"New hellmouth may be opening there," Xander said quietly.

Dean laughed.   "Good joke, guys."   Riley shook his head.   "Not?"

"Not," Riley agreed.

"Oh, hell.   Let me tell some people?"   Riley nodded.   "Is it open?"

"Trying to.   Sunnydale's been fluxing.   We think it's getting ready to shut for good."

"Has anyone told the Council?"

"We tried," Faith called.   "They're playing stupid again."

Xander sighed.   "Doesn't surprise me."   He grabbed the phone and called someone.   "Giles, it's me.   The issue with Sunnydale?   Is it permanent?   Because Riley wants my plans to bring it out."   He listened.   "That's what he said.   Has it been passed back to the Council?"   He grimaced.   "And what are they thinking?   Because I don't need them arranging things to have someone come see me, Giles.   You know they will if they feel thwarted."   He listened.   "Okay.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "You put this as one of yours did it or you cover my ass, Finn.   I'm not going to get tanked by some Fed under the Council's thumb."

"Deal," he agreed, holding out a hand.   Xander paused then shook it.   He stood up.   "Want Faith to stay for a few minutes?"

Faith came out to look at him.   "Can't we fax it so I can spend some time with Izzy?"

"Tara's coming back in a few days," Xander offered.

"Red's down in Devon again.   That way they can whip her ass."

"If this isn't the flu, I'll help."

"Good."   She went back to helping the baby cook.

Dean stomped in.   "They think I'm joking."

Xander took the phone.   "Which one is this?   Hi, Ellen.   No, it's real.   We knew there's another few hellmouths around the world, Ellen.   Cleveland is probably one.   Giles is in LA at the shop.   He'd know.   Yeah, talk to him.   Ellen, they're here asking for plans I made during a mood swing against the girls.   Yeah, those sort for the whole area."   She shuddered.   "Please.   They're saying it's starting to open in Cleveland so we need to be aware it'll start to build, and if it opens we're in deep trouble without someone who can close it."   He nodded.   "I'm at the compound with Dean and Izzy.   Because the car's broken.   Sure, we're here.   Thanks."   He hung up and called Caleb.   "Head's up.   You're going to be getting some new orders."   He smiled.   "Because the hunters in Sunnydale are saying that one's fluxing and starting to open the one in Cleveland."   He listened to the deep, pained moan.   "Exactly.   Dean's calling around.   Giles is in LA.   I've got Finn here with me.   Faith's here too," he admitted.   "No, the Impala blew a belt.   It's on order.   Sure, here's Dean."   He handed the phone over.   "Who is tapping our lines?" he asked Riley.   "I heard a gasp just now."

"I'll stop them," he agreed.   Xander smiled.   "Anything I should know?"

"The ATF team we've worked with to take out most of the old mines is pretty decent.    They're out of the Denver office."

"I'll keep that in mind.   Do they *know*?"

"Yeah, they do."

"Good."   He stood up.   "Faith, are you staying for a few days?"

"Please.   If X doesn't mind?"

"There's the basement room.   Take it," Dean told her.    She smiled and went back to helping Izzy eat her hot pocket.   He listened to Caleb complain.   "No, we think the Council has someone in their pocket."   Xander nodded.   "Any idea who?"

"I think Buck knows."

"He thinks Buck knows," Dean repeated.   "Sure, though nothing is being transmitted."   He smirked at Xander, who pushed the button on the wall below the phone.   Dean winced.   "Sorry, Caleb.   Xander's got an anti-interference thing on the line."

"Since I heard a giggle," Xander said.   "They deserved it."

"They did," Dean agreed.   "So, Caleb....   Yeah, you can do that.   Not an issue.   Thanks, man.   Tell Dad to call."   He hung up.   "This is going to cause a lot of problems."

Riley smirked and called his CO.   "Sir, I am here with Mr. Harris.   He does, sir, but we also think he's about to experience some interference from the agent the Council has on their payroll.   Exactly, sir.   Mr. Winchester is here and calling around to warn others.   Yes, sir.   We do think it could be a problem.   Thank you, sir."   He hung up.   "Let him look, Xander.   We'll see what we can do.   Though...any weapons you want to suddenly be given and honorably turn over?"

"I turn them over to the hunter we know in the ATF."

"Oh.   That's good."   He shook his hand.   "We'll need Faith back in a few days."

"It's awfully quiet up here when it snows, Riley.   She'll go nuts in a few days with nothing but Izzy around here."

"Good point.   Faith, I'm heading back."

"Have a good drive and be careful on the roads."

"I am."   He left, going back to the hummer.   On the way he called his CO back.   "Sir, Mr. Harris seemed to think that a witch decided I should go through what he did to have his daughter.   Can you please schedule me with the base doc, sir?"   He smiled.   "On my way back from Montana, sir.   No, he's hiding here until Sunnydale was safe and Faith could use him.   His daughter's adorable, still, and she's staying for a few days to play with her.   No, I think Maclay can, sir.   Thank you.   On my way back now."   He hung up and sped up once he got onto a bigger main road.   It was well salted and had four lanes of traffic.   It reminded him a lot of Iowa in the winter.

***

Tara appeared a few days later, looking around.   "Faith?"   She looked around.   "Xander?   Dean?"

Dean came up from the garage.   "They're out dragging the deer that got blown up back to field clean.  Izzy is with me."

She smiled, giving him a short hug.   "Hi, Dean."

"Hi."   He grinned.   "I'm fixing the blown belt on the Impala.   Come help."   He opened the back door.   "Tara's here!" he shouted.   He closed and followed her down to find her hugging and dancing around with Izzy.   "She's been bored too."

Faith ran in and down the stairs to hug her.   "There's *nothing* to do around here."

Tara nodded.   "I know.   It's good she's so sweet but I started to want one."

"You should have one," Faith said.   "You'll make a kick-ass mother, Tara."   She hugged the baby.   "Let me get my bag."   She ran up to grab it and came back down with it.   "Thanks, T."

"Welcome, Faith."   She kissed Izzy on the head.   "I'll miss you, princess.   You'll have to come see me soon in Cleveland."

"Yes she will," Xander called down the stairs.   He jogged down, handing her a bottle.   "Here, get her one last one."   They smiled and sat down to feed the baby.   They both would miss her adorableness.   But they were going to be driven nuts if they stayed around here too much longer.   Xander shook his head.   "Maybe someday we'll get to fuss over the baby Tara too."   He grinned at Faith.   "Or yours if you want one."

"Probably not one for me."   She looked at him.   "Flu gone?"

"Yeah, at the moment."

"Do we need to get you a pee stick?" Faith pressed.   He shrugged.   She scowled.   "Xander!"

"I'll talk to the new doc in town if I find out I am, Faith.   Right now, it was the flu and it's staying the flu."   She nodded at that.   He heard a bang and looked back then went to help Dean out of his car's engine.   "Is it possessed?   It bit you yesterday.   Today it tried to swallow you whole."   He checked Dean over.   "Did someone curse your car?"

"Maybe," he admitted.   He scowled at his car.   "If so I'm doing an exorcism *very* quickly."   His car would *not* be like this.   He would not allow his baby to be so beleaguered.   The car started and hit him, knocking him down.

"Heading to the kitchen," Faith said, taking Tara with her since she had the baby.

Xander looked at the car.   "Stop it, Willow.   I mean it."   The lights flashed.   "I will fly to England to kick your ass if you hurt Izzy's favorite uncle.   Take every single spell off that car or else I will make your remaining few hours very unpleasant."   His hands drifted up to his hips.   "You know very well I can and will.   I will get Buffy to help me too."   The car died and seemed to slump.   He laid a hand on it.   It came back so he got something and came back, shooting the taser into it.   He heard Willow shriek through the radio then the magic stopped.   "Tara, it was Willow," he shouted.   "Faith, go start my truck!   Dean's got a broken leg!"   He helped the unconscious man up and out to the truck, sliding him in then walking around to let Faith handle things.   "If Tara doesn't deal with her, have her tell Giles and Buffy both."   He got in and slammed the door shut, reaching over to check Dean's pulse before heading down the road.   He was speeding a bit and the deputy flipped his lights on.   He paused, letting him come up.   "Dean's got a broken leg.   I'm taking him to the ER."   That got a nod and the deputy backed off.   "Thanks, Officer Rich."   He took off again, heading to the ER.   Dean moaned.   "Calm down.   I've got you.   Willow's out of your car."

"What happened?"

"Willow."

Dean sat up and moaned, reaching for his leg.   "Ow.   She bit me."

"She did.   I got her out of there.   You may need to touch the paint up where I hit her with a taser to get her out of your car."

"That's fine."   He shifted, wincing.   "I think I got my head too."

"You were out for a good ten minutes.   We're nearly at the ER.   Just relax."

"I can do without...."

"Dean, it's bleeding so you're poking a bone through."

He looked.   "Damn it."

"Yup."   He pulled in and stopped, then got out, helping Dean out.   He helped him inside, nodding at the nurse.   "His car jumped off the blocks and bit him.   He was unconscious for ten minutes and it looks like the bone broke and is poking through since there's blood."

"Let me get him a chair, sir."   She hurried to do that and Xander helped Dean down.   "Go ahead and park."

"I'll be right back, Dean."   Dean nodded, letting himself be taken back to a room.   Xander jogged out then came back.

"Hey," he said, laying back on the bed at the nurse's push.   "I'm fine."

"Shut up," she ordered.   "Any dizziness?"

"Some," he admitted.

Xander looked in his eyes.   "It's only a small concussion if it is one."

The nurse gave him an odd look.   "EMT?"

"Had seven in the last ten years."

"Oh, dear."   She gave him an odd look.   "Car accidents?"

"No."

"Spousal abuse?"

"Nope.   Bad but not that bad."   She just nodded.   "How's his leg?"

"Can we cut those pants off him?   He's being fussy."

"He's not my boyfriend, ask him."   She blushed.   "I'm his ride, friend, and kinda his in-law.   He's an uncle to my daughter."

"Oh.   Do you want him in here?" she asked Dean.

"He's fine.   He'll hear me complaining about it later anyway."    He wiggled.   "Help me slide them off."   Xander got his boots.   The nurse helped him slide off his pants.   "Glad I wore boxers today."

"It's always fun when boys like you don't," she teased, "but I'm too professional to look."

Xander shrugged.   "I'm not gay no matter how many of my friends want me to be."   She giggled, going to get someone to take the x-rays the poor boy would need.   Plus see if the doctor wanted him to do a CT for the concussion.   She came back with the doctor, finding Xander and Dean talking quietly.   "Any other aches and pains?"

"No, just those," Dean told her.   "Thanks, ma'am."

"Welcome, Mr. Winchester."   She let the doctor check him over.   "I've alerted radiology to be expecting you in a few minutes."

"Please," Dean agreed.   "Can I have some advil or aleeve, doc?"

"You can have all that you want," she agreed.   "Most people would ask for higher drugs."

Dean shrugged.   "It'll be fine.   Let's hope I don't need some heavy ass cast?"

She smiled.   "It's entirely likely, Mr. Winchester."

"Can we minimize it?"

"We'll see.   If you don't need pins to hold it together."

"Please don't let me need pins," he begged, looking up.   "Please?   I've been good."

"If at all possible.   Maybe Tara can help with some herbal stuff to make it heal faster," Xander offered.   The doctor gave him an odd look.   "Our friend is very into herbal stuff.   She's a very good witch."

"Okay.   It probably won't hurt but do watch him for reactions."

"Of course," Xander agreed.   "Anything else would be bad of me."

"Good.   Let's get him some x-rays.   Do you think it's likely the concussion is going to impact your daily life for more than a few days?   If so, we can schedule you a CT."

"We live outside of town," Xander said.   "By the river."

She winced.   "Let's do one then.   Just in case."    She stepped back.   "Go ahead and send him up," she told the nurse.   She got orderlies.   She smiled when Xander went with him.   "You can call his significant other from the cellphone room up there, sir."

Xander nodded.   "I should."   He went to do that once they got off the elevator.   "Faith, me.   So far, concussion, compound fracture of his leg.   Tell me she's in pain?"   He grimaced.   "Tara's still crying, huh?   Sure, I can do that."   He hung up and called John, grimacing at his unhappy answer.   "I'm not going to make your night, John.   Because I am in a hospital, that's why you heard the PA announcement.   No, not Izzy.   Dean."   He started to pace.   "Compound fracture of his left leg, concussion. Want the whole rant or just the partial story?" he asked at the 'what happened' demand.   John said something smart so he grimaced.

"I had to get Willow out of the Impala.   She was possessing it.   She made it hit him and bite him.   Slammed the hood down on his back.   Last night the engine scraped him in an improbable way.   Today she made it move, knocking him down.   I got her out with a taser.   Devon, England.   Tara's sobbing about it.   Faith's got Izzy.   Giles does.   Oh, did you get the call from Dean about Cleveland?   It appears Sunnydale's going down and Cleveland is going up."   He heard the splutter.   "They're checking into it, but Dean's in x-ray and then a CT for his head.   You might be able to get in.   Road's nearly impassible for anything less than a pickup.   It won't be plowed until tomorrow.   I thought you were somewhere nearby, yeah.   No, taser, John.   Sent her back when it broke the link.   He was fixing the belt that snapped when he tried to leave."

He felt his stomach turn and grimaced, keeping it down with some deep breathing.   "No, nauseous.   I had the flu earlier this week, John.   I'm pretty sure I'm not, thank you."   He grimaced.   "I'm waiting on Dean, John.   He needs me able to drive him home.   I won't be able to then.   Sure, come on up."   He hung up.    Then he went to the bathroom to get sick.   He was *so* going to kill a certain redhead he knew.   He came out and went down to the ER, finding the same nurse.   "Can I sign myself in?"

"Sure, for what reason?"

"Either I have the flu or I'm pregnant again."

She laughed.   "Were you now?"   He lifted his shirt.   She stared at the incision.   "Really?"   He nodded.   "How?"

"The same redhead who made his car bite him."

"Let me get the doctor for you?"

"Sure.   I'm hoping it's the flu."

"Me too."   She went to get the doctor, hissing in her ear.

The doctor looked at her.   "I heard about that."   She went to check on him.   "Flu-likesymptoms?"

"Nausea, vomiting, headache?" he asked dryly.   "Or it's morning sickness.   And I know that the thing that they put it into last time isn't connected to anything and I haven't had sex anyway since before she was born.   She's just over a year."

"Let me check that, it could be a problem with that...organ."

"Sure.   Just....tell me?"   She nodded, going to get the ultrasound machine they had down there.   She came back with it and he sighed, taking off his shirts and pushing down his jeans.   "Go ahead.   I had a few last time."

"You had good prenatal care?"

"I had pretty decent from a doc in LA but he got killed by an accident a few months before I was due.   With the cult to Izzy, I went to hide in North Dakota with someone Dean knows.   They found a doc to take her out so they could protect me from them."

"That makes sense.   The usual place?"   He outlined where it was the last time he had seen it on the ultrasound.   She prepped the area and turned on the machine, staring at it.   "I'll be damned, that is a uterus."   She moved the wand, frowning.   "I can't see any evidence of you being pregnant."   She turned it off and wiped off his stomach.   "Let me draw some blood?"

"I have insurance."   She smiled, taking the stuff from a drawer to draw blood.   "Thank you."

"Hopefully it's just a nasty case of the flu or food poisoning."

"Hopefully.   Is Dean nearly done?   I don't want to worry him."

"He'll still be in the CT, Mr. Harris."   She rushed it up to the lab, putting it down.   "It's the flu or he's got food poisoning or he's pregnant.   Find it for me?"

The tech gave her an odd look.   "He?"   She nodded.   "Okay then."   She ran the sample while she waited.   "Negative on pregnancy."

"Run the rest of the tests and I'll have him notified of the results."   She smiled and went down to check on him.   "You're not."   He slumped, nodding in relief.    "Have you thought about having it removed?"

"The doctor wasn't sure if it would create problems."

"Maybe you should ask an obstetrical surgeon about that."   He nodded.   "Good boy.   If you keep getting sick, I want you to see your normal doctor."

"I will.   I was going to start seeing the new guy in town."

"That's fine.   We'll send you the results of the rest of the blood work."

"Thank you."

"Welcome.   For the flu, tylenol, a lot of liquids, and try some dramamine for the nausea and motion sickness."

"I hadn't thought about that."    He grinned.   "Thank you."

"Welcome."   She called upstairs.   "Is Mr. Winchester ready to come back yet?"   She smiled.   "Thank you."   She hung up.   "He'll be right back down.   Let's get you back to his room."   He nodded, following her back, signing the paperwork for the nurse.   Dean came back in and she got the report beeped to her a minute later.   Then the orthopedist came in with her.   "Well...."

Dean groaned.   "Pins?"

"No.   Cast yes.   Heavy, stiff cast instead of an air cast," the orthopedist offered.   He called up the x-rays on the computer to let him see, not seeing him flinch.   "Most people react."

Dean shrugged.   "I've had broken bones before."

"Usual concussion precautions?" Xander asked.   The original doctor nodded.   "I can do that."   The orthopedist looked at him.   "I've had a few and we have a nice wooden seat we can put in his shower for him."

"Good.   Had a broken bone?"

"Arm."   That got a nod and he went to get the casting materials after fixing the bone for Dean.

Dean looked at him.   "You okay?   You look pale and shaky again."

"I'm not."

"They can check you."

"They did.   I'm not."

"Thank god since I've been the only one there for weeks outside of Faith.   It'd be too redneck if you had my kid and my niece."

The original doctor snickered.   "That would be."

The orthopedist came back with the rolling tray.   "Let's get you fixed up.   It's going to start snowing again."   Dean moaned.   "It'll be all right."

"I can run a stocking run on my own tomorrow," Xander promised.   "It's not supposed to collect any more on the ground."   Dean nodded, letting the doctor handle his leg.

***

Xander pulled back in, letting his truck idle next to the front door for a minute.   He got out and walked around to help Dean out.   They had given him a shot of something because he was flinching and bouncing.   It had put him to sleep on the way to the truck.   So now Xander carried him inside, putting him on the couch.   Then he went out to park his truck back on the side of the building.   He walked back inside and locked the house up, looking at Faith.   "Tara still here?"

"She's talking with Willow."

"Good.   Keeps me from killing her."   Faith gave him an odd look.   "She possessed his car."

"His car means tons to him from what you said."   Xander nodded.   "Shit.   That was low."

"Very."   He looked down then at her.   "John'll be here soon.   Probably late tomorrow."

"Tara will be back in a few hours.   Think you can handle it?"

"Yeah.   I need to do a stocking run tomorrow but yeah."   She nodded at that.   "Did we tell Giles?"

"Tweedy answered the phone sounding drunk and slurred 'bloody hell, I'll kill the quim' before hanging up.   Tara was looking like he'd have to call her back to do it."

"If she doesn't, I will be."

"Um, X?   Mood swing?"

"Nope," he said with a grin.   "I had them check when I got sick there."

"Good.   Because you're a bit scary."

He nodded.   "I am and for a good reason."   She laughed, going into the kitchen.   "Can you bring that wooden stool in there into the shower for him?"

"Sure.   Izzy's down."

"She'll baby him tomorrow."   He picked Dean up, making him moan.   "Putting you to bed, Dean.   I'll wake you in a while."   He carried him in there, putting him into bed and tucking him in loosely.   "Rest."   He went to get his own coffee. "You okay?"

"I'm fine and the car's okay now.   She made sure before she left to kick her girl's butt."

He smiled.   "Better her than me.   Willow would be begging if it were me."

"She tried to get clean, X."

"Yeah, and then she went back to get Tara to pay attention to her."   Faith gaped.   "Pretty clear this is an attention grabbing move."   Tara appeared still crying.   "You kill her?"   He pulled her in to hug.   "It'll be okay."

"She's bad," she sobbed.

He nodded.   "A bit."   She looked at him.   "She could be demonic.   She's not."   Tara nodded, cleaning her cheeks off.   "Did you call Angel or them to say you'd be late?"   She shook her head.   "Then go ahead and take Faith.   John's coming and I'm sure he's going to snarl at us.   You don't deserve that."   She nodded, grabbing Faith's things to take her back to LA.   Xander went to check on his daughter then fixed the heat for the night before turning in.   He was going to have a long day tomorrow.

***

John pounded on the door before walking in and turning off the alarms.   "Dean?" he yelled.

"He gets woken in an hour," Xander called from Izzy's room.   He came out with her half-dressed.   "He's okay.   The concussion wasn't serious.   The compound fracture was put back into place without pins or anything.   It's casted."   John nodded once.    "I've got stuff for his nausea when he wakes up again.   There's coffee brewing and I've got to finish dressing her."   She was cooing at her grandfather, pouting because he wasn't trying to pick her up.   "Here, give her a hug so I can get her dressed?"

John took her to hug.   "Hi, Izzy.   You're a good girl."   She beamed and let Daddy finish dressing her while John checked on Dean then went to check on his former car.   It looked all right.   A burn mark on the hood.   One belt was clearly off and being replaced.   Xander came down with her.   "What happened?"

"He backed out of the garage, turned around to leave, and the belt blew.   Sam went to answer the call anyway while Dean fixed her."   John pointed at the burn mark.   "I used a taser to cut the connection between Willow and the car."

"You sure it was her?"

"It was an attention ploy," he said quietly.   "Tara went to beat her ass so I didn't have to.   She's with the witches in Devon again anyway."   John nodded once.   "Giles does know.   We called him so he could kick her ass and if I find her I'm probably going to smack her around at least."

"Are you pregnant again?"

"Flu all week but no.   I had them check last night when I got sick again."   John relaxed.   "I'm not so sure the belt snapping and all this wasn't to keep Dean here so I'd come to like him.   Sometimes Willow's mind goes that way."

John shuddered.   "If it is, I get to beat her ass before I shoot her."

"I'm leaving the shooting and beating to Dean.   Speaking of, I've got to do a stocking run later.   Can you help Dean watch her?"

"Of course.   How much do you have to stock?"

"Probably just a truck full.   Coffee, soda, milk, bread.   Oh, if the brownies come back, the stuff for them is overtop of the water heater and they can have any of the rolls that're left.   They liked the garlic rolls I found last time."

"We have brownies?"

"Yeah, in the woods.   They've been pretty good about telling us when the fence is crossed."

"That's fine I guess.   They're peaceful?"

"So far.   I've got honey, milk powder, and there's rolls in the fridge."

"I can do that."   He took the baby.   "Are you okay?   Did you get the flu again?"

"Thankfully not.   Even though she did try to bite my nose recently."   He walked off.   "I've got coffee started, John.   Let me work on her breakfast while you get Dean up."

"I can do that."   He carried her up there, looking at his sleeping son.   He was cute like that.   "Dean?" he called.   Dean flinched, grabbing his head with a moan.   "It's the concussion, son.   Want some aleeve?"

"Axe?" he asked quietly.   He blinked at his dad.   "How late did I sleep in?"

"I was in Iowa."   He let the baby down on the bed since she was wiggling to be put down.   "No, don't touch that," he ordered.   "That's a booboo."   He smacked her hand, getting an outraged look.   "No."

She pouted, hugging her uncle.   "Baba?"

"We can get you breakfast in a minute, Izzy.   You're a good girl most of the time."   He kissed her on the head.   "Go find Daddy?"

"I'm working on breakfast.   The stool's in the shower and there's a box of trashbags and some rope in there to cover the cast," Xander called from the kitchen.   He came in to get her.   "Want some eggies with your juice?"   She squealed and babbled at him.   "Good job.   You made him feel much better, princess."   He put her in her highchair, making her a happy toddler.

John helped Dean into the bathroom, leaving him to handle his own bathroom and shower needs.   He went to get his coffee.   "Thanks, kid."

"Last night I was ready to kill her myself," Xander admitted.   He fed her another bite of egg.   "Can you check the canister in the back of the cabinet?   See how much I have left?"   John pulled it down to count, grimacing at it.   "Under a grand?"

"Six hundred."

"I thought I had more."

"You probably spent it on the last stocking run," Dean said as he limped in with the crutches that had been in the bathroom.   "I'll shower in a while.   When I'm more awake."  Xander pushed over food.   "We're doing fine on food, Xander."

"We need coffee and toilet paper, some milk and bread too."

"Fine.   What about your savings?"

"I've got a little bit.   I'm leaving it in the bank and spending that stuff first."

"Didn't you stuff some of it into a wall?" John asked.

"That is that."

"I thought you had two stashes," Dean said.   Xander gave him a confused look.   "Let me look, Xander."

"I thought Chris took part of that since we found it."

"If he did, I'm going to have Buck kick his ass," John decided.   He went to call him.   "Buck, John.   Where did Xander stash that money?"   He wrote it down.   "You sure that was all?"   He nodded.   "Okay.   Running a bit short and Dean just got his leg broken.   He's planning on some stocking time."   He nodded, making another note.   "I can do that."

"Ask him if official notice of Cleveland going to hell has started," Xander called.

"Did you guys hear that the new hellmouth in Cleveland is trying to open since Sunnydale's been fluxing?"   He smiled at the disgruntled noises.   "Hey, feel lucky it's not in Denver, Buck."   He laughed.   "Sure.   Compound, small concussion.   No, just a cast.   Izzy's already tried to pat it.   Thanks.   Tell Sammy if you can find him."   He hung up, going back in there.   "These places, Xander?"   Xander frowned, looking very confused.   "Xander, when did you hide them?"

"Four days after they left?"

"Xander, what's Izzy's birthday and what did she eat for it?" Dean asked.

"The seventh of last month and she had fish sticks?"

He leaned over to smack him on the head.   "Memory spell."

"I'll gut her," Xander vowed.   John went to look at the stashes, coming back with money.   He had known the kid had more.   He also texted Bobby to see what they could do about it.   Because that witch was going to get his foot up her ass very shortly.   He wondered how much flying to England would cost.

Bobby texted back he sent an email.   John got into it and started to paint the runes around the house.   "Dad?" Dean asked.   "What're you doing?"

"Protecting the house so she can't do it again."

"Oh, okay."   He looked at Xander, seeing him tranced out.   He called Tara.   "It's Dean.   Willow seems to have memory charmed Xander and he's now tranced out with the fork halfway to Izzy's mouth.   She's trying to get it from him."   He took the bite off the fork to let her suck it off his finger.   "Please.   If you're not too tired, Tara."   He hung up when she appeared.   He waved a hand.   Another witch appeared.   "Who're you?"

"I'm the head of the Devon Coven.   I heard there's a problem with our student.   Again?"

Dean nodded, pointing at his leg.   "Broken because she was possessing my car and attacked me.   Wiped some of Xander's memories so he wouldn't remember where he hid money.   And now you can see that."

She looked and moaned.   "That's not good."   Tara scowled.   "Do not give me that look, young lady."

"We trust her as a witch," Dean countered.   "Leave Tara alone.   She's a good girl and an excellent, ethical witch."

"Good!   Apparently the world could use more."

"Willow's getting attention this way," Tara said quietly.   "I won't have it."

She gave her a look.   "You're the girlfriend."   Tara nodded.   "I'd paddle the girl if she were mine."   She checked Xander and they got to work unraveling the spells around him.   "What is that other spell?"

"She made him have the lock to the realm merging," Dean said with a point at Izzy.   "We found out last night he's not pregnant again thankfully."

"He's been prepped to have another one."   Dean whimpered.   "By the same witch."  Shepatted her on the head.   "She's adorable."

"Everyone says that.   Is that a spell?"

She looked then shook her head.   "She looks more innocent and sweet next to you hunters."   He nodded, understanding that.   "Totally mundane though."   He grinned and nodded.   "Yours?"

"Niece.   My brother's daughter."

"That's even better."   She looked over Xander, ending the spells and making them snap back at her.   And the ones underneath too.   All the spells on him.   "He was possessed?"

"A few times," Dean agreed.   "He can't get rid of them so leave them alone."

"I can do that."   She finished up and let Tara cast the protection around him.   "Good work, child."   She gave her a shy smile.   "We get so few good witches that have potential and who don't need help to heal.   We'd love to host you for some training."

Tara shrugged.   "I don't know.   I work with the team in LA."

"It's a hard calling.   Do remember us if you need support or just to talk.   Plenty of us have done the same thing."   She patted her on the cheek then they woke Xander up.   He flinched, looking around.   "Calm down.   We're here to take the bad magic off you."

"What did she do this time?" Xander asked.

"Memory spells," Dean said.   "A few others.   You froze feeding Izzy.   You forgot where you put the money."   Xander groaned, putting his head down.   The baby petted him, making begging noises.   Tara sat down to feed her.   "You're good," Dean teased.

"I have to be," she teased back.   John came in to look at her.   "I'm fine.   Just upset."

"I'd be pissed too if she was mine.  Then I'd be single."  And probably grieving but he wouldn't tell her that.  Tara was too delicate for that suggestion.

The witch looked at him.   "You don't have to fly over.   There's a few matrons of the coven who would *love* to correct her for everyone else."   She looked at Xander.   "She prepped you to have another one."

"They tested, I'm not pregnant."

"No, but now all you need is the ending spell."   Xander shuddered.   "We can block it some, but it won't be foolproof."

"Can I have it removed?"

Tara shook her head.   "It could hurt Izzy.   The spell linked her to you."

"So if he gets hurt on a hunt, what happens to her?" Dean asked.

"Shouldn't be anything," the older witch said.   "But if he's killed it could rebound into her.   Create some backlash and make her ill.   Having the uterus taken out would do the same."

"I don't want my daughter to be sick," Xander said.   "Thank you for letting me know.   Can I help beat her ass?"

"We'll send her back for further correction."   She patted Izzy's head.   "She's perfectly mundane."

"We know.   I'm kinda hoping she goes to a field that has nothing to do with hunting."

"Good boy.   She's well taken care of.   Even if you do have help."   She smiled at Tara.   "We should go talk to her."

Tara looked at her.   "I'll lose my temper.   That would be bad of me."

"Perhaps, but we can keep you from using her soul to destroy things."   She held out a hand.   "Come, child.   If she's yours then you should have some say in her punishment."   Tara looked at Xander, who gave her a hug.   "Unless you want us to tell you later?"

Tara shook her head.   "I want to beat her to death with a broom."   She took her hand, letting her take them back to where Willow was.   Tara looked at Willow, then at the senior witch.   "Stop me if I go too far?"

"Of course, child."

Tara stepped forward, staring at her girlfriend.   "I'm very ashamed."

"I was trying to make Xander happy," she defended.   Tara hauled off to slap her.   Willow gasped, holding her cheek.   "Tara?"   She let out a sniffle.   "You hit me?"

"I'm controlling my temper.   I was in the room when the car got Dean.   So were Isabelle and Faith," she said quietly.   "You made Xander forgot where he put the money.   You hurt Xander.   Being pregnant wasn't easy for him."   She looked back then at Willow.   "I want to be mean to you but I'm not a mean person."   She shook her head.   "I can't.   I'll lose my temper and hurt you."   She walked off.   Willow burst out crying.   Tara made herself keep going out to the garden.   One of the witches followed her to give her a hug.

***

John helped Xander unload the truck.  "You okay?"

"Willow and I have been friends since the first day of school.   I was pissed when I got pregnant.   I'm even more pissed now.   I'm not sure I can forgive her for this one, no matter the reason."

John nodded. "I'm not as forgiving as you are, kid.   I would've dumped her a few years back."   Xander nodded.   "C'mon.   We're letting in the cold air."   He turned and found a happy baby playing in the snow.   "Figures.   Dean used to do that too."   He put his bags down quickly and came back to grab her.   "You need your snow suit for that, Isabelle."   He carried her inside to put her on Dean's lap.   She smiled, patting him until he grunted at her.   "Hold her while we unload the truck."   He went back to help some more.   "No flour or sugar?"

"In barrels in the basement."

"Barrels?"

"Yeah, old time barrels."   He brought in the last load, letting John see those supplies.   John moaned.   Xander grinned.   "I had to look but that's how they used to store them, right?"

"Way back when.   My grandparents used to have those sort of things."   He checked the chest freezer.   "Same deer?"

"New mine deer."

"Ah."    He followed him back up to help putting things up.   Dean was letting Izzy pat his hair for him.   "Shower, son?"

"I did, Dad.   I'm a bit sweaty since I'm next to the fireplace."   He sat up with a groan, putting her onto the floor.   "Go help Daddy so I can put on a thinner shirt?"   She pouted.  "Don't get near the crutches this time."   He got up and hopped to his room, changing his shirt to a t-shirt instead of a thin sweater.   He came out to sit in the kitchen.    Izzy had decided to stare out the window again for now.   "What's for dinner?"

"Spoiled son stew," John said dryly.

"He doesn't hardly let me cook, Dad."

"Fine."   He looked at Xander.   "He can cook."

"I need to cook for her.   It's better for her and the more I do it the better I get."

"She'd be satisfied with whatever you can do, Xander."   He sat down, picking her up.   She gave him a smile and a cuddle, using his shoulder to try to reach for something.   "What?"   He looked, pulling over the box of animal crackers.

"She doesn't like to eat those, just look at the box," Dean said.   Xander got a snack pack from the fridge before he could move.   "Thanks, Xander."

"Welcome."   He opened it and handed it to her, making her squeal in happiness.   "You learned that off Dawn," he teased, poking her on the nose.   She sucked on his finger.   "I love you too, fussy."   She picked up a gummy fruit treat to gnaw on.

"Aren't those too small?" John asked.

"They dissolve really fast," Dean told him.   "She'd have them sucked dry before they could choke her."

"Wish they'd had these when you two were little.   Sammy would've inhaled them by the crate."

"He sneaks hers when he's here," Dean said.   He looked around.   "You couldn't find Sammy?"

"His phone was off when I tried to call and tell him."

Dean grimaced, calling his brother's phone.   "Bad news."   Sam groaned something.   "No, worse.   Rosenburg possessed the car and it ran me down.   Broken leg.   Left thankfully.   We think the broken belt might've been part of the same problem.    No, compound fracture," he said, sighing as he moved the cast.   "Heavy cast that Izzy petted to make me feel better.   Dad's here too.   Xander called him I'm guessing since he doesn't have 'son getting in trouble' radar anymore," he said dryly.

"I never needed it for you, Dean.   Except when you went out with bad girls."

"Bad girls have more fun," he quipped back.   "Yeah, so I'm stuck and the car still needs to finish getting fixed.   We're about snowed in again, Sammy, but you can try.   Thanks, man."   He hung up.   "He's with Buck.   I heard JD complaining in the background."

"Did he hear anything new about the council's toady agent?"

"Not that I've heard," Dean admitted.   "Want me to call him?"

"No, I'll get the guy and ask him myself.   The sheriff was watching someone new to town the other day and he wasn't looking pleased."   Dean gave him an odd look.   Xander just smiled.   "I noticed it while I was getting groceries."   He snuck another fruit bite since Izzy was playing with them.   She gave him a hurt look and ate another one.   "You can play with your food later, Izzy.   For now eat."

John looked at him.   "How sure are you?"

Xander grinned sweetly.   "Fairly certain he had something to do with the new person."   He handed over the spatula.   "Should I go ask him?"

"Go ahead.   Let's see who he is," Dean agreed, handing Izzy another fruit bite.   She grinned and put it into the pieces she was moving on the table.   Apparently it made pretty waves of colors as she shoved them around.

Xander grabbed his outdoor clothes and headed out, sneaking around to the place where the van was parked in the shelter of some trees.   He used the knife in his hands on the tire, bringing someone out of the back.   "Hi, why are you trespassing?"

"We have a warrant."

"Then I'd present it since you're trespassing."

"I don't have to."

Xander knocked the guy out.   He checked the van then carried the guy off, using the rope he had stored out there to hang him securely from a tree.   Then he waited until the guy woke up.   "I'm seriously amused that you have such a glass jaw, dude.   Now, who are you?   What are you doing here?   And are you the Fed that's dirty to the Watchers Council or is it your boss?"

"You deal weapons."

"No I don't.   I collect weapons.   Anything too big that I get given, I hand to the ATF.   By the way, you're hanging over a mine they didn't get to remove yet.   I'd quit struggling to get out of those ropes."   He stopped, giving him a horrified look.   "You'll be fine and won't fall as long as you don't struggle.   I'm not that mean unless you threaten my daughter.   Which you kinda are."   He stared at him.   "I don't sell weapons."

"You're one of those freaks who believe demons are real," he sneered.

"I'm also from Sunnydale."   The man went paler than normal.   "As a matter of fact, I was in the middle of the protection of Sunnydale."   He called a number in his phone.   "Travers, Xander Harris," he said sounding kinda happy. "I have one of your toadies strung up over a mine in my yard that the ATF hasn't dealt with yet.   Did you really need to know something this badly that you couldn't have Wes or Giles *ask* me?"   He listened to the spluttering.   "Or you can't call and ask yourself?"   Travers complained something.

"No I'm not, Travers.   Collecting and I hand over everything too big to the ATF.   Why would I need something that large?"   He listened.   "Riley Finn's people made that decision.   No, that was mood swing thinking for me," he said dryly.   "We don't care if you don't think it's right; they can tell when it has an energy flux.   Yes, without that.   There's machines that can read those things."   He rolled his eyes.   "I don't know, ask him.   I'm not in the military, Travers."   He looked at the guy.

"His ID said NCIS but he's clearly in your employ since he said something about demons.   Yeah, that guy.   Well, it does snow in Montana, Travers.   The nice ATF team hasn't been able to remove all the old owner's mines yet.   So he's hanging above one.   Perfectly safe if he doesn't move.   Actually there are agents who know.   After all, the Initiative's files are known about here and there."   He smirked at the agent since he was shuddering.   "Think they didn't?   I had Spike, hostile seventeen, as a roomie a few times."

He walked off.   "Sure, I'll let them come get him all they want.   But I would call off my dogs.   Remember what happened the last time you threatened my daughter?   Right now she's being put in danger because of you.   Exactly."   He smiled sweetly at the sheriff when he drove through the gate.   "If he doesn't move he's perfectly safe.   I made sure of it and he's a bad Fed, Sheriff."

"Still not right, kid."

"Yay him.   He's a dirty Fed sent by the Watchers Council because they're too dumb to ask me themselves.   I was going to call Chris to see if he wanted him or if he'd call Internal Affairs on him."   He went back to the spluttering going on.   "Yes, Travers, I do not like you.   I can't imagine why," he said dryly.   He smirked.   "Sheriff, he's over a mine."

"Figured he was."

"Next time, don't let him sneak into my daughter's room."   The Sheriff winced.   "Yes, Travers, I am going to accuse him of that.   Now, would you like to ask any other questions since you have me on the line?   Because you know, I will answer polite questions or ones you send through Wesley or Giles.   It's bad enough I had to deal with Willow recently.   Again."   He smiled.   "No, I'm not pregnant again.   I've had the flu because she's prepped me to have another one.   I can't or it can kill Izzy.   Anything else?"   He nodded.   "That's fine.   I was going to call them anyway."   He laughed.   "Travers, we do know that I know where *your* warehouses are as well?"   The man whimpered.

"Yeah, me, because I snooped in Giles' stuff.   That means I can find enough stuff to turn you into the Feds and all that.   Easily.   Especially with your hit team in town."   He pulled his gun, pointing it at the van trying to get into his gate.   "Sheriff, we have bigger problems.   They sent an extermination and extraction team."   He hung up and called Buck.   "I've got a small 911.   A dirty Fed to the Council who claimed he had a warrant but still snuck into Izzy's room to plant a camera and now a hunt team on my gate.   Extermination hunt team, Buck.   How far can I take it?   Well, he's hanging over a mine at the moment but how far can I take the team?"   He nodded.

"Deal.   Dean's injured.   Please."   He hung up, looking at the Sheriff.   "They won't hesitate to shoot you and him.   Go get my daughter out with Dean?"   He nodded, going to do that while Xander checked his gun.   Xander snuck up on the wall, getting up out of sight and moving into position where he could get the van if they got out.   He got there in time to blow the tire on the side with an exiting assassin.   They fled back into the van.   "So very stupid, boys.   Not like I'm the one who'd care about your blood on my hands.   Especially not with my daughter in the house."

"We're here to pick her up for training, sir," one shouted.

"She's not a slayer.   Even Travers saw that when he got his jaw broken.   There's no mole and even the Host said that she's a mundane.   No witchly powers, nothing."

"We can train her to be a watcher."

"I don't want her to be a watcher.   I want her to be normal and mundane.   If she wants to join the hunting life, she can make that decision when she's of age, not before."   He fired at one of the guys trying to sneak out on the other side, making him scream in pain.   "The snow makes the blood easy to track," he called.   "And you're pissing me off."

"You won't kill us."

"Do you think I cared who got hurt when I helped free the Initiative's hostages?   I shot then and didn't care.   I know I got at least a few soldiers.   You guys can just add to the count."   They fled back to the van, trying to back up.   Xander got another tire.   "That was terminally stupid."   Sirens were coming.   "Great.   Let's hope that's backup."   Two state trooper SUVs pulled in.   "Guys, these nice people are trying to break in to kill me, kill everyone in my house but my daughter so they can take her to an isolationist group in England.   Up to and including making a Fed dirty so he can give them intel."

"Sir, who are you?" one cop asked, looking around.  "Where are you as well?"

Xander came out of his perch, walking along the wall carefully.   "Xander Harris."   The trooper gave him an odd look.   "Seen the most adorable little girl Izzy in town?"   He nodded slowly.   "Her daddy."

"Okay.   And these are?"

"Watchers Council people out of England.   Their dirty Fed is hanging over one of the mines the ATF team didn't get to remove.   The local Sheriff is hiding my daughter for me right now."

They looked at each other then nodded.   "Not the first time?"

"They seem to think my daughter's a savior of some sort.   This isn't the first time someone's tried to take her.   The cult to her cuteness tried to destroy a town to get her."   He sat on the top of the gate.   "You can have my gun if you need it.   They're technically on my property even on this side of the gate.   All the way back to the turnoff.   The Fed's van is off to the side.   It has a blown tire.   This one has two and one guy's bleeding."

"I can see that.   Economical of you, sir.   A hunter?"

Xander smiled.   "Of many things."   He got an odd look.   "Old Kyle, who used to own this place, and I share part of the same job and calling."

"Weapons?" one asked.

"I have a few but the ATF confiscated anything too big of Kyle's that was left."

That got a nod.   "Thank you for listening to reason, sir.   Can I have the gun?"   Xander handed it down.   "Thank you.   Can you come down?"

"No.   They threatened my daughter.   You're lucky they're alive.   If I come down there, they're going to be injured at the very least."

"Sure, you sit there and work on your temper."   They heard an engine.   "Who's that?"

"Could be the agents I called to get permission to blow them away but it's only been a few minutes.   It's more likely it's one of you guys or one of their guys."   The local deputy pulled up.   "Officer Rich, he's in guarding my daughter."

"We can help."

"Go untie the Fed from overtop of the mine," he offered.   He shifted and kicked open the lock on the gate to let him in.   "Before you ask, that guy's dirty to the same mantwats who sent this nice extermination team."

The deputy grimaced at them.   "I pity you if he comes off that gateway.   I really do."

"Which is why I'm staying up here.   I called Buck first," Xander admitted.   That got a smile.   He looked at them again.   "One's missing."   They looked and the troopers found him trying to sneak through the gate.   Xander threw something in front of the guy, making him stop and back up slowly.   "I'm going to make you suffer so much that even God will beg for mercy for your soul," he growled.   "Get off my land."   The guy backed up.   "Now!"   He let the trooper take him back.   Xander came down to get the blade and turn off the grenade he had hung on the handle.   He stared at him.   "Do you really think it's a good day to piss me off?"

"Are you pregnant again?"

"No.   Willow tried and started to but she never completed it."   They shuddered.   "So yeah, feeling great anyway.   Off my land before I go to England to destroy the *entire* Council.   Remember, I'm not the nice one."   The watcher backed off, letting the trooper take him.   He went to help the poor deputy, handing the guy over once he had cut him down.   "His truck's over there," he said with a point.   "One slit tire."

"We can have it towed until his boss can give us some answers."

"Thank you."   He walked back there, tipping someone's face up.   "Do we remember why we don't piss off the Sunnydale crew?"   He shook his head.   "Willow!"   She appeared sobbing.   Tara came with her.   "These nice people are an extermination team from the Council."

"I'll fucking kill them," Willow snarled.   Tara gave her a heated glare.   "No, this deserves some work.   Izzy's not a slayer."

"She can become a watcher."

"Why would she want to be that stupid?" Xander asked.   "If she wants to research later on, there's plenty of hunters she can do it for.   Like her daddy."   They backed off.   "Now, Willow, Dean is somewhere around here and you owe him a most major apology.   I'm still too angry to listen to one from you about restarting that spell.   I'd beg and plead at Dean's feet though.   Because he can probably get you from the front porch with a rifle."   She went to do that.   Tara followed.   Then they'd be dealing with the council.   Xander looked at the state troopers. "Are you sure I can't have them?"

"He's very scary over his daughter's safety," the deputy said.   "Even the FBI said that when they arrested the cult to his daughter because they tried to take over a town."

"I only pulled the front of their church off and then walked inside to get her back.   They shouldn't have taken her from daycare."

"Sir, you hunt... those things?" one trooper asked quietly.    Xander nodded.   "Are you on hiatus?"

"My town's too dangerous and I was on the town protection patrol," he said quietly.   "Until it's not too dangerous I can't be there with my daughter to help.   So we're hiding here kinda and I'm helping some other hunters now and then too."

"That's fine then, sir.   The mines we heard were around?"

"ATF removed most of them and let me remine the fence area because of the cult that kept trying to break in.   They should be off at the moment."

"I called the sheriff.   He turned them off," the deputy said.   "Once they got here."   Xander nodded.   "You calmer?"

Xander snorted.   "Hell no!"

"Fine.   What happened to Dean?"

"The redhead made his car bite him so he'd have more time here so I'd hit on him," he said dryly.   "Which is why she's begging for mercy from him at the moment."

"Good!"   He shuddered.   "She's the one...."   He pointed at Xander's stomach, getting a nod.   "She needs to beg a lot of people."

"Well, yeah.   She even tried it again but it hasn't taken."   He gave him an insane grin.   The deputy laughed, walking the Fed off to the car.   "I called Buck for permission."

"I'll be expecting his boss to come scowl at these idiots then."   He shut him into the back, going to help the troopers with the others. "Call us first, Harris."

Xander looked at him.   "They make it farther than the gate, you can clean them up."   That got a nod.   "My daughter is too precious to risk to their insanity."

"Anything that could get their higher ups arrested?" the state trooper asked hopefully.

"They're mostly in England.   Have weapons and ancient books, but most of the weapons are swords and things.   They might have a gun vault.   But then again they do have US warehouses for their people to use in case of emergency."   He smiled sweetly.   "I know there's one in LA and one in New York, plus one somewhere in St. Louis since they've got a guy there."   They shuddered.   "As for local?   Don't know.   You might wanna ask Willow if she can hack them for you."

"It might make the Feds happier to see us," one decided, hiking up to the house to check on the people up there.   The redhead was a sobbing mess on the floor.   "Sir, are you done beating her or can we have her help us?"

"Take her before I shoot her," Dean ordered.   "Because I'm thinking putting her down for safety reasons is a good thing."

"Sure, we can do that."   He hauled her up, shaking her a bit.   "We need to know where they have warehouses around here, miss.   Before they come back."

She wiped her cheeks off.   "I've hacked the Council before.   I can do it again."   She let him walk her out.   "I'm really sorry, Dean.   I was trying to make Xander happy by setting you two up."   She turned back around to trudge up the road.   "This is pretty here."

"It is but he still hasn't gotten all the mines off the lawn."   She flicked a hand and they went off.   "You'll need to tell him if you got the new ones too."

"No.   They're harder to set off."   He took her back to the local police department, letting her look at their computers.   When agents stomped in she smiled.   "I need a better system to hack the Watchers Council from so we can find their weapons stashes."

"JD," Chris ordered.   "Watch her."

"You beg yet?" Buck asked her.

"Twice.   I was trying to make Xander happier.   Dean makes him happy."

"Dean's straight.   He's hit on every pretty girl in every place they've stopped for gas," Buck told her.   "Even if they do, you breaking his leg won't make him want the boy more."   She blushed, looking down.   He looked at the amused looking Sheriff.   "She made Dean's car bite him."

"We heard."   He pointed behind him.   "We confiscated their weapons, guys.   They had a few good things to kill Harris and his friends so they could take Izzy to train as one of them."   Chris snarled at that.   "Their dirty Fed is NCIS but he's back in another cell.   We had to separate them before they killed the guy.   He claims he has a warrant but we couldn't find it in his truck.   We did find a sniper rifle.   We did find wire tapping equipment and an anti-jammer to try to break what Xander has."

"Won't work, it's partially magical," Willow said, getting to work hacking them.   "Do we just need the US apocalypse vaults or do we need everything in the US?   Do we need to know what they have overseas?"

"Please," Chris agreed.   "The time of secret societies like theirs is over."   She nodded.   He pointed, looking at Buck.

"That's Rosenburg, Chris."   That got a nod.   "Who had done something to the Impala so it broke Dean's leg last night."

"Charming."   He sneered at her.   "Hurry up."

"I'm being good.   Really."

"I don't care," Chris told her.   She sighed but went back to hacking.   Tara walked in, giving him a short hug.   "Tara."

She smiled.   "She's under punishment with some witches," she said quietly, glancing around.   "They're saying she has to come back."

Chris shook his head.   "After we debrief her on this."

"That's fine but I'm to watch her.   Xander called her to deal with the Council before he blew them up for coming near Izzy."

"Can he?" Vin asked.

She nodded.   Willow nodded faster.   "Oh, yeah.    Xander's temper is much worse since he had Izzy.   That's why Riley went to him to talk about their plan on how to shut down Sunnydale since Cleveland is getting worse."   She glanced up.   "He made a plan during a mood swing."   She went back to her hacking.   "There we are, baby."   She looked at JD.   "Will they need their funds?"

"Leave it," Tara snapped.   Willow pouted but nodded.   "That's mean and the potentials will need upkeep money."

"How many potentials are there?" Ezra asked.

Tara shrugged but Willow looked.   "Fifty-seven at the moment down to six months of age in their care.   They think there's another four."   She looked up.   "All over the world."   She printed that sheet then the weapons lists and emergency caches.   "This is what they have listed but I'm not sure it's right since another file came up with another listing that's not on here."   Chris took it to look at.   She got into another file.   "Yeah, that's a fake."   He balled it up and she printed off the new file.   "Supply lists."   She handed it over once it came off the printer.   He gaped then moaned, letting Buck see it.   "Also."   She printed off another file.   "They decided to take out a family to get their potential slayer."   She handed it over. "They weren't willing and the council wanted her badly."

"I can see that."   He looked it over until an uptight suit walked in.   "Who are you, beyond FBI?"

"Who're you?"

"ATF, Team Seven out of the Denver office," Chris said.   "You're...."

"Perkins, local FBI.   We have a dirty agent?"

"Dirty to the same people who sent a hit team after a year-old toddler," Willow said.   "Ever hear of the Watcher's Council?"

He sneered.   "On some crank sites."

"They want my friend's baby girl.   It's their team and they're the ones that other agent is dirty to."

"Charming!"

"We have their lists of supply locations, and that they have eliminated a family to get their child to train," Chris offered.

"Why are you guys involved?"

"We had a guy who used to collect weapons up here.   The new guy who owns the house now has been working with us to clean up his little mining problem around his lawn.   Same guy," Buck told him.   "He had the dirty one tied over top of one of them from what I heard."   The Sheriff nodded.   "We like the boy but he's insanely defensive about his daughter," Buck offered.

"Putting it mildly," the sheriff agreed.   "He dragged in someone who wanted his daughter more than once.  He carried them in to put them on my desk in cuffs.   Then he walked off happier."

The FBI agent looked confused.   "Who is this guy?"

"His daughter is the one the cult arrested by the LA office is to," Vin said.   The agent looked that up, squeaking a bit.   "Yeah, that problem."

"So he's protective for a reason.   Good!"   He guessed.   "It lists her father as knowing weapons?"

Willow looked up with a smile.   "Hi, I'm Willow Rosenburg.   That's Xander Harris, both on Buffy's team out of Sunnydale."   That agent whimpered.   "Exactly.   Oh, we did hear that Sunnydale is weakening and fluxing but Cleveland is growing problems?   The Initiative guys have some way of measuring it."

"Aw, hell," the FBI agent muttered.   "And?   More bad news?"

"Their boss said if Cleveland opens fully and Sunnydale shuts, it's going.   Xander had mood swing plans they got from him."

"Sure," he decided, nodding some.   "Is he helping?"

"He's not going to do anything that might injure his daughter."

"Even better.   Think we can keep him here?"

"If you can find some way to let him support them both," Willow said.   "And he'll still probably help the other sort of hunters."

The FBI agent coughed.   "I know that name as someone who's ...found some things?"

"We get most of the heavier things," Chris told him.   "He likes us."

"Izzy makes him smile," Buck agreed, getting a dirty look.   "She does."

"She's a cute little girl."

"Everyone says that," the Sheriff agreed.   "Even the ones around here that don't like kids."   He looked at the Fed.   "I like the Harris boy.   He keeps to himself.   Doesn't cause troubles.   If we have some we can lean on him for things like fugitive hunts.   He'll bend over backwards to not appear to be collecting anything harmful.   He gave us a map of the mines."

"I detonated all the old ones," Willow admitted.

"That's fine," Chris agreed.   "We'll pick up the remains and check this spring."

"Not the new ones," she said, looking at him.   "Those are harder to set off."

"We figured they were," Vin agreed.   "Boy seems to know what to do about things."

"John's taught him how to deal with things their way too," Willow said calmly.   "He'll help their sort."   That got a nod.   "Maybe he'll be a good researcher for them."

Xander strolled in with Izzy and John behind him.   Everyone stared at him.   "What?   I figured I'd have some paperwork to sign.   Statements and those things."

"There are," the deputy said.   "C'mere, Xander."   He came over to look over the report and sign his statement.   Xander added some, letting him nod at those before he printed and signed it.   "Thank you.   Dean all right?"

"Big, heavy cast that Izzy pets for him if he's not paying attention to her.   He's not mobile enough to guard her right now so we had to bring her."

That got a smile.   "She's a loving little hellion."

Xander nodded.   "Yes she will be."   That got a few laughs.

Izzy was staring at the agents, then giggled and grabbed JD's hat to try to put on.   He scowled.   She just laughed and waved her free hand.   He put it on her head for her.   "She looks better in it than you do," Buck teased.

"She's a beautiful girl who'll look good in most anything."

Xander looked over.   "I'll have a lot of fun threatening her boyfriends," he agreed, cracking Buck and Ezra up.

"We'll feed you sedatives before her first date," John told him.   "Is he in trouble?"

Chris shook his head.   "For protecting his house and family?   Even if they tried, he could claim self defense and this state will protect him for that."   The sheriff nodded.   "You guys?"

"If you guys don't, I don't."

"Thanks," Xander said with a grin.

"If I find more than a shotgun out there...."

"They're hidden."

"Good."

"Though, the demons in LA have been wanting us to visit again."   He grinned.   "And the cult has a few people who're about to get out on parole."   They shuddered.   "They wanted us there for the parole hearings."

Chris looked at him.   "If you go on another nest raiding mission, you're handing it over, kid."

"Of course.   Anything too big?"

Chris looked at him.   "Don't you have enough?"

"Wouldn't that depend on what the next apocalypse is?"

"Any idea what it is or in which city?" Buck asked.

Xander shook his head.   "No one tells me anything.   I can call LA, see if Wes has something."

"We should probably hear from one of the sources," Buck said.   "Got their number right off?"

Willow wrote it out and held it up.   "To Cordy's phone and she wants to be an actress so it's on her."

"Thank you," Buck said, taking it outside.   "Miss Chase, Bucklin ...   Yes, him.   Xander told you?"   He smiled.   "We are.   The Watchers just tried to get in to get the baby.   We're arresting them but Xander said he had to come out there for parole hearings of some cult members and suggested we all need to hear which town the new apocalypse is in and how bad it'll be?"   He listened.   "No idea yet?   It's nearly Christmas."   He smiled.   "I can do that.   Probably soon.   Yes, they tried very hard but Xander did win and got them down."

Chris came out to take the phone.   "Chase, we need to know which town it's in and how bad it'll be as soon as possible.   Cleveland is a real city and if we have to evacuate it'll take weeks."   He nodded.   "I can do that.   This is Buck's cellphone and he does know about some of the hunting things.   Please do include us in that loop.   ATF actually.   Yes, the ones taking the mines out of Xander's yard," he said dryly.   "She's inside.   I'm sure you'll see her soon.   Parole hearings.   I'll let him know he should have warned you sooner."   He smirked at the snarky comeback.   He could appreciate a woman with a mouth like that.   As long as she wasn't under his command.   "Please do.   Thank you."   He hung up.   "Let her take something for her headache and she'll ask Wesley."   He walked back inside.   "She said you should've already warned her."

"I was going to warn them the day before so she could coo at Cordy and make her coo back."

"She's definitely got a mouth on her."

"Oh, yeah," Xander sighed.   "And I used to date that."   He shook his head.   Izzy squealed and hugged him.   "Thanks, baby girl.   Some day I'll pick you a wonderful stepmommy who'll love you and make you into a girly girl like Dawn."

"You could take Dean," Willow offered.   Xander turned and threw something at her head, making her squeal and duck.    "Sorry!"

"Going to be," Xander agreed.   "Because otherwise my temper is still high and then Dean gets you, Willow."

"Xander, calm down," John said patiently.   "Dean gets her first and then you."

Sam stomped in and paused.   "What the hell happened?" he demanded.

Xander grinned and handed over the baby since she was squealing and reaching for him.   "Watcher's Council wanted her.   Pity.   Willow was trying to set me up with Dean and that's why she possessed the Impala and broke his leg."

Sam opened his mouth then closed it and looked at his daughter.   He kissed her on the head and handed her to Buck then walked over to Willow, hauling her up.   "Give us ten minutes please?"

"Let her finish hacking," Chris ordered.   "Then we'll beat her ass."

"There's no we," he said with a tense smile.   "First my daughter then my brother."

"She prepped him so Dean could knock him up too," John said.   He was enjoying the hell out of his son's temper tantrum.   He stole his granddaughter back though.

"Ten minutes?" Sam asked Chris.   Chris took Willow back and put her back into the chair she had been in.   "Fine," he muttered.   "How is Dean?"

"Cast, small concussion," Xander told him.   "The car ran him over."

Sam nodded once and Buck leaned on his shoulder.   Sam looked at him.   "Comfy?"

"Holding you down until she's done.   Then you two can go talk in the snow."

"Sure, we can do that.   Is the house secure?"

"Dean's got a shotgun.   The Council's idiots are all here.   As far as we know."

Xander looked at him.   "Sheriff, has anyone heard a mine go off?" he asked him.

"Let me call Philip."   He did that.   "Philip, Sheriff Jenkins.   Someone tried to invade the Harris place to get his daughter.   I need to know if you hear any of the mines going off.   Sure, thanks, Philip.   Here at the moment.   Dean's back there with a shotgun in case but his leg is broken."   He laughed.   "That's fine.   Let me know if you do.   Yeah, that one was sanctioned. A friend took out all the ones Kyle left that the ATF didn't.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "He hasn't heard one yet but if he does he'll call."

"Sure," Xander agreed.   "That'll work."   Willow printed off other stuff then suddenly disappeared.

Sam looked up.   "That won't save you.   I have a passport too.   I will get you, Rosenburg, and your little black heart too!"

"Way to channel the Wiz," JD teased.

Sam grinned.   "And then I'll go mediaeval on her ass."   Chris laughed.   He took his daughter back, nuzzling her cheek.   "Love you, Izzy.   You can keep Daddy calm."   He walked off with her.   They could get an iced coffee in the winter.   She'd like the whipped cream.

Tara looked at Xander.   "I thought you were mad."

"You have no idea, but he doesn't usually have the bad temper that way," John admitted.   Tara shook her head and went to follow her girlfriend so *she* could finish beating her ass.  That way she wouldn't lose out to Sam's temper.

Sam came back with her, her whipped cream mustache, and his coffee.   "Now what?"

"Can I talk to them?" Xander asked nicely.   "Since Sam's got the baby?"

"Hell no," Chris said dryly.   "It's wrong to torture people in police or federal custody."

"Go home.   We'll come out to talk soon," Vin ordered.   Xander snarled but nodded, heading out to the truck.   John nodded politely and followed.

Sam followed too since he had a rental.   "Am I driving her?"

"Her seat's in the truck," John told him.   He took his granddaughter but Xander snatched her and put her into her seat, licking off some of the whipped cream to make her giggle.

"I'd share," Sam offered.

"Why?   She needed cleaned off anyway, Sam."   He finished checking her over then slid into his own seatbelt.   She smiled at him.   John got in shaking his head.   Sam went to his rental car.   Xander looked at John.   "Why can't I kick their ass?"

"They're in official custody.   If there's more, kick their ass before turning them over."

"The state boys got there before I could do more than mentally screw with them."

"Sorry.   Next time we won't call as quickly."

"Eeh, it happens."

John shook his head but he was smiling.   "You're an original, kid."

"I could be twins or triplets."

"Please don't.   There might be a wish demon listening."

"Fine."   He grinned.   "You know, she'll get a crack ho plan again sometime.   Do you want a grandson or a granddaughter next time?"

"Don't even think about it."

"I'm not but she tried and she might try again.   Or some other chaos witch.   Or even Ethan or Giles if he goes back to bad magic."

"Shut up, Xander."

"Fine.   Sorry."

"I'd like a list of all of them so I can go hunt them down."

"There's over a thousand chaos people according to the Watchers Council."

John whimpered.   "How many are powerful enough to do that?"

"She primed the spell.   We need to ask someone like Lorne when I'm back there for the hearings."

"Please do."

"Sure, I can do that."   He looked down.   "Awww, her nap time.   That's good."   John laughed.   "She's been a holy terror wanting to baby Dean for having a booboo."

"That's because you're doing good with her."

"Thank you."

"If I had to have a granddaughter, she's a good one to have."

"Yeah, I didn't want kids but she's pretty decent."   John smiled.   "I still need to find her a stepmommy."

"It's not easy to date when you're a single parent but you never know."   He pulled up to the gate, pressing the intercom button twice before opening the gate and driving in.   "I told Dean I'd do that so he won't shoot us."

"That's fine."   He shifted to look at her.   "John, veer right."   He did that.   "Thanks.   One of them isn't exploded and wasn't on the map."   The truck stopped and Xander got out, throwing a clump of icy snow at the mine.   It went off and he called the Sheriff.   "That was me.   One wasn't on the map."   He hung up and walked up to the house once Sam had pulled through.   They found Dean making coffee.   "She's had some."

"I saw the traces of whipped cream," he said dryly.   Sam grinned, giving him a hug.   "I'm fine, bitch, but your daughter is fussier than Tara is."

"Tara's a good role model for her," Sam said.   "And you're still being a jerk, jackass."

"If you two teach her to swear you'll be teaching her not to swear afterward," Xander said patiently.

Izzy woke up and yawned, smiling and waving at the adults.   "Hi!"

"Hi," Dean said with a grin.   "When did you learn that word?"

"Don't know," Xander admitted.   "Unless she learned it from one of the ladies at the store.  They all say hi."

"Hi!" she said, smiling and waving at him.

"Hi," he said, smiling and waving back.   "You're so silly."   He took her to cuddle.   Sam stole her.   "Hey!"

"Shut up."   He grinned at her.   "Let's let the daddy read to you.   Would you like a story?"   She pulled on his ears but was babbling at him as he walked her down to her room to find a book.

Dean shook his head.   "He's fussier than Tara.   That's where she gets it from."   Xander snickered.   "The illusions are off?"

"Oops."   Xander went to fix that.   "Thanks for the warning."

"Welcome."   He looked at his father.   "So, she did what?"

"She wanted you two to get together.   This was the Rosenburg version of matchmaking and hoping for new nieces or nephews."

"Uh-huh."   He nodded once.   "She dead yet?"

"Sammy wanted to but she disappeared."

"Damn.   Well, we'll see her eventually."   He took a sip of his coffee.   "Need some, Dad?"

"Please."

"Crap!" Sam shouted.   He came out.   "Xander, Izzy's roof is leaking.   A branch beat it."

"Hell."   He came up from the basement with a tarp.   "I need someone to help me hold the ladder."

"I can.   I've still got on my boots," John offered, following him outside once he had on his gear.    Xander climbed up to tack down the tarp.   "How bad is it?"

"Very."   He looked down.   "I don't want to replace a roof during a snow storm."

"It's supposed to be clear but a bit chilly for the next few days.   How long will it take?"

Sam came out to look up at them.   "How bad?"

"Very.   We've got three holes.   Dean's going to need my trundle again."   He looked over at him.   "Can you call the hardware store and tell them I need some roofing stuff asap?   If Buck's still in town see if they can bring it up?   The credit card's in the fridge."

"I can," he agreed, going to look up the number to do that.   He came out a minute later.   "I made sure with Buck.   He said that's fine.   Do you need nails?"

"Yeah, I've got an auto nailer.   It's a full scale model."   Sam went inside to say that.   Xander shook his head.   "This is going to suck."

"A lot," John agreed.   "But I can help and so can Sammy probably."

"Thanks."   He came down.   "Dean's probably got a damp bed or floor.   Izzy's got a damp area.   The back storage area has one too."   They went inside and Xander went to find his tools.   He came out with them, taking the extra gloves to put on under his.   "Thanks."   He headed back out there to get things ready.   Buck and Chris pulled up and he went down to get what he needed first.   "Thanks, guys.   Izzy and Dean both have damp rooms and so does the storage area."   He went back up and got to work on prying up the old shingles.   Buck came up.   "I can do this.   You don't have to freeze, Buck."

"I'm carrying more of the shingles up."

"Thanks."   He took them and put them under the tarp.   "This is going to take me a while.  Call me in for regular coffee breaks?"

"Sure.   Want more help?"

"It's nearly dark.   Let me get on with this part and I'll be in soon."

"Sure."   He went inside.   "He said to call him in for frequent coffee breaks."   John went up to help him.   "He didn't let me."

"It's nearly dark.   He'll never get finished with the area of Izzy's room by then."

"Izzy can sleep with me," Dean offered.   "Or with Sammy in the other room, Dad."

"You'll be on the trundle," John reminded him.   They went up to help Xander pry off the old and put on the new.   "Under boards?"

"Still mostly okay.   I'll replace the ones that're bad.   The one over Izzy's room looks like a gap."   John nodded, coming over to help put down the insulating tar paper.   "I can."

"Shut up, kid."

"Fine."   They got back to work.   It was going to be a long night.   Xander looked up then at them.   "It looks like it'll snow again tomorrow."

"It's supposed to be clear up here, but snow down toward us," Buck said.   Xander grimaced but worked faster.   "Do we have another nailer?"

"Check my toolbox.   I might have a smaller one."

"Chris, check the toolbox for another nailer," Buck yelled.   It got brought up by Sam, who came to help pry off the old shingles ahead of where they were working.   It was damn cold out there and they needed to get on with this.   The house would leak energy like a sieve tonight if they didn't get it mostly fixed.   John rigged the tarp over them for some extra protection from the cold wind.   "Thanks," Buck said quietly.

"Thanks," Xander agreed.   Sam just grinned.   They got back to the main part of the roof.  The storage areas could wait but over the main living areas had to be done.   They got done with half of it before it got too dark.   They tied down the tarp over the rest and headed back inside.   "Okay, the front is retarred and shingled.   The back isn't."

"That's fine," Dean agreed.   "My room?"

"Is going to be cold and wet but there's a tarp over it," John told him.   "Take the trundle, son."

"Not the first time."   He looked at Izzy.    "Are you napping with me?"

She waved and went back to nibbling on the cookie JD had let her steal from him.

Dean shook his head.   "We spoil you horribly, Izzy."   He went back to hopping in the kitchen but Ezra made him leave it alone.   "Fine."

Xander winced at the sound of a crack outside.    "Crap."   He opened the door to fluffy, big snowflakes.   He burst out laughing.   John looked and groaned.   "Guys, if you're going tonight, you might wanna head."

Chris looked over his shoulder.   "It might already be too late.   I can't see our tracks."

"Shit," Xander said, slamming the door.   He grinned at him.   "So."   He shook his head.   "At least we have cable if the dish is working."

Chris laughed.   "It might go out in that mess."

Xander sighed, looking around.   "Beds are going to be an issue then.   Dean, you're sleeping on my bed.   Sam, you and Izzy take the trundle.   John, the camping gear is in the storage area, can you check it for me?"   John nodded, going that way with Chris.   "There's the roll away in Izzy's closet.   Dean, is your bed soaked?"

"Pretty damp but I flipped the mattress.   Izzy's crib is very damp."

"The roll away?"

"Fine.   Was in the closet," Sam offered.   "You have that other one in the attic.   Dean and I slept on it a few times."   He went up to check on it, bringing it down.   "It's a thin mattress but it's not that uncomfortable, guys."

"That takes care of half of you guys.   Unless you guys wanna shack up double in Dean's bed.   Then that'll leave one person without a bed."   He hit himself on the head, going down to the storage area, coming back with the air mattress.   "Some of my camping gear.   The sheets will fit it."   They set them up in the spare rooms.   John got a guest.   Chris and Vin took Dean's former bed.   Ezra tested the beds and took the roll away in the nursery.   JD and Buck got the rest of the camping gear on the couches.   Thankfully Nathan had stayed back at the office.   Josiah was trying to help the cleaning up in the kitchen at the moment.   Xander walked in there.   "Who's cooking?"

"What do we have to cook?"

Xander waved a hand.   "And down in the basement in the barrels and the pantry, dude."   He went to look, coming back with a hopeful look as he looked in the freezer.   "The venison in the freezer is pretty fresh.   Since thanksgiving they both stepped on mines."

"I can bread the cutlets to make medallions.   There's plenty of potatoes and other supplies."

"I did try," Xander offered.

"You did pretty good, kid."   He patted him on the shoulder.   "Let me see what Ezra and I can cook up."

"Okay.   Oh, there's some canned stuff this way.   Some honey and milk powder above the water heater to feed the brownies in the woods, and I think there's another case of soda and another can of coffee under the sink."

"Xander, the brownie on the back porch said this storm isn't natural," Buck called.

Xander went to make him a meal, coming out to put it in front of him.   "Witch related?"   He nodded.   "I'll beat her ass myself."   The brownie laughed, taking the stuff.   "Sorry about the lack of bread but we're out unless someone can thaw and bake a frozen loaf."

"That's fine.   It's not half as bad nearer to town."

"I'll gut her later on."   The brownie smiled.   "Thank you for letting me know.   Need more?"

"No, this is good, lad."   He walked off with it, disappearing into the snow.

Xander walked inside to call Buffy's phone.   "It's me.   Is Willow within smacking distance?   Playing with the weather to strand me, all three Winchesters, the baby, and six of the seven ATF agents we've been working on the mine issue with.   Fortunately I have food stored but there's a hole in the roof we have to fix tomorrow.   Even if it is snowing."   He moaned.   "Yeah, the brownie said it was.   No, not mini girl scout, Buffy.   Ask Giles about them."   She did that.   "Well, Sam wanted to kill her for hurting Dean.   I wanted to hurt her for hurting Dean to give us time so we'd fall into bed together.   And now the ATF team is up here too.   So, can you send her back so we can beat her ass?"

Sam snatched the phone, handing him the baby.   "Buffy, Sam.   How long before I can kick her butt?"   He listened to her complain.   "Yay."   He smiled.   "Exactly.   So we'll have a shitload of fun when we get back there for parole hearings?   Yeah, please do have him told.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "She'll warn Epps we're stranded here in the snow."

"That's fine.   Josiah said he'd cook with Ezra."

Ezra came in to clean up and see what they had.   "Did we decide to stock our supplies in case the world goes dark after this next apocalypse?" he asked dryly.

"I didn't know how long we'd be snowed in.   Besides, the major ones come in the spring anyway."   He grinned and walked off.   "Thanks, guys.   Gotta figure out how to finish the roof in the snow."   The wind picked up and he winced.   "Yeah, she's pissed.   Oh well."   He sighed, going to see if the dish worked.   It didn't, of course.   His DSL line did.   "Internet still works."   Chris came in to write Nathan so he could spread the news.   Someone was going to get Rosenburg even if one of them had to fly to England.

***

Buffy knocked on the door, smiling at the old man that answered.   "Is Don here?   I have a message from Xander for him."

"He's eating dinner.   Do we know you, miss?"

"I'm Buffy.   He helped my buddy Xander with that cult thing and he's due in soon for some parole hearings, but he's kinda snowed in thanks to Willow."

Don came to the door frowning.   "What, Buffy?"

"Willow hurt Dean intentionally to keep them together hoping that Xander would hit on Dean."   Don moaned, shaking his head and moving outside.   "And then today the Watchers Council showed up today to steal Izzy.   They're very sorry but whole because the State Troopers got there before Xander could finish showing them why they're idiots."

"Are they all right?"

"They're fine.   Well, Xander, Izzy, and them are probably fine.   They were earlier when Willow hacked the Council to get the ATF team that helps him with those lawn mines information."   He nodded slowly.   "And they caught a dirty Fed.   So they're dealing with that."   That got another nod.   "But Willow's still on her kick and hiding in town at the Hyperion because she decided to give them more time together.   So now Xander has him, Izzy, three Winchesters, six ATF agents, and a load of blizzard with a hole in the roof they're working on right now.   He wanted you to know that he might not be able to get in for the parole hearings.    I'm just kinda hoping the dish is still working because Tara nearly went insane before it went up.   That many guys.... they're going to end up drinking or doing stupid stuff."

He groaned.   "I can let the DA's office know about that.   How long before you beat her enough to make her stop the storm?"

"I'm keeping my temper by spreading this message.   Cordy has her to chew her a new one.  Because she kinda possessed Dean's car and had it bash into his leg to break it the other night."

"She needs beaten."

"I know.   Mom's going to later and Sam vowed to kill her since she primed the spell to get Xander pregnant again.   No baby yet but she started it.   Thankfully it's not attached to anything even if he can't remove it or it'll make Izzy sick."

"Wonderful.   I'll let them know.   You go beat her.   I'm sure that goes against many ethical rules for her kind."

"Yeah but the demons are happy.   Xander was going to come raid some nests."

"I'm sure he still will."   She grinned.   "Go beat her.   Xander doesn't need this stress."

"We're taking bets about how long it'll be before the agents need mental help."

"If they know Xander, probably a while."

"I don't know, Willow said she's like this because he warped her."

Don looked into the house.   "Save me some.   I'll be back."   He grabbed stuff and took her back to the Hyperion.   He walked in with her and went to where he could hear Cordelia yelling.   He nodded at Buffy's mother.   He had kept subtle track of what they were doing in case it endangered his city again.  Joyce seemed to be the most sensible of the whole group, though he did think Spike was very original but also had a good set of skills for the job they did.   He hauled Willow up, looking at Joyce.   "Do you want her first?"

"I can't keep myself from killing her."

"I can."   He sat down and put her over his knee, no matter how much she struggled, and spanked her until she begged for mercy.   Then Joyce took over for him.   He called the DA's office on the way home to tell them what was going on.   They agreed it was unavoidable and they'd try to call to get a statement from him.   That had felt a bit too good but she clearly needed it.

The head of the Devon coven appeared, looking at the sobbing witch.   She looked at Tara.   "You?"

"An FBI agent who helped Xander with the cult to Isabelle," she said quietly.   "And Joyce.   I'm still too mad."

"Good.   Then it's our turn.   Rupert?"   He walked in with his drink.   She took it from him, handing it to Joyce.   "Come along, Rupert.   She's your student. Even if she does seem like Ethan's."   They took her with them.   Tara went too.   They really wanted to teach her not to do such things.   Before they had to kill her for it.

***

Xander ran into Dean and flipped back quickly, mumbling a 'sorry' at his sleeping body.   He hugged his daughter, making her snuggle in better.   It was chilly as hell in the house thanks to the roof.

Dean snuggled against his back, one arm going over his waist.   "Cold," he murmured.

Xander made sure he had some of the blankets and let himself be held.   Not like he could make Dean get off without hurting his leg.

Sam sat up.   "Wiggle some and he'll let go," he whispered.   "He did it to me when we were younger."

"He's cool."

"Want me to take Izzy?"

"She's warm."

"Okay."   He laid back down, getting comfortable again.   He smiled because they did look good against each other.   Maybe they could work out something for stress relief at least.   He heard Izzy snuffle and got up to grab her since Xander was so comfortable.   He changed her in the bathroom then brought her back.   The loose diaper was a bad sign but it could've been dinner not agreeing with her.   She had nibbled from everyone's plate, even from Buck's hot sauce laden potatoes.   She had charmed everyone into being her willing feeding slaves.   Some day his daughter was going to break hearts and make men beg. Maybe it had been the succubus Xander had played with while pregnant?   No, they hadn't found any taint.   She was just naturally adorable.   Dean flipped over and Izzy wiggled so Xander let her pick her own position.   She decided to get between them to cuddle her uncle for a bit.

Dean woke up and blinked down at her.   "Comfy, Izzy?" he asked quietly.

"Apparently," Xander agreed.   He flipped over and Dean realized he had been cuddling.   "It's cool, Dean.   It's a natural impulse.   That's why you're behind me or you'd be cuddled to death."

"If you're sure."

"Yup."   He listened.   "The wind's died."

"Good.   Maybe it quit snowing."

"Nope," Sam said, sitting up again. "I checked when I changed her.   By the way, the hot sauce she liked didn't like her."

"Figures," Dean agreed.   He looked down at her.   "I don't know how you're so adorable when both of your fathers are badasses."

"Thanks," Sam said with a grin.

"I taught you.   Of course you are," Dean quipped back.   Sam swatted him, getting a fussy noise from Izzy.   "Let's go back to sleep, guys."   Xander shifted and curled up again.   Dean made sure he had some of the blankets too.   Xander gave him an odd look over his shoulder.   "You weren't covered."   He shifted back so Izzy and he had some room.   "Now you're not hanging off."   Xander shifted back carefully then curled up again.   They all settled in.   It was good to sleep.

***

Xander woke up in the morning with Izzy against his back, Dean against his front somehow, and Sam whimpering on the trundle.   Xander carefully wiggled his way out, letting Dean have Izzy.   He went to the bathroom, grabbing some clothes on the way.   A quick shower, dressing, then out to the living room.   Buck was snoring.   JD woke up some but Xander waved him back so he went back to sleep.   Xander started some coffee so he could take some outside with him.   His hat and gloves were quickly found and his insulated mug too.   He snuck out to the porch to put on the final heavy things, letting him sneak up to work on the roof again.   He took a drink then got to work checking over last night's last few shingles.   He pried off a few more rows then got back to work on them.   He kept it as quiet as he could.   He didn't want to wake anyone else up.   Even if he had woken up nuzzling Dean's chest.

***

Chris woke up with a snort, looking up at the roof.   "He needs insulation."

"There is some," Vin mumbled.   "But it's old fiberglass and paper."

"He's up working on the roof."

"Probably some gay panic."

"No, he's not like that," Chris said.   "He's too open for that.   Dean probably cuddled too much."   He got up and went to shower before the others needed the bathroom.   He saved Vin some hot water.   Buck and JD wouldn't be up for a bit.   Ezra would take an act of God to get up this early.   Josiah was already up and in the kitchen.   "He up there by himself?"

"Snuck out after letting the adorable minx in there have her uncle's chest to nibble on."   Chris grunted but he smiled behind his coffee cup.   "They'll need more guns to shoo the boys off."

"They should start in daycare," Vin said, coming out to get some coffee before hitting the shower.   He looked in the nursery then snickered quietly.   Chris and Josiah went to look, both laughing at the way Isabelle was trying to wake Ezra since she had a book.   "Darlin', he won't wake up for hours.   Want one of us to read to you?" he asked quietly.

She pouted at him.   "No!   Him!"   She climbed up to sit on Ezra's stomach, cooing when he grunted in displeasure.   "EzEz!" she squealed loudly.   "EzEz!"   She rocked and giggled, getting up to bounce on him.   He caught her the second time.   "EzEz!" she said happily, leaning down to kiss him on the forehead.   "EzEz!"    He blinked at her.   "Bobo?"

He blinked at her.   "What?"

"She found a book and wouldn't let us take her and it," Chris said, walking off grinning.   She was going to drive him nuts having him read to her.

Sam woke up and came out looking alarmed.

"She woke up Ez to read to her," Vin said, closing the bathroom door so he could shower.    Because he remembered her trying to help a few times he had been there before.

Sam walked into the nursery.   "Isabelle, why didn't you wake me?   I'd read to you."   She scowled at him and swatted.   "Hey, behave."

"She's fine," Ezra said quietly.   "She obviously has taste in the voices that read and educate her."

"It's still rude."

"She's fine, Samuel.   Go make her breakfast?"   Sam went to put on more clothes then do that.   He looked at her.   "You do have very good taste in asking me to read, young lady.   I'm excellent at it and your fragile little cranium will be expanded as much as I can while we're stranded in this forsaken camp up here.   Though your aunt does have good taste in who could tame your father."   She smiled at him and patted his nose.   "Fine, we'll go back to the story."   He went back to reading to her.

Sam came in a few minutes later, holding out his hands.   "Want some eggies and potatoes?"   She pouted at him, patting Ezra again.   "Food then more stories.   Let him get up and clean up, then he can come read to you some more."   He grabbed her, tossing her up to make her giggle.   "C'mon, let's go eat."   He walked her out even though she did beg.  "Sorry, Ezra."

"She's no bother.   It's important to get young minds open and useable so they don't end up tragically stunted."   He got up and went to the bathroom then went back to bed.   It was still ungodfully early by his standards.   He would wake up again at a better hour.   Or she'd come back to let him educate her some more after she ate.

Dean stumbled out to the kitchen, looking at his messy daughter.   "What are you eating?"

"Fried potatoes," Sam said.

"Greasy," Dean complained.

"Not that bad," Sam countered.   "I'll bathe her after everyone else is done and the water heater is recharged."

"Fine."   He sat down to kiss her on the head and grabbed some of his food from the bowls on the table.   "Thanks for cooking, Sammy."

"Welcome.   Josiah started it but I needed to get her away from waking Ezra up."

Dean hummed since his mouth was full, looking at his niece.   "I'll read to you."   She beamed.   "Where's your mother?"   She pointed outside.   "Roof?"   Sam nodded.   Chris did too.   "Let me get dressed and I'll go help."

"I think maybe someone cuddled too much," Chris said.

"Why?   He didn't mind it earlier."

Vin gaped.   "Really?"

"Really.   He said he didn't care."   He shrugged.   "We all woke up last night."   He finished up and went to shower and change, blow drying his hair before going outside.   "Hey, Xander, need help yet?"

"Could yeah.   Thanks, Dean."

"Welcome."   He made it up the ladder with some careful moving, looking at the lawn.   "The snow is too deep to get out."

"Someone needs to adjust the dish too.   It's crooked," Xander said quietly.

"We can do that when we're over that way."   He got under the tarp to help him.   "That's looking better."   They got back to work.   "Insulation inside?   It was way too cold last night."

"Some of it's old papers he used to pad the fiberglass insulation.   If I had the stuff I'd use blown insulation but I don't and I don't think we'll be digging out today."

"Probably not."   He glanced out then at him again.   "She was clearly in a pissy mood."

"That's because she knows that she'll be beaten to death for this stunt," he said dryly.

"So why sneak out?"

"I was awake.   It needed to be done."

"So it wasn't cuddling?"

"Not yours."   Xander blushed, looking at him sideways.   "I woke up nuzzling.   Sorry."

"It happens.   I'm an amazing specimen so of course you wanted to touch and nuzzle."

"And modest too," Xander joked back.

"It's hard but I gotta keep my modesty and head somehow."

Xander laughed.   "You're so bad."

"Thank you.   Izzy's having fried potatoes all over her hair and face."

"Does she still have baby soap?"

Dean thought back.   "Some.   It'll last all week.   You have extra in the closet and some of it's gentle enough for her."

"Good.   I didn't want her to stink and be greasy.   Some of the older ladies are giving us odd looks for me being a single daddy.   They said it'd be more reasonable if I was female but since I'm not..."

"Social worker?"

"One.   She came out with the deputy.   She was very impressed and said I was doing fine.   It was screwy mental problems that couldn't give equal opportunity for being a single parent.   She did ask me about any plans I had for dating.   I said if I found another one that wasn't evil but still snarky and a bit wicked, then I'd gladly date as long as they weren't a danger to my daughter.   She gave me an odd look so I told her about Cordy.   She was impressed she let me live."   Dean snickered.   "Yeah.   So we're supposedly looking but there's no women in town who appeal to me."

"It happens in small towns."   He nailed in another panel of shingles.   "What are we doing about the insulation?"

"Too much more snow and it'll help with that according to what the sheriff said.

"Yeah but we had to scrape it off to do this."

Xander pointed up.   "We're due some anyway, Dean.   We need to call town to see how long it'll be before we're plowed from the gate down."

"Probably days if they got it as bad as we did.   How did you know about that mine?   Dad told me."

"Spot vision.   The truck was drifting and would've hit it."

"Good vision then."   Xander nodded.   "Headache?"

"That one was like an ice cream headache.   I've had worse with longer ones."

"Sammy gets horrible ones each and every vision."

"Cordy's is killing her," he said quietly.   Dean dropped the nailer.   Xander caught it and handed it back.   "Hers are gifted by the Powers, Dean.   They're too strong for a human."   Dean shuddered.   "Unless Sam's the same way?"

"Not that I know of.   We'll check by making them compare.   Anyone call LA?"

"Yeah, Buffy left a message on my phone.   She told Epps I might not make it for the parole hearings.   He kindly went to paddle Willow for us."

"Dad and Sammy will be too.   Their tempers are legendary among the hunters.   They used to argue and get into fist fights before Sammy went to college."

"That had to suck."

"Yup.   Especially since I was in the middle playing 'stop it before I shoot you both in the balls with rock salt'."   Xander chuckled at that.   "I told them that a few times.   It got old real fast."   Buck came up to join them.   "Hey, climb under.   We're doing okay."

"It looks like it."   He moved to help strip the shingles ahead, glancing back at the ground.   "It's going to be a miracle to get the truck cleared out."

"I didn't even think about buying a snow blower, just shovels," Xander admitted.   "Sorry."

"It's okay.   We can work on it.   Chris is calling the Sheriff to see when the road'll be done.  JD has plenty of extra energy so he can shovel for a bit."   That got a smile.   "How much longer do you think, Xander?"

"We're only doing the critical parts right now.   The main stripe that had ice damage and damage from that stupid tree limb.   The rest I'll get this spring and handle in about a week."   That got a nod.   "And I'll be adding to the insulation."   Dean nodded at that.    "I'm not sure how I can do that now without pulling the present stuff down and restuffing it."

"That's a good indoor job," Dean said.

"I'd have to have her with me and that's dangerous. I doubt I could get her to wear a mask."

"The beauty of naptime," Dean reminded him dryly.

"That's true.   I can probably get a good few feet done at naptime.   Sure.   Once we can get out again."   He heard the door open and John swear.   "If they want out, someone has to dig since I only got shovels, not a snow blower."

"That's going to be a lot of digging," Chris said.

"Yeah, but dig now or dig more later when the next fit of snow comes."

"Good point."   He went to check out the shovels.   "Wonder if we can rent a snowblower?   If they can plow the main road up to the gate, we can trudge out to meet it and then use it on the way back."   He went to find the phone book and call the local equipment rental place.   After he called to see when the main road would be plowed.   Because he liked the kid but he didn't want to be trapped with him.   And someone had to take care of the horses back on his farm.   Nathan would try but they'd ignore him.   Ezra came out.   "JD, go start shoveling out the truck?"

"Sure, Chris.   How deep is it?"

"Very.   It's up to the door handle on the windy side."   JD whimpered.   "I'm going to try to rent a snow blower for a few days, JD."

"Sure."

"This or the roof," Josiah offered.

"I like shoveling better then."   He went to do that with John's help.   Josiah came out once he was better dressed for the weather.

"I was thinking," Xander offered.   Dean gave him a horrified look.   "I do a lot of it.   Nothing else to do out here.   If I'm here next winter, maybe I should add on a garage out by the gate?   Maybe get a four-by-four to carry people up in the snow?"

"That could work," Buck agreed.   "Damn long hike though if the way up is up here."

"Good point.   I'll consider how to do this next year."

"Snow blower and a plow attachment for the front of the truck," Dean said simply.   Xander nodded at that. "I would've thought Kyle had one."

"He broke it his last year trying to use it to knock down trees," Buck told him.

"Oh.   No wonder."   He paused.   "Buck, didn't Kyle have an underground garage?"

"Um..."   He thought back.   "I don't know.   John?"

"Yeah," he called up.

"Didn't Kyle have an underground garage somewhere, Dad?" Dean called.   "We're hoping for a snow blower or something equally practical."

"I thought he did but I haven't seen the entrance to it yet."

"Maybe it's that funky closet sorta door in the lower pantry by the basement?" Xander offered.   Dean groaned and they went inside for a coffee break to check that out.   Xander showed it to him.   It was a small crawl hatch in the back of the closet.   It turned out to lead to one of the storage areas via the floor joists.   "Call Bobby?"

"Maybe."   He decided to do that.   "Hey, Bobby, it's Dean.   How do you get into Kyle's underground garage?   We're hoping for a snowblower.   That sudden storm?   Yeah, Rosenburg's idea of 'here, you should spend time with him so you two get together'," he mimicked.   Bobby apparently laughed.   "Don't do that.   Beyond that, we've been helping with the roof since a branch got it and some ice damage happened.   House is cold as hell right now.   Guys, firewood is in the box in the windowed porchy area out back."   They went to get it and start the fire.   Izzy pouted at that.   "Tough, I know you like cold but tough, Izzy."   He listened to Bobby.

"Buck said he broke it knocking down trees.   It's up to Chris's door handle, Bobby.   There's no way without a plow or a snowblower.   Probably both and still the shovels.   Can't.   I barely made it onto the roof to help with that with my broken leg.   Also thanks to Rosenburg's method of hooking me and Xander up."   He listened to the complaining and spluttering.   "Any idea, Bobby?"   He listened then followed the directions, finding the hidden door in the living room's storage closet.   "This leads...."   He nodded.   "So two hallways and one was a bolt hole in case demons and Feds came.   The other's the hidden garage?   I figure he had to.   He got out during the winter.   Thanks, man."   He hung up and tried the door, having to get Sam to pick it for him since he couldn't get into the position needed.   They walked down there, finding the bolthole first.

"Damn," Buck said.

"We can bring it back with us," Chris called.   He followed to check it out, blinking at the stuff packed up against all the walls.   "Survival supplies.   Water.   Camping gear."

"Pseudo-pillow top air mattress," Xander said.   He opened a box.   "Sex toys."   He closed it.   He'd seen enough of those from Anya.   He looked in a case and whimpered.   "Toy," he moaned.

"No," Chris said.   He looked in there and nearly said the same thing.   "How in the hell did he get that?"

Xander shrugged.   "No clue," he said, looking happier.   Dean groaned, heading for the other hallway, then turned back around to open the doorway he could kinda see the outline of up the hallway.   "What's that?" he called at the moan.

"Found Kyle's motorcycle."   He closed the door.   "Nice bike."   He headed for the other hall at a hop, wincing at the cold getting into his sore leg.   "This does suck."

"Pain pills are in the medicine cabinet," Xander said.   "Or the first aid kit."

Dean looked at him.   "Anything beyond aleeve?"

"Yeah, in my emergency kit for patrols."   Dean stared.   He shrugged.   "Being hit with your own stake hurts."   Chris got the other door open for them and nearly did a happy dance at the two snowblowers.   "Does it have gas?" Xander asked.

"Should," Dean said.   "Unless it evaporated."   He went to check, nodding.   "They do."   He looked at the door.   "I wonder where that comes out to."   He tried to open it but it was stuck.   He groaned, going to see if they could dig the door out.

"Hell, we'll carry one," Chris decided.   "Buck?"   He came in to help him carry one of the snowblowers upstairs and outside.   Yeah, he was desperate and he knew why the kid was going insane being stuck there for their own protection.   JD nearly whooped in pleasure.

John looked at it.   "That thing is cranky.   It likes to stall unless he fixed the engine."

"The other was heavier to carry up the stairs," Buck told him.

"Where does it come out at?" Chris asked.

"Underneath the back porch."   Xander moaned.   "What?"

"I thought that was a root cellar."

"Not the folding doors; that's a storm shelter.   He built the porch in front of the doorway to the older garage."    He went to look.   Yeah, it was covered.   He took the cranky snowblower back that way to free it so they could get the good one, finding one of the porch supports was up against the door.   Dean was trying to get it free from the inside.   "Why did he do that?   He knew better."

"Dad," Dean called.   "There's a second door it looks like.   Smaller though."   He tapped on it and John blew the snow away from it.   That one opened.   "We have a few things of gas in the survival supplies."   John went to get it while Dean checked over the other snow blower. Dean decided to be helpful by getting on the riding lawnmower and coming out to push the snow around with it.   John gave him a dirty look and pointed inside, making Dean sigh but go get warmer again.   John got the other one gassed up and handed it over to Chris since he wanted to leave so badly.

Chris handed it to JD.   "Do not scratch my truck."

"Of course not."   He went to work on that.   Josiah took the other one.   It was still a hell of a job, the driveway was nearly a mile long.   But they could get out by tomorrow hopefully.

"Look, the ground is brown!" Xander said, pointing at a bare spot.   "It's brown, Dean."

"You need to sleep more," Sam said with a grin.

"Just for that, come help with the roof if you want to be warm again."

"Coming."   He got on his boots and went up with him to work on the roof's problems.   "When did this happen?"

"It was fine a few weeks back when I had to get the tree branch off it but I guess it scratched something and let ice under the shingles."   That got a nod and they got back to work.   JD was getting all the area around the cars.   Just in case they had to get out in a hurry, like another trip to the ER.   Xander felt his stomach heave and groaned, sitting up to calm it down.

"Are you sure she only activated it?"

"The blood test said so."

"When did we have it done?"

"The same time Dean was getting x-rays since I had the flu all that week."

"Oh.   Ow."   He got back to work with a head shake.   "Dizzy?"

"Slightly."   He got back to work too.   It had to be done.   Before they froze to death or the furniture was ruined.   Since Joyce had picked out the crib, he wanted to keep it in case he became a grandfather.   Far, far in the future.   So far that Star Wars was a reality.   And he didn't mean the missile system either.

Sam felt Xander's forehead.   "Dad, come get him.   He's running a fever."

John came up and helped Xander down and inside, taking him to warm up and check.

"EzEz baba?" Izzy asked, watching them walk past where he was reading to her.

"If he wants to fix you a bottle ask him, sweetheart.   Daddy's feeling sick."

Tara appeared.   "She's very sorry, Xander."

Xander looked at him.   "I feel better for some reason."

She frowned, testing him, which made him run and puke.   "Huh."   She called the witches she had met fixing Willow's issues.   "Why would Xander be attuned to magic so much that it was making him sick?"   She listened then went to make him some of her tea while they figured that out.   "Thank you."   She walked in there and handed it over.   "Peppermint tea.   We're working on the rest."   She went to look in the library he had here.

John looked up.   "Kyle, if that's you doing it, leave the boy alone," he said quietly.   "He's like a younger version of Bobby with more weapons.   Tara's a good witch, the sort we could count on."   Xander got sick again.   Willow appeared.   "Please?" he muttered.   She steeped some herbs to bring to him.   John grabbed her before she could disappear again.   "We should talk."

"I'm sore."

"I don't care, young lady.   We still need to have a talk about ethics and why you don't do shit like that."   He walked her into a room and was going to shut the door but Chris came in to help, already glaring.   If she didn't learn this time, they'd burn her for the boy so he quit being plagued.

Tara helped Xander drink the herbs, getting him out to the couch for a bit.   She cast the checking charm again and he turned green.   She looked up.   "I know you're here, but he's keeping your place safe."   The ghost appeared, staring at her.   "They won't let him keep the bigger weapons."

"No, he can't," Ezra agreed.   "Unless he can hide them better magically."   He looked at the ghost.   "Really, he is trying but Chris is a bit forceful."

Buck came in and stared.   "Could've sworn you were salted and cremated."

"Cremation leaves chunks sometimes," Dean said from his seat.   Kyle looked at him so he waved.   "Xander's daughter is Sammy's too.   The witch being beaten to death by Dad merged the realms, Kyle.   Xander's a good weapons nut like you were only he's less paranoid.   He works on the fringes of the system and you know he hid most of it from them."   The ghost nodded.   Ezra scowled at him.   Dean grinned.   "You really thought you got all his babies?"

"No.   There was a high percentage of cannibalized equipment in that group."

"Uh-huh," Xander agreed.   "Kyle, look in the room with the magic books I'm keeping away from Willow," he said quietly.   The ghost faded out then came back to smile at him.   "Can you please leave me and Izzy alone?   I don't mind the mentoring but I've already sucked in a few spirits.   Since we can't fully unpossess me, it's not really going to be fun for either of us.   All I need is a safe place to raise my little girl until it's safer to go back to hunting for us.   Caleb gave me this place for some of my old stash."

"You could've been Kyle's son if you were from our realm," Dean said dryly.   "You've got the same instincts, only yours are from that Halloween possession.   You're both scary weapons sorts.   You've modified a few and so did he.   You can both go insane out here but manage to keep a little bit by fixing the place up."

"I do like how the mines keep giving us deer," Sam said as he came in.   He sighed and went to the kitchen.   "Rock salt, Dean?"

"He's not hurting anyone," he called back.   "He's making sure Xander's a proper heir."   He took another sip of his coffee.   "Really, Kyle, he could've been your kid."

Kyle got closer to the boy, feeling him flinch away from him.   "I won't."   He touched his head to feel him.   Then he nodded.   "A good heir.   Stay here and protect her while helping other hunters, Xander.   It's never safe to hunt."

"I was in Sunnydale before," he told him.   Kyle moaned.   "I might be reassigned to Cleveland if Sunnydale falls in."

"You've got to get her to undo the conception spell too."   Xander groaned.   "All you need is a bit of DNA and it's making you sick, boy."   He stared at him.   "There's plenty of things to hide around here.   And plenty I hid too.   Though, the roof, not totally that branch's fault.   I admit I screwed up sometimes and it's been years."

Xander grinned. "You were busy."

"Yeah.   You could've put the Feds in the bunker."

"Hey," Buck complained.   "Besides, we only found it earlier.   With the snow blowers."

"Not that one, the emergency bunker.   I had Bobby help me build it."   He floated that way, showing them where the door was.   "I designed this place to never be able to fully be taken over."

"I'm kinda thankful you left that money in the well since it's kept us eating this winter," Xander admitted, looking at the doorway.   He opened it and Buck moaned at the stairs.   "Is it under the garages?"   He nodded so they walked down together.   Xander flipped on the generator, finding a nice set of bunks around an entertainment center full of videos and DVD's.   There were more survival supplies and more blankets in the corner.   He ran a hand over the wall.   "Iron?"

"Salt coated so no spirits can get in when it's sealed."

Xander smiled.   "Let me guess, you were going to let some coeds move in and lurk down here?" he teased.

"Nah, girls are freakish things that're nearly demons.   Good for fun but not for more than that."

"I was thinking about marrying Anya but she didn't want to be a stepmommy."

"That's her lack of brains, boy.   With the way you spoil those two little demons of John's, you'd have spoiled her to death."

"She demanded I spoil her.   She was formerly demonic and getting used to being human again.   She learned from Cosmo and Buffy."

Kyle gave him an odd look.   "Huh?"

"She used to be Anyanka, over women scorned."

Kyle stared at the boy.   "Hit on Dean, boy.   It'll be better for you and he's just as dangerous as a demon."   Xander broke out cackling.   "Seriously, before one guts you some night during a date."

"Actually, she's the first one that didn't try to kill me.   Sunnydale was like that."

"I remember that show.   Buffy die with Glory?"

"They took artillery to Glory.   Buffy was vamped when the cult to Izzy took over the town.  It let the mayor drop her into a nest while unconscious and tied up.   She's souled now."

"Interesting."    He shook his head quickly.   "At least the First can't get out?"

"No, she can't.   Though Sunnydale is looking like it'll close in favor of Cleveland."

"Stay here.   It's safer, boy."   He patted him on the head.   "Caleb didn't give you my map?"

"He said he had one somewhere but he had to find it.   Then I haven't heard from him in months."

Kyle's eyes drifted off into the distance.   "That's because he got overrun.   Crap."   He faded out and came back a few minutes later.   "Buck, one of your folk is nudging Caleb's old stuff."

"Crap," he said, going to find out who and call them.   "Hey, Danet.   It's Buck.   You know the strange stuff?    Yeah, I'm up here with Harris actually.   Snowed in but one of the other hunters just died and he was the weapons connection."   John gave him a hurt look.   "Kyle said one of us is nosing around his stuff."   John nodded.   "He got overrun, John."

"Hell."

"You done with Rosenburg?"

"Chris is making her sorry."   Buck smiled.   "Where are they?"

"Bunker."   He pointed.   John went to look, groaning when he got down there.   Buck smiled at that sound.   "Caleb, yeah.   He was the connection for a lot of hunters.   Can you get hold of that agent and clue him in or assign it to our team once we get back?   We've got a good three feet of snow and a mile driveway to clear plus waiting on the town to plow up to us, Danet.   His daughter's got Ez wrapped around her fingers to make him read to her."

"It's not a chore and I do not have the skills necessary to help anywhere but in the kitchen otherwise," Ezra pointed out.

"You can run a snow blower, Ez.   It's like mowing only on snow."   He listened to her laugh.   "Who has it?"   He smirked.   "Tell the little bitch I said hi and let her know please.   Yeah, she's got a good clue.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "Withic has his case."   Ezra snickered at that.   She knew a lot about the strange stuff.   She was the daughter of a hunter.   The cellphones rang.   Buck grabbed his.   "We're still snowed in."   He smiled.   "Three feet.   We found snow blowers so we're working on it, boss.   Chris, it's Travis.   Let the witch be for a few so you can go back to beating her."

Chris came out to get his phone.   John took his place with Sam for a bit.   "Yes, AD Travis?   We'll be lucky to get out tomorrow.   They can't plow out here until the day after.   We're still digging out the vehicles.   JD right now.   Buck's been helping since the roof sprung a leak during the storm.   Where is Xander?   I don't hear him up there."

"Kyle's ghost is showing him some of the hidden areas."

Chris covered the mouthpiece.   "Any more weapons and they can go with us too," he yelled.   He went back to it.   "Sorry.   Yeah, the guy with the landmines, sir.   His ghost.   I don't know.   I let Buck handle it and tell me later on.   Or beat him if he's banged up."   He smiled.   "Ezra is reading to the guy's daughter.   No, not the ghost's, the new owner's.   Yes, Izzy.   She got him up at eight and made him read to her."   Their boss cackled so loud Ezra could probably hear it halfway across the room.   "She's adorable and giving him looks like he's God for reading to her actually.   He can go do the snow in a few hours, when she goes down."

"Mine," she said, scowling at him.

Buck flopped down giggling.   "She's nearly as fierce as you, Chris."

Xander came up the stairs to look at her.   "You're only borrowing him.   Like you borrowed the toys at daycare that day I had to put you there so I could bug spray."   Izzy pouted, patting his chest.   "You can borrow him for now.   You have to give him back to Chris and Buck later."   She scowled.   "Tough.   Need your morning nap already?"   She sniffled.

"She'll be fine," Ezra told him.

"She'll wail when you guys finally get to leave," Xander corrected.   "And pout me to death."   He looked at Chris.   "What other weapons?"   He grinned and walked off.

"I can ask Tara to unhide them, Xander.   She doesn't like weapons."

"Tara knows not to touch mine.   They were my babies and pets before I had Izzy."

"Someday you'll have to clean out her stash," Dean quipped.

Chris groaned. "Don't joke about it, Dean."   He listened to the boss.   "If we're lucky?   Three days.   If the witch that created the snow storm does it again?   Could be March, sir."   He listened then laughed.   "We're staying sane.   Thank you, Orin."   He hung up.   "He'll tell Nathan he has to keep mucking stalls."   He went back to help the Winchesters talk to Willow.   Dean could have her last.   He deserved the death blow since she had broken his leg.   He let Dean hop in behind him and shut the door again.

Xander looked up a minute later at the wailing going on.   "Banshee?"

"Dean laid into her for his broken leg and poor car," Kyle told him.

"Ah."   He nodded, looking over the map again.   "No hope of a second plow blade?"

"Nope.   Sorry, Xander.   Didn't think I'd need one."   Xander grinned at him.   "Insulation we do have a bit more of.   You can use some of the stuff down here to repack that area up there."   Xander beamed at that idea.   "Though, I'd take the documents and stuff out of the crevices.   Things like the deed."   Xander whimpered.   "Don't worry, it'll be fine, boy."   Xander went up to check on those, coming down to get a paper bag for them.   Then he went back up.   He came down to strip some of the insulation from the basement area and put it upstairs. Buck came to help with that.   It'd be warmer that afternoon to work on the roof again.

***

Xander walked into the Sheriff's office behind the team.   "Problems, Sheriff?"

"Checking to make sure you didn't eat anyone yet, Xander."

"Nope.   We even managed to dig out the Impala and fix that belt so Sam could go hunt with Dean and John could go too.   They're going tomorrow."   He grinned insanely.   "Dish is down though."

"I'll let Craig know.   His phone's down thanks to the storm.   What happened?"

"Willow."

"She alive?"

"Barely," Chris admitted.   The Sheriff groaned.   "We let Dean have her last since she was responsible for his broken leg."

"That's probably mean but good of you."   He looked at them.   "How much more stuff are you taking from the boy's house?"

Chris snorted.   "Don't ask, Sheriff.   Kyle's ghost showed up to show him all the paranoid nooks and crannies he put in."   The Sheriff whimpered.   "So it's good.   Did Kyle buy it?"

"Got it left to him by the former owner for saving him from the thing that came out of the river.   They found the old deed?"

"In the attic," Xander agreed. "Property taxes are due when?"

"Last month but we know you've had some problems.   The mayor thinks she's adorable too."

"I'll go do that today then.   And then get soda, milk, and bread."   Ezra laughed.   "How did you make her not wail?"

"I charmed her into a nap and left during it."

"She'll pout at us later then."   He looked at the Sheriff.   "Any other bad guys come in that I should know about since you called about a new jail resident?"   He pointed.   Xander went to look then came out to get stuff from his truck and went back there to fix Spike.   He came out with him.   "He's harmless but annoying."

"So I heard.   Tara's in town and she wanted him.   I meant the deputy."   Xander went to do an exorcism, making him yelp but climb out of the poor deputy after a few rounds of Latin.   "Do others get this insanity?" he asked Chris.

Buck nodded.   "Yup."

"Wonderful."

"Don't worry about his stash unless he has to use something publically," Chris offered.   "It's all hidden under some 'don't see me' thing and some look like books."   The Sheriff laughed.   "Kyle's very happy watching the baby now and then.   The roof's problem area was fixed.   They'll be fine."

"Good to know."   Xander came out.   "You still sane?"

"Mostly.   Though they can't unprime the spell to make me have another one."   The Sheriff gave him a dirty look.   "Willow again.   That's what started her thing.   She wanted me to give Dean a son."

"I see," he said, then shook his head quickly.   "A bit too redneck for the area, boy."

"That's what I said."   He grinned.   "Don't worry about my shotguns, Sheriff.   I'm a good boy most of the time.   Unless my date of the moment is evilly teasing me or something."

"Find him someone only slightly evil to date?" Buck suggested.   "He hasn't had any since he played with a succuba in his second trimester.   His last one used to nearly be one so that's part of it."

"I'm handling it part of the time," Xander complained.

"Not too many girls like that around here.   We mostly have good girls."   He gave Xander an odd look.   "Though, your friends coming again?"

"Probably not.   Cordy's too sick to road trip right now.   We'll be going to see her for the parole hearings for some of the cult members though."

"Anything bigger than that one case and we get a call or Epps gets it," Chris ordered.

"Yes, Chris.   Not like I don't know how to use them for parts."

"Tough."

"Fine.   Spoil my babies."

"I think Ez did that," Vin said dryly.   Ezra swatted him on the arm.   "You did spoil her rotten."

Xander nodded.   "Yeah but she's too cute to say no to."   He looked at the Sheriff.   "I'll be out of town next week."

"Sure.   Have a good trip home."   Xander grinned and went to get the stuff he needed then head home.   "You sure he's fully sane?"

"As sane as he was while pregnant," Buck offered.   That just got a nod.   "He did celebrate the snow blower finding brown areas."

"With the winter we've had, I'm not surprised."   That got a few smiles.   "Have a good ride back to Denver, boys.   I'll call if he gets into too much trouble."   They shook his hand and left.   The Sheriff looked at Spike.   "Go away."

"Too bright and you've got my car locked up."

"Fine.   Rich?   You sane again?"

"Yeah, Sheriff.   Just fine now."   He came out to look at him.   "Want me to get his car?"

"Please."   He went to do that, pulling it around to a shady spot in the back.   "Leave my town, Spike.   I don't care if you are nicer than the average sort.   Shoo.   Now."

"Fine.   Only came to see the little nip."

"I don't care."   Spike strolled off.   The sheriff shook his head.   "At the least Harris will get rid of him in a few days.   Annoying ass British folk."

***

Xander walked into the Hyperion, finding Cordelia leaning her head on the desk.   He put something down beside her and got to work on her neck and shoulders.

She moaned.   "I see you didn't lose any of those muscles," she said quietly.

"Nope.   Shoveling snow helps keep them there.   So does chopping wood."   She smiled back at him.   "Try that.   Bobby knows a seer who uses that to cure her headaches."   She opened the package and nibbled on the laced chocolate.   She even let out a tiny moan. "He said it'll take about a half-hour to work.   Though, he did suggest being changed slightly could help.   You could turn into a succubus and find all the pretty men to drain dry and their energy too."   She swatted back at him.   "Just a suggestion," he said with a grin.

"Asshole," she muttered.   "Where is Isabelle?"

"Joyce.   She demanded."

"Ah."   She looked back at him.   "Thank you."

"Not an issue.   I'd have been here last week but Willow's mystical snow storm hooking up system gave us five feet of snow when she got pissed at them punishing her."

"I heard.   She still can't sit."

"We're damn lucky I had enough food stored," he told her.   "Or else I'd have killed her ass."   She nodded at that.   "Anyway.   How're things otherwise?"

"Bad.   Moving toward the thing this spring."

Xander grinned.   "I can exercise my fabulous nest raiding skills if it'll help."

"Wolfram and Hart."

Xander smirked evilly, holding something up.   "Found that in my attic ceiling."   She took it to look at and moaned.   "Yeah.   So they owe me money.   It was with the estate of the guy that they drove off.   He left it to Kyle and Kyle gave it to me."

"Ooooh.   Angel!" she shouted.

"New vision?" he called as he came jogging down the stairs.

"They don't own the land.   It was in Xander's attic.   It used to belong to the original owner of his paranoid compound."

"You're feeling better?"

"Bobby knew of a painkiller that helps another seer.   It's herbal and it's slightly addictive but it's handy," he said.

"I'll be a junkie, it works," she told him.   She put the rest into her drawer in an envelope marked 'seer's drugs in chocolate'.   Then closed and locked it from Fred.   "Can we use that?"

He read over the deed.   "Yeah, we can."   He smiled.   "Let me call someone.   Thanks, Harris."

"Give me a list of nests too.   I need to get out and do something beyond shovel snow and work on my house's roof."

"I can do that too.   Bring gear?"

"Of course.   Before you ask, Joyce has Izzy."

"I can get you a list right now," he offered, going to get it for him.   Xander took it off to light up their lives.   Literally in the case of the vampires' nests.   Angel's helpful contact Lindsey came in to see what he had found.   That got a good-guy's evil plan going.   That could definitely help them a lot.

***

Xander called the guy he knew locally.   "Megan, why are you answering Don's phone?   No, it's Xander.   I was just raiding a nest and found a huge ass bomb.   Want it?"   He smiled.   "East side.   I have *no* clue but my phone has GPS.   Please.   Underground by the way but the opening's about a foot behind me and I left it open.   Thanks."   He put it down and went back to looking at the pretty toys.   He had made sure that the magical stuff had went to Gunn already.   And the handguns in case any of them were special.   He had even picked out a few guns to give the Winchesters a new one for the holidays if they weren't stolen.   Don would know how to make sure of it.   He heard running feet.   "I'm down here," he called.   Colby slid down the ladder.   "Nice style."   He pointed.   "That thing?"

"That's a huge bomb," he agreed.   "Disarmed?"

"Not on when I got here."

"Even better.   Don, it's bigger than the hole," he called.

"There's another entry somewhere but I'm not sure where and neither was Gunn or Angel," Xander called up.   "Or how to take it apart."   He looked at the demon coming their way.    "How are you today?" he asked in the demon tongue he could speak.

"You defile their holdings."

"Yay."   He snapped another light stick.    "They won't need it."

"Knight," he groaned.   "Are you back?"

"Not yet.   I may switch to Cleveland, not sure.   I'm here to kill some time before the cult's parole hearings and to give me more things I can teach my brilliant daughter."

The demon bowed to him.   "As is reasonable.   We had heard she was mundane."

"So am I really."   That got a nod.   "If you hear of more nests that need my special touch, I'm in town for a few days."

"You took out many of them but I shall ask around.   I do know of one that would make others pleased."   Xander gave him a pen from his pocket and some paper from Colby's.    He wrote down the address for them.   "They are annoying, sing off-key too loudly, and their neighbors are bored by them."

"Thank you.   Let me look at them later tonight."   That got another bow and the demon left.   Xander looked at Colby.   "Some of them like me more than Willow does.   Do youknow how hard it is to dig out from five feet of snow?"

"She did?"

"Yeah.   To try to get me to hook up with Dean.  There was a second, smaller storm later that first night that nearly got her killed."   Colby whimpered.   "Exactly.   And she primed the stupid spell," he said quietly.   "She wanted a nephew and decided there had to be one to carry on the Winchester family name."

"She alive?"

"Barely.   Still can't sit and it's been a week."

"I'd have killed her after the first time.   I couldn't even imagine myself going through a pregnancy."   He shook his head and shuddered.   "I want shot if I end up that way."

Don came down with one of their ATF contacts.   "You get knocked up by some witch and we'll do that, buddy."   They looked at the bomb and other stuff.   "This the only heavy stuff, Xander?"

"No, but I thought I should get you guys to get this and then come get the rest from Gunn's hiding spot.   He's watching it for me."

"That's fine.   I trust Gunn."   The ATF agent gave him an odd look.   "They're the ones stopping Wolfram and Hart from destroying the city."

"Oh, *that* group."

Xander grinned.   "I'm from Sunnydale's group."   The guy stiffened and looked at him.   "Now I'm in Montana and I've got an ATF team who came to remove my new house's mines that the old owner put in the lawn."

"Which one?"

"Team Seven out of Denver."

The guy whimpered.   "I'm so sorry you had to deal with Larabee."

"Nah, he's nice.   My daughter cooed and played with his hair the night before we got them unsnowed in at my place.   She managed to keep Ezra fully occupied reading to her the whole week."

"Snowed in with Team Seven for a week?" he demanded.   "How are you sane?"

"They keep wondering that about me," he said dryly.   The ATF agent cracked a smile at that.   "Then again, their people wondered if I drove them insane.   No cable either.   The dish needed fixed."

"Damn," Colby said.   "I saw the pictures of your compound."

"Most of the mines are gone."

"Good!"   He shook his head.   "How are we getting this out of here?"

"I can take it apart but it'll take a few hours."   Xander handed over his tools.   "Do you know bombs?"

"Smaller and construction worthy ones.   Not like that.   I would've called sooner if that had been running.   Or we can crack the ground and lift it."

"That'll take hours," Don complained.

Xander looked behind them, saying something back that way.   A large, sightless demon lumbered their way.   "Little forward, into the sun?   It's got a ladder."   The demon nodded, finding the hole by humming then reached up to dig the hole bigger.   It came down around them.   "Thank you for your help."   He patted it and hummed.   It hummed back and nuzzled him then left them alone.   "Earth digging demons are generally peaceful and very nice beings unless you try their nests."

"Most people are until you threaten their families," Colby agreed.   He looked up.   "Ropes."   The waiting agents got them some.   They hoisted the bomb up and the other stuff that had been gathered for them.   "Let's hit Gunn's storage area, Xander.   Don?"

"Coming."   He got into their SUV to follow Xander's truck.   It wasn't that far away.   Gunn met them at the door.   "Xander's looted stuff?"

"Back corner, under the tarps.   The rest is my people's stuff and not weapons unless it's stake throwers and things."

"That's fine.   We trust you to not go thug on the populace," Colby assured him.   That got a smile and a nod.   Now he knew why David had said he wouldn't come.   He and Gunn didn't get along.   David didn't usually get along with guys who ran in gangs, even helpful ones like Gunn's.   Colby moved the tarp and whimpered.   "Oh, damn."

Don looked.   "That's bad."

Xander looked.   "Where's the rest?"   Gunn pointed when the agents gaped.   Xander went to remove the rest of the tarps.   "Can we take a picture for Chris?   He kept nagging me to  turn it in."

"Sure," Gunn agreed, letting him get in position os they could take a picture for his buddies.   Those ATF agents sounded like hardasses who were going to keep Xander sane and on the straight and narrow since a few of their team had went to the wrong side.   Even if Buffy had a soul, she was still a bit too wild as a vampire for his tastes.

Don looked at the pile.   "We can't fit all this in the SUV and his truck."

"We can lend you ours, but I don't want agents in here," Gunn said.   "Too many of the guys could get hurt.   They see black men massing and thing we're all thugs."

"I know you're not, Gunn," Don assured him. "If we could borrow it, I'll have it given back later?"

"Sure."   He went to get the truck and bring it in there so they could load it.   Xander looked then up, then muttered and floated things in there.   Gunn gave him an odd look.   "When did you start doing that?"

"When I sprained my back two weeks after the birth and Izzy needed a bottle.   That's all I can do though."

"Good!   Because I heard how magic goes wrong around you."

"Thank Willow that I have this much skill.  It came out during the pregnancy."

"Another good reason to beat her."

"No, that's her primping the pump so she can have a nephew.   She decided Dean needed a kid."

Gunn shuddered.   "No.   We saw way too much of your pregnant ass last time, Xander.   You were freaky then.   Please don't."

"It's not connected to anything but that is why she broke his leg and snowed us in.   So he'd have the time to hit on me."

Gunn patted him on the shoulder.   "Remember, you're still sane.   No matter what she does to you."

"The dish is down."

"It can be fixed.   Then you'll have entertainment beyond the cute one again."   Xander nodded, looking at the other stuff.   "That's ours, kid."

"Fine."   He pointed at something.   "That wasn't."

"Nope."   It got put into the truck too.   Gunn closed the door then drove it outside again.   He ran into a few demons carrying things.   "Are we handing them to the FBI too?"

"The Knight isn't keeping them?"

Xander grinned.   "I've got my stash hidden from the ATF guys who like my daughter."   They smiled and let Xander sort them.   He got to go home with two new toys but Don got the rest since they didn't look like they'd work.   And he told the demons that before sending them over.

"How did you get those?" Don asked.

"Hobla."

"Hobla?" Colby asked.

"The orange and puce weapons guy?" Xander asked.   They nodded.   "He's selling junk again.   You guys should get your goods back and bring Don or Gunn here to his stash."   They beamed and went to be an angry mob on the weapons dealer.   Don patted him on the back.   "Welcome."

"Know any human ones?"

"Two or three," Xander and Gunn said together.   Xander looked at him.   "Eric and Paul and who?"

"Paul, David, and Morris.   Sorry, he does our stakes and specialty bullets."

"Any who're going to sell to the wrong side?" Don asked patiently.

"Craig," they said together.

"He has a rep for selling crappy stuff," Gunn said.   "That's why he's a method of emergency."

"Paul's little brother was into drugs the last I heard," Xander told Gunn.

"I heard he's in rehab."   They considered it.   "Who did you get the RPG from?"

"Nest then I modified it."

"Oh.   Pity."

"Now, up north, there's Corboran.   There's Toddy.   There's Milt but he's moved to Frisco recently.   And there's Chuck.   He's an ass."   That got a nod.   "Any of them, please have.   Just don't say you got 'em from me."

"We can do that," Colby said.   He let Xander write down their names and areas/addresses for them.   "Thanks, Xander."   Gunn added his list.   "Thanks, Gunn."

"Welcome but the same rules apply.   It's bad for us when we have to get something.   Drives the price up."

Xander looked at him.   "I told Chuck if he ever sold me something unworking again I was going to turn him in after I rammed it up his ass to try to fire it.   Maybe the lube would help it."   Gunn laughed.   "I don't mind gay men but I'll be damned."

"That's fine," Don agreed.   "Those sort become victims of whoever buys from them when they get mad about the junk.   Or they get fixed by someone who can."   They got into the truck, Colby driving their SUV.   "I'll bring it back soon, guys."   They headed back to the Federal building to turn them in for destruction.   The ATF agent from earlier was waiting on them.   "Hey."

"What's all this?"

"The stuff he found from some nests and some of the demons handed over stuff that didn't work that a dealer had them buy."

"Interesting.   Can we deal with them?"

"Harris told them to go be an angry mob," Colby said as he got out.   "Wish I had that floating stuff right about now."

"That's what rookies and interns are for, guys.   If you didn't scare them off, you'd know that."   He called upstairs.   "Sir, we have a handover of a lot of artillery cases that needs unloaded.   Yes, sir.   Garage.   Epps and Granger, sir."   He hung up.

Don got out to open the back of the truck.   "Supervisor."

"Epps, where did you get this?"

"One of the Sunnydale team went raiding some of their kind's storage areas.    We were also given the names of some who have a rep for selling junky stuff," Colby said.   That got a grin from the ATF supervisor.

"Harris went raiding, sir," the ATF agent said.

"Why is he in town?   I heard Team Seven out of Denver had him in Montana."

"Parole hearings for some of the members of the cult to his daughter," Epps said.   "Visiting friends."

"Well I guess it's useful.   At least the military has that town shut down."

"It'll be going down soon," Don said quietly, getting an odd look.   "They said the problem up there is going to close soon and move to Cleveland by the energy studies they've been doing.   They have plans to make the area safe and start over."

"Aw, shit, that'll cause hell and publicity."

"Yup," Colby said.   "But it'll mean LA will be a bit safer."

"My son's in the Cincinnati office," the supervisor told him.   "I'm having him move to Colorado.   He's polite enough to not get in Team Seven's way."

"Xander spent over a week snowed in with most of them," Don offered.   "Said his daughter got Standish to read to her the whole time."

"And Larabee didn't eat him?"

"No, apparently not."

"That girl might just be a saint then."   He shook his head before calling for the rookies to come unload the truck.   "Whose truck?"

"LA's team," Epps told him.   "That's who he's visiting.   He used to date Chase."

"That poor man.   She's a bit loud."

Anya appeared, looking at them.   "Leave my former pookie alone.   Even if he is a mother now, it's not right to pick on Xander.   The girls did it too often and look at him now."

"Are your kind making sure that no one else can turn into Xander?"

She snorted. "Hell yes.   D'Hoffryn said if another Xander is ever created, he's going to take the baby away from the bad parents and have him raised by demons.   It'd be nicer to our side.   Though we don't think there'll ever be another Willow/Buffy combination to warp him as well as the bad family.   It's sad but motherhood straightened him out a lot."   She floated the rest of them out.   "We do know that the Wolfram and Hart vault is bigger and badder?"

"We can't get in there without a warrant.   Unless they find some way to be exposed?" Colby offered.   "Like maybe someone made a wish?"

"No, but I think Xander was going to go raid their vault later on.   If you catch him in the act...."   She disappeared.   That had been a good plan of Xander's.

"Harris is a planner," Colby said dryly.   "Let me get the truck back to Gunn."   He got in and drove off smiling and happy.   The whole Federal complex hated Wolfram and Hart now that they knew they were behind the bad takeover attempts of LA.   They only needed an excuse.   And even if they used the flimsy excuse they wouldn't be giving the weapons back, even if the arrests didn't stand up in court.

***

to part 5

Xander yawned as he walked in, finding Bobby making cocoa.   "Bad day?"

"Fairly.   You're out of coffee."

"Got some in the truck."   He put Izzy down.   "Stay."   She shook her head and pointed at Bobby.   "Ask him, not me."   He went to get the coffee and soda from the truck, coming back in and shutting the door.   "John and the boys?"

"Fine.   What were you doing in LA?   We heard about it and most of us laughed."

"Wolfram and Hart are behind all the stress on Angel's crew.   They're literally the lawyers for hell."   Bobby nearly dropped his mug.   "Break it and you replace it."

He put the mug down.   "They're...."

Xander nodded.   "Yeah, takeover bids and all.   They had plans to open a portal in LA so a mass invasion would happen.   Another one to bring eternal night."   Bobby shuddered.   "So, yeah, I snuck in there with some help from Gunn.   I taped what I saw and had him send the feed to Epps, who decided to use chasing my breaking and entering as an excuse to follow me in.   It's flimsy but the judge agreed that stuff found while chasing a criminal is allowed in court and that freeing me because I had done this to get the attention on them was fine with her.   She said next time to leave an anonymous tip."

Bobby groaned, shaking his head.   "You're insane, kid."

"Cable's off again."

"It's fixed now."

Xander beamed.   "Thank you."

"Welcome, goofy.   What's wrong with her?"

"I didn't let her listen to the station she wanted.   She's getting spoiled.   I'm not allowing it."

"She's not too bad."

"Yes she is.   She tried to beat someone who wasn't paying attention to her when Dawn had her at the mall."   Bobby laughed.   "She's spoiled.   I am not going to have that sort of a princessly daughter."

"Sure, I get that.   How much stuff did Buck get writer's cramp from?"

"None.   It was in LA so I told Epps.   He was most happy to help get that stuff gone.   Including the huge bomb we found under East LA.   The artillery.   The dealer selling junky artillery was taken down by his customers.   A few others who sell crappy things got given over too.   That way I don't have to play 'I want one that works, that thing is going to kill us all if we don't blow it up' again."

"I can see that."   He patted the boy on the shoulder.   "Put her down for a nap."

"She just got up and she can nap on the couch."   He got her the bear from her bag, making her happier.   "Cordy got her her first tiara."

"She's not that sort of princess."

"No but she wanted it bad enough to nearly shoplift the sparklies."   Bobby laughed harder at that.   "She did!   Helped Cordy pick out a pair of shoes.   Helped Dawn pick out a bathing suit."   He shook his head.   "They were trying to warp her into a girly little girl."

"She'll be the sort of girl she wants to be.   Even if she does have spoiled moments."   She was trying to get into her bag.   "Trying to get her tiara?"

"Or the stuff I found in a nest but I think I gave Chris that stuff so he could check it for me in case it was stolen.   He even let me keep the guns I found for Christmas presents after checking them for being stolen."

"That's nice of him.   How did the parole hearings go?"

"Bad.   They're mostly out but warned to stay away from us or else they can go back in. It's part of their probation instructions.   Or parole ones, whatever they are.   They're not to leave the state and if we're back there, there's a restraining order.   I stopped to give the Sheriff the name list and Don's sending him an ID file since they're still insistent that she's a saint."

"She's adorable but not that way."   He got the tiara out for her, letting her put it on with a grin. "You're cute."   She beamed happier and gave him a hug.   "Why don't you nap?"   She pointed at the tv.   He turned it on PBS for her and she laid down in her tiara, cuddling her bear to nap to Sesame Street.   "She's going to be a nerve-wracking hellion soon."

"Too late," Xander snorted.   "She learned how to walk while we were there.   She followed Angel around the whole time.   Whenever he was up she was his shadow, toddling behind him with her bear.   She'd babble something to her bear and look up at him.   It was like she was reporting on him to some hidden microphone."   Bobby snickered, leaning on the nearest chair.   "Exactly."   He flopped down.   "Cordy said thank you.   It's helping a lot and she's looking into being tainted into a half-demon to cure the headaches."

"If it helps."

"I suggested a succuba so she could play with the pretty boys but she didn't like that idea."

"You need to date, Xander."

"There's no evil women around here."

Bobby looked at him.   "Try a good girl for once."

"I did.   She turned evil."

"Not Faith."

"I'm talking about Cordelia."

Bobby snorted, shaking his head.   "No, a real good girl."

"I'd hit on Megan but it'd take away her geek snuggly."

"That's not good for him.   They deserve it with what they do."   He looked at her then got the boy some cocoa.   "How were things otherwise?"

"Joyce is okay.   She demanded the first visit when I called to tell her I was nearly in town.   She babysat while I went to raid nests.   I came back that night and she said I had been gone way too long but Gunn told her why when he came in.   That's how I found out Dawn and Cordy took her to the mall."   Bobby grinned.   "So she let me off the spanking hook for that bit of babysitting.   Spike finally go?"

"Few days ago.   Kyle drove him off even if you did like him."

"He was my roomie for a while and I understand him.   I'm not scared but I'm respectful of him.   Though he won't be getting back in.   I'll do an uninvite later."   That got a smirk.   "We all know how to do that thanks to Angelus.   He did threaten to slip his soul and nibble on her once.   Said she was the sort that Dru would've picked.   He got smacked upside the head for it by Cordelia.   She was mean too, she used Wes's cricket bat.   He said she's still too adorable for words and he said he's telling his father that she's his only heir since he believes he'll have a demon spawn if he has one of his own.   Fred made cookies and tacos with her, making her happy but fart and belch for the next two days.   Including during the hearings."

That got a nod and a smile.   "But they all agreed it was a good visit and they got driven nuts by my little girl.   They all said it's good I'm still a bit sane.   Hopefully.   Though Cordy did say she'd send someone out here soon so I'd have a girl to drool on beyond my daughter when she climbs in with me at night."   The phone rang so he reached back to grab it.   "Yeah, it's me."   He listened.   "That's what I expected, Chris.   Well, not many of them can *buy* the stuff.   Sure, whatever's left please.   Thank you.   Tell them I found it or whatever."   He hung up.   "Some of the stuff I found was stolen.   It's being returned."

"Will that get you in trouble?"

"Nope."

"Good."   He looked out there then at him.   "I came looking for research books and found weapons."

"That's the illusion I have for most of them.   I need to take down Chris's camera before I expose them all.   He knows I have some, but not what exactly."

"That's fine.   Can we?"   Xander nodded, going to do that.   The camera got put into an envelope when Xander went out to get the other cases from the truck.   Bobby moaned.   Xander grinned and put them under the illusion too.   "Any others real books?"

"Back room."   He led him to it.   They had filled in the bookcases with the real books while snowed in.   "How's that?"

"Bigger than my collection."

"Wes said if he dies, I'm getting his."   He grinned.   "All sorts of watchery stuff."

"That'd be nice.   You'll share?"

"Of course.   Cordy says I share way too much."   Bobby bopped him on the arm but let it go.   He found what he wanted to look through.   "What're we looking for?"

"A certain higher demon."   He pulled out the description.

"That's D'Hoffryn.   Over vengeance demons.   Why?"

"He was seen in a town."

"Hey, Anya?" Xander called, looking up.   She appeared, handing him something.   "From?"

"That nice ATF agent who got annoyed when I shared what you're usually like."

"I'll call him later to tell him thanks.   He thinks D'Hoffryn was cutting up in a town down here?"

"He was drunk and maudlin so he went to find someone who needed him."   She looked over Bobby's shoulder, finding what he wanted.   "There you go.   I'll talk to him, Bobby."   She pinched his cheek.   "Maybe you should have Xander.   It's been a while for both of you so he must be desperate and you do have a hunter's stamina."

"I'm a widow, Anya.   Thank you for the help."

"Welcome."   Xander held up the envelope.   "Sure, I can do that.   The young one wanted to hear more."   She beamed and disappeared.

Xander put the package down, looking at him.   "It's not mean," he said at the odd look he was getting.

"I'm sure they might see it differently."

"Maybe but it'll do JD good to hear more about what she does.   Especially since one of them tried to get her to curse him for not going for her."

"Poor Buck and Chris."

"Poor Vin.   She likes him to replace me."   Bobby went to call him.   "By the way, I found the fax machine," he called after him.

"Thanks, Xander."   He dialed Buck's number.   "You might wanna warn Vin that Anyanka likes him to replace Xander in her bed," he said quietly.   "And she brought back Chris's cameras so she could talk to JD.   Said he wanted to hear more about what she used to do.   Xander said it wasn't mean to send her back to talk to him, just educational."   He hung up on the swearing his old friend was doing.   "Anything else on his class of demons, Xander?"

"Two or three."   He came out with them.   "Research away, Bobby.   I've got to put our stuff up."   He took the package into the back bedroom to hide then came out to grab the clothes to be put up.   He had hit a laundromat in Denver before hitting the road.

"What was in the package?"

"The princess's crown jewels."

Bobby looked up.   "What?"

"Common currency underground."

"Never mind.   I don't need to know."   He went back to researching, making notes when Xander handed him a few pens and a notebook.   "Thanks, kid."

"I like being a library," he quipped.   He checked on his daughter then went to start dinner.   He was tired of potatoes so he decided on some steaks and corn instead.   Maybe some tomatoes too.   That'd work.   Though he did give Bobby more cocoa since he was busy reading and hadn't realized he was out yet.   He got a grin for it and then went back to puttering.

***

John woke up a few weeks later when he heard a car engine, getting up to see his son driving off into the early dawn light.   "It's too early for him," he muttered, going to check their room.   Sam was still there.   "Sammy?"   He shook him to wake up faster.   "Sammy!"

Sam sat up rubbing his eyes.   "What?"

"Why did Dean leave?"

"Probably for coffee."   He looked around the room, noticing some things.   "Never mind.   He's going to visit his niece."

John looked around then at him.   "How can you tell?"

"His bag's gone.   Those are my weapons there."   He pointed at the small pile.   He looked up.   "Should we call?"

"Give him a few days and then call.   You can travel with me, son."   He patted him on the head.   "I know he didn't mean to really dump you."

Sam nodded.   "I think the 'you should have stuck with him' lectures you tried to give me after we were sure she was mine stuck in him better, Dad."

"Dean does feel very strongly about his family," he agreed.   He mentally sighed.   "I'll call him later on."

"Give him a few days, Dad.   He'll need it to figure out if this is what he really wants."

"I guess.   Did he leave notes on the ghost?"   Sam got up to look, waving them.   John took them back to his room.   "Since we're up, breakfast?"

"If you're buying.   I'm broke."

"Fine.   Get dressed, meet me outside in twenty minutes."   Sam went to shower and dress.   John went to do the same, mentally wondering at his son's sudden itch to have a male wife.   That wasn't what Dean usually wanted.

***

Xander looked up when he heard the car, waving at Dean as he shoveled the newest snow off the front stairs.   "Did I send you guys film of her walking?" he asked when Dean came up the stairs.

"You did.   I thought it was cute she followed Angel around until he growled."   He stared at him.

Xander looked at him.   "No Sam?"

"No, no Sam."

"Well, if you want pity cuddles, she's down for a nap."

"That's fine.   Thanks, Xander."

"You know I'm not going to say anything, Dean.   Sometimes the job gets to you and you need a bit of cooing and petting to make it better."   Dean gave him a weak grin but went in to check on his niece.   Xander frowned at his back.   That hadn't been the normal tired look Dean usually had when he got there.   Huh.   He went back to shoveling.   It'd be spring soon.   He was nearly counting down the days until spring.   White was no longer a color he appreciated all that much.   Even though the locals had said that most winters weren't this bad anymore; he was hoping the next one would be better.   He finally got done and went inside to find Dean rocking her slowly and her napping on his shoulder.   Xander took a picture and went to start on lunch.   He was starved and Dean was a bottomless pit.

Dean stared outside while thinking.   This was seriously not his usual thing but this was his family.   He was not going to let his little princess be raised alone.   Sammy might not be able to handle being a full time father.   Most of the time when they left Sammy talked about her for a day and then trailed off to now and then mentions.   Dean constantly wondered how she was doing.   It was like she was his daughter.   That had gotten him thinking during the broken leg.   She even had the blonde hair still.   Ellen was teasing him about faulty paternity tests again.   She yawned and blinked up at him, smiling and giving him a baby kiss on the chin.   "Hey, Izzy.   How was your nap?"

"No."

"No what?   You did nap.   I saw you," he said with a grin.

"No go."

"Me?   Nah, I'm not going anywhere.   This is my family and that's the man I am.   You're not getting rid of me anytime soon."   He shifted her some then got up to change her diaper, bringing her out to the kitchen.   She let off a wail.   "What?"

"She doesn't like the meat I'm cooking," Xander said, giving his daughter a look.   She pouted.   "It's not for you.   It's for us.   You can have the cheese."   She got put into her high chair with the promised cheese and was happier.   "She's already got teenage food mood swings," he joked.

"Sammy still has those too."   He sat down, watching Xander cook.   Xander gave him an odd look but went back to making them warm sandwiches.   "How's the roof holding up?"

"No more leaks so far.   This spring the rest is going to get replaced.   We're still hearing rumors that Sunnydale's going under this spring's apocalypse.   If so, the run to Cleveland begins."   Dean nodded at that.   "Faith doesn't want me there.   She had better reasons than Buffy did.   She didn't want to make Izzy an orphan."

"I can see that.   You're her only real parent, Xander.   The rest of us are like babysitters she likes a lot," he said at his odd look.

"I guess.   They'll still need the help."

"Not necessarily.   All the hunters are going to converge on Cleveland for the spring thing there."   Xander nodded.   "Faith and the military guys?"

"Sunnydale.   Buffy too but Angel's crew is going to be handling the smaller issues going on in LA."

"Decent.   If we had a safe sitter to put her with, we could go."

Xander looked at him.   "Bobby's going?"

"Bobby and Dad both.   Ellen's been organizing the trip and who gets what part of the city to lounge in for the build-up.   They're getting nearer to the hellmouth.   Sammy and I are backing them up."   Xander nodded.   "Unless you think Angel can handle her and their problem?"

"No.   If Sunnydale sinks, everyone's going to run to LA.   It's got the best hiding areas and the portals to other planes for escape."   That got a nod.   "I know the Devon coven is going to be watching and Willow's going to Cleveland to make sure it doesn't open."

"That's cool.   Are they on the same day?"

"Moon dark and then the night of the full moon," Xander admitted.   "So Faith and them might make it to Cleveland too.   I'll have her call Ellen to go over that plan."

Dean grabbed the phone to do that.   "Ellen, Dean.   There's going to be a gap between Sunnydale's last stand and the one in Cleveland.   About two weeks.   Moon dark is when it falls?"   Xander nodded.   "Then Cleveland goes on the full moon.   Willow's going to be on standby in case it's going to open.   Angel's got a small something going on in LA that his team will handle.   Xander's trying to figure out if he can get there too."   He listened.   "I can understand that.   That may be fine.   Xander, there's a few other hunters with kids who want to go."

"I might be able to babysit but I've never done it before with older kids."

"These kids know hunting so they'll probably pout that they were left out and stuff," he offered.

"Sure.   If they want, I can let them have the huge bunker down there for a long sleepover."

Dean repeated that.   "Yeah, Kyle's ghost showed him where it was. We have no idea what's holding him here."   Xander pointed at the wall.   "Really?"

"He tied his old protections to his blood."

"That makes more sense."   He told her that, getting a 'that sounds like him' back.   "I'm here with Xander.   We need to get in touch with Faith to get her an assignment in case they can run that way.   She's got those military guys too."   He nodded, taking down the information.   "I can do that.   Thanks, Ellen."   He hung up and called Faith's phone.   "Faith, Dean Winchester.   We know there's going to be a gap between Sunnydale going south and Cleveland lighting up?"   He smiled.   "One of ours is planning that.   We're getting a mass of hunters in Cleveland beforehand.   Dad and Bobby too.   Willow's going to be on hand for the opening if it happens.

"That's what we were thinking.   I can do that. Tell the military guys that they'll have an assigned area to cover if they make it there.   If not, you and whoever can.   It'll bridge between Dad's and another hunter's area.   If not, Sammy will cover it.   We're closer to the hellmouth because we've been to Sunnydale."   He nodded, making note of that.   "Ellen is.  At the Roadhouse, yeah."   He smiled.   "That's fine, Faith.   Sure, I can fax the map to Angel for you.   You're going to be there tonight?   Or when?"   He made a note.   "I can do that.   Thanks, Faith.   Good luck.   Xander's agreed to babysit some of the others' kids if they want to go.   Sure, call me and I'll come."   He hung up, looking at him.   "She likes that idea."

"I like that idea."

"The you babysitting idea.   She didn't want Izzy anywhere near the hellmouth until it settled down again."

"That is a consideration and why she needs a stepmom pretty badly."

Dean nodded.   "That's something to think about.   A steady female influence."   Which he wasn't so he wasn't sure Xander would accept him.

"I think I can give the steady female influence with all the ones I was surrounded by," Xander said dryly.   "Just to have another parent there so I could go do what was necessary without dropping her off suddenly on someone."

"That too," Dean agreed.   That was looking better for his plans.   "Is there something around here?"

"A few demons have popped up on their way through.   I took out one the other night.   I'm going tomorrow to take out a nest of vamps that've decided to move in across the county line tomorrow.   She's going to daycare tomorrow actually.   She likes it," he said at Dean's odd look.   "One of the nicer churches has one.   They let her squeal, play, and interact with normal kids."

"Me?" she asked.

"Yes, you.   You get to play at the church tomorrow, Izzy."

Dean smiled.   "She seems to remember it fondly by the evil smirk she has."

"There's a set of twin girls with long blonde hair.   She likes to play with it.   Knots it all to hell too."

"Of course she does."   He patted her on the head, getting a blown kiss.   "Where did you learn that from?"

"Anya was over a few days back and taught her to blow kisses so she could do it at boys when she's older."   They shared a grin.   "I'd let her watch Izzy so I could get there but she said she refuses to babysit.   It might infect her with the desire to have her own."

"She is cool that way.   I know I've had that thought a few times too."   Xander gave him another odd look.   "Someday."

"I guess that's cool but don't tell Willow.   I'm not sure I want to be pregnant again."

Dean laughed.   "I can understand that."   He looked at her.   "Have you said my name yet, princess?"

"Not yet.   I tried.   She can almost get Sammy out.   She called him Summy so far."

Dean grinned.   "There's days I called him submarine when he was younger."   Xander giggled, handing him a plate.   She looked at it then made a pouty face.   "You didn't want this stuff."

"Give her a piece, she'll still not want it," Xander quipped.   He tried but she scowled at him.   She took one from Dean.   "Looks like she's playing favorites today too."   He ate a bite of his pork chop sandwich.   "When should I start to expect the kids?"

"We can get with them later."   Xander nodded before taking another bite.   Dean ate one and hummed.   "Good job."

"Thanks."   He grinned.   "Sodas in the fridge."

Dean got one for each of them since he was closer then sat down to let Izzy steal another bite to gnaw into baby food.   "If you like it, why did you fuss?"

"She's a girl," Xander said dryly.   "What happens when Cleveland's closed again?   She'll need me soon enough."

"We're seeing what's going to happen," Dean admitted.   "Depending on how strong it is.   You should ask Riley what his orders are."

"I did, he's checking.   The Council wants to kill Faith momentarily so they can have a second living slayer too."

"Hmm.   Might be easier but could crap out on them.   Be some psycho."   Xander nodded.  "How does she feel about that?"

"She doesn't like the idea but she doesn't want to do it alone.   Buffy pouted about not being counted as one anymore, but that's just her girl mood showing again."   That got a nod.   "So we'll see."   He called Faith.   "Hey, it's me.   Are you coming here on your way to Cleveland?"   He smiled.   "It'll be late spring by then, Faith.   I won't have the snow.   There will be brown and green instead of white.   Because I need to know what Riley's planning and all that.   Because you might still need me, Faith.   So I'll have to get to Cleveland after the danger's done with."   He nodded.

"I know that, but it took years for Sunnydale to get that bad.   Exactly.   That's what I was thinking.   No, tomorrow I'm taking out a nest because they moved close by.   She'll be in daycare."   He grinned at Dean.   "Feeding her some of his pork chop, which she wailed about earlier.   Yeah, that mood.   We're here and I got the position of safety zone and babysitter.   Thanks, Faith.   Yeah, definitely keep me in the loop."   He took a sip of soda.   "If they're going to go with their plan, come here, Faith.   We'll do it here.   Because I'm the one who got Kendra activated and I'm feeling sentimental?" he suggested.   "I seem to draw the dead," he offered sarcastically, making her laugh.   "Thanks, Faith."   He hung up.   "She'll come here to do that attempt."

"That works for me," Dean agreed.   "You did?"

"Gave Buffy CPR."

"I must've missed that episode of the show."   Xander smirked at him.   "I knew there were two but I must've missed that one.   Will you need help with the nest?"

"Not really.   You can nap tomorrow, Dean.   I know you're tired."

"I can help."

"If I need it, I'll call.   This way you can get a nap without the bedtime snuggly one there."

"You'll call if you need help?"

"Of course."   He grinned.   "That's why I'm going during the day."

"Good idea."   He went back to eating, handing her another divot of meat.   She beamed and nibbled on it.   "She's weird."

"She's young.   She'll grow into her version of strange soon enough."   Dean cackled, nodding.   "We all did.   That's what makes us unique."   He ate another bite, getting a look from his daughter.   "Want some of mine now?"   He held up a bite, letting her take it to taste then eat with a hum of pleasure.   "Thanks, dear."   He finished his lunch but Dean moved to do the dishes.   "I can.   Not like there's so much to do today."

"It's cool.   I can help out."   Xander nodded, taking her out to the living room to read to her.   Dean went back to thinking.   Xander wasn't the sort of person he was usually attracted to.   But he was family.   So was the baby.   She walked in and gave his leg a hug, getting a smile back.   "What's up?   Want to help me do dishes?"

"Bobo?"

"I'll read to you when I'm done here.  Go let Daddy do one?"   She smiled and went back to Daddy's side for her story of the afternoon.   "Too fucking adorable," he muttered, getting back to work on the few dishes.

Xander gave Dean another odd look but went back to reading to her.   He agreed, she was too damn adorable but they'd teach her self defense so all the boys would leave her alone.   Maybe they'd even make her scary so they'd run and hide from her.   That was a plan he could get behind.   "Hey, Dean, when we teach her self defense can we make her scary so the boys run and hide from her?"

Dean gave him an odd look.   "It's that or a chastity belt," he agreed, cracking Xander up.   "I know you don't want to be Grandpa before you're fifty."

"Or later," he agreed with a grin.

"Dad's not looking forward to that state either."   He smiled, getting back to the dishes.   That was a pretty good idea.   "Too bad Sammy won't go for it."

"He will if you mention being a grandfather when she's the same age I was when she was born."

"There is that," he agreed.   "Though Sammy might like that idea.   He's strange that way."

Xander nodded.   "He can be I guess."   He went back to reading because she was poking him on the chest to make him go on.   "Sorry, I was talking to Dean."

"Bobo!"

"Fine."   He went back to reading to her.   "JD got her some books on tape for the holidays.   Including a few Ezra read to her."

"That's cool.   That's a story without a book."   He got done and came out to get the next one.   She gladly wiggled into his lap to let him read to her.   She liked his voice he guessed.It was kinda deep and a bit rough at times.   All the girls liked his voice.   He read her Pooh, because she seemed to like Pooh.   She was even wearing Pooh today.   So that was good for her.

Xander relaxed, letting him do some of the parent stuff for a bit.   It was nice to have help.   His daughter was a demanding little princess some days.

***

Dean waited until he knew Xander was asleep then snuck in there to look down at him.   He stripped down and climbed in next to him.   Xander snuffled then pinned him.   One finger traced things on his stomach, making him wiggle a bit but it wasn't too bad.   He stroked over his hair.

Xander woke up and realized what he was doing, looking up at Dean.   "Did you sneak in for the nightmares?   She does now and then."

"Nah.   Been doing some thinking."

Xander sat up, blinking at him.   "About?"

Dean sighed, sitting up to look at him.   "This is my family, Xander.   I'm not the sort of man who can walk away from my family.   I nearly didn't make it out of Sunnydale that first trip to fight Glory with you guys."   Xander's mouth fell open.   He shrugged a bit.   "To a Winchester, family is everything.   Sammy should have stepped up but...."   He stopped Xander from moving.   "I'm not just doing it because of her.   Because of her I've learned to appreciate you in a lot of ways."   Xander relaxed again.   "It's not just her.   She's a reason but not the whole reason."

"I don't need pity."

"I'm not."   He grinned.   "If you had been a girl, Dad would've had a shotgun but he let Sammy get away with not jumping you.   It feels...wrong to me to not be here for her."

"Then why are you in my bed?"

"Because you come with her and I wouldn't have it any other way?"

Xander blinked a few times.   "That was fairly mushy for you."

"I know, she infected me with the mush she sucks out of others."   Xander snickered.   "Anyway, I, um, wanted to try to be her stepdaddy.   That is if you could handle that?"

Xander shrugged.   "I'm not against the idea of a stepdaddy but I have absolutely no experience in it."   A book thumped onto the bed.   "Gee, thanks, Kyle, but not right now please?"   He looked at the book and held it up, making Dean snicker.   "I think he wants it too."

"Probably.   We're a lot alike, Xander.   We do good together."   Xander nodded.   "I know it's weird and all that, but I made up my mind and if you'll let me I want to try."

Xander considered it.   "Okay but I'm not sure how this is going to happen.   I don't want it to get strange between us if we can't and I don't want you out of her life."

"Of course not.   If it can't go then we'll be buddies."

"What about Sam?"

"Probably moping his butt off in Dad's truck."   He gave him a look.   "I kinda bailed at dawn one morning.   He called to say he understood and it was cool with him.   I saved the voicemail if you want to listen to it."

"No, I'm good with that.   You're not expecting hearts and flowers, right?"

"Hell no.   Shotgun shells now and then but no."

"Those can be nice," he said, laying down.   He yawned.

"Rest, it's late."   Xander nodded, curling up facing the other way.   Dean watched him then hesitantly moved closer.   "Um...   Should I?"

"If you want.   I don't mind."

"What were you drawing on my stomach anyway?"

"I was?" Xander asked, looking back at him.

"Yeah, in your sleep."

"Hmm.   Maybe I am going back to that life when I was on the bride capturing team."   He shrugged.   "If so we'll see."   Dean laughed, swatting him gently.   "No boyfriend abuse, Dean."

"Of course not.   Only playful swats.   If we fight, we can go outside so she doesn't have to hear."

"I like that.   I hated hearing mine fight."

"I can't remember Dad and Mom fighting."   He laid down behind him, facing the other direction.   It was comfortable, they were touching, but he didn't have to do any unmanly cuddling unless Xander got pushy.   "This good?"

"You're really warm."

"You're a bit chilled anyway," Dean said, pulling up another blanket.   Xander snuggled into the warmth and it was good.   He laid there until Xander fell asleep then let himself relax too.   At least Xander hadn't wanted to push for sex tonight.   He knew the guy had to be desperate with only his hand since that succuba.   They could work up to that.   Before he could fully sleep, Xander flipped over and pinned him on his stomach to the bed.   "Xander?" he whispered.   Xander nuzzled his back and purred.   "Sure, the hyena can love on me.   I'm good with furry things loving me as long as they don't bite," he mumbled.   The purring was actually pretty calming and he fell asleep that way.

***

Xander woke up and blinked.   He was nearly on top of Dean.   He flinched back but Dean's arm around his back stopped him.   "Sorry."

"S'okay.   I got purred to sleep.   I got nuzzled a few times, but it's okay."   He grinned.   "Comfy?"

"Surprisingly you are," he joked weakly.

"It's all the muscles."   He let Xander go, watching him nearly flee to the bathroom.   "It's all right, Xander.   I'm cool with it.   I knew you cuddled the first time I slept in the trundle," he called after him.   He got up and went to check on Izzy, who was staring out the window at the snow coming down.   "Did we need to stock anything?   It's nearly white out there."

"I'm starting to hate white."

"I know."   He looked over their daughter's head.   "That's nearly as bad as Willow's snow."

Xander came in and paused when he caught Dean squatting down in his boxers.   He shook himself out of his dirty thought, coming over to check.   "I'm not so sure that's not a Willow storm."

"They were predicting snow," Dean said with a grin.

"Is that why you showed up then?"

"Snowed in does mean we have to talk to each other," Dean admitted, "but no.   The timing was a coincidence."

"Okay."   He looked down at Izzy.   "That looks like it might cancel daycare today."

"It's slowed," Dean offered.   "The truck should be safe enough as long as you're quick."

Xander nodded.   "I can do that.   Can you get her dressed?"   Dean nodded, moving to do that while Xander got himself cleaned up and dressed.   He went to get his gear from the storage area, packing a backpack on the way to the truck.   He came back freezing.   "It's got a wind chill too."

"It'll be fine," Dean promised.   "The radio said it's supposed to stop in a few hours."

Xander smiled.   "That'll be handy.   Maybe I won't have to dig them out."   They ate breakfast and got Izzy ready to go out to daycare.   Dean put on his stuff too.   "I can do it."

"I can watch your back.  It's safer to hunt as a team.   Besides, I've never seen you hunt."

"It's a nest during the daytime.   Not a lot of hunting going on."

"So?"   He shrugged.   They got Izzy into the truck and Xander got him a pack while he strapped her in.   "Thanks."

"Welcome."   He got in to drive, then looked around. "That's going to ice over, isn't it?"

"Yeah."

"Chains then."   He got out to put them on, the engine running so she wouldn't freeze to death.   She was happy bopping to the radio he had left on too.   They finally got in and drove her downtown to the daycare.   Xander walked her and the diaper bag inside, smiling at the nice ladies.   "Doing something for the sheriff today, ladies."   He handed her over.   "One squealy one.   We had breakfast, she's had a bath."

"That's fine, Xander.   Have a good time playing in the snow on orders."   He smiled, going back to the truck.   She stripped Izzy out of her snow suit.   "The twins are in, Isabelle. Would you like to play with them?"   She carried her into that room, letting her down when she wiggled.   They had one girl's dog in so she went to stare at it while they taught her how to pet one.

Xander found the nest and parked, getting out with his pack, Dean following him to the entrance.   They winced at the stink.   "Definitely a nest," he said to himself quietly.   That got a nod.   "Okay, flashlights first.   Stake too."   He pulled them out and moved in carefully.   The flashlight was pointed at the ground for now.   The first vamp that woke up and yelled about him got it in the face, burning him to death.   Then he dove into the fight with the others.   He felt Dean join him and it was...nice to have a hunting partner again.   They fought pretty well together.   He staked and got happy with the vamps.   It had been a while and he was getting out of shape.   He had to go back to practicing.

Dean watched Xander as he staked, nodding at some of his moves.   He was okay.   Clearly out of practice but he could help him with that.   He had seen him in Sunnydale way back when he was early in his pregnancy but he didn't seem to have lost too many of his usual skills or style.   "Duck," he ordered, pulling a gun to shoot at the demon that came lumbering out.   Xander tackled a vamp to get them both down so he could stake him.   That gave Dean the perfect shot so he took it and winged another one coming their way until he could pull out his machete.   Xander finally finished with that vamp and pulled his short sword and attacked it with Dean.   They finished up with that one and looked around to make sure no one was hiding.   "Not too bad," Dean admitted.

"Thanks for the help."

"It's safer."   He grinned.   "We're messy."

Xander looked at himself.   "Yeah, we are.   Fortunately I know how to get goo and ash out of clothes most of the time."   He grinned.   "Joyce taught me."   Dean grinned back.   "Let's clean up, make sure we don't need any groceries, then tell the sheriff before we pick up the princess?"

"Sure."   He followed him back to the truck.   "No looting?"

"The Sheriff is going to send someone to do that."   He smirked.   "He thinks they all have weapons.   I didn't see any so it should be fine.   Just some old clothes."

"Sure."   They drove back to the compound to clean up then checked the cabinets and refrigerator.   Xander made out a short list before grabbing money and heading out.   He dropped Dean off at the office while he went to the store. "Hey," Dean said as he walked in.

"Came back to get snowed in?"

Dean shrugged a bit.   "Needed to talk to Xander."   He glanced at the other guy in there.   "We did what you wanted."

"Thanks, Dean.   Is it horrible?"

"Nah.   A bit messy in places.   The goo should freeze."   That got a shudder.   "Not too many.   Xander said you wanted it first so do you need a map?"

"Nope, I told him where it was."   He took him out to the car once he had his hat.   "Let's go look."

"Sure."   He let the Sheriff drive him that way, showing him how they got in.   He found one scavenger sort of demon in there and shot it.   "Sorry, parts hound."

"They happen I guess."   He looked over the nest, coming up on something that made him wince.   "That's going to cause a problem."

Dean looked at the pretty jewelry box.   "Xander gave Chris the stuff like that he found in LA so it could be checked for being stolen."

"I can check on that," he decided, packing it up and looking at the other stuff.   He found a few things.   "Letters?"

Dean looked.   "That's to a vamp Xander took out in LA from what I heard."   He shrugged and pocketed them.   "Won't hurt to mail."   That got a smirk.   "That way they know they died here."   That got a nod and they kept going.   They found a few more pieces of personal jewelry and called someone to come pick up the clothes so they could be donated along with the camping supplies.   The Sheriff brought Dean back to town, finding Xander waiting on him with Isabelle in the office.   "Hey."

"Hey.   Anything good?"

"Few pieces of jewelry," the Sheriff said, getting a grin back.   "Easy currency from a pawn shop?"

"And some of the higher ones only deal in gems instead of cash," Xander agreed.   That got a nod because it sounded reasonable to him.   "Can you tell him hi, Isabelle?"

"Hi!" she said with a grin and a wave.

"You are so bright," the Sheriff said, giving her a pat on the head.   "Go get snowed in at your place, Harris."

"The guy at the hardware store said to tell you the propane truck is going to be late."

"That's fine.   Needed some?"

"I'm down to half.   I know it's February but I want to be careful to have some left in case of a late snow."

He nodded.   "That makes sense.   This new snow shouldn't be that bad."   He patted the baby on the head again, getting a grin for it.   "You go play with your tiara, princess."

"Don't encourage that," Xander said as he stood up.   "She's already too much of the wrong sort of princess."   The sheriff laughed.   "She tried to bring it with her this morning too."   He walked out with her to more laughs, Dean waving and following him.   "Did I forget anything?"

"Need anything for the brownies?"

"No, we're good on that," he admitted.   He put her into her seat then yawned.

"Let me drive?"

"Sure."   He tossed over the keys and walked around to get in on the passenger's side.   Dean got in to drive and they headed back to the compound with a quick stop to fill up the truck since it was nearly empty.   Dean pulled the truck into the empty storage bay it usually sat in, getting Izzy out first to put her in her room for a few minutes so they could unload stuff.   They carried, finding the house very warm.   Xander turned down the thermostat but that was fine with him.   It was nearly tropical in there at the moment.   They finished up and stripped back down to indoor clothes, going to let the baby out and play with her for a bit.   Dean smiled when the first thing she did was swat her father and pout.   "Not like you could help us unload groceries," Xander told her.

"Mean."

"I am not."   She pointed at her tiara so he handed it over with a sigh, making her happy.   He saw the thermostat being moved.   "Quit that, whichever of you is doing it.   It's too warm and wasting propane."   Kyle appeared and turned it back down so he didn't have to get up.   "Which witch was it?"   Kyle smirked.   "Tara?"   He shook his head.   "Can you go haunt Willow and make her miserable?"   He nodded, going to do that for a while.

"Maybe he'll be able to scare her straight," Dean said, sitting beside Xander on the couch.   "Who gave you that?"

"Cordy and Dawn.   She tried to shoplift it so they bought it for her.   I told them she's not that sort of princess.   They didn't listen."

Dean grinned.   "She's a good princess but we won't let her get too spoiled."   Xander looked at him.   "I won't."

"I know you won't," he agreed quietly.   Dean took a quick kiss then got up to make some coffee.   Xander considered it.   That hadn't been too bad.   His daughter was giggling madly while playing with her bear.   "You're just as strange as I am, only you're cuter."

"She's cute in a different way," Dean called.   Xander blushed, shaking his head.   Dean grinned.   That was a good one.   Xander was cute when he blushed.

Izzy looked up at him.   "Coco?"

"You want to call Aunt Cordy?   We can do that."   He called out there.   "Hey, Wes, my daughter wanted to check in with her semi-goddess of girldom.   No, not Tara."

"T..t..t...t!" she stuttered happily.

He grinned.   "Yes, she did.   Tara does that so she does it to her name.   Like how she smiles and waves whenever she says hi because everyone else does when they say hi."   Wesley laughed at that.   "Want to babble at Uncle Wesley while he gets up Aunt Cordy?"   Wesley said something.   "She okay?"   He nodded, swallowing.   "I knew it was going to come sometime."

Dean came out to pick her up.   "Sorry, Xander."

"Not your fault.   She's in the hospital for the migraines but not fully.   Wes, we were told if she was tainted or turned into a half-demon it'd stop that."   He grimaced. "So?"   He smiled.   "I know it's her choice, I just think someone needs to give her better options for what to turn into.   I don't know, ask Spike what's doable.   He's back that way.   Or Angel."   She cooed at that name.   "Tell me what happens, Wes?   Thanks, man.   I'll hug her for all of you, yeah."   He hung up.   "They'll work on getting her to agree to a partial transformation."   He took his daughter back to hug.   "You're very comforting."   She snuggled in, knowing he needed cuddled.   Dean sat next to him, letting Xander slowly lean closer to him.   "You're good at it too."

"I don't usually cuddle because it's not the macho thing to do, but I can be comforting anyway," he offered.   Kyle's ghost appeared and shoved Dean into Xander then disappeared.   "He's nosy."

"He is," Xander agreed with a grin.   "But pretty nice."

"He was when we were younger, even if he was a bit strange and enjoyed scaring the crap out of us when we were playing."   Xander grinned up at him.   "We'll figure this stuff out, Xander."

"Sure."   He looked down, noticing she was nearly asleep.   "Aw, it's my favorite baby super power."

Dean grinned down at her.   "Mine too.   I never realized babies could be that active."

"She's lucky she's not hyperactive.   Then we'd have some problems."   He stroked over her hair, taking off the tiara.   She fussed but he put it in her hands.   She cuddled it around her bear's throat and it was good again.   Xander started to drift off against Dean's arm but she shifted and woke him up.   "We should put you down."

"You're both fine."   Xander blinked up at him. "You are.   I'm comfy."   Xander gave him a small grin, letting himself go back to being comfortable for his nap too.   Dean had to grab the phone when it rang.   "What?"   He smiled.   "Hey, Buck.   No, we still have some snow.   It snowed earlier today too.   Why?"   He stared outside.   "She thinks she set them all off.   No, I came to talk to Xander.   Why?"   He nodded.   "That's reasonable.   We forgot one of his cameras?   Sorry."   He snickered at the 'Chris was not happy at what got uncovered' retort.   "Then next time tell him not to be so nosy.   Not like Xander's going to end up on your caseload, dude.    Actually, we might need it for Cleveland or Sunnydale, not real sure yet.   We'll know in a few months.   Late April, early May."    He laughed.   "I'm sure they're hidden again, Buck, and he can always move them.   Then next time tell him that if he doesn't want to know, he shouldn't stick his nose in places it doesn't belong."

Xander took the phone.   "Buck, bite me.   Tell him he's a nosy fuck and if he keeps nagging I'm going to treat him like I do the nagging girls in my life, by growling back."   He hung up.   "Tired of that even if I do like them personally."

"We should probably find all his little cameras and hide the rest of the stuff from him," Dean offered.

Xander nodded.   "I can do that."   He looked down then carefully put her down on the couch.   He put the tiara onto the coffee table then took Dean down to help him move the weapons to the storage area underneath the garage-lik areas.   He knew Chris hadn't been in them.   He had only found them last night.   Kyle had said he forgot about them.   So they went in there and the swords got put into a safe stand so Izzy couldn't get hurt trying to play with one.   The crossbows got put into a closet hanging up properly.   Then Xander cleaned that storage area, putting the few books he found up in the library.   "That's better," he said after Dean had checked and locked the last shotgun into the new cabinet Xander had bought but not filled yet.

Dean looked around.   "Very clean."   He grinned.   "The Impala's in her usual bay.   Your truck's in the other you raised the door on so it could fit."   Xander nodded.   "Any other tasks that have to be done to get it up to home inspection standards before the other hunters get here?"

"The wards around the windows aren't finished."

"Salt?"

"Tara was doing small painted on symbols."   He took him to look at them.   "See?"

Dean nodded, finding the paint and the plans she had made in her former room.   Then they got to work on the last few windows.   By then it was lunch and Izzy was awake, watching them paint in that confused 'what do you do that for' way.   They fed themselves and went to straighten up her room and then Xander's room.   Xander looked in his closet and sighed.   Dean looked over his shoulder.   "You don't nearly fill it up."

"Which Buffy will probably complain about."

"Maybe but it's a guy thing."   He patted him on the back.   "Not like you need suits, formal wear, all that stuff.   Jeans, sweaters, and t-shirts should do for you."   He looked in the other closet, finding the sweaters and lighter jackets.   "It'll go in there if you wanted."

Xander looked then at him.   "Are you moving into my room?"

"If not, I can use a closet across the hall," he offered.

Xander blushed.   "Let's make sure we can play that way first, Dean.   I'm not sure I can play with a guy."

"Sure."   He grinned.   "Kinda new to me too, Xander.   Only tried it the once while drunk."   Xander gave him an odd look.   "I was eighteen, it was a frat party."

"Ah.   Never went to those."

"I went to get the spirit hunting one of the girls.   She got me drunk and let her brother pounce me."

Xander laughed.   "Was he nice about it?"

"Nope.   He wasn't that good either."   He winked.   "I'm much better than he was.   Even back then."   He went to get his own clothes, going to unpack in his room.   Izzy helped him with it by playing with his sneakers.   "Those probably stink, sweetheart."

"She doesn't care.   She likes shoelaces.   Keep her from chewing on them?" Xander said from the doorway.

Dean took them, getting huffed at.   He stared down at her then grinned, picking her up to sit in the suitcase.   She liked that better, handing him the last few t-shirts from it.   "You're very helpful, Izzy.   Thank you."   She beamed at her father, waving some.

"You are," Xander agreed.   "The dish is out again.   I'm going to go up and fiddle with it."

"Get the guy out?"

"We can't, he's got a sprained back from falling off the hospital's roof to do theirs."   He went to get on his outdoor clothes and hike up to fiddle with the dish.   He found it unconnected and sighed, redoing the connection.   That's when he felt the hand touch his back.   He looked back.   "Let me guess, you're a disgruntled former cable guy?"   He chanted quietly, not wanting to alarm Dean.   The spirit howled and tried to knock him over but he had anchored the ladder well.   He slid back down it and looked up.   "Nyah, nyah," he said, sticking his tongue out.   "Get over it, we can't run cable out here."

Dean opened the front door, looking up since Xander was.   "I'll be damned."

"Disgruntled former cable guy."

Dean got something and shot at the ghost, making it dissipate.   "I'll look him up so we can salt and burn him."

"The ground's way too frozen to dig," Xander told him.

"We'll figure it out, Xander."   Xander went up to reattach the dish while Dean went to look at the online verison of the local newspaper.   They had an obituary column so he could find him in there probably.   The picture on the tv went out again.   "Forgot to pay the bill?" Dean quipped.

"No, I paid it last month.   It won't come for another two days."   He went up there with a sigh to fix it again, taking the paint to paint the same marks around the dish.   The ghost huffed and tried to knock him off again but oh well.   Wasn't going to happen today.   The ghost beat at the dish.   "Dean?" he called.   Dean came up to shoot the ghost again, making Xander grin.   "Nice shot."

"Rock salt would only sting you."   He came up to look.   "Forgot a dot."   Xander looked then put the dot on, handing him off the paint and brush.   They went back inside but the picture was still down so Xander had to call in a service call while Dean finished finding the guy so they could force him from this plane.   That was really annoying of him to do to them.   Even Izzy was pouting because she couldn't watch the loud, bright stuff anymore.   The service people came out to look.   Xander shooed off the ghost again.   The sheriff showed up so he told him why.   The ghost came back to attack them but Dean got it this time since Xander was talking.

Izzy was playing in the snow watching them get irritated at the thing.   She scowled.   "Kyle!" she howled.   They all looked at her.   The ghost appeared.   She pointed.   "Mean!   Bad!"

Kyle looked at the ghost.   "Dave, don't make me kill you further."   The other ghost fled.   He grinned at the little girl.   "Shouldn't you be inside being warm?"

"Yup," Dean agreed, picking her up.   "Thanks, Kyle."

"Boy'll go more insane than I did out here without cable," he said dryly, giving him a look.   Then at Xander then at him again.   "Can't stop everything, boy."

"What did she do this time?"

"Not her.   Someone liked the idea."   He smirked and faded before Dean got him with the rock salt.   It'd hurt like a bitch he was sure.   Did when he was alive.

Dean looked at Xander, who was pale and a bit shaky.   The sheriff was holding him up.   "Xander?"

"I did *not* ask."

"I know you didn't," he agreed calmly.   "I think we need to do some testing?"   Xander shuddered but nodded.   "We'll do that tonight, after they fix the line."   They got back to work then fled the strange stuff.   They wouldn't even charge them for the call because they didn't want to remember being there.   Let the local guy do it once his back was better.

The Sheriff looked at them.   "Does that mean what I think it means?"

"It means some demon or witch decided to piss off my father possibly," Dean told him.   Xander shuddered.   "Dad won't say a word, Xander.   Not like you asked."   He let him go inside for the truck keys.   "I'll be here."   Xander nodded, stomping to the truck.   "Be careful on the road."

"I am."

Dean looked at the sheriff.   "See, we weren't shooting at the dish guys."

"No, you weren't.   You were protecting them.   Might wanna get her inside, Dean.   She's a bit pink."

Dean looked down then took her inside.   "Later, Sheriff."

"Let me know if we need to hide people from his temper."

"I will."   Dean shut the door once Xander had driven off.   That was not going to make anyone happy today.   Especially not if it was a positive test.

***

Xander stomped in two hours later.   "The doctor said I'm not."

"Good!"   He grinned.   "Excellent actually."   He handed over the sniffling girl.   "She's got the sniffles from earlier."   Xander sat down to cuddle her.   Dean gave him a shoulder nudge with a grin.   "If it happens some day, I'll go hunt whoever down to kill them."

Xander relaxed.   "Thanks for not sticking up for Willow's idea."

"I'm not against it but that should be your choice."   Xander finished relaxing.    He patted him on the arm.   "She helped me put together a casserole for dinner."

Xander looked at him.   "You can cook casseroles?"

"You put stuff into a baking dish and bake," he said dryly.   "It's like a baked version of pot luck soup."

Xander grinned.   "Thanks."

"Welcome."   He patted him on the head.   "The brownies showed up but said they'd come back later since I had no idea where the bread was."

"Freezer," he said with a moan, getting up to get some out and thaw it in the microwave.   He found the other bowls in the fridge so he warned up the honey some too, taking it outside.   One of the brownies he didn't usually see showed up to nose at it.   "It's wheat rolls with a bit of cinnamon in it," he offered with a grin.   "We're down to that and gummy white bread or the last two bagels which I can't guarantee are good."

An older female brownie appeared, sniffing at the rolls.   "Those smell like dessert."   He grinned so she grinned back.   "Not a problem, young one.   This winter has been hard, even if you do shop most of the time."

"If you guys want, we have flour and oats in some half full barrels inside," Xander offered.   "I can get you some of the stuff so you can make your own if what I'm getting isn't good enough."

"No, it's fine.   If we want to bake, we come take a bit and then leave again."   She patted his knee.   "You're a good human."

"Thank you.   Have you guys heard anything about Sunnydale falling in for this apocalypse?   I need to know if I need to send the slayer some stuff."

She considered it.   "I hadn't but we have some kin that way.   Have you?"

"We heard Sunnydale's about to close and Cleveland's opening.   If so, and it doesn't destroy the town, I know the military guys backing up the slayer are planning on it."   She grimaced.   The young one looked horrified.   "They're being practical.   Everyone would be evacuated first, but I need to know if Faith might need something like higher weapons to fight whatever apocalypse it is this time."

She stared at him.   "You do hunt, don't you?"

"I backed up the slayers Buffy, Kenda, and Faith before she went bad.   Once Izzy's a bit older I'll be backing up whoever's in Cleveland."

She nodded.   "I've heard about you.   They say you're insane."

He grinned.   "Only when you hurt my daughter."   She cackled and nodded.   "There was an unfortunate cult."

"I heard, young one.   If I should hear, I'll let you know.   Try to be safe for the young lady."

"I do try.   That's why I'm sitting out this apocalypse.   I can't find a good sitter."   She nodded at that.   "By the way, some other hunters may be sending their kids here so they can go help."

"I'll let the clan know," she promised.   "And if I hear anything."   She patted him again.   "Go back inside.   You're getting chilly."

"Thank you, ma'am.   I like you guys.   You're great neighbors and very nice."   He walked back inside grinning.

"He's a bit strange for a human but fairly nice for a hunter," she told the young one, who nodded.   "Did you get hungry?   We weren't going to come up until tomorrow."

"We ran out of sweet stuff."

"Help me carry it back.   The milk's that dried stuff but it's fairly decent and it keeps well."   They carried the things back and she made a report.   The head of the clan called their kin out that way to have them move now instead of later.   Plus to see if the boy would have to give away some of those heavy boxes he petted when he couldn't sleep.

Xander sat down beside Dean again.   "They'll warn their people that way and will tell us if Faith is going to need something huge again."

"That's cool.   You're planning on going back to hunting full time?"

"Faith's going to need a steady backup, Dean."

"I know.   When she's older?"

"Say hunting around here for a year then seeing if I can handle hellmouth duty again?"

"That's not a bad idea."

"Are you going to hunt with me around here?"

"Nearby but I might be coming and going a bit to handle a few farther flung things.   Of course if we get together, you'd come with me if we can get Sammy or Dad to babysit."

"Cool," he said with a grin back.

"I know you're not helpless or the wife, Xander.   I don't expect you to be."   He smirked down at the baby.   "Did you have to do something that smelly, Iz?"

"Apparently."   He took her to change but Dean took her back, going to change her.   Xander grinned.   That was a good sign.   Not just anyone could change her diapers and not complain.   They had made Anya flee in terror and even Tara had left a few times to get away from them.   Dawn too.

"Eww.   What did you eat this time?"

"That happens about once a week."

"It's orange."

"Carrots, Dean."

"No more of those things for you, princess."

"They're good for her."

"Still disgusting."

Xander laughed.   "I think all butt output that way is."

"Can be, yeah.   Mine's not orange though."   He came back with her changed, giving her the bear back.   "There, happier?"   She smiled and waved.   "Yes, hi.   Want to get down and wander?"   He put her onto her feet, watching her toddle off to look out the window.   She grunted and pointed.   "Visitors?"   He went to look, opening the door.   "Hey.   Xander's on the couch.   Xander, it's one of the brownies."

Xander got up to go out there.   "What's up?   Didn't like the rolls?   You can have some of the gummy white bread if it's not bad."

"No, son, they're very nice.   We like those."   The boy beamed.   "Might you know what's going on in Sunnydale?"

"I know the yearly spring apocalypse is going to be bad.   The hellmouth's been fluxing and slowly building to a grand explosion level recently.   I know that it'll probably shut down entirely and that Cleveland's been fluxing to look like it's going to open.   They haven't been keeping me in the major part of the loop of information.   That's why I asked if you guys had heard if the slayer out there needed bigger weapons."

"We haven't heard anything from the kin out there other than the bastards from the military are back."

"Only the hunting teams.   Riley's team was filling in after Buffy got turned and before we could get Faith out of jail.   Right now they're staying until the apocalypse to help her, then they're moving to Cleveland."

The old brownie nodded wisely.   "We have heard they've been rough on the local community but not as bad as they were before."

"Riley learned Buffy's methods and Faith did too.   Is she, or they, killing harmless ones?"

"A few from the military hunters.   She's not.   She seems a mite tired most of the time from what we've heard."

Xander nodded.   "She probably is.   She's been a slayer now for a long time and she's just recently out of jail.   Plus apocalypses are tiring.   They always did to me."   That got a smile and a nod.   "If you do hear, would you tell me if they're going to need something bigger?   Riley gave me macho bullcrap about how he's military and they can use their own supplies."

"Of course I will, lad.   I'll be warning our kin out there."

Xander nodded.   "Please do.   I don't want anyone who's not a bad thing to be hurt by this.   The bad things, I'll cheer because it'll make it easier but guys like you and the harmless sorts?   Not a problem.   If Willie's still out there, he might be able to pass that onto other clans too.   We're not sure if it does explode that it won't cause a small earthquake or something."

"I can pass that on too.   That way he can tell the more harmless things to overload that blasted champion in LA."

Xander grinned.   "He's not so bad now that he's gotten over his brooding over Buffy."   The brownie gave him an odd look.   "Seriously.   I was there when they were dating.   He was all brood, gloom, and doom."

"Maybe you should stay here.   It seems to be more sane."

He grinned more brightly.   "I thought that was the lack of a hellmouth."   The brownie cackled, nodding.   "Please do let me know and tell whoever you feel should know.   Like I said, I want the harmless things out of the way."

"I'll do that then.   Thank you, lad."

"I can warm up more of the rolls if you want more."

"No, we're good."   He smiled and disappeared to talk to the head of all the brownie clans.   Their council had to know about this.   "I live near a hunter who said he helped the slayers Buffy, Kendra, and Faith before she went bad," he announced, sitting down in the visitor's chair.   "He tithes us very well."

"Why is this important?" the head of the council demanded.

"Because he asked me to spread the news that the Sunnydale hellmouth might be closing and sucking in the area, possibly with a small earthquake, and it looks like Cleveland's opening."   They all stared at him, one whimpering.   He nodded.   "He asked us to see if we had heard about it and if we had heard anything about the Slayer Faith needing higher weapons to help her before she goes to Cleveland to handle that one opening.   She's got the hunters from the Initiative behind her to back her up, but the way he was talking the hellmouth's going to end the town or the military boys will if Cleveland opens."

That got a grim looking nod from them.   "We'll pass that along.   If we hear that they'll need more help from higher human weapons, we'll let you know so he has time to get her some."

"Please do.   He also suggested that if I wanted to, we could talk to some of the harmless sorts out that way so they could flee in terror and not hit the next one too."

"Not a bad idea.   It's kind of us to do," one of the other agreed, pushing back her hat. "Any idea how we'd get them word?"

"He said there's a bar called Willie's out there.   It's apparently a demon bar."   That got a nod.   "He also said he wasn't sure if it was going to explode, his word, and possibly cause a small earthquake."

"We'll warn the kin up and down that coast," the head of the council agreed.   "He tithes well?"

"He uses powdered milk because it's winter and they've had a hard one thanks to that blasted witch.   Good honey, today he gave us some wheat and cinnamon rolls for bread."   They all smiled at that.   "All we have to do is ask and he lets us sneak in to take flour and stuff whenever we need some.   He's a very nice hunter.   His daughter's adorable and keeps trying to pet us.   She thinks we're like squirrels."

The head of the council gave him an odd look.   "The lock for the realm merge?"   That one nodded.   "That's where he went?"

"When the Slayer Buffy got turned they evacuated.   One of Hunter Kyle's friends had the keys and gave them to him, probably for some of his weapons.   They've settled in and painted a lot of the old place.   Had to fix the roof a bit during a snow storm thanks to that witch.   She was trying to make him pregnant again.   So far we've blocked her spells that way."

"Good of you."

"He'd probably freak out and kill half of anyone in his way," he admitted.

"Very good of you then.   We heard how bad the last one was.   They said he had some very bad mood swings on the demons who came to talk to his daughter before she was born."

One of the other females looked at him.   "I did when someone patted my stomach and spawn."

"We remember.   You nearly caused a clan war," the head said dryly.   "Any other good news?"

"Not at the moment.   We will have some to foster out soon though."

"Good.   Let us spread that news to our people so they can be safe."   They broke to do that.   Every clan everywhere in the world would be getting that warning.   It'd be a good time to set up alignment marriages too, get some of the younger adult brownies out of the way of the packing and moving.   Fostering some of the young would help them too.   The one from the compound went back to tell his people, who went to call their own kin directly while he went to see Willie.

***

Faith looked around as she walked into Willie's that night.   "You had one of the vamps come get me?" she asked.

Willie nodded.   "That one wanted to ask you something without the commandos behind you."

"That's cool."   She looked at it.   "What are you?   I've never seen anything like you before."

"I'm a brownie, Slayer Faith.   Perfectly harmless."   She nodded, sitting next to him.   "I was given information that this hellmouth may be closing?"

"Looks like it," she agreed.   "If your kind wanna help, I'm not sure how we're doing that yet."

"Actually, I'm here to get our associated clans out of the way and to warn some of the more harmless sorts so they can flee too."

"That's pretty nice of you."

"We don't want to see them damaged.   I also came to pass on a message.   The one who tithes us wanted to know if we had heard anything about you possibly needing some of his weapons?   He said he got, and I quote, macho bullcrap from one of them when he asked them."

She snorted.   "Figures.   Riley's all macho about most things and isn't that good."   He smiled.   She smirked back.   "You tell Xander that I might need some but I'll know more in a few days.   Depending on what the new readings and the witches Rosenburg asked come up with for an idea of what's going on.   No one's seen one close like this since before the demon wars."

"I can do that," he promised.   "Oh, here."   He handed her something and enlarged it.   "We took a new picture of her.   She's quite adorable."

"She's my favorite niece," she agreed with a smile.   "Thank you.   Tell him I'll call soon."

"I can do so.   Do not worry about our kind.   We stay out of your way since we're natural creatures."

"I'd like to hear more about that since I have no idea if the Watchers know about you guys."

"They do but many ignore us as fairy tales."   He smirked.   "They also have bad herds because of it.   Oh, you might want to warn that witch if she's the same one that created the young one in the picture, to quit trying to make him have another one?   We have protected him so far but she's made it a hard winter on us in many ways, including that one."

"I'll beat her ass if she does that to him."

"Thank you, lass."   He patted her wrist.   "Good hunts to you, Slayer.   Let him know."   He disappeared.

She looked at Willie.   "I always thought brownies were just littler girl scouts."

"No, they're some of the little people.   Very natural spirits," he offered.   "That one apparently lives near Harris and his paranoid compound."

"Hey, I like his compound.   It's quiet in a good way.   Izzy loves snow too.   Sneaks out to play all the time."   Willie walked off shaking his head with a groan.   Faith took the picture with her, handing it to Buffy.   "X needs to know if we need higher weapons."

"Riley said he can get some from their stores."

Faith looked at her.   "The right thing?"

"Maybe," she admitted. "How did we get a new Izzy picture?   Xander's not back, right?"

"No, I met a brownie.   Not a little girl scout but a little person brownie."   Buffy gaped.   "He thinks she's adorable too."   Buffy giggled and Faith grinned.   "He's telling all his associated kin what's going on so they move out.   Some of the harmless ones too."

"That's going to be handy."

"Probably, yeah.   He also said X got macho bullshit from Riley when he asked him."

"I'll whine at him later," Buffy promised, handing the picture back.   "Any other good news?"

"They've been keeping X from getting knocked up again thanks to Red.   She's made the winter hard on all of them in many ways according to him."

"Beyond the extra large snow storm to lock him and Dean in with six ATF agents, John, and Sam?"   Faith nodded.   "Huh.   Interesting."

"Can't you bite her or something?"

"Yeah, I probably can.   I wonder if witches taste good for more than a snack and if that's ethical."

"X is going to eat her for real if she knocks him up again."

"Good point."   She went to find Riley and swat him.   "Xander is very helpful and if we want to use his, we can."   He sulked off, nodding slightly.   "He can probably get us stuff he's got stored without having to fill out paperwork and the ATF agents who were taking the mines from his lawn might like that."

Riley gave her an odd look.   "They're still doing that?"

"He had billions of mines on the lawn, Riley."

"Oh."

"Willow even snowed most of them in with the Winchesters trying to get Dean and Xander together."

He shuddered.   "That's just...wrong."

"No, I'm going to bite her for the other wrong stuff.   Like trying to knock Xander up again."   She bounced off.   She was kinda hungry and Willow had donated but now she was involved in some spell work.   She found Tara and grinned.   "The brownies have been keeping Xander from being pregnant and she's screwed up their winter *way* too much according to the one who talked to Faith."

Tara looked at her girlfriend.   Then at Buffy.   "I like the brownie clan that lives near him.  They're very nice."

"So Faith said.   One met her at Willie's.   They're clearing out their people in case we go all 'splody."

"Good."   She glared at Willow, making her shrink back.   "I...."   She sighed and controlled her temper.   "I don't believe in beating people."   She grabbed her sweater and left.

Faith stopped her.   "It's cool, T.   We'll keep you two apart."   Tara gave her a sad smile and shook her head.   "Wait to huff off, okay?   We might need a good witch for the apocalypse."

"I'll be in Cleveland until then.   I'll come back for it and then go back with you," she offered quietly.

"That'll work," she promised.   "Don't worry, B wanted to eat her."

"I want to beat her," Tara admitted.   "I don't believe in spousal abuse though."   She smiled sadly.   "Call, Faith."   She left, going to find the other Winchesters.   They were at Bobby's.    She coughed to announce her presence when she appeared magically, getting a smile from Sam and Bobby.   "Can I hitch a ride to Cleveland until Sunnydale goes off?"

"Sure, Tara," Bobby promised.   "She piss you off again?"

"The brownies are saying Willow nearly hurt them this winter and they're still trying to stop her from making him pregnant."   She sat down, pouting.   "I don't trust myself not to hurt her.   I don't want to, I know it's wrong, but I want to so bad."

"Me too," Sam promised, giving her a hug.   "You can help me for a while.   I'm without Dean."   She smiled, nodding slightly.   "Is he?"

"Not so far."

"Good!" John agreed.   "After the apocalypse, maybe we'll be having another talk with her."   Tara blushed, shrugging a bit.

Bobby got up.   "Let me make up a bed for you, Tara."

"I can sleep on the couch," she promised.

"Good girls and ladies like you get the guest room," he said firmly.   "Its only polite.   Sammy can sleep on the couch because he's a guy."   She blushed, but shrugged at Sam, who only gave her a squeeze and helped Bobby change sheets on the guest bed.

John called LA.   "Angel, it's Winchester.   Is Rosenburg there?   Even the brownies are complaining about how she did them this winter and how often they've had to block the spell to knock back up Xander again."   He listened.   "Then I'm sure Buffy can eat her just fine for us after the apocalypse."   He smirked.   "She's here with us to go to Cleveland.  She'll probably be back out for the apocalypse then travel back with us.   Sure, I can tell her that.   Have a better night."

"Tell him the brownies were warning the harmless demons and their kin to flee," Tara called.

"Heard that?   Tara said the brownies near Xander were warning their kin and the harmless demons to flee."   He nodded.   "Happy it's not my town," he said dryly when Angel said he was too happy about that. "Good luck."   He hung up.   "He'll pass that around.   Buffy will be dealing with her after the apocalypse, Tara."

Upstairs, Sam gave her a hug.   "You could never be like your parents, Tara.   You're not that sort and your soul is good.   You know how bad it is to abuse your girlfriend.   That's why you walked away," he promised, letting her cry on his shoulder.   "You'd never turn into them.   I know you won't."   He sat down to let her cuddle.

Bobby left them alone.   He knew she'd be embarrassed about that but it was needed.   "She's crying on Sammy," he said quietly.   "She was scared she'd go like her father."

"I doubt that'd happen.   Tara's a good girl with a good soul," John said.   "Though, do we know her family?"

Bobby shrugged.   "Xander might."

"I'll write him to see if they're hunters."   He did that from his son's phone and put it back down to finish charging.   Sam came down a bit later to make the couch up for himself.   "She asleep?"   Sam nodded.   "That's fine.   She probably needs it."

"She wore herself out."   He sat down again.   "Can I beat her family too?"

"Sure," John agreed.   "Go for it."   His son gave him an evil smirk.   "Let Xander help if you want."

"Buffy nearly did the last time they met from what I heard," he admitted.   That got a nod from John because that cemented his opinion about them.   "She'll be fine but we should introduce her to some nice girls.   She could use a nice, calm, loving girlfriend who was supportive and liked to play with her kitty, Miss Kitty."

"Miss Kitty?" Bobby asked with a grin.

"Miss Kitty Fantastico.  She's presently living with Fred until Tara can find her a solid place to stay."

"Girlish name but I suppose it suits her cat," he decided.   "Let me turn in.   John?"   He nodded, heading to his own bed.   Sam laid down on the couch, getting up to move a lamp before he kicked it by accident in the middle of the night.

***

Xander watched some of the snow melt a few weeks later, nearly whooping in pleasure.   "Look, Izzy.   It's brown and green!" he said, picking her up to show her.   She pouted at the missing snow.   "I know you like snow but you'll like dirt too.   I promise you will.   Probably mud too."    He dressed them for outside and took her out to play in the fading snow.   She enjoyed it and it'd have to last her until the next winter.   If they were in Cleveland, they had snow there too.   If not, they might be snowed in up there again.   He saw a truck pull in that he didn't recognize.   "Dean?" he called.   He came out of the library, he had been looking up something for Bobby.   "Do we know them?"

"Nope."   He waited until they parked and got out.  The African-American woman was well known to him.  He'd hunted with her once   "Never mind, yeah I do.   Amanda."   He walked down to shake her hand.   "What's up?"

"Ellen said we could stash some of the kids here for the apocalypse in Cleveland?"

"Sure can," Xander agreed.   He looked at his daughter, who beamed at him since more kids were coming out of the truck.   "We can finish playing in the snow in a bit," he decided, picking her up.   "I've got a few good spare spaces.   We'll let the kids and parents decide where they're bunking."   She nodded, following them inside with her two girls.   "Will they need school stuff?"

"Nah, they're out for the year.   I home schooled."   She smiled at her girls.   "I remember when you two were that little."

Dean grinned.   "She's a good baby most of the time.   Even if she did try to see if I wore diapers earlier by trying to get into my clothes."

"All babies do that," Amanda said wisely, pushing her shoulder-length brunette hair back behind her ear.   Xander showed her the bunker area then the other two rooms down there, plus Tara's former room since it had room for a sleepover and was in a more girlish design.   "This is nice."

"A friend was here until the quiet drove her nuts too," Xander said with a grin.   That got a laugh and a nod.   "They can camp here, or in the bunker area."

"I know a few people who'd like that for theirs but mine are pretty good about not being paranoid yet."

"That's fine," Xander agreed, looking at the girls.   "Want to camp out in here while your mom's in Cleveland?"

"Aunt," she corrected.

Xander nodded.   "Sorry."

"It's okay."   She looked at the pouting baby.   "We can go back outside, little one."

"Isabelle or Izzy," Xander said, holding her up better.   "C'mon, you can have some more snow."   She grinned because they headed back up there.   "If we get that overloaded, there's a few extra beds up here.   Ellen never said, how many do we think are coming?"

"Probably about six total."   She looked at Dean.   "Is that the one John was complaining about?"

"Yup.   She's got him wrapped around her finger too.    He's a very cooing, reading to her sort of grandfather."   Amanda laughed.   Xander gave him a look.   "I'm sure Ellen told her."

"Yup.   How did she come to be?"

"Magic," Xander admitted.   "When the realms merged thanks to a wish demon, they needed a lock.   So I got pregnant."

Amanda moaned.   "No wonder John complained."

"Yup, a lot.   I'm not exactly the daughter-in-law he wanted," he quipped back.   She cackled, nodding.   "We're pretty good though."

"How many of Kyle's mines are still up?" she asked.

"None as far as we know.   We'll be making sure of that this spring.   I put some new ones up around the fence since a cult was started to Izzy," he said dryly, giving her a look.   She nodded at that, smiling a bit.   "Most of them are now out of jail but now and then a deer steps on one to get some grass.    Got one on Thanksgiving thanks to that."   He put his daughter back down, letting her crawl over to the bigger snow pile.   "Not too far."

"She's fine," Dean assured him.   He pulled out a few of the porch chairs for the adults to sit on.   "When are you hitting Cleveland?"

"Two days," she sighed.   "My assigned area's on the other side of town, thankfully not that dangerous.   I heard your family's got the prime spot?"

"All three of us and Bobby.    The slayer when she gets there."   She gave him an odd look.   "He's *that* Xander.   Willow was cleaning her hands and mumbling about how other hunters would understand her better," he finished dryly.

"Huh.   Makes sense now.   She end up going bad?"

"All winter long," Xander said dryly, giving her a look.   "She decided her idea to fix us up was to strand us up here by snowing us in."

"Oooh.   Yeah, Kyle used to say winters drove him nuts up here."

"With Buck's ATF team," Dean added.   "Plus Dad and Sammy."   She whimpered.   "He likes Buck.   They're the ones who came up to get the mines when Dad called.   Izzy, no going farther," he ordered.   She pouted but settled in her snow pile with the two girls.   "We'll keep them as safe as we can.   Kyle's still floating around here watching over us.   Izzy's so brilliant she called on Kyle to get the ghost that was bothering the dish and trying to knock Xander off the ladder."   She gaped, then swallowed.   "He tied himself to the house.   He's been pretty good about playing with her."

"Kyle always was a bit strange," she decided.    "Why aren't you going to Cleveland, Xander?"   He pointed at Izzy.   "No one to watch her?"

"Not with Bobby and John there.   I might try to rejoin the team this summer if we can step in during a quieter time so she's safe while I set up some precautions out there."

"That's a reasonable, parent thing to do," she agreed.   "Frankly half of us would've had to send our kids to Ellen so we could've went.   We're hoping it's not as bad as we think."

Xander got up to get the last fax from the Sunnydale/LA team, handing it over.   "That's what we know for sure."

She read it over, whimpering some.   "Damn.   Does Buck or someone higher know?"

"We've told Buck so he can tell whoever out there might have a clue," Dean assured her.   "We're pretty sure Sunnydale is going to turn into a hole in the ground after this."

"One way or another," Xander agreed.   His daughter made begging noises, looking up at him and holding up her arms.   "Usually you like snow."   He came over to look at her, frowning.   "That's not good.   Dean, one of the brownies has blood on him I think.   I'm seeing little bloody footprints."

"Huh."   He came down to look.   "That's not right.   Can we call them?"

"I don't know.   Hey, brownie elders?" he called.   One appeared a few minutes later.   "Izzy found footprints of one of you with some blood.   Do we need stitching materials or something?   I can stitch."

He looked then grimaced.   "Not all little people are nice, lad.   That's probably from one of them.   You let us handle it."

"Is it safe to let her play?"

"They're night creatures," he assured him.

"Thank you.   Let me know if I can help."

"Of course."   He smiled and disappeared, going to send out his people to hunt that thing down.   Before it returned the favor and killed his clan.   "Harris found Blood Elf tracks," he announced.   The hunters gathered their weapons and headed off to search their lands for it.   The elder females took in all the kids to keep them safer.   He went to watch the house.   Evil was drawn to the boy.   This one might not be any different.

Xander looked back at the stunned hunter.   "We like the brownies.   They're very good neighbors.   They warned us a few times when someone tried to come over the fence to get Izzy."

"He tithes them all the time," Dean agreed.   Kyle faded in.   "Did you tithe the brownie clan?"

"Now and then when they needed something.   Best to leave the harmless things alone."   Amanda nodded at that.   He looked at her with a grin.   "Last time the boy gave them toaster strudels."

She giggled.   "Those are nice for breakfast."

Xander grinned.   "They said they liked them."   He looked at his daughter, moving her away from the tracks.   "There, play in clean snow, Izzy."   The other two shifted with him.  "Should I worry about setting up for another adult in the house too?"

"Ellen might be sending Jo to help or Jo might be handling the ones that'll be dropped off there," she said.   "Don't know yet."   Xander nodded.   "I'll tell Ellen you're pretty well set up for them to start coming."   She stood up and dusted off.   "Kiss me then I'm gone," she ordered.

"You can stay tonight if you need to," Xander assured her.

"Not necessary.   They've had to be sat by Ellen a few times."   She patted him on the cheek.   "You're a sweet boy, Xander."   She hugged her nieces and then left to head to Ellen's.    It was a good day's drive.

Xander looked at the girls.   "When you're cold we'll go in and have cocoa then set you guys up to camp.   All right?"   They nodded, going back to playing with the baby.   He sat down beside Dean, watching them play.   "I guess your dad had to do the same thing?"

"Yup.   We stayed with Kyle a few times, with Bobby a lot.   With Ellen a few times too."   He patted him on the arm.   "It'll be okay, Xander.   We can handle it."   Xander grinned. "I'll head for Cleveland once Sunnydale falls in."   That got a nod.   "That way I'm there for that main event and you're not alone with a houseful of kids too early.   And if Jo comes, let her change the nasty diapers."   They smirked at that.   Izzy pouted because her snow wasn't sticking like usual so they got the kids inside to clean up, get some cocoa, and make up Tara's former bed for the girls.

***

Sam looked up as his father opened the door to let Dean in.   "Hey.   How's Izzy?"

"She's good.   Pouting because all her snow melted.    The brownie clan is happier because they finally killed the blood elf that came to get them.   They had hid their kids in the house for a few days to finish hunting it down.   It tried to get in to see Izzy too; said she was adorable."

"Everyone thinks she's adorable," John said.   "Any other good news?"

"Kiara dropped her heathens off on Jo," he said with an evil smirk.   "He's got Amanda's, Dave's, and Charles' kids with Larry there at the moment."

"Not too many then," John said.   "He okay with them?"

"They're being good.   Amanda's nieces are treating Izzy like a huge doll to play with.   Xander and I made bribery bags for good behavior while Charles was saying goodbye to his horde of little heathen future hunters.   One wanted to salt and burn Kyle but Charles had to tell him about him.   So he's cool with that.   The rest are at the Roadhouse giving Jo a reason for birth control."   John smirked at that.   "Some are."

"You two were a few times too," he assured him.   "Xander all right?"

"Fine.   He sent Faith some emergency weapons through Tara the day Sunnydale went down.   It's fully gone.   We got pictures from the military guys."   That got a nod.   He handed over the disk from his bag.   "Compressed video."   Sam moved to his laptop to play it.   "So we're cool.   Buck was threatening to show up to check on the mines since the snow's all melted.   She took the phone and demanded to have Ezra."

"Still?" John asked.

"Chanted his name until Buck handed him the phone so she could coo and ask him for a story," he said with a grin.

John laughed.   "Good to know.   Any other cheery news?"

"Willow evacuated Faith to the house.   She's asleep in the car."   He sat down, sighing a bit.   "The hellmouth opened and it had to be closed.   Buffy closed it by walking into it.   Xander's kinda depressed.   He spent the night we heard hugging Izzy so much she complained she was being smooshed but she knew he needed it so she only old him to let her breathe a few times."

"Full sentences?" Sam asked.

"Breathe, daddy."

Sam grinned.   "Good girl.   The military guys get out?"

"Yeah.   They had a vehicle waiting and ran for it when the hellmouth started to suck.   Faith was too close so Willow blipped her to the compound.   Angel's went off without too many issues from what Xander got from them.   This sitting out is killing him."

"If it's safer here, he's more than welcome to come back," Sam said.   He got up to look outside, waving since he saw Faith out of the car.   He opened the door.   "Faith, up here."   She came up the stairs.   "Dean was letting you finish your nap."

"I needed it."   She patted him on the cheek.   "How bad is it?" she asked.

"Very," John said, letting her see their scouting reports.   "It's been visibly flashing most nights.   I can show you it later on.   Tara?"

"Here somewhere avoiding Red."   That got a nod. "You heard about B?"

"I did.   I'm sorry you lost her, Faith.   I know having you both helped you both out."

"Yeah, well, now she's happier.   No more having to figure out if she wants to wear vamp leather or her Buffy special clothes."   She shrugged it off.   "Red's torn up but I'd expect that."

"Xander tried to hug her but she nearly panicked and left," Dean admitted.   That got a nod.   "The kids are safe there.   They all wanted to hear stories from Faith."

"Creeped me out," Faith admitted.

"They hear stories about hunting, like my boys did once they knew about it," John told her.

"I told them mild stuff.   Xander told them about Angel."   Dean snorted, shaking his head.  "The edited version of course.   None of the 'losing my soul for the sex' part."    She sat down on the foot of a bed.   "How long do we have?"

"Four days," Sam said.   "Plenty of time for you to rest."

Dean nodded.   "You can have the other bed in my room, Faith," he promised.   "No strings."

"Thanks, Dean."   She grinned at him.   "Being a daddy is mellowing you pretty well."

"Nah.   Dad raised us to be gentlemen.   Most of the time."   He smirked.   She smirked back.   "Let me get us a room and we'll go scouting?"   She nodded at that.   "Then dinner?"

"Sounds good.   That hot pocket for lunch was a long time ago."   He nodded, going to get them a room.   "Izzy's treating all the other kids like an extended daycare."   They smiled.   "It's doing her good to play with the other kids.   Keeps her from being a hair pulling heathen princess."

"You okay?" John asked.

"Sore, tired, and did I mention sore?" she asked.   John smiled, nodding a bit.   Sam got her something.   She sniffed the moaned.   "Straight on the muscles?"

"Yup, and this stuff you soak in," he offered, handing it over.   "This place has semi-decenttubs."

"Thanks, Sammy."   She gave his head a soft nudge then went to find their room's bathroom so she could soak away the aches and pains.   Even a girl like her needed a bubble bath now and then.   She helped Dean carry his stuff up to the room and let him use it before hogging it.

"I'll be with Dad and Sammy," he called.   He headed over there, finding Bobby was in too. "Hey."

"Hey.   How's he handling the little ones?"

"So far okay.   He only scowled at one kid who wanted to rip up the books.   She pouted and handed it back before toddling off to get Izzy to protect her from the mean scowl.   Charles' littlest one," he said at the confused looks.

"Ah, yes.   Larry's last spawn.   I remember she had colic so bad it drove off a werewolf trying to attack them."

"Yup, her," Dean agreed.   "She's a picky eater too.   Only wanted corn and broccoli for some reason until she saw Izzy's plate.   She snatched some then wanted it.   Xander had to chastise her for snatching Izzy's plate but got her her own and it was better.   His older ones have manners.   I don't know what's wrong with her."

"Larry's wife used to teach the others," John said.   "She left him when he started to sleep with his hunting partner."

"Ah, that reason.   That's more reasonable," Dean decided.   "How bad really, guys?"

"We're going to be lucky if we don't have to flee this one," John admitted, looking over the reports.   He let Dean see them.   "Faith in the tub?"

"Yeah.   Used the little bottle of bubble bath too."   He read them, groaning mentally.   "Has anyone who's native to a hellmouth looked at these?   It might be normal for one."

"I can't find Rupert to ask him," Bobby admitted.

"He's in LA getting stone drunk from losing Buffy," Dean admitted.   That got a sigh and a nod.   "He thinks of them like his kids, guys.   Don't be too hard on him for that one.   I know Willow's around here somewhere."

"She's been shunned a bit since Amanda told the others how Izzy came to be," Sam admitted.   "Most of them want her to head to Devon and stay there."

"Might do her good anyway," Dean agreed.   He called Xander.   "If I send you the current scouting reports, can you apply some hellmouth logic to it?"   He grinned, going to the office to do that.   "Why is Izzy crying?"   He winced.   "Can it be fixed?   If not, I'll pick her up one on the way home.   I know they're cheap metal."   He made a mental note of the name.   "Sure, I can do that.   Thanks, Xander."   He hung up before walking in.   "Hey.   I need to fax these home please."   The machine got pointed to.   He paid for it and sent it over, then went back upstairs.   "One of the kids accidentally broke her tiara."

John groaned.   "She throwing a fit?"

"Fussing and crying," Dean admitted.   "Xander's trying to fix it.   If not, I'll pick her up a new one."

"That's sweet," Sam agreed.   "We can put the original up so she can look at it."   That got a nod.   Dean's phone rang so he grabbed it.   "It's Sam.   Hey, Xander.   Hi, Izzy.   Are you all right, princess?"   He grinned.   "That's my good girl.   I love you too and I'll see you in a few weeks.   Okay?"   He grinned.   "After this, I think we're all heading there," Sam told him.   "Anything?"   He handed the phone to Bobby, who sat down at the small, ubiquitous motel room table to make notes.    "I figure we can descend on the house to hand back the kids and then visit?" he asked his father since he was giving him an odd look.   "Especially for recuperation time?"

"That'd work for me."   Bobby hung up.   "Normal, bad?"

"Fairly bad but he has an idea of what's hyping all that we've seen since he said most of them are in the same class according to Wesley and the books he has.   If we can find one of these," he said, handing over his notes.   "We can stop the problems."   That got a nod and they went to hunt down that demon, telling the other hunters to be on the lookout for it.

Tara and Willow showed up later with one floating behind Willow.   "One bad guy of the moment."   She let it thump down in the warehouse the hunters were using as a staging area.   "I broke his link to all the ones he's summoned here.   Half have run."

Bobby smiled.   "That's helpful, Willow.   Thank you."

"Not a problem."   She looked at the other reports, pointing at something.   "We need to do a patrol that way.   Is Faith in?"

"In the tub soaking some of the soreness away," Dean told her.   "She's got the other bed in my room."   A few of the hunters gave him an odd look.   "She was just in Sunnydale, guys.   Faith's the slayer."

"She's a pretty girl," one offered.

"Yeah but she's not interested."   That got a nod and they got back to it.   "We can run a staking vamp hunt," he offered, looking at Sam, who nodded he could go.

"Good," Willow said.   "Take these two areas," she said with a point.   "They've been coming up in that area.   If you catch a nest....."

Dean held up a hand to interrupt her.   "I have stuff from Xander, Willow."   She huffed. "Including that nice dayglo grenade to throw into a nest if we need it and some garlic bombs."

"Okay.   Call if you need more help.   I can come float stakes with the best of them."

"We will," Sam assured her.   She grinned at him.   "Any other problem areas for tonight?"

"One.   This diner has had a lot of bigger, meaning larger not more powerful, demons in there eating dinner and freaking out the waitresses recently.   We might need to keep an eye on them and shoo them off or something."

"If they're bothering humans they can go," one of the hunters said.

"A few are harmless," she retorted. "They just look scary."

"I was at that diner.   It's got a demon in the kitchen," John told them.   "Fairly harmless sort.   He babbled that he had three kids he had to take care of when he spotted me.   Begged me not to end him because he was doing right by his kids and working like a good father, not bothering anyone."

"Then they might think it's the new demon hangout," Sam said.   That got a few nods.   "We can talk to them, Tara?"   She nodded quickly.   "Thanks.   Bobby?"

"I can take her with me.   Could use a good dinner anyway."   She grinned. "So could you, young lady.   You've lost weight.   Xander's going to fuss."

"I'll gain it back by then," she promised quietly.

"Good.   Izzy's already fussing because her crown broke."

She pouted.   "Poor thing.   We'll have to get her another one."   Willow gave her an odd look.   "Cordy and Dawnie bought it for her."

"She tried to shoplift it so they bought it for her," Dean added.

She rolled her eyes.   "She's not that sort of princess."

"Now and then all girls are," John told her.   "That's why I'm glad I have sons."   They both smirked evilly at him.   "He take her out on that vile holiday?"

"Yup," Dean agreed.   "He said he was happy there wasn't any chaos sorcerers around."

Willow shuddered.   "I'm so glad he lives in a null area."

"It was nice.   He still has some of her candy hid from her," Sam said with a grin.   "She went as a fairy princess this year."   They all shook their heads when he pulled out a picture.   Though they agreed, she was adorable.

They broke up to go on their patrols, Bobby taking Tara's arm to escort her out to his car.   She smiled at him and they chatted quietly about research stuff on the way.   She had a pretty good hand at it.   She had even cleaned up his library area and reshelved his books on him when she couldn't sleep one night.   Now he could find things again.   It was sweet of her to do.

Willow pouted.   "My witch."

Sam looked at her.   "Don't make me hit you, Willow."   She glared.   He glared back, making her back away slowly.   "I got to hold her while she cried over your last thing.   She was so sure she was going to go bad like her family did," he hissed.   "Do not make me protect her."   She nodded, nearly fleeing from him.   He grabbed some stakes.   "My car or yours, Dean?"

"Mine's here.   Is yours?"

"No."   He went to take his usual spot in the Impala.   "Are you and Xander working out okay?" he asked once Dean had gotten them moving.

"Slowly but it's been okay."   That got a smile and a nod.   "Kyle's pushed him into me a few times so apparently he likes the idea.   She likes Kyle to come play with her.   He's teaching her how to play in the mud."   Sam laughed.   "It was a mess the day we left.   We had to help Xander give baths.   Everyone looked like Pigpen."

"It's good she's happy."   He shifted to look at his brother.   "How about on the more...personal front?"

"Not there yet.   Kyle gave him a book on gay sex the first night since we both said we hadn't really done a lot with the subject.   So far he's snuck and read some of it but we're taking that slow and we couldn't do it with the kids in the house."

"I'm sure their parents would appreciate that."

"Charles told Xander to pounce me," he said dryly.   "Their kids liked that idea."   Sam groaned, shaking his head.   "How's hunting going?"

"Okay for the moment.   I've had Tara with me.   She's a pretty good hunting partner.   She scowled at one creature when it went after another she was healing and it ran off in fear."

"She's a good witch," Dean agreed.

"No, she was scowling and it was fierce.   It begged her not to scowl at it again before I shot it."   Dean laughed.   "Six more days of this then the apocalypse is over."

"For about a year," Dean agreed.   "Xander still wants to come back."

"I guess that'll depend on how bad the local area becomes."

"Buck said he told the locals here who know something about hunting and the strange stuff what's going on.   With what's happened, they were talking about a mandatory evacuation around the hellmouth.   A gas line break or something thanks to the lights."

"That could help but it can't last for six days."

"That's what they're working out now."   That got a nod.   "Did you see that film?"

"I did.   It was horrifying watching it suck in the town."   He shuddered.   "Xander all right?"

"Really upset.   They were friends."

"I know.   I'll talk to him later tonight, after the kids are down."   They got to their first cemetery and got out, going to patrol it.   They ran into an officer, who also had a stake and was giving them a very odd look.   "Souvenirs too?" he asked blandly.

"Boys, are you in town for the problems?"   They nodded.   "Helping?" he added.

"We're hunters," Dean told him.   He sighed and relaxed.   "There's a bunch of us in town right now, Officer.   Any problems here?"

"Some.   A few of us realize what's going on."   He grimaced.   "We don't know why."

"Did you ever see a show called Buffy?" Sam asked.   That got a slow nod so Sam walked him off to tell him about the local hellmouth while Dean got the vampire coming up.   They went on when he went to tell the others who were worried.   They'd definitely be helping those agents who were going to find a way to protect the locals.   Sam called John to let him know that and they went on.   Staking as they went.   Which wasn't that much fun.   "No wonder they chatted and gossiped," Sam said finally.

"Thankfully we're not girls or in high school," Dean said dryly.   "I don't think I ever *gossiped*, Sammy."

"Now and then I got some from the other kids."   He shrugged and they walked on.   They did follow one of the vamps back to a lair.   Dean got weapons so they could take on the nest and it was better.   More like hunting to him.   They reported that and went to join Bobby at the diner with Tara.   There were a few of the harmless demons there.   The waitress looked a bit nervous.   Dean stared at her.   "We don't care if you're the harmful sort as long as you're not actively hunting," he told her bluntly.   She gave him an odd look.  "Like I haven't run into a succuba before," he snorted.

"Why are we having a build up?" she demanded.

"The hellmouth's getting ready to open," Sam told her.   She groaned, walking off to get herself some pie.   "Can we have some pie too?" he called after her.   "And coffee?"   They went to join Tara and Bobby.   "One nest, sixteen other vamps, and one officer who had a clue because he was out to patrol too."

"Good," Bobby agreed.   "I talked to Buck.   He said they're going to pull an evac around the hellmouth the night before.    That gives us some safety cushion."   That got a nod from the boys.   The waitress brought them their pie and left again, coming back with coffee cups.   "Thanks, miss."

"Not a problem."   She walked off to refill the other demons' cups too.   Now that she knew they weren't going to bring hunters here, she was much more relaxed.   She turned to look at them.   "Where's Rosenburg, Harris, and Summers?"

"Buffy closed the Sunnydale hellmouth," Sam said quietly.   "She had to walk into it to do it."   That got a shudder.   "That's what started the sucking."

"Faith's here," Dean told her.   That got a relaxed waitress/succuba.   "Rosenburg's here somewhere but we're not on friendly terms after some of her fuck ups recently.   Xander's got his daughter in Montana guarding some of the other hunters' kids for safety reasons.   If he can, he'll be here this summer."

She grimaced.   "We could use him.   He always seems to be able to make it slow down."

"His daughter's only fifteen months," Dean told her.

"Awww."   Sam pulled out a picture.   She grinned.   "That's an adorable baby."

"Everyone says that," Sam said with a grin.    She patted him on the head.   "Hopefully we can take Xander's place this time."

"Hopefully," Tara agreed.   "Xander has a rep?"

"For screwing things up so your side wins," she agreed.   "He's screwed up so many prophecies."

"Is this one a prophecy situation?" Sam asked.

"Not that I've heard.   If so, we might need him anyway.   Hellmouth babies have strange ways of doing things.   Especially since most don't hunt."   She strolled off to the kitchen again.

Tara dug into her dinner.   "The demon cooking does very well."

"It is good pie," Dean agreed, digging in again.   "Think we'll need him?" he asked Bobby.

"There's other hellmouth babies and ones that can use magic," Tara said quietly.   They stared at her.

"Geek trio," Dean said, snapping his fingers.

"Andrew," Sam agreed.   He called someone to help them find him, in case they needed backup for Tara.   Warren was already over the deep end but Andrew and Jonathan should be okay to work with.   And they seemed to be good enough to be on the same side.   Even if they did do things to make the world want to be owned by them on the show.

***

Willow appeared in the dingy motel room, looking at the three boys.   "I don't know why they wanted you on the new hellmouth," she said dryly.   "But they wanted to know if you wanted to help, Andrew and Jonathan."

Warren pouted.   "Not me?"

"No.   You have evil bastard written in your aura."   He pouted worse.   She looked at Andrew.   "Like Cleveland?"

"It's a pretty enough city," he agreed.   "Why?"

"That's where it's opening."

He swallowed.   "Where's Xander?"

"Isabelle," she said dryly.   "And a few other kids that belong to hunters."

"Shoot."

"But you were born there too," Warren told him.   Andrew nodded.   "Jonathan was born just outside of town.  You can be Neville to Xander's Harry."

"Exactly," Willow agreed.   "We think a hellmouth born person might help.   Therefore," she said dryly. "Pack.   It's going off in six days."   They scrambled.   She wrote down an address.   "I'm here.   Come find me, boys."   They nodded and she went back to report that she had found them, they weren't that far away and could make it in time.

"I want her spell book," Andrew pouted.

"Why?   Do you want to knock Harris up with another baby?" Warren asked.   "We all know she did."

"Eww," Jonathan said, shuddering.   "That's just wrong on so many levels!"

"Very," Andrew agreed.   "Thankfully he has the weapons skills or he'd have zeroed out his macho skill points."   They nodded, hurrying out to their van to head to Cleveland.   It meant they were recognized for the geniuses they were!   It was so cool!   Hunters wanted them!   They *needed* them!

***

Dean was in his assigned spot when Andrew walked up to him.   "Andrew."

"Weren't you on a show?"

"Realm merge, dude."

"Oh.   That makes sense.   What's going on?"

He pointed.   "Back Tara up."

"Gladly."   He went to talk to her.   "Hi."   She smiled shyly at him.   "I'm Andrew.   I grew up around Xander and Willow."   She shook his hand.   "What're we doing?"

"Backing up Willow," she said quietly.   "In case it goes rogue."

"We can do that.   My brother was a warlock so I learned some."   She gave him a hug and he relaxed.   "Thanks."

"Willow is too," she said quietly.   "I love her even though she is."   He beamed because she understood.   She pointed.   "It keeps doing that."

He watched it flare then pulse a few times before closing.   "That can't be good.   Ours never did that.   We would've noticed it doing that in the library, even though we never went in there."   She giggled.   "We didn't.   Mr. Giles didn't stock graphic novels so I never went."   It pulsed and sent up another flare.   "How long?"

"A few hours," she said quietly.   "There'll be demons coming to try to open it fully.   They have those," she said when he looked around.   He nodded and they moved to a better watching spot.   It pulsed another time, a longer pulse this time.   Demons came rushing in.   The hunters moved to take them out.   Willow moved to contain the hellmouth.   "Oh, no," she whispered, pointing.   "Kraken tentacle.   It's the guardian.   It's open!" she called.   "Oh, hellfire."

He took her hand because she was shaking.  It was the nice guy thing to do.  "How do we close it?"   She found it in her pocket, letting him see it.   They kept their hands together and chanted it, making it snap closed once Willow joined in.   Willow's hair bleached.   She slowly backed away.   Andrew and Tara shared a look then ran closer to handle it since Willow apparently wasn't.   They did it again and the thing snapped shut with a whirlwind and a shrieking noise.   He panted, looking at her.   "Wow."

"Very."   She smiled.   "You do that very well."

He grinned back.   "It's nice to be appreciated."   She gave him another hug.

"You two mix pretty well together," Bobby said, coming up behind them.   They turned and Tara raised a hand, a glow starting on it.   "Now, now, Tara.   You know me."

"Bobby was wearing different clothes."

Andrew looked at her.   "Okay."   He joined in and they blasted the higher demon off.   Then she ran off to find him.   He followed, needing to protect her for some reason.   She was cute too, even if she did like girls.   She found Bobby and hugged him.

"Hey now.   What's wrong?" he said, pushing her back.

"A demon pretended to be you."

"They do like to do that," he said dryly, smirking at her.   She backed up.   "Tara."

John looked over.   "This is him post battle, kids."   He looked at them.   "You two do make a good pair it looks like.   Some dark, some light, a bit tainted on both sides."   They gaped at him.   "Covens tend to go for a balance of skills, kids.   You two seem to make a good team."   They smiled and looked at each other but shrugged.   "Good.   It'll be good for the city to have you two helping it."   They nodded, going to find Willow.   He called Dean's phone.   "Where are you?"   He grimaced.   "She okay?"   He nodded.   "Good idea."   He followed the instructions with Bobby, finding Willow sobbing in a little ball.   One of the senior witches from Devon came running.   They couldn't help in the battle but they could take the fragile witch home with them.   "I think it's a torment."

"One of the Furies," Dean said quietly.   Sam groaned, walking off shaking his head.   "I saw one of the ones from LA."   The witch nodded, taking her off with Tara and Andrew's help.   "We done?"

"Mostly," John said.   "We need to watch for more coming to worship or try to reopen it."   They looked at the small spot in the park then went back to guarding it for the night. It was a long night of slaying.

***

Xander heard the cars and nearly ran outside.   "Guys, the blood elves are gone and the kids are all right.   I made sure they didn't inhale any of the blood they sprayed in the safe room when they got in it while I was moving the kids," he babbled.   "They're all fine and it's not going to hurt them.   The brownies said it was deer blood."

John stared at him, getting out of the truck.   "Deep breath, try that slower?" he ordered.

"Sounds like the blood elves came back," Dean said, getting out of his car.   Xander had come right to his window to babble at him.   That was definitely a good sign for their relationship.   "The kids are fine?"   Xander nodded quickly.   "Are they all gone?"

"Mostly.   The brownies said they made the others flee.   I got the kids into the safe room but it was kinda dark down there and I didn't realize one had gotten in since I thought it had been sealed.   Apparently they can travel on beams of darkness.   So they splattered the roof with deer blood.   When I got the generator started and saw that, I covered it with a tarp and cleaned the kids off.   Told them not to lick it or swallow any.   They agreed it would be gross."

"Yeah," Dean agreed, still deciphering the babbling.   "So the kids are safe?"

Xander nodded.   "Very safe.   No one swallowed any.   The brownies got most of them.   They even used a few of the mines to do it.   Buck and them got up here to help the last of them be hunted down.   I gave him a spare UV flashlight and let him do it.   He didn't understand until one burned in front of him when he hit it with the beam.   They wanted to wipe out the local brownies but they didn't succeed.   They were going to use human baby blood for that because apparently it's toxic to them, but no one's that hurt.   A few of the kids have booboos from playing outside but nothing from them."

"Good job," John said, getting that part.

"But one's inside Izzy's bear and I can't get it out.   I injected it with liquid silver so it's dead but I can't get it out without ruining her bear."

"Seam?" Dean suggested.

"On the feet."   He ran inside to get it, turning to find them standing there.   "Here.   See, lump of former bad guy."

Dean looked then hummed.   "There are no seams.   Armpit should be easy to fix," he decided, pulling out a knife to make a tiny cut and pull the tiny corpse out.   Then he went to find the stitching kit.   "The kids?"

"I put them back down in the safe room.   After turning on the lights because I didn't want another to get in.   I didn't realize they traveled on darkness or I would've done that the first time and seen the deer blood."

"No one's going to blame you for that since the kids are fine," John said patiently.

"You would've thrown an unholy fit," Sam corrected.   "Why are the kids down there?"

"The Sheriff said one of the cult members is in town.   Just in case."

"That's fine.   Are they all gone?"

"The brownies got most of them.   Buck and Chris got a few too.   Vin nearly got bitten by one but Chris saved his ankle."   That got a grin.   "I couldn't leave the kids alone to hunt them."

"No, that's the right thing to do," John told him.   "Calm down."   Dean came back with the fixed bear.   "That's not a bad patching job."

"We can tell her one of the bad guys got it.   Where's Kyle?" Dean asked.

"He helped by showing me the spare generator.   The sheriff was not amused when he found out what set off the mines but they explained it so he's happier that they're gone before they overrun the town."

Ellen stomped in.   "What happened to the yard, Harris?"

He looked then at her.   "Kids."

"That's a good reason.   So why are you looking antsy?"

"There was an attack of blood elves.   The kids got hit with some deer blood but he got 'em cleaned up," Dean interpreted.   "He had to stay with them so he let the brownies who live around here and then Buck and part of his team come up to hunt the little annoying suckers."   He held up one.   "In Izzy's bear."

"Interesting hiding spot."

"They can travel on darkness and I didn't realize that before I opened the safe room.   The generator wasn't on and they got the ceiling with blood.   I made sure none of the kids ingested any.   I swear I did, Ellen."

"Chill, Xander.   As long as they're fine and happy.   Where are they?"

"Safe room taking a nap because the Sheriff said that one of Izzy's cult is in town."

"Let's go get them so we can check them over.   Are the blood elves gone?"

"Buck and Chris got most of them, what the brownies didn't.   I did another turn around with the UV flashlights but the brownies ran the rest off.   They were going to hurt the kids to get baby blood so they could hurt the brownies and the naiads that live in the river.   They're supposed to be harmless too so I said it's okay as long as they don't try to drown anyone."

Dean looked up.   "Kyle, were they always there?"

Kyle's ghost appeared.   "Sorry, watching the naked, frolicking things.   Huh?"

"How long have they been here?" John asked him.

"Few weeks.   They hibernate when the river freezes.   Never saw them before but they're fairly nice and offered to help Xander catch fish if he'll wear shorts."

"I have spandex," Xander offered.   Kyle grinned at that.   "I was on the swim team."

"That much exposure might make them too hot, boy," Kyle told him.   "The kids are fine.   We made sure of it. I was off fighting the evil little bastards while he watched the kids."

"Good!" Ellen decided.   "Let's get 'em out.   Their parents are behind us somewhere."   They went down to the safe room, getting the kids out.   "There we are."   She smiled at her godchild.   "Were you okay while we were hiding you?"

"Izzy let her use her thumb," Xander told her.   "I didn't bring the camera because it was cute, but I didn't think about it."

"That's not the thing you think about during an attack," she agreed.   She picked her goddaughter up.   "Did you suck the baby's thumb for her?"   She smiled and nodded.   "Did she taste good?"   The little girl smiled and nodded again.   "That's good then.   The parents are showing up soon, guys.   C'mon.   Or else you'll have to be watched by Jo."   They trooped up and right outside to play in the mud.   Izzy grabbed her bear, scowling at it.

"One of the bad guys hurt it.   Those are stitches to make the Tara Bear feel better," Sam told her, giving her a hug.   "Dean fixed the booboos for you."

She smiled at Dean, giving him a hug with her and the bear, then went outside.

"No getting the bear in the mud," Xander called.   "Put the Tarabear on the porch please."  She carefully sat her bear down then went to get messy with the others.   "Thanks, Ellen."

"Welcome, Xander.   Is this the first time you babysat?"

"Yeah."

"Did they eat?"

"A lot.   More than even Dean does."

"Ah, you spoiled them."   She patted him on the shoulder.   "Let's go watch the little brats."   He pouted.   "They can be."   He shrugged and went outside.   "You guys do a sweep for more little buggers."

"Going," John agreed.   "UV flashlights?"

"Hall closet," Dean said, going out to watch over the kids too.   Sam was going on patrol and only two of them could fit in the attic at a time.   He gave Bobby the silvered skeleton.

"What's this?"

"Blood elf.   It was hiding in Izzy's bear so I hit it with a tube of liquid silver," Xander called.   "They had to figure out how to get it out without giving the bear another booboo."

"You have liquid silver?" Ellen asked.

"Willow put some in some pressurized tubes for when we had to have some on patrol."   He got up to get one, coming out to hand it over.   "See, snap the tube, then you've got about two minutes to inject it in them.   Or if you let it solidify again, you just break the needle and use it that way because it does have a small point."

"Huh.   Never seen that."   She put it into her shirt pocket.   She looked at him.   "You okay?"

"No.   Buffy died to close the hellmouth.   She was still my friend."

"I meant about Willow."   He stared at her.   "She closed the hellmouth but a fury got her, Xander," she said gently.

"So she's paying?"

"Yup.   She's with the coven in England.   They said she'll come out of it once all the bad stuff has been punished.   Might be a few years but she'll come out of it."   Xander nodded, biting his lip.

Dean reached over to pat him on the head.   "Tara and that Andrew guy are working together as a coven.   His buddy Jonathan is threatening to make all sorts of geek toys to protect them but they work well together.   He's the dark to her lighter nature."   Xander grinned at that.   "They reclosed it when it tried to reopen.   Twice."

"Wow."

"She's very safe and both boys know our whole family is going to come jump down their throats if she's ever hurt by them.   Since Sammy's scowl was enough to send Jonathan off in a screaming panic, I doubt they're going to do that."

"That's good for her then.   Faith?"

"Bit more banged up.   She was really tired after the last one.   Spent most of the lead up in the tub soaking it away really."   Xander nodded.   "She's fine though.   Jonathan is setting up a place for them near the hellmouth.   Well, what's left of that area.   It did knock down a few things and some of the demons did get some of the surrounding buildings but it's all right.   No people got hurt outside a few of the hunters.   Two got turned and Willow did the soul spell before any of us knew they had been turned.   Another one got pretty banged up when a demon snuck up on him and used him to knock down a tree.   He'll be here with his boy to pick up their kids later tonight.   He had a long night in the ER."

"You guys?"

"Some stitches, some bruises," Sam said as he joined them.   "We couldn't find any, Xander.   Neither could Kyle."   He sat down outside of the muddy area.   "Are you guys getting messy for your parents?"   They all beamed and nodded.   "Why?"

"It's fun," one said like it should be obvious.

"We took the opportunity to get in every mudhole at their ages too," Dean reminded him.   Bobby nodded at that.   "Their clothes all done?"

"Some are in the dryer."

"Sammy?"   He went to do that.   "That way the parents only have to pause to give baths."  Xander laughed.   "They'll need 'em.   Izzy especially.   How did the sleepover go?"

"Pretty well.   They were nice.   Izzy got to ask the older kids to read to her a lot.   I got to stop her from bugging them sometimes.   I put kiddy filters on the laptop and let the older two surf good kid sites while I watched.   Oh, we do know one is trying to get onto magic and spells sites?"   Ellen shook her head slowly.   He pointed at one reading.   "And that's a classification of magic manual."   Bobby went to take it from the girl and talk to her.

"I'll talk to her parents for you, Xander.   That way you don't get to hear them yelling at her."

"It could be that she wants to hunt," Dean offered.   "I snuck plenty of info at that age."

"No, she's not," Xander said.   "Nothing on hunting.   Now, she could feel she has magic and she's doing that."

"No, she's a little snot," Ellen said.   "She'd never be a white witch so her mom won't allow it.   Actually, her mom hates witches."   More cars and trucks pulled in, making the kids squeal and run over to pounce their parents.   One set pouted.   "Yours are going to be late.  They had a flat tire last night."   That got a nod and they went to hug the other parents.   Izzy pouted at her.   "You'll see 'em again, Izzy."

"Like daycare, they won't be there every day but you'll see them a lot," Xander told her.   "Quit pouting and get Dean messy?"

She beamed and threw mud at Dean, making him huff and do it back.   She cackled and got up to hug him since she was so messy.   "That's my girl," Dean told her.

"Really?" Ellen asked with a grin.

"Now."

"And her father...."   Sammy waved his hand a bit.   "You're okay with that?"

"I don't think I could handle it full time.   Or being with Xander."

"Good point.   Well, Dean, if he does it for you, I'm good with it," she decided.   She got up and walked over.   "There were a few blood elves that came to get them so they could take out the local brownie clan.   Xander protected them from the deer blood they threw around and from them.   They're all gone and the kids don't even have a scratch."

"I made sure that none of them tasted any of the blood," Xander promised, getting up to come over.   "I swear I did.   I didn't know they could travel on darkness so there were a few in the safe room before I opened the door.   When I realized that, I took care of them and Buck's team came up to see why the brownies used some of the fence's mines to blow up the rest of them.   They got the ones hiding in the attic and things so the kids were very safe.   They liked the granola bars I had down there and we kept a pretty fair schedule.    I even did laundry for you guys."

"Sounds like things that happen around hunters," one parent decided.   "You have brownies around here?"

"Yeah, some live in the woods.   They're very nice.   We talk a lot of the time and they think Izzy is adorable too."

Dean nodded.   "Though we'll have to start giving fresh milk again, Xander.   Powdered milk is nasty."

"Okay."   He glanced back then at them.   "They said we have naiads in the river too."

"I think you're going the same sort of insane Kyle did," one said gently, patting him on the shoulder.   "Let's get you cleaned up, guys."   They trooped to the bathroom. The parents sorted out the newly washed clothes and repacked bags while their kids bathed, handing them new outfits.   Xander let them wash them before they left too since it was nearly dinner time by the time the kids got done playing in the water.  The parents took the good behavior bribery bags to regulate the sugar their kids would have later but that was a parent thing he guessed.

Dean waved as the last of the hunters and their kids left.   "Thank god."   He looked around.   "No one took Izzy, right?" he called.

"She's down for the night," Sam called back.   "Night, guys."

"Night," John agreed, shaking his head.   Ellen giggled.   "There's a few guest rooms, Ellen.   Let me get you into Dean's ususal one since he probably won't be needing it?"

"My stuff's in the closet but not yet.   He cuddles very well," Dean said blandly, making Xander blush.   "You do.   Even if you do draw on my stomach."

"What am I drawing?"

"I'll find some way to show you."   He waved at the others.    "Let me shower too."   That got a nod and he went to do that before Ellen could get into his clothes and stuff.   He came out to find everyone else had headed to bed but Xander.   He was out in the living room.   He settled beside him.   "What's wrong?"

"I called Faith.   She said it's much too dangerous.   They had a huge demon down, one of the Highers, who was running late."

"Figures."   Xander looked at him.   "She's got the broomstick up their asses patrol, Xander.   Plus Jonathan and Andrew making her geek toys.   They did want to know how you made that light thing."   Xander nodded.   "Tara's there for her witchly needs, with Andrew that's stronger than Rosenburg ever was."   Xander relaxed against him.   "Besides, you'll do great being a semi-roving hunter with this as home base.   We can repay Buck and Chris being nosy by going to take out their stuff."

"You don't mind?" he asked quietly.

"Nope.   If I miss traveling that much I'll go hunt with the family for a bit.   Sammy's going to drive Dad nuts for years."

Sam came out to sit across from them.   "I'm going to help Faith actually."   They stared at him.   "She needs someone who can research since the watchers aren't showing up."   Xander frowned at that.   "Giles is still drunk in LA.   Wes has his hands full there.   He said that the watchers don't like Faith and think she's too dark.   So we'll go work together.  She needs another hunter and I can train Jonathan and Andrew both if I have to."

"Johno has some of the skills already.   Andrew has some from ducking his black magic using older brother that used to be mean to everyone."   That got a gape.   Xander nodded.   "Warren was a bit psycho so watch out for him."

"We will," Sam promised with a grin.   "This way Faith is taken care of and has someone she can trust at her back, plus I can research for her.   Giles said he'll send most of his books to her and the rest here to you so no one gets into the magic books."   That got a nod.  "So all you have to worry about is Izzy and the local demons."

"I can do that," he agreed.   "Plus we can go take care of the one that's bugging Ezra?   He's got one that's trying to stalk him."

"We can definitely do that," Dean agreed.   "Do we know what it is?"   Xander whispered in his ear, getting a laugh.   "Figures.   That guy finds more trouble than anyone but Sammy and you."   He looked at Sam.   "Dad knows?"

"He suggested it because it'd give me more normal guy time than full time hunting.   I can even go back to school around the issues."

"That's hard to do," Xander warned.

"Not that hard," Sam said with a grin.   "I can handle it."   He stood up.   "So don't worry and tell us before you come in to visit.   That way we can make sure you guys have a good, safe place to squat with the baby."   He went back to his room.

"Wow," Dean said.   Xander smiled at him.   "That works out pretty well.   Dad'll travel between the two of us probably."   Xander nodded, resting against his shoulder.   "Let's hit the bed."   Xander nodded, getting up and hauling him up too.   Dean smirked because Xander was dragging him to bed.   "Anxious?" he teased.

"Worried sick.   You didn't call after it was done with."

"Sorry.   Phone's dead."   He closed their bedroom door and they stripped down to their boxers to climb into bed.   Xander rested against him, which was a big step.   Usually he saw Xander's back for the first hour of him being asleep.   This time, Xander was nicely pressed against his side.   Dean kissed him.   Xander blinked up at him and took another one.   "Think?"

"Don't know."   He took another kiss.   "If it happens it does."   Dean nodded at that during the kiss, taking over a little bit since he had more experience than Xander did.   They were down to groping when Izzy snuck in.

She climbed up onto the foot of the bed, scowling at them.   "Mine," she complained.   They broke off to look at her.   "Mine!"

"Well, technically you're ours," Dean said, pulling her up to cuddle.   She beamed at her daddy.   So he kissed her on the head then her father.   She giggled, giving him a hug until she wiggled down.   "So we can make out now?" he asked as she toddled off.   She left the door open so he got up to walk her back to bed.   She ran cackling into her grandfather's room, letting Dean go back to his warmer bed.   "I think she approves.   She went to tell Grandpa that we're both hers."

"She's so spoiled," Xander moaned.

"Now and then, yeah."   He locked the door then came back to bed, kissing his lover again.   "Have we heard the hyena or anything protesting?"

"No.   She likes you."   Dean grinned.   "Maybe that's what I'm drawing on you."   He took another kiss, letting Dean lead him down the garden path to nakedness and then naked groping, and finally rubbing against each other.   Which felt very good.   Now he understood why gay guys had sex.   He went limp across Dean's chest, yawning.   "Thank you."

"Welcome."   He let the boy cuddle, getting himself comfortable at the same time.   That was good for him and it was happy making time in the morning again if he had his way.

John waited until the noise stopped to put Izzy back into bed since her room was closer to theirs.   "They need more insulation."   He went back to his own bed shaking his head about his sons and their strangeness.   Ellen was giggling, he could hear her.   Bobby was snoring so that was better.   At least no one would pick on the boys in the morning.

***

Izzy looked up the next morning when her daddies came in.   "Mine!" she begged, holding up her arms.   Dean kissed her on the head and gave her a hug.   Xander did the same.   She beamed at Ellen.   "Mine."

"Yes they're your daddies, sweetie."

"She decided we couldn't kiss until we gave her one last night," Dean said.

"We are so locking the bedroom door," Xander agreed, making her cackle.   "Breakfast?"   Bobby handed them both plates.   "Thanks, Bobby.   You cook as good as Dean does."    He gave him a one-armed hug.

"I should since I taught him."

"Did you teach him that casserole stuff too?"

"Probably."   He smirked.   "No suggesting I teach more young hunters how to cook either, boy."

"I'm not.   If I did, you'd be driven nuts by the kids I just watched."   He nodded, laughing a bit.   "So, who's going to Denver?   Are Dean and I going?   I might know the one after Ezra."

"EzEz?" Izzy asked.

"Yes, your favorite reading buddy," he agreed dryly.

"Me?"

"We'll see if you can go," Dean agreed.   She beamed at her grandfather.

"You won't be able to leave her alone."

Dean shrugged.   "I can probably talk someone into babysitting for an hour or so while we get the demon off him.   Or she can sit out of the way since it's not a harmful thing."

"Not physically anyway," Xander agreed.   He dug in, eating all he could.

"Busy night?" John teased with an evil smirk.   Izzy scowled at him.   "What?"

"Mean."

"I am not."

"Yeah you are," Dean told him.   He ate another bite, watching Xander.   "Did you not eat while the kids were here?"

"I kept trying but they needed stuff so it got interrupted and stolen by one of them."

Dean rolled his eyes.   "The boys did that to me many times," John assured him.   "She will too some day."

"She won't be eating like a teenage boy," Dean reminded him.   That got an evil smirk.   "She won't be."

"No, she'll be eating like a growing girl."

"Most of them get picky," Xander told him.   "And fussy and want salads."   She oohed at that.   "Not yet you're not."   He finished up and got up for seconds, coming back to finish it.   She stole some of his toast but that was normal.   "Eat yours first."   She dove into her breakfast, making a mess but it mostly went into her mouth.   Sam got her cleaned up and it was better.   She got down, found her bear, and went to watch the wind blowing outside. Xander watched, shaking his head.   "Sometimes she's a strange little girl."

"It the Sammy genes," Dean teased.   Xander scowled at him.   "He did all sorts of strange shit."

"I did," Sam agreed dryly.   "Not that my big brother needs to give my daughter ideas."

"I won't be letting her try to lick the frogs like you did because you saw it on tv."

"Didn't find a pretty colors frog?" Xander asked.

"No.   Unfortunately mine was a tree frog and I got hellishly sick."   John gave him an odd look.   "I had seen something on frogs that got licked for their hallucinogenic properties, Dad."

"Where was I?"

"We were in Arizona," Dean said.

"Oh, that month."   He shuddered.   "I remember coming in at the end of him being sick."

"Feel lucky, I had to call poison control to make sure it wasn't poisonous."

"That would've gotten us in trouble," John agreed.   "Though I would've thought Sammy had more sense than that, even at that age."

"He did a lot of stuff you'd shake your head at," Dean quipped with an evil smirk.

"Don't teach them to Izzy?" Xander nearly begged.

"I'm not.   I don't want to watch her throw up frog juice for a week."   Sam shuddered.   "I did whip his ass for you, Dad."

"Thanks, Dean."   He glared at his younger son.   "At least you learned."

"And when someone offered me one in high school I didn't go there," he shot back.

"You still came home high," Dean reminded him.

"Acid."

"Wasn't that bad to do," Xander admitted, looking up.   "I had fun that night."   They gaped at him.   He stared back.   "Not like I had a big brother to tell me no.    All I had was Willow after Jesse died.   He didn't say no to a whole lot of things."

Dean shook his head.   "You still running that wild?"

"I haven't had the energy to run that wild since our first apocalypse."

"Good point."   He patted him on the back.   "If you want to share, I'll listen.   I chewed Sammy a new one but since it's so far back I can just listen."

"We can make sure our daughter does not have any days like that."

"Definitely," Sam agreed.

"She's got parents who're hyper protective," John pointed out.   "She won't be turning that way."

That got a nod and they relaxed.   She would not be one of the kids who did a little bit of everything to try it out.   They'd make her a good girl who was content to let boys worship her.

***

Xander found the right spot and got out, knocking on the front door.   JD opened it so he handed over Izzy.   "Hold her.   It's going to get messy and nasty."   He walked in and dropped his bag on the couch, opening it to take out something.   "So, Ezra, liking my exes?   That's two now."   Ezra let out a soft moan.   He grinned.   "She's cute and fun while it lasts."

"He's been really tired," Buck told him.

"I know.   There's two reasons.   She's feeding off him or she's turning him.   I'm guessing the turning since he's trying very hard to be cute today."   He walked over so he could lay down wards around the chair he was handcuffed to.   "She back?"

"She tried but Chris drove her off," Buck admitted.   He looked at JD.   "Take her outside, JD.   She don't need to see this."

"Dean's coming; he had to finish chatting with his overprotective father who thinks I'm going to be evil around the baby again."   He looked up.   "John does like to underestimate me a lot."   He looked back at JD.   "She's not going to be happy.   She won't hurt the baby.   She didn't when I was pregnant and dating her but it's going to get nasty."

"I don't need to know about this stuff.   I'll guard the door and the baby," he agreed.

Xander looked at Buck.   "He's very sweet and nice."

"I catch one of them coming after him I'll beat her and then him," he assured him.

"Good."   He grinned.   "Wish I'd had you as a big brother.   You might've kept me from dating Anya."   He started the summoning.   "Back up, guys.   I'm calling her here."   He looked down at Ezra.   "Call her."

"Darlene?" he called quietly.   She faded in.

Xander smiled and waved.   "Hi."

"Xander!" she squealed, hugging him.   "What are you doing here?"

"Freeing another buddy from you."   She pouted at him.   He stared back.   "Izzy's outside."

"The baby?   You named her Izzy?"

"Isabelle.   Her uncle's outside too."   He stared at her.   "Let him go."

"I can't."

"You can.   Let Ezra go, Darlene."

"I really can't.   I'm stuck."

He sighed.   "Try?"

"I'm trying," she begged.   "Really I am.   But he's so nice and sweet.   Plus he does the nice things that I like."

"Go date Anya."

"She likes boys too."

"She likes tongues and toys, Darlene.   The same as you do.   Go date Anya and put an incubus between you now and then.   Now, let Ezra go!"

"I'm trying!   He's stuck."   He sighed, pulling something out of his bag.   He inserted the four needles in their spots and then dropped something into the main barrel, dropping in something else, which he had to take out and flip around.   "Xander, please don't?" she begged.

"Then let him go."

"He's stuck."

"Buck, you'll wanna move about four feet to the right."   Everyone got out of the way.   "I can unstick him."

"That'll hurt a lot."

"Yay."   He fired it and she flinched as the needles hit her, making her release her hold with a scream of pain.  Ezra moaned in pain as the link let him go.

She disappeared in a pop.   "I won't bother your friends again and I'll tell Anya you said hi," she called.

Xander looked down at Ezra, then at Buck.   "Standard anti-succuba precautions."

"I can do that.   Why did John think you'd be evil?"

"I was cackling at an idea earlier.   Then again, he thinks I'm tragic, tainted, and strange all the time," he said dryly.   "But he's not giving me 'you dirty whore' looks anymore like he did when I was pregnant."

Darlene reappeared, staring at his stomach.   "Did she restart it?"

"Primed it but I'm told the brownies I live around have blocked it.   Shoo!"

"I won't hurt him."

He stared at her, reaching to reload the gun.   She squealed and disappeared.   He put the gun back but Chris took it to look at.   He handed Ezra a copied sheet.   "Standard protections to be painted around your house.   Around the doors, windows, bedroom especially since it's succuba that's bothering you.   They can be in faintly off-colored paint if you want.   You can turn them into a decorative border if you want.   On the backside is the one I used for that around Izzy's bedroom.   That's got more protections woven in and you can turn it into a template to paint over with an exacto blade and some clear plastic."   That got a simple nod.   "As long as they're not in the exact same shade, you'll be fine.   Do the holy water thing and next time don't date the desperate ones."

"It was for an assignment," he said quietly.

Xander grinned.   "I didn't know the succuba were running guns.   Faith will probably be *very* amused at that."   Chris shuddered.   "Faith has Cleveland.   Sammy's going to be her backup.   Tara and Andrew, one of the guys from Sunnydale, are going to be her witchly support.   They balance each other out and Andrew comes with a best friend Jonathan who is also a major geek.   Between the two they built a Buffy robot that was so lifelike you couldn't always tell the difference.   They tried to take over the world a few times but they're generally nice geeks.   If I want to pray to a geek god, I prayed to their trio."   That got a groan from Chris.   "Sorry."

"How realistic?"

"She's in Cleveland with them.   Technically she's Warren's but he's not wound too tightly.  They've got him under watch because he's not real clear on the boundary between his world and our world."

"Good to know," Vin agreed.   "Is he getting help?"

"His boys are there to do that and Tara will stop him if he does something too bad.   Sam will if she can't and Sam has told them that if they hurt Tara, they're his.   They should be fine and Sam's watching over their shoulders."   That got a nod from everyone.   "Though they are good enough to build proton packs and energy weapons if you wanted or needed them to," he finished with a grin.   "Dean and I agreed that since Cleveland was still so bad and Faith makes a good team with Sammy that I'd cover the local area with him."

"That's fine," Chris agreed.

"I was wondering.   Wasn't there an office closer to Montana?"

"Anything like hunters, they call the ones of us who know," Buck admitted.   "Since John called us directly, we took the case."

"Ah.   Good idea I guess.   You guys aren't too bad."   He grinned.   Darlene faded back in and he threw something, making her foam up and splash everyone and everything with goo.   "I told you no."

"Is that like ex-girlfriend abuse?" Vin asked, wiping at the nasty residue.

"Only if it's a human," Xander said dryly.   "Or something harmless.   Since she's not... no.  And it only banished her form.   Give her six months and she'll reform and go hit on Anya to let her have some fun."   He took his gun back.

"Who makes that?" Chris asked, taking it back.

"I did."   He pointed.   "Those shoot holy water ampules in the needles.   They're fairly easy to get.   The main thrust power is the little ball and cap I put down there."   He let him see the parts.   "It's very handy and gets it across the room at succuba and other semi- corporeal and flimsy entities."   He grinned.   "Then again I can hit a few vamps at once with holy water with it to make them shriek in pain too.   It has a good hundred yard range with the blasting caps I use."

"Huh," he said.   "Interesting.   Can I borrow this to test?"

Xander sighed.   "Must you?"

"Just to test it, not to have it destroyed," Buck promised.   Xander nodded, handing over the blasting caps, covers, and empty needle set.   "Thanks.   Which way?"

"Cap covers the blaster to keep most of the force in there but it's thin enough that it won't cause a misfire.   Should fit over it like a cover so it gets blown out.   Otherwise it bites you."

"I can do that," Chris agreed.   "Any other neat toys with you?   The boss wanted to see those light grenade things."

"Maybe in the car.   I don't know if Dean used the one he took or not."    He walked over and opened the door, smiling at JD.   "She's gooey and gone.   Dean, Chris wanted one of the light thingies," he called down.   "Tell your dad to get off your ass, you're a big boy now."   He took his daughter back.   "Were you good?"

"EzEz?"   She looked over his shoulder.   "Eww!"

"That's a new word," he said, looking at her.   "I know, it's gross.   It comes off with soap and water."   He carried her in, letting her dive down to pounce Ezra.   "She loves those stories you read on tape for her.   She even gave up snow and mud for them."   Ezra smiled.  "Dish detergent so you get anti-bacterial stuff, Ezra.   It'll come off in the wash."   That got a nod.   "Don't let it set too long or it'll be cement."

"I can do that.   Thank you, Xander."

"You're welcome.   We're going to handle the thing downtown that's trying to eat a building again.    Get one last kiss, Izzy."

"We can do that," Buck offered.   "Give us time to shower?"

"That way we don't have to bust you for using artillery on it," Chris agreed.   "We won't get in nearly as much trouble."

Xander looked at them.   "I think I'm going to scare them more than use artillery, guys.   Really."   He looked at his daughter.   "One last kiss."   She smooched him loudly on the cheek and giggled, letting her daddy take her off.   "Later, guys.   Call if you have more issues."   He waved, shutting the door behind him.

"If the hunting stuff turns you into him, I will gut you," Chris told Buck.

"Not a problem.   Really, pard.   Let me change and we'll follow him."

"I'll help Ezra clean," JD offered.

"That would be appreciated," Ezra agreed.   He got up and went to change, letting them grab their spare bags to use his bathrooms.   Thankfully he did have a guest bathroom at his condo.   And a washer.   He and JD got to work scrubbing up the other stuff.   "I'm tempted to hire in someone to clean this mess up," he admitted after a few minutes of scrubbing.

"That's mean to the maid companies, Ez."

"Not that mean."

"Yes it is."   They finished up and watched the news to see how the big demon had went down this time.   JD giggled.   "He made it swear and stomp off with how cute the baby is?"

"Apparently.   She is adorable."

"Some day they'll be beating boys off her," JD agreed.   "Probably boys like Buck."   Ezra nodded at that.   "Do we have to do another cleaning round?"

Ezra called his weekly cleaner.   "I accidentally brought home a foam sample earlier and I've cleaned most of the goo off the walls.   Might I have you over tomorrow to do another round of cleaning with dishwashing detergent?   Thank you, my dear.   No, I'll be at a motel tonight."   He hung up and went to get things, letting JD follow him.   On the way he called Buck.   "I'm going to lounge in luxury where I don't need to scrub things.   JD switched them to the dryer for you boys.   Thank you."   He hung up and changed directions.   "Chris said to come camp at the ranch tonight."

"That's fine.   It'll mean you won't be alone."   They met up with the others there and settled in to get a bit more drunk.   It was their usual reaction to demons in Denver.

***

Xander appeared next to Faith six weeks later, smiling at her shocked look.   "What?"

"Magical transport?"

"Sneaking up on you," he teased.   He held up the baby.

"Awww, there's my niece. And with vamps around."

"Spike's here."   She rolled her eyes.   "He is."   He smirked when he came out of the shadows.   "Any of the vamps left?"

"Nope."   He looked at the baby.   "Hi, bit."

She beamed and waved.   "Hi!"

Faith giggled.   "She leaned that off the ladies that hit on the daddy, huh?"

"Sometimes.   Though none recently."   He put her in Spike's arms, then turned and threw a knife at something.   "I told you to quit following the baby!"   The demon faded back out.  "Sorry, she thinks she's adorable too.   Wants to claim her."

Faith rolled her eyes.   "Need help with that?"

"No.   It lets me practice my knife throwing skills," he said dryly.   She cackled.   "Beyond that, the house is being sprayed.   Dean wanted to come smack his little brother around.   I needed out of Montana.   She needed to see a reasonable woman because the ones at daycare told her she was to get married early and have many kids to make me a grandfather.   I nearly busted her ass for it but the sheriff got there in time to pull me away from the closet she was hiding in with another lady who agreed.   The pastor agreed that was the wrong thing to tell my daughter, even if she is a princess."   Spike cackled.   "The sheriff suggested they join this century instead of two ago.   It's been a long week."

"I guess it has been.   Dean off pouncing Sammy for me?   He's been a stick in the mud recently."

"I heard that."   He grinned.   "We can go if you can get Sammy to babysit."

"I think I can do that.   She's his.   He can be a daddy for a night."

"She even has the runs for him," he said proudly.   "Payback for leaving me with her when they gave her the flu."   She laughed, calling him to tell him to come watch the baby with Spike.   She took Xander on a club hunt with her.   Sammy couldn't or wouldn't help her bait.   Xander knew how to bait and he was clearly going nuts.   "No clubs in Montana?"

"Four hours away," he moaned.   She laughed.   "And it's a teen place.   I've lost my tolerance for teenagers.   I looked at one and told her to quit squealing.   She pouted at the bouncer.   He threw her out for her fake ID."   She nodded, laughing some more.   "Then he told me I was too old to be there.   I told him it was my daughter's fault.   We went vamp hunting at the gay club instead and got four who wanted to be her stepdaddies."

"You're so bad."

"Yeah, but I need to break into minor evil before I prank Dean," he said dryly.   She shook her head.   "I do."   He took her out onto the floor once they got inside, taking her to bait all the vamps.   Even he could tell the vamps were here in force.   "Buffet?" he mouthed.   She shook her head.   "You sure?"   She nodded.   "Minor apocalypse?"

"Maybe," she agreed.   They moved apart and he went to dance with one.   That one snorted.   He shrugged and pulled another girl closer to dance with him.   She was alive.   He could feel warm skin.   He winked and she walked off with him.   He told her about the gang members that the one he had taken her from was.   That they were threatening the club and to go so they could arrest them, making believe he was an undercover cop.   She fled with her buddies to a new place.   The bouncer gave him an evil look.   He grinned and went to dance with a vamp.   She tried to bite him so she went woosh.   The others went to game face.   The remaining humans fled with screams of displeasure and a few 'that's disgusting's.   The bouncer turned out to be human but he tried to call it in.   Faith took the phone from him, shoving him out the door and closing it in his face.   "Party time," she said.

"Haven't had fun like this in years," Xander agreed.   The vamps hissed and a few rushed.   They were dusted and the rest tried to get them.   Xander stayed near Faith, it was safer that way for both of them.   She gave him a shove farther away so he went but that was fine too.   He felt one bite the back of his neck and reached back to swat it then turned to stake it then the ones in front of him.   She moved back with a small shrug.   "Not a problem," he called over the growling, panting some.   "Man, I'm out of shape."

"Me too," she panted.   Xander tossed her something.   She caught it, glanced at it, then turned on the UV flashlights.   They shrieked.   They relaxed while the light held off the vamps.   "Now what, sparky?"

Xander pulled something from his pants pocket, handing it to her.   "Blink," he ordered, setting his off.   Hers went off right after his.   The vampires screamed as they burned up.   He blinked to clear his vision.   "Made them a bit too strong this time," he complained, rubbing at his eyes.

"Quit, you'll get ash in them," she complained.   "But yeah, way too strong, boytoy."   Someone pounded on the door.   "It's clear," she said, looking around.   Cops rushed in.   She turned off the flashlight.   "Hey."

"Hey," Xander agreed.   He used his flashlight on one that had apparently ducked behind a chair.   She went up with a scream of pain.   He handed it to the cop.   "UV flashlight."

He stared at him.   "We don't usually see you handing these things, sir.   We've seen her before."

"I helped handle it back in Sunnydale but I have an eighteen-month-old daughter."

"It's too dangerous for him and her to be here right now," Faith told them.   "They're in for a visit."

"Sammy's a bit too uptight to club hunt with her and we heard there's been a buildup.   Better to stake now than have to stake more later," he agreed.

"Are you guys insane?" one asked calmly.

"Matter of opinion," Xander quipped with a grin.   The cops all moaned.   "The club only had about twenty alive humans when we went into hunting mode," he offered.   "They all fled."

One nodded.   "We got a call from someone saying that the undercover officer was going to have problems."

"I just told her I was here to handle things in an undercover way.   I never said I was a cop, just hinted I was an authority figure," Xander told him.   He looked at Faith.   "Want a soda?"

"Please.   Or a float.   It's hot tonight."

"We can do that on the way back there.   If we can go?" Xander asked.   "I've got another flashlight, you guys can have that one.   Nighttime patrols have got to suck and it's better light when you're searching for someone.   Expensive bulbs but worth it."   He walked her out, taking her back to the car.   "Home, float from a drivethru?"

"There's a good place up the street," she offered.

"Sure."   He took her up there, letting her run inside to get them some floats and then the shared home.   He walked in sipping his.   "Andrew, you guys need to make more thermo-phosphorus grenades."   He took another sip.   "And I just gave an officer one of my UV flashlights."

"That's cool.   How are you making those?"

"I sent Sammy all my stuff's plans."   They squealed and went to beg Sammy to find it in his email.    He grinned when Dean joined them.   "Mass of vamps."

"We heard.   They have a scanner set up in the kitchen."   He held up the baby, who cooed at Daddy.   "I told you he was okay."

"Why isn't Sammy watching her tonight?" Faith asked.

"He's being an ass."

"I need to get him laid."  Dean snickered, nodding.   "Think a succuba would have him?"

"Probably.   Is Darlene back and dating Anya?   I gave her a pointed hint to do that instead since she was trying to turn a federal agent into an incubus.   Then again, he saw Anya for a few weeks too."

"Which is why Chris enrolled him in a speed dating club full of rich women," Dean assured him.   Xander giggled.   "Hey, bitch, your daughter wants a kiss," he called.

"Coming."   He came down the stairs to hug and kiss her.   "Such a good girl."   She cackled and shook her head.   "No?   Why not?"

"That's her I need changed and you're gonna hate it look," Dean told him.   "Have fun with it, Sammy.   I did the last six."

"I told you to wake me up and I'd do them," Xander reminded him.

He looked at Faith.   "Did you know he snored?"

"Never slept with him that way, Dean.   How would I?"   She smirked.   "You let the daddy change that for you, pumpkin, and I'll let the geeks read to you."   She beamed at Sammy, making him walk off to change her.   "Not in the kitchen!" she complained.

"The diaper bag's in there," he retorted.

Faith looked at Dean.   "Did he learn how to be an ass from your dad?"

"Had to since I'm not," he said dryly.    He took Xander's drink to get a sip then smiled and handed it back.   "Haven't had those in a while."   He looked at her.   "We did a small turn through the usual trouble route earlier while you guys were off getting dusty."

"I love you two."   She gave them hugs.   "Let me shower and change.   You guys can use the bathroom down there."   She looked at Xander.   "He rubbed ash into his eyes."

"I can check, Faith.   Thanks."   She nodded, heading up there.   He looked in Xander's eyes.   "You okay?"

"Yeah, I made the flash part of the flash-bang too bright.   I've already teared up the ash."   He grinned, going to take a shower.   Izzy squealed somewhere.   "Hi, Tara!" he called.   That squeal was only Tara's.

Dean grinned when she came down the stairs with the baby.   "He's washing off the ash."

"It's dangerous here," she told him.

He shrugged.   "We're in for a visit, Tara.   We already did a turn around the problem areas while Sammy watched her."   She relaxed.   "Faith and Xander did a club hunt and everything."

"Poor Xander."

"He's fine."   Xander came out, to walk past them, kissing his daughter on the head.   "What's that on your neck?"

"Small bite.   I got it.   Going for the holy water neosporin."

"Sit down."   He went to get it for him.   Then he went to see if Faith needed it too.   She had a few bites of her own.   He sat her down to gel them, making her hiss as the holy water in the gel got into the open areas.   "Holy water laced neosporin, Faith."

"I was going to get mine."

He stared at her.   "Dad would beat Sammy if he didn't do this and me too."   He found one on her ankle and got it then let her go.   "There you go.   Let me get the one on Xander's neck."   He went to check him over, finding that one and another one on his side.   A few scratches got some too.   "You two needed to do this sooner."

"It's fine, Dean," Xander told him.   "I've had ones I didn't treat all night.   Or at all."   He took his daughter back.   "Tell him he's fussing like a mommy?"

"Fussy," she agreed, nodding at him.

He grinned.   "Another new word.   I'm proud, Izzy."   He nuzzled her head.   "If I didn't fuss, he'd be hurt and have booboos."   She 'ooh'ed at that.   He smirked at Xander.   "Then Grandpa would show up to beat us both."

"You got bitten?" Sam demanded when he saw Faith coming down the stairs.   "Are you all right?"

"They were trying to make me not stake them, Sammy.   Chill before I lock you in the chest freezer."   She stared him down.   "I don't need fussed over that way.   You wanna fuss, do it over your daughter."   She looked at Tara.   "The cops were really nice and calm."

"Good."   She looked at them.   "You should be fine."   She looked at Xander's neck.   "If that was deeper you'd be in a lot of pain."

He looked at her.   "Not really."   She pressed on it.   "I know but the stuff I put on the bruise there earlier thanks to the headrest in the Impala numbed the area."   He grinned. "They don't have fangs long enough to go into my spinal column.   I promise."   He gave her a hug.   "Fuss over the baby before we leave the day after tomorrow."   She smiled, taking the baby to read to her.   Sammy went to do the same thing.   He looked at Dean, then at Faith.   "They are fussy.   He even fussed when the sink bit my knee."

"It was gushing," Dean said dryly.   "It didn't stop for five minutes after I started to put pressure on it, Xander.   You ignored it for a good four before then."   Faith walked off laughing.   "Even Kyle's ghost was fluttering about taking him to the ER," he called after her.

"It was a little scratch," Xander told him.

"Maybe X and I should trade Winchesters for a bit," Faith teased from the kitchen.

"Sammy wouldn't cuddle him the same way," Dean called.

"Better not.   I'm not the Winchester family ride," he said dryly, giving Dean a look.

"Not that way, Xander.   If he did that, I'd beat his ass," he said quietly, getting a grin back.   "Any other injuries I should see?"

"No.   I'm fine.   Really."   He went to watch her read to his daughter.   "She loves you."

"I love her.   She's a good girl most of the time."

"She nearly got two of the daycare's people killed," Xander told her.   Tara glared at him. "They were telling her how she should marry early and have many babies.   All sorts of anti strong girl messages.   When they got to 'find a good boyfriend at fourteen so you can trap him by the time you're legal' I heard and they ran for a closet.   The pastor agreed they were dumb and so did the sheriff when he pulled me away from the closet because I was going to go through the door."

"The sheriff suggested an EPT too," Dean said, coming in there to sit and watch.   Xander nodded at that.   "Though he agreed, they were stupid to say it around her."

"I'm guessing she's going to be a butch feminist?" Sam asked.

"With good gun and self defense skills even if she doesn't want to hunt," Xander agreed.   "Cause I'll be damned if some little redneck boy is going to trap her in his pickup on one of the back roads some night in high school.   She'll kick his butt and then stomp off to find someone nicer."   Dean nodded at that.   "Though it is nice that going after them made that fundamentalist group on the other edge of the county leave."

Dean hummed.   "Really?"   Xander nodded.   He took his float to finish off for him since he wasn't drinking it and it was really good.   "Good to know."

Xander looked at him.   "I can go buy you one if you want."

"That's fine.   Yours is plenty," he agreed with a grin.   Sam moaned, shaking his head quickly.   "She's been pouting at your picture again, Sammy.   So you can even do bedtimes."

"Thanks, guys."   He took his daughter back, realizing he had been being a butt earlier.   She smiled and cuddled in to hug him. "I missed you too, Izzy."   She beamed up at him, tweaking his nose.   "Thanks."   He did it back, making her giggle.   "Did we get the one after Ezra?"

"Yeah, he picked up another of Xander's ex's and had to be saved," Dean said dryly.

Faith came out with a snack, giving him a dirty look.   "Another one?"

"Anya dated him for a few weeks too," Xander said with a wicked grin.   She whimpered.   "She said he was very nice and polite.   Too nice to help her get her powers back.   Then Darlene, the succuba I dated during my second trimester, latched onto him.   I suggested that they date each other since I had clearly warped them into wanting something spectacular that they weren't getting from normal guys.   Maybe putting an incubus between them now and then when they needed men things."

"Dean, do you feel like you're going to turn into an evil girl?" Faith asked patiently.

"Not yet.   If I do start to go flamingly femme, I'll let you guys come save me by taking me to a metal concert."   They just nodded and grinned.   "Seriously."

"'Tallica," Izzy cooed.

"That's my girl!" Dean agreed, smiling at her.   "You know good music, don't you, sweetness?"

She beamed at Sammy.   "You're such a good girl, even if he is warping you, Izzy."   He took her up to the room she'd have while they were there, tucking her in before Dean could warp her some more.

Dean looked at Xander.   "Tired?"

"A bit.   I'm out of shape for club hunts."

"Uh-huh," he agreed, standing up and pulling him up. "We'll see you guys tomorrow."   He walked Xander up to their room, kicking the door closed then pushing Xander against it.   "You should've told me you got bit," he said quietly.

"I'm fine, Dean.   It was a weak bite."

"It's not fine.   Those things can infect and you don't know where their mouths have been or what they might have now thanks to the current blood they just drank."   Xander shuddered.   "Be a bit more careful?"   He moved closer.   "Tell me when you get hurt, Xander.   I can't help or cover for an area if you're injured when I don't know."

"I'm fine."

"Sore?"

"A bit stiff.   The shower helped.   I've done club hunts before, but not since I was about four months along and she kicked the snot out of me for it."

"She's got a kind soul."   He looked in Xander's eyes, seeing the tiredness.   "C'mon, I can spoil you rotten and work on your shoulders."

"I'm fine."

"Shut up," he said with a grin.   "I did it for Sammy, I can do it for you."

"Were you and Sammy sharing that way?" he teased back.   "Ellen warned me you two were close."

"Not that close.   Hell no, I'd never sleep with Godzilla downstairs.   He probably has no skills in bed.   That's one thing I couldn't teach him and Jess seemed like the nice and fluffy sort."   He pulled Xander over to the bed and took his shirt off him.   "Down.   Let me work on the stiffness."

"Is this a, um, seduction attempt?" he asked gently.   "Because it's pretty good and I'll fall for it."

Dean smirked.   "If I tell you that, it won't work right, huh?"   He pushed him down, sitting on Xander's back to work on his shoulders and neck.   They were very stiff.   "You don't need a tetanus shot, right?"

"Haven't before."

"Good."   He went back to working out the stiff muscles.   Xander was making some happy noises under him.   They were making him happy at least.   He moved backward to do more of his back.   Xander moaned and wiggled so he shifted back to sit on his butt.    It was a well-padded seat for him.   He worked on his lower back, making him go limp and gooey muscled on the bed.   Dean got up and stripped down, pulling Xander's pants and boxers off him, looking at his naked back and the blush that was spreading.   "Huh.   Is that a bite scar on your left cheek?"

"Yeah."   He looked back.   "Anya."

"Obviously she thought you had good taste," he taunted with a smirk.

"She was asleep.   I think she thought it was a roll.   I had some more flab back then."   He shrugged and shifted, letting his thighs spread some.   "More backrubs?"

"Possibly."   He moved back to teasing him.   Xander was back to making happy noises.   He was shifting to give himself room too so he saw how happy he was making him.   He moved backward to work on the outer curve of his lower back and upper buttocks.   Xander was getting very happy now.   He stroked a hand down them, earning a shiver.   "You think maybe you wanna try?"

Xander looked at him.   "I'd rather do that at home," he said quietly.   "That way we don't have your brother trying to listen or the geeks or Faith."

"I can understand that. "

"But I'm not against going farther."   He pulled Dean around to make him lay down with him. "I'm all for second base or third base, or even on the slide home," he said, giving him a wicked smirk.

"I could definitely go for that action," he moaned, arching up when Xander's hand went down to grope him.   "Think you could learn to like blow jobs?"

"I like getting them.   Never gave one."   Dean pushed his head so he went down to try.   He licked first, tasting him.   "Not too bad."   He went down to do what he had liked when Anya had done it for him.   Which made his jaw sore.   He went back to teasing.

"Anything, Xander, please?" Dean begged.   Xander hummed and played with the knob while his hand played with the rest, making Dean a happy boy.   He thrust gently up, making Xander take a bit more of him.   "Please?"

"Trying but my jaw hurts."   He went back to it.   Dean whimpered at one point. "Sorry about the scraping."   He tried it again and it was better.   Dean groaned and came, letting Xander lick it up for him.   "Not too bad."   He kissed him.

Dean smirked.   "Not too bad for your first one."   He moved to tease Xander, making him a happy boyfriend too.   Xander groaned, letting it go for him.   He got a bit loud but a kiss muffled him and Dean went back to showing him he was better at this act.   Xander would get better, Dean could beg for a blowjob whenever the baby was down once they got home until Xander was excellent at it and he'd do it whenever he could so his boy wouldn't be disappointed in him.   He did tease his hole, because Dean decided he wanted to be on top, and gently stroked it with a thumb until it slid inside a few times.   Xander came at that with a swear, earning a laugh while Dean licked him clean.   "Good?"

"Very good," he said with a grin.   He pulled Dean up to kiss, handing him a baby wipe.   "Why am I the wife?"

"I'm stronger and I can ride you into a coma," he said in his ear.   "I nearly did it to one girlfriend."   Xander shivered in his arms.   "Even though you do have great stamina, the one on the bottom usually gets a lot more playing in with all the stretching stuff."   Xander whimpered, making Dean stroke his stomach.   "I think you'll like it.   I didn't mind when I did it that once but I think you'll like it, Xander.   It'll be good."

Xander kissed him.   "I'll let you try but you'll be taking it sometimes."

"Of course I will."   Dean grinned because Xander understood this future marriage was a partnership.   He wasn't going to be greedy.   He was going to take care of his family any way he could.   He'd make sure his mate was as happy as he could make them because that's what real men did for their spouses.   "Want to try that again in the morning?" he hissed.

Xander laughed.   "Naughty but I might try it."   Dean smirked back.   "We'll see."

"Sure, we'll see."   He took another kiss and let Xander cuddle against his shoulder again.   He switched sides tonight but that was fine too.   Dean wasn't picky about which side he wouldn't be able to feel for ten minutes in the morning.   It wasn't his gun hand though so that was extra thoughtful in case they were attacked in the middle of the night.   Xander was snoring into his neck.   Dean stroked down his arm, letting himself fall asleep.

Faith snuck back downstairs.   "They're very quiet.   Xander was a screamer and a moaner the one time I had him."   Sam blushed.   "Way back when, Sammy.   Back in high school."   She flopped back down, looking at the baby that had refused to go to bed.   "Why won't you sleep?"

"Bobo."

"I can tell you a story but I'm not sure if we have Izzy books," Sam told her.   Tara went to get one from her room, getting a grin.   "Thanks, Tara."   He settled in to read to her, making her a happy, sleepy baby who went to bed finally so the adults could talk and plan their next attack point.

***

Dean stopped the Impala beside the front door, watching the brownies on their porch argue for a minute before getting out.   "Is there a problem?   Xander's asleep in the car."

The new head of the clan looked at him.   "We were worried you had abandoned us."

"No, we went to visit Faith and them."   That got some smiles.   "I know we have *no* good milk in the house and probably not any bread but we can go get some later on.   Let me put Xander and Izzy into bed?"   They nodded and disappeared.   He walked around to get Xander, which woke him up.   "We're home.   Go to bed, Xander.   I'll get the baby then go get some groceries."   Xander yawned but nodded and went inside to nap on the couch.   He put Izzy in her bed and headed out to get some supplies for their resident little people.   It was the least they could do since they kept Xander from getting pregnant all winter.   He came back and put things down for them, smiling when one of the females appeared.   "Need anything else?"

"Fresh milk?"

"Fresh from the jug," he admitted.   "We don't have a cow or a goat, sorry."

"No, it's not a problem, lad.   It's still good enough for us."   She smiled.   "How is the baby?"

"Good.   She got spoiled some by Sammy but he was wary of being a daddy for a few days.   Faith doted on her to get rid of some mushiness that Izzy sucked out of her."   The brownie laughed.   "They went on a club hunt without me.   It went fine."

"Good.   Let me take this."   He handed over the small carton of cream, getting a wicked smirk.   "That's going to make for a happy night."

"You're welcome.   I'm hoping I can give Xander a happy night."

"Aye, but his girl in there already loves you."

"I know, Izzy's really special."

"Her too."   She winked and left with the food.

Dean considered it.   "Must be the hyena.   Yeah, I guess she would since he's not complaining."   He shrugged and went inside to do the lone mushy thing of the year.   He went to make the bed and make dinner.   Xander woke up a bit when he walked past him.   "I've got it.   Finish napping."

"Don't know why I'm so tired," he mumbled.   He fell back asleep while Dean put up food. He woke up again to a cooing in his ear and a wonderful smell.   "Mm.   That smells good, huh, Izzy?"

Dean looked out.   "That's one of the brownies, Xander, not the daughter."

Xander blinked at it.   It was one of the little brownies, one of the kids.   "Hi."

"Hi."   He hugged him.   "Thank you for the cream.   It was my birthday and it was very special."   He beamed and left them alone.   His mother yelled at him but he was being good and polite.

Xander grinned at Dean.   "They like cream?"

"From the legends they do."

"That's cool."   He got up with a stretch.   "Izzy still napping?"

"She's staring out the windows in her room, watching the squirrels in the trees out there."   Xander went to check on her then came into the kitchen to look over his shoulder.   "Ravioli and garlic bread?"

"Damn, you can cook," Xander moaned.   He took a kiss.

Dean grinned.   "I try now and then."   He put down plates.   "Eat with the baby and then bathe her and put her down for our time?"

"Sounds like usual to me," he agreed.   "Izzy, food?"   She came running out and hugged him, babbling about the furry things.   "Did you like the squirrels?"   He got her into her high chair, letting Dean help her eat the messy food.   He laughed when she snatched the spoon to feed herself, getting up to put plastic behind and around her to protect things from flying spaghetti sauce.   It'd take forever to clean otherwise and he thought Dean might have other plans for them later on.    They got her fed, then cleaned up and into bed with two stories since she was trying hard not to be tired.   Then they went to clean up the kitchen together.   Dean stopped him to give him a kiss.   Xander grinned back.   "I did something spectacular?" he teased.

"You managed to get her to stay in bed tonight."   He took another kiss.   "One of the little people brought up a point.   Are any of your past possessions going to bother with this thing between us?"

"Not that they have," he said, thinking about it.   "I haven't felt anything odd from the hyena, soldier, mermaid taint, or anything."

Dean grinned.   "Good.   I didn't want to wake up in the morning with you growling at me."

"Nah, she's not like that.   She'd sniff and if she didn't like you, you probably wouldn't wake up."

"Good to know."   He took another kiss.   "Leave the dishes?"

"I can slack on that tonight.   Shower?"

"I could like a shower.   Or you can be softer and want a bath if you want."

"I like showers.   The tub's tiny."

"I was thinking about the huge old tub downstairs, Xander."   Xander gave him a confused look so he brought him down there.   "See, this one has a huge water space."

"Oooh.   I haven't tried this one.   Is it hooked up?"

"I tried it earlier.   It's comfy.   Baths aren't my thing but I can see doing it if you wanted."

Xander looked at him.   "How about I soak out the soreness tomorrow?" he offered with a shy grin.

Dean growled, pulling him closer. "I can definitely see that."   He took him up to shower with him.   He and Xander got to scrub each other all they wanted.   It was good, soapy groping that was going to lead better places.   He brought Xander back to the bedroom once they were dried off, laying him down.   "How would you like to have it this time?   Your choice."

"How do you usually take your girls?" he teased back, pulling him down to kiss him.

"Hard, fast, and half and half from behind or on top."

"Hmm.   Whatever happens does, Dean.   I don't need to plan this like an assault on my tight ass."   Dean laughed, making Xander tickle him.   Dean shrieked.   Xander pounced, making Dean groan and play back.   It was good to roll around, tease Xander, and all that.   He finally got to the groping part again and Dean nearly moaned in pain from the teasing he was doing.   "Are we doing this stuff tonight?"

"Oh, yeah."   Xander leaned down to tease him.   "Let me, Xander.   That way I can prep you now too.   So we don't have to be anxious later."   He moved to get the lube and condom he had found, going to tease him with a pretty decent blow job while he fingered him open.   Xander was relaxed so two fingers slid in pretty easily.   "Never done this before?"

"Nope."   He shifted, spreading his thighs further.   Dean gave him a grin and went back to it, nearly making his eyes cross when he went down on him.   "Oh, goddess, that's good, Dean."

"I aim to please," he quipped.

"I'm sure your gun down there will be very well aimed."   Xander moaned and wiggled.   "More, Dean?   Please?"   Dean swallowed him again and switched up to three fingers, making Xander hiss but it was still good.   He found his prostate again and went back to teasing it with his fingertips while he opened him better.   Finally he was done and Xander was panting and wiggling.   Dean slid up to kiss him.   "Want me now or later?" he asked quietly.

"Crawl in.   Please crawl in, Dean."

"I like how you moan my name."   He slid in slowly, keeping Xander's hips still.   The boy naturally wrapped his legs around him so it was easier on him.   He settled himself in, letting Xander have a few seconds to adjust to him.   "There.   That's in."   Xander flipped him over to ride him for a bit.   Which he liked.   It was good to let him do all the work.    When he wanted more, he flipped them back over, pinning Xander to the bed to get back to what he wanted.   Xander didn't seem to mind, he was making more begging noises.   Dean was really starting to like how noisy he was.   He heard a door slam and groaned but kept going.   If it was their resident ghost, he could blush and float off.   If it was a relative, they'd go to their room or go visit the baby first.   If it was a problem, he'd kill them.   Repeatedly.   He kept going until Xander swore and came, then Dean let himself slide over the edge, groaning as he released into his new mate's body.   Xander went limp, panting up at him.   Dean kissed him.   "Hey."

"Probably can't escape you now, huh?" Xander asked with a slight grin.

"Nope.   That's as good as a ring to me."

"Good."   Xander pulled him down.   "I feel sticky and nasty."

"Let me get a cloth."   He got up and grabbed his robe, heading for the bathroom.   He ran into his father.   "Bad timing."   He went back to clean him up.   "Dad's here."

"Damn."

Dean grinned.   "It'll be fine, Xander.   He won't say a thing or I'll get him with rock salt.   Again."   He laid down.   "Did I ever tell you about the time Dad was trying to be quiet and sneak in after being off on a hunt so I shot him in the ass with rock salt?"

Xander grinned.   "No, you haven't."

"Hmm.   I should do that tomorrow."   He let his lover cuddle in.   "That's nice."

"You're comfy to sleep on."

"Go to sleep, boys," John called.   "You woke the baby up."

"Bite me, she'll go back to sleep," Xander called.   He looked up at Dean, who shrugged.   "We'll talk to him tomorrow."   He snuggled in better and fell asleep.   Yeah, he was a bit sore, but it had been pretty good.   That little spot Dean had hit all those times was amazing.   He had happy dreams all night of doing it again.

***

Dean got up in the morning, walking into the kitchen once he had his robe on.   His father was in there sipping coffee.   "Major emergency, dad?"

"Wondering how your vacation to Cleveland went."   He looked at his son.   "Did he swear at me?"

"He said to bite him, Dad.   You have bad timing."

John snorted.   "Not like you're trying for your own, son."

"Willow did try," he reminded him, getting a shudder.   "Cleveland was all right.   Sammy was pissy most of it.   Xander and I showed up, let him have the baby for some visitation."   Xander trudged out, getting some coffee to take down to the tub.   "Want help?"

"I'm good.   Sore but good."   He took a kiss.   "Thank you."

Dean grinned.   "Like I said, I aim to please."

Xander moaned.   "Later, when I'm not sore."   He finished his trudge to a warm bath in deep water.

John blushed.   "So I take it you two are now together?"

Dean nodded.   "Yeah, we finally got down to that last night.   What did Sammy tell you?"

"That Xander showed up to be pushy and show him up some with Faith."

"She said Sammy doesn't do very well on club hunts so he went on one with her while he and I did a patrol route."   That got a nod.   "I've gotta say, I don't think Sammy can flaunt it on the floor to entice the vamps into biting him, Dad.   He's too uptight.   And he took his bitchy mood out on Izzy the whole time.   He pouted and didn't want to hold her all that often."

"He's sorry about that.   He said to tell you.   He said he's feeling like Xander's replacement part."

"No, if he was, Faith would pick on him more than she does."

"Good point.   I got him straightened out with the fact that Faith needed someone who could do more research, which the boy isn't known for.   He's not the same sort of hunter.   Xander had to learn a lot more on his own and in a lot of different ways, mostly by stumbling into it.   Also, that Chris had liked his injection shooting gun and Sammy didn't have the tinkering thing that you do."

"True.   I like that gun too.   Chris took it to test but he sent it back."

"I'd like to see it in action, son."

"We can do that later, Dad."   That got a nod.   "He used it on a succuba while I listened to you complain and JD got to hide from the demon by holding Izzy.   Speaking of, where is she?"

"Still asleep I guess."   They went to look.   She wasn't in her room.   "Crap.   Izzy?" he called.

"She's outside," Xander called from downstairs.   "I saw her underneath the squirrel nest when I got up."

"You let her?" John asked.

"Not like she's going to get hurt, John.   There's no mines close to the house and she knows she can't wander.   Plus it's too cold and she doesn't have on socks.   She'll come beg for socks soon.   She likes Dean to put on her socks for her."

"Fine."   He'd complain about that later.

"We did make sure the acre around the house is safe, Dad."   He walked out onto the porch.   "Isabelle Belladonna Harris, get your ass inside now.   You know better than to be outside without waking us up."   She squealed, bounced, and pointed.   He looked.   "They're nice squirrels but you still should've told us.   We would've gotten you dressed."   She walked up, stepping on her pants legs so her feet weren't so cold.   "Inside."   She ran inside.   He walked in shaking his head.   "Bath time so we can get dressed."   She squealed and ran that way to take a bath so she could get socks on.   That way she could go back outside.

"You're spoiling her," John said.   "She needs some rules, even at this age."

"She's got plenty and she usually listens, Dad."    He went to give her a bath, then get her dressed.   He made her eat breakfast, even though she did pout.   Then he took her back out onto the porch.   "Stay up here.   You don't have shoes on."   She pouted and pointed.   "You can sit on the edge and watch the squirrels.   They won't come down if you're right there."   He sat with her, letting her have his lap so he could teach her about squirrels.   He watched.   "Dad, one's sick or something," he called.   John came out to look then groaned.   "Let's go inside to get Daddy a snack, Izzy."   He carried her inside, letting John and his shotgun outside.   "Muffle it, Dad."

"Fine."   He put something on it to keep the shots quiet, shooting the whole nest of them in case that one was rabid.   Then he got an empty box to put them into the back of his truck.    He could take them into town later.   Xander came out to look at him.   "The squirrels were acting funny."

"Rabid funny?"

"Possibly.   Better to be safe than sorry though."

"It is.   The sheriff said there was a rabid deer a few months back."   He went to call him.   "It's Xander, Deputy Rich.   John just got a squirrel he thought might be rabid.   In the back of his truck.   We're at home.   Thanks."   He hung up.   "He'll come get them, John."  He looked at his daughter.   "There is a huge nest of birds out back."   Dean grinned, taking her back there to teach her about birds too.   She liked them, they talked back to her.   Xander went out to meet the deputy.   "Anything bad happen while we were gone?" he asked at the scowl.

"New sheriff.   The old one fell and broke his hip so the council appointed Bill Dale."

"Do I know him?"

"The big guy who called you a gayboy."

"Ah, him."   He nodded.   "Let him try something."   That got an evil smirk.   "I'll be nice about it, but I'm not going to let myself or my family be bullied.   Especially not by a half- demon."

"Really?"

"I'm pretty sure.   Leave salt and silver laying around his desk area.   See which one he reacts to."   That got another evil smirk.   "Izzy was still cooing over them probably.   She snuck out this morning to look at them."

"That could cause problems.   Two of the cult members are in town."

"There is a federal restraining order."

"I know.   I'll remind him and why."   He took the box to look at.   "Nice shots, John.   Yeah, that one's sick somehow."   He put the box in his car.   "Thanks.   Let us know if you find more."

"Of course," Xander agreed.   "That's dangerous."   That got a nod and the deputy left.   He looked at John.   "Thank you."

"Welcome.   You let her sneak out?"

"Most of the time she heads for the mud."   He laughed at that.   "She likes it just as much as she does snow."   He went back inside to get dressed and start his day.    Dean was trying to teach her to whistle at the birds so they'd talk back to her.   He came out and whistled, making them shriek and fly off but land on another tree and tweet at each other.   She clapped at that.   "He said one was sick.   We have a new sheriff."   Dean looked up at him.   "The one we both nearly slugged for calling me a gayboy and her gayboy spawn.   Of course, I'm pretty sure he's a half demon."   Dean snickered.   "So we'll see."   He beamed.   "I don't let people pick on my family.   Also, the alarm starts going on.   We have *two* cult members in town now."   He went inside to make some food for himself.   "Anyone not eaten yet?"

"I could use some toast to share with her," Dean offered.   Xander tossed out a bag of stale bread, letting him spread it around for the birds.   That brought them closer for her to coo at.   Kyle's ghost appeared sitting next to them, watching them feed too.   "Any other sick ones?" he asked quietly.

"Just that new sheriff; the naiad got the little thing that was sick and bit the squirrel.   I had her drown it and put a tag on it."   That got a nod.   "He's a good boy."   He looked at Dean.   "You'll treat him right?"

"Of course.   You know how Winchesters are about family."

Kyle nodded.   "Good."   He grinned.   "Boy might as well be my kid some days."   He winked at Izzy and faded out.   He went to lurk and watch the new sheriff.   Moving something near him made him flinch and glare around.   He laughed, fading into view.   "What's wrong, Bill?"

"You," he sneered.   "You and all those other hunters...."

"Xander only takes out those that're hurting others.   He's that way from the start.   You picked on his family and let two of the cult members into town.   Remember what he did to them when they tried to take his daughter?"    That got a moan from a person walking in.   "Hey, Gladys."

"Kyle, how's the compound?"

"Good.   That boy might as well be my heir some days.    The little one's feeding the birds.   Oh, tell the deputy that I had one of the naiads drown the other rabid thing I found.   Don't want it near the baby."

"She special?" Gladys asked.

"Not a bit, just adorable."

"Very."   She smiled.   "Sheriff, those two strange people are setting up t-shirts of that adorable little one."

"They're from her cult," Kyle told her.

"Excuse me?"

The deputy walked in.   "Hey, Kyle.   Any other rabid things?"

"I had a naiad drown it.   Got a black ribbon on its neck."

"Good.   Anything else?"

"Those two cult members are setting up t-shirts to Izzy," Gladys told him.

"Aw, crap.   There's a federal restraining order from them getting near them."

"Remember what the boy did to them in Sunnydale when they tried to take her?" Kyle asked.   "It was really pretty from what Dean and Tara told me.   Pulled the whole front of their church off to walk in there and get her back."   Both officers shuddered.   "Restraining order, guys.   Really."

"I'll try to keep them apart, even if I don't know what a boy like him would do beyond cry," the sheriff said.

Kyle put something on the desk.   "The ATF liked his plans to keep the cult away from his girl.   Keeps him in deer meat during the winter too.   The brownies even used some when the last attack happened."   He smirked.   "He's *my* heir, Bill Dale.   If he was my son I'd be heaven blessed."

The sheriff moaned.   "Those ATF agents left some?"

"No, they let him put up new ones around the fence.   We have a way to shut them off, the safe passage map, and he's pretty good about keeping us out of trouble with them," the deputy said dryly.   "With the cult to her, the idiots who want him because he used to hunt in Sunnydale and now around here, and the ones who want her other side of the family for the same sort of things?   They said it'd be reasonable for a few more years."

"That's illegal!" he complained.

"The agents said it's not," the deputy pointed out.   "So did the mayor, who didn't want those sort of things to come here but he knew the boy would keep it quiet and out there.   Frankly, Kyle's old place is probably the safest place for Izzy.   Even if her uncle is her stepdaddy."

Kyle laughed.   "Sammy didn't step up so Dean did.   Family is everything to most Winchesters."

That got a nod.   "I can see how that goes."

"That redhead who created that snowstorm wanted him to have one for Dean," Kyle offered.   "Primed the spell again."   Bill moaned at that.   "Yeah, she did it to him with Izzy.   That's why they consider her a saint."

The sheriff shuddered.   "I don't like him."

"You'd like him more when he's off raiding nests?" the deputy asked.   "He does pretty good doing that in LA now and then.   Found a huge bomb under East LA from what I heard of his last trip.   Did he raid in Cleveland?"

"Cleveland's too new to have many nests yet."

"Pity.   He could use some more toys to keep him from pouting over what Larabee and his boys confiscated from your stash, Kyle."

"Boy kept most of it hidden for me.    Handed over the stuff that was broken and things."   Gladys moaned at that.   He grinned.   "He's good at it.   He handled the end of the world a few times with his former team.   Now one's being punished.   One's dead and sealed the Sunnydale hellmouth with her body and soul.   One's helping in Cleveland."   That got a whine of noise.   "Sammy's there too helping Faith."

"That's good to know.    Any other happy news?"

"She has a new tiara since her last one got broken.   Loves it just as much."   She smiled, leaving to go watch those cult members.   He looked at the sheriff.   "No one said you had to take it, Bill."

"Someone needs to protect this town.   That boy will hurt someone someday."

"Only if they come for his daughter," the deputy offered with a grin.   "He's a nice, sweet boy otherwise.   Blushing some at Dean earlier."

"They had a good night," Kyle told him.   "Consummated things."   That got a laugh and a nod.   "Boy should still be sitting funny with what I heard."   He faded out, going to talk to the mayor.   He found him watching the two cult members with his sister.   "They'll be a problem," he agreed.   The mayor flinched.   "They will be."

"There's a restraining order."

"I know that.   They still took over a town so they could make it a shrine to her.   No one says nuts are always wise and use sense."

"Good point.   The boy's fence?"

"Mostly still guarded.   A few were used for deer, the attack that the brownies stopped, those things."

"Have him replant them," the mayor said quietly.

"Your sheriff don't like that."

"He can leap," the mayor said, looking at Kyle.   "Go have him replant today or this week."

"I can do that."   He went back to the house.   "Boys, those cult members are screwed in the head.   They're making t-shirts to her."

"They're screwed if they try for her again," Xander told him.

"The mayor said to replant what went boom."

"I can do that."   He grinned.   "I have to give Chris new maps and find any that we missed anyway."   He went to use the spell he had Tara prepare for him.   It mapped the entire surface of the compound for him, including all the mines and guns hidden in the ground.    It left the house alone.   He smiled, marking all the dots that appeared so they were there permanently.   Then he let Dean see.   Dean pointed.   "I know.   That was one of the deer.   We need to fax this to Chris for his approval."

"Buck's out of town on a case this week," John said.   "Send it email to them."

"I can do that."   He went to scan it in and email it to JD's email.   He was their computer guy so he could get it almost immediately.   Plus he had marked where he had to replace things and that the mayor and told him to, plus why.   They'd see soon enough.   Then Xander went back to his bath.   He was still a bit sore.   Dean gave his dad a smug look, getting a head shake back for the smugness.   Like Dean was the first guy to make his new spouse sore.

***

JD opened his email, looking over at Chris.   "Email from Xander.   The mayor said he needs to replace some of those."   Chris leaned over to look.   "The cult members in town are making t-shirts and other trinkets to her again."

"Hell."   He took the printed off map.   "How did he do this?"

"No idea," JD said.   "That shows we missed a few."

Chris nodded.   "Apparently we did."   He went over the proposed dots.   "That'll take one of the safe paths from the west fence."

"You can still get through here," JD said with a point.   "That's a good ten foot area and then dodge a bit I guess."

Chris nodded.   "Probably could.   Not the route I'd want."   He studied it.   "We have to go remove those other mines soon and check on that cult."

The agents working with them gave them an odd look.   "Mines like landmines?"

Chris looked up.   "One of the hunters from Sunnydale took over the former compound of another hunter.   The old hunter had left some mines laying around so we went up to remove them.   Since his nineteen-month-old daughter has a cult to her, he's got things that want him, and the other side of her family has things that want them, we gave him permission to lay a few of the booby trap variety around the fence only as long as we got the safe path and had a way to turn them off if we needed to."

"Who is this person?" that agent demanded.

"Harris, from Sunnydale."   He typed that into the database, finding the order to let him have weapons.   Chris looked.   "Huh, the head of the FBI agreed to let him keep them.   Nice of him for a change."   He went back to studying it.   "Any other news?"

"Nope.   Nothing too personal since this is a work addy," JD told him.

Chris nodded.   "She's an adorable little princess in the making."   JD pulled out a picture to show them.

The agent smiled.   "She is cute."

"That's why there's a cult to her," JD said dryly.

"That and how her daddy had her," Chris agreed.   He handed it back.   "Write back, tell him that looks fine but I'm worried about the west wall's safe path.   One per wall."   That got a nod and JD did that for him.   Xander amended and he nodded.   "That works but I want an inventory list of whatever he confiscated in Cleveland from the nests."

"I added that the last email to ask him if he had went raiding.   He said he didn't find any good ones to raid but he'd be in LA early next month for Cordelia's funeral," he said quietly.

"Damn.   Poor kid.   First Buffy and then his ex.   Thankfully not one Ez dated," he decided.

"She was nice and human," JD told him.

"Really?   Doesn't seem his type."

"Well, nice is relative.   She was mean and snarky he said."

"That's his type," Chris agreed dryly.

The agent looked confused.   "Buffy?"

"Summers," Chris prompted.   That got typed in and he got a fuller profile going that way.  Chris read.   "That's wrong.   She finished dying to seal Sunnydale."   He fixed that.   "And the boy wasn't a tag-along.   He's damn good at what he can do.   He saved us a few problems."   JD nodded then shuddered.   "Angel's group in LA seems to like him to help.   Cleveland's too dangerous from what he said last time we talked."

The agents stared at him.   "That's not possible."

"Darlene?" JD called.   She faded into view.   "These nice agents don't believe in Xander and them.   Can you get Anya to give them a primer since she knew him so well?"

She smiled.   "You're so cute when you try to be evil, JD, because you're too good of a good boy to ever pull it off."   She pinched him on the cheek.   "I can do that.   Ahn's been bored."   She faded out again to let her girlfriend know that they needed the help.

She showed up to tell the agents *all* about the group and Xander.   And Ezra since they had dated him too.   By the end of the time, the agents put in a 'leave him alone' order on Xander's file.   No one wanted to go near that boy anymore.   He might turn them into begging, sex starved stalkers too.   Maybe that's why Larabee's team was in such a good mood and how he had talked them into leaving him real weapons?

***

Two days later, Xander walked into the Sheriff's office with a carried person, dropping the sobbing lump of human on the floor in front of the desk.   He walked out and dragged in the other two, putting them down too.   "I'm not happy."   He walked off again, going to get the brownies more cream and Dean more cookies to share with their daughter.

The sheriff looked at the tied up people.   "What did you three do to piss him off?" he asked patiently.

"We only wanted to protect the baby from the abnormal things that go on out there," one wailed.   "I'll even turn him in if I have to.   My boss won't mind."

"Your boss is a full blooded demon, child.   He'll mind and swear if he has to go near a hunter about their kids.   Not that he'd find anything."   He scowled because he had checked on the boy's background and records.   "What else did you do?"

"They hug and pat her.   She's a saint, she shouldn't be profaned by human's hands," another one sobbed.   "Please don't let him do it anymore!   It's wrong!"

He walked out to the sidewalk.   "Harris!" he bellowed.   A few of the towns people gave him odd looks but Xander came out of the hardware store.   "You're doing what?"

"They think touching her to give her a bath, give her a hug, change her diaper, those normal parent things, are profaning her specialness, Sheriff.    That's one of the reasons some of them tried to invade the LA FBI office to get her."

"Nothing funny?"

Xander gave him an odd look.   "I beat the shit out of the last person I saw who touched their kids.   Hell no!"

"Good to know.   Here?"

"Across the county line.   The old Sheriff mentioned he was a pedophile when I spotted him in town watching a kid.   He tried to snatch another one and I got the kid back.   He went to the prison sobbing in misery for his broken ribs and hands."   He crossed his arms over his chest.   "Any other questions?"

"One's a social worker who threatened to call her boss on you for doing normal parent things."

"Let her try," he said dryly.   "They're not going to find anything.   They'll probably say she's adorable too.   Because the last one that got called because I'm a single *father* didn't find anything either.   That was gender bias though."

"I heard about that."   He looked back inside then at him.   "Are they going to be able to press charges?"

"John found 'em, not me.   I was still asleep when they broke into the house.   Him beating the fuck out of them woke me up," he said honestly.

"Good to know."   He smirked.   "Want the ropes back?"

"If you wouldn't mind.   Or I can buy more.   This isn't the first one I've brought in to drop off.   Oh, can you tell the Mc...whatever his name is up the road from me, to not go tease the naiads?   It's not nice and the little bully's a pain in the ass."

"I can do that.   Ever think about getting a dog?"

"Yeah but we should wait until Izzy's a bit older and we'd have to worry about trips to visit relatives and things.   Speaking of, we'll be in LA next weekend."

"I'll mark it on the calendar to have someone drive that way to check your gate."   Xander grinned and went back into the hardware store.   He walked back into his office.   "He said there was another social worker there and she found nothing.   Just gender bias for being a male raising a kid alone."   He sat down.   "Deputy?" he called.   He came out of the back.   "Give Harris back his ropes after you read them their rights?"

"Sure, Sheriff."   He hauled them up to log them into the system and then give Xander back his ropes.    By then he was at the grocery store getting stuff.   "Cream?"

"The brownies who live near me like it."

"That's good."   He smiled.   "That little brat?"

"Was picking on the nature creatures again," he sighed, shaking his head.   "One of these days they're going to hurt the kid for it."

"I'm sure his parents will beat him to death for it this time."   He handed over the rope.   "Thanks.   Any others?"

"Any other cult members in town yet?"

"Not yet.   If there are, we'll warn you."

"They tried to take over Sunnydale to make her a perfect place for her shrine," he warned.   "That was why I moved here after helping take them out."

"I'll tell the sheriff that," he agreed, going to do that.    He looked it up online first then handed over the articles.

"Wonderful," he said dryly.

"And more may be coming."

"Do we have a list of them?"   The deputy found it and handed it over.   "Thank you.   Be sure to check Harris' gate for him while he's gone?"

"Of course.   If Winchester isn't guarding the house for him."

Kyle floated in with a sigh.   "That stupid little boy nearly drowned this time."   They stared at him.   "The naiads got tired of him and tried to drown him.   His mother showed up looking for him and caught them.   She got him free, yelling at them that Harris was going to take them out.   One of the brownies told her what he'd been doing so she tried to drown him instead.   I broke 'em up but he's in pretty bad shape right now."

"I'll get the boy to the ambulance," the deputy agreed.   "Right behind the back gate?"

"John's got him and heading to the front one.   The mother's probably wailing on herself or going to tell her husband."   He faded out, going to find Xander and tell him.   He gave him an odd look.   "He did it again but his mother tried to stop him from doing it for good."

"Drowned him?"

"Nearly.   John's getting him to the ambulance."   That got a nod and a grimace.   "You tried to warn him.   She found them trying to drown him and complained.   The brownies told her what he was doing and she nearly drowned him instead."

"Charming.   I'll be back in a few minutes."   That got a nod and Xander finished his shopping, heading out to the truck once he had paid.   He headed right home, getting there about when the ambulance did.   He looked at the mother.   "Even if he's a little prick, you still can't kill him.   If you do, your kid turns out just like me."   She shuddered, edging away from him.   "Got it?"   She nodded.   "Good!"   He hauled her out, handing her to the deputy since he was done helping the boy into the ambulance.   The boy was really heavy and a little brat.   "They should've named him Dudley," he complained quietly, making the deputy crack a smile.   "Remind the father I'm the poster child for why you don't try to kill your kid."

"I can do that, Harris.   Any other good news?"

"Only if the judge didn't give those three earlier bail."

"He's not up yet."   He dragged her off, taking her to the jail to check her in too.   "Sheriff, might want to call the judge and tell him he's got a busy afternoon.   Fair warning and all that."

He called.   "Phil, Bill Dale.   No, not a meeting, fair warning.   We've got four here waiting on you.   One that tried to drown her son behind the Harris place.   Three that tried to break in and got John Winchester up their noses for it.   The boy carried them in sobbing and begging.   Yeah, the McMurphy kid.   Again."

"Xander said they should've named the kid Dudley like the kid in the Harry Potter books," the deputy said from his desk.

"He is heavy set and a bully," he agreed.   He smiled.   "That's what he said, yeah.   They're here waiting on you to get in for the day.   The deputy figured you'd want a warning, sir.   Thank you."   He hung up and leaned back to look at them.   "It's the judge's day off but he'll try to get at least one of you this morning and then he'll do the rest tomorrow right before lunch," he called.   He went back to his forms for the mayor, handing them over when the man himself stomped in.   "Which one are you pissed about?"

"Three of them broke into the Harris house?"

"He said John got 'em.   He was still in bed.   The beating woke him up."

"Damn it.   We'd like this town to be safe."

"They're her cult," the deputy said, giving him a look.   The mayor snorted.   "They are.   And the McMurphy mom too, sir."

"Why?"

"Tried to drown her son when she heard he was being a bully to the creatures that live by Harris."

"Even worse.   Is Harris going to go hunting soon?"

"LA for a friend's funeral," the deputy said quietly.

"Thank you.   It might calm it down."   That got a nod and he went to talk to the greater gossips in town so they could find out if there were more cult members around here.   He didn't like them.   He liked that little girl too much to have such weird things like cults around her.

***

Xander came out of the Hyperion the day after Cordelia's funeral and memorial service to find a familiar face waiting on him.   "I know LA is outside your jurisdiction," he said dryly.

Buck nodded.   "Slightly but we're in town on a case, kid."   He stood up, walking over.   "You okay?"

"I'm fine.   She went out still being stubborn."   That got a nod.   "What's wrong?"

"Six nests."   He groaned.   "Gunn's people told Epps about them and no one's had any time to look."

Xander walked back inside.   "You couldn't just leave me a list?" he asked Gunn, getting a confused look.   "Nests your guys turned into Epps?"

"One of my boys did that," he admitted, looking at Buck.   "New to the LA office?"

"Actually, I'm one of the ATF agents who keeps taking Xander's toys."

Izzy pouted at him when she heard his voice.   "No EzEz?"

"Not this time, princess."   She gave him the most pitiful look.   "If I could've brought him, I would've, but he's busy right now.   He has to tell a judge why someone was a bad guy."

Xander looked at her.   "Disarm the pout, Isabelle.   You don't need to wrap him more around your finger.   He can't take you home with him."

"Chris said the next time you two are in Denver, he's going to show her what a horse is."

"Gee, thanks.   Then I'll get begged for one of those like I do squirrels and birds," Xander complained, but he was smiling, getting one back from Buck.   "Gunn, can we go over the list?"   He nodded when Buck pulled it out.   "Did Don call you guys?"

"Yup.   One's a major demonic weapons dealer."

"Oh, charming!" Gunn said, taking the list to look at.   "Yeah, Hobla's on here."

Xander looked at him.   "They didn't beat him enough?"

"He started to sell good, working stuff again," he admitted, handing the list over.   "Need directions?"

"And a sitter apparently."

"We can do that," Gunn said.

Xander looked at his daughter then at him.   "Don't feed her anything I can't cook at home?   I'm only passable on beams, mexican food, and all that stuff."

"I can't swear but I'll see what Nana Richards is making."   That got a grin and Xander went to raid their armory so he could go take out the demonic arms dealer for the local team.   One less they had to do.

Angel came out of the back area.   "Why was Harris in the armory?"

"My boys turned some weapons dealers into Epps.   They called a hunter in the ATF because he's nearly in the middle of nowhere on a case."   That got a slow nod. "The hunter guy came to Xander because he seems to like to raid nests.   I promised not to let anyone feed the baby stuff he can't cook at home for her."

"That's fine.   I guess.   As long as she isn't following me around like a secret service agent again with her bear."   He walked off shaking his head.

"Bobo?" she called after him.   "Pwease?"

"Bobo?   Bottle?" Gunn asked.   She pouted and pointed at a magazine.   "Oh, a book!   Yeah, I can read to you.   Angel might too if he's less cranky later."   He sat down with her to read to her.   "Does daddy let people sit you often?"

"Care," she said, smiling at him.   "Hair."

"Oh, I know this one," Wesley said.   "Now and then when they have to hunt in town or need to spray for bugs, something she can't be around, they send her to the town's daycare.  There's a set of twin blonde girls there that she knots the hair of dreadfully.   Have you been back since Xander ran off the nasty people who told you bad things?" he asked her.

"Huh?" Gunn asked.

"Some fundamentalists were trying to recruit early by telling her how much she'd enjoy her early marriage and childbirth.   They wisely hid from Xander in the closet when he overheard them.   The sheriff and the pastor said it was very wise and their group wisely moved on as well."   He smiled.   "The sheriff called them extremely dumb from what I was told by Dean."

"Yeah, that sounds like Harris.   He is one of the most overprotective parents."   He shook his head quickly, setting in to read to her.   He had no idea an article wouldn't be enough and she'd want the whole magazine.   Fortunately, Dawn came in and saved him.   "Hey, short stuff."

"There's my future scary girl," she cooed, picking her up to hug.

"Bobo," she said with a point.

"I can read you all the fashion articles you want, princess."   The girl beamed at her.   "We'll help you figure out what colors are good colors before your daddy's shirts make you look bad."   She took the magazine to read to her.   "Your boys turn in more nests to Xander?"

"To Epps, who gave it to an ATF agent, who got Xander," he admitted.   "Shouldn't be too long.   Only six single demon nests."   That got a nod.   "Mostly light reactive too.   He took a UV light."

"I do love those things," she said, going back to reading.   "By the way, the scary minion vamp that broke into mom's basement?   Squeaked in fear when it saw me and then begged for mercy until I lit it up because it was trying to bite while begging."

"Good girl, Dawn," Wesley praised.   He walked off, letting her teach the baby girlish things.   She would be quite the woman some day.

Dawn looked up at Gunn.   "Xander asked mom if teaching her enough self defense to make her scary was wrong.   That way no boys would hit on her."

Gunn walked off cackling at that while the baby poked and chanted 'bobo' until she went back to reading.   "Yeah, she's going to be a scary girl sort."   Wesley gave him an odd look.   "Xander apparently wanted to teach her enough self defense to scare off the boys later."

"I fear it may not work with how pretty she'll be.   But there is hope he won't be a grandfather in the next two decades."

"Or three.   Because he's too young to be Grandpa Xander and warp the next generation," Dawn called over.   Wesley and Gunn both cackled at that.   Dawn went back to reading at the gentle pokes she was getting.   "You're demanding today," she said.   "That's a good strong woman trait.   Just like my mommy is."   She turned the page then again.   "That's an ad for stuff you don't need yet."   She nodded and got to a picture, describing it for the girl.   That made her happy enough.

***

Chris looked up as Buck and Xander came off the elevator.   "Done with LA again?"

"Yeah.   It was okay but one of the nests was from a pack rat demon.   I swear not even those people with that hoarding disease can pack a nest as full as that one did."   He flopped down.   "Buck has stuff for you to go swear at."

"Didn't drop it at LA's office?" Chris asked him.

"They had an agent eaten by a demon last week and they've now decided they don't want to know but they want a single agent who can work with the hunting stuff if they have to.   Offered me a job until I said I was on your team."   He smirked, getting an evil one back.   "They offered Xander a job too if he'd go to college."

"I can see him doing that but he'd have to calm down."   Xander shrugged at that.   "Is Izzy with you?"

"Napping in the car," he said, holding up the walkie talkie.  The other end was jammed open so he could hear if she was having problems.   "I told the guard I'd be right back down after I gave you the inventory."   He handed it over.   "All yours, Chris."

"Want to show her horses?"

"She'll beg.   You know she'll beg.   She'll beg more than she does when she sees Ezra to get him to read to her."

Chris gave him the meanest smug look he could.   "I know."

"Bastard," he muttered, walking off shaking his head.   "Dean's making dinner if we make it home in time."

"Sure, kid.   Thanks for the help."

"Always happy to grope weapons for my own pleasure and to let you swear.   Buck, don't forget that stuff if it's not stolen?"

"Of course.   That way she's got more pretty stuff to coo over."   He waved a hand and Xander jogged off, heading back down to his car.   The guard was cooing at the cuteness so that was fine with Xander.   He thanked him and got in to go home.   It was only a few hours of driving away.   He'd make it by a really late midnight dinner.   He even called Dean to tell him he was on his way home.   Buck looked around.   "He wasn't joking.   That one packrat hoarding demon?   Its nest was cubicle sized and it was bigger than me.   I have no idea where it slept."   That got a groan.   But the others did follow him down to the truck he had taken from the office out there.   Chris opened the back and did indeed swear.

"I do believe our erstwhile companion did judge his reaction quite well," Ezra said.   He looked around.   "Though I do miss being begged to open her fragile little mind.   I should send her more books from the classics."

"Chris did say we could train her to take out spot," Buck said with a grin.

"I'm sure she'll do splendidly," Ezra agreed.   "Once we make her quit bouncing like her father."   They all laughed at that image.   "What shiny things did he find this time?"

"They're in the front in the box."   Ezra went to look and nearly moaned in pleasure.   "Same hoarder thing."   He looked at Chris.   "Should we let another team log it in?"

"And have them try to figure out Harris?" Chris shot back.   "Probably not going to happen, Buck."

"I'll get my laptop with the forms on it," JD said, jogging back inside.

"Drive it to the log-in area," Chris ordered.   "We'll meet you there with coffee."   They went to get something to keep them awake while logging in weapons and joined him down in the secure part of the garage.   Their boss came down.   "Buck got Harris to raid those nests the LA office called him about."

"That's nice of him.   Wasn't he there for a funeral?"

Chris nodded.   "I asked him the next day," Buck admitted.   "He said he'd do it."

"As long as we didn't force him to.   Anything we're not destroying?"   Ezra held up the box. "Oh, dear lord," he muttered.

"A hoarding sort," Buck told him.   "Mate to the one dealing most of the weapons.   They had to be magic to get that much crap in a space this size," he told him.   "And still sleep in there."

"I can see that.   If they're not stolen?"

"His daughter gets more crown jewels for her kingdom," Vin said with a grin.

"I offered to show her a horse but her father thinks he'd have to put up with horsenapping or begging," Chris said smugly.

"Ezra didn't even have to read to her this time," Buck agreed.   JD came off the elevator.   "Problems?"

"The team up the hall from us wanted to know what was going on since we don't have a new case from what they've heard."   He climbed into the truck.   "Vin, come help me shift this first one out."

"Let me get you some grunts to heft and tote," AD Travis said, calling upstairs to do that.   If anyone asked, he'd tell them about Harris and let them have this sort of headache too.   "Did we straighten out the LA office?"

"They don't want to know," Buck said.   "They had one eaten by a demon.   They're looking for someone who can hunt to join there so the rest don't have to hear about it.   They offered me a job until they heard I work for Chris."

"I'll get you later," Chris muttered.

Vin grinned.   "I got the same offer from one of the offices in Texas until they heard I worked here," he agreed.   "Apparently they think you're still scary.   Even if Harris and his daughter do giggle when you scowl."

"With what he's seen and done, that's almost a relief," Travis said, walking off to tell the rookie agents what to do.   "Unload the truck, help log things in."   They nodded and got to work helping JD while the others did the more fussy checking to see if they needed disarmed, if anything was critical to be destroyed right away, and if anything could possibly blow up Denver if it was accidentally dropped.   Travis looked at something that was held up.   "Are the little globes biological?"

Buck leaned down to look.   "Kinda.   They're eggs and they can possess you."   Chris put it back and shut that case, putting a biohazard sticker on it.    The rookies took it off to the special safe just in case.   Buck grinned.   "You sure? I'm sure the young'nes are perfectly nice."

"I'm going to shoot you soon, Buck."

"Aww, shucks," he said with a wicked smirk.   "Why?"

"Because you're an ass," he shot back.   "Maybe Rosenburg will make you one some day so you can be Izzy's pet?"

"He'd have me turned back.   He likes me."    He patted JD on the back.   "We'd have to watch this one though."

JD looked at him.   "Please don't have me turned into an animal, Buck?   I'll be neater around the apartment."

"Sure, you can do dishes and laundry tonight.   Thanks, kid."

"It's mean to make him wash your sweaty drawers," Vin drawled with a smirk of his own.

"Not like I like it," JD complained.   He went back to working on the weapons.   "Um, guys, I don't think this one is biological."   He held up a pretty blue stone.   "Is it?"

Ezra took it to look at since he was handling the jewelry.   "No, that's not a biological weapon by any means."   He took that case to count and notate too.   He was better with that stuff than the others.   Their adopted princessly niece was going to have quite the crown jewels when she got old enough to wear them.

***

Xander put Izzy into bed then went to flop into his.   Dean woke up with a snuffle.   "We're back."

"How was LA?"

"Not bad.   The memorial was nice.   Tasteful.   I almost thought she had preplanned but they did a good job," he said quietly.   Dean nodded at that.   "Ran into Buck since Epps had the local office call him because he was out of town on a case when Gunn's boys turned some nests in."

Dean blinked at him.   "You went hunting?"

"I went nest robbing but Buck was with me."

"Any injuries?"

"One tried really hard to scare me.   Kinda worked."   That got a nod and a physical look over.   "Izzy's going to want the pretties we found in one hoarder demon's stuff."

"Tiara?"

"Rubies."

Dean blinked, staring at him.   "Excuse me?"

Xander nodded.   "Underground currency, Dean."

"Damn it."

"Yeah, but Chris is checking to make sure they're not stolen.   Like he did the last batch."   That got a nod but a displeased look.   "It'll be fine.   We can use it for emergency funds if we have to run to Mexico to get away from things.   Like Willow or your dad."   Dean smirked a bit, pulling him closer.   "I didn't let Izzy visit when we dropped off the large U-Haul of weapons since Chris wanted to introduce her to horses and then we'd have to listen to her beg for *weeks* for one of her own."

"She's a good age for a small pet."

"A cat?"

Dean looked at him.   "Cats are more expensive and fussy than dogs, Xander."

"No they're not."

"Cats take litter and food.   Dogs only take food and theirs is cheaper."   Xander gave him an odd look.   "Sammy tried to beg a few times for a dog."   Xander hummed, snuggling in.  "Bobby did say he'd see if he could find us one to train to protect her from boys and to help us hunt."   He saw the smile.   "You think she's ready?"

"Maybe by her next birthday?"

"That's a good age for a first pet," he agreed.   "I'll talk to him tomorrow.   It's hard to find a dog that has the temperament to be a family pet and a guard dog or to help hunt demons.   Rumsfeld is a big puppy when Bobby lets him be, but he's also a huge dog."

"I saw.   He was napping next to Izzy the last time I was there with her.   Head on her foot in case she wiggled, staring at her like 'what the hell are you'."

Dean grinned.   "He used to knock Sammy down all the time to lap him to death.   We don't need something that big, right?"

"Nope.   Maybe a collie sized dog?"

"I'll talk to Bobby sometime tomorrow."   Xander grinned.   "That way they can shoo off boys."   Xander nodded faster at that. Dean grinned.   "Anything else come from the trip?"

"I was good since it was mostly higher weapons and stuff I didn't need.   Unless you want me to go back and get the ugly purple dayglo pleather outfits she had stored?"

"Um...no.    Thanks, really.   Unless they're Sammy's size?"

"Faith would make him change.   She has taste."

"Good to know.   She'll straighten out his sloppy ass."   He took a kiss.   "I left you food in the fridge."

"I'll eat it for breakfast," he said through a yawn.   "I like this coming home to nice cuddles thing.   It's very good for me."   He drifted off on Dean's shoulder, letting Dean laugh all he wanted as he got them under the covers and arranged to sleep.

"My goofball," Dean said quietly, snuggling in better.   Xander surrounded him and it was nice.   It was definitely nice to come home to him after a hunt.

***

Epilogue:

***

Dean looked at the huge presents that had been delivered with his Dad.   "Are those all for Izzy?"

"Yup."   He grinned.   "The one in the blue paper is from the boys in Denver.   The one in the truck is from Bobby and needs to be taken care of soon.   The smaller ones are stuff he found in a nest?"   Dean nodded he had heard that.   "What did he find?"

"Shiny stuff."

"Oh."   He handed that package over.   "And there's another package from Ezra too.   Probably more books on tape for her."

"Books?" she asked, popping out of nowhere it seemed at her favorite word.

"Later," Xander called.   "You can open presents later, Izzy."

"Books!" she yelled back.

"Later.   I got you books in a present."

She pouted but hugged her grandfather.   "You books?"

"I did bring you presents," he agreed with a grin.

Dean looked in the shiny stuff, nearly gripping his chest.   "Xander, where are we putting these?"

"The rest are in the crawl space in her room," Xander said, coming out of the bathroom.   "There, I'm better now."   He looked at his daughter.   "You can have presents after dinner."

She pouted.   "Now books?"

"Later books.   Play with Grandpa."   She took him outside to look at his truck, staring at the thing in the moving container then at him.   Xander looked outside.   "How big will it get?"

"Not that huge.   Only half Rumsfeld's size," he offered with a grin.

"I did say you didn't want anything bigger than she was in a few years," Dean assured him, taking a kiss.   "Are you all right?"

"I'm fine."   Dean stared at him.   "I am."

"Is this another fine that's going to get a panicked call to the local doctor?"

"Possibly."

Dean winced.   "You sure?"

"Pretty much, yeah."

"Take a test?"

"That's what I was doing.   So yes, Willow's back."

"Huh.   Let's hope this one isn't another lock?"

"I called Tara last night to have her check and she said it's not the same situation."

"Good!"   He grinned.   "So... mine?"

"Tara said you were trying too hard to have another snuggly one and it finally connected."  He walked around him.   "Let me finish her cake."

"Sure," he agreed, going outside.   He looked at his father, who was giving him an odd look.   He pointed at Izzy then looked inside.   John gave him a dirty look.   "Willow's better."

"It snapped fully?"

"She'll probably have a brother by her next birthday."

John moaned.   "Son!"

"Tara said I worked too hard and made a connection between the two spots."   John scowled.   Izzy giggled.   "What is the blue package?"

"I don't know but even JD was giving me smug looks when I picked it up."   Dean groaned but he did come down to look at the dog.   "He's a good puppy."

"He looks like it.   Go inside, Izzy?"   She pouted and pointed at the dog.   "Inside.   You can see your presents later."   She went to help her father in the kitchen.   Dean let the dog out so it could sniff around and water the bushes.   "He's cute."   It was a dark brown short hair with floppy ears and a thin tail going very fast.   "Part hound?"

"Part blood hound, part basset, part Rumsfeld's last spawn," he said.   He pointed at the crate.   "Until later."

"We can let him have the backyard," Dean said.   He took him around the house to show him the back yard and the tie out he had put up for him.   "There, stay here until dinner time?"   The dog lapped him when his face got close enough.   "The other two will love you a lot because you're a happy dog."   He walked in the back door, looking at Xander, who was staring out there.   "Two parts hound, one part Rumsfeld's last pup."

"It's cute."

"It's very cute.   Any idea on names?  That way we don't have a girly named dog?  I don't think I could stand shouting for the dog if she named it Barbie or something."

"I don't know."   He looked down then at him.   "Close the back window?" he suggested quietly.   Dean did that so he'd be a surprise then came to finish dinner with him.

John came in and Izzy pounced him to make him sit down and read to her.   "What do you think they sent her?"

"Remember those stuffed animals that were kid sized?"   Dean nodded slowly. "One of those."

"It's the right size.   How much longer?"   Xander grinned and held up a finger of frosting for him, getting a wicked smirk back.   "Any of that going to be left?"   Xander blushed but shrugged.   "Try to keep some back for later," he said in his ear, going to distract his daughter.   She was already in her terrible twos, though she wouldn't officially turn two until later that night.   When Xander finally called dinner, they came in to eat, taking pictures of her birthday party for the others who couldn't be there.   Sammy especially since he was laid up with a set of broken ribs and a collarbone.   Bobby too.   When she had squealed and blown out the candles on her cake, Dean went to get the presents for her.   He saved the dog for last.   It'd be hyper so it needed to be last.   She squealed at each new present.   The huge one was an animatronic horse that let her ride it around.   It was already named.   Dean looked at the tag.   "Chaucer.   Isn't that Ezra's horse?"

John nodded.   "I think so."   He helped her up onto it, letting it roll around with her.   "Ready for your last present?" he asked.   She cooed and petted the horse.   Dean went out back to get the dog, bringing it in. "You have to learn to be gentle, Izzy.   This is a present too."

She stared at the dog.   Then she looked at her father.   "Mine?"

"All of ours."   She squealed loud enough to be heard in Denver, getting off the horse to hug the dog.   "Aww."

"Very," Dean agreed, taking pictures.   "Figure out a name yet?" he muttered.

"Wrapper?"

Dean gave him an odd look.   "Like the paper or the semi-talented people on the radio?"

"The paper."

"No."

"Candle?"

"That's not bad.   Izzy, want to name him Candle?"

She looked at him.   "Shotgun!"

"Okay, he can be named Shotgun," Xander agreed.   "Do you like that?"   It sniffed him and lapped him too, jumping up on him.   "Good boy, Shotgun."   He pulled her up too, letting her be lapped clean.   "You still need a bath tonight."   She pouted.   "He can sleep on your bed."   She beamed and walked her horse that way with the dog's help.   He groaned, shaking his head.   "No more animals?"

"No, no more animals," Dean promised.   "No more."   John laughed.   "What?"

"I think you've got enough creatures around here and the new baby won't be any better."   He stood up, going to get Izzy ready for bed.   She was showing the dog and horse the tub as it filled.   He reached in to flip the drain switch for her.   "Get naked so you can get clean."   She did that and wiggled into the water.   Somehow she managed to tip over the bubble bath so she had bubbles.   And then the puppy decided he needed a bath so he jumped in.   "No," he moaned.

Dean walked in.   "Could use the camera," he called.   Xander came in to take a picture of the horse being close enough to drink from the bubbles, the bubble covered dog that was bouncing around and her helping him.   That got a video taken too and then he went to mail it to the others.   "Can I put the horse in the bedroom for you, Izzy?"

"Chaucy thirsty," she said in a near whine.   "My pony!"

"I know but we can put a water dish in your bedroom since bubbles aren't good for dogs or horses to drink."   She pouted.   "That way the horse can drink clean water."   He went to get one to show her.   It usually worked better that way.   He put it in and walked the horse in there since the thing weighed a ton when he tried to pick it up.   "Now, let's get Shotgun out of the tub so we can dry him off and get you clean?"   She hugged the dog around the neck.

"One," Xander called.   "Two...."   The dog got out of the tub and headed to shake off in the hallway.   "Thank you.   You guys can play under the garden hose tomorrow."   She squealed at that.   He got the dog dried off and showed him where to nap, including where the food he put down was.   Then he emailed the video of Dean talking her into moving the horse from the bathroom to JD.   He'd appreciate that and it sounded like they were having a crappy week.   Ezra was still picking up women he would've dated.   JD had some succuba after him now because he was so innocent, and Chris had a cold so he was a surly bastard.   But hey, it was family for them.   They'd put up with each other -- or club Chris over the head until he was better.

***

Epilogue 2:

***

Xander waddled into the bedroom they had set up as a surgical suite, looking at the doctor who had delivered his last one.   "Hey, Doc."

"Xander.   How are you feeling?"

"Fat and anxious.   We have to get this done before Izzy comes back from the movies."

"I can try.   You'll still be out."

"Yes I will," Xander agreed dryly.   "But this time I've got Bobby and Dean here while Grandpa takes care of her."   He laughed.   "Okay, let me get down on the bed.   Then you can do your worst."

"Boy, girl?   Do we know?"

"Boy.   Mark Jonathan.   Dean said so and his father's still scowling about it.   I wanted to honor Bobby but he said no faster."

"That's fine then."   He drew out the medicine he'd need, putting the boy under.   "There we go."   He went to scrub up and came back to do the surgery.   He looked at him.   "Well, you're a fussy kid," he said at the first scream nearly as soon as he got him out.   "That's a good thing though.   Means even your sister will leave you alone sometimes.   Come hold him so I can cut the cord."

Dean came in to do that, staring at his son.   "Hey, Mark.   Welcome to the family."   He let the doctor cut the cord and walked him off to bathe him.   Bobby was guarding outside the room.   They had worked on the wards around the house for months.   He felt something tugging on his pants leg and looked down.   "Hey," he said, smiling at the child brownie.   "What's up?"

"Is that a baby human?"

"A newborn one.   He needs a bath.   You can hop up and watch."   It hopped up to watch what he was doing.   "There we go, Mark.   No more nasty stuff from inside the daddy."

"Do all daddies have babies?   Our mommies do."

"Most of ours come from mommies too but Xander has a witch that likes him an awful lot that we'd like to spank again."

"Ooooh.   You probably spank harder than our clan elder."

"I don't know, have him go spank my brother Sammy and you two can compare."   The child grinned.

"This is certainly an unusual birthing room," the doctor said as he walked in.   "I thought last time was since it looked like it was plastered with protection marks."

"We made this time's more subtle since we had time to lay them," Dean told him.

"Not a bad idea."   He took the baby to look over.   "That's a good set of lungs," he said when he got yelled at.   He heard the door slam.   "Not yet," he called.   He finished up and handed him back.   "Clothes, Dean."

"I know.   You'll do the paternity test?"

"Of course.   Just like last time."   He patted him on the back. "Congratulations.   Your daughter will fuss him to death."   He checked on his patient then left to run the paternity tests John had demanded he do.

Izzy ran in, stopping when she saw her father back in bed, mumbling, and Dean beside him with the baby, the dog resting on daddy's legs, and his usual shotgun across his lap below the fussy bundle of blanket.   "What's that?"

"Your baby brother Mark."   She came in and Bobby picked her up.   "Be careful.   He's more gentle than the dog."   She smiled and reached down to pet her dog then looked at the baby.   "His name is Mark."

"Hi, Mark!" she said loudly, waving at him.   The baby fussed at her.   "He need food like Miss Tabitha's baby?"

"No, he can't feed him that way.   Or you when you were this little.   You can get a bottle from the fridge though."   She went running to do that once Bobby put her down.   She came running back with it.   "Izzy, look at me."   She stared at him. "Daddy has a booboo where Mark came out.   You have to be very careful of his stomach until it's all gone.   Got it?"   She nodded, giving him her best serious look but she grinned eventually.   "Shotgun, lay on Xander."   The dog switched to lay on the other father while the baby got his lap to help him feed the baby.   "Like we showed you on the doll."

"He's wrinkly."

"Babies are surrounded by water," Bobby told her.   "Like a really long bath."

"Oh, like my toes and fingers?"   He nodded.   "Cool."   She kissed him.   "Hi, Mark," she cooed.   "I teach you how to pet Shotgun and Chaucy and all that.   Then we can show you to all the uncle and aunts."   He snuffled but went back to sucking on the bottle.

John walked in.   "You babble like your mother, Izzy."   She scowled at him.   "You do."

"Daddy and aunties think it's cute," she said, then stuck her tongue out and went back to cuddling and humming to her baby brother.   "Him not play?"

"Not yet.   Give him a few months to do more than lay around and be held."   She pouted but that meant she had all the toys to herself for a while.   Xander blinked up at them.   "Say hi, Daddy, Mark."   He let him see him.

"Blond?"

"Very blond," Dean agreed.

"The doctor is running the test to make sure, Xander."

Xander blinked at John.   "If you make her pout and cry I'm going to kick your ass.   Stoned or not."   He blinked at his daughter again.   "Hi.   Liking the baby brother?"

"When he play I like better."

"I can understand that."   He patted down her hair.   "Were you wet?"

"Grandpa take me fishy."

"Ah."   He nodded, letting himself drift off petting her and the dog.   Shotgun barked at Kyle when he appeared but that didn't quite wake him up.

Kyle looked down at the baby.   "Quite a little demon spawn you've got there, Dean.   He'll make one hell of a future hunter."   Dean gave him an odd look.   "He is.   I can tell.   And that Host guy said so too.   He's kinda neat to hang around with."

"He's kinda weird," Dean told him.

He shrugged.   "Weird is relative on this side."   That got a nod of understanding.   "But he said he'd end up hunting and she'd make her own future."

"We'll do what we can to make him a sane, safe hunter," Dean promised.   "Or let him go work with his uncles in Denver so he hunts bad guys."

Kyle smirked.   "That might be handy.   Anyone take pictures?"   John did and went to email them.   "He's a fussy bastard, Dean, let him be."

"I am.   Even if he is running a paternity test."

"He wants to make sure the witch didn't make you another brother or a nephew."   Dean gave him an eyebrow quirked up look.   "Nope, the blond is all on you this time."

Izzy looked up at him. "Then why am I blonde?"

"Your grandmother was," Dean told her.   "If you ask Grandpa, he'll show you pictures."   She went to do that since the baby was doing boring stuff by sleeping.   He looked down then at Xander.   "Well," he decided.   "Too bad we can't make sure it doesn't happen again.   Two's enough."

"Remembering diapers?" he taunted with an evil smirk before leaving.

"Yup, I am," Dean agreed.   He shifted down, letting the baby lay on his stomach for now.   He didn't seem to mind.   John came back in.   "Problems?"

"He is yours."

"I knew that," he said dryly.   "Xander hasn't had another guy before or after me."   John blushed.   "Did you show her mom's picture?"

"I did.   She's cooing at it."   He smiled.   "He's a strong looking boy."

"Hopefully he won't be the bully I was now and then."   He looked down then at the dog.   "Want to go outside?"   The dog stayed there, staring at them.   "What?   We still love you."   He petted the dog, making him happier.   Xander felt it and patted him too, making the puppy much happier before he ran outside to mark some bushes.   "We're going to go insane."

"Yup," John agreed.   "I did with you two."   He smirked.   "Chris wants to know if he needs his own horse."

"Let him get to be two first.   Then he can have hers."

"By then she'll want a real one, son."

"No horses.   They take a lot of work."

Xander snuffled them.   "Ride out to steal mates," he mumbled into Dean's arm, cuddling him.

"You already stole me, Xander.   Steal Sammy and Bobby one some day soon."

"Hmm. Do that."   He patted the baby, blinking at him.   "Thought you were Izzy shrunk for a second."   He let himself drift back off.   "Nice drugs.   No more babies, Dean."

"I agree.   No more babies."   Xander smiled in his sleep, content to be cuddled and have the baby not scream for now.   Even if Izzy was whooping in the living room on her pony.

Tara appeared.   "No more babies."   He shook his head quickly.   "He does make sure the realms won't ever come unglued."   She leaned down to kiss him on the head.   "So adorable too.   You got that from your sister."   She took him to walk him off.

"Tara, they need to bond and that stuff," Bobby said. "All the books say so."

"Hush.   I'm getting him into real clothes instead of a blanket."   She took him to dress and came back to fuss over them.   The adorable one came in to help since she had learned how to fuss very well from her aunties and daddy.   She even brought in her electronic pony to share with her baby brother.   It was so cute even John cooed.

The End.

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